I'm a 75 year old christian. I've learned a lot in

R u gay

>>736888660
Are human sacrifices more effective than prayers?

>>736888660
So, let me ask you a bit of a question:
Do you believe in magic?

if jerk to trap porn without knowing it was trap porn am i still gay?

>>736888975
In my experience incest is only punishable by curses, not eternal damnation.

>>736889055
You are only gay If you act on these urges. But Jesus loves gays so don't worry.

>>736889053
I believe in miracles, my friend

>>736888660
How can I hold my farts for longer?

phew, thought i was a gonnner, praise jesus and heil hitler

>>736889010
Thou shall not murder. But if you do, doing it in the Lords name would be wise.

>>736889006
>>736889006
No. I have a lovely wife of 52 years.

>>736888660
How do you reconcile the fact that your religious espouses slavery?

>>736888660
whats your favourite bible passage

>>736889311
Try sticking a finger in your rectum.

>>736889422
Deut. 25:11. I made sure Mary Sue and my girls knew this one by heart.

>>736888660
>myniggajesusandhishoes.jpg
>75 year old christian
What kind of 75 year old Christian has filenames like that, or knows about 4chan? I smell shenanigans. Baloney-scented shenanigans

File: this-is-every-old-mans-facebook-profile-picture-and-its-11644987.png (135KB, 500x522px) Image search: [Google]

135KB, 500x522px

>>736888660
Impossible given your typing style. 75-year-olds literally type like this:
>I'M A 75 YEAR OLD CGRISTIAN AND I'VE LEARNED MUCH IN MY YEARS AND SO I MUST SHARE WITH YOU MY WISDOM !
All caps.
Run-on sentence.
Space between final word of sentence and closing punctuation.
Bonus: put "GOD BLESS" at the end of everything.

>>736889414
I don't. There is no need to reconcile because anyone it affected is long gone or has no need for reconciliation.

>>736889618
My friend. I assume you think every old man isn't hip and cool. In my day I had "hoes" and "niggas". I use those words daily to remind myself that I'm am not perfect and never will be. p.s. I've got a sick dab "fam"

File: hqdefault.jpg (20KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 480x360px

>>736889526
Mary Sue, you say?

>>736889658
But your holy book describes how to treat your slaves as if there's nothing immoral about owning people.

File: maxresdefault (3).jpg (76KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 1280x720px

>>736889805

>>736889653
Very funny my friend. While most elderly people have this experience with technology I am blessed with many daughters and grand daughters and sons and grandsons that keep me up to date and let me know about all the new trends. I even have a snapchat.

File: 1470443910666.jpg (596KB, 962x3726px) Image search: [Google]

596KB, 962x3726px

>>736888660
What are your thoughts on this?

>>736889805
Ah, The ol' rapping for jesus. This is one of me and Mary Sue's favorite memes. I'm glad you know it too. It really gets the message across without being to crude or lewd like most rap music is.

>>736888660
Do you believe that the Earth is flat?

>>736889344
Thank you wise one.

>>736889935
While this is what some people call blasphemy I call it good and fun. Speculation is good because it leads to answers. However this acts as if the bible is the only proof of gods existence. It is not.

>>736890164
Care to give some proof then? (also the bible really doesn't prove anything)

>>736890110
I believe it is irrelevant. God made the earth perfect so I'm not worried about the shape of it. (But it is flat.)

>>736890232
Kek

>>736890200
The proof is in the miracles My friend. And the biggest miracle of all. The Human Brain.

>>736888660
Were the Egyptians really black niggers? You know, kangz and sheeeit?

>>736890398
I do not believe the egyptians were "black niggers". They were very hard working people.

>>736889835
Is there anything immoral about owning people?

>>736888660
Do you believe in evolution?

>>736888660
I'm perpetually single, and people tell me that I should go to church in order to meet women. However, I don't believe in Christianity, the bible or god (I'm agnostic), so wouldn't that basically be insincere and disrespectful of me to attend solely for the purpose of meeting women?

>>736888660
Is George Soros the antichrist?

>>736890555
Church is just a building my friend. Do what you want in that building. I ask you however to not harass anyone.

>>736890551
Yep

>>736890575
As far as I know, No.

Thread kinda dying. I'm going to church soon. Get your wisdom while you can.

