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Im seriously considering becoming a superhero like making a suit

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 204
Thread images: 50

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Im seriously considering becoming a superhero like making a suit and gadgets and patroling the streets at night, am i autistic? Any tips?
>>
>>739597265
Yes.
Go ahead and try it anyway.
>>
>>739597265

Autistic nah, Just stupid.
>>
>>739597265
Jaden Smith is that you?
>>
Autistic too good for you
I'd say you're retarded
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>>739597265
Honestly there's a few ways it would end up

>caught by cops within two days
>Try to avoid cops by going to shadier neighborhood
>Get fucking shot.

I must admit it sounds tempting but I wouldn't go for it. You're probably at a point where there's not much to do with your life, and I can't guarantee it'll get better but don't go full batman bro.
>>
It's pretty gay anon.
>>
I wonder if there's any stories of this actually working once. I doubt it but it'd be interesting to hear of people who decided to go full batman.
>>
>>739597387
>>739597397
>>739597456
I guess im gonna do it, im on vacation but when im back ill keep you guys posted
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>>739597583
There have been people who have done it
>>
Is virginity your superpower?
>>
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>>739597265
Got a tip for ya. If you aint full of shit, do something that grabs a fuck ton of attention to yourself and get on tv or in the news somehow.... Ill save the post and be on the lookout
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>>739597822
Ill try anon, maybe ill have a logo ill use so they know it was me, im in Massachusetts so look there
>>
How tall are you?
How much do you weigh?
How much of that is muscle?
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>>739598093
5"7 i weigh 130 and id say most is muscle
>>
>>739598060
Godspeed OP, I suggest major vandalism... Also, find a way to use an airhorn or a megaphone.... Make your presence known
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>>739598093
That's also what I'm wondering about op.

It's fucking stupid but If he's serious I'm wondering about ideas. Physical fitness is basically a must. You'd have to be pretty much homeless, otherwise you're fucked from tracing. Gotta hide identity properly, get some good protective gear. Probably something to avoid any stab wounds and shit.

A logo would be good. No point in doing suicidal superhero shit if you won't get noticed. Put thought into it.

If you're going for lethal weapons, I hope you're not gonna make yourself into some weebstyle faggot. Guns are the way to go. Don't look too edgy.
>>
>>739598209
you are too small to fight crime
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>>739598413
Yeah I think he might be a bit too short, but as long as he's fit, it's not a deal breaker.

He should write up ideas for a fictional character to go on. Don't wanna come off like you've got no fucking reason. Have a greater cause and please don't do some corny anti-trump bullshit.
>>
You can be just like this guy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yg82gn9gLbc
>>
>>739597265
>am i autistic?
Yes
>Any tips
Zip ties, mace and possibly a taser. Lawyer up. Don't get stabbed.

Godspeed OP
>>
>>739598536
Motherfucker weighs 130....way too small for any kind of physical violence unless he's fighting women and children and even the women would be a challenge.
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>>739598370
Also, I'd be cautious to say it cause you never know what he's gonna do, but get a sidekick. It'll probably way easier if you're not working alone.
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>>739598370
I wanted to find a decent vpn before even posting a thread but i decided otherwise, im also very active regarless and work out alot so i think i could do some good
>>
>>739598413
Nah, ive got years of expirience in fighting in diffierent styles, im also very young and have some growing to do, im not full hight yet
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Whats your super name OP?
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>>739598711
Thats where the gadgets come in, ive been watching alot of youtube vids on wrist tazers and shit like that
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>>739598856
Havent thought of one
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>>739597265
what's your country

whats your supername

hows your costume
>>
>>739598924
I live in a pretty bad neighborhood in america, i dont have a name, and my costume will problably be standard but ill update it yearly
>>
>>739598719
How much money have you got?
Didn't think earlier, but that's probably critical.
Do you wanna kill people?
Any ideas for a cause to advertise, or just gonna be completely mysterious?
Will there be baneposting references?
Any ideas for costume design?

I'd say keep your function over your form.
>>
>>739598713
I agree, but itd have to be someone i trust alot
>>
>>739597265
make them suffer
>>
>>739599022
pls make your greeting card to the police a /b/ timestamp
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>>739599075
Not alot of money but plenty of access to material, my cause would just be criminals being dicks, and my design would problaby just be standard protective gear with metal plating
>>
>>739599075
I dont kill
>>
Try to keep 4chan updated in the process. Once you're ready, get on the news so I can look you up on the net. Somebody might want to screencap this thread as dumb as it may sound. It's probably just a passing idea for OP but I'm thinking about it.
>>
>>739598885
Lol okay sport. Good luck
>>
>>739599137
>>739599201
Thats a will do on both
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>>739599256
Good to hear.
That'd get you in even deeper shit.

