After 26 years I've realised I need vegetables in my diet.

Eat them raw, with some olive oil and lemon juice.

fuck kale

>>8143365
i am big fan of stir fry.

Do what the Dutch do: mash kale and carrots into potatoes so you can eat them like real food

Add sausage and butter if by some misfortune you can still taste them through the potato

>>8143369
For me they have to be cooked because I'm scared of germs. That's another story though.

Thants the kind of simple thing I'm looking for though, as I do enough cooking already. I plan to saute some romaine lettice in oyster sauce but know I'll get bored of the same stuff quickly, that's why I want to know how you guys eat them.

>>8143381
Why?

Carrots and lentils make a great mash with potatoes.

All kinds of berries and fruits and yoghurt will make a killer smoothie, add spinach and kale for extra points.

Add onions to everything.

>>8143390
Good idea, sounds like a good lunch food. That way I won't have worry about all the preperation with other ingredience bevause the sausage and butter should be enough flavour.

I do want to taste them though. I love vegetables, just never get round to eating them.

>>8143397
I do eat a lot of onions, it's proably the only vegetable I usually cook with. I want to go hardcore with proper vegetables though.

>>8143414
Why did you link this irrelevant shit with annoying music?

You pretty much either just roast or sautee them. I don't have any specific recipes, and if you plan for them to be side dishes you really shouldn't need any. It will become intuitive very quickly.

Roast in olive oil. Sautee in with onions in butter, drippings (my favorite is bacon or smoked sausage drippings), or any oil with a mild flavor and higher smoke point than olive oil. Season with garlic. If you like spicy, I find chili oil or dry cayenne goes well with collards.

I almost always have sweet pepper and some kind of cabbage in the house. Broccoli is fairly cheap as are string beans. Cauliflower is a great replacement for rice or potatoes. Asparagus season is close to being over so you can get some cheap asparagus depending on where you live.

>>8143426
Btw spinach pizza is the bomb, steam it and use liberally as a topping for homemade pizzas or flatbreads.

And you need them in your diet for what reason?

>>8143426
I plan for them to be like snack meals, as I already have good dinners and don't just want to throw them in whether the flavours go or not.

Drippings are genius, thanks for the contribution, will be including that when cooking them.

>>8143439
You know, to reduce risks of many chronic diseases and cancers? To promote longevity and well being? To get the vitamins and minerals your body needs to function optimally?

>>8143439
Appart from garlic, onion, and chilis I've gone my whole life so far without really eating them, and always thought I should, but because I don't put on fat I look like I'm in good shape, so it's been too easy for me to keep saying I'm fine without them, as buying vegetables would increase my shopping costs quite a bit.

But I've been thinking deep down I must be a piece of shit inside and can't be running in top condition.

>>8143439
Produce brings richness, creativity and variety to one's diet.

>>8143450

>buying vegetables would increase my shopping costs quite a bit

no.

>>8143445
>>8143450
If you're doing it for health reasons then a lot of the suggestions in this thread really aren't applicable.

So we have
- Oil several times -> shit
- Combine with potato -> good
- Add sausage and butter -> shit
- Combine with lentils and potato -> good
- Combine with fruits -> good
- Butter again -> shit
- Bacon drippings -> I'm not even sure people are being serious at this point

If you want to consume vegetables for health reasons you should be using herbs and spices, not refined fat or animal products. More importantly, you should unfuck your dietary habits and sense of taste so you actually develop the capacity to taste a vegetable without pouring gallons of fat on it.

>>8143490
I get what you're saying but I've never really cared about not eating fatty foods and watching calories. I'm more interested in what I'm not getting from food than what I am getting. If you can make sense of that.

>>8143490
>oil = shit
>butter = shit
Are you fucking stupid? If your diet is balanced there's plenty of room for butter and oil, and yes even sometimes processed meats like sausage or bacon. Jesus, the clueless fucks giving out retarded advice on this board sometimes...

>>8143484
compared to staples they're pretty expensive

>>8143490
Op here again, I missed the part about you telling me I have a have shit taste, I bet I eat better food than you. Get out of here.

I can appreciate simple taste, but if I'm eating something alone I like to make a bit of an effort to make something nice.

>>8143490
Yeah no shit? I'm vegan, the post with lentils was mine.

