Ask a p-psychologist anything! Feeling down and out? L-like

are you getting paid to stutter like a weeb

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>>735580522
I'm n-not stuttering like a weeb <4

>>735580477
Who are you picking between ward vs kovalev 2?

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>>735580747
W-ward for sure.

>>735580477
Are you the same Alice with the cute legs that shows anons how to cook?

who is this cute girl and how tight is her pussy

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>>735581138
T-that is me!

>>735581152
I'm Alice!

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>>735581172

>>735581172
I want to fuck your ass

>>735581172
Do you only make these threads on 4chins? If so why did you pick this site?

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>>735581152
As w-well, vaginas go slack and "baggy" when aroused, expanding b-by a significant percentage. This is b-because an actually "tight" vagina w-would be uncomfortable for b-both parties.

Any "squeeze" is provided b-by muscles, n-not from merely "tightness". Your penis is q-quite sensitive Anonymous; if a woman is t-tight, you might get hurt or s-she might be poorly lubricated.

>>735581281
Sorry t-to say, I am a biological woman <4

>>735580477
Why are you writing like that

>>735580477
Quit typing like a fucking idiot and just have a normal fucking interaction you mentally defective internet pseudo psych faggot. Also, have a nice day XD

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>>735581281
So? You saying you wouldn't?

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>>735581324
I've b-been a part of 4chan s-since 2004; where else w-would I go? I work to help clean up my home <4

>>735581313
Good t-to hear? You w-won't be able to <4

>>735581336
Do you make those reaction drawings yourself?

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>>735581346
T-to make this guy
>>735581353
mad. S-seems to be w-working <4

>>735581336
Have you taken it in the ass and did you liked it

>>735580477

psychodynamic or cbt?

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>>735581432
Y-yes, using a little known device known as a p-printer.

>>735581454
N-neither, neuropsychopharmacologist <4

Is it weird or detrimental to talk to yourself

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>>735581503
N-no. It's usually b-beneficial.

>>735580477
Ask you anything?

Elighten me on the golf rumours?

>inb4 /x/

>>735581493

so just meds? how you gonna distribute meds over the 4chans?

>>735581493
show us your cute feet, I want to cum. also more stutter please, its making my dick hard

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>>735581554
S-sorry, don't know any <4

>>735581560
I'm n-not a psychiatrist dear.

>>735581563
You s-should check out my leggy twitch streams: celtyplays.

>>735581353
>quit typing like a fucking idiot
> XD

Please do us all a favor and choke.

>>735581493
Have you ever done a cooking tutorial with the Kamina glasses on? If not can you do it next time just for me?

I'M ALICE.

>>735581599

well you got me confused. how would you treat social phobia, for example?

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>>735581632
I c-can try, but it is a little d-difficult to hold two things at once.

>>735581649
Oh g-good, now that another one has s-shown up, I c-can retire.

Did you take it in the ass

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>>735581683
b-beta blockers and a firmly held hand <4

Doesn't mean I'd prescribe them.

>>735581685
Even just printing one of the facial expressions with the glasses on would work, Don't expect you to bend over backwards to make it work

I'm going to kill myself if you don't post tits and a timestamp

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>>735581733
D-depends on my mood.

>>735581778
If your l-life is so fragile that a woman n-not doing what you tell them to do w-would cause you sufficient emotional turmoil to end y-your own life, there is nothing I could do to save you anyway.

I'm sorry Anonymous, I'm so so sorry.

>>735581685
ALRIGHT FUCKTARDS. I'M THE NEW ALICE.
BOW DOWN TO YOUR GOD.

>>735581737
stop with the animu pics and show us your tight bod, no clothes prefered

>>735580477

Miss anon, i want help. I fucked up a confession to a girl I liked a year ago and I havent gotten over it. I feel guilty and ashamed of myself for some reason. Could you please help me with this? Thanks

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>>735581747
I c-can try <4

>>735581875
None of t-these pictures are from anime. I'm f-from a video game.

>>735581858
W-well you just proved you aren't an Alice.

>>735581894
*blinks slowly* C-could you give me more details on w-what happened?