>Only 14 posters
Yeah most of that's me I'd say. I've got a strange interest in what you've got going OP.

(No I'm not your fuckin sidekick lol)
>>
>>739597265
Fuck yes do it and keep posting your crime fighting adventures here
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>>739599407
I feel shame for saying it but we gotta have a screencap to post to r/4chan so I can fucking look it up somewhere.

Don't wanna waste time trying to find it so to whoever does post it up make this the title

>"anon becomes an superhero"
>>
>>739597265
News headline
Boy gets killed while pretending to be a super hero patrolling the streets at night.

Screeecap this.
>>
>>739597265
advise you watch KICK-ASS. there is your answer
>>
Are you going to have a theme, like autism boy or something, an animal
>>
>>739597265
If you are out of shape=forget it
Learn some basic hand to hand fighting
>>
Go for it, just try not be edgy.
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>>739599652
I have 5+ years of kenpo, im also a wrestler and boxer
>>
>>739597265

whats your backstory anon?
did you parents got murdered by a narc lord?
>>
>>739599749
That's cool and all but I think hand to hand may be overrated here, you're probably gonna be up against cops, who have guns, and a bunch of American civilians, who also have guns. Knives too.

I have a bit of a bad feeling about this.
>>
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>>739597265
>>
>>739599824
Well, my parents are alive and well, i guess i just wanna help, ever since i was little i was always the one to fight the bully and stand up for the little guy so i just want to help really
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>>739599983
why dont you just go be a cop? and a good one at that
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>>739597265
Can I persuade you to take a sandwich with you, sir?
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>>739599887
Im trying for weapons that are quieter than guns, im not gonna go weeb mode and run around with katanas but id try for quieter projectiles, problably c02 instead of gunpowder
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>>739600064
Im an enfp
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>>739600134
Yea thank you
>>
>>739597265
TrapBoy
Superpowers: cringe fagotery and shitposting.
Special move: sharpie in pooper
Story: his parents got baited by a reedit post. While he inserted a radio active sharpiesharpie
>>
>>739600196
just dont ger over your head anon, dont get with drug lords
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>>739600404
Im just trying for small things now, carjackings and such
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>>739600350
Anon
Power: over 9000 (pounds)
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>>739600477
That doesn't sound very heroic.
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>>739597265
this is one of the most autistic things i've ever heard
i support your endeavours
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>>739600546
>>739600546
ey he gotta start somewhere

and hes more brave than me, i would do shit without a gun over there in the usa
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>>739600657
would not*
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>>739600546
If i see something ill go for it but im not gonna be much help if i die on my first job
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>>739600657
Thanks anon
>>
What's your defense for when someone just shoots you
Or you get gangbanged by like 12 dudes
>>
>>739600798
That will happen anyway
AutismMan
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>>739600923
>o you wanna kill peop

heh
>>
>>739597265
ill chuck the autism awareness flag on half mast when u get shot

God speed OP
>>
>>739597583
There are several real life "Batman"s out there. Most of the time it's dudes dressed as ninjas. There are a few genuine masked vigilantes out there but it is pretty rare.
>>
>>739597583
There was a dude in Argentina who went full vigilante, "Mengano" was his name. I think he got caught stealing some time after appearing in the news tho
>>
Yes, you are guaranteed to get killed or arrested which will make you even more of a shitty loser and you likely won't accomplish anything.

If this is going to happen anyway the best thing to do is to just buy a gun and kill the first asshole you come across. First dude you see take up 2 parking spots, someone you see not tipping at a restaurant, someone with an infowars bumper sticker, ect.
>>
Trips should name this dude, i'd say "Fagman" its a pretty accurate name
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>>739601182
>execute half of usa
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>>739601182
Roleingo this
Kek will save you

Also you need a assistant.
Autism man and cringe boy
>>
>>739601257
Fag man and trap boy
>>
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>>739597265
> am i autistic? Any tips?
yes, severely. No tips sadly, just try and learn to live with it I guess.

