Sorry for the long post, but I need legal help. At a local park,

early bump, sorry

rofl, you deserved it.

>>731933661
It's not about deserve, it's about the law. Can I sue him or not?

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>>731933122
Man you're a special kind of stupid aren't you?

>>731933122
If you live in California, then maybe, the juries there are big enough SJW cucks to go for it. Anywhere else and they will laugh you out of court.

Nigga got beat up by an 11 year old

Kek of the day

How the hell did an 11 year old beat you up? And where were the parents?

>>731934274
I live in England.

>>731934284
>>731934298
He most likely had martial arts training, he was also quite strong. I have no idea where his parents were.

>>731934450
OP he's 60lbs and 11 years old, he i not "quite strong".
You can tell by the pic that you got your ass beat by a weak childlet.

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Toasting in a troll bread and you stupid fucks are all feeding it

>>731933122
He's cute, did you feel his soft and smooth little boy thighs gripping you and you fainted because of the blood going elsewere?
and you "relieved" yourself via having a wet dream?

>>731933122
Ultimately the law, whether you think it's black and white, which it's not, is determined by a person. The judge or jury.

I know you think because battery says if they went beyond whatever means to defend themselves, you should get whatever. Well, that means someone needs to determine that's the case.

No one is going to look at a 11 yr old defending their bike as battery no matter what he did to you. If you are both under 16 then maybe. Even then, you will probably get laughed out. It's worth a shot though. The least they can say is no.

Youre forgetting he's underage and not liable for the same types of laws as probably, you. You won't win. And will make you look even more stupid.

>>731933122

test

Saw same type of post yesterday
gtfo faggot >>731933122

>>731933122
If this isn't a troll you need to reevaluate ur entire being

>>731934774
You're gross, I passed out because my body couldn't contract upwards. "Little thighs" can do a lot of damage sicko.

>>731934799
Eh just what I thought, I'm well over 16 don't worry. Could I sue his parents instead?

>>731933122
Self-rationalization is the second-strongest human drive.

You want to sue (criminal and civil courts are different venues) an 11 year old for physical and mental abuse after you tried to steal his belongings?

What sort of drugs are you on, OP?

>>731935217
UNDERAGEFAG DETECTED
and if not, why the fuck steal from a stupid fucking faggot kid.

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> 2017
> not trying to chew your way through the boy

OP how did you fuck up so bad?

>>731933122
lawfag here, attorney at law.

i'll bill you for the advice later but here's your answer:

you will lose your counter suit.

here's why: he's 11.

as to battery, it's possible (in theory) he used too much force, but as said he's 11. no go.

emotional distress, motherfucker you created the situation

and i assume the allegation has nothing to do with this shit. this screams i tried to touch his penor and he beat me up. what kinda shitty pedofile are u?

>>731933122
you got off lucky, id have broke your fingers with a hammer.
i hope the kid and his dad find you and tag team your ass you dirty little thief and from a child especially.
wait till the boys in prison hear about it and the general public your going to get fucking battered

>>731935306
Are you denying that it was physical and mental abuse?

>>731935405
I'm 28, the reasons aren't important.

>>731935436
I couldn't open my mouth to chew unfortunately, also his legs were wrapped around my waist which is nowhere near my mouth.

>>731935565
>wrapped around ur waist

cmon pedo-anon. be honest w what happened here

>>731933737
no your going to jail and how can you even begin to think your the victim in this situation.
>i imagine the kid shouting "stop right there criminal scum!" and tackling your fat neckbeard ass to the ground and beating you

>>731935468
It would be a suit, not a counter-suit. One can not counter-sue in criminal court.

The ignorance in this thread is layers-thick.

>>731933122

Thank you OP. It's great to see a fucking asshole nigger thief get what he deserves.

Make sure you hire a lawyer. Pay his entire retainer. Then lose the case to "self defense in an attempt to rob with intent" and "attempted assault" and "crime against a minor", etc.

Frankly, you're lucky I'm not the prosecutor. I'd charge you with 18 different things, convict you on about 7, and make sure you aren't eligible for probation for at least 6 years.

And I could do it. Scum shouldn't mingle with human beings.

>>731935565
>>731935306

Are you denying that you are mentally ill?

>>731935565

A 28 year old man couldn't break the grip of a 60 lb 11 yr old boy?

Just kys now before they fuck you over in court, you're gonna get rail roaded

>>731935565
im not denying the physical abuse you deserved.
the mental abuse you deserve.
you tried to steal from a child and if your from the uk and over 16 and hes under there gonna lock you clean up.

Find him poison him

>>731935733

uh pretty sure i read that the boy had his own suit and assuming it's not just criminal it would be a counterclaim. if not then op could choose to file a suit as u said, but itll be laughed out a court by the jury

>>731935468
>>731935638
Okay, I admit one alleged allegation is that I tried to sexually assault him but that is easily disproved.

>>731935871
I'd like to see you try, tough guy.

>>731935879
No-one deserves physical or mental abuse.

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Answer honestly: Are you a nigger?
Why did you feel the urge to steal from a child?
Why not just leave him alone and work for the things you'd like to have?

>>731936084
you tried to steal from a minor.
your 28.
you hit him and knocked out a tooth.
did the kid deserve to have your stupid ass to steal from him? no but you did it anyway.
trust me you got off lucky, when the prisoners find out they'll do much much worse.
you shouldnt be a part of society, its the people like you that make this world a shitty place.

