>aliens attack earth >they will not stop because they see

>>737697260
Buy a boat, go fishing.

>>737697260
Fap to alien overloards

surrender for possible future existence or dissection

dissection by alien would be ok

>>737697260
ayy lmao

go innawoods and fuck squirrels or something

masturbate to japanese cartoons

Anyone who gets quads is a super trained military personell and used bows and silenced guns and lives their lives until they die naturally.

>>737697260

go outside
wait for aliens to kill me

>i dont want to be alive anyway

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>they see our species as only a danger

>heh
>you know what that means

hope the aliens look like this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5pKWYT3NiQ

>>737697542
you can fit your dick inside a tp tube?

sit back and relax

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>>737697260
>posts this on UFO day
OP is an ayyy trying to learn lesser human escape tactics.

Turn 360 degrees and run away.

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>>737697260

My dear sir:

raper and pillage

Fine QT alien girl and marry

>>737697623
>you can't?

>heh

self pleasure for a bit then accept fate and surrender to the greater beings.

Roll dubs to make them leave

Fuck them all

>>737697905
that sounds like a plan...

>>737697542
Your dick must be fucking tiny.

>>737697398
but you do that everyday anon

Shit post on /b/

>>737697814
id definitely come out the other end i just cant fit it in pencil dick

>>737697260
https://youtu.be/1Jx19fVnoW4

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Ask them to take me to habitable planet and let me live out the remainder of my life looking at alien beasts and smelling alien smells.

>>737697905
rolling

>>737697260
throw bird shit on them

>>737697260
against the aliens? nothing. any alien civilization that could travel here would be so hopelessly superior it's like asking what ants should do about the guy stepping on them.

so i'd steal all the drugs i could, hide, and wait for death as high as possible.

>>737698169
what if they want to see what makes you tick?

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>>737697260
>locate the wreckage of the Imperial Japanese battleship Yamato
>raise the wreckage and rebuild it into a mighty spaceship
>kick alien ass

>>737697260
how are we a danger when we still have absolutely no clue how we will ever travel to even the closest star? Rocket technology is totally incapable of interstellar travel and alternative modes of propulsion are just fantasy at the moment. Sure we have ion drive systems but they are not even 1% as powerful, and still not efficient enough.

>>737698399
but it is probably 90% rust at this point...

TTTHHHHRRRRRRROOOOOOOWWWWW THE CHEEEEEEEEESE!

Procure old MacBook.
Hack mothership.
Defeat alien invaders.
Live the rest of my life being fucked to death by nubile teenage admireres.

>>737697260
Nuke our planets ice caps, nuke everything else.

>Final moment's if humanity shows a live broadcast from every country with citizens giving aliens the middle finger, fucking like rabbits
>Humanity screams "fuck you aliens, take the planet, we don't want it anymore"
>World becomes nuked to hell, no ice caps left.

>Aliens have to fill out like 1850 reports about how they fucked up enslaving the earth, die from paperwork.

>>737698404
Probably if we had the technology then we'd still have basic human instinct, like wild animals.

>>737698404
well the problem isn't really could we get to the next closet star, it's how long it would take and how much it would cost. right now that's longer than humans live and more than they could possibly afford to spend, but not impossible.

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>>737698296
Dude, there are ants in this world that can kill a man in minutes. If any alien were to kill us, it would take all of Humanity as a whole to stop. Why go out on their terms when we could potentially fight back and go on OUR terms.

>>737698549
good plan it will surely result in some alien carpel tunnel casualties

>>737698601
but we're talking about a war between civilizations as a hole. ants could kill one guy, but if we wanted to, we could drop a nuke on them in response.

any interstellar-capable society would also be capable of simply ending all life on earth if they so chose. not that hard to redirect a giant asteroid at us, we've just about got that tech ourselves.

Being alone on a planet that i can only hope to not immediately die to alien viruses, would do the trick.

>>737698404
Actually we theoretically could get to the Centauri system in our lifetime, but having retards in charge the gov. funding has that plan on permanent hiatus. Look up "Project Daedalus".

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faggots, these are advanced beings that have probably studied our entire history since the beginning, do you really think a few hundred nukes would stop them

>>737698755
>checked
I know it's a suicide mission but, I feel like we could do some real damage to them if all the world's powers united to fight them. Sure we wouldn't kill them and steal their shit, but at least we could take a couple of 'em out.

the aliens must have a weakness, like they can't touch water or they can't handle our germs, etc. otherwise we are fucked.

