Autistic shit you do thread. >be Spring and summer time

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> Native American powwow music

>>742583530
>watching anime
>episode gets to a moment where the main protagonist is kind of losing
>pause the episode
>stand up from chair
>start talking like i'm there
>do a "power up"
>pretend I'm in the episode
>I'm going to fight the main antagonist with my unbeatable power that I make up for this specific show
>talk like the antagonist is talking to me, try to do their voice
>act out a fight scene
>beat them
>unpause episode
>continue watching until the next moment occurs

I have no idea why I do this but I hate myself for it.

>>742583709
It makes me feel alive

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>>742583530
>the smell is awful but my lust for killing these little cunts is worth it.

>>742583530
>wait until no one else is around
>try to imitate animal noises
>sometimes I'll do demon noises or shit I've heard from horror movie monsters
>I've gotten really fucking good at it

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>Catch June bug
>Tie a string to it's leg
> Catch bigger June bug
>Tie other end of string to it's leg
>Release them and watch them spin in circles trying to fly off
>Imagine how shitty the rest of their short lives will be
>Fucking laugh hysterically

>>742584185
vocaroo pls

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>>742583530
nigger wat in the wat

>>742584223
That reminds me
>be about 8 years old
>find grasshoppers
>pull their jumping legs off
>watch as they walk around like regular bugs
>though it was hilarious

>>742584296
there are other people home right now, i don't want them to hear my literal autistic screeching

>>742584223
OP here, might have to try that next season. See if I can't hit them with a baseball bat midair and send them flying into my privacy fence. This could be a new art for me

Bug torture is still animal torture you fucking hypocrites.

>>742584644
shut up retard

>>742584644
Fag

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>>742583530
Why don't you make a Anti-Gravity & Levitation device with these beetles.
The hard shell of your beetles have anti-gravity effect.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYJXE4FCm7Q

>>742584723
Don't call me retarded. You don't know me.

>>742584415
Lol

>>742584785
Don't call me a faggot when you are likely one.

>>742584644
OP here. Sometimes I go buy dried crickets from the store and eat them. I've also fed them to my dogs. It all started when I ate a live cricket in the middle of class.
>be in 8th grade a few years ago
>someone spotted a cricket with a broken leg
>teacher was gonna put it outside
>I say "I'll eat it" half joking
>she puts it in front of me, on my desk
>little cricketnigger didn't know what was going on
>teacher didn't believe I'd eat it
>think again you dyke
>eat it in front of everyone
>be dubbed cricket boy

>>742584920
Cricket Man.

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>>742583922
holy fuck, I have mixed feelings about it

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>>742583530
>be 3am
>i am the nightman
>long weird walks thinkin about shit
>have a wall i like in town
>just looks cool, plants growing on it, brick walkway up to it
>i go to wall most nights and just kinda look at it for a bit
>leave small trinkets, cool rocks/sticks, seeds, buttons at the wall
>nobody's found my boo radley gifts yet

>>742584415
go outside and record it with your phone

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>>742584487
try with badminton rocket, it's fun as fuck

>>742584185
do voice acting, people would pay money for that if your recordings are good enough quality. people make livings off that shit

>>742585530
You're a good guy
>live in Nebraska, nearby large river
>head out to and walk up river once a week, to a certain sandbar surrounded by trees
>do something each time I'm there to the place
Last time I was there, I built a teepee out of dead trees. Another recent one I drove a post into the ground, another time I built a bench from boards that had washed up. It's my relaxation time

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>>742585866
no one will let you fuck their ass because of that anyway

>>742585866
i feel you m8 i get so stressed lately i just gotta go down to a river and watch it for a while and decompress. I've got a nice little spot but i'm moving to another part of town. the river goes through there too, i'm just gonna miss my haunts

>>742586519
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anS6bcPpvoQ

>>742584920
>live in FL
>catch lizards
>stick them to sap covered trees
>stick
>stick
>stick

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I'm normal looking and can hold a conversation like a normie. However I'm fascinated with killing and setting up bug fights. It's like playing god

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>>742586764

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>>742586764
I stuck it on barbed wire and watched it crawl for a few feet, after wiggling itself off. It left a small trail of fluid

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>>742584675
They buy 10k of that shit in china for 10 cents each and charge you the delivery fee, yep its free moron

i like to catch flies and take their wings off, then cut their legs short, or remove all but two legs, etc and watch them try to walk around.