>>731933122

Best guess for this image: cool

>>731936084
i agree with you op... but others might say something like "if you steal from an 11 year old and then try to fight him, you deserve mental and physical abuse"

im not saying these things btw, it's the other anons in this thread

>>731936130
1) No, I'm white.
2) Who cares why? Spur of the moment.
3) Easier said than done.

>>731936233
I didn't admit anything, I said allegedly. It did not happen. His legs were wrapped around my body, that's how he knocked me out.

>>731936084

And the kid will sue for emotional damages due to being assaulted by you, no matter what, you're gonna lose and you're gonna lose hard

>>731933122
Either this is bait or you are one sorry, dispicable excuse for a human being OP.

>>731933122

the only legal questions you should have are what's the slowest and most painfully method you can legally obtain to kill yourself with.

>>731936329
I was panicked, he was crushing my ribs of course I hit him and knocked out a tooth you would too.

>>731936385
Thank you.

>>731936420
kids not gonna sue for shit. why? bc op is stealing from children, theres nothing else to take from him

>>731936386
right actually i retract my statement earlier, what you do deserve is to go pay your debt to society and learn your lesson.

>>731936468
lawfag again, attorney at law.

don't talk to op like that! without people like op i dont have a job.

so i say to you op, keep on molesting that 11 year old or whatever the hell else you do

>>731935982
What family brings a case against someone who tried to steak from their kid instead of going to the police? This makes no sense unless OP knew the family and they specifically declined to involve LEO's for some odd reason.

OP sounds like a sociopath. Jail time would have been a good thing.

>>731934217
you don't realise how retarded you look don't you?

You got beaten by an eleven year old
heh.

>>731934450

Someone in England shouldn't be saying shit like "60lbs" and "lawyer"

>>731936582

OP is stealing from a little kid, how do you think he's going to pay you? and i don't think a PD would want this case.

>>731933122
Hey OP, when you are in prison i hope a big fucking nigga fucks you up so hard that you'll shit and spit cum for the rest of your life.

>>731936587
u can do both actually. but popo def the way to gogo bc theres no money to take from, uh, c3opo

>>731936420
Emotional damages? The kid was a litle psychopath, probably enjoyed continuing to squeeze an unconscious person.

>>731936582
*Allegedly

>>731936680
If I say 4 stone instead, no-one will have any idea what I'm talking about.

>>731936697
pd doesnt have a choice. itll go to the alternate pd or the panel if there's a conflict and trust me, the pd dont care. they deal with so many retards all the time

>>731936733
yea. allegedly. ok op, whatever u say

>>731936478
no i wouldnt and heres 2 reasons why...
1. im not a thief that shits disgusting
2. ESPECIALLY I WOULD NEVER STEAL FROM A CHILD
like i say i take it back that you deserve abuse that wasnt right of me and i apologize but that kid didnt deserve to have you rob and attack him did he but you did it anyway.
be a man for the 1st time in your life and shut the fuck up about trying to sue him and accept what you have done is wrong and pay your debt to society and try your hardest to right the wrong you have done.

>>731933122
You got beat by an 11 year old. There is a witness that can confirm that.
Just deny any wrongdoings and claim he assaulted you out of the blue without provocation.

Make him the aggressor. Without other witnesses it is your word against his. Acquittal follows.

>>731936733
I wouldn't fucking blame him OP, you're the one stealing from him when he did jack shit to you, fuck off with playing the victim

>>731933122
Fuck you, thief. He should have killed you.

>>731936802
no. that;s not how it works. op has the burden to prove hes innocent and when that sweet mouthed little boy gets on the stage and starts blowing away the jury with the tale about how he got fucked by op, its game over

>>731933122
>At a local park, I tried to steal an 11 year old boy's bicycle and ipad.

fucking niggers. hope you get raped.

>>731936802
Look at you defending his actions and trying to turn it around. your dispicable.

>>731936802

I like this

Say the kid was taunting you with his items and say that you told him to fuck off and he attacked you

>>731936801
I agree with you, I was all fucked up I wouldn't usually do that. But as you say, I did not deserve the abuse and I shold be able to sue.

>>731936802
This is a pretty good fucking idea. Only problem was that the kid was the one who called the police.

>>731937212
lawyerfag here again, attorney at law

anon, you fuckin deserved it god damn it. who gets beat up by an 11 year old!?

anyway, thatll be $15,000.00 for my services. if you need to raise some money im sure theres a park near where u live

you deserved it nigger. i broke law once and i will remember it to the end of my life. just don't brake laws

>>731936909
I'm white.

>>731936907
Not even he went that far. His story is that I allegedly "tried to touch him" and when he was aggressive, I instead tried to steal his stuff. Then he beat me.

>>731933122
get fucked, you thieving faggot

>>731937344
Funny.

>>731937353
Laws are made to be broken, and again I'm white.

>>731937372
no joke and ive been doing this for years now- primarily criminal.

if a client told me that the 11 year old boy was lying abt being touched and it was in the police report (unless there was something really screaming to the otherwise) i would KNOW u touched the boy.

havent seen the disco or ur file, but that's just my experience. kids that young are rarely savvy enough to make up something like that. he oculdve been mistaken, i just believe he believed u wanted his little pen0r

>>731937344
Just accept that you fucked up and learn from it. Criminals have no legal recourse and you are a criminal. A petty criminal at that. I'm a more successful criminal but I don't commit petty crimes and even I think you're scum.

