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Ask a bored femanon for advice. inb4 tits, sharpie, etc. If

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 294
Thread images: 29

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Ask a bored femanon for advice.

inb4 tits, sharpie, etc.

If you must have a mental image of me, I'm 33, 32-26-35 with long hair. That's all you're getting.

Ask away and I'll do my best.
>>
>>739235136
How do I get a girl who I think likes me? We have known eachother for like 2 yrs and we send eachother porn and do some odd shit
>>
>>739235136
Will you be my girlfriend
>>
explain me that 32-26-35
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>>739235136
Tits or gtfo. I don't make the rules, they are here to protect us.
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>>739235571
Body measurements fool
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>>739235571
Bust waist hip
>>
How do I fuck my female coworkers?
>>
>>739235596
>>739235650
I thought of that myself but with those numbers she must be 12 or something
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>>739235136
>That's all you're getting.
ok
sage
>>
>>739235689
dick in pussy
>>
>>739235281
By sending porn and all that, you've broken the boundary of being sexual with each other and I would assume she feels comfortable about sex with you so I think she likes you too. Do you guys hang out together? Why not message her and ask if she'd like to hang out with you alone some time, and take it from there? You can try starting to hang out alone and see how things go. If you're not sure of the situation take things slowly and see how she reacts - does she reach in to talk to you, does she touch you at all, does she smile at you often? If you are talking to her and you put your hand on her shoulder does she pull away or not? Just take it slow, but it has to start somewhere, so just ask her if she'd like to hang out with you, away from other people, and take her somewhere where both of you can do something you like but also have the opportunity to get to know each other.
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>>739235136
Prove it cunt
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>>739235767
I doubt a 12 year old has a 26 inch waist lmao
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>>739235397
Sorry, that's a no.
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>>739235587
My favourite type of grape is white seedless.
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>>739235972
I'm wealthy and attractive though
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>>739235689
Are they actually interested in you?
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>>739235136
>32-26-35
Them are some tiny tits.
>>
>>739235960
I forgot that you fat americans are too stupid to use the normal metric system all non-retarded people use.
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>>739235767
Those are my genuine measurements, in inches.
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>>739235958
I actually have a cunt.
>>
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Rules are rules for a reason, /b/itch

TITS or GTFO!

>sage
>>
>>739236012
I prefer partners for their personality. Sorry dude/dudette.
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>>739236133
They sure are. But at least I don't have to worry about sagginess.
>>
Bitch, you come on the 4chins and dont wanna follow the rules?

> tits
> GTFO

Pick one.
>>
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You know the rules, bitch. Tits or sage
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>>739236283
How do you know our personalities aren't compatible? I'm also 24 so it makes you look like a straight up pimp for snagging a fit younger dude
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>>739236081
One of them does. Just trying to figure out a good way to get further with her,
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>>739236133
32 is the under bust measurement, you fucking retard. Femanon needs to provide cup size with timestamp.
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>>739235136
My question for you is. Do you know why as a femanon , you must show your tits with a time stamp?
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>>739236265
I'm not expecting any special treatment for being a girl anymore than I expect special treatment irl for being a girl. I just thought perhaps somebody wanted advice from a female perspective, and I'm also bored and stuck in bed ill. Posting my boobs would not actually be degrading for me, because I think my boobs are pretty nice.
>>
How do i overcome my social anxiety and ask this chick out? Also where should i take her?
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>>739236447
I'm not really into younger guys.
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>>739236492
Ask her out so you can get to know her?
>>
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>>739236504
No it's not, numbnuts.
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>>739236656
Stop feeding the troll.
>>
Hooked up with a girl last week
Things went pretty well
She hasn't text me in a few days
She just not that into me, too busy with life, or could she be waiting for me to hit her up first?
How do I tell?
What do I say to obtain this knowledge?
>>
>>739236603
>my boobs are pretty nice.
we'll be the judges of that
>>
>>739236672
GODDAMNIT ITS ALWAYS SOMETHING WITH YOU we're breaking up.
>>
>>739236747
I dont care if its a troll, i need answers

Also sage goes in all fields
>>
>>739235136
>no tits

guess you should GTFO then

>mfw these newfags are feeding this attention-whore attention
>mfw I have no face
>>
>>739235136
Why do women seek attention from random men?
>>
>>739236603
Proof of cup size. Also, how tall are you? The reason why I ask is that your measurements seem to put you a little bottom heavy. I am white but I love a nice round ass.
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>>739236656
If you're not up for asking her face to face, you can do it by text message or messenger or something. You can take her somewhere where you know both of you would enjoy it, but a place that also gives you the opportunity to talk. You could plan a picnic at a park, or go to a bar for a drink, go to a coffee place for coffee/breakfast, take her out to lunch or dinner (lunch will be more casual and probably better for a first date as there'll be less expectations). You could go out for a walk, take a couple of beers or a bottle of wine to a beach and watch a sunset, go for a drive, go watch a band then have drinks/food afterward, if one of you has a dog take it out for a walk, do a sight seeing tour in your city that neither of you has done before.
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>>739235136
Sir you know the rules
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>>739236969
nice double 69s
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>>739235136
>long hair.

