what's the most depraved shit you've done to get off?

>>744508051
One night about 2 am I went to the park and jerked off.
I thought I would cum more or some shit, but it wasn't special.
I jerked off while driving once too, had to pull over and wipe off.

>go to a party with friends.
>party rages on, plenty of alcohol, and drugs.
>walk into one of the bedrooms, fat goth girl passed out on the bed.
>shake her a bit, she just groans and shifts a little.
>pull her top down a bit, doesn't protest
>lift her skirt up, tiny frilly black panties showing off her big pale ass.
>jack off while she lays there.
>Nut on her boot and leave.

a couple days later I found out that like 4 other dudes nutted on her.

>>744508051
Drugged my wife and watched as guys took turns playing with her at a night club. Drove home with her naked and parked outside the porn store, left the window cracked just enough so anyone could reach in and cop a feel. Then took her home and filled her pussy and ass with every large thing I could find.

>>744508777
I love stories like these

>>744508777
Quality :')

>>744508051
i put the handle of a plastic toilet plunger in my ass while showering. it was uncomfortable and didn't really do anything for me sexually, and i almost slipped once which just kicked my paranoia into overdrive as images of my funeral entered my head, people discussing how i died from toilet plunger ass impalement

>>744509042

Trips checked

>>744509212
/thread

>>744508311
i used to regularly jerk off on the highway, i had an old coat in the backseat i was meaning to throw out that turned into a cumrag

funny how that didn't even cross my mind as being degenerate

>>744508051
I once had consensual sex with a girl in missionary position.

Oh and I kept my socks on.

>>744508051
>be 16
>neighbours had sheep in their yard
>thought it would be funny to jerk off and cum through the fence
>sheep were licking the spunk off the fence
>kept doing this over 2 years, pretty much weekly

The sheep seemed to like it very much. Cumthirsty whores were actually waiting for it.

>>744508051
I was sucking a security guard's cock at a well known cruising area. I was sitting on a toilet and absolutely diamonds because I was blowing a man in uniform. I left the door open so we could have an audience, some dude sat on my cock and I smashed his prostate in while I swallowed the guard's load. Then I shot my load inside the dude sitting on me.

>>744509555

dude wtf

>Friend's 15 year old sister showed up to my house
>wants xanax
>feed her rufies instead
>dead asleep
>pull her panties off
>fuck her tight unconscious pussy
>cum in her mouth
>keep her panties

Best sex I've ever had.

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was dating left at the time, right is her sister kiersten... Kier would make disgusting green smoothies and leave in fridge overnight, used to sneak downstairs and jerk off in those, also her panties, coconut milk, and shampoo

>>744509840
Sounds like a typical restroom experience in the state of California

>>744509840
>smashed his prostate
kek

>>744510098
Australia here. That was a good day. The guy on my cock got a 3 week old load expressed because I was so turned on by the guy in uniform

>>744510072
Did the same to a girlfriend I had in Highschools twin sister. Made me feel like I owned them both.

>be me 12, horny, preteen fuck
>cute sister 9,little chubby,nice ass, always played weird games with her and cousin
>there was always a weirdness between us
>she had on a pair of little kids(9-12)booty shorts on
>they outlined her ass pertty nicely
>she had a really big ass for her age
>she walks into my room with her ds playing mario on it
>she sat on my floor hiding behind my bed
>i ask "what are you doing"
>she replies "playing mario on my ds"
>she sucks at the game and asked me for help a couple times
>then i go back and sit on my bed thinking about what i should do
>so i had an idea of a game i could bring back and use to fuck her
>she was will to try most of the games(me touching and groping her and watching her get naked)i asked her to do with no resist


in the game i would play with her ass. when we were younger i would have her sit on my dick with a blanket over us(we would both take our bottoms off). she loved playing the game because we played different version of the one game of about 4-5 years.
it was one of the weird things she liked to do with me. she never told anyone about it and we did it with people around us or no one at all. and only my mom, anxd sister know about me and her fucking.
well and my cousin but those are old and different

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>>744510171
I did, my cock is thick and when i'm horny I hammer it so hard i've broken condoms. I'm super fucking aggressive

>>744510072
More of the sister?

>>744510003
Jesus the made up stories here.