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Every time I smoke weed I record voice notes, sometimes videos, take stupid pictures, write notes etc. After 7 years I accumulated 200 GB of material, 99,9% of which is bullshit and I haven't even heard/seen it. I do read my notes tho, it's like a diary and sometimes it's hilarious.
My faces when one time at my good friend's birthday I went a bit away, started talking to myself and recording it. He came to me, drunk as fuck, we started talking, he started talking about things that pains him in life etc., shit got a bit emotional, I was holding a phone in my hand and recording the whole time, he knew my habits and asked if I'm recording. I said yes to check his reaction. He went full mental, started yelling I betrayed him and eventually punched me in the face and broke my phone into pieces. We don't talk anymore.

>>742587717
fuckin a m8

you should make a lil book of the funniest/weiredst/best shit u recorded and put it up here

>>742584827
thanks for that really nice video. Not OP, but that was really interesting

>>742584223
I used to catch horse flies as a kid. I'd jam small twigs up their assholes and let them go to see how far they'd fly before dying. Looking back now it seems a little fucked up.

I could catch lizards as a kid and put them in the a/c thing in my back yard and watch them explode

Don't know if this is considered gay but sometimes and I don't know why so don't ask but when I'm about to take a shit I like to put a finger in my ass and poke my poop before I shit it out

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>>742584644

So glad humans will be extinct soon.

They are stupid, destructive, and worthless.

OP should self immolate immediately.

>>742583530
That's not autism. That's psychopathic red flags.

Step up and move to humans fag.

>>742588514
I also like to smell my tonsil stones even though I know they smell fucking horrible

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>>742587876
I was planning to do it when I'm retired haha. It's too much of nothing in there

>walking over a bridge
>"what if I just threw my phone over right now"
>driving in my car
>"what if I just ran that person over"

>>742583530

Your mother should have kept going with the coathanger till she achieved success.

>>742588076
Nah horse flies can fuck right off

>>742588702
I get retarded impulses like that too like sometimes when I'm laying in bed I'll spaze out fling my legs and arms and take my blanket off for like no reason what so ever

>>742583922
checked

>>742588702
I think everyone does this. It's like you're troubleshooting your brain
>what if i.. nah, still sane

>>742585530
this is so fucking weird
bless you anon

>sit in my laundry room smoking weed some times
>some big ass palmetto bugs live under my washing machine
>lure them out with cat food and have them crawl on my hands
>i know they can carry disease but i see no harm in holding them and letting them be
>i do this with spiders too. Some times flick pinhead crickets that are born in my lizard tanks into their webs and watch them go apeshit
>some times ill just watch bugs and snails go about life
>wish i could drink down to the size of a beetle and explore my back yard

>>742583530
I was just rocking back and forth in my seat because it feels really good but i'm actually autistic so I have a reason.

>>742589380
>>wish i could drink down to the size of a beetle and explore my back yard
me too

>be me
>be alive

>>742588514
I've done that

>>742589428
I want drone technology, robots and VR to come together to give me a tiny bug drone i can control and exolore the world with

>>742589380
hell yeah

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>>742589198
yeah lol, I used to do that too but I had to stop because I was clinging to those thoughts too much...

>>742588701
so are like, atoms, man.

>sit over my cat for minutes at a time wiggling my fingers like a puppeteer
>this gets her irrationally mad and she'll just get more and more uncomfortable
>use my cat as a musical instrument by doing different gestures to get her to make different growls and annoyed meows
>i probably look fucking insane doing this

>>742588702
>>742589198
that impulse is called "l'appel du vide" or call of the void in french.

>>742584839
Retard artistic dickheaded sperg
No one cares about insects

>>742584185
me and you both lol. I used to climb the stairs when I was younger and pretend I was a lizard...but ya know back in the day that was called having a imagination, not being "autistic"

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>>742589652
lol good one. Ok, I'll upload a sample for you.