OMG. OMG. Talk to me about your long hair.

Slowly. Omit no detail. Can I make you some tea and rub your feet while you talk?
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>>739236842
You're the one who said you've broken the naked pics barrier with her?
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I don't have any questions for you but I drew a clown
>>
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>>739235136
tits or gtfo
>>
>>739235136
>That's all you're getting

sage
>>
>>739237129
fuck OP, this thread is now about you
I like your work. do you have any other clown pics?
>>
>>739236780
Why haven't you messaged her? She's probably waiting on you to message. This sort of thing is always so awkward! We never know whether to message first either. You could just message her a 'hey, how's it going?' and see what happens from there. If she doesn't reply, then you know things are not going to go anywhere, and just don't bother messaging again. The fact she hasn't messaged you doesn't necessarily mean she's not interested. A lot of the time girls will wait on the guy to message first. So just give it a shot and send her a message.
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>>739236829
Another heart broken...
>>
>>739235136 (OP)
>long hair.

OMG. OMG. Talk to me about your long hair.

Slowly. Omit no detail. Can I make you some tea and rub your feet while you talk?
>>
>>739236969
I'm not sure how to answer this tbh, as I personally do not seek attention from random men. I will assume that it comes from a lack of self-confidence and trying to get some form of validation that you are pretty/sexy.
I don't really have much to say about this, I'm sorry.
>>
>>739235136

Long hair? Let me brush your hair and melt your butter.
>>
>>739235136
What impression would it give a potential person of interest if I told them that I spent a few years out of school and work to help care for a disabled family member?
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>>739236997
I'm 5' 5".
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>>739237450
>hey femanon here
>I personally do not seek attention from random men

the b8 is strong with this one
>>
>>739237084
My long hair is long... and it's hairy...
I dislike tea, so you'll have to make me coffee instead.
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>>739235136
>long hair

OMG. Let me light some rose incense and entertain you.
>>
>>739237281
I'll ask a question then how do I get a 33 year old with long hair and the body measurements of 32-26-35 to fall in love with me and realize that ever since the day we met we were destined to be together forever
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>>739237571

Coffee, yes, I have excellent coffee. Hair is often hairy. Sit back. Relax. Talk to me.
>>
>>739237129
Cool, thanks.
>>
>>739237206
Hmm didn't think of that.
So if I message her and she doesn't reply I should just move on?
Is there a way I can read into the subtext of whatever she replies and find out what she's actually meaning?
I don't do well with this social crap. When things get physical I'm golden, it's just getting back to that stage that's a problem.
>>
>>739237498
Thanks. Bra size? I'm forming a mental image for masurbational purposes.
>>
Why the fuck would anyone want advice from a retarded cumslut woman? and you're even worse you post on /b/, you're the lowest tier of woman.

Show your tits and vag and shut the fuck up, other then that there's nothing to discuss cunt
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>>739237470
That would tell me that you're a very caring person.
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>>739237026
Yeah im doing it by text message. Problem is i get really nervous around her and being somewhere public makes it worse, i feel like im being watched all the time, i cant walk, i cant think, i cant speak. Shell probably think im fucking reatrded, what do op? Also, where would you like to be taken to?
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>>739237567
Ahahaha, yes I get your point. Me saying I'm a femanon in my post was not to get attention but just to say that I'm offering up advice from a female perspective if anybody wants that.
>>
>>739237709
*masturbational
>>
>>739237617
Hmm... I don't know.
>>
>>739235571
kek
>>
What's more important, length or girth?
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>>739237691
>when things get physical i'm golden
Settle down big boy
>>
>>739237853
you should probably read the rules one day

if you want to offer advice from a female perspective, you have to prove you're female. if you just want to offer advice, you don't need to state your gender.