So she just woke up, realized her panties were missing and thought "nah I must have not worn any".

>>744510072
I jizz in the ranch dressing at work. Love when I see people eating ranch.

>>744508796
>>744510003
Love stories about people drugging and using women.

>>744508777
Based

>>744510271
cont.
sex with sister
>i slide next to her threw a blanket over us and pulled down her shorts
>she pulled up her shorts and tried to stop me
>she said "she didnt want to get caught having sex"
>i told her "nothing was going to happen"
>"lets play that game we used to always play"
>seconds later my mom walking into my room
>she tells use "get out from under the blanket and not to share anymore"
>i take the blanket off of us but still laying with her ass resting on my dick
>my mom doesnt really notice how we were laying and turns around
>she walks back up stairs(not to return)
>i throw the blanket back over my sister
>getting ready to continue my plan
>she says "that we will get caught"
>i whisper in her ear "no, not if we are quiet"
>i knew she wouldnt say no because at this point i was starting it play with her ass
>she thought for a second, but to decided to go along with it
>so she pulls down her shorts
>i start out slowly
>rubbing her ass and sticking a finger in to see how tight it was
>she was a virgin and i was the only person shes ever done sexual stuff to
>she never had any pain when i was playing with her ass
>so i put lotion on my dick and slide it into her ass
>she lets out a soft moan
>it was one of the best feelings in my life
>it was the start to a fun year and a half
>the first time i ever nutted was in my lil sisters tight ass
>at the time i didnt known it was an orgasm because i never felt something like that before
>she seemed to enoy it to because would ask me to play the game with her all the time
>we would say playing the game so my mom wouldnt ask questions
>she would just think it was us playing on her ds because i"loved" that thing
>i would know she wanted to have sex by her playing her ds with mario in
>she only had her ds out when me and her where together
>i never had to ask to have sex with her either
>she was always willing to do what i wanted, when i wanted

With the Hurricane around the corner it reminds me when I ate out my chihuahua during Katrina. Was a weird kid and i saw it on the porns I watched. Power had been out for 2 weeks aint shit else to do.

>>744510271
Sounds familiar...

>wake up to wind/rain on window middle of night
>house starts shaking
>sirens outside wtf?
>realize its a tornado siren
>freak out run down stairs house starts to shake
>get all the way into basement no one else in family is there
>run back upstairs and see sister running to basement
>grab her and pull her down stairs
>go back up to find parents house shaking to pieces roof flies off
>fall back down stairs and run to sister in corner
>sister screaming and shaking and crying as we sit in the corner
>lights go out wind throwing everything around upstairs floorboards start to shake
>push my sister forward and pull down her pjs cover her with my body
>push my limp cock inside her and pound her till it gets hard
>cum in like 15 seconds while laying on top of her
>pull out pull up her pjs and ride out the storm another 30 seconds.
>go upstairs whole house is gone parents are no where to be found
>orphaned and the next day she asks the state to be put in a different foster home than me
>never see her again.

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>>744510316

>>744511163

next gen

>>744511163
You win

Let a dog mount abd fuck my butt at 14

>>744511163
>>744511317
Samefag.

Also no one gives a shit about your bullshit story.

>>744511436
How was it?

>>744511447
>>744511317
Not same fag. You wish it was bullshit. But its not

>>744510439

First of all, check my dubs.

Second of all, this never happened.

>>744511163
Just...Why? You legit did it out of nowhere.

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>>744510316

>>744511163
F A G G O T same fag

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>>744509212
kek

>>744508051
I stole a pair of my co workers panties when she went on her lunch to the gym. I creep shots pictures of her for months and then one day got naked put on the panties and fapped to her slideshow while fantasizing about tying her up and busting multiple nuts in all holes.

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>>744510316
moar kier

>>744511648
I panicked and thought it was the end and figured I would at least enjoy it the repercussions were the last thing I was thinking about

>>744511842
Post the creeps?

>>744510353
WTF MARK?!

>>744509212
very weirdly I've had nearly the exact same experience except I wasn't in the shower

>>744508051
More of this girl.

>>744511624
it happened more then one time and with more then one family member. its easy to trick ur family into sexual situations. just depends on how u go about it.

>>744511590
It is bullshit and you fucking know it. Not only is it bullshit but it's so fucking obvious at that.