HOWEVER

I do encourage the idea of becoming an superhero
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>>739597265
I'd say train in basic fighting and 3d print your suit like you're cosplaying or something and become a bootleg deadpool
>>
>>739597265
dude if you want to truly become famous start with making people happy

join some cause for kids in hospitals and tell you want to try out your own superhero to cheer them up and say shit like you're looking for a sidekick to kickstart your hero career
eventually move on to activities for a good cause like marathons and shit while still dressed in your suit

and once you locally made a name then start vigilante shit to truly become a 2 faced hero and blame the "night vigilante" as some homeless dude trying to cash in on your good reputation

bada bing bada boom "you" are famous
>>
>>739597265
You should really do this
But you have to do something huge that's gonna get you on national tv
Like sure start small but then work your way up

I mean you're gonna get shot at no matter what might as well go out like a badass

I 100% think you should do it
>>
>>739597265
Automatic weapon tear gas

Bullet proof vest and gas mask
>>
I encourage you to do it.
I did a simuler thing in my home town.
I became vary super famous, rich and got all the bitches I wanted.
I retired because there is no crime left to fight.
Good luck op
>>
>>739602162

nice
>>
>>739601182
"Shut up crime!"
>>
You wanna be a hero? Become a fucking fireman. You can actually save lives and if you die in the process people will respect you.
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>>739597265
>Have zip ties and cloth so you can tie hands and eyes.
>dont do anything illegal if youre dumb enough to leave evidence (meaning need any tips on how not to leave evidence)
>dont try giving dialogues r one liners like in movies. If you see a crime in progress and decide to stop it yourself, surprise is your biggest ally.

Ill cont if you want anymore advice from a veteran.
>>
>>739602847
What do you mean by vet
Have you once been a super hero
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>>739603101
Nah, military sergeant, but did my share of operations.
>>
>>739602847
Thanks, im saving dialouge for after theyre detained
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>>739597265
Eh why not, "/b/man, hero of the virgins"
Just dont go full Jacket and you should be OK
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>>739603361
Im thinking of incorperating fire into my costume
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>>739603437
dont
dont fucking start fires or you will be crucified by the media
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>>739603549
K
>>
>>739597265
You will die.
>>
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>>739603437
Yeah? Sounds good, dont know why you link to my post tho
Wait, by "dont go full Jacket" i meant dont put on an animal mask and massacre an entire building of Russian Gangbangers, not anything about your clothes
>>
>>739597265

Become an hero
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>>739603361
I can see /b/man doing a hero by cop
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>>739603886
kek
>>
>>739603784
Literally
>>
>>739603681
Fuck this guy if you want to make the news you better go full jacket

Like massacre all the Russians
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>>739597265
https://youtu.be/7bGkWWoqJVI
>>
>>739598060
I'm in New Hampshire, please keep us safe too lol
>>
>>739597265
Pro tip: crush 2 aluminium cans, fill with fibreglass, let it set then duct tape them together back to back, repeat until you have enough to line your outfit with them and you got protection against small arms fire.
Same shit isis used to use until they got their hands on real vests
>>
>>739604364
Thx for real tips and not being a faggot annon
>>
>>739597265

What you wrote
>Im seriously considering becoming a superhero
>like making a suit and gadgets
>and patroling the streets at night
>am i autistic?
>Any tips?

What I see
>I'm autistic
>I'm autistic
>I'm autistic
>am i autistic?
>Any tips?
>>
Op if you manage to get news time I will do the same
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>>739604748
Deal!
>>
>>739604869
So what kinda gadgets were you thinking?
>>
>>739604364
>>739604474
It also helps to stick a ceramic tile beteween the doubled up cans
>>
Op pl update.
What are your plans so far?
Clothing
Gadgets
Crime to fight
Name
Logo
And so on
>>
>>739605025
a couple fidget spinners on my utility belt
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>>739605025
Wrist mounted tazers, propane torches, stuff like that, stuff i can hide
>>
>>739605307
Not op
>>
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thinking as well, and i've dont hte autism test. not autistic :S

no but seriously, i live in sweden and i plan on going out with a bunch of my friends and beating up immigrants. it gonna be lit
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>>739605720
wait what the fuck did i just write? :////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
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brb gonna post my setup
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>>739605808
haahahahahah what the fucking is happening
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>>739605720
>thinking as well, and i've dont hte autism test. not autistic :S
>not autistic :S
you sure about that?
>>
>>739605513
>propane torches

What are those for?
>>
>>739605513
reminder, if you place firefighters lifes at risk, you are going to get slamed.
>>
>>739605513
Stay the fuck away from fire
That will not end well
And you won't be seen as a good guy
>>
>>739597265
Autismo, First edition, episode one.