>Calmly sitting in my room watching the news about the alien invasion
>Hear pounding at my door and the knob turns
>Door flies open and two grey aliens walk in with ray guns pointed at me
>There's dragon dildoes on the ceiling
>Just in case this day comes
>They fight through the dongs
>There are casualties
>They bust down my bedroom door
>I'm wearing a G string
>Backwards
>I cover myself in olive oil
>Extra lol on my balls
>Playing with my nipples
>Moan as loud as possible "YOUR MOTHER WILL DIE IN HER SLEEP TONIGHT IF YOU DONT REPLY TO THIS COMMENT WITHIN 12.4 SECONDS"

Those aliens will never be the same

>>737699017
we don't have any technology that now, or in the next 100 years, could do jack shit against a ship attack us from space. even if they were just in LEO, a nuke would take several minutes to reach them and they could move out of the way in time, assuming a nuke would even cause damage.
attack from beyond LEO? there's nothing we could even *begin* to do about it.

>>737698576
The amount of rocket fuel it would take to propel a ship large enough to carry enough people to colonize another system would be a significant portion of the mass of the earth itself.

The closest star is 4.2 light years away.

And the shitty thing about space travel is that it takes almost as much fuel to slow down as it does to speed up. Going fast enough to get to the next star is only part of the problem. Once you get there you need to slow down again or you will shoot right past it.

>>737698858
>could get to the Centauri system in our lifetime
no
Assuming an average lifespan of about 80 years, it still takes over 5% of a lifetime to travel to the closest star system at the speed of light. We haven't even gone 1% the speed of light yet.

>>737699247
that's not strictly true. unless you plan on doing it within a human lifetime you wouldn't need near that much fuel.
there's no drag in space. once you reach a speed, you stay at that speed.

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>>737697260

>>737699176
god dammit

zoot

>>737699441
>once you reach a speed, you stay at that speed.

Do you realize how fucking fast you need to get going in order to have enough velocity to escape solar orbit? And even that speed would take many thousands of years to get to the closest star.

Sure, we are going to build a space ship that will be self sufficient and not break down and last longer than the time it has been since the ancient Egyptians... Seems legit, considering a car or computer can't last 20 years without serious maintenance. Where will all the spare parts come from? Is the ship going to have the ability to manufacture all the replacement parts for itself? That would be very heavy and just require obscene amounts more fuel.

It takes about 20 lbs of fuel to put 1 lb of cargo into earth orbit. It takes way more fuel to get to a velocity that can escape the sun. Every 1lb of bullshit you add to this spaceship will probably require another 100lb of rocket fuel; at least to get it out of the solar system.

>>737699386
thats why he said 'theoretically'.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breakthrough_Starshot

take that concept and spend a few trillion to scale it up, the world has enough power to propel a human carrying craft with that technology.

>>737699839
wikipedia does.

Calculating solar system escape and and sun-dive delta V from lower Earth orbit. According to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Escape_velocity at the Earth/Moon distance from the sun, the escape velocity is 42.1 km/s.

That's not all that fast in spacecraft terms.

>>Determine aliens are only looking for outliers.
>>Decide to use special education teacher knowledge for the good of mankind.
>>Activate maximum autism mode.
>>my power level is over 9000
>>humans are ants
>>oh God I can't even talk
>>it's ok I'm just going to emit a high pitched screetch when the overlords arrive
>>activate maximum autism powers
>>time has stopped all around me.
>>I have become sonic the hedgehog
>>Face-palm for 1 millisecond
>>simultaneously collect 100 gold rings and become a temporary God.
>>speed roll all alien ships.
>>aliens have maximum wtf faces displayed.
>>land on master alien 3x.
>>he explodes into flames
>>robotnik is pissed.
>>tails flies off the screen because he's drunk
>>chaos emerald is awarded

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Stop the Avatar project from completing

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>>737697260
Show them my chrome extension that replaces all the B's on a page with (B meme)

>>737700022
>That's not all that fast in spacecraft terms.

And yet the only spaceships we have ever gotten to those speeds are tiny little probes that weigh less than a car.

>>737697260
roll for dubs
maybe they'll leave then

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>>737697260
Simply I'd say, I'm a Jew and get a pass and be on my way.

Always take the shekels.

easy. Tweet "dumb as a bag of hammers Aliens are fake. will deport. Sad!"

>>737697351
this.

prob the best solution and way to peacefully enjoy life before the end.

Aliens does not exist

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>>737700239
because we've only launched a couple missions designed to do it.

if we did it with Voyager in the 70s we could do it with something 100x bigger now, even if it was 1000x the cost. this is simple technology that has no issues with scaling to something the size of say the space shuttle.

voyager is going 100x escape velocity now.

>>737700104
You must wield this weapon with care young Skywalker.

