I want to start investing some money but I'm an idiot. What's

No you're not. You're lazy.

put all your savings in Bitcoin and wait

>>2888295
I thought bitcoin was dead

>>2888307
>cant think for self
>ask for help
>question help
Throw all your money into a high yield blue chip stock or a mutual fund

File: 1496242332965.jpg (92KB, 678x1007px) Image search: [Google]

92KB, 678x1007px

>>2888307
you actually flattered yourself with your OP pic

>>2888202
>safest way to do so

Government bonds, spread across several different countries. You won't make enough to keep up with inflation, but it is one of the safest things you can do.


If you want to actually make a return, but still want an idiot proof plan, and can tolerate some risk, look at index funds.

VTI - total stock market index
VEU - whole world excluding the US

Put most in VTI, to invest in every large company at once, and some in VEU, in case the us economy crashes.

>>2888313
I just don't want to fall for meme senpai

>>2888321
Yeah you're fucking retarded just kill yourself and donate your money

>>2888319
Thanks for the advice.

File: forest-city-5.jpg (160KB, 1020x610px) Image search: [Google]

160KB, 1020x610px

>>2888202
China's forest city is a very safe bet, just put in 100 million to start but have a few hundy more ready for when it looks like it's about to moon

>>2888202
ETFs, an index fund like SPY or whatever, ETFs are hands off and make moderate income

>>2888362
How do you think to manage investing any money into a Chines, or Malay city construction?

>>2888202

GO ALL IN ON RED

>>2888202
Choose something highly volatile that you barely understand and can get free advice on 4chan about.

>>2888599
this

>>2888202
The safest historically would be a precious metal. However, considering the amount of paper manipulation that goes on in those markets now I doubt that would work now.

There really aren't any safe investments anymore as the advent of indexing and the collapse in bond rates has pretty much made every avenue to put your money either non-productive or systemically dangerous.