I got a hankering for cookies but didn't have the necessary

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>>7539944
I had* by the way.

Step 1, as any good chef should, wash your hands.

I was picking my nose for a while before this and didn't want any of that in my cookies.

>>7539950
How did you take this picture

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>cream a stick of butter

I went back into my room for a second and this happened. Sorry everyone

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>>7539950
how the fuck did you take this picture

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>>7539961
Two Thousand Sixteen.

>and a cup of sugar
I've got this much.

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>>7539970
Two Thousand and Sixteen.

>,then add .5 cup peanut butter

I just added whatever I had left in the jar I guess it was like three quarters of a cup or something.

Happy to finally get rid of all of this dumb fucking creamy peanut butter. If you buy that shit seriously I feel sorry for you because you're retarded. Shit was gross. It was like eating flavored bread when I made PB&Js.

>>7539970
I would assume he has a mouth

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>and 1 egg
added it all into my sauce pan that exploded in the fucking dishwasher about 4 days ago. Still haven't put it back together.

I wish I owned a mixing bowl.

>,then mix in 1.25 cup of pancake mix.

ya got it

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it's happening

also OP wash your shits holy fuck everythings dirty

>>7539962
Thats not how you cream butter

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>>7540000
4got the pic but got quads nicc

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>mfw it actually kind of resembles and tastes like cookie dough

thanks /ck/

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Buttered up my two cake tins that I stole from my mom.

Also cleaned up the mess of pancake mix and peanut butter from my stove with toilet paper because I'm too cheap to buy paper towels.

>>7540022
Wait we're making cake now?

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Made little balls of cookie dough and placed them in the pans.

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Realized I had way too much dough for the two tins and remembered I had tin foil.

Buttered up the tinfoil, flattened out the two cookies in the cake tins, and made some more balls.

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>bake at 375 for 10ish minutes.

added all that shit to the oven at 375ish

YOU DIDN'T PRESS WITH FORK

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took a piss break while dem cookies were cooking.

Yo I just realized that COOKies and COOKing that's nuts man how did I not realize that in the past.

See why didn't they call them bakies or something I mean cook is such a broad term

>>7540010
And that's why you start with the dry ingredients.

>>7540047
This.
Start over OP, they're going to come out like beans

>>7540052
Was not expecting your toilet to be clean.

>>7540052
>that nice stream and volume

man i wish i didn't get a prostate infection 14 years ago that made me develop pelvic floor dysfunction and ruin my pissing for life

never underestimate the pleasure of taking a great piss man.

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>for 10ish minutes

10ish minutes passed and nothing fucking happened. Took them shits out of the oven and flattened em out a bit with this weird cooking tool that came with my spatula and spoon.

What is this thing even for anyway? This is the first time I've used it in 2 years.

I mean I know it's also called a spatula (right?) but like why is it so shit at being a spatula then? I think I attempted to flip a burger with it when I first got them and the shit wouldn't fit underneath. I just pushed the burger back and forth for like 10 minutes and got pissed when the burger burnt and I had to wash the grease off this dumb ass fucking tool.

It's literally just a square on a stick.

>>7540066
It's called a rubber spatula. It's for scraping the sides of bowls and the technique of folding.

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Attempted to make a tumblr design on the cookie and realized all I was doing was splitting the cookie in half

>>7540070
That's what you get for not telling us how you took the picture of you washing your hands

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Made my own tumblr design using the "RUBBER SPATULA"

>>7540066
The "fork" wasn't optional. Your flattening, which is good, but your not getting the little ridges that would be created with a fork. The ridges make the cookie better anon!

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Flattened out the balls too because they were still spherical.

20 minutes in and they're still not cookies.

>>7540081
Did you preheat the oven?

>>7540081
DO YOU NOT OWN A FORK?

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half hour or so passes and the spherical ones looked done.

I had to put the cake ones back in. They weren't ready until an hour afterwards. I don't think my oven works it always takes way longer than every recipe says.

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>>7540086
ya son.

Poured myself a cup of milk while admiring the gross beer my friends left at my house the other night. I couldn't drink more than 2. Labatt is gross.

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accidentally dropped the dumb cap friction creator mechanism into my milk while trying to 2016 my picture

why do they even put these things on the milk why don't they just seal the freshness with some cellophane or something

>>7540091
BAD FOR YOUR PROSTATE

BOVINE GROWTH HORMONE MAKES YOUR PROSTATE AND PROSTATE CANCERS GROW

>>7540097
Its the show that the tap is sealed and hasn't been tampered with

You can just remove it when you open the milk.

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>mfw they're good

thanks /ck/

I will do this again in the future.

5/5 recipe on pintrest if I could rate it.

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>>7540022
>toilet paper

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>>7540102
see the problem is that back at my house the shit actually stays on the milk. I always thought it was a necessary part of the milk container.

But up here the shit just falls off. I leave it on because I've thought it was necessary my entire life. I don't want my milk having less freshness and all you get me

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>>7540103
Please never make a thread here again

>>7540091
>lime beer
you know your friends are gay, right?

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and here are those two cake ones done

Well congrats on it working out

>>7540037
>>7540031
OP they burned on the bottom because you greased the pan
read ANY cookie recipe it says UNGREASED pan
also you probably overcooked them, cookies is a art and they look pretty soft when they are 350 degrees, but firm up to chewy with cooled properly

>>7541271
also research how to cream butter and sugar.
done properly it acts as a leavening agent, the sugar creates air pockets in the solid butter and fluffs your cookies

>>7539944
1c peanut butter
2 eggs
1/2c sugar

350F until done

>>7539944
This isn't how you make cookies, this is how you make FIRE!

OP, I seriously did enjoy your thread, thanks for the OC

i'm glad the recipe i gave you worked out kind of. i'm not sure what's in pancake mix but i would assume it is just some mixture of flour and salt and baking powder. adding baking soda if you have it could have helped.

and creaming butter is just mixing butter and sugar together until it is soft and looks creamy. don't melt the butter

>>7539961
>How
>>7539970
>how

Obviously the device was set on a timer then held somewhere such as OP's mouth or possibly between chin and chest nestled in the neck region.

Or someone else took the picture.