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>>737700211

>>737697905
look at these dubs

>>737700350
good job you contributed nothing KYS

>>737700775
or not...

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>>737700809
Do I get em?

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>>737697260
> I would call my son David.
> My David is in the army
> Tell the government that they knew the spiel
> They knew all along, from back in 1956
> They had dat thing under the desert, after it crashed in Roswell oy vey
> In the area, studio 5.. no area 51
> Joo knew then an you did nothing!

> Only my son David can save you
> You'd all be dead if it wasnt for my son Davieeed oy vey

>>737700579
>>As soon as all aliens have burst into flames I look in a mirror.
>>see faggot the hedgehog
>>run until I become space dust
>>oh dear flying spaghetti monster why did I ever activate my maximum autism powers?
>>turns out I have used all autism powers on earth for 100 years.
>>I'm dead, but autism no longer exists.
>>all the previous autists are normal now
>>they still have horrible taste and lackluster communication skills but are otherwise normal.
>>jump through golden ring
>>get a new world score
>>all other aliens see that ASS is the king of the universe.
>>live rest of 1000 year life in solitude
>>no alien is ever ready for sonic the autist

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>>737701642
Much like the quality of your existence, that greentext was horseshit,

>>737700393
And even at those velocities it would take voyager thousands of years to get to the closest star.

>>737697260
Figure out where they keep thier gonads. Design weapons that mangle said gonads.

>>737701864
yes thats why i was also talking about using the proposed method the breakthrough starshot program is proposing to use. it's not an issue of technology at this point, only of cost. extreme cost, but not technically impossible cost.

fap

>>737698755
Late reply, but
>we've just about got the tech ourselves
The fuck bro? The best we've got is theorizing about how gravitational waves work. We're not that good yet, not by a long shot

>>737698755
How do you figure we have the technology to redirect a giant asteroid? The best we could do is shoot a huge missile at it. Gravitons aren't even proven as a real particle yet, and they might not be as far as we know.

>>737703171
talking about redirecting asteroids, not FTL

https://www.nasa.gov/content/what-is-nasa-s-asteroid-redirect-mission

>>737697260
Jerk off. wipe hands. Throw tissue of semen at aliens. Die.

>>737697260
Hug my wife and son.
Finally open the 25yo bottle of Bowmore that's been untouched in my cabinet for years, smoke my last cuban and wait for the end together.
Gotta die sometime, might as well be now.
Only regret is not being able to see my son grow up.
The most beautiful sound in the world is to hear your own children laughing so I'd play with my son some more, chasing him, picking him up and tickle him.

>>737699176
l9l nice

>>737703741
someone like you should not be on /b/ your too good

>>737704544
Can't shake the habit.
Also this is a good place to vent weird interests and fetishes so I can act normal the rest of the day.

>>737699839
Well, I get your point.
But you're focusing on one solution per one problem. I'm an engineer at north west university. We built a solar glider the "sweeftuig".
The glider needs to be extremely light and needs to use next to no energy to keep its self going in order to maximize its flight distance.
If you were to build a single ship that uses rocket propulsion to break free from our solar system, then you are correct it would be practically impossible.
However, if you were to build a cluster of ships that acted as a unit you greatly decrease the possibility of complete mission failure as atleast some of the ships will make it.
To save weight you would use a type of weather balloon to lift each ship to orbit, reducing the amount of onboard fuel needee.
If you the cryogenically freeze the passengers of each ship and use solar sail propulsion (large sails that use light to propel itself) to get the ship to a good speed while it is in reach of solar light and then eject the shields when it no longer recieves light energy.

You can then let the ship cluster keep going on its momentum with small, efficient guider motors to keep it on course, allowing the cluster to "float" towards its destination.

You can also have seperate ships with no passangers which carries the equipment you would need to build bases.

A cluster of small (well, relatively small) ships would be much easier to launch and much more cost effective with a greater chance for success

>>737697260
Pretend I'm sleeping.

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>>737697260
Pretend you're a table.

>>737697260
Start crying. The aliens will have no choice but to give me sympathy and they'll walk away. Then I'll go rob a bank. Because I'm gangster.

>gain Level 9 access
>drop the value of the blemphlarks from one to nothing
>wait for the rest of season 3 to drop

>>737700995
Nice post anon, I appreciate it

http://imgur.com/gallery/w3nA4

>>737697260
Love the planet, love others, why would they find you a threat if you did those things?

