Wanna hear about my shit day at work today? >be me >work

>>740417583
nah

>>740417583
No thanks.

File: michael's girlfriend.jpg (4KB, 240x210px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 240x210px

Do it faggot

>>740417705
Brendan?

>>740417583
no

>>740417612
>>740417676
>>740417792
Ok I won't

eh okay

eh why not

continue brendan.

>>740417583
just go on mdfk

>>740418017
brendan got spooked

>>740419210
RIP Brendan.

File: flat,800x800,075,f.jpg (24KB, 800x522px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 800x522px

>>740417910
>>740417961
>>740418017
Ok cool

>get to Target
>no idea what I'm doing
>ask to talk to manager
>manager hands me a box with about 80 ram sticks in it
>gives me a list of all the computers/registers I need to upgrade
>didn't read any of the procedures I was supposed to the day before
>walk up to first register
>realize I forgot to read procedure on how to open the fucking thing so I can get to the ram part inside
>ohfuck.jpg
>see no screws
>no levers
>It's just a solid box
>start panicking
>oh wait I have the schematics on my phone
>phone is dead
>fuck
>it's been 30 minutes
>need to look busy
>stare intently at register to give the appearance that I'm studying it while waiting for phone to charge
>grab screwdriver
>there's about a 3 inch opening between the register and the back of the wall it's resting against
>take screwdriver and insert it into hole
>start banging screwdriver on inside of hole
>target employees look at me funny but don't say anything
>they think i'm hacking the mainframe

cont

>>740419574
Brendan lives!

yeah

>>740419574
Kek

>>740419574
Keep going OP

Getting interesting. Continue anon

>>740417583
> previous ram tech
Loving this keep going op

>>740419574
Hacking the mainframe... well I guess technically you are.

what a load of shit. target would not sell you that much ram at once, they limit it to like 8 sticks.

Type faster Brendan.

>>740420030
Are you dumb?

>>740420008
Kek

>>740420008
Double kek

>>740419574
>>start banging screwdriver on inside of hole
not that kind of ram, OP

File: Untitled.jpg (16KB, 233x245px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 233x245px

>>740419636
Brendan is my autistic room mate

>phone finally charges and I can see the schematics to the registers
>figure out how to open the shit
>holy shit is it obnoxious
>The motherboard is actually another smaller box that slides out of the bigger box
>The wires inside are literally moms spaghetti
>with dust as the sauce
>in order to remove the smaller box, you have to remove all the wires on the inside
>There is about 3 inches of clearance so you have to do it blind
>It's annoying but doable
>all except the fucking VGA cable
>Little screws that keep them connected to the monitor have not been moved in probably years
>rusted shut
>They are fucking IMPOSSIBLE to turn via hand
>There is not enough space to use a screwdriver
>Use the flat part of my phone charger to turn the shit
>it was the most autistic thing I've ever done

cont

>>740420627
I don't think you understand what autism is

But keep going

>>740420857
People just use autism as a slang word for retarded now.

>>740420989
A slang word for another slang word that's edgy

>>740420989
Well that's autistic.

File: 10743-200.png (4KB, 200x200px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 200x200px

>>740420627
>Get all computers on my list done after about 5 hours
>Call my team
>"Hey all the computers are done, can i go home"
>"My system is telling me that some computers aren't done"
>"Which ones?"
>Proceeds to list every computer that I just worked on
>"Sir, I'm sure I upgraded the ram in each of those machines"
>"Well reboot it, and upload a picture of the BIOS showing that all 16 gigs are on the system"
>"Ok"
>Goes back to first register
>Realize I never checked the ram on any of the computers after upgrading
>open the first register bios
>it still says 4 gigs
>wtf
>Check ram sticks
>They are definitely installed
>wtf is going on
>do some digging
>realize the ram I was given was the previous ram tech's OLD ram
>Also realize that the office gave me the list of computers that were done, not ones that I needed to do
>I just undid every computer that the previous tech did and it took me 5 hours

cont

>>740421179
Oh shit retarded is an actual word, wtf is wrong with me

>>740421198
no shit

>>740421179
retarded isn't slang. it's an out-of-date medical term.

File: vsauce.jpg (29KB, 300x225px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 300x225px

>>740421179
slang is slang for shortened language

>>740421265
yikes holy shit that is fucking impressive. Do you have relatives who work for Exxon Mobil or BP?

