ITT: things you hate about sex >when her ass smells like

>When the dog bites my foot

>when my finger cramps up

>when i hear the cops coming

> when I nut up that pussy real good but it's my dog

>when Stacy is fucking Chad because I'm autist beta

When the kid I'm babysitting's parents show up early.

> when I can't get my partner off and she eventually leaves me for someone who is more attractive and has larger genitals
> haha

>When I tell my mom to get off and make me some eggs

>>735017641

"When her ass smells like shit" yeah like your (men's) assholes always smell of fucking roses and sunshine.
"When she don't suck" yeah like your penis always tastes good and doesn't stink, if you wanna talk about smelly asses.

>>735017641
>when she has no dick

>>735018128
/thread

>When she says her dad is dead and I can't figure out who was phone

I like it when her asshole isn't clean, it feels extra dirty

>when your dick's bone breaks

>>735018186
>I can't figure out who was phone
?????

When you bust too soon and feel like a cuck.

>>735017641
>when I wake up

>>735017641
When she starts to bark

>>735017641
>when she doesn't actually exist

>>735018186
????????????

>>735018000
When people getting girls and I can't even get trips.

>when you ask her to hit you and she doesn't

>it's about to be your first time only to find out it's a tranny

>>735018392
>When she wakes up

>>735017641
>>when her ass smells like shit
Well what the fucks it supposed to smell like, roses?

when she tells you about all the things she's done with other men, but prefers missionary and cuddling with you.
having to practically beg for a blowjob, but being expected to eat her out on command.

mace

>>735017641
>When you're getting ready to fuck her but you get benised in the bumbum

>when he pulls my hair by putting his weight on it
>holding in farts
>jaw gets tired from bj

>>735017641
True. An unsightly asshole is bad enough, but a smelly one is the killer.

She doesn't have to look at yours while doing it, AND she doesn't have to mentally maintain an erection that wants to run and hide from that snarly black hole of funk.

Buttholes look better stretched tightly around cocks.

I only get fucked by guys now, so yeah I wash my ass inside and out and keep it nice and pink and smooth. Bitches are nasty, and have terrible hygiene. For fucks sake, think of how many refer to their genitals by the words "down there". Bitch if you're so nasty all you can do is refer to the general direction of that reeky mop, you need to familiarize yourself with your guts. Disgusting.

>>735017892
When does this happen? My tongue cramps up tho tbh

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>>735018500
>>735018000
Trips dubs single 0

>when I realise life is but a dream

>>735018653
Kek

>>735018653
Just holy fucking kek

>>735018672
Skin?

>>735018675
>when she tells you about all the things she's done with other men,
Sometimes i find it hot sometimes i feel cuck

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>>735018653
OD Kek

>>735017641
Not cumming for some reason

>when she tells you to hurry up because it hurts and shes pretty much dead down there because of the medication
I used to love sex but i still fap every day

>>735019471
I can't cum at all because of Zoloft

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>>735018653
Kek mate

>>735018302
>>735018426
newfag alert

>>735017641
>ITT: things you hate about sex
That other people have it and I don't

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>>735019552

>>735019876
Boy

>>735019552
its pretty frustrating because the girl before her, i think only kept me around for that

>>735019956
shes on paxil and buspar

>>735019987
For sex or Zoloft?

>>735020048
sex, we never hung out much other than that

>When she's pegging me, but stops well before I am close to coming and says, "That's about how long it takes you to finish."

>>735019221
Maybe for a little bit, but shit comes from that hole, so it's always going to end up smelling like it.

>>735020181
Do u use condors?

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>>735018128
>>735018178
Who the hell let the lesbian liberal feminist in here?
>seriously though
TOGTFO

>>735018128
U mad, whitegirl?

>>735018128
Got me to reply/10
Good b8 m8

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>>735018128
Looks like we hurt somebody's fee fees. Better call the waambulance.

>>735020270
Do you mean condoms? No. I've had a vasectomy. She was talking about me finishing in her ass, btw.

>>735020270
No, man. They bite hard.

>>735017641
>When she doesn't like making out so initiating sex is awkward without it and your cock is too thick and she has a small jaw so she can barely get it in her mouth and the little she can is all teeth and she doesn't enjoy oral because she's Fucking numb from years of violent masturbation and she doesn't cum from penetration and starts complaining that it hurts too much after five minutes and she just asks you if you're going to cum soon repeatedly until you finally do, completely ruining any enjoyment you were trying to squeeze it off this awful experience.

Why the Fuck did I marry this woman

>>735017641
>when she don't suck dick

The proper verb is "doesn't", you fucking nigger

>>735021158
Marriage is gay

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When I can't keep it up. I'm a sex god with new women, but struggle to get hard or stay hard with a gf after around a year of dating.

>>735021997
Dude you too???

>>735021997
Use Viagra

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>>735022431
Yeah. It really sucks.

I think the only cure is no fap/porn, but I'm hooked. My gf is hot, too. When we go out, people check her out, while I check out other chicks. On the sly, of course. Going to music festivals and traveling together is torture, because I'm born to slay strange.

I'm fat and have a small dick so I'm typically limited to girl on top. I try to eat pussy as much as I can to make up for it. I don't know if I'm any good at oral. Bitches wouldn't tell me if I was bad.

>>735022944
I should. Expensive, though.

>>735021997
Slight variation.. can't keep it up with someone new. I can pound 6's til the sun comes up though.

>>735017641
everything is hyped to the vanishing point. sex is too overrated and feels like fapping to regular porn, those guys who fall head over heels for women are absolut cucks

>>735021997
I have the opposite problem. Ive been married for 12 years now and still cum too fast.

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When you bend her over for some doggy style and there's still a few scraps of toilet paper stuck to her asshole.