>>8143503
Adding a little oil to a dish once a month isn't gonna kill you, but vegetables should be consumed liberally every single day. So the advice isn't applicable, as I said.

There isn't "plenty of room for butter and oil" in a balanced diet, there is virtually none because these food items are directly deleterious to human health. I have this bad feeling that I'm interacting with someone who gets most of his opinions from catchy newspaper headlines, especially of the "gotcha" and "everything we know is wrong" kind.

>>8143521
You can't taste vegetables. You're like a toddler, and your reaction confirms it.

Here's a simple recipe. It's a soup, but it involves sautéing at the beginning.

Kale, blanched, 100g/4oz (preblanched weight)
Stock, chicken and/or vegetable preferred, 2 cups
Onion, quartered and thinly sliced, 1 medium/medium-small
Garlic, minced, 2 cloves
Chillies, minced, if/as desired
Cooking fat of some kind, 2tbsp
>lard/chicken grease and/or olive oil are most common, but use what you like
Salt, as needed
Water, 1 cup or so

Chop the kale and put into the blender with the stock and blitz.
Strain the solids from the stock itself and squeeze them of excess liquid, reserving both.
Place the kale solids, the onion, the garlic, the chillies and the cooking fat into a sauté pan, salt generously and set to high heat.
When fragrant, watch for first signs of colouring on the garlic pieces, then add about a third of the water.
Reduce back out and watch again for first signs of browning, then add about half the remaining water.
Reduce back out and watch again for first signs of caramelisation, then add all the remaining water.
Reduce back out and top off with the now-green strained stock.
Bring to a simmer and adjust salt to taste.
Serve with bread to dunk.

If you want a straight-up sauté recipe, just put some sliced garlic and/or onion and lard/olive oil into a pan and set to high heat and, when fragrant, add green, leafy veg such as spinach, chopped green cabbage, black cabbage etc then add salt and cook to desired doneness and serve.

For steaming, I like steamed carrots and parsnips with freshly powdered onion, salt, parsley and butter.
Peel and cut the root veg then steam in the nukebox; meanwhile, grind about 1tsp of dry minced onion to powder (I use a blender).
Place the now slightly softened carrot/parsnip into a container, add the powdered onion, some minced parsley, a half tbsp of butter and some salt (unless you use salted butter, then omit).
Lid, toss to combine and allow to finish cooking in its own residual heat then serve

>>8143504
That's the price per pound in most cases.

>>8143365
>vegetables

Get yourself one of those folding steamers or a steamer pot (perforated bottom). Great for potatoes and carrots. Saute some onions and mushrooms together. Saute some broccoli. Saute some spinach, it cooks down and is delicious.

>>8143543
Are you retarded? What made you think I can't taste vegetables?

If you were good at reading comprehension you would see that the reason I want to cook them is because I don't like eating things raw that have passed through many people's hands.

And it's ironic that you question my maturity when your answer to someones well thought out commment is "that shit this shit :( me no like"

>>8143566
No I mean in calories per dollar.

>>8143555
Thanks but this is something I definitely don't want to make for a inbetween meal. I'd make this for a nice dinner.

>>8143579
Why are you eating veggies for calories?

>>8143579
theres like no calories in veggies, its a filler food with great nutrients: so theyre perfect if ur meals uve been making havent been filling people up

>>8143582
I'm not, my point was they can easily increase your shopping costs if you are poor.

>>8143574
>>8143543
And I'll also add that whatever I cook I'm going to cook properly and make it tasty.

>>8143490
lolwut
breh sauteed veggies don't have less vitamins or roughage, they just have more fat
op didnt say he wanted to reduce fat or salt in his diet he said he wanted to incorporate more veggies

congrats on totally missing the point i guess

>>8143365

There's zero reasons not to have veggies in your diet as they complement the shit out of any protein.

Onions, bell pepper, garlic, and chilis are a part of damn near every meal I eat, and they get sauted and served with any given protein. Broccoli, carrots, and celery are also added when I'm going for an Asian stir fry approach.

On Sundays I eat collard greens with chopped onion, bell pepper, garlic, chili, and green onion, in chicken broth and a touch of ACV. While I make it with bacon and smoked turkey legs, this could be a vegetarian meal, and would be just as good.

I also do a German night once a week and add onion, apple, and bell pepper to my home made saurkraut.