>>740421337
I just realized that, how embarrassing

>>740421342
Yeah it's been a long day

>>740421265
I would have just quietly walked out and moved towns.

>>740420627
I don't think you understand what autism is

But keep going

>>740421265
Jesus, dude come on...

>>740421265
At least OP is typing fast I'm vested.

>>740421337
Out of date? since when? Doesn't it pretty much just mean "Slow of the mind"

>>740421577
It triggers normalfags.

>>740421265
Nice job fuckhead
Now what?

>>740421577
Yeah it's an actual word, I always thought was slang.
Turns out to actually be an adjective.

>>740421265
Fleedle!! XD cont OP

>>740421337
just gonna point out the last 4 digits

File: 1416016961965.png (493KB, 698x741px) Image search: [Google]

493KB, 698x741px

>>740421265
This turned out to be somewhat interesting.

>>740421632
What is normal?

>>740421265
I hope OP is still here, I like this story

Hurry op, my dick is getting soft

>>740421911
Me too anon, me too...

>>740421833
these days it's being gay, having blue hair, hating white people (especially males), and being a cuck

>>740417583
that seems pretty excessive considering they probably just use them to keep records and shit. Also that shouldn't be too much of a job to install it in the PCs, I could probably finish one upgrade in under five minutes as long as the cases aren't a pain in the ass to get into then maybe 10-15 minutes Really they should just upgrade to SSDs, I did where I work and the PCs boot up and access local files at least 3X as fast as a HDD

>>740421265
>Begin redoing all the computers
>Don't mention to company that I'm retarded
>Continue working all all the computers
>Get them done much quicker this time because I know how to do it now
>Finish in 2 hours tops
>Call office
>"Hey I'm done now, ran into a couple technical difficulties but I managed to overcome them"
>"Ok"
>He checks his system
>"I'm still seeing some computers undone, looks like you have some more"
>"Which ones? I did every one on the list."
>Proceeds to list every register in the entire store.
>I contemplate suicide
>I want you to picture target
>I want you to think of all the computers you see in that fucking store
>I had to do all of them
>I was supposed to leave 3 hours ago

cont

File: 1493782866854.jpg (389KB, 2048x1536px) Image search: [Google]

389KB, 2048x1536px

>>740421911
In the end somebody walks a dinosaur.
You're a retarded

>>740421265
> After 5 hours of undoing the work, I was tired as fuck
>Ask the chief If I can go home now. I'm not even asking to pay for my work anymore
>He said: "no. suck my hairy balls you little sissy faggot"
>So i got on my knees and start to suck him off real slow
>He started to breath heavy
>I grabbed his cock and started to suck on in too
>Chief then put out of his pocket 20$ and slapped me with it

cont

>>740422118
>I was supposed to leave 3 hours ago

$20 is $20

>>740421833
Just look on Facebook, your local grocery store, etc.

>>740420627
I don't think you understand what autism is

But keep going

>>740421265
Jesus, dude come on...

>>740422118
Dude you're being paid right? Unless this is below your usual earnings I'd say be happy to be working

>>740422261
>Faggot detected
>Not OP

>>740422118
Picture every computer in Target... like 8. At least where I'm from.

>>740422261
Post your fantasies somewhere else

>>740422261
not MY op!

>>740422296

This post gave me a little electric tingly feeling. Spooky stuff ya goober.

>>740422162
I don't even know how to respond to that

>>740422547
fucking summerfag

>>740422501
Why did it give you such a feeling?

File: max's pc.png (561KB, 480x640px) Image search: [Google]

561KB, 480x640px

>>740420627
>The wires inside are literally moms spaghetti
>with dust as the sauce
so like this?

>>740422118
>I was supposed to leave 3 hours ago
>Work shit temp job
>Cry about working
classic millennial

File: 1453165290960s.jpg (4KB, 250x188px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 250x188px

>>740422666
Fuck you satan I am of age to be on here

>>740422797
Working to live is better than living to work wouldn't you agree?

>>740422708

Because i know what you mean. There is a normal state out there, however relative the word normal is. And sometimes i peek at it, and spooks me that i dont live there.

>>740422950
Don't know about him but I agree.