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>>744512200
Double fucking dubs checked

>>744512042
Don't fucking yell at me! I warned you not to eat it!

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>>744508051
>what's the most depraved shit you've done to get off?
took female hormones for several years, practiced female voice and mannerisms, switched wardrobe, got new name and female identity legally, started living fulltime as a woman just to trick men into having sex with me. It worked, I am engaged to a man and he loves me and his love literally gives me an erection, I can't get off without his cock

>>744508796
Story just proves you are weak. Had to drug her to get your way. Allowed other people to trespass on your property. Inserted large objects into her because your own dick was undoubtedly too small. You are a weak and pathetic excuse of a human and should stop dishonoring your parents by breathing our valuable air.

Probably sharing tons of naked pics of my girlfriend on b, and my ex before that when we were together

>>744512409
Wasn't expecting this thread to turn wholesome.

>>744509555
>REPORTED

I WILL be calling the local authorities.

I went through a huuuge con involving some of my friends to fuck a fat mexican girl. Should I green text?

>>744512296
You ever wake up and read the news and just sit there and you are like "wow that is fucked up" or "wow I can not believe that happens" or "What that happens?" How is it so hard to believe that someone got fucked in a basement during a storm

>>744509817
best story

Asked my gf to send nudes to and sex chat with multiple guys, hate that this turns me on so much.

I use my little sisters electric toothbrush to massage my prostate.

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>>744512502
still though i feel a bit bad and gay for doing it, I can't wait to get my penis removed, that is gonna be so hot

>>744510309
>>744510309

DOESN'T LOOK THAT THICK

plus if you do that, you're a faggot and terrible lay, kys

i rubbed my weiner until it spat milk

>>744512609
It's 4chan... Most of the shit here is made up because it's been a tryhard board for a decade now.

>>744512566
Yes. Fat Mexican girls are the best kinds of fat girls.

Tell the story.

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>>744512409
>It worked
What, your wiener vanished?

>>744512470

>triggered

>>744512470
Oh shit, looks like his wife responded to his comment.

>>744508796
You are a degenerate cuck. Kill yourself

>>744510003
It's not sex if she's unconscious. You should have said "best masturbation session I ever had using a girl as a cum sock". Either that or you missed the "n" in "never"

>>744512706

>comes from reddit
>calls 4chan tryhards

Lurkmore

>>744509228
Fucking newfag

>>744512664
Who gives a shit? You do you. You happy? If so, then fuck everything else.

>>744512742
at first I tricked lots of guys, then 50% of the time when they finally saw or felt my penis we would fuck, the other half just either cursed me out or felt disappointed. still though it was hot taking the gamble, being treated at first like a real girl while having a cock is the hottest thing on earth.

>>in middle school
>>hot blonde milf neighbor out gardening
>>can see her entire backyard from bedroom window
>>can see her thong hanging out of the back of her pants A LOT
>>grab my video camera i had just gotten a few months prior
>>film a few minutes of her gardening zooming in on her sexy black lace thong
>>fap while its happening (like i'm filming and jerking off)
>>cum really hard
>>stop recording
>>feel great shame
>>hide mini DV tape in room
>>search for it later
>>never find it
Somewhere in my childhood room buried deep beneath 10+ years of shit is that tape and boy would I love to find it.....

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>>744509212

>>744512470
Your post proves you never had a girl longer than a few years to get such fantacys, most dont act on them but sone do i suppose

>>744508311
ive been doing that recently, going out on a walk at like 3-4am and fapping in nature somewhere

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I pay for my daughters phone for the sole reason that I can provide her one with spyware on it so I have full control of her phone and can view all calls,texts,pictures,apps

>>744510353
You say that like we're going to think of you as a hero instead of telling to be an hero.

>>744512854
Please I've been here since the beginning fucktard. Left /b/ shortly after the Scientology Raids fucked this place beyond repair. Came back during the Fappening 1 for a while, then left, came back again during the most recent leaks.

And it's even more pathetic that it's ever been. Nothing by dick rate threads, trap threads, shota threads, cum tribute threads. And then you have people who think they're edgy because they're posting on /b/. It's filled with children now. No more raids, or invasions, no more doxing people, no more trying to bait people via chat, hell we don't even have the camwhores trying to get channed anymore. It's just 12 year olds and fags.