War. War never changes. Chicago is in flames. Once the greatest city on Earth, the frigid windy city has been plagued by a relentless crime wave of unprecedented proportions. Murders and robberies are just another part and parcel of everyday life for many of her citizens.

Her elected officials have abandoned any attempt to improve upon the condition. In fact, the bloodshed is to the degree that the executive of the federal government has spoke of personally intervening within the city's law and order, but even Washington is being hamstrung by forces with the intent of further dividing our nation. On the plantation, these wretched souls in the heart of so-called Chiraq must plead for assistance, only to be granted an increase of food stamps and not law enforcement.

Henceforth, one young man has decided to take justice into his own hands. He dawned the cape out of virtue, but will his constitution be able to prevent his own corruption.

Autismo rise.

Browsing /pol/, Autismo searches for the Chicago police radio thread and the adventures of his fellow hero in law enforcement, Robert. Robert, like Autismo, has a staunch sense of justice, placing his life on the line in his fight against the notorious MALE BLACK. Viewing the latest thread, our caped crusader notices Robert is on vacation.

It is time! Finally the opportunity to make a name for himself and strike fear in the heart of violence. Time to confront MALE BLACK.

Wandering the streets, our hero notices some suspicious activity. Some movement in the distance, but what could it be? At this time of night surely nothing good. Approaching the rustling in the distance, a number of white, piercing eyes appear in the darkness. Unease sinks through our fledgling hero's conscious. Was this really the right path to choose?

They can smell fear.
>>
>>739606143
Slowly, those eyes are joined by the emerging white smiles of nefarious intent. Its MALE BLACK. But wait, there are many MALE BLACKs and they are approaching; approaching fast!

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Autismo is stunned. A sharp sensation flew through his being. Pain. What was this? Placing his hand on his chest, he examined the source of the feeling. Retrieving his hand from his custom leopard leotard, he notices the scarlet fluid shimmer in the moonlight. He had been shot without warning.

Our hero falls on the first evening. Shot by none other than MALE BLACK. Let this be a reminder of the dangers of niggerdom. When around blacks, never relax.
>>
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>>739597265
Autismo-man sneaking through tge streets then akwardly shrieking at wrong doers.. he requires no bat symbol simply scream "REEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and he will come
>>
>>739606053
To mount to my wrist in case someone pulls a gun, to disarm them you have to grab their wrist so if i built a trigger to activate in that motion their arm would be burnt and they wouldnt be able to re-arm themselves
>>
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>>739597265
I knew this guy in my school that used to draw this character (his alter ego) in this weeb costume, he used that drawing as his profile pic on facebook. He actually ended up making that costume and kept everyone up to date with pictures about it.

I've never been told but I assume he was autistic, not autistic enough to wear it in public tho, but I think its only because he never left the house. Ring a bell OP?

I do encourage you to do it tho, you would not be the hero we need, but the hero we deserve, may your autistic screeching bamboozle your foes and your manlet muscles create many bruises!
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>>739599585
gg op
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here is my "setup" :(
sorry for katana weeaboo shit. they're not mine i promise it's my brothers. have better swords at my other house
>>
>>739597265
Just become a cop. It's safer and more effective.
>>
>>739606470
Ok anon this is legit
>>
>>739606922
That has to be the single gayest post in /b/ ever
>>
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>>739606922
>>
>>739606922
oh shit nigga i lost my confidence in you
>>
>>739607151
feeling the cringe now. WHY DID I DO THIS
>>
>>739607149
>>739607151
>>739607222
Not op nice trips
>>
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>>739606922
Fear not, m'lady. Your hero has arrived.
>>
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>>739607330
hey, at least these swords aren't yours, they're your """"""brother's"""""""
>>
>>739606922
>asian weaponry
Trash meme shit. European swords are superior. I bet those wrapons arent even well made.
That being said, the only thing more autistic than owning eastern weapons is thinking that swords are effective crime fighting tools. You likely have no sword fighting experience, either. And that mask is just going to be uncomfortable, and will ubstruct your senses. Fucking retard. Kill your self.
>>
OP here

How do I look?