>sage
>>
>>739237691
You can judge based on the time she takes to respond, for example. The longer she takes to reply, the less interested she is, generally.
And as far as what she says, I wouldn't try to read some deep meaning into what she says - just take it for what it is. If you message her a 'hey, how's it going', things may develop into a conversation and you two might meet up again. It might go to a conversation that turns awkward and things just go to nothing and that'll be the end of it. She might never respond, and that'll be the end of it - don't bother her again because if she was interested, she'd reply. But there's no harm in messaging to find out.
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>>739237976
Girth. Women prefer a fat dick to a long needle like pokey dick. We like to be stretched, not stabbed.
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>>739237976
This. And is 6 inches adequate? I know its supposedly above average but it looks small on my 6'2, stout frame :/
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>>739237719
You sound like you need a blow job.
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>>739238062
I'm serious. Never had a complaint in the bedroom but I've been called socially retarded on several occasions.
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>>739238128
This really helped. Thanks. I'll give it a shot tomorrow at a more reasonable time...kind of late rn.
>>
>>739235136
a french girl from Quebec added me on facebook does she want the D? there is a language barrier
>>
Do you have any fetishes? do you do anal? Would you let someone lick your ass?
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>>739237819
It's okay to be nervous, everybody is to a certain degree. Chances are she'll be nervous too. Some people are better at hiding it than others. Maybe you could imagine yourself on the date and visualize how things might go beforehand, to try and calm yourself. Think of potential scenarios, things you might say, possible conversations, and get yourself mentally prepared.
For a first date, I like going to a quietish bar. Just having a beer and talking.
>>
Post vocaroo so we know youre actually a femanon
>>
>>739238492
this
>>
>>739237976
I think both are equally important, tbh. It's not good to be short and wide, and it's not good to be long and thin. There's a sweet spot in the middle. Also, if you want to do anal and you're too wide, it's just not going to happen.
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>>739238225
Sounds fine to me.
>>
>>im a femanon
yea? well i dont give a shit
>>no tits boys
its not your choice
tits or gtfo you vile heathen and go flick the bean on reddit
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>>739238357
I'm glad I could help :)
>>
>>739238390
Hard to tell. What are your public pictures like? Do you show your body?
>>
>>739238401
Yes, yes, yes.
>>
>>739238390
we tried to talk but we dont understand each other but she gave me a smile face
>>
>>739238874
What are your fetishes?
>>
>>739235136
I am much taller than a woman I am trying to date, we have a lot in common, but I know she's holding out on me because she's obsessed with height and thinks I should be taller than 6'0. I feel quite frustrated that such a possibly good relationship is being wasted because of something I can't control. Any way to get over this somehow?
>>
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>>739238593
Obey the rules
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>>739238492
http://vocaroo.com/i/s06lmx88cdHZ
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>>739238928
Talk to her? But if shes worried about shit like that then shes prob not worth your time and efford
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>>739238923
Hahah, I'd rather not say.
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>>739238810
Only got like two pics on myself on facebook but i'm more healthy then her. They are alright just you're basic outside selfies. we are both 6/10 shes just more heavy.
>>
>>739238928
I'm not sure I'd want to date someone if they were holding back on dating me for a physical thing I had no control over. That just seems really shallow.
>>
>>739238492
Traps do vocaroo too and they can sound better than some girls. This is no final results. Its tits or gtfo. or if you are a trap dick or gtfo. Take your pick but the old rules are still here for a reason
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>>739239193
a cute
>>
>>739239315
>>739238810
i'm the only English guy on her friends list
>>
>>739239277
Its a fucking anonymous message board on the internet, do make yourself beg op, what are your fetishes?
>>
>>739235136
What are some small things women care about in relation to men than most men don't know/notice? What matters the most?
>>
>>739239544
Don't*
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>>739239277
Come on youre anonymous, let loose :)
I highly doubt they are worse than most if the other shit posted here
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>>739239277
it's ss
>>
>>739239444
Trips have spoken op
>>
>>739235136
How much would you charge to cuddle through the night with a fat guy?
>>
>>739235136
why do girls message me first then ignore me as soon as i reply?
>>
>>739239193
lol this is from a thread last week
>>
>>739239569
That's a very interesting question. I've never really thought about it before.
I care about the way men react to things related to women, which gives me an idea about how much they respect women.
It's nice to get random text messages from a guy simply to know that he's thinking of you and made the effort to contact you.
When a guy makes an effort about his appearance/clothes, but there's no need to go overboard
Small gestures like holding open the door
If you're not uncomfortable to hold my handbag while I go use the loo ;)
Your shoes
Your language/slang
How quickly you reply to messages

I'm not sure if that answers your question.
>>
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>>739239521
So should I move forwards? she gave me a haha lolll for this meme
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>>739240208
Why would you send her that you autist?
>>
>>739240167
How quick i reply to messages?
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>>739239927
I think fat guys are sexy, to a certain point. As long as you're not too fat. I'll happily kiss your big belly.
>>
>>739240021
I just recorded that now.
>>
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how do i make my GF not mad at me. we where planning a trip and i was tired and kinda started ragging on her for being an anxiety filled mess. she bailed on our trip and drove 3 states over to be with family. she hasnt returned calls for a week now. sends me a text now and then. says shell call me later but shes with family and wants space rn. thanks femanon
>>
>>739240208
I'm a sad guy and having a french girl to cuddle with sounds like a dream she poked me back two times
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>>739240021
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1XZSucOXU5P
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>>739240326
Tf op? Kiss your big belly?
>>
>>739240008
What do they message and what do you reply?
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>>739240264
I was robbed when i posted it
>>
>>739240500
OH WE HAVE A KIWI