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>>731937212
Here's a new line of questioning: Do you understand why what you did was wrong OP? Do you get why people are angry? Can you put yourself in the position of a pre pubescent boy who is assaulted by a grown man in the park for his bike? Do you understand why people want you to be punished?

>>731937577
i think u meant to respond to op?

>>731937577
Sorry this post was meant for
>>731937372
Obviously.

>>731933122
Just move on mate, you got off fucking lucky as

>>731937372
You may be white but you're still a dirty nigger

I'd off myself if an 11 year old beat me up

>>731937715
What this guy said

>>731937699
case hasnt been dispo'd yet. i can guess op has a pd, he's going to jail

>>731933122
itt: op is a broke ass nigger who thinks that because he was beat up while committing a crime he had the chance to win a law suit and not be poor

>>731937212
no you shouldnt be able to sue at all you caused the entire situation.
you are not the victim

>>731937535
That's a possibility, but I never physically touched him, he was the first person to make contact.

>>731937617
Yeah, I understand but nobody is seeing it from my shoes so why should I see it from theirs?

>>731937699
Lucky that I had my ribs broken and may have ptsd or some shit? And I may go to jail? So lucky.

>>731937702
this. you're stealing kid's shit and you think you're white? no, you're "white" and you belong in the ghetto.

>>731937846
Well it's lucky for the kid
:^)

>>731933122
Stick with your lawyer's advice. Considering the kid's age, it's unlikely that he will be held civilly liable for #1 and #2

>>731933122
Don't worry nigger. You're going to jail. Can't wait for the video to come out
This is what's going to happen to you. Everyday, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euQPqFhAmJE

>>731937846
You haven't given any context, all you've more or less said is what happened, sure, fair enough, but did you explain why?

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>>731933122
>At a local park, I tried to steal an 11 year old boy's bicycle and ipad.

Nigger detector is off the charts!!!!

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>>731937846
PTSD?
>WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
yeah and what about the kid whos worried now that some cunts going to try what you did again. fuck you op.

>>731933122
>Sorry for the long post, but I need legal help.
>I need legal help.
>legal help

>posts on /b/

>>731937846
>Yeah, I understand but nobody is seeing it from my shoes so why should I see it from theirs?

You're the assailant and causal factor in what happened. no one looks at it from your perspective bc you cant hire a real lawyer

>>731937846
Normal people can't feel empathy towards criminals, because we literally have no idea what motivates you to leap on an 11 year old kid and try to steal from him. Why would you do that? Normal minded people can't fathom why you would, so we can't be "seeing it from your shoes"

>>731937841
We are both victims, there's a good chance that he could have killed me if the passer by did not break it up.

>>731938025
Shit, I've already said I get anxious when seeing people resembling him. And I have trouble sleeping at night, this shit fucked me up. PTSD is possible.

>>731937212
>>This is a pretty good fucking idea. Only problem was that the kid was the one who called the police.

So? as far as you are concerned you do not know what misconceived idea got him to attack you. You can only guess that he found out he was in the wrong and made up his story to not get in trouble himself. Kids nowadays know they only have to shout pedo to get someone in trouble.

Get a decent lawyer.

>>731933122
Nigger, if I were you I'd pay up and shut up before my m8's found out I got fucked up by an 11yo.

But I'm not you. So go for it. I look forward to the headlines in the papers kek!

>>731937846
gotta be bait. no male is that pathetic to believe theyre the victim... even my worst clients that say they are a victim dont blame the actual victim, just their parents, rapist or whatever

>>731938160
Dude if an 11 year old can kill you with his legs you're not meant to live anyway.

IIT: OP plays the victim
Grab the popcorn

>>731935768
This post is hot

>>731938162
Fuck, lawyers are expensive. But this is a pretty good defense, my lawyer is so shit. Thanks!

>>731938243
I never said he wasn't a victim. We're both victims.

>>731938251
He probably had martial arts training. I'd like to see you try to escape.

>>731933122
hahahahahahahahahahaha

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHA

I would have punched you to death fucking moron, go get a job and buy a fucking ipad douchebag.

>>731938160
you are not the victim and how do you think the kid feels? your sat crying becausw you tried to steal from a kid and he fucked you up.
you sure the kids not worried about reprocussions?
you sure he feels safe on the streets anymore after you tried to rob him?
like i said op fuck you.

>>731933122
Things that literally never happened the thread

>>731938394
>We're both victims

no you're not dude. im telling you as an attorney your lack of remorse on any level is gonna hurt you. you need to say i fuked up even if you dont believe it bc the way u think ppl are gonna hate u

>>731938394
Use a fucking weapon before you try to steal someone's bike and iPad

>>731938318
Broken ribs, so hot... just be quiet.

>>731938499
I'll pretend at the trial, but here I can say whatever shit I like.

>>731933122
You deserved it you fucking theif. Too bad he didn't kill you

>>731938624
Cracked ribs aint shit. Walk it off pussy.

>>731938475
If he was worried about repurcussions he would have let go as soon as I was out and fucking pissed myself. He was obviously trying to kill me or seriously injure me, fuck him.

>>731938758
Sure, but having someone squeeze already cracked ribs? Most pain I've ever been in.

Stole any candy from a baby OP?

>>731938857
He tried once but the baby put him in a sleeper hold.

>>731938914
Kek kek kek!

>>731938914
nah that was the toddler, the baby was the one who almost killed him when it squeezed his finger

>>731933122
Stupid nigger. Thats what you get for stealing.

>>731939065
He probably sued for damages.