>>740422845
anon learned about porn from google images

>>740422845
just hang yourself

>>740422742
Do you think the inside my Xbox one console looks like that? I bought it back in 2013 or so, never cleaned it

>>740423021
Wtf are you on about?

>>740423087
probably so

>>740422742
Cum on it and eat the dust.

File: 1496378334435.gif (2MB, 332x332px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 332x332px

>>740420627
why the fuck did they ask you to do it if you had no idea how to do it? Don't you have an IT department for that? If not they need to hire/contract one out because if everyonee did their own IT work nothing will get done.

>>740423168
sorry, but that's not my box

File: rRmRG1J.jpg (125KB, 1024x640px) Image search: [Google]

125KB, 1024x640px

>>740423054
but tomorrow is another surprise

>>740422742
Jesus Christ

>>740423189
they gave him instructions to follow in this part of the story >>740419574

File: a4j66N1_700b.jpg (20KB, 308x325px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 308x325px

>>740422162
Is actually a true story. Gonna warn you now, there's no big ending, just more shit

>Continue working on computers
>I'm determined to get this shit done
>Starting to get really sweaty in my button down in the warm environment
>quickly realize I forgot to put on deodorant this morning
>fuck
>grab deodorant from store
>put that shit on in the bathroom
>move on to the electronics department computers
>somewhat happy I can talk to other computer nerds
>see one guy back there
>slightly older guy back there (mid 30's maybe)
>talk with him about the job
>the difficulty of it
>why the company wants 16gb of ram on store computers in the first place, etc
>the guy is great.
>we make nerd jokes and talk nerd shit
>At one point I say
>"Yeah man, I'm opening these computers up and most of them are older than me"
>He looks me dead in the eye
>"I'm not impressed?"
>"W. . .what?"
>" 'These computers are older than me' . . .I'm not impressed"
>Autism kicks into maxidrive
>get very defensive
>"WELL IT'S TRUE"
>suddenly it's very quiet
>customers and employees are starting at me
>realize I screamed that
>silently turn away and go back to my computer

cont

>>740423253
>11 y/o
>optomist
>thinks arguing online will get somewhere

>>740422742
Aah, just like the computers out in a warehouse just use some canned air to blow it out and it'll be good to go, just do it outside unless you like pneumoconiosis

>>740423353
>Autism kicks into maxidrive
Tampon-level autism.

>>740423353
Sounds like you are having a very autistic day mate. I've had those days before. Shitty autistic sperg tard burger days. Those days are the worst. Cheer up anon, and also CONTINUE the story ;)

File: +.jpg (6KB, 219x187px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 219x187px

>>740423353

>>740423346
Yeah but they should have made sure he knew them before working on them. Giving computer hardware (especially RAM) to someone who knows little about pc buildiing/maintenance is like throwing it away. ESD could fry all the chips because he wont ground himself while working on it

File: 1478379893263.jpg (45KB, 534x504px) Image search: [Google]

45KB, 534x504px

>>740421265
>those last 2 lines

Lol you are basically a robot Asian who has been set on a manual labor task. Dumb nigger

>>740423375
There is this ancient greek technique where you visualize what positive events will happen but also what negative ones will occur. You then come up with solutions to those possible negative situations. Wish I could find it again, very thought provoking

>>740423800
ignoring your shitty post...
nice 00 dubs

>>740423627
What imaginary world do you live in? Have you ever seen the fuckwits working on server hardware under warranty? Dell, Lenovo, HP etc. all pay about $20 a job... That's a job, not per hour, per fucking job. You think they're getting NASA scientists replacing critical parts in servers and shit? Nope its the stoner down the road who will work for peanuts.

Fuck are you even on about cunt you have no fucking clue what you are talking about. Replacing RAM is literally monkey work.

>>740423627
Oh I don't know much about computer technology

>>740423846
wait why would you respond that you are ignoring it, just let it go

>>740422950
Different mindsets. Lazy people view everything as a union worker. Successful people vision goals and end-state. In the long term it makes a difference. Work hard play hard.

Being a wage slave is bad obviously.

>>740423904
>pop it out
>pop it in

>>740423904
So what do you do for a living then?

>>740424093
i run a successful anime body pillow manufacturing company. hbu?

>>740423904
No one would contract a temp agency to do anything but monkey work.