>also this vocaroo is from a thread last week
>>
>>739235945
(1 hour late reply) Yeah, She has grabbed my dick a few times, once in public. When shes feeling sad or hurt she talks about it with me, she always calls me a dumb faggot too, in a joking way. I think we are comfortable with eachother at this point
>>
>>739235136
Have you ever had any sexual encounters with more than one guy? How did they go? What did you get into?
>>
Wtf is wrong with /b/. I scanned this thread for tits and found none. There should have been no replies.
>>
>>739240208
Why did you send her that? That just makes the conversation awkward. I'm not sure what conversation you can have because of the language barrier, but I doubt that picture's gonna help.
>>
>>739240500
What the heck is this contraption called again? A cold keep? No thsts not right..
>>
>>739240456
She can't control her anxiety so you had no right to get angry with her about it, and understandably she's hurt that you. Have you apologized? I assume that she's waiting for that to happen.
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>>739240761
I believe its a freezing bucket
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>>739240761
Esky m8
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>>739240611
I'm not a kiwi.
>>
>>739240630
Not femanon here, just your friendly chad. Girl don't mind if you come on strong if they like you. They mind if you ur a creep and ugly. Nobody ever heard a girl complain about a guy she liked coming on strong. You could literally straight up text at this point possibly. When we gonna fuck?
>>
You're a cunt.

:)
>>
>>739235136
How do i get past gordon in the adventures of Bayou Billy?
>>
>>739240641
Nope.
>>
>>739240922
alright sure whatever you say

but did you by any chance go on bus tour around europe at some point because you sound really familiar
>>
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JUST SHOW US YOUR DAMN TITS
>>
>>739240962
You need to poke his eyes with a cucumber.
>>
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>>739240832
yeah i apologized said she forgives me but i can tell shes still mad. what can i say i feel like a dick. shes at least sent me some memes. whatever thats worth fml
>>
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WHERE ARE THE TITTIES?!
REEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>739241016
I've never been on a bus tour round Europe, sorry to disappoint!
>>
I am a fairly attractive guy but I always date women that are significantly less attractive than me.

What do attractive girls generally think when they see a handsome dude with a less attractive girl? Do they look down upon the guy?
>>
>>739241154
dont you fucking lie to me taryn I know it's you

how's your dog these days?
>>
>>739236603
It's very simple, love. Tits or GTFO. Don't say your a girl or try to provide a female perspective if you're not willing to do this simple thing.
>>
>>739235136
What are your fetishes?
>>
>>739241091
That's good that you apologized. And it's a good sign that she sent you memes, but I imagine she's still hurt by what happened. I wouldn't be too worried about things, tbh. Keep messaging her, but not in a questioning way, more like, in the morning text her a 'Hope you have a good day', and in the evening send a 'Hey, what did you get up to today?' so she knows that you care about what she's doing. That will mean a lot to her and she's more likely to respond to that than something like, "hey why aren't you texting?" or "Hey how are you?"
>>
>>739236954
This^^^
>>
>>739241237
she sounds like shes from the south. Keep off the drugs
>>
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>>739235136
I have a sibling who is significantly younger than me that I can't stand.
I have hated him since the day he was born, and a good while before it.

I have been nothing but an asshole to him his entire life, though the past few years I've been slightly less of an asshole.
He has been afraid of fucking everything (he was afraid a hill a few miles from our house growing up was a volcano for instance; this fear carried for years), never been able to find friends, is obscenely proficient with mechanical objects, but...I don't know.
The guy may be a little autistic. That's what our mother assumed. It has gotten to the point where even our mother has stated, hopefully out of earshot, that she just plain can't stand him.
The thing is, the kid is on anti-depressants. He's already fucking depressed, and it's most likely at least partially if not entirely my fault.

I...I don't know why. But that just kills me.
And I want to fix it, but I'm not the kids father and he needs one, as well as a friend, badly. I can't be his father, and I REEEEAAAALLY don't want to be his friend. He's a functional person aside from being very single minded and depressed as fuck.

What do?
Suck it up and be his friend?
Find him a friend? How?
I've been doing my damnedest to help him from the shadows. But I refuse to act as his father.
It's funny, he's almost an exact depiction of a stereotypical /k/ommando, but he's an underageb& and on top of that I'd never wish the fate of us motherfuckers doomed to lurk here for eternity on anyone.
>>
>>739240326
Ha, speaking of bellies...
One time I was hitting it off with this girl, we were both laid out on our backs on the hood of her car... the first move I made was to rub her belly. Very nicely, not trying to call attention to it, was just the place I chose to touch her...was that weird? What would you have done?
>>
>>739241224
Beauty is such a subjective thing! This is such a difficult question to answer. The guy I think is the hottest person in the world, my mother thinks is ugly. If I see a super hot guy with a girl I consider ugly, I think to myself that in his eyes, she must be beautiful, though I do wonder a little, but I also say to myself that attraction is more than just about what a person looks like - personality and character is the most important thing at the end of the day.
>>
>>739241450
yeah south island

actually heading over there soon, wanna fuck OP?
>>
>>739239192
needs more jpeg
>>
I have been fucking a girl with a boyfriend for a year. I just met this other chick who I am actually interested in. I was upfront about this situation to her and she said she would never trust me. Should I move on or is this potentially salvageable? Before I told her there was chemistry.
>>
>>739241370
thanks good advice.
>>
>>739237853
What part of this are you not understanding? If you want to give a "female" perspective on things, you have to prove you're a female. These guys see nudity about twice a fucking second. No one cares that you have tits, but some would actually like to know that they are getting advice from a real woman. If you can't understand this concept, YOU ARE VASTLY TOO STUPID TO BE GIVING ADVICE TO ANYONE.
>>
>>739241583
I wouldn't like a guy to rub my belly because I'm very conscious about my weight and I hate my belly! But it depends on the person.
>>
>>739241823
>not op
salvageable if she's actually into you.