>>731938914
The kid was strong for his age, he was shirtless at the park and he had a 6 pack. That's probably why he went the "sexual abuse" angle, because he was shirtless. Obvious lie.

>>731933122
as soon as i see this in the news or hear of the police report im sending this entire thread in as evidence you weapona grade dickhead.
i fucking knew id find a use for my old laser printer
never throw shit away boys

>>731938394
And if they asked why you did not press charges, well you where, off course, very much ashamed to be beaten up by an 11 year old and would have rather quickly forget about it, but now they come after you with such heinous accusations you have no alternative.

Get that lawyer and press charges yourself asap.
And whatever you do, do not admit anything. expect them to pressure you.

>>731938848
and you tried to steal from a child and injured him. fuck you.
personally id have broke your fingers on the spot, i once stole a cig from my grandad and he broke my middle finger to teach me a lesson
he said i was lucky it was the 1 cig which equalled one finger.

>>731933122
You are the worst kind of scum, op.
Hope someone simply puts a knife inside you.

ITT; Scumbag fuckin criminals who steal from kids claim they're the victim of the child's viciously-trained-300-confirmed-gorillas-per-diamond thighs and seek to sue for emotional harm.

You are literally what's wrong with America. You're not a victim, you deserved it, if the kid had cracked your skull and left you retarded you would still deserve it, if he cut off your hands and left you permanently retarded you'd still fuckin deserve it.

You created this situation, not him and it's your fault, not his. Stop trying to blame other people cause you're a fuck up.

>>731939141
Thank you so much, wish I could have you as my lawyer man!

>>731939139
/b/ doesn't have an archive, pretty sure you need more. Plus, I have not said anything incriminating because I'm innocent.

>>731938848
Alright, you're either delusional or psychopathic, one of those is something which can be helped, so I'll explain it to you

>If he was worried about repurcussions he would have let go as soon as I was out and fucking pissed myself
How do you know he wasn't jsut hyped up on adrenaline? After all, someone tries to steal his iPad and bike, it gets intense

>We're both victims
Sure, he's definitely a victim, but how are you a victim of any degree? Well, a victim deserving of compensation. You attempted to steal his property, he fights back, you knock some teeth out, and he subdues you, maybe not realising you were unconscious.

On the other hand, you instigated the situation, assaulted a minor, and now demanding compensation. Now, this is where I am actually curious, how did you post this thread with the belief people would stand with you?

tl;dr OP is a major pussy

lol @ anyone taking this seriously. this is his fantasy. He jerks off to thoughts of being beat up by a little boy. Probably would love the thought of the little boy doing other things to him after he gets knocked unconscious. Let me guess OP, after he knocked you out he stripped you naked, right? I mean in your original fantasy. And then took pics. and he played with your dick a bit... and... and then he... um, excuse me for a min...

>>731939398
none of that is sound legal advice. the reason you dont like ur lawyer is bc u suck

>>731936458


oh it bait.

>>731939398
>because I'm innocent.
I don't know which is worse: the fact that you tried to rob an 11 year old and got the shit beat out of you or the fact that you think you're innocent.

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tfw, little boy in the picture is actually op

>>731933122
Anon, don't counter sue. If 4chan, the place where pedophiles, bestiality lovers and beheadings roam free, sees you as a huge asshole, then you probably don't want to defend yourself in court.

>>731933122
How old are you?

You got your ass handed to you by an 11 year old. Fucking kek. Theres nothing you can do. What he did was total self defense.

>>731939392
I'm not exaggerating it, I almost died. There are medical reports which can back this up.

>>731939438
I knocked one tooth out*. How do you know that I wasn't just hyped up on adrenaline? After all, when someone tries to kill you it gets intense.

>>731939713
he said 28 years young

>>731938848
>He was obviously trying to kill me or seriously injure me, fuck him.
FINISH HIM

>>731939778
theres no excuse adrenaline or not

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>>731938848
>I was out and fucking pissed myself

HAHAHAHAHA

>>731939398
/b/ doesnt have a archive
>no but i have screenshots of every comment you've made and there printed and dated with time too.
"i tried to steal from a 11 year old because i was fucked up at the time"
"im 28"
"how can i claim innocence"
the second its all read and compared against your case its obviously you.
your a straight up fucking bumhole

>>731933122
OP, You´re literally a fucking cunt and you don´t deserve to live. If a 11yo stupid ass kid broke your ass it´s because you are a good for nothing

Do you really want a lawyer? What a snowflake and hypocrite shit, kys before the kid kick your ass again in the court

>>731933122
Your fucked.

Age of 11 is the age of criminal responsibility so maybe he has committed a crime.

Kid committed ABH (maybe section 20 GBH). The defence is self defence or himself and his property.

The legal test is if the the self defence was in response to a real and immediate threat (it was) and that the level of force is deemed reasonable by a jury of your peers (it will be, beating on a grown ass adult robbing a kit is very reasonable no matter who you ask). Kid has self defence which negates any criminal charges against him.
You did say UK right?

Civil law wise, just no, don't even try it. Lesser burden of proof on you then criminal trial but any sane and sensible person would throw you in prison or at least beat your pre-teen rubbing self.

>>731939778
im sure you almost died...
im pretty sure the people working on you wanted to strangle you too.

>>731933122
kys faggot

>>731939819
No excuse for him to almost kill me? I agree.

>>731939885
Bodily functions are hilarious, aren't they? It's a completely normal reaction to being knocked out.

>>731939920
To all you tough guys out there, I would just love to see you try and escape the hold. You all would probably cry.