1) Why do you wear and venerate a piece of wood used as an instrument of torture and execution?
2) Did you know God ordered Jesus to suffer for all of humanity? What did the good jew do to deserve such a fate? How can you respect god after what he did to his own son?

3) What is Christianity's connections to the Aryans? Wikipedia says they were in India, Hitler said they were white Europeans. Which one is true?

>>736889311
When you try to hold it in, think on your nipples and breathe up.

>>736891306
1.Because it is a reminder of the sacrifice Jesus gave up because he loved you and me and everyone.
2.Jesus was a necessary sacrifice to prove love.
3. I would have to research more to give a correct answer.

>>736891752
>Necessary sacrifice
>to prove love

If a human did that in modern day to someone, the whole world would be screaming for his blood. Why is it OK when god does it?

Also,
>"Dad, please, it hurts! I'll do anything else, please make this pain stop!"
>"Nah. I know you are innocent, but the remaining million scumbags are not, and the remaining BILLIONS coming in the future are not. So you will have to suffer for all of them, even though you really did nothing wrong."
>Loves everyone
>Orders his own son to die
>Because of crimes people not even born will do

Your lord has fantastic logic

Why do you only shave your left goose egg?

>>736892323
God didn't kill his son. Jesus still lives at the right hand of the father.

>>736892448
Because it's the only one Mary Sue sucks.

If Jesus was real and he came back wouldn't"Christians" be among the first ones he starts getting rid of? His name has been bastardized by Christians, merciless acts of inhumane attrocities have been carried out in his name by Christians in a "Christian" nation, and even the day which celebrates his birthday is actually the birthday of another god whom God emplored his people not to worship (not to mention Jesus was most likely black or some other form of brown skin). What makes Christians feel safe when in actuality they represent almost everything Jesus stood against?

>>736892481
I never said he did. God didn't shock Jesus with a lightning bolt, nor did he send a giant fish to eat him up.
No, all God did was "Hey son, I know something fun for you to do! Go get nailed to a cross for all the shit that billions of people are going to do!"
What annoys me even further is that if a human used this thought process, then he his labelled and arrested. I can't kill a young child saying "You'll kill a lot of people in the future so better die now" But god can do it? To his innocent son, no less?

Defend this hypocrisy

>>736893034
Christians feel safe because Jesus isn't god. He has only the power god gave him. This is often confusing. If Jesus tried to kill the humans he would be cast down to hell like lucifer. A lot of people say jesus is god. This is false, god said there shall be no god but him. We haveglorified jesus so much though.This is why drawing the prophet muhammad is looked down upon, because it glorifies muhammad not Allah.

File: pobrane.jpg (7KB, 259x194px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 259x194px

Do u like from behind?

Are you Adventist? Am i

File: 1497458541575.jpg (101KB, 736x591px) Image search: [Google]

101KB, 736x591px

>>736888660
I'll take the bait. As an old man, no offense, what was your own personal downfall? You can tell us young people everything, but they have to want to listen.

So I ask, what secrets do you wish god never knew about?

>>736893081
My friend, this is not hypocrisy but confirmation of what I told you. Jesus was a sacrifice. A sacrifice for all sins. He willingly sacrificed himself in order to save humanity.

>>736893303
I don't. But Mary Sue sure does.

>>736893384
Let me spell it out for you- GOD ORDERED HIS INNOCENT SON TO DIE
Also, fun fact-Jesus didn't willingly sacrifice himself. He actually begged god for another way out because of the pain. God simply let an innocent man suffer because blind religious shits like you will defend him.

>>736888660
What do you regret the most?

>>736893347
I became attached to Mary Sue and spent a majority of my teen years lusting after her instead of following gods plan for me. I also still struggle with my habit of consuming alcohol to this day. I wish I could stop, but I don't want too. The secrets I wish god didn't know about? My affair I had. I still regret to this day.

>>736893676
My affair. A situation I will never be proud of and will always regret.

>>736888660
How the fuck do magnets work?

>>736893626
“Father, if You are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from Me. Yet I want Your will to be done, not Mine.” - Luke 22:42 NLT Jesus wanted to die and willingly did so.

>>736893255
That really didn't answer my question but your answer led to another question. If Jesus isn't God but people worship him that way anyway, doesn't that mean they've turned him into an idol and by wearing crosses and other materials they are actively participating in idol worship and try to encourage others to idol worship as they do?