>>740424197
I run triathlon.

>>740424047
What do you mean by lazy people view everything as a union worker? I would agree with envisioning goals and end-state

File: images(3).jpg (11KB, 259x194px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 259x194px

>>740423627
>PC building
PC masterrace /g/tard detected
>earthing
Breaks faster means morr work means more money you idiot

Tl;Dr go install gentoo

>>740424197
I love anime body pillows, so you own the plant that manufactures them? Or do you manage it?
Just curious

>>740423353
C-cringe t-thread..?

>>740424197
I am a lead at a pallet recycling plant for a distribution warehouse. Jesus these sign captchas, who are they trying to keep out? ISIS?

>>740423810
I believe it's called "shit dildo-ing". You touched on it a little but I'll elaborate; essentially, when you feel the urge to poo, and the turd is sliding out your asshole, u suck it back in (continue doing this and u r effectively shit dildo-ing)

>>740423627
I found out about the job the day before. It was super last minute on everyone's part.

I know what I'm doing computer-wise, but that doesn't mean I know how to open a target POS system just by looking at it.

>>740423800
I actually am black

>I finally get around to finishing all the computers
>It's late in the evening now
>call into the office and report I'm done
>we do final checks
>"Alright, you're good to go, we're checking you out for the day"
>Thank god. Now I can go home
>Get ready to leave
>Car is in the shop, so I call an uber
>realize I changed cards recently so I have to update it on uber
>I forgot my new bank card on my desk at home
>don't carry cash
>lol gotta walk
>it's a 45 minute walk to my house
>it's also storming
>walk home through a mini monsoon
. . .
>finally get home after what seems like hours
>unload my pockets and prepare for the best shower of my life
>Feel extra lump in my back pocket
>it's the deodorant from earlier
>I forgot to pay for it

That's it.

Just a shitty day at work.

>>740424471
This comment was cringe.

>>740424412
i manage the plant

>>740423353
Wow the sexual tension! I hope u guys fucked

>>740424521
Go f-fuck y-your dad, f-faggot.

>>740424516
>I actually am black

it must be hard being naturally retarded

>>740424507
Not going to lie, I've done that. It stimulates the prostate nicely.

>>740424516
>I actually am black
>Feel extra lump in my back pocket
>it's the deodorant from earlier
>I forgot to pay for it
thanks OP i am lafin

>>740424507
i'm guessing one benefit is that there's no ripping since it's natural for it to be there

>>740424516
wonder what a 4chan SoL anime would be like. each episode goes through the day of 1, maybe 2, anon(s).
I imagine it would be a comfy show.

>>740424530
I am trying to picture my warehouse now, but with your cute anime pillows instead of misc. household items.
Sounds like a nice job

>>740422797
It's less about me being mad that I'm there and more that I have to explain to the agency what took me so long.

File: first-black-character-on-gta-first-mission-steal-a-bike[1].jpg (121KB, 735x535px) Image search: [Google]

121KB, 735x535px

>>740424516
>>740424685

Well this was anticlimactic. Thanks for wasting my time, OP.

>>740424719
Exactly, you ease into it and it never hurts (from what I've heard.. Have never actually tried it me self)

>>740424865
>Have never actually tried it me self
fucking pussy

>>740424856
I told you there would be no amazing ending 3 posts ago

File: sss.jpg (4KB, 300x164px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 300x164px

>>740424719
I love the way your mind works

Can someone screencap when he says about the dinosaur dance?

File: 1498361936276.jpg (9KB, 250x234px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 250x234px

>>740424516
all that to say you stole deodorant.
>I am actually black
kekd

>>740424925
Well you see, I would love to but I shit out of a colostomy bag... But thanks for kicking a man when he's down!

>>740424927
It broadened my awareness of the the computers of Target. Makes me want to look for those strange boxes the towers are in with no holes. Thank you for the story anon.

>>740424314
Ok, so maybe not all unions, some are pretty good. Others just exist to protect shit employees. There is no merit, just existing and doing drone-like tasks. A performer is rewarded the same as a turd employee. This embodies millennials because they feel they deserve it and feel no desire to excel.

ie millennials are communists

>>740425060
Wait what?

>>740424927
I enjoy autistic adventure stories, probably because I'm autistic myself.