>>731939778
>After all, when someone tries to kill you it gets intense
The kid thought you were trying to kill him and kicked your sissy ass because of the adrenaline.

>>731940160
I wanted to take his stuff and go, I did not want violence. He was the one who tried to kill me.

>>731940061
Ah fuck this shitty legal system who rewards a psychopathic kid who uses self defense as an excuse to fucking try and kill people. Jesus christ.

>>731940124
Its funny when an 11 year old makes you piss yourself, because the 11 year old knocked you out.

I'd hate to see you get into a fight with a grown man or woman. you'll get shit on either way.

>>731940124
all the guys out here dont steal from children

>>731938914
Been afk for a good 20 mins and I'm still keking to this.

My housemate asked me what I was laughing at cryingwithlaughter.emoji

>>731933122
What type of low-level, degenerated, uneducated dumbass, would consider stealing from a kid. Nobody important cares about the problems that you brought onto yourself, especially if it was related to stealing from an adolescent for a quick buck. Good luck in Jail OP, you deserve it, no way you're getting out of this one, because it's all your fault

>>731940124
>You all would probably cry.
Did you?

>>731940124
>I would just love to see you try and escape the hold

i wouldn't have to, because im not a degenerate nigger who steals from 11 year olds.

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>>731933122
>try to steal a bike and iPad from a kid
>get beat up
>piss pants after getting beat up
>try to sue kid and family
>sueing for failing to steal and getting beat up
How fucking dumb can you be.

Can we all just picture for a moment this little boy in the picture squeezing a 28 year old adult until he is unconscious and in the process making him piss himself?

Comedy gold.

>>731940548
And him beating on the kid in an attempt to fight back but ultimately failing?

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>>731940124
>tough guys
>tries to steal a high pitched preteen choirboy's bike and ends up unconscious and pissing himself
aaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

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>>731940548
I see it.

>>731940061
Doesn´t matter if that´s the age of criminal responsibility or not. You tried to stole a child´s bike and he defend himself, in that kind of issues the victim even can kill you if his/her life it´s on danger.

Get over it, faggot. You´re a criminal scumbag and you don´t have excuse.

>>731940491
This whole thread has been one big laugh riot. This thread deserves to be screenshotted and be posted in those "epic threads" threads.

>>731933122
Post pic of yourself faggot. We want to see how strong you are

>>731940654
This!

Do you even lift /b/ro?

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>>731940335
>I wanted to take his stuff and go, I did not want violence
Don't even care if this is rp, funniest thread in a long while

>>731933122
nigger detected

>>731940654
OP probably looks like a tweaker, those are the only scum that excuse themselves from theft with lawsuits

good story OP lol somewhat believable

OP came to 4chan asking for legal advice, when he damn well knows he's fucked and instead probably just seeking comfort, instead he's not only managed to make a fool of himself in his community, but also on fucking 4chan for being this much of a fucking dumbass.
Congratulations, laughing stock.

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>>731940654
rare pic of OP here

>>731940548
And let me guess, you would have beat him up easily huh? Fuck these fake tough guys, probably never been in a fight before.

>>731940622
His life was not in danger.

>>731940654
>>731940749
I'm in-between homes at the moment, I can't afford to go to the gym. I'm not posting a picture of myself, there's a guy here who is screenshotting the conversations, I don't want to give proof.

>>731940749
Enough not to get knocked out by a 11 yo. But i really want to know how OP looks like. I have a mental Image but i want it confirmed.

>>731933122
you couldnt take on an 11 year old? yeah you deserve it

>>731933122
>e the facts of the case. We're currently negotiating a deal outside of the courts and that will likely be accepted soon. However, I wanted to know whether I have a chance of winning a counter-sue.
Not a chance in hell and your plea deal is sure to be shit since any lawyer would adore taking this open and shut turd of a case and putting you away with a whole bunch of great charges.

>>731933122
How does it feel knowing you just ended your life/future careers by stealing from a kid OP? Do you feel smart?

>>731940929
ANGRY HOBO TRIES TO TAKE 11 YEAR OLD BOY'S BICYCLE- WANTS TO SUE AFTER HAVING HIS ARSE BEATEN

>>731940335
If you don't tell /b/ who you are and where you live, your mom will die in her sleep tonight.

A.. wait.

>>731940909
And Op looks confirmed. 1000 years in gulag for him

>>731933122
MFW

>>731940984
I'm skinny-fat, white and use dove soap is that enough for you?

>>731941034
What life? What future career? You don't know me.

>>731941048
>Muffled "you wot m8?" in the distance.

>>731941130
>What life? What future career?
Exactly

>>731940499
true story
>friend of mine visiting family at christmas time
>his three brothers are there
>he leaves with his wife and are driving down the street when someone whips a beer can at his winsdhield
>he gets out and gets jumped. one guy has a bat
>his wife drives pack and tells his brothers he's getting jumped
>brothers run down the street
>guys get into a car
>one brother reaches into the car to grab keys so they don't get away
>car rolls back and hits another car
>guy whose car it is and who jumped the first guy takes all brothers to court for damages
>he wins

fucking strange things happen

OP is a stupid fucking faggot, in some countries, you lose your hand for stealing? plus how the fuck is an 11 year old gonna kick your ass lmfaoooo fuck legal recourse you should just gash your wrists as hard and deep as you can

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>SCREENCAP THIS ENTIRE FUCKING THREAD
SCREENCAP THIS ENTIRE FUCKING THREAD

>>731937846
>Yeah, I understand but nobody is seeing it from my shoes so why should I see it from theirs?

