Be Me >White, 26 >Double STEM major from top tier US school

>>731774263
Bullshit you have been looking for a job. unless what you think a decent paying is crazy. with a double major,lots of money, and no relationship you can work and move anywhere in the world. fucking do that. fuck a serious relationship its not worth your time. if you have ever had a relationship thats good enough. just go get a job that can pay for a hobby that you either have or will create.

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>>731774263
stop sucking

>>731775523
My last job paid 55k, My mimimum is 60k.
In my richass city that's considered low enough to qualify for "low income" housing. Am I really shooting too high?

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>>731775695
kill yourself

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>>731775523
Pretty much this. If you have no ties, just get up and move. It's not that hard.

>>731775695
yes. I had a job paying 45k and quit to move back home. closest job i could get was 32k a year but fucking amazing benifits. and you can move anywhere. move out of that place and go somewhere cheaper. in wisconsin the 32k doesnt even qualify for low income. Im buying a condo right now on that salary. if you have some money saved litteraly find the job you want online in a cheaper place and move there,

>>731776021
im super high and having morgan freeman say this is the highlight of my year so far.

>>731776060
Okay humble brag, but I have a good chunk of change. Intheritance plus savings (while working) invested very well have given me way more money than the average person my age. It makes it very hard for me to just cave to a low paying job.

But the final thing that recently pushed me over the edge was I applied to an unpaid intership, interviewed, and they got back and said "we don't have the resources to train you and need someone with professional level experience"
Feels kafkaesque

>>731776288
dude you if you truly have 2 STEM field degrees and you cant find a job in the entire world that will pay you over 50k a year you are looking wrong. tell me a job you want or in a ballpark of what kind of career you want and i will find you a job

>>731775695
>tfw I made 15k a year to qualify for low income housing and that's the average low here in eastern washington

45k a year is like, you wouldn't even need to be on foodstamps. You could buy a car. What the ever loving fuck are you bitching about?

>>731776566
Degree:
Bachelors: Biochem, Economics from UC Berkeley GPA 3.2
Associates: Math, Comp Sci, Engineering from Santa Barbara City College GPA 3.9

Job: Finance, Financial Engineering, Investment banking, sales engineering, Consulting (ideally where biochem can be useful, but not necessary)

>>731776958
>>731776566
Considering going for a masters in finance or financial engineering

>>731776958
whats wrong with any of these
https://www.indeed.com/cmp/Channel-Partners-Capital,-LLC/jobs/Credit-Analyst-Underwriter-6849f5fcc65d5010?sjdu=QwrRXKrqZ3CNX5W-O9jEvf0xTPd-nI-8ns6kY_fzEbh0AoWY6aWFV-mADeKNJbWFjfXNTAGEnA0-Eah46_mLDtBfD0dVpc2chYXD4B9Lk1c

>>731776958
>>731777389
https://sjobs.brassring.com/TGWEbHost/jobdetails.aspx?jobId=982321&partnerid=25611&siteid=5324&codes=D_Indeed

>>731776958
theres thousands of jobs mate. just dont be picky and move. or if you like school and do want to possibly earn more money go for your masters like that other guy said

Lower your standards, do what makes you happy not rich, never blame others for your own failures.

>>731777389
>https://www.indeed.com/cmp/Channel-Partners-Capital,-LLC/jobs/Credit-Analyst-Underwriter-6849f5fcc65d5010?sjdu=QwrRXKrqZ3CNX5W-O9jEvf0xTPd-nI-8ns6kY_fzEbh0AoWY6aWFV-mADeKNJbWFjfXNTAGEnA0-Eah46_mLDtBfD0dVpc2chYXD4B9Lk1c
>>731777429
Bud, dont think I don't apply to shit like that all the fuckign time. I just never hear back... usually at all. Feels like throwing my resume into the wind. If it helps I could post my resume (redacting personal details) so you could see if I'm fuckin up

>>731774263
I'm literally chilling in a parking lot getting paid to look at things in my car. If I'm dumb as shit, you can figure it out

>>731777671
man thats fine if your cool posting it. it really could be that. i had been sending mine out with some mistyped shit and didnt get call backs from low end companies in my field and i was in the same boat as you. i couldnt understand why and it was my resume

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>>731777982
Page 1

>>731774263
>White, 26
>Double STEM major from top tier US school

Being white in a top tier school is the equivalent of undeserving-spoiled-rich kid status. You havent earned shit.

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>>731777982
Page 2 (couldn't find a way to cleanly make it one page so I print double sided)

>>731778032
Op should try claiming to be black, and transgender.

Hell, my friends immigrant wife is gettinf job offers out the ass cause shes an asian woman in stem. She doesnt even have her full degree in the usa either.