>>736893815
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hFAOXdXZ5TM That should help you.

>>736893763
Did you get caught?

>>736888660
What's the purpose of life?

>>736893909
Kind of not really. We do not worship Jesus but pray to him and thank him be cause "Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me." Jesus is the telephone we use to call PizzaHut (god) to get Pizza (heaven)

>>736894087
To live and love. Do these things and you will be happy.

>Dad, please make this pain stop
>In spite of all the torture you are putting me through, I still love you and want to do what you say

Yeah, I think I hate god even more now.
Poor Jesus really did do nothing and I feel really sorry for him. But I'll never bow down to god for obvious reasons.
You had your fair chance. Sorry pal, but your wisdom really seems like hypocrisy.

>>736893949
Yes I did. Mary Sue was very understanding of the situation and she forgave me the instant I told her.

>>736893713
You gave an honest answer and I respect that. I'm guessing marry sue is morphine sulfate? You know you were forgiven a while ago, right?

I get the idea you carry more than an adultery kind of affair...in any case, Why did you do it? Was it money, lust of pussy, the idea things were better? I'm actually interested in an old mans story.

>>736894162
My friend, I'm sorry you feel that way. But could could you please tell me when Jesus asked for the pain to stop?

>>736894129
Cool,does that mean life without love is not worth living?

>>736888660
Have you ever tried DMT? if not why?

>>736888660
If adam and eve where the first ones on earth...
Why do they Have bellybuttom..??

>>736894297
From your own excerpt,
>Father, if You are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from Me
>Father
>if
>you
>are
>willing
>please
>take
>this
>cup
>of
>suffering
>away
>from
>me

There.

>>736888660
If Satan is so good at deceiving people, how do you know Christianity isn't just another deception?

>>736894217
Mary Sue is my wife. I have known her ever since we were 13. I saw her and instantly fell in love. But she was the new girl and was snatched up very quick by someone braver than me. I however didn't move on and stayed in my home town just to be close to Mary Sue until she got married. Then I left and never looked back. We met again some years later while I was visiting my folks and god led us to be married and have a wonderful life. In those years I lusted after Mary Sue I didn't talk to God much. Instead I talked to a bottle. And my relationship with alchohol begun. Want to know more?

>>736894562
you judge someone on their work(s) not words.

>>736894095
But praying to something is worship. You don't pray to something unless there is some form of worship and the prayer in and of itself is worship. Also why put faith in a book that has been rewritten at least 13 Times?

>>736894326
Precisely. But not only love for others but love for yourself. Preferably both but one is enough.

>>736894426
Becuase they were created in the image of God and god has a belly button

>>736894397
I have not and don't plan on it.

>>736894634
Sure....what held you back? What made you find god? I guess I want to hear the full story without having to pick for details. did you ever "feel" her...somehow in the back of your mind?

I thought 4chan was my safe place from the religious bullies?

>>736894693
Not rewritten, translated. We pray to Jesus so he will contact the Father. That's the only way to contact God.

>>736894853
My friend, I am not a bully. I simply want you to see my point of view. I won't force you to see my pov though. That's the difference.

>>736888660
How would you define success in life?

>>736894911
When things are intentionally left out and intentionally added to it, that makes it a rewrite not a translation. Then the translations are not accurate either. Are you aware Lucifer simply means morning star and is not the actual name of the "devil"?

>>736894825
My lust and drunkedness held me back the most. I was an insufferable bastard. But when I went to college when Mary Sue got Married I had a roomate that opened my eyes to the lords love.....And Marijuana. We had long talks about religion and it really made me understand it. I always planned on marrying Mary Sue, but I just didn't know when it would happen. I always thought of her but I didn't want to break up her marriage.

Jesus is the way.

>>736888660
Get the fuck off /b/. You don't belong here. Go to /pol/ with the rest off the degenerates.

>>736895105
Samma'el or Hala'el, both meaning "bringing the Light of God", Lucifer is the Latinization of the Hebrew name. Things are only left out if they are duplicate verses.

>>736889459
Can I use yours?

>>736895410
Amen brother.

>>736895457
I'm afraid you can't. I'm loyal to Mary Sue and that ain't changing any time soon.