You're not the one going behind someones back, the girl is. you were honest about the situation with her, and always will be.

make sure you frame it in a 'I respect your rights to choose here, I just felt you should be aware of the whole situation before you got involved at all, if my past is a dealbreaker I can understand' or some shit.
>>
>>739241823
I wouldn't trust you either. You're fucking a girl who has a boyfriend, that says to me that don't have very strong morals. I'd say this one's not salvageable and if you want to have a proper relationship you need to drop the girl you're messing around with.
>>
>>739241942
Yeah I mean tbh idgaf about the tits or gtfo thing because it's over ten years old but you should probe you have a vagina. Just literally post your breasts with a timestamp and a lot of people would be more comfortable getting advice from you.
>>
>>739241527
That's a tough situation. Would your brother even want you as a friend considering your past? How were you planning to help? Why did you hate him in the first place?
>>
>>739235136
Tits or gtfo.
The whole point of this board is to be anonymoose, but here you fucking come and self-identify, breaking all anonymity. So, if your so godamn special that you must post your gender, than you most post proof of tits, or gtfo. Its to make you; A) Never come here again because your obviously new, or B) Show it.
That, and hell, we all like tits.
>>
>>739240659
Fucking newfags, man. No respect for the rules.
>>
>>739240668
But why would a french speaking person add an English speaking person on their fb? there is also something wrong with her neck..some sort of dent
>>
>>739242022
Yeah that's exactly what I did. I think she's playing a game so I'm going to wait to see if she contacts me and if she doesn't within a week or two then I'll just fuhget abahd it.
>>
>>739240926
Yeah well, I don't consider myself attractive, we met through memes and call eachother nigger. She talks to me alot, and always calls me either on Discord or Skype. It's very interesting to say
>>
>>739241224
ehy would you settle for less?
>>
Op, if I have known girl and probably missed countless chances to ask her out over the past 4 years... Would you consider it too late to ask her out? She still gives vibes of being interested but I can never be sure
>>
>>739242202
I don't know. He's like a fuckin' puppy; it's part of the reason I feel for him. He just doesn't give a shit about who dislikes him, he just doesn't shut up and no matter how many times he's told "look, my opinion shouldn't matter to you, go find someone who knows what they're talking about before you ask for advice" he just keeps asking. Like I said, we think he's a little autistic.
So I have no idea I guess.

I was planning on just doing shit with him, and being a little less of an asshole. I just don't want to deal with my mother drowning me with "I TOLD YOU YOU LOVED HIM!!!!!!:):):):):):)" ing like she always does whenever I do anything nice.
Yet another "that's part of the reason I have been an asshole"

And I hated him because he got everything he ever asked for. Got out of schoolwork (we were homeschooled), chores, paying for shit, trouble. He could do no wrong back in the day. I got my ass chucked aside and shuffled off to one class after the next, browbeat over whatever grades I got and if they dipped below an A I had to redo them.
I was also always bitter because the only interactions they had with our father (before he left) were good or just plain mediocre whereas I was around for our father chasing us with shit and beating our mother up, and having shit thrown at my head.
>>
>>739242862
I don't think it's too late if she still seems interested. Just go for it :)
>>
>>739242955
Gah that's the problem though, I'm quite young and haven't had a girlfriend, I don't know what to look for when seeing if someone likes me or is just being friendly, it seems to be borderline imo
>>
>>739242748
you've pulled the only trick you have really, just stick to your guns and see how it goes.

you'll have to drop the fuckbuddy if she agrees to be with you of course, but its not like you were exclusive prior to this so she cant complain that much about your past.
>>
>>739242955
To extend, I just feel like I could always just be pushing the dream of us being together and therefore take everything she does as her being interested when that could easily not be the case... I know this isn't easy for you to answer if there even is anything but it's nice to finally vent
>>
>>739235136
Do you like having your ass eaten? If yes, what do you like about it?

Do you like sucking dick? If yes, what do you like about it?
>>
>>
>>739243058
Only one way to know for sure faggot. Ask her out before she starts fucking a chad and they both laugh at how much of a pussy you are.
>>
How would you go about proving that every finite dimensional normed vector space is complete ?
>>
So I'm a little older. I'm 30. Married with a bun in the oven.