/b/ is literally worse than reddit now.

>>744513207
What kinds of returns have you gotten on this? Must have had some pretty big wins?

>>744511859
Dude you were dating the wrong sister.

>>744512332
Off by one, my friend.

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>>744513341
oh of course. shes off at college and she thinks I am doing her a favor. As if I would pay $70 a month and not get anything out of it my self. Wins vary from nudes pics and vids or info on her hot friends or knowing where she is at any given time through GPS so I can raid her pantie drawer in here room still at home.

7/10 Wife on business trip for 3 weeks 4000km away

Her 9/10 sister at home because shitty parents and she live w us.

Things get flirty... she wants to thank me for being so nice to her.

> im perfectly fine w it

spent next 2 weeks fuckin her as much as i phisically can

wife comes back... i behave... sister behaves...

few days later wife gets horny, we fuck... she falls asleep... i wake up to clean because no good to sleep w dirty dick

i come to bathroom and sister is peeing

> i have an idea

close door... get my dick in sister mouth

> she's tasting her sister pussy

she dont complains... gives me decent blowjob

right after ending, i go back to sleep... no words exchanged, all happened in the dark

3 years later wife discovers... we divorce

living w her sister nowadays... she's still a whore and im happy as fuck, her family hates me tho

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>>744513418
lmao i know... her sis Marissa was a big slut too though, let me choke her til she passed out and pummel her during sex, loved anal so much she shat herself on several occasions

My best friend left his phone on the kitchen table and went to shower he takes long showers so I unlocked it and ended up getting to watch a vid he took of his super hot gf rubbing her clit and pulling her nipples I've never cum so hard in my life the rush from the fear of being caught was insane

>>744513785
I do this all the time. Have a fake email ready and just email to your self.

>>744512741
>friend and his girlfriend and I go to a karaoke bar
>meeting a friend of hers there
>tell me shes a latina girl.
>expect hella chola cunt
>surprised to see frizzy haired girl with freckles, fatty with big ass and decent tits, hoop earrings, thick ass glasses
>signal my friend that the plan is on
>few acts go by, usual shit, people warbling embarrassingly through stupid as fuck ballads and shit
>Me and my friend get up on stage
>despacito
>me and my friend had been practicing this shit.
>make sure to make eye contact with her shy chubby ass while singing.
>shes charmed like a snake being played to by an old indian guy.
>after the song, get some applause even some hollars, start walking back to the table.
>four girls surround me, flirting hella hard.
>tell em I'm with someone, I don't got time for them.
>They're actually a lesbian couple and a couple friends of theirs I asked to show up and act like groupies for me.
>The whole night mexican girl won't break looking over at me, giggles at every dumb little joke I say, swoons over every word.
>friend's girl all over him as well.
>whisper shit in spanish to her, she giggles and swoons more, literally fanning herself off at one point.
>drive her home and plow the shit out of her.
>been dating four weeks.
>told her it was all a ruse
>flattered I went through all that shit to impress her.
>dresses the way I like her to now and calls me big papi

Shits pretty nice, shes a hell of a cook, and sucks a mean dick.

>>744513114
They act on them if they are whores and their partners are little faggot cucks

I helped my buddy fuck his sister (my girlfriend) and after he finished I blew the biggest load of my life into her.

>>744513870
Alpha as fuck.

>>744513237
Spoken like a true newfag

Stuck my finger up my ass in an attempt to achieve a prostate orgasm. Didn't happen.

Thought about getting an Aneros toy but I don't want anyone finding that shit.

had an awkward hand job from my mom once
Will tell story if anyone interested

met a girl for sex before I knew what she looked like.
kinda regret it since I nutted twice prematurely on her.

>>744514351
Greenbelt that shit nig

Watched beastiality out of curiosity to see if I liked it
I do, now I can only get off to that

>>744512409
show tits?

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>>744514351
Do it

after reading this thread, no wonder women are scared of men and their sexual deviant behavior.

>>744509840
Why can't we call you people degenerate faggots when you clearly are. Why to we have to use a politically correct pronoun that makes you seem normal? Just curious

>>744514351
>awkward

You are the reason we're here anon.

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>>744514716
Get out of here, Sharon.

