hey b, what animal could you take down in a battle to the death?

>>733744041
Chicken. They're stupid, weak, and the brush would fuck up their momentum. Reason? I'm hungry.

I'd fight a deer, stabbing it to death with it's own antlers after I've ripped those off it's head, barehanded.

a shark. i dont even have to fight it.

>>733744041
any non flying animal and even some flying
>burn the forest

My neighbor's dog

>>733744520
A deer would fuck you up dude

>>733744935
How?
You can only use your own hands, so no picking up sticks and making a fire.

>>733744041
Mosquito. I'd smash that fucker into a thin paste.. show em' who's boss..

>>733744520
Not a hunter i guess? You can just rip those fuckers off, they are in their skull, cant rip those off unless you are crazy strong.

>>733744041

Bunny. I'd round up a bunch of other bunnies and have them gang-rape it to death.

>>733744520
you're gonna die, painfully, embarrassingly. just make sure to post vid.

File: Wing Chun vs Pittbull.gif (1MB, 260x146px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 260x146px

>>733744041
I could take down a pack of wolves.
All you have to do is side step it's highly telegraphic lunge from a highly predictable sprint.

I'd just dodge and counter their attacks until there's none left to fight.
Take any opening I get, rinse and repeat.

>side step, let it lunge itself into a tree or rock, whatever will cause it blunt force trauma
>side step, let it lunge itself into something it can impale itself on
>follow up with a strike to one of it's legs to break it
or
>follow up with a strike to it's trachea
>create some distance
>rinse and repeat

>>733744041
Probably a turtle a 2 year old blind turtle with a bum leg

>>733747313
Would still probably run though if it broke free from my judo leg hold

>>733747189
what are you going to do with the 2 wolfs at your back the one that charges from the front isn't the one that attacks, not only that a wolf is twice the size of that dog

I would take down the most dangerous of animals, a human.

>>733747588
Like with anal sex or a bj?

>>733744041

I get the feeling I could choke out a penguin pretty easily. Fake birds can't even fly. Fuck em.

>>733747511
I will have completed my dodge and or counter by the time any of the other wolves try to attack me, and after countering them, I'll be ready for whatever's left, until there are no more left.

>a wolf is twice the size of that dog
It's not size that matters, it's speed, timing, efficiency, and skill.

>>733744041
Ill use my hands to grab a gun and shoot it.

>>733747654
both

>>733747189
kick it in the snout

>>733747719
You're in a forest, buddy. You'd need to use your hands to make tools to obtain the materials and then make tools to use to process the materials, process the materials, not to mention the bullets, and then use your hands to grab a gun and shoot it.

>>733747673
This is fucking assasins creed or some shit, they are not going to attack one by one. Now the question was what animal, not what pack of animals. And even then i seriously doubt your ability to kill a wolf with your bare hands.

File: F2.large.jpg (109KB, 1280x855px) Image search: [Google]

109KB, 1280x855px

>>733747673
a wolfs top speed is 37 mph, and they hunt by encircling you and have at least 3 attacking you at the same time from all sides before you have the time to dodge the one you think is attacking you the other to have torn your ankles and are returning to the circle around you

>>733748375
>they are not going to attack one by one.
It doesn't matter, they can't attack you from every possible angle you can escape from, and they're not likely to attack you at exactly the same time from all possible directions, haven't you watched BBC?

One wolf would be even easier.

>>733744041
i could only take down a woman, those filthy animals.

>>733748588
No but they will see a weak spot whilst your distracted with another one and go for the attack.

One wolf would still fuck you up

>>733748401
>a wolfs top speed is 37 mph,
It's in a forest, and I'm allowed to move around, them wolves ain't going to have enough room to run in a straight line to get to top speeds.

>you and have at least 3 attacking you at the same time from all sides
Except with some simple maneuvering, you can make it so less are attacking you at the same time, and like I said, they don't often attack at exactly the same time, leaving openings. And only 3 is nothing, you have plenty of angles to use.

>before you have the time to dodge the one you think is attacking you the other to have torn your ankles
There's plenty of time.
You just have to dodge in a way as to account for all that are attacking you, it's okay that you lacked the knowledge and comprehension of this, you aren't the experienced on, anyway. It's good that you're learning.

>>733749073
>No but they will see a weak spot whilst your distracted with another one and go for the attack.
By that time I'd be finished with the "distraction."
You're pretending like I'm going to go into a 1 vs 5 fight like I would be a 1 vs 1 fight.
Counters take less than 1 second. Complex counters take less than 2 seconds.
Even more complex counters will take longer, but still account for all of the other attacks.