>>735581852
Post your tits you whore

>>735581894
o-oh anon the only option now i-is to kys. u r a f-f-faggot, sowwy <4

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>>735581946
It is exactly b-because I am not a whore of any kind t-that I do not post such a thing. <4

Hey Alice, I've seen your threads here which inspired me to make free medical advice threads (I'm a freshly graduated attending physician). I think I get why you do this, there's something liberating about being able to help people anonymously; it's made practicing medicine a little more fun.

Anyway, I sometimes get cases here that are a little out of my scope and could benefit from your services. How about I refer my psych patients to your patreon in exchange for noodz?

>>735581945
S-sorry about that..
I-I just went a little t-too overboard...

>>735581532
Explain

Guys this is not real Alice.

>>735581945

Erm. I texted her that I wanted to tell her my feelings, and then I confessed. She said she didnt feel anything for me. For the next few months I felt the need to avoid and ignore her and we didnt talk (I wasnt close to her prior to the confession too, so.)

>>735581737
Okay I'll actually contribute to the thread's topic a little bit.
This feels like a really dumb question I'm probably wasting your time with but.
Near the end of my last relationship there were a lot of games and bands and whatnot I would avoid/hate just because she liked them and I didn't realize it at the time but I didn't like her anymore either.
Lately though I've been enjoying a lot of those same things. But despite the fact we broke up a little less than a year ago I still think about her quite a bit.
You think I'm enjoying these things now because I can just accept them as they are without attaching my dislike for her to them now, Or is it another sign that I'm not completely over her? (On top of our relationship still weighing on my mind a little)

>>735581975
Nah all women are whores, you're not special

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>>735582005
S-sorry dear, I don't p-post nudes. You c-can feel free to have them email me however: [email protected]

>>735582022
T-talking to yourself activates your auditory loop; you in m-many ways hear yourself as if it w-was another person, helping you w-work out your ideas and active pathways of t-thought that may lead to a solution.

>>735582057
*blinks slowly* S-so what is there to be embarrassed over?

You made an attempt. It didn't work.
You should feel great you tried!
You should feel like shit it didn't work out!
But the fact it didn't work out shouldn't embarrass you; you did nothing wrong! Not everything HAS to work out!

The best advice I can give you is forgive yourself and move on, Anonymous. It's not a big deal.

>>735582005
Would someone really do that just go on the internet and tell lies

>>735582043
Yes it is.

>>735582089
*tips fedora*

>>735582070
Stop being a pussy, grow a pair

>>735580477
Stop typing like a fucking retard. It's not cute or funny, it's just pathetic.

>>735580477
I feel like I have nothing to live for, and the only reason why I'm alive is because my parents invested so much into me and I don't want to waste.

I also don't trust anyone and feel that anyone trying to get in a relationship with me is out to get me

What do?

>>735582141
Thanks for the advice, appreciated.

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>>735582089
I t-think you'll find q-quite a few women will n-not trade sex for money.

>>735582070
I t-think both? You clearly aren't over h-her, but it's also clear y-you are recovering from the relationship and exploring your own tastes again.

As long as no one is harmed, what is the problem?

>>735582193
You m-mean like seeing a thread you don't l-like and rather than ignoring it t-taking time out of your day to g-go out of your way to reply with distaste f-for something you have no control over?

Is that "pathetic" or "powerless", I always get those two mixed up....

>>735582184
Go play in traffic

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>>735582228
M-my pleasure.

>>735582197
Go to a doctor; you have anhedonia and you need help.

>>735582256
Stick your dick in a blender first.

>>735582277
Chek'd
Hello from the laundromat, Alice!
I'm gonna start the day with fresh, clean clothes.

>>735582141

Right, have "them" email you. I read you loud and clear Alice.

is it fucked up to enjoy depression

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>>735582377
G-good for you Anonymous <4

>>735582397
It's b-been six years and n-no one has seen my nudes dear. Not even nip slips.

T-try someone with less of a sense of self worth.

>>735582421
It m-means what you are experiencing isn't depression. It's s-sadness.

