>He doesn't do crime Are you guys even trying to get

>>1174840
Ok smartypants. Whats a good paying low risk crime?

>>1174847
No handouts here, loser.

Figure it out yourself.

Well

>>1174840
100% agree, but after once u get big enough, dont u gotta pay some jew politician to shield you?

>>1174870
By that point you keep your money in offshore accounts and move to a country that doesn't extradite.

>>1174840
Crime hardly ever pays compared to entrepreneurship.

>>1174851
Great thread faggot.

>>1174875
>Can literally make average monthly salary in a few days

Lol ok

All the smart people on /biz/ figured that out already tho.

>>1174881
he means in the long run you goofball
if you get caught you're done for
the risks just don't outweight the rewards

I figured that the boomers got us into this mess, sky high property prices, no jobs, ect, ect, ect so I'll just take money from them

>>1174931
>Make tons
>Worst case scenario go to white collar vacation for 1-3 years for being first time non-violent offender

Lmao. You're so dumb

>>1174933
lose your money and reputation for normal business
which means you will be only able to work shitty jobs or go back to being a criminal

>>1174933
>Worst case scenario go to white collar vacation for 1-3 years for being first time non-violent offender
You think they got off easy because they committed a white collar crime? They got off easy because they could pay to get off easily. Unless your net worth is nine digits, you're gonna get put in regular, old, prison.

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Hhaha, doubling my capital completely legally with crypto in a matter of a couple days vs potentially spending years of my valuable time in jail.
Stay poor, I'm buying memetic.

>>1174938
>Money
Lose what money? The one that's in bitcoins or offshore accounts?

>Reputation
Never had any.

You can start a business afterwards anyway, making your record meaningless anyway.

>>1174939
Many crimes in most countries and cases carry over light punishments if it's non-violent and you're a first timer.

>>1174957
What country are you in?

>>1174957
>bitcoin
Its amazing to me that people like you exist. Its like you were born without common sense.

>>1174964
Huh? What are you talking about?

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What crimes can i do with 1k€ besides buying creditcards from the deepweb?

Im seriously planning to start breaking into houses just for the "fun" of it. I live in a german village with alot of wealthy people which makes it easy but im still not sure if i should do it alone.

>pablo escobar
Dead
>el chapo
most wanted, will be dead soon
>cray twins
Dead
>al capone
Dead

All these criminals died by the hands of the law you fucking faggot. I'd rather not go down in history as a piece of shit, i'd rather not go down in history at all.

>>1174967
Just how much of a complete goy you are.

>>1174968
only if your a Muslim or of African descent, otherwise really shouldn't try unless your seriously committed at this point with nothing to lose

>>1174970
That's because they made hundreds of millions to billions of dollars, and did it for many years or even decades.

If they just stopped earlier they'd be free as birds.

Like Bernie Madoff for example. If he just called it quits at 1billion he'd be completely fine.

>>1174971
Explain to me then.

>>1174974
>Explain to me then.
Youre too fucking dense. It would be a waste of effort.

>>1174979
Yet you continue replying.

You really don't have anything to say, do you?

>>1174972
Im russian. The chances to get caught in the act are pretty low and i see it as a way to develop some aspects which will also benefit you in the legal reality. But the german police is pretty good so you never know what will happen.

Ironic that I see this thread. I spent several years after college as a journalist interviewing professional criminals and following them around while they committed crimes. I've worked with everyone from high class escorts to border smugglers, and do you know the pattern I've noticed? About 95% of them wind up on the other side of their criminal careers broke, bankrupt, with bad credit, and a record that fucks with their ability to do non-crime stuff. EVERYBODY thinks that they'll crime for a while, then launder their money or smuggle it offshore before going legitimate. Virtually none of them, even the ones who are successful and talented criminals, have the discipline to actually do this. I've known a very, very small number who have actually left crime behind (it's an addictive pattern) and managed to wash or conceal their grip.

Now maybe OP is Joe Kennedy, and maybe a Joe Kennedy is browsing this thread, but the odds aren't in your favor.

>>1174985
German jail is like a 3-4 star hotel

>>1174974
>Like Bernie Madoff for example. If he just called it quits at 1billion he'd be completely fine.
The way a ponzi scheme works is that you CAN'T call it quits, even if you want to.
Please answer >>1174958

>>1174985
Don't do it. You can get deported and banned from traveling to the EU, or basically any first world country.

>>1174983
I'm responding not to explain it to you but to call you a retard. No need to get all assmad shortcake, it was a shit thread to begin with.

>>1174988
Depends on the people you learn from and surround yourself.

>>1174988
Ever considered that the ones you've "known" are the retarded ones who get caught?

Seriously what kind of fucking criminal allows a journalist to follow him and reveals his fucking offenses and methodology?

You seem to think that they HAVE to do crime as their only job. You know they can go to University, work a "legit" job, etc, right?