This is weapons grade autism

>>731940929
So, OP you are homeless, a drug addict, a fat fuck, a pedophile and a thief. You are literally the butthole of the universe. Did your daddy touched you when you were little. How did you end up like this you big piece of dog shit.

>>731933122
Jesus christ! I can't believe someone commited a crime and is looking for positive reinforcement.
You sir, are a dolt and a cad.
Everyone in this thread is now dumber for having read it.

OP, I love how you're painting this kid as the next Mike Tyson and are confident that the kid could kick everyone's asses here.

And then I look at the picture and see a kid who has trouble lifting his fork to his mouth.

>>731941130
Your future career will be getting your ass cracked well open by the other inmates once they notice what you are. Can happen in a week or in a year, but that's sure. Fag.

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>be me
>28
>see a kid playing on his ipad near hjs bike
>daaamn, that is a nice bike
>Kid i'm taking that bi..
>WHAT ARE YOU DOING
>LET ME GO OH GOD LET ME GO AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>some guy walks past, while i cry for help
>i start to feel a weird sensation in my pants
>i cry and hear the crunch of my bones, while a liquid substance is dripping from my pants
>i punch the kid in the face
>he falls off me
>i run to my house
>all in tears
>and piss
>ribs cracked
>at least now i can watch some mlp episodes

>>731941130
How can you be skinny-fat? Please explain.

>>731933122
How does it feel, knowing you're a petty criminal, you know, because you like to steal from kids.

>>731940929
>being buttraped by a literal 11 year old
>fight
pick one

>>731941310
I'm in between homes, not a drug addict, skinny, not a pedo and a thief. I had a loving family.

>>731941354
You got a picture of his face. The kid has a 6 pack, I saw it in the park. The fact that he was shirtless was probably the reason why he's going with the sexual assault angle.

>>731933122
Sorry bud. I'm just about ready to graduate with my JD and I'm 99 percent sure you have no standing.

goys, can we do some ebin autist research and find who this guy is? I honestly dont believe this is real

>>731933122
This is the funniest thing I've read today.

>>731941563
No, you had not.
Or ever will.

>>731941613
>goys, can we do some ebin autist research and find who this guy is? I honestly dont believe this is real
I agree with anon. We need more info.

>>731941678
In the U.S. crime reports are public record. Is this the same case in the U.K.?

>>731941600
Realised that an hour ago tbh.

>>731941673
Stop assuming shit about me, you literally know nothing about me except for this.

>>731933122
>Tl;dr
>OP diddles 11 yr old
>Attempts to steal bike/iPad
>Fails
>Gets butthurt and tries to sue kid
Lolwut
OP you're better off in jail tbh

>>731933122
you will pay for his dental fees and convicted for 12-18 months.

if u aint got the money u ll be facing jail time, ho.

with a good lawyer u might get 18 months at home.

>>731941759

This tells us a lot, autismo.

>>731941563
This kid is going to get so laid telling the story how he subdued an almost 30 year old man who was trying to rob him. Bitches his age get so wet at stories like that.

>>731941733
I think they actually. Do. Look for news about this shit. I tried to search for the kid. No match, i think this is a hoax.

>>731933122
how old are you?

>>731941563
So you stared at the kid's body for long enough to know he had a 6 pack, you basically just admitted you were a pedo. Normal people don't notice shit like that.

>>731941857
Trial hasn't started yet dumbass.

>>731941882
28.

>>731941901
Ugh, it was noticeable at first glance. Not a pedo.

Hello OP

>>731941991
Arrest records are public record too dumbass. I bet your ugly mug is on the front page of those magazines you see in gas stations making fun of criminals.

>>731941991
>child buttery
>attempt to steal and cause physical damage

i dont know man. If it was an adult, u might had a case.

I think you are fucked.

18-24 months minimum

>>731941759
Fuck you.
You posted a kid's picture online asking, well, this.
Capped @ thebarchive dot com .... 731933122/
You live in uk, right? Let's tip the police. Have a nice evening, tough guy with a loving family that's alive and well and that won't pass the rest of his miserable life having his ass pounded in jail.

>>731936084
Hahahaha
>i would like to see you try.
You got KO'd by a lil kid u can't act tough nos boi.

>>731941991
So you saw a little kid with a full 6 pack and didn't think maybe it was a bad idea to fuck with him?

>>731941991
Ahm. It's a hoax 100%, you should be in preventive arrest if you did what you said. Pedophilia acts are considered menace for society. So Op is a lieing piece of shit.

>>731941821
Dental fees free in England for young un's.

>>731942156
I think so too, legal system is broken.

Britfag here.

I'll keep my eyes open!

If I see anything in the papers, tv or facebook, I'll report back here!

Story (if true) will surely get reported on. It's to kekfull to not be!

>>731942138
>spotted the 'victim'

(you could have used his real name to creep him out)

ill do it for you.

so dylan.. how did this happen, Mr Dylan,sir?

>>731933122
have you tried zyklon b?

i hope that kid gets a medal. i would personally present him a check for $1000 just because he whupped your faggot ass

>>731942322
>legal system is broken.
dont steal from people faggot

>>731942250
the kid's photo cant be found anywhere. fuck off

>>731942322
>legal system is broken.
I dunno man from where I'm standing it seems to be working just fine in your case.

>>731942381
Check your priviledge,friend.