>>744508796
Moral fag here, that should be the person who you should trust the most

>Fucked my gfs 14yo sister
>Made my gf get fucked by a dog
>Fuck a girl who was passed out drunk in the ass

>>744510769
i ate out my dog too!

>>744510439
Moar

>>744509212
I did it to but mine was a wooden handle

>>744513237

>watches YouTube videos of 4chan stories
>comes to b expecting "epic lulz"
>finds dicks everywhere

WEWLAD

>>744510769
>>744514967
Why the fuck would you ever eat out a dog.

>>744514964
Tell the gf story

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>>744509817

>>744512409
Congrats you Mentally ill faggot.

>>744515331
Which one?

I touched my cock to my sleeping cousins lips, then jerked off while standing right above her.

Jerked off in a department store while looking at a cute cashier. Came all over clothes hanging on a rack.

Fucked a random girl at a party. It was my girlfriends father's house. They were all out on the back deck. I looked at her, and just walked around the side of the house. She followed, started kissing me. I pulled her shorts down, got down on my knees and licked her ass and pussy from behind, got up, unzipped and started fucking her. I pulled out and came on her ass. We went back around and hung out with everyone for the rest of the night.

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>>744515234
/b/ and all of 4chan is poorly represented period by YouTube and other media outlets. They like to pick and choose what they want their audience to see. The media either loves it or despises it.
Pic is example

>>744514504
>be me
>be 19 still living at home (just mom and me, dad is in prison since I was 5)
>super pale and skinny, and with long hair (was into metal)
>got into trapping and cross dressing, even went out in public done up and passed
>never let mom know
>one day I came home all dolled up from the mall thinking mom was still out
>turns out she wasn't and caught me as I came into the house
>she freaked out and called me a faggot
>I ran into my room crying
>she knocked on the door that night saying she was sorry, saying not having a dad in my life made me like this, saying I need a gf
>told her I've never been with a girl
>mom being the transphobe she is said sex with a girl will straighten me up
>I said guess so
>eventually we stopped talking and she just looked at me a bit all dolled up, she said maybe I could let her show me something that would make me embrace my latent masculinity
>I said what do you have in mind
>she proceeded to slowly lift my skirt up, fish my cock out, and stroke me
>I was hard as steel yet I wasn't cumming, she went at it for almost 20 min till I finally came, didn't bust much because I'm on hormones

eventually moved out the week after that and left the state, finished my transition to female and haven't talked to her since the event

>>744515421
Middle one

>>744513001
Green text?

>>744513870
That type of behaviour is sociopathic. Congrats dingleberry

>>744515163
>I fucked my sister in the ass one day five minutes before she went to gymnastic
>the only reason i fucked her was because she had a tight body in the outfit
>i wanted to have fun with her before she left
>she did not hesitate to join me in my room
>she started to take her outfit off but i told her there waas no time
>our grandma and mom were upstairs waiting for her to get ready so they could leave
>i pulled the unitard to the side and entered her ass
>she moaned a little bit but to loud

at this point me and my sister were fucking regularly for about 5 months.so she knew what i wanted her to do when we fucked.
i never had to deal with her telling. even when we got caught she didnt saying anything about the other times we fucked.
she still keeps conversation where i bring up sex or doing something sexual to her she hides it from everyone. she sometimes freaks out on my and call me names but she never tells anyone.
back to the story.

>i play with her pussy when i fuck her now
>she plays her ds and is our look out most ofthe time(shes saved us from our mom a couple close times)
>i fucked her for about 5 mins before i nutted
>she went upstairs to our mom and grandma
>i went into the bathroom to pee and clean the cum off my dick
>before she left i asked if she wants to do it later
>she said yes

>>744509817
Is it hot in Pakistan?

>>744510098
What's it like to have aids?

>>744516039
So what compelled you to come on here and just make shit up?

>>744515492
Want me to hold you down, and roughly fuck you up the ass while pinning you down, you can call me mommy if you want.

>>744516402
fuck me in the vagina lol, I'm post operative as in snip snip

>>744513574
Shes sexy. Nudes?