>>731778068
ok i really dont know why they wouldnt call you unless your number or email is wrong but its not your eduction. so there is something out there online about you that they access and it gets you on a no call list

>>731778025
Go get a job as a programmer and make that sweet 6 figure salary.

>>731778330
Know how to look it up? I google my name all the fucking time, see nothing.

>>731777734
What's your job anon? Sounds chill af

>>731774263
what are you a fucking art major?
i went to fucking community college!
now work at iNTEL for mid six-figures
AND iNTEL pays rent bennies so basically they pay my condo rent also.

>>731778437
What are you doing at Intel currently? How'd you get there?

>>731778330
Imma be honest, I usally am pretty non-superstitious an logical, but in my more derpressive phases I honestly wonder if not only there is a god, but he hates me. I'm fit and decently good looking but can count the number of times I've had sex on my hands (being 26). I have money but the vest majority of women wont give me a second date. I have very high academic creds, but cannot find a job.

Not even gonna say where the darker parts of my mind have gone...

>>731777541
Yeah, don't be afraid to relocate, especially if you're young and not tied down with a family.
A good starting salary is nice, but look at cost of living as well.

>>731778611
First and fucking foremost, you probably "humble brag" too much.
Learn to listen and nod when you are on a date or interview. You dont need to chime in everytime. Ive gone on dates and said 3 fucking words all night and have gotten laid.

>>731778611
Second, shut the fuck up. And i dont mean be fucking quiet. Learn what to say along with when to say it.

When a girl says "so what do you do?" Tell her a little, act humble, and unimportant. Let her mind run.

Same principle when you are in the room, be small, unassuming. Let your goddamn credentials speak for you

>>731778611
bro you are trying way to hard at life. chill the fuck out. fuck a job for a year you have the money a credentials to not give a fuck. life is not about sex and women thats just a bonus. litterally take a year off and travel find a place to move and once you find it find a job i promise with that resume you there is a job for you. or maybe in all honesty maybe you have a shitty personality. thats why jobs dont want you and i guess either do women. sorry to be harsh but i just dont personally know you

>>731778611
Third, suck my fucking dick. And i dont mean literally, fag. When you are with a future boss, or future cock sock, kiss that ass and suck that dick like it will give 10 years of life to your dying son.

>>731778816
Either this (which would look insincere) or the other extreme where he thinks he's mister big fish.

>>731779104
/thread

This guy knows

>cannot find a decent paying job

>lots of money

make sure your lies line up when you try to impress some anonymous neckbeards on the internet you turd

>>731778816
But are you a Chad?

My general rules are never talk about money, period. (recently) no longer pay full on first date (paying wasnt working for me, and hurting my wallet). Only say where I went to school and what I studied if asked.

So dunno what else I could be fucking up hard. TBH why I'm kinda depressed and posting a thread like this is a couple days ago I was talking to this qt on tinder and she seemed into me. Wanted to face time, never done it before so had to figure it out. We did, and it was clear immediately something turned her off and she called off the conversation quick.

Though I'm no model, I've always been told I'm a solid 7, so don't know what it could be.

>>731779259
Inheritance and investments are a thing, cunt

>>731779333
Post a picture of your face for us. I aint trying any shit, i legitimately want to see if theres a problem.

Side note, i ain't a chad, but i do have chad tendency

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>>731778611
Get tested for weaponized autism.

>>731779333
Who gives a shit what number you are, clearly there's something else going on. I've seen 4s with 9s because they have a really fucking good personality and are fun to be around.

Be someone people want to be around, be interesting, never talk about your depression or the fact you're on a dry spell. Women can smell that shit 20 miles away.

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>>731779527
Seen psychs. No I'm not on the spectrum, though I do have major depressive disorder and a minor case of add.
>>731779498
One of my better pics, I'll post and "average" one in a sec. I've had my dumb friends dox me on here before so if you recognize me please dont because I'm not really in a humerous mood right now.

>>731779333
listen to
>>731779662
about dont talk about your depression or the dry spell. and ya it just might be your face man idk.

>>731779806
Well, hell, i have no idea what the problem is.

Perhaps you need a change of scenery. Not even a new state, just travel to a new city, spend the day, go to a park and talk to people.

Maybe get a new haircut

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>>731779905
Crappier pic, worse haircut

>>731779806
must be voice or something else. Man like i said before im high as shit. If i had even a tenth of your knowledge and looked liked you i would have no problem. so im saying bullshit to it all

>>731779969
Fam, i aint a genius, but im stumped.

I wish you the best of luck, cause you certainly arent bad looking

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>>731779333
Fuck women dude you don't need them. They're just all whores that fuck chads that treat them like cum rags. Traps are the way to go. They're not actual women They understand and they look cute.

>>731774263
Jobs are up right now but if you are really struggling go move to another state. Do you live in some shithole state?