2 wolves is easy shit, 1 wolf is nothing.

i could beat the shit out of a sloth

File: 71CC80F2-A0F7-47FB-9463-BB70CB56B959-8105-00000CCBE9271E74.png (415KB, 597x542px) Image search: [Google]

415KB, 597x542px

>>733745224
>2017
<Not having fire hands
>MFW

File: C1DC3CED-636A-440F-ACF4-BDD2FF791BB7-988-000002DC5480B44A.jpg (104KB, 840x700px) Image search: [Google]

104KB, 840x700px

>>733747430
>Grabbing the bum leg
Nigga wut r u doing¿

Gorilla with a rear naked choke

File: tmp_9502-IMG_20170508_183732790936024.jpg (100KB, 960x806px) Image search: [Google]

100KB, 960x806px

>>733744041
A hippo

This is me

File: IMG_0847.gif (2MB, 500x600px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 500x600px

>>733750480
Come at me nigga

>>733750457
Haha yeah man, you could totally take down a gorilla.

>>733750648
Everythings gotta breath, just gotta choke it out

>>733748588
All it would take is for one of them to snag an arm or a leg, and you're done.

File: tmp_19031-14953652082161539884659.jpg (40KB, 640x735px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 640x735px

>>733748978

>>733744041

File: bernard.jpg (27KB, 400x264px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 400x264px

>>733744041
a saint bernard

>>733749246
your acting like you wolfs aren't use to running in the woods, i almost never go in the woods near my house but can still run top speed in them for a while. A normal humans reaction time is 200 ms a dogs is far less then that, you can infer that a wolf the ancestor of the dog and adapted to kill is even less, you have no idea what you are talking about

>>733744041
A hamster. I would pick it up and throw it at a rock or a tree until its ded

since most of us are speaking out of our ass's i will just claim that i am this guy reincarnated https://huckberry.com/journal/posts/man-kills-grizzly-with-hands-and-teeth

>>733744041
A roach

File: terra-formars-racism.jpg (185KB, 870x836px) Image search: [Google]

185KB, 870x836px

>>733751791
>try's to kill a roach
> ends up being one of this niggers

>>733751791
Dat not animal das buggo

>>733745312
Mosquitos are the deadliest animals actually. It'd just give you malaria and West Nile virus and fly away.

>>733747189
OMG you think life is literally like a video game.

>>733751244
>you have no idea what you are talking about
no u

File: gorgeous rooster.png (413KB, 480x484px) Image search: [Google]

413KB, 480x484px

>>733744323
this "chicken" would blow your brains out (pic related)

>>733744041
that's just a cute little baby doggo, it would lick you to death

File: america love it or leave it.jpg (390KB, 3072x2048px) Image search: [Google]

390KB, 3072x2048px

>>733744041
I'm 6'3" 240 (built), I've seen Grizzly Bears at the zoo. They're not *that* big. I could take one down if I had to.

However most big wild cats are way too strong for me.

Humans are feeble, when you're this size. Not many men are larger/stronger/tougher than you. And yes, men like do carry firearms, and can draw quicker, too (and utilize our firearms in the most efficient tactical manners).

Most Navy SEALS are my size tbh. We're the cream of the crop.

File: c4a.jpg (23KB, 600x484px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 600x484px

>>733752321
> no u

>>733750569
a hippo could kill any human being easily.

even The Rock, Dog the Bounty Hunter, Chuck Norris (in his prime), Jet Li, Bruce Lee, Arnold Schwarzeneggar et al. would be decimated by a hippo.

>>733744041
a coon, easily

>>733753124
nope. raccoons can tear you apart, and many of them have rabies.

I tried to wrestle a housecat once.

It didn't go well. Those needle teeth and claws, and they're very very strong.

Don't try and wrestle them.

>>733744041
I'd take on a cheetah, with a swift headbutt

>>733753246
Id throw it a crack stem, then kick it in the nuts

>>733753346
if your use to pain it ain't that bad but they will skin any body part that gets close to there claws

>>733749246
Jesus fucking christ the autism is strong with you

>>733744041
bare hands? Shit OP, we, as a species, haven't used our own hands to battle animals in about 2 million years. Our ability to best animals comes from our ability to create and use tools. We are woefully inadequate when it comes to fighting animals with our bare hands.

>>733753513
i'm used to pain but the cat won. I have many scars from it. to this day that cat and I still don't get along, I give it a wide berth.

Had to choke out my neighbors mastiff when I was 13 and it attacked me. Fucker lunged and latched onto the inside of my forearm. I just rolled into him and started squeezing. Neighbor came out screaming that I was gonna kill the dog. He pulled the dog from me and called the cops. They show up asked what happened, I told them and showed them my arm. They took the dog away and put it down.

>>733752817
>I could take one down if I had to.
No, no you couldn't.

>>733753680
He is obviously joking but if confronted he will say he is dead serious. >>733753765

>>733747189
This is about as stupid an animal to pick as a forest gorilla. You stand absolutely zero chance of even injuring anything with either option. Come to think of it... you'd be about as successful fighting an elephant.