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0AFWXUckUC7

To all the anons making bugs "suffer", you should know two things:
1. If you are torturing them to make them feel pain, you are failing. Most critters and bugs lack nervous systems, and thus do not possess the capacity to feel what we conceive of as "pain". At most they will feel some extremely basic form of confusion, but don't pat yourselves on the back for making their existence torturous and horrid. You're not.
2. Many insects get horrifically mauled by other creatures and insects anyway, so nothing is fundamentally different from what their lives would have been. Your "sadistic" torture is fundamentally pointless.

>>742584827
Literally the most retarded shit ever, i could not believe it when i first heard about it how fucking crazy people have to be to make this shit up!

>>742588514
I wish i was never born after reading that.

>>742585614
Why did you save thumbnails, you fucking newfaggot?

>>742583922
Fucking fag

>be me at 12
>eating Cheetos
>like them, but they lack a little... something
>layer peanut butter on them
>fucking delicious but obnoxious to clean up

I've put peanut butter onto a lot of foods that don't make sense. Peanut butter in a tortilla for an easy lunch. Peanut butter on pancakes.

I've discovered the fundamental rules of why peanut butter tastes good in some situations and not in others.

So... that qualifies as autistic, yeah?

>>742590249
Its not pointless if you get personal pleasure from it.

>>742591222
No, thats culinary innovation.

>>742588701
>when I'm retired
>implying you won't an hero before retirement age

>>742591354
Peanut butter tastes weird when:
1. Food is too oily.
2. Food is incredibly wet for any reason
3. The basic taste of the food is bitter.
4. If the food is too spicy.

Meanwhile, it works well when:
1. The food is dry, such as a dry tortilla or with powder.
2. The food is either sweet, salty, and/or mildy spicy.
3. If the food is crunchy or very soft. In between isn't as good as the extremes.
4. When it isn't meat: most of the time, meat is oily from the cooked fat.

>>742591620
For some reason, though, pork tenderloin works decently well.

>>742584827
1000mph... yah, right.

When i was in college i raised a colony of roaches in a tank under my bed, i have no idea why.
But it was fun

>>742583530
why don't you kill yourself, you pathetic loser?

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>>742591389
yeah, I was thinking about that too. Maybe someone from my family will go through all that shit to understand why I killed myself.

>>742591871
Are you a bit slow?

> be me in middle and high school
> discover fps games (lived in conservative Christian home)
> run around at school pantomiming holding various firearms
> literally memorize reload animations and recoil patterns and mimic them for fun
> be now
> 20 years old
> still do this sometimes when out of sight at work

>>742592002
Dude, if you can keep it together, you can publish a novel of epic proportions that can allow us to fundamentally understand human thought on a deeper level.

Don't do it, my dude. We have much to learn from the weed-speaker.

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>>742583530
>eat two organic bananas a day
>consume a total of < 900 calories a day
for weight loss
>still watch anime despite being 28
>play RuneScape daily
>say things like "KaioKen times ___" when doing heavy lifting at work to give me strength
>go about 6 towns over by train, and then walk 2 miles to a specific supermarket just to say "hi" to one person who works there, and maybe spark up a conversation
>dress in all black while jogging in 90º+ heat
>watch K-Dramas
>listen to K-Pop
>sometimes wear clothing of my favorite K-bands in addition to anime shirts
>fap to traps and sometimes other men

watching hentai... for the plot

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to add to>>742592187
>sit in my car 30 mins before work and eat, without using the air condition
>wipe both ways several times, folding the paper each time, until I wipe completely white

>>742592105
why don't you? do your part to improve the world.

>>742592296
i did the same thing with monster musume
hard to fap when you're invested in the plot

>>742592111
*slowclap.png*
I appreciate your efforts. May you kill the invisible Nazi scum for us all.

>>742591222
I love putting peanut butter in tortillas

>>742584920
The adventures of Cricket Boy and Dubblemint Dave continue

>>742592687
I was literally known for running around with invisible MP5's and M4A1's. Gods, I was a lonely, helpless faggot then. Got myself a girl with a rockin' bod now, an otherworldly sexual appetite, and a job that I'm moving up very quickly in.

>>742592111
I pretty much do this too including very shitty and impractical sword swings and parrys. Worst part is that my family has caught me several times doing this. All this started during elementary school when I had played Halo 2

>>742589720
No idea why that'd piss off your cat.