There's no fucking reason not to have veggies, as they are delicious.

>>8143414
What does this have to do with anything dipshit?

>>8143436
Bechamel sauce (or even just sour cream), spinach, calabrese and cheese pizza is god-tier. Truly a miracle of the universe.

>>8143581
>nice dinner
kek
I find this funny because the soup recipe I gave is considered poor people food. I won't deny that it's really very tasty, but considering that the most expensive ingredient in the whole thing is the onion, that should tell ya something.
But if you think it sounds nice, I'll take the compliment on behalf of my countrymen, thank you. (:

Some other veg suggestions:

Get a very, very green head of cabbage and remove its largest, dark green leaves.
Stem them until pliable and set aside.
Chop the rest of the cabbage and sauté in cooking fat with several cloves of smashed garlic until caramelised.
Add pilaf rice.
>by pilaf rice, I mean boiling a pot of water, adding white rice, cooking until they're nearly, but not quite done, straining, then rinsing the rice under cool, running water until it runs clear, then shake the rice of all excess moisture; this is how white rice is prepared for pilaf before the rice is cooked further with flavourful ingredients
Add lots of grated cheese (Hermelin is nice) and stir about until all well mixed, then top with a lid.
Put your hand on the lid and, when it gets too hot to keep comfortably, off the heat and let the rice finish by the steam of its own residual heat.
Stuff the green cabbage leaves with the rice/cabbage/garlic/cheese mixture, roll up like tiny, green burritos and put into a baking dish.
Pour a sauce over top (tomato is nice, but whatever you like should be okay; I prefer carrot sauce or paprika gravy) and bake until warmed through and bubbly.
Serve up with sides of your choice and enjoy.

>>8143490
also..you realize just about any potato or lentil mash is going to have oil right

>>8143681
Sometimes basic humble food is nice after having a curry the last two nights.

That second dish sounds delicious.

>>8143490
You use oil when sauteeing or roasting vegetables so that they are consistently heated and don't dry out. It's not just because people aren't hardcore enough to handle the tr00 taste of vegetables without like 30 calories of oil added.

>>8143690
True, true. A note: I realised that aged Hermelin might be difficult to find in some places and many people who aren't French, Italian, Hungarian, Czech etc don't like Hermelin because of how strong it can taste. If you want to make that casserole and either can't find Hermelin or don't like similarly strong cheeses, you can use milder ones like Emmentaler or Edamer instead.

>>8143719
You could steam them if you don't want them to dry out.

>>8143365
Most of them taste fine by themselves, and are healthiest that way. Steam, boil, or microwave it doesn't really matter. Or just find ways to add them into everything else you eat.

>>8143395
I don't say this lightly because I hate when people call foods memes
but kale is literally cow fodder and a meme.
it has more nutrients than cabbage but only about 5% and yet people act like its a wonderfood so put it in everything including smoothies
the only use it has is as a texturally interesting alternative to cabbage

>>8144446
People are retarded, everything normal people should be eating are treated like panaceas.
And dinosaur kale is the bomb.

Melt coconut oil and whisk in paprika, salt, garlic/onion powder, and cumin

Wash brussel sprouts, then pat dry and cut in half

Toss brussel sprout halves with coconut oil mixture until evenly covered

Arrange cut-side-down on baking sheet, sprinkle sea salt across the tops, and bake at 350 until the tops brown and become crispy

Dip in mayo

>>8144446
>cabbage
It tastes better than Kale too. Chop it up, throw it in a bowl, add salt, smash/mash it down, and put it in a jar. Easy saurkraut. Great for adding healthy microbes to your gut.

>>8143365
Stir fry makes everything taste better

put spinach leaves in all your sandwiches and burgers.
If you're having a meal, just add spinich leaves.
It's what Popeye eats, so you know it's good.
warning though: as a non-veggie eater, you've going to have to stockholm yourself into liking them.
Start off with just a few in every sandwich or something, or wrap them around chunks of chicken, and shit like that.
Sooner or later, you'll start to crave them.

>>8143490
Did I miss the part where OP said he was trying to get shredded or something?

Talk about a total fucking lack of self awareness anon. No, those 10+ people didn't give bad advice. You're just an autismo who made all sorts of unfounded assumptions about OP's request. This is a cooking board. If you're going to have a fit everytime someone suggests roasts or sautees, it's time to gtfo.