Saturday afternoon I randomly ran into an ex from high school. We talked and decided to get lunch to catch up. I didn't even think this was a big deal. We were friends for a little after we broke up.

So she gets hammered at this lunch and starts coming onto me hard. Tells me she wants to fuck back at her place. I leave. Tell my wife about it. Wife flips out because I had lunch with my ex, bitch even did the get the fuck out of my house shit.

She's gonna snap out of this right? I mean, I don't feel like I did anything wrong. She's very preggo and emotional.
>>
tits or gtfo

your thread would be empty if you hadn't renounced your anonymity by sexing yourself . sage .
>>
>>739243477
Perfection.
>>
>>739243477
Is that a nipple or a spider bite?
>>
>>739236133
Yummy! Big fucking hips by comparison though.
>>
>>739243477
You look great!
>>
>>739243679
Kek
>>
>>739243477
Finally
>>
>>739243170
Yeah I will. I was dumb for even telling her this. Just gonna omit it next time.
>>
>>739242796
I need advice from here.
>>
>>739243477
>IMG-20151111
>2015-11-11

nice recent pic you've got there
>>
>>739243660
>>739243679
>>739243750


Chill faggots. No timestamp.
>>
>>739243838
Get in line nigger im still awaiting mine!
>>
>>739243832
you were, but your stupidity came from a good place of actually wanting to be honest with her.

we all have to learn that at least once.
>>
>>739236672
Older guy here. Not that I exactly expect to pull on /b/.

I do like me some itty bitties though, especially on a woman over thirty. Probably still as perky as a decade ago.
>>
>>739243477
Very nice. Could you post a a picture of your waist/hips. Doesnt even have to be nude. I love the modest cup size + big hips combo hnnnnngg
>>
>>739243477
i accidentally posted a pic in this thread and people thought it was OP KEK
>>
>>739242855
I got to have somebody I can have a fucking conversation with that's just levelheaded, without games, without bullshit. Every single girl on my level I have dated has been a headache. I'm done with them. They tend to be shit human beings. This girl is cute enough, grateful for me and for that I love her. I cum harder and longer and the sex is better. I feel much more comfortable pounding her out, hot girls just bring a whole bunch of annoyances and pressure and fuck that I don't want to live my life that way.
>>
>>739243190
The thing is that you won't know until you take the plunge. Are you going to wonder forever or just take the risk and ask her out? It doesn't even have to technically be a date. It can just be you and her hanging out.
>>
>>739237206
"Hey, how's it going" is a poor opening gambit.

Ask her if she likes something instead, a band, an actor/actress/TV series etc. Far more likely to get an answer to a proper question.

Back a couple decades when I was a kid, I used to have a bit of banter and tickle girls I was interested in, without trying to cop a feel. Allows you to build up physical contact in stages, and appear innocent with it.

Thems was good times though. Probably land up in the pen for rape nowadays for touching a femanon without prior consent.

Glad I'm not a teen and I half pity my son, who's just turned 11.
>>
>>739243477
OP here. I didn't post this pic.
>>
>>739243312
Never had that done but would go for it.
Yes, I like everything about it, especially swallowing and have you grab my hair viciously and moan in pleasure.
>>
>>739243567
Que?
>>
how long is your dick OP?
>>
>>739244835
this
>>
>>739237617
Bloody women. If you don't know how to steal your own heart how are you going to tell a man what you want? It's almost as bad as being an uninformed virgin on their first time!
>>
>>739235136
Tinder advice?
>>
>>739243600
How would you feel if your wife told you that she ran into an ex of hers and they had lunch together and he got drunk and came on to her and said he wanted them to fuck at his place?
I doubt you'd be too happy about it.
I understand that for you it was just a catch up and that's all it was, but you need to make your wife understand that too. Maybe she has insecurity issues that you don't know about, and this has triggered them. Reassure her that it meant nothing to you and you wouldn't do anything with anybody else. But also think about it from her perspective if it were her meeting an ex who said he wanted to fuck her, and consider how that would make you feel.
>>
>>739244791
Lol i hope so much this isnt OP
>>
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>>
>>739243978
Yeah, they are still perky, I must admit.
>>
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>>739244617
Tickle girls you were interested in?
>>
>>739240167
Why are you awake so early/late?
>>
>>739236011
Never mind guys. She's retarded. White grapes are terrible and you should feel bad!
>>
Whats the most effective way to find a girl who will be your fuck buddy? Like no strings attached, or friends with benefits?
>>
how baby are borns OP? and why are you an attention whore?
>>
>>739245640
My sleeping pattern is shit.
>>
>>739245792
Go to a bar or club or join tinder I guess?
>>
What's your preferred dick size?
>>
My brother broke a TV. How do I hide it?
>>
>>739245843
Stork bring babby.
I'm bored so I'm offering up advice but you just wanna insult me instead homeboy.
>>
what's your favorite anime opening OP?
>>
>>739246077
Throw it out and buy a new one that looks just like it.
>>
>>739245118
I guess I should have put forward that we are waaaaaaaaaaaaay past this stuff. If it was a post college ex, sure, maybe. But, we hung out with her ex together and I even became friends with the guy. We have a level of trust that is extremely developed, or so I thought. I thought this was something that we could both just laugh at. Both of us are so beyond high school as people that the idea of recreating some young love bullshit is a pathetic joke... we've laughed at our friends who engage in that type of looking back tourist in your own youth bullshit before.