>>744515501
>get a new dog, a puppy golden retriever
>Obviously everyone loves him, hes classic golden
>Gets really excited when people come over, so excited he gets hard
>Happens all the time, he loves belly rubs and he’ll lay there with his dick out wagging his tail
>One day he was doing this, and my gf looks to me and asks what I think it would feel like to get fucked by him
>I mean, you could find out
>She laughs, we don’t talk about it again
>Next week shes over, post sex, asks if I was serious about her finding out about the dog dick
>Of course, if shes interested she should do what she wants
>call the dog up on the bed and she starts to rub his dick
>dog starts to get hard, she rubs him more, fully jerking him
>He starts humping the air, she puts her mouth on his dick and finishes him
>She yelps and gets dog cum in her face, laughs
>Says she liked it, she got really wet and the dog starts trying to shove his nose in her pussy
>He starts licking her face and his cum, licking her pussy
>Shes really into it, moaning, saying how deep his tongue is going into her
>Tell her hes hard again
>She gets up on all fours and pull him to the back
>dog mounts her an is just humping the air
>I help guide him in to her, once he feels it her really starts pounding her
>Lasted about 60 seconds, then shoves the knot in
>She is sweating, convulsing, and cums
>She cant get his dick out, she had to stay knotted for like 5 minutes before he deflated enough to get out

She said it was really intense for a really short period, then being knotted started to hurt after a bit. We broke up about 2 months later and she went down hill, got into drugs, ect

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>>744516579

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Not much
>be me, 27, grad student
>pretending to be woman in sex chat forums
>masturbating while getting guys off
>decide I want something up my ass
>never tried, no dildoes in house
>opt for carrot
>not sure why, but sheath carrot in condom
>lube it up, up it goes
>jerking it with root up ass, pretending to be cum-hungry nympho online
>make giant cum
>remove carrot from ass
>remove condom from carrot
>eat carrot

>>744516598
>she went down hill,
no, no she didn't

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>>744508051
This

>>744516579
No, that's fucking gay... mouth or ass only. I don't fuck fake vagina's slut.

>If I get drunk and forget my morals where you at gurl?

>>744510353
id eat ranch at your restaurant.

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>>744516656
>eat carrot
Fucking kek

Made gf give her dad upskirt, walk around kitchen in panties

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>>744513237
>implying raids and doxing are not done by 12 year olds

>>744514822
You can do whatever the fuck you want. Nobody is stopping you.

>>744516368
nothing, just telling good memories i have of fucking my sis

>>744516039
more

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>>744513001
I used to ponder how that might be but as a lesbian who still only fucks girls.
No dyke would be off the menu

>>744513237
Totally agree

tried getting with cousin didn't work went home fapped

>Be me one day
>Bored, horny and have the day off work
>Go to a brothel
>Just my luck: All the whores are fucking Asian
>Whatever. I'm here now and I can't be fucked finding somewhere else.
>Go off into a room with a mildly attractive Chinese woman.
>She's not very good at blowjobs and whenever she hops on for a ride she's pretty bad at that, too.
>Taking too long to get off; have to whip out the big guns.
>I get her to lay on her front, with her feet dangling over the edge of the bed.
>I crouch down at her feet, licking them and kissing them while I beat off.
>Ready to cum in seconds.
>Ended up cumming, but it was overall a shitty experience and I haven't been with a hooker since.

>>744517325
still here... I tried to date a few women as a woman, turns out women are mean as fuck to each other. still though i did bone one after trapping her, which is a feat because passing enough to fool a female into thinking ur a female is harder than trapping guys

Had a thick GF a while back who had carpal tunnel. Got frisky one night in bed while she was asleep. She woke up to my putting my dick in her ass with just a bit of spit for lube. She hated anal and wouldn't do it. Well knowing her arms were too weak to fight back I just laid on top of her and raped her ass.she flailed and screamed no a couple times so I covered her mouth and nose with my hand and fucked the shit out of her. She never said a word about it after. Just got up and went to the bathroom to clean her ass. Dated for months afterwards too. 10/10 would rape again.

>>744509212
I know a cop who had to break down a door to a bathroom finding a guy dead by plunger impalation

>>744509817
>>be 16
>>neighbours had sheep in their yard
This was always going to be weird.

>>744517508
Reading that made MY tongue feel like it had feet herpes.

>>744509555
Ew

>>744512852
>Either that or you missed the "n" in "never"
I think this is the case.