>>736895238
I see...I guess the question is....do you think anything would have worked out before? I have a situation in life kinda close to yours. I highly doubt I'm ever talk with her again on civil terms tho.

>>736894476
My friend, Context matters as the great Pewdiepie taught me. Jesus is under no pain at that moment so he is not asking for pain to stop.

>>736895546
Says the guy who admitted to having an affair a short while earlier.
Come on, it'll be fun! And she deserves better than you anyway. Let me show you the joys of being a cuckold!

>>736895558
I'm not sure. Meeting Mary Sue for the second time was pure luck and I don't know if we'd be married if I met her before or after that day.

>>736895726
Absolutely not My friend. Mary Sue has my heart. I believe Once is a mistake. After that it's a sin. And the wages of sin is death.

File: 1496530628563.jpg (550KB, 853x1024px) Image search: [Google]

550KB, 853x1024px

>>736888660
I'm a Luciferian, do you hate me?

>>736895741
I guess all things meant to be. I wish you the best old timer. I have things to do, god speed.

>>736889411
>75 year old
>52 wife
23-24 year difference
she was 16 and he was 39? Like Mr and Mrs Macron?
Out of topic question:
Are you a priest by any chance?

>>736895558
But don't worry. If you are meant to be together you will be together. If not, then someone way better than her or him is out there for you. Don't settle in life my friend.

>>736895425
So the Gnostic gospels were an entire book of duplicate verses? Not to mention that it's still changing God's word, whether is duplicate, triplicate, or quadrupled verses, they should be left as written by God and not by man. Truthly how could anyone know what was the original verses and what was changed or left out in order to keep people subdued?

>>736895636
>Nailed to a cross
>Rusted iron nails through his flesh and bone holding him against a piece of wood
>In both hands and his feet
>the word excruciating is derived from crucifixion as it caused such intense pain
>Also wearing a crown of thorns
>Bleeding all over the place
>Was flogged, stoned and jeered at the whole time
>In front of his mom, no less
>Under severe physical, mental, emotional stress
>under no pain lol god is always right

Sure. Whatever helps you work out that cognitive dissonance and sleep at night.

>>736895922
I love you my friend. Hate brings hate. And I have had enough hate for a life time.

The question for /b is, Is there such a thing as good and evil ?

>>736896033
You know, the area's where they inserted the spikes were actually central nerve zones in the wrist. So it literally physiologically hurt like hell.

>>736896119
Well, religion is evil so evil at least must exist.

>>736895999
God speed anon. I really doubt most of you understand the energies at play..thank you,

That nice hot cheeseburger with cool lettuce on it sure is good. But when someone takes it away from you and throws it in the trash, that's evil.

>>736896033
That verse is taken from the garden of gethsemane. Jesus is under no pain (at that time) but praying to god that he doesn't have to go through pain. but then says "let your will be done, not mine."

>>736896159
Yep. And god ordered his son to go through with it, because religious people like Op will defend him with bullshit logic like this >>736895636

Go to a country without religion and you will experience true evil and hell on earth.
N Korea comes to mind.
Do ya like that ??

>>736888660
>75 years old
>still browses 4chin
Why haven't you grown up yet?

>>736896289
Well... It was the nature of things back then. For example, you had to have your fattest lamb or what the fuck ever killed to be forgiven of your sins. Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice and part of the main drawing point was that he went through it for you. So while I agree it was an excruciating experience, in the Christian dogma it was necessary.

How about when someone wraps a pair of tongs around your neck and squeezes until your head pops off, is that good or evil ? Sounds like fun ?

Today I had a dream where I was spectating a great war in fantasy-like setting, I was flying all over the battlefield and in the last moments of dream I teleported into human's king chamber. Suddenly there was a man behind doors next to the king and he said ''my name is Edzun, let me in!'' some of the king's high guards let him in, and then the dream finnished. What does this mean?

>>736896430
Live isn't about growing up. It's about living and loving.

>>736896430
>12
>bitching about people's age on 4chin
Why haven't you grown up yet?

>>736896621
Because I'm 12 years old

So, all of you who want to live in a world where everyone killing, raping, burning, destroying, just don't believe in anything, there is no good or evil or god or religious belief.

>>736895922
I will Pray for You

>>736896681
mododododos

>>736896289
Jesus wasn't asking to be spared but double checking to see if this really was the plan. Jesus set the example for us. To make sure god is talking and we aren't being deceived by satan.