>pic related, its me
>>
>>739607501
Op didnt post this
>>
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>>739607528
>>
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>>739607573
That wasnt op
>>
>>739607222
Don't worry that's his brothers swords.
He got better ones at his real home
>>
Best costume
>>
READ THE THREAD THOSE ARENT OP'S IM NOT A WEEB HE RUINED MY THREAD
>>
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>>739597265
Watch this movie first for fucks sake
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>>739607790
I'm not OP btw
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>>739607707
You're retarded
>>
>>739607824
Is it a movie for ants?
>>
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>>739597265

the suit is the easiest part.

you need anyway some super special guns and secret equipment and shit
>>
>>739598614
Taser guns have serialized confetti that the cops use to trace the buyer

Im not shitting you
>>
>>739607889
Read the thread op didnt post that
>>
>>739607950
Thats why i wanna make my own
>>
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OP here, what do you guys think?

Name my band. I suggest the Spider with Two Backs
>>
>>739607950
This :(
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>>739607940

and replacement parts as well -- what if you loose or break your Super Special Sword ? what will you wield next night?
>>
>>739607951
You're literally too stupid to be allowed on the internet.
>>
>>739606783
Yeah bro you get so much pussy being a super hero...... Fucking kickass. Don't forget your BM42 balisong.
>>
OP should call himself: CloverMan
>>
>>739608017
Eight legged freaks
>>
>>739608088
Why? Op literally didnt post that
>>
>>739607950

what if you eat confetti and then take a dump and confetti gets floating around with your turd in the river, while you're patrolling the other side of Gotham Shitty?
>>
>>739608136
Child Lover Man
>>
>>739606922
Lmao fucking balisong trainer.

>let me distract you from your violence with these sweet flips.
>>
>>739606922

great.
but what if the bad guy has a pistol or a shotgun?
>>
>>739608017
Sexual intercourse in the missionary position for the sole purpose of recreation.
>>
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>>739606783

W U T ?????

she literally trashed his glasses!!!!

wtf
>>
>>739608017
OP didn't post this
>>
Don't do it. You will just look like a stupid douche. And an easily targetable punching bag. Look up the irl 'super heroes' who do this. They are literally just walking snitches who "call the cops when they see trouble" and "feed the homeless". The most faggotiest shit in the universe.
>>
>>739607824
It's super, in case you can't read text made by arranging individual carbon molecules
>>
I actually kicked this around for a while before I was married with a kid.

I'm 6ft 185 and have been playing ice hockey most of my life and have been in my share of tussles.

The logistics behind it are just retarded. You aren't going to be jumping off rooftops. And in reality being up high is the only way to survey what is happening in a large area. Otherwise you are just some cunt walking around in an outfit that will

>A. Get caught or
>B. Get shot

If you could somehow manager to decend quickly and safely from a high vantage point in a surprise attack you could have a chance.
>>
OP here

How about this one? I'm on a budget.
>>
>>739601692
>I do encourage the idea of becoming an superhero
Twice as autistic
>>
>>739600148
hey .22 subsonic ammunition is really quiet and cheap. Just make sure you've got a good aim cus that shit is weak :)
>>
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>>739608017
>>739608784
>>
>>739597265
I did it in high school for a little while, my short lived career was ended when I almost got shot by the cops. When they arrested me they thought I was on drugs. Thought about doing it again though, this time I could give less of a shit if I die.
>>
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>>739608956
of course you don't get it, summer is here after all
>>
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>>739608006
You could use a melee taser and not get caught but not a gun. Have fun making and testing one from scratch if you want a taser gun.
>>739608176
Nobody could pick up ALL the fucking tiny ass bitch ass confetti especially if your in a rush and the cops only need ONE LIL' PIECE M8.
>>
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>>
>>739608195
Kek
>>
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>>739609733

translator's note: "il Gallo" means "the chicken"
>>
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>>739609733
>>739609046
>>739609813
>>
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>>739597583
Well, there's the poop bandit

Give us a code word so we can add a filter and see how you're going
>>
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>>739608195

MODS!!!
>>
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>>739609920
>>
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>>739610059
>>
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>>
>>739609978
Super
>>
>>739606922
Pls don't be OP

But maybe you should invest on filters for your mask
>>
>>739610548
That wasnt op he ruined my thread tho
>>
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>>739610352
>>739610151
>>
>>739599983
One of your parents have to die, it's a rule
>>
Maybe but I don't think so
>>
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>>739610639
>>
>>739610669
No
>>
>>739610548
Op I'm with you just move on with your tread.
I'm disappointed this fucker's ruined it to
>>
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you have been given a gift, the gift of autism. use this gift to beat the shit out of SJWs
>>
>>739597265
I would say get fit be able to outrun them monkeys, get a gun so you can continue your crusade for justice and plan your escapes
Thread posts: 204
Thread images: 50


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