>>744508051
rabies alert!

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>>744513042
Hahahahaha brooooo
I made a tape of my brother banging this marine chick when he came to visit us on greyhound, she got off with him (because he's got game like that I guess) so we hid the camera in my apt and filmed it while I "went swimming".. it all turned out cash, we watched it and she looked at the camera a few times but kept fucking.. >never knew of she knew or not.
I hid the mini dvr, in my house somewhere and forgot where. . I'm married and have kids. . I just hope my wife didn't find it

came on a girl's melodica's mouthpiece or whatever its called while she was upstairs

>>744514822
>boo hoo wah wah wah muh degeneracy
Why the fuck are you even here if degeneracy bothers you? Are you a glutton for punishment?

>>744517272
i plan on starting up a new sexual relationship with my sister in the next coming months. i just need to get her alone and when she doesnt have a bf. she is a lil bitch to me but likes it when i hit on her and slap her ass. i told her that i was going to own her one day and she started to blush. i told her she would do wat ever i said. i havent tried to fuck her in a long time but i act sexual towards her all the time.

>shit in a sock
>fuck the shit filled sock
>let my dog lick me clean after I came

>>744511842
Sounds normal to me

>be me
>be 12
>at that super fucking horny start of puberty
>want to fuck something
>sees 10 year old sister
>abuse her innocence by saying "ever wonder what a kiss feels like?" Or something along those lines
>make out with her
>making out is regular now, anytime nobody is around
>one night want to kick it up a notch
>brother is 8, we're all still young so it isnt weird to sleep together
>all sleeo in my queen size bed that night
>make out with sister quietly until brother falls asleep
>suggest "i massage here (slips hand down to vag) and you massage here (slip her hand down to dick)
> i finger her for a solid 10 minutes, ask her if it feels good
>mfw she says not really
>she takes her hand out of my pants, clearly uncomfortable
>she takes my hand away from her pussy
>she falls asleep
>i jack off to the thought of it
>its been 7 years, havent said a word about it since then

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>Stick big black dildo on closet (suction cup)
>Wear cockring/ball splitter combo
>Apply sticky pads for my e-stim onto my balls
>tape printed out of pic of Alison Brie above dildo
>Slide silver vibrator up ass and turn it on
>Squat in front of dildo and sliding up and down onto vibrator
>suck on bbc dildo
>turn on e-stim to max zapping my balls
>never lose eyecontact with Alison pic
>do this for 10 minutes until i cum
>repeated a couple times

https://youtu.be/ULnKLL56HBU
>>join alt right to meet alt whorez. CHECK MY CALLED SHOT BABE RUTH TRIPS

>>744514962
>>744508796
Agreed. The one person she should be able to trust. You're a psychopath?

I'd maim you for that. Run you down with a car. Bat to the kneecaps.

>>744517911
How old are the both of you now?

>>744518229
damn anon that was scary ghost level shit :(

>>744508311
>>744508051
ohhhh boy, here we go

jerked off on the highway A LOT until a coworker saw me on the way in at least

jacked off while walking home a lot late at night. jsut kinda on the street.

me and my gf broke into a house and fucked, fucked in a rain runoff ditch next to a college while people were walking by 15 feet away, ate her out on a ferriswheel at a music fest.

broke into a roomates room to sniff her panties

wore my ex's panties to jack off on omegle

more to come as i remmeber it.

>>744508796
pics of wife? she hot?

>>744518229
>>DAMN ONLY ONE OFF. UR NOT HUMAN, ARE YOU

>>744513114
I've bulled before, but still don't understand the men that get off on it.

Touch my woman, I'll fucking maim you. If she flirts with other men, it's over. Not even a goodbye. throw her shit in the street.

>>744518229
How did you do that shit

>>744518362
oh fucked an ex while she was passed out drunk

fingered one of my best friends gfs at the time while she was passed out in the backseat. she woke up halfway through and i claimed the next day i was blackout and couldnt remember

took pics of my ex while she was asleep nude next to me (pics are long since gone. old laptop died)

>>744515421

now do gf's sister

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>>744508051

>call friend to talk about cinema visit
>his gf answers
>giggl anon u called at teh wrong tiem lol unf unf unf
>yeah giggle and stuff see you guys later
>visit him a couple weeks later
>have to take a leak
>see her panties on a pile of clean washed stuff
>rub my dick on the crotch area till i'm hard
>wrap it around my dick and jerk off super quickly (not into it)
>fold it up nicely and put it back
>they broke up a couple months later
>see her on the street one day and hug her
>hey damn shame it didnt work out blabla take care

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>>744508051
I masturbate about making sweet lo sweet love to Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan...this was not posted by Michael Pence.