Raw spinach, mah niggs

>>8144446
I'm with you, I hate when people jump on therse bandwaggons. How much of a mindless follower do you have to be to suddenly start earing something like theres no tomorrow because everybody else is.

I actually didn't know Calolo nevro was kale, it just looks nice, so I wanted to try it. I'm interested to know why you think kale is garbage though? I don't beleive in superfoods but thought it's probably one of the more nutrient dense greens that just got way over hyped for that fact.

>>8143503

Are you that crazy sugar shill that thinks sugar doesn't cause diabetes and oil is bad?

>>8144957
Sugar is no more a cause of diabetes than water is a cause of drowning.

Add shredded spinach or kale to soup just after you take it off the heat, so the greens wilt just the right amount. This is standard for Italian wedding soup, but also works with any brothy soup.

>>8144540
>wrap them around chunks of chicken

I'm not 5 my nigga, I'll eat them with some bread and cheese.

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Just got my way home from work with this, excited to have this tomorrow and start a better way of life.

I've never had chard as it's not that common where I live. Anybody know what's it's like? I imagine it to taste a bit like spinach/leafy greens.

>>8145685
You imagine right. I don't care for chard, but I love kale.

>>8144961
It's him!

>>8143543
So should fats, protein, and carbs. There IS plenty of room if you have a good diet. Do you know what a fat-soluable vitamin is? Whaddya know, you can actually increase the bioavailability of foods if you cook and prepare them properly, and sometimes that means cooking with fat.

You can't make blanket statements like oil and butter are bad when you can consume them and be healthy. Look at southern France and the Mediterranean. Large amounts of butter or oil, WITH lots of vegetables, and whaddya know. Some of the healthiest populations on the planet.

It's a shame that even the uninformed feel the need to disparage the truth that other folks post simply because you prefer generalizations and name-calling.

>>8144957
Not even a little. Excess sugar should be eliminated, and yeah, take it easy on the oil while you're at it, even healthier oils. That doesn't mean to eliminate them entirely.

>>8145708
Which kale? Curly green? All the faggotry around kale put me off haha, I've only had kale chips when there was nothing else around to buy. I'll put it on my list.

>>8145685
great with scrambled eggs

>>8145778
Just chopped up and thrown in?

>>8145685

I fry some onions, garlic, and mushrooms in butter until they're fragrant, then dump chopped chard on top and cover the pan. Reduce to medium-low and let it steam for like 20 minutes, then increase heat and stir it around to fry.

>>8145786
How could thay not turn out tasty.

Will be doing this.

Stir fry.

Cooks vegetables thoroughly and keeps all the nutrients and flavor

>>8143392
Stuff I do:

>cook mushrooms in butter or bacon fat
>chop asparags, cookie in butter or bacon fat til bright green
>baked butternut squash
>Steamed broccoli

>>8143490
>butter = bad
>bacon fat = bad

Enjoy your diabetes and dying at 60

>>8143365
do you like creaole food? dirty rice and rice and beans? when you make that shit, wait till near the very end, 5-10 minutes before finishing. cut up some leafy greans like kale and toss a whole bunch in with the food. It's fucking godly.

>>8145685
ANY leafy green vegetable is awesome when you combine them with bell pepper, onion, garlic, tomato, olive oil, a touch of salt and pepper.

Try this....

Heat some olive oil.
Add 3 cloves chopped garlic to infuse the oil.
Add chopped bell pepper and onion and cook until onions are sweated.
Add green leafy veg that's been cut into 1/2 inch strips and cook until wilted.
Season with salt and pepper.
Garnish with either chopped tomato or quartered cherry tomato, and freshly chopped green onion.

Delicious, and works with spinach, kale, collards, chard, and any other leafy green.

>>8143392
>>scared of germs

Unless you've got AIDS you never need to worry about this.

>>8143585
>my point was they can easily increase your shopping costs if you are poor.

If you are stupid maybe.

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>>8143543
>>>8143503
>There isn't "plenty of room for butter and oil" in a balanced diet, there is virtually none because these food items are directly deleterious to human health.