Then they stop and use the money they made to fund legal pursuits. You don't have to necessarily buy a porsche and spend $10,000's on vacations every month.

>>1174992
Even if i already lived here for 20 years ?

>>1174993
Well done, you've proven me wrong

>>1175000
Do you have citizenship or permanent residence?

If you have either, then they won't kick you out, but most countries will refuse to let you visit because you've committed a felony. If you only have permanent residence, then you will never be able to get German citizenship.

>>1175002
At least you acknowledge it. We're finally on the same page sweetheart.

>>1175006
Explain yourself.

Why wouldn't you use bitcoin exactly for illegal transactions you retard

>>1174968
>What crimes can i do with 1k€ besides buying creditcards from the deepweb?
buy false money, use it in small amounts (10€ to buy cigaretes or shit), keep the change as profit.

>>1175009
Holy fuck you are clueless.

>>1175012
>I have nothing to say but I'm going to reply anyway

I'm all ears buddy. Let's hear it.

>>1175015
Calling you an idiot isnt something to say? I think its a mouthful.

>>1175010
That's more trouble than it's worth.

Counterfeit money is considered a much bigger security risk. His first idea would be much more effective.

>>1175018
OK you are a retard.

See how easy that was? I didn't even have to explain why or have an argument.

>>1175005
Citizenship. I prefer to get punched in the face by a owner then getting arrested so im probably gonna place 2 amigos on both mainstreet ends of the village and run when a police car enters.

>>1175010
Yeah its the same like buying credit cards in my eyes

>>1175022
I'm pretty sure everyone in this thread knows who the retard is. (Hint: its you)

>>1175028
No u r

Ur also gay

>>1175028
Haha ur gay

Lmao

>>1175022
>>1175037
Kek.

>>1175041
Lol he's trolling you. Were there always this many geniuses on this board?

>>1175041
Holy shit you're so butthurt. Like I said, it doesnt matter because this is a shit thread.

>>1175049
Ebin troll.

Trolling by bumping my thread :+) what a nice guy

>>1175055
No u are

Ur dad is gay

>>1174840
Another shit post by a Neet looking for attention.

/biz/ needs mods to ban worthless poor fucks like op who just shit up this board.

>>1175060
>Quick janitor ban them! They're posting things I don't like!

Why don't you just hide the thread then, bucko?

>>1175058
>hey gais u can meke so much muneys frum crime!
>i dunno how go figer it out urself
Epic thread lel. So much info in here.

>>1175064
>lol why aren't u telling me how I'm going to keep calling this thread shit but I'll stick around anyway and keep refreshing it in case someone says something I can use

>>1175068
Another clueless statement lol. The only reason I am bumping it is to call you a retard. I hope to do that at least a few more times today in between eating my dinner and watching Walking Dead.

>>1175071
You're clearly mad that no one is giving you a prepared way to make money with no incentives

>>1175063
Because I'd rather watch you sperg out over shit people say to you on 4chan.

Cybercrime is literally risk free. Other types of crimes like robbery,burglary,are retarded.

>>1175075
Just not a fan of pound you in the ass prison. Or the poor quality of this thread. Maybe equally.

>>1175082
Exactly my point.

>>1175086
No point in trying to explain how risk free it is though let them do their thing we'll do ours.

>>1175089
Sweet thread guys!

>>1175089
True. Neets are pointless to try to educate.

I've made threads on this subject but each time they either literally want a laid out plan without any effort of their own or they keep making excuses and telling ME how this shit works despite never having done it.

>>1175095
Hit up tor instead no point discussing about this with non interested people.

>>1174996

>says the amateur wanna-be burglar who has never burgled

>>1174999

Not particularly. Many of the ones I've worked with haven't been caught, but they still blow through all of their money.

>allows a journalist to follow him

Most anyone. When a writer goes digging suddenly everyone gets talkative.

>seem to think that they HAVE to do crime as their only job

Crime is psychologically addictive. You would know this if you weren't just an autist blowing smoke on a Carribean dune sculpting usenet.

>>1175099
>Most retards. When a writer goes digging suddenly everyone gets talkative.

>>1175095
I know right. I made a couple threads about how coke is better than pepsi and they made fun of me saying that my thread was stupid and pointless. Fucking NEETs thinking that in order to make a thread it should actually contain some substance. Then they have the nerve to call us retards? As if.

>>1175101

Man, slow up there Scarface. You sure are throwing out those hot opinions about your planned criminal activities on an open forum monitored by Law Enforcement and Intelligence. Masterminds of your caliber cow those poor humble folk such as myself, please take pity on a poor stringer-together of words oh great capo.

>>1175099
Yes but my point is the people you've spoken to are the dummies.

Ie the idiots who get caught regularly.

I hope you realize there's a lot more people who do this shit than you think.

The ones who do are the ones with degrees from top universities, legitimate businesses, etc etc.

>>1175104
What are you talking about?

No one here has admitted any crimes or even given specifics.