>>744513870
>>shes charmed like a snake being played to by an old indian guy.
Quote worthy.

>>744518318
im 20 and she like 15
shes fucked more than 5 guys(excluding me)
today she tried talking to me a lil flirty but shes been being a bitch lately so i ignored her. she knows i still want to fuck her because i always try.

>>744512409
Hey sister!

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>>744518229
are you the one?

>>744509840
gaaaaaaaaay

>>744513870
Read that as "She has a hell of a cock" I think I need to step away from /b/ for a while...

>>744512664
Castration? For real?

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>>744518959
Fucked every GF I've ever had while they sleep
Most enjoy it or don't mind

>>744517611
Honestly I would totally do the feet thing again; but I've completely lost any and all interest in hookers though.

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>>744519360
My apartment neighbors used to leave their windows open all night on 3rd story
>I was on 3rd story
>Would wait to see light on
>Could see in bedroom and bathroom
>Multiple times saw titties, fucking
>Girl was probably 18 or 19 and she would hookup with girls and one dude
I never got the balls to just go for it.
Fapped many times watching


Also, checkem

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>>744519601
I meant, checkem

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>>744519645
Okay,. Check it

>>744508796
cuck

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>>744512409
post feminine penie please.

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>>744508051
got a group of girls drunk and then had them beat on me and treat me as a sex toy
>4 girls that ive known for a while
>they are all lightweights
>one is a bit of a feminist, not the tumblr in your face kind but gets pissy of you make too many women jokes
>one is a sporty butch girl, most likely a dyke that hasnt realized it yet
>one is a wanna be punk rocker straight outta 2003
>the other one is basically Rory gilmore
>we're all hanging out, im the only guy there (which I had planned)
>playing mario kart, butch one is surprise surprise competitive
>beat her a few times, gets mad
>make jokes about lol women cant drive, getting the feminist one involved
>we're all drinking, im on my thrid beer the've only had one but are already tipsy
>butch girl is saying playfully she could kick my ass
>"Oh yeah? , i dont think so"
>we play wrestle for a bit, feminist joins in
>the other two also join in like one of those cartoon fight clouds that suck people in
>they nibble my, put me in headlocks, hold me down, make me smell their socks, one even puts makeup on me
>goes on for almost a half hour, they tie me up with tape and take turns walking on me and slapping me
>cum in my pants, have to play ot off like I was actually hurt
>scares them and they stop
>they feel bad about it for weeks
>I fap about it for years

I once housesat for my friend, and I came in her little sister's underwear twice while they were gone.

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>>744509228

>>744516792
Are you clipping her nails kek

>>744518940
Make sure you wrap it, or the wet nurse will have a new apprentice

>>744517508
that's depressing. you deserve better, anon.

>>744520588
easier to nut in her ass

>>744508051
The most depraved thing I came to once was cheese pizza.

I'm not a pedo but...

Yeah, I'm ashamed

>>744512664
Th3 fuck

>>744519360
Gorgeous t girl

>be me 9 years old
>goes to school faps in the bathroom about the other girlsin school actually fapped about teacher being pregnant
>fast forward im 11cousin sees penis when i change from just getting showered I get turned on she sees it tills me to cover up but i just stay there with a twitching dick she then tells me to come closer
>Lose v card
> finds sex wonderful get obesed with it continues with doing cousin over years
>she cuts me off at 12
> gets sex craved watch porn a lot
>finds 4chan goes to/h/ >after a few months to cuming to there wants goes to /d/ for MOAR >after while finally goes to random to check it out looks around for more hentai finds loli thread goes there gets turned on more than ever starts to collect loli porn
we are not done yet
>present day finds trap on b i love the cute bois fap to them want to be one already have the starts to play with my asshole after a few helpful mates at discord tell me where to hit the g spot

bty im 16 do i need help

Betrayed long standing friendships