>tfw he gets his nutritional science from the 1960s

Btw the answer is FISH SAUCE and FURIKAKE
Stir fry, look up asian recipes
When i was in japan i ate a shitload of veggies because they know how to make them taste amazing via umami factors and tasty sauces

>>8145792

It's really good mixed in with angel-hair pasta in a butter/white-wine sauce

>>8144446
>it has more nutrients than cabbage but only about 5%
Bullshit.
>dark, leafy vegetable
>comparable in nutrients to pale vegetable
Maybe in terms of gross mineral and vitamin content, but not in even close to phytonutrient content. Cabbage is shit in that regard. Stuff like cucumber is even worst, and nearly all fruits are worthless (e.g. grapes, glorified sugar).

>>8143365
>I need vegetables in my diet.

you literally don't though, humans can get every nutrient they need from animals.

>>8143365
That kale looks like big labia.

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>>8146354
>phytonutrient

>>8146204
Thanks, I can tell that will work with everything.

>>8146460
Well yes, I'm alive so I can safely say I can live without them, but I'm not at my best.

>>8146491
Yes.
Retard.

>>8146473
4 u

>>8143365
Yesterday I made broccoli in garlic sauce. Sautéed a head of broccoli and made a sauce with half a cup vegetable broth, 2 tbsp soy sauce, 3 cloves minced garlic, a tbsp of corn starch and some chili flakes. Super simple and good.

>>8148037
I would love that. Definitely going to cook it sne day.

>>8143390
The carrots are new to me, never seen anyone do that.

Bacon bits and gravy mashed through them is pretty great tho.

>>8148083
I've never seen it done with carrots (hutspot) AND kale (stamppot), just one or the other. Although endive is more common, kale isn't unheard of as pretty much any leaf vegetable is fine. My favourite stamppot is red cabbage. Makes the mash purple.

And as for hutspot, I like to add parsnip to it, as well. Parsnip. Carrot. Mashing potato. Onion. Butter.

Peel and cut the starchy root veg and steam or boil them until just tender (I use the microwave to do it); meanwhile, slice the onion thinly, salt generously and sauté in butter until softened.
Add the root veg to the onion pan and mash it all together, evenly distributing onion and butter throughout. Salt to taste. I like to also stir in lots of fresh chopped parsley, though others consider this heresy.

For stamppot, I cook blanched, sliced up leaf veg with the onion then add the cooked potato and mash together. This is also heretical as the veg is meant to be either just blanched or entirely raw, never cooked. Fuck tradition, though.

>>8143543
>There isn't "plenty of room for butter and oil" in a balanced diet, there is virtually none because these food items are directly deleterious to human health.
>You can't taste vegetables.
10/10 bait wow

2.8 ounces of fresh kale in water microwaved for 5 minutes.

>>8146205
That's the reason why I'm scared of them

>>8143365
Welcome my brother.

You should try incorporating them into your meals rather than supplementing your meals with them. That way you find out how vegetables pair with meats and grain and you enjoy your meals more. I like mashed potatoes mixed with kale. Basically you chop up some kale, sautee it (you can blanch it or even just have it raw), boil potatoes and mash it up with the kale. It esp tasty if you sautee it
in butter, shallots and garlic.

>>8146205
Vegetables have high risk of e coli contamination than meat.

All the recent food franchise scandals have come from tainted vegetables not tainted meat.

>>8149625
yeah, that's usually because some dumbass handled raw meat, then handled the veggies without washing their hands/work surface.

>>8149625
Yes but those are franchises

Not stuff you prepare at home. Do you really not know the joy of a salad?

>>8149782
>>8149786
Actually, most large e. coli outbreaks arise from 'organic' grown vegetables (especially sprouts) due to shitty farming practices in which vegetables come in direct contact with organic fertilizers containing the bacteria, and said veggies are never properly cleaned. Some vegetables (see again: sprouts) are far more susceptible to this as they grow close to the ground and often aren't washed properly before going to market.

Local e. coli infections can arise from cross contamination with raw meats obviously, but that's never a cause of large outbreaks of disease or mass recalls of vegetables. Cross contamination with meat is a small scale concern, nobody is processing tons of broccoli and spinach and shit in a meat packing plant as far as I know.

>>8143369
top tier taste

>>8146177
>mushrooms
>vegetables
kek

>>8143365
you can try sautéing/ steaming them.

>>8146354
>>dark, leafy vegetable
>>comparable in nutrients to pale vegetable
what's the point of making assumptions like this when google exists?

What are some good vegetables to put into a salad?