This is all HYPOTHETICAL, chill out detective.

>>1175104
Ok be honest. Lets say you were a criminal would you risk incriminating yourself for a stupid journalist?

>>1175071
I'll join you anon.

Op, you're a fucking moron. Go away.

>>1174840
>so le edgy
Wow this is the lamest crime thread I have ever read. Even /b/ shits out theads better than this.

>>1175108
>>1175110
Keep posting(I think all these posts are the same two people).

You're not going to convince us for freebies.

Try posting your boipussies tho maybe we'll change our minds

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>>1175114
Dumbass

>>1175114
I don't want freebies. I want worthlesd trailer trash to leave. Committing crime is for niggers and white trash kek.

>>1175099
I dont need to have stealing exerience to see patterns in social dynamics and be aware of neuro awarness. If you spend alot of time around retards your micro cosmos and neurology adapts to them. Just look at ranking systems.

>>1175121
You know you can hide threads you don't like, right?

>>1175124
We would rather just ridicule you for a bit.

>>1175126
Ohh noo please anything but that

>>1175135
Hey its a hell of a lot funnier than hiding the thread. I must say you take the abuse very well. Its almost like youre used to it...

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>doing crime when you can be buying MEME.
haha ok stay niggerish

>le edgy crime meme
Start a business you lazy shit

>>1175156
Pump and dump schemes ARE a crime in most places tho

>>1174840
Breaking the law is all about taking a risk and covering your downside.

Why do you think there are so many lawyers/accountants in Jew York?

>>1175119
>44 tabs

Wew

>>1175189
I kinda use my phone to store either articles that interest me, ways to make money, business ideas, my competitors ebay accounts that I'm screwing with, bulk purchases, trading accounts, backpage hookers, craigslist ads I might be interested in, etc. I would just bookmark them but I find its much easier to just scroll through the tabs. Then when I dont need it anymore or lose interest I delete them individually.

Just in case any of you idiots are actually considering some criminal activity to supplement your income, let me be the first to tell you that it is by far the dumbest thing one can do.

If they ever catch you, your life will be set back an entire decade from the jail time/financial ruin/destroyed job prospects.

I have seen it from every end of the spectrum. You can be a drug dealer in which case the government will seize all your earned money. You could be a black hat internet marketer in which case the government will also seize all your money. It doesn't fucking matter. There is no winning. It simply can't be done.

>>1175215
How do they seize bitcoins and offshore accounts?

>A decade
Kek. I'd be very interested in seeing you find more than a couple examples of people actually getting over 3 years.

I get it man, you need to keep up the idea that it's "soooo dangerous" in order to secure your business, it makes sense, unnecessary competition is only a detriment. But it's just incorrect desu.

>>1175220
>getting 3 years in prison is no big deal
You sound really young and stupid senpai. I've been in prison before. Its not the holiday you think it is. Also, felonies are permanent.

>>1175223
3 years in a low security honestly isn't much at all.

And again, that's assuming YOU DO get caught and convicted. - which isn't that common desu. You can play those odds desu.

Also in any civilized country(read: not Amerika) you can usually expunge your record if it's your first offense.

>>1175233
You know what's better than going to prison for 3 years? Having a job

>>1175238
For a lot of people their job, and life is like a prison.

Something to think about.

>>1175220
>>1175233
I am not talking about the length of the prison sentence. You see, when you get arrested and charged by the state, you have to defend yourself and this typically costs a fuck ton of money. You will set yourself back years financially when all is said and done depending on the severity of the crime. Can you guess how much a lawyer costs? Or Probation/Parole Fees? What if a DUI is involved? Can you guess how long you lose your license for or how much you'll have to pay for your DUI classes and license reinstatement?

I know you're just a troll but for anyone seriously thinking about it, trust me, it's fucking stupid. You can't even possibly begin to imagine the extent of turmoil the entire situation can cause.

>>1175245
Who the fuck mentioned DUI?

The fees will pale in comparison to your gains. Again we're talking worst case scenario here, this isn't likely in the least.

>>1175233
>3 years in a low security honestly isn't much at all.
You're an idiot who has obviously never done time in his entire life.

>>1175104

Everything posted here is satirical, only a fool would take it seriously.

SWIM is useful as well

>>1175249
Maybe in America where you get gangbanged by niggers on arrival.

But in normal countries you pretty much sit around playing board games and reading books.

AGAIN, for NON-REPEAT, NON-VIOLENT offenders.

>>1175220
It's not the time behind bars that will do you in, it's what happens after you finally get out. You won't be able to travel much or get a job with a criminal record. You'll be ostracized by your family and friends and people that know about your past will always see you as a criminal.

That said I like the idea for your thread, but it's a bit pointless as nobody will admit to/explain their crimes and all the people who get triggered will shit up your thread. 4chan isn't the place for this, in fact I don't think there is any place on the internet where a discussion like this would work, now that they've shutdown bad ideas.