Been eating MREs for 3 days, haven't pooped. What should

You fucking boot why would you willingly eat MREs

>>737620458
Expect horrible pain and a visit to the ER if this is an intestinal blockage.

>>737620458
You're gonna die. Like no shit.

>>737620814
Probably a lil bitch boot calling OP a boot good job boot

Drink more water shithead I'm on day 10 no problems. I don't like MREs I don't have a choice

Expect to poop as soon as you start eating real food. I ate MREs for days after hurricane Ivan. Didn't poop for a week. Didn't have power for two weeks.

>>737620814
Who gives a shit if he's a boot, or is this you lashing out because one of them kicked your ass, stole your girl, fucked your mom, or all of the above.

>>737620458
Menu 24 is the only good MRE.

>>737621094
Fuckin boots

>>737620814
I was on a field problem in the Mojave and I stole a whole box of them from a NG unit from Wialeah Hi. I was hungry

Don't eat the fucking cheese
That shit makes your shit into clay

>>737621263
If only you could power your house with poop.

>>737623426
...shit.

Well, guess we'll see how this goes then.

Jalapeño cheese is awesome. Eat that shit all day long.

>>737620458
Would like to get some MRE's but theyre all expensive as shit. That 'my patriot supply' website has MRE's that will last 25 years but goddamn expensive

Who remembers the veggie omelet? Every time ypu aproach a box with only 1 in it it was always that one. I was in the Corps from 07 to 13, and we had the early 90s ones.

>>737624240
In the brown packages?

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>>737620458

M-Mr. president?

>>737624374
yes

>>737620458

BUT WAS THERE A HISS!?

alright.....
cool......
.......see ya....

Never eat the charms, that shit got your ass beat.

>>737620458
Try the omelette, makes me shit every time. Spaghetti with meat sauce and meatball marinara are the only tolerable MREs.

>>737624664
they got rid of the omelette. I used to mix tje combos in with the pasta

>>737624514
I was still eating them shits in Afghanistan '11. Fucking snack bread and Jap cheese was turning brown.

>>737624805
I thought they just made it rarer. /:

>>737624846
i was there in 11

I put the iced tea mix on the chicken breast

The new tuna ones are pretty solid. At least it's relatively human food.

>>737625404
Were you eating MREs in a tower on the perimeter of a base where shit never happened?

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>>737620458
Do you know what "shit-brick* means? :3
Try to ask /k/ with this

>>737625916
no, I was on a CAAT team, spent 4 straight months outside the wire with 5 pairs of socks.

>>737625961
Is this picture a troll like what the actual fuck. A wacom tablet, buttplug, gun, listerine and an MRE? Are you actually physically retarded? What the shit man, I thought humanity had a chance and you had to FUCKING RUIN IT.

>>737626196
Dildo not buttplug, retard alert

>>737625916
I got my Combat action Ribbon on my first patrol. They were aiming at me because of the antenna. I got back at them with arty..

>>737626101
Dam hardass, which one did you use for your beat sock? I had to worry about the green bean running out of the caramel syrup.

Make the ranger pudding, bro (cocoa powder and water). It makes you shit your brains out.

>>737620458
Chew the gum and drink the coffee, youll shit

>>737625961
Nice CZ.

>>737620458
Shut the fuck up boot, probably in fucking MCT or some shit. There's motherfuckders that have been eating MRE's for months over seas.

>>737626614
Actually I'm a civilian who came across a handful of the things for free and they're easier than cooking. I'm actually surprised this went anywhere.

>>737625961
>>737625961
I remember that thread from /k/...
It was a pleasant evening full of conversation, that retard drank 4 bottles during 3 hours

>>737625961
>>>/k/34424304

Done.

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If you're interested in MREs, don't get the American shit. I highly recommend the Canadian ones. Plus the packaging is aesthetic as fuck.

>>737626835
I'll have to take a look. Can't be a bad idea to have these things around just in case. Do love chipotle.

>>737626551
Thank you

>>737626832
By the way... Why did you steal my picture?

>>737627034
because you told me to "ask /k/ with this" and you posted a picture.

>>737627149
Bloody Chinese cartoon board!

>Be OP, in a couple of days
>Will feel a gurgling in stomach and pressure on the ol' balloon knot
>Must get to shitter at that point, do not delay
>First, you'll drop a quart of liquid shit
>That'll loosen him up nice and good for what's coming next
>Ever shit a grapefruit covered in razor blades, OP? Because that's what your in for...
>There's no stopping it either, it's just going to happen
>Slowly and painfully
>It'll feel like your butthole is tearing, because it probably is
>When it finally comes out, you'll be dealing with a reverse vacuum situation
>It'll feel like your colon is imploding
>Finally, to top it all off, another half-gallon of burning shit-water
>Will sound like you're pissing out of your ass
>When it's all over, you won't be sure if you should call the hospital or a rape counselor

>>737625961
That picture pose way more questions than it answers. If it's saying a thousand words I'll be goddamned if I know what they are.

>>737627333
>>737627034
/k/ is being uncooperative.

Gonna be a massive MRE baby.

Beef stew was the best. Heat the cheese with the stew so it's easier to mix in. Crumble crackers up and drop them in the stew. Works better if you cut the top of it lengthwise then you have a little bowl.

Add Tabasco, too.

>>737629034
>Beef stew was the best.
This guy knows

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>>737620458

eat some kefir or even yogurt if you can....

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>>737620458
Pic very related...my record was eight days and it was like popping a cork on a champagne bottle. I'm glad I had another pair of ACUs.

>>737620458
Hope that you shit soon, otherwise when you eventually do it may cause an anal fissure.

>>737620458
Don't expect to poop until you stop eating MREs. When you do poop, it's gonna be the craziest shit of your life. I once had to eat them for 6 days straight and it was the worst smelling shit ever

>>737629034
>>737629206
Oh, I have a couple of these, will be dinner tonight then. I'll do it your way. I've just been eating them cold so far.

The sausage and maple pancake were way better than I were expecting them to be.

>>737629592
Bro you can also use the cardboard box as sort of a pot holder. But i guess if you arent in the suck you probably have a bowl nearby.

I ate many cold. Beef stew was the only one I bothered to beat. The veggie omelette was fucking terrible imo.

>>737628425
> A MAGICAL PLACE

>>737621347
Found the other boot

>>737621023
Dude sometimes I don't poop for a week then I dump 4-8lbs in the toilet when I do go

>>737626835
Point me to a website

>>737623156
boot boot boot boot