>>731942401

noone would post a pic of an 11 year old your fooking autist

>>731942370
lets make a goFundme page

>>731942481
11 year olds have facebook

>>731942546
So you've been stalking this kid on facebook and expect us to believe you're not a pedo?

Bitch you got what you deserved, I hope nothing but of you to lose this case. Also "Psychiatric damage" pansy got his ass whooped by an 11 year old.

>>731942620
Srsly guys. I know 4chan justice team is sleeping. But we really need to find this faggot.

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>>731933122
Human fucking trash. PTSD from a crime you committed. Faggot.

>>731942267
Yeah my bad, he's a strong ass kid. Shouldn't have messed with him.

>>731935468
>this screams i tried to touch his penor and he beat me up.
kek this
t. pedofag esq.

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>>731933122
If you would have tried to rape that cute kid I would support you, but this is just ridiculous.

>>731933122
Give it a shot. Judge here, I'd buy the story.

>>731942782
Maybe you're just a weak-ass adult.

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lmao this whole thread

>>731933122
>TIL the same OP that's so fucking unscrupulous as to steal presents from a child is too retarded to consider punching him in the nads in a situation where you're weak enough to be crushed to death by that same fucking child
Jesus what a trainwreck.

>>731942836
A judge who uses 4chan? What has the world come to?

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>>731933122

Well, firstly, you're an idiot.

Secondly, this is probably fake, but I'm bored and should probably put my three years studying law to some use whilst no-one's willing to employ me in the field.

So, considering the size difference (Assuming you're a grown adult), one has to take into account reasonable force. If it was you versus another adult, and he'd put you to sleep and then kept squeezing, it'd be past that.

But seeing as he was kid, probably fearing for his fucking life, it was quite reasonable for him to keep going and make sure you were out and not faking it so he'd let go and you could renew your attack.

And the psychiatric plea is pointless, as you're the only one to blame for it.

TL;DR, you're a fucking idiot, somebody include me in the screencap.

OP is the biggest faggot Ive seen in a while

>stealing from a child

Just neck yourself already

I want to get my ass beat by a shota too :(

Can someone post the screencaps. To lazy to do it myself. But i need them for safe keeping.

>>731942708
i never sleep.

>>731942782
you should just contact the child and offer him some money to drop the charges.

That's it faggit.this andmove on.

just dont say anyting like that online. only in person.

anything u say will be used against u faggit.

>>731943121
Let me fix that for you

>unsuccessful stealing from a child and getting beat so bad he pisses himself

>>731943206
Some shotas are just deserving a handjob. Not gay, btw.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHCU-wo51sU

>>731933122
rofl little nigga you deserve it go and die.

>>731943110
there wont be no screencap in this pasta u fucking MAJOR FAGGIIIT.

MY EYES HURT WITH THE CANCER OF YOUR WORDS

STOP HURTING MY EYES YOU FUCKING NEWFRIEND.

GOD DAMN. NEWFAGS STINK.I COULD SMELL YOUR NEWFAGGING AROMA FROM THE VERY START

FUCK THOSE NEWFERRIES

>>731943007
Probably a bit of both.

>>731943041
Didn't think of it.

>>731943411
That's what we've been discussing.

>>731943206
You want to have you ribs broken and to nearly die? God damn.

>>731943612
Broken ribs ain't shit. I broke three ribs after being kicked in the chest by a horse.

>>731933122
Offer to suck his dick if he'll drop the charges.

>>731943740
No means no anon kek

>>731943740
He cracked my ribs pretty early. I was stuck in that squeeze with my broken ribs for a long time, you know how painful that shit is? Borderline torture.

put me in the screancap

>>731941759

We can only assume what kind of retarded that tries to steal from an 11 year and gets beat up is like unless you tell us.

But nobody cares

op is a nignog 100%

>>731943900
Kek. But in all seriousness I learned the hard way not to stand behind a horse.

What did the boy smell like down there?

>>731943904
Yea man forget waterboarding the CIA should hire this kid to squeeze people with his legs. Fucking brutal dude.

>>731933122
Your fucked. If he felt threatened he could have killed you. You got off lucky. Just take your injuries, settle and leave well enough alone. Stop trying to be an American.

>>731943904
I can't believe you're still here after all this abuse OP

>>731942401
pussy

>>731944151
Don't worry. Op is used with abused. He got a lot from his daddy.

>>731944096
>>731944151
You all would do the same thing as me. Putting pressure on a broken rib is bad enough but squeezing it further is just ridiculous amounts of pain.

>>731944235
Never knew my dad.

>>731944096
Your rib would break just the same as mine. And then we would see how much of a pussy you are.

>>731944387
So mommy did you with the strap-on. Or big brother? So you really meant loving family. They loved you hard

>>731944571
I need to know. Did you cry?

>>731944387
I would not have tried to steal a bike and iPad in the first place. My parents instilled values and morals in this child, unlike you.

>>731944637
It's a natural thing when constricted to cry, it's basic biology. Not full on crying, just watery eyes and single tear type shit. So yeah, I cried you would too.

>>731944726
Ugh, anyone who puts down another person and brags about his own morals is not moral.

>>731944952
>Ugh, anyone who puts down another person and brags about his own morals is not moral.
You tried to rob a child, a fucking child. Then you knocked out his tooth when he defended himself. You are in no position to be talking about morality.

>>731944092
Clean like soap.

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>After all, when someone tries to kill you it gets intense

>>731944952
Says the faggot who steals from kids kek.