>>735582250
One way or another payment is made to a cunt, doesn't matter if it's with an actual prostitute or with a dumb whore I got drunk to fuck, or took on dates. Still a form of payment. All women are whores. You included, so whip out them tits and post a pic

>>735582296
Interesting suggestion, maybe you should try it then go play in traffic while I rape your mother

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>>735582457
K-kinda does, prostitution doesn't w-work that way. Also, I always g-go dutch.

So get off your low horse; even if I wanted to fuck you, I wouldn't accept so much as a tip.

And I don't.

>wont post nudes

worthless thread

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heyas

>>735580477
hey alice throughout the past few years ive been having what i call "surface thoughts" because theyre quieter than the voice i think in and i dont actively think them. i forget them quickly but occasionally they make me very emotional. these thoughts are typically things like "your connection is lost"/"you cant go back"/"its the same"/yadda yadda. whatre your thoughts? feel free to ignore this if youre overloaded <3

>>735582250
Yeah I think you are right about it being a little bit of both. Thanks for the response, It's something i needed to get out there. But despite it not being a huge issue in my life or anything I know my friends would judge me for asking. It was my first "real" relationship so there are a few things I'm still trying to work out. It seems less healthy to just never think about it ever.

Also I checked out your stream and you have a cute pupper

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>>735582559
A f-few people got help, s-so it isn't worthless <4

>>735582607
I m-mean, that sounds fairly typical f-for normal people. Everyone h-has auditory hallucinations occasionally.

If you find it is interfering with your life, go to a doctor. Otherwise, relatively normal.

>>735582627
T-thank you, her name is Nano <4
Because she is so smol.

>>735582452
The First Lady of the United States of America has posted noodz

I'll get your noodz, Alice. Mark my words

I'll leave you to your counseling now

>>735582452

>T-try someone with less of a sense of self worth.


How can you consider yourself a psychologist when telling someone to go take advantage of someone who doesn't value themselves?

>>735582022
But isn't talking to yourself outloud a sign of insanity?

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>>735582677
G-good luck.

>>735582701
G-got a nice little piece of p-paper that says it.

Also, because that was clearly ghoulish overkill. Ghoulish overkill, s-summer!

>>735582703
No. D-don't buy into hollywood myths please.

If you have a 8 year degree why do you look so young?

>>735582043
obvs. still staying here though

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>>735582778
S-same reason you do, I suppose. M-moisturizing <4

Do you have a particular lotion you use? You look nice.

>>735582781
It is m-me though, dummy.

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>>735582552
You are very pretty in my oppinion, so forgive me for asking, but do you post nudes?

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>>735580477
I don't know if this falls under psychology, but anyway. I have an issue getting motivated. First it was school, everyone told me to get an education so i don't end up serving fried in McDonald's, i skipped classes and got expelled, don't know why, just didn't feel like going, i saw no reason to. Than i stayed at my mothers house for like 3 years, she got fed up, and said she'll cut of my connection if don't find a job, again i just procrastinated and got cut off, didn't really mind. This same process repeated over and over and now i ended at my grandmothers house, she's like 80, probably dead soon, and i still can't find motivation to find a a job.

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>>735582852
No, s-sorry, not an attention whore <4

>>735582881
Have y-you been to a doctor? That s-sounds pretty typical f-for someone with anhedonia or clinical depression.

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dendenden

>>735582834
I didnt post a picture. Also no i dont use a lotion but i do use a pumice stone. Keeps my skin good and soft. Also i doubt the authenticity of your claims of being a psychologist

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>>735582985
I'll h-have to try that <4

Hi there helpy!

Nothing to argue about today, just wanted to say hello. Thread is almost done anyway.

Bye!

>>735582917
Well i thought you were a sodding doctor. What's anhedonia? What are he signs of clinical depression? I might need to check the insides of my head.