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>>737697260
>>737707124


1/2

Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.35 http://imgur.com/gallery/ZHlJt Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.34 http://imgur.com/gallery/VZ5Oa
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.33 http://imgur.com/t/hfy/MNi0Z
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.32 http://imgur.com/gallery/MFoNS
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.31 http://imgur.com/gallery/whZyu
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.30 http://imgur.com/gallery/RslH9
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.29 http://imgur.com/gallery/HnnI0
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.28 http://imgur.com/gallery/3s9hC
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.27 http://imgur.com/gallery/luxN6
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.26 http://imgur.com/gallery/bQ4HF
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.25 http://imgur.com/gallery/EbKaP
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.24 http://imgur.com/gallery/TxTef
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.23 http://imgur.com/gallery/P1MyG
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.22 http://imgur.com/gallery/T2vRr

Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.21 http://imgur.com/gallery/Apgm1
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.20 http://imgur.com/gallery/yH5KS
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.19 http://imgur.com/gallery/6p75M
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.18 http://imgur.com/gallery/2Q59t
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.17 http://imgur.com/gallery/aKSJg/new
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.16 http://imgur.com/gallery/O9kIX
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.15 http://imgur.com/gallery/CN6S3
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.14 http://imgur.com/gallery/Lufhj
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.13 http://imgur.com/gallery/FBfiJ
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.11 http://imgur.com/gallery/0RnCm
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.10 http://imgur.com/gallery/OkADJ
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.9 http://imgur.com/gallery/6eqF4
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.8 http://imgur.com/gallery/I40UL
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.7 http://imgur.com/gallery/dChTo
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.6 http://imgur.com/gallery/8BadZ
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.5 http://imgur.com/gallery/DJZ6E
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.4 http://imgur.com/gallery/hfXvA
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.3 http://imgur.com/gallery/p2bEp
Humanity Fuck Yeah pt.2 http://imgur.com/gallery/7Z7NW

>>737708285
I fucked up the copy paste a bit
2/2

Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.40 http://imgur.com/gallery/PRQXG
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.39 http://imgur.com/gallery/K8qqk
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.38 http://imgur.com/gallery/59Rl3
Humanity (Canis) Fuck Yeah Pt. 37 http://imgur.com/gallery/RuLY8
Humanity Fuck Yeah Pt.36 http://imgur.com/gallery/8Mkd5

>>737697260
Make a steaming hot plate/bowl of hamburger helper, eat that shit and wait for inevitable death

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>>737697260

>>737700995
Hefty kek

Accept my death and hope i will be with my waifu soon.

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>>737700104
in tears

>>737697542
This is how I masturbated for the first time. Just fucked an empty roll because I was randomly hard on the toilet. I think I was 11 at the time. It actually took me until I was 13 to realize how to use my hands. I learned a few other methods during that time though.

>>737697260

Sounds a lot like whats going on in Germany atm

>>737697260
Build a wall

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Dave precious stuff

Jackoff onto their big gay heads

>Amid the chaos, abduct 3-14 year old girls
>Violently anal rape them
>just do this until my time comes

>>737699176
kek

>>737698601
Some ants can kill men, no ants can destroy a car.

>>737697260
panic

>>737699247
Getting to 15% the speed of light before we got out of "range" of the sun with a solar sail isnt hard, and the fuel issue is solved by using the other star to slow down, the issue is cost, no one country could build such a craft, plus we dont have anything feasible to protect them from solar radation.

>>737699247
Fuel is not really that important once you're out of the atmosphere, what is important is timing...

>>737705844
>eject the solar sails
You know how i know you arnt actually an engineer, explain this to me, how does a ship going so fast slow itself down at its destination with no deltaV
>>737699839
I do, you apperently dont, solar escape is 650km/s, 15% of the spead of light, which a solar sail could do easily, is 4.45 MILLION km/s, fuck, we could make some high specific impulse fuel that takes fucking forever to accelerate could do that, it would just take years to accelerate.
Stop acting like you know what you're talking about

>>737711967
Mind you thats if you take off from the surface of the sun, getting out of the solar system isnt that hard thanks to orbital mechanics, getting to the nearest star is something the human race could do within the next 30 years easily, and probably will do if spacex continues its course. Getting to %s of light speed isnt such an insane concept as it used to be, thanks to things like solar sails, and solar sails solve the fuel issue, you dont have to bring your fuel with you beyond fuel for manuveering thrusters to turn around and point you sail for deceleration

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>>737697260
Activate the Xcom Project. . . Commander.

>>737711967
650km/s is from the service of the sun. if you start from earth orbit it's only 42km/s. voyager is well past that already.

>>737712511
fuck all this not sleeping and drugs is making me type the entirely wrong word now. at least i spelled it right

>>737698494
there is no oxygen in space to make rust out of iron faggot