>>736888660
I am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girl

how do i make my pee pee bigger?

>>736896734
I think he was hoping that by praying to G-d that the crucifix would be more bearable.

And BTW, if you REALLY want to see slavery and environmental devastation go to a country where there is only the religion of the state like china.

>>736896534
Likely a collection of fantasy you have subconsciously collected over the years.

OP, do you admit that religion is medieval hypocritic bullshit that we need to grow out of? Because >>736896469 makes an excellent point.

Oh, and the next time you go to church, don't pray for me. Just give Jesus a message-tell him that while I think his dad is a colossal dick and he underwent hell for no reason, I still think he is a really cool guy who deserved a lot better than what he got. Tell him that as a geneticist interfering with the laws of nature, I am ready to go to hell, if only so that I can find some cure or something to help the rest of the human race. Tell him that I consider him to be a hero and I am aware that I'll never be like him. Tell him that he has my utmost respect, unlike you.

t. hindufag, who eventually grew to become an atheistfag who has nothing against religion, just hates the shitters that try to force it on me

>>736888660
>I am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girl
I am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year old buddgist monk and after years if meditation, I have reached enlightenment. I now know that it is my sacred duty to request rule 34 on 404 girlI am a sixty - five year ol

>>736896849
Ask Ron Jeremy.

Why won't the Vatican turn over its wealth to the poor?

>>736895994
Are you retarted

>>736896887
Religion is not necessary however it makes this shit storm of a life better if approached correctly.

>>736896936
Because catholics are corrupt. I'd recommend looking up the story of Martin Luther for further learning on Corrupt catholicism.

>>736895994
fuck are you dumb or what.
they have been married for 52 years,

>>736896919
Ask and you shall receive. https://4archive.org/board/b/thread/689720121

>>736897059
It's alright. I have principles that I will never defy. That's enough for me.
This was fun. Until next time, OP

P.S-you're not so bad yourself considering you are a hypocritic religionfag. I hope you die peacefully in your sleep, satisfied with your life.

>>736897236
52 wondrous years.

>>736888660
Wise aged christian, will god punish me for taking promiscious women by force?

what are these red spots on my shaft and how do i get rid of them?

>>736897372
Thank you for the well wishes, I wish the same for you friend.

>>736897449
God does not punish. He simply judges. Ask for forgiveness and you will be forgiven.

what are your opinions on laestadianism?

>>736897396
good to hear anon, I was talking about the full that thought that there was a 23-24 year difference between you and your wife.

it's sad to see that that basic understanding of marriage terminology is already being lost.

>>736897464
Stop masturbating for a couple of days and see if that helps. Alternatively, see a dermatologist.

>>736897552
does that work with the judge too if i get caught?

>>736897561
>laestadianism
Too many rules. Not enough love.

>>736897655
Sadly, no.

>>736897576
It truly is sad. Not many people are getting married anymore. And the ones that get married get divorced. I pray for couples in this world.

God loves humanity so much that he sent his son to die for us, as a human, a divine spirit, supernatural, alien from another dimension, call it whatever you want, he was here as a human. In Jesus' humanity he asked God his father if there were any other way, but there was none. So he willingly bore all of our sin on the cross and through his death. The real victory is the resurrection. He lives, bros, he lives.

Also, applying the Big Bang and planetary disk formation to creation is interesting if you read through genesis. Time is relative, especially to a supreme being aka God. Who am I to say that a Day isn't just a measurement of time that God placed into the Bible to be easily understood by a newly blossoming species created/ evolved/ in his image. Just sayin, if fits if you can humble yourself to admit not being able to comprehend what it takes to create the universe/ life within it.

>>736897810
I'll take that prayer anon.
I have been happily married for 9 years now and we have just been blessed with our first child.

>>736888660
Have you ever had a peedriver? That's a couple shots of vodka and urine from a nasty bitch. It's the favorite drink amongst 4chan users.

Dear /b/rothers in christ and all alike. This is OP signing off. I wish you all luck. This is the longest thread I have ever had, thanks for all the questions, discusions, trolls and memes. I love you all.

>>736897901
Good luck in the future. 9 years is still a long time.

>>736897956
Are you going to drink peedrivers now?

>>736888660
fuck this shit, see >>131268280