>>733754189
Gorillas still gotta breath. All I gotta donis choke him out. Cant breath, cant fight

>>733753873
i use to own 2 cats. usually people bitch about how giving cats a bath will make you loose an arm or some shit, i would always give them a bath every year when they started to stink they would claw and bite at my arm the whole time but i always won at the end and wouldn't let go till them fuckers smelled like perfume

>>733753765
Yeah thats the fun part. Any nigger can take down liek 90% of all animals if you give him a sword och a knife to carry.

look I weigh 600lbs. As long as its smaller than me I grab it and fall it, its dead.
I may get injured but i dont think i'd die.

>>733753246
I've had a raccoon sit in my lap. Things are incredibly dense. I wouldn't want to have fought it, though if necessary, I believe I would win.

Ex-girlfriend's parents used to feed them cat kibble, so they were semi-tame. They'd crawl all over you as long as you were calm and had kibble.

File: MrMustachio.jpg (31KB, 540x405px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 540x405px

>>733752817
6/10. mediocre meme, friend.

File: 2f2a8d14226ba46f8f6bc7dc35371f39.jpg (40KB, 600x450px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 600x450px

>>733744041
this deadly motherfucker right here. just grab it, throw it against a wall, and before it falls, punch it into the wall

>>733754379
A gorilla is so strong it would literally grab you and pull you off. No human on the face of the planet has the strength to maintain a choke hold on one of those things. Male gorillas are 6'3", 490 lbs of muscle. Dense, dense muscle.

Think what the hulk does to loki for an example of what would happen to you if you tried to choke one of those beasts out.

>>733754379
if you really want to go ball to the wall insane here why not say you'd be any fucker from the weasle family https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvlalDNxccw

>>733744520
Had a friend get gored by a deer, if it isn't the antlers that get you it'll be the hooves.

>>733744041
If there was a close water source, fish.

>>733755404
i remember this webm of a gorilla casually walking while this guy was right next to it filming, and the gorilla just grabbed his leg and made him fall to the ground like he was twig, all while just casually walking and didnt even look at him

According to Sea World, a gorilla has six times the upper body strength of an adult human. Assuming an average person can bench press his body weight, a 300-pound gorilla is capable of pressing approximately 1,800 pounds.

>>733755285
You can win a fight against these. I've done it. Bastard bit me and I threw it. It did not deal with the impact with the wall very well.

>>733749435
boy, when have you ever fought a wolf? They'd take you out as soon as they reached you. Wolves can take down bison. I'm going to take a wild guess and assume you are neither stronger nor faster than a bison.

>>733754913
You're going to starve before they start trusting you, Pavlov.

>>733750854
boi it could crush your skull with one hand. It would reach behind and take you the fuck out

>>733755404
I dont care how strong it is, its still gotta breath

>>733754473
I have a bad scar thanks to a cat. I feel you there

>>733754473
You know... you can usually calm a cat in a bath right down by placing your hand on their clavicle between their legs and have them not scratch or bite you. I've bathed at least 20 different cats like that and have no scratches from cat bathing incidents. Give it a go next time you want your pussy all clean.

>>733756423
you gotta breath too https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4amRA0jl0qI

>>733757208
As long as it doesnt know any choke hold i think ill be in the clear

>>733744323
You would win
>>733744520
You would get fucked up
>>733744689
Win lol
>>733745221
Win probably, depends on the breed
>>733745312
Win the short term battle, lose to west Nile or some shit.
>>733745475
Satisfying win
>>733747189
Flawless obviously
>>733747313
>>733747430
Ahhhh yes. I see that you know your judo well.
>>733747588
50/50 brave man
>>733747668
Win
>>733748978
Win
>>733751099
Win, dogs are a tough fight though
>>733751617
Win, excellent technique
>>733751791
Win
>>733750569
Lose
>>733753246
Win
>>733753369
>in forest
Win
>>733754033
BRUH same shit happened to me, except I put it to sleep
>>733755285
Win

>>733744041
Most dogs are actually pretty easy to beat hand to hand if you're not afraid of it. They have exactly one weapon that they have to get well within arms reach to use. Also their rib cages are surprisingly fragile.

>>733744041
I think I could take out a goat

>>733754379
>All I gotta donis choke him out.
Putting a gorilla in a successful choke hold is a dramatically more difficult proposition than you're imagining. Also in order for it to work, you have to squeeze hard enough for it to cut off blood flow to the brain rather than simply air flow, or else you'll be torn apart long before it gets anywhere near losing consciousness.

File: fgdsg.jpg (70KB, 601x600px) Image search: [Google]

70KB, 601x600px

>>733757843
lol shut up. in reality you'd get fucked up.

>>733752817

>Most Navy SEALS are my size tbh

No, they're not.