Idk, I'll do what you say if it comes to it, I dont see any other way, but I feel I shouldn't have to. Now I'm doubting a big part of what I thought was a level of comfort with her.
>>
>>739246164
Cowboy Bebop probably
>>
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>>739246164
Probably Rose of Versailles.
>>
>>739243958
Yeah I got you, thanks playboy.
>>
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>>739246435
> Doesn't like Jojo
GTFO
>>
>>739245850
Makes two of us.
>>
>>739246238
Ah, that makes a difference then. If you have that level of comfort then this is strange reaction. You could put it down to her being emotional because she's pregnant, much as I hate attributing things to 'female hormones'. I understand how this makes you doubt the level of comfort that you had with her.
In the past has it always been her exes that you interacted with? Is this the first time that she is faced with a situation involving an ex of yours? If yes, then perhaps although she has been given by you that level of comfort with her exes, she cannot provide that same level for your exes, and you've just come to realize that now. If she has already had to deal with you and an ex, what was her reaction then? How different is her reaction now?
What was her mood when you told her about the meeting with your ex?
I'm not too sure what to say about the whole thing tbh. It sounds like you two have a strong relationship built on big trust, but this has thrown a spanner in the works because you really weren't expecting the reaction that you got. If you are so uncomfortable with the way she reacted it may be worth discussing the issue, when she is in a good mood and not having had a bad day or something. Her reaction to get out of house was certainly an extreme one, especially if you were previously expected to be cool with her ex, although it's quite different for you two to hang out together with her ex than for her to hang out solo with her ex, as you did with yours. I assume she wouldn't have been so mad if it had been the three of you hanging out rather than just you and her.
>>
>>739246238
Pregnancy makes women worse than usual. They feel super unattractive and often sexy is the last thing they feel.

So it's a double dose of paranoia with her thinking that in your shoes any hole would be a goal atm, and the fact it's an ex you've boned many times before, so it would be easier to slip into than normal infidelity.

Just stick to the facts, explain that you didn't want to be with her then or now, and a fuck for old times sake isn't something you'd ever do, whether your missus is preggers or not.

Best of luck bro! Pregnancy is a goddamn life ruining period for most couples. For me personally the end result was worth it. My boy is goddamn awesome.
>>
I'm a major music festival goer. I have attended probably 40+ festivals since I was 18. I'm 28 now and man I'm starting to feel old for this shit. Do I quit or do it for another year or two? I love getting fucked up to great music but neeeeever want to be that old desperate burnt out loser.
>>
Ask a 60 yr old Ohio man anything

inb4 enlarged prostate or gtfo
>>
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>>739237853
Are you sexist? Men are not capable of giving intelligent advice in a sensitive way?

Also, Tits or GTFO
>>
>>739247881
If you enjoy it, go for it, and fuck what other people think. Plenty of people my age (30s) go to festivals and get fucked up. If you're having a good time, why should you care what other people will say?
If you actually feel too old for it for personal reasons, then give one or two a miss and see what happens. Try other things instead perhaps.
>>
I like sucking pussy until my face is glazed like a donut.
>>
>>739248194
Umm... okay? Way to twist my words into a totally unrelated argument.
>>
>>739247881
find festivals with older crowds. they are out there. burning man and shambhala. i saw and met a good bit slightly older cats (late 20s early 30s) at electric forest this year as well. festies in europe supposedly run higher as well. lol yeah and never be the desperate late 30 something at a festival, god damn that shit is hard to watch.

im ylunger than you and ive partied with 35 year olds all week at these things. they never made it weird and we didnt either. stay away from the younger chicks after 30 or so.... that shit is never a good look.
>>
>>739235136
>>739235136
I don't have a question that only a female could answer, but I like to be involved, so hi.
>>
How do I achieve trap-mode?
>>
>>739248632
Hi!
>>
>>739248355
Not really. 4chan is a community of anons. I don't start a thread: Hey. Maleanon here. If you are bored and want to be here, that's cool. Having to tell people you are a femanon without following the rules is not.
>>
>>739248532
>>739247881

You guys seen Carl?