Great morals OP

I don't even know where to begin with the screencap there are so many hilarious comments, both from OP and the rest of us.

>>731944952
>implying moral high ground above someone who "put you down"
>literally tried to steal a child's presents
Yeah, nah. I'm gonna have to award it to the other anon, to be honest.

That's like saying
>harshly judging me for murder makes you immoral
No. It doesn't. You fucking committed a crime.

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Dude what!?
Should have knocked his fucking teeth in.

>>731945143
That is not the OP, if you want the truth I could only smell grass and sweat. My nose is kind of blocked, dumbass.

>>731945132
I defended myself by knocking out his tooth.

>>731944952
>>731945132
This/

I was not bragging, I made a statement and a testament to my parents. They took the time to teach me what was right and I kept that knowledge. That is all I said.

>>731945305
He did, to no effect.

How did this kid have strong enough thighs to break an adult's ribs and knock him unconscious?

Look at the kid in the picture, I can't even imagine him doing that. You are the weakest piece of shit I've ever heard OP, no exaggeration.

>>731945390
>tfw OP rolled a 2
You succeeded, in your goal. You punched him. But that's all you succeeded in, really.

>>731945523
Kids probably a beast at squats.

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>>731938914

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>>731933122
Delicious pasta.

OP posting this shit on 4chan and expecting not to get slammed. Priceless moment.

>>731945661
This wasn't pasta before but it probably will be now.

>>731945602
His legs were huge for his age, bigger than mine.

>>731945679
Only used this site once or twice for the tv section, I knew it was a pretty dumb site but I didn't know it was this bad.

>>731945810
You came to the wrong neighborhood mother fucker.

>>731945810
>His legs were huge for his age, bigger than mine.
You didn't think this was a red flag before you tried to rob him?

Please for the love of God someone archive this thread. This is the better than all the YLYL threads for the 3 years combined.

I hope you get sent to prison and get another beating. No ass fucking though as you'd probably like that.

>>731945810
>complains about site being dumb
>literally failed to steal from a child
Shut up, Florida Man.

>>731933122
How about you accept the fact that you're a dumb piece of nigger shit and take it like the man you wish you were?

>>731945941
I'm going to screencap the whole thread then make another thread so people can decide what merits staying in the screencap. There are so many golden comments I don't know if it can fit in one file. Keep this thread alive for 15 minutes while I go get wings and beer.

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>If he was worried about repurcussions he would have let go as soon as I was out and fucking pissed myself. He was obviously trying to kill me or seriously injure me, fuck him.

>>731945874
What do you mean? The kid is a white, middle to upper class guy. Probably has a great neighbourhood.

>>731945940
I didn't notice his legs, only noticed when he was squeezing the life out of me. He had a 6 pack, should have turned and left after seeing that.

>>731946025
From England.

>>731933122
>>>/adv/

>>731933122
i'm not willing to help a nigger. fuck off

>>731946090
>From England.
Woooooosh.

>>731934760
what the fuck, anon... is ... is that a tattoo? did some anon unironically get that tattooed on their body?

>>731946068
He had a right to kill you. You where stealing from him. That means he can take action against you same as entering his property. You are lucky the ladt got him to stop.

>>731946229
For the last time, I am white.

>>731946266
Meaning? You should have been able to tell we're from England from the kid's crooked ass teeth.

>>731933122
Hope your using a proxy or you just made a confession retard.

>>731946090
You're scum that deserves to be shot in the street like the degenerate you are. You're filth that fills up courts with petty lawsuits. You're too much of a bitch to take an L from an 11 year old, and want to get revenge, because you clearly can't do it without SUING AN 11 YEAR OLD.

End your life and save the courts money.

>>731946090
Coming to the wrong neighborhood means going some place and expecting something and getting something else. Such as your experience here.

>>731946319
No, he did it ironically :)

>>731945810
OK I'm calling BS now. If his legs were bigger than yours, and he has a six pack, he would have been way bigger than 60lbs. Your story doesn't add up.

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>>731946423
As a matter of fact, I just so happen to have a diagram explaining exactly what "Wooosh" means.
Enjoy.

Dear OP,

Before this thread 404's, I sincerely want to thank your dumb, weak faggot arse for a night of top kek!

Kind Regards

Anon

Are we just going to ignore the fact that this little kid in the picture made the OP:

A) Cry
B) Piss himself
C) Get knocked the fuck out
D) Beg for him to let go

>>731946423
>stole bike and ipad
>white
how stupid do you think we are?

Dude the fact you tried to steal from a child negates any legal chance in hell you may have had. No one will take your side simply for that fact alone. This includes lawyers.

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>>731933122
time to end your life, faggot

also, only one foot taller and significantly weaker than 11 year old, manlet detected

>>731946710
>be in burgerland
>niggers break into house and steal things
>sustain injury inside the house
>sue homeowner
>win

>>731946639
Well my legs are nothing too impressive and skinny people often have 6 packs.

>>731946658
Well thank you.

>>731946733
I'm not significantally weaker than him, the difference is probably only slight.

>>731935700
Top kek

>>731946799
This was out in public on public property..

>>731946733
Also, I'm 6 foot. He was probably around 4'7.

>>731946855
If you aren't dwarfing an 11 year old's strength, then you are physically degenerate.

>>731946933
>public property
sue the government for the unsafe environment, tard

>>731946985
Picture doesn't look like it, but he is actually strong as fuck.

>>731935700
He's 11, he hasn't played oblivion.