>>742592524
>>wipe both ways several times, folding the paper each time, until I wipe completely white
That's just being thorough. I do that too.

>>742592524
>sit in my car 30 mins before work and eat, without using the air condition

I do this too.

>>742593596
She is easily offended. If I make weird hand gestures over her she thinks im either mocking her or about to touch her and the anticipation makes her upset

>>742593932
Yeah, fuck that. It's over 90 in the summer here. I'd die.

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>>742594125

>>742583922
Checked, Anon powered up

>>742594125
I'm used to it. I work in a warehouse.

>>742583922
just nostalgia anon

>>742592111
check and i would just run around my home with toy guns

>>742592524
ocd as fuck

When im cleaning or doing shit i dont want to i usually have conversations with myself about things that will never happen

I buy a lot of steam games but still only play the same 4 games. I have 180 games installed that ive only played once

>>742583922
You too huh?

When I am in deep pain I turn on the radio (I never listen to it) and sing along very violently. Also I run around with a dispenser that contains dried garlic powder. I have to add it to anything I eat, even when it already contains a ton of garlic.

>>742583530
I watch podcasts and i sit there talking out loud like im part of the conversation .

>>742583530
I play with them
I play with bugs at the age of 25

>>742584827
>strings and electromagnets

>>742583530
>bite my nails
>peel skin of my fingers
>peel skin of body in general
>grind my teeth
>have twitches
>have tics


cant stop it either, im completely tweaked out. weed used to help but now it only makes me paranoid and anxious.

>>742588559
>humans deserve extinction for killing animals
>animals can kill anything and it's always ok
>trying to call anyone else a hypocrite

>>742587679
When I was twelve, I caught a fuckton of fruit flies, ripped their wings off and placed them into an aquarium to try and see what would happen if I just kept ripping their wings off generation after generation.
Unfortunately, the experiment got cut short after a few months when, I shit you not, one of my ceiling fan's blades fell on the aquarium shattering it. My father found my room with hundreds of fruit flies in it accompanied by the stench of the food that was rotting inside the aquarium and when I came back from school he beat the living shit out of me with a set of jumper cables so I didn't dare to continue the experiment.
I think by the end I noticed that some of the flies hat wings that were a bit shorter but that might have been just my imagination.

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>Be me 10 years old
>At friends bday party
>Plays outside barefoot because im 10 and it feels good
>Step on bee
>picrelated.kek
>Precedes to make it a goal to catch every single bee I could
>End up with quite a few
>Drown each one slowly one at a time

Fuck them niggas

>>742599236
Thats actually pretty interesting. Rapid evolution is used mainly with fruit flies Nice job anon, be a scientist

>>742583530
>get born
>reproduce
>die

>>742601356
Thanks but I'd rather do something that pays well and reliably and keep sciency stuff to my hobbies

>>742594291
Oakland park? Im close af nigga tryna get a drink?

>>742588076
We would tie horse hair around their necks and they'd fly up and spin in circles, then when we were done we could pull the horse hair and it would pop their heads off

>>742585614
He has 27 of these

>>742583530
i do vaguely the same with mosqitos. catch them in a trap, load some propane into the container, light a fuse sit back and watch.

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>>742589511
Did this once. Never again.

>>742583922
Wow, you sound absolutely pathetic. I'm sure you're fat as shit too so it makes you look even more autistic.

>>742594291
53% humidity, cute. I'd sleep like a baby. Come South my nig!

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>>742583530
>2am
>Everyone else is asleep except from neet brother
>Start arguing/bantering/venting with myself
>Sometimes I do it for hours on end
I'm so lonely

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>blast anime theme music and Power Rangers songs through my car radio
>sometimes order a Mighty Kids meal from McDeath's

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I count everything. Footsteps, stairs, breaths taken from one time to another, tiles on a floor. If anything hits 13 I keep going, can't stop there. I count when nothing is happening if my mind is blank. I count up quickly when trying to sleep to see how far I can get. If I'm trying to stay in bed and sleep ill tell myself "ok another 100 count" (although in that case I fall back to sleep b4 100 usually).

I literally count everything including my own breaths and especially if anything starts tapping or beeping, or repeating any sound, I start counting immediately until it ends.