One thing I've noticed about festivals is that middle agers often have the hardest times fitting in. The young and the old go together like PB and J, everybody loves an old hippie that's chill as shit. Middle aged people don't do as well for whatever reason. You're not even middle aged yet so shut up and enjoy yourself. The slightly older can act like kids at these things, that's the fucking point.
>>
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this thread makes my butthole bleed
>>
>>739235136
Im balding, would you rather date a man that is missing a few hair in the top or a man with his head shaved
>>
>>739249009
agreed. mods delete this abomination.
>>
>>739235136
do you think alopecia is a problem for most women?
>>
>>739249061
If you're just thinning a bit, I don't mind. If you've got a serious bald patch going on, then shave it all.
>>
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>>739235136
>femanon
>inb4 tits, sharpie, etc.
>yadayada im fat. That's all you're getting
>248 replies

>mfw

SUMMERTIME BITCHES! Wohooo!
>>
>>739247632
Psssshhhh I fuck her pregnant ass every day. There's no way she doesn't know I think she's hot.

But seriously, thank you. I'm not too worried anymore, just bummed.
>>
>>739249277
>>739249277
dubs of truth or i wouldnt have commented

OP tits GTFO
>>
>>739240500
Is your name Jen?
>>
What does your ass smell like?
>>
>>739235136
does this mean she's fat?
>>
>>739249633
No it's not.
>>
>>739249895
or a dude.
>>
>>739249698
Peaches.
>>
Why can't atheists define atheism?

Why?
>>
>>739250020
You are such a faggot
>>
>>739249895
Yes. Probably very.
Or, of course, this
>>739249985
>>
>>739239192
Need a microscope to see that
>>
>>739236432
You ever see that Disney movie Hercules, that sit's a dope ass movie
>>
What do you generally think about men?

Why do you come onto /b/? There is nothing for a straight girl here. This place is just going to make you hate things.
>>
>>739236151
Metric system's for queers.
>>
what's the hardest you have ever come?
>>
>>739236151
I can always tell a European. Your posts naturally read boring and slow.
>>
>>739250462
Men are alright on the whole - there are good guys and there are bad guys, just as there are good women and bad women.
I come on /b/ once in a while when I'm bored. I've been coming here on/off for years. I will abandon it for months then come back for a bit if I have nothing better to do. I'm not straight. I don't particularly hate things, but I'm very nihilistic.
>>
Tits or gtfo
>>
larp
>>
>>739250547
The time that I came while also high on speed.
Not recommended. I thought I was going to have a heart attack.
>>
>>739242796
Ramon if this is you she wants to fuck you.
Go fuck Ary.
>>
>>739250765
Nice. Yeah I guess now that I think about it hardest I came was from drugs too. Candyflipping--that was just some other shit.
>>
>>739251288
aryanna? that slut sucked me off in a handicapped stall once, I wouldn't go near her
>>
>>739251288
haha no, seems common then huh
>>
277 replies without tits. THIS is the death of /b/
>>
>>739235136
saying inb4 doesn't make you immune to those replies lmao
>>
>>739254579
>>739254677
you fuckers why did you have to bump this shit, it was on page 10
>>
>>739250677
Waist n ass pic please
>>
>>739244221
Why dont you go and tell your mommy what a smart boy you are
>>
>>739255115
cba
>>
so, there is this girl who im sure is into my and i like her too. We usually end up cuddling a lot when we hang out together, but she doesent want to go on a date together. What am i doing wrong? is there like a secret to getting a girl to admit she likes you?
>>
>>739256309
Ok. But anything else?

Q for you. There is this girl. We play sports together. Initially she was very friendly, etc, one on one and in the group. One day she just turned me off, on the courts, told me not to text anymore, etc. What happened?

Move ahead a month, and she randomly walks up and chats and leaves. What to do?
>>
>>739256411
If she's cuddling but doesn't want to go on a date then she's probably just using you to fill a physical needs void that she has. If I were you I'd stop giving in to the physical needs completely. Do that for at least 2 weeks, and see how things pan out between you. Perhaps she will start to initiate things with you herself. But don't fall into the trap - tell yourself that you will only do those things if she's your girlfriend. You're giving her the perks of a boyfriend without having her give you the commitment of being your girlfriend, and that's not fair on you.
>>
>>739256706
Tbh, I don't know. Perhaps you said something innocuous that offended her in some way. It's hard to tell. I'd continue acting normal around her to see how things progress. If you're feeling brave, you could always ask her why she ignored you for a month. If it were me, I'd ask. But I'm a dick who likes to call people out on that kind of shit because it makes them have to explain their twattery, and I don't how awkward it makes the situation.
>>
>>739256706
I meant to say, I don't care how awkward it makes the situation.
>>
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>>739235136
Sorry just saw the thread. Are you retarded? Why you have to state you are a woman? Will the advice be differently accepted if you say in the first place that you have a vag? If you are on an anonymous bored, where nothing else matters than what you write you don't have to say you are a woman if you not gonna prove it. Fuckin retard.
>>
>>739235136
how do i get an online sugar daddy without providing sex?
>>
>>739257499
Calm down homie, it's just the internet.
>>
>>739257614
Sell your used panties, become cam girl/guy, sell nudes?
I dunno.
>>
>>739257384
Thanks.

Good to hear that. I am of the same mind, either wait, or be a dick and call her out.

Though both seem like shitty options tbh.
Thread posts: 294
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