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Oh well. Here we are at the end of the thread.
If anyone has further questions to ask, please contact me in the following ways:

Email: [email protected]
Steam: Aneki Margatroid
Skype: alicemargatroid2
Patreon (for my schedule): alicemargatroid
Twitch: celtyplays
Twitter: celtyplays
Youtube: celtyplays
Chat: https://anekiho.me/chat2

F-from the bottom of m-my infinite heart,
Alice2 <4

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>>735583092
I am a p-psychologist, n-not a psychiatrist. Please c-contact a doctor, or if you c-cannot afford one, email m-me and I will pay so you can go to one <4

Alice out!
*vanishes*

>>735583026
.....i do what you do but on /adv/. I tell people im a psychologist to but im not. I also namefag when i do it. Im 23 and m. My situation is shity and i wont being able to start of my psychology degree for years to come. So you have any advice on how to start if yoy really do have yours?
xPumiceStoneGuy

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>>735583129
Thanks, friend

>>735583092
Wait anhedonia again? We need some new diagnoses. Like sociopath or oedipus complex. That would be fun!

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>>735580477
What a coincidence since I vistied my doctor about an hour ago regarding my depression. He was about to give me an appointment with a pshychologist but she was ill, so all he could offer me was some therapy bullshit regarding "how to identify problems in life and move on."

I just want to try antidepressants and see if it works or not, if it doesn't I'll try to become an alcoholic, and if I fail at that I will just man up and kill myself knowing I tried everything.

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>>735583220
"antidepressants" are a class of over 70 medications. You can't "try" antidepressants and see if "it" works or not.

You need to meticulously try many many combinations to find ones that work.

>>735580477
Do you speak Spanish?
In that case...
Tengo miedo, voy a entrar a la escuela preparatoria, pero creo que mi promedio me pasó a joder todo...

I'm scared, I go to the high school, but, my... score? (I dunno how to say promedio) my score fuck all

(Sorry for my excellent English)

Alice-chan, do you actually stutter like that in real life?

Can you give me one good reason not to kill myself?

What's up Alice, I got fired recently which meant I couldn't shoot my movie, which meant when I went on vacation with my girlfriend I was super grumpy the whole time. Now I spend my days applying for jobs and doing freelance work and it's getting harder and harder to want to get out of bed and live. I also have bad sleeping habits and I feel like my girlfriend isn't there for me because she only replies with "I'm sorry honey" when I tell her how I feel, and if I bottle it up she gets sad that I don't talk to her, and then she ends up crying because I tell her what's wrong and she feels bad that I feel that way. What do?

>>735583752
Ok, I'm not the OP...
but I love you...
Now you have a reason

Jævla untermensch

>>735583752
There is none, just fucking do it.

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You're up early, Alice.

You know, I was thinking of you the other day. Remembering those old days, back when nothing really seemed to matter. Found a cover of Sorioro Days, you see, and I never realized how much the lyrics seemed to apply to me.

I'm doing okay now. I just want you to know that. I don't curse my fate anymore. I'm not afraid. I'm going to get the help I need, that I know that I'm worth now. I spent so long trying to help others, believing I didn't need it, that I was fine. I guess you really can't see stuff like that up close. I do miss those days; I look back on them and I see innocence. Stepping into the light was scary, and I did lose some for it, but I gained so much more.

>>735584243
>>735583999
B-but... I love Anon

>>735583752
You litteraly have none. That's it, life is pointless, you're nothing but a bunch of atoms that already lived long ago and will bu used to form new lives again. But that's not intresting, is it ?
What matters is that you're here, trying to find a reason not to kill yourself, I think it means you're somehow still trying not to die, which in turn implies you want to enjoy life "again" ? Maybe I'm just wrong, but wanting to die is not normal, you're a living creature with a survival instinct, although your existence is pointless, you were born for the sole purpose of procreating, of helping in the development of the species. Living a life devoid of pleasures and joy is really not intresting, if you can't have any of these, seek help, that's not normal.

>>735580477
Why do other men always try and challenge me in some way?

>>735584551
B-b-b-but JUST FUCKING DO IT YOU FUCKING QUEER CUNT

Where the fuck is OP?

>>735584992
She will do another thread this afternoon

>>735584992
She left to go to work, read the thread.

Out of all the trash thats posted on /b/, these threads are definitely the weirdest.

> be me
> pothead loser student
> decide to better myself
> pick goals to reach and better myself
> have reached most of them, while remaining a loser pothead
> still a student
> don't really feel like smoking, but also everything is mostly boring, so why not?
I guess I need to keep myself busy now?