>>731774263
Your life seems fine what's the problem

>>731779969
Looks like you voted for Trump. That may be a reason chicks are fleeing. With the whole sjw/feminist bs nowadays that may be a factor.

>>731780034
Wish OP were a fag... sadly naw.

My history is basically to assume most girls will ghost me before we even meet, and all will after first date.
I've only had sex with one girl more than once (and it was twice)

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>>731779806
Make best-selling rap cd, steal money from black people, profit.

>>731780194
I don't reveal my power level in public

>>731779969
Are you by chance a douchebag?

>>731780219
kek, I've gotten that before

>>731779969
Do you really wear clothing with flags on it?

>>731780307
Only when it's funny (shooting guns in texas (pic), 4th of july, etc). Not normally

>>731780307
All the time.

>>731780262
There it is, that's the secret money shot. I can only imagine how mormon you are as well.

>>731780307
You got a problem with flag shirts?

>>731780494
More like fag shirts

>>731780200
Man im tellin you stop worrying about women. women will come later. get a job but first go spend some time traveling you are all study. all i see when i see your resume is someone that has spent their life in books studying. your going to be a boring person to talk to bc all it looks like you do is study. Thus why people dont want to hire you or date you. thus take off travel and enjoy culture and learn by seeing not reading. then come back in a few months and you will have a new outlook and hopefully find that job

>>731780465
wut?

>>731780552
You son of a bitch

>>731780581
spent half a year in germany just being cultural, maybe it helped me but not enough

The fuck do you live where 60k is hardly livable? I live in one of the most expensive cities in North America and live pretty comfortably making 60k.

>>731780721
>>731780721
maybe, im trying man but if everything your saying is truthful than you just have a bad vibe about you. i have a fucking arts degree doing a easy job making enough to get by and im genuinly happy in life. you try and impress people by actually trying to be the best at everything but its not impressing women the way it should because the world is changing. but your still depressed so change what you are doing

>>731781059
Santa Barbara. Lowest price I've seen for a studio apt is 1500/mo. Not really trying to stay here, but dont plan to move without a job offer bringing me.

>>731778025
>>731778068

As someone who doesn't know anything about the job market, this resume looks confused.

You talk about computer programming alot, then you talk about your work in hospitals, then you talk about selling mattresses, then you say you are conversational in German, then you say you know Circuit Design, then you say you know all these matrices and transformations in mathematics, then you say you had a 4.86 GPA in High school? Seriously wtf

>>731781252
My studio apartment where I'm at is 1500/mo.

I'm really not sure what you're complaining about, sounds like your standards are too high.

Pretty much everyones advice here is on point.

Stop complaining about your life. Stop humblebragging. Get a job (literally any job, seriously, if money is not a factor you clearly just need some routine in your life to get yourself sorted. My stint on unemployment certainly didn't help my mental state.)

>>731781185
Nothing is false, in fact even left some achievements and stuff out, but ya might me right.

I mean we could could get into how my late dad (may he burn in hell) always told me I wasnt good enough no matter how well I did, so that drove me to always want to be the bests at everything I do (and academically that was usually the case) but I'm not sure what to change.

Basically now I'm a NEET. My day is 3 hrs applying to jobs, 1hr jerking off, 45 minutes working out, rest: eating, sleeping, jerking off, fucking around on the computer (internet of vidya).

>>731781296
thats what im saying right everything is to perfect and like tooo good. plus his looks. fuck being high can never know your being catfished

>>731778025
>>731778068
>>731781296

Oh and to add on, your resume actually seems a little fake

>>731781505
I said lowest, avg might be 2.3k. Also pretty much anything else is much more expensive too.

>>731781575
If you wanna hop in a discord I can verify everything brah

>>731781603
How so. OP may be a neet, but he's not a faggot. I've lied about nothing.

>>731781252
>>731781505
dude here in milwaukee 1500/month gets you a 2bed/2bath apartment in the nicer parts of downtown where there is a shit tone of finace jobs. fuck my college roomate got one with a psychology degree for 45k amonth

>>731778025
>>731778068

Oh and despite all your scholarships, accomplishments and whatever else, you have a lot of grammatical errors in your resume

BTW 2 page resumes are tacky and those graphs on page 2 look kind of stupid

Are we being trolled right now?

This guy knows 7+ computer languages, has a double major, and completed an electrical engineering, physics and math and Computer Science programs in 1 year?

>>731774263
lol 5'8 good luck with that.

>>731781883
it has to be a troll. like im glad if it is bc if not something is seriously fucking wrong with this guy

>>731781749

Calling BS on the rent thing.

https://www.rentjungle.com/average-rent-in-santa-barbara-rent-trends/

>>731781883
>Grammatical Errors
Can you point them out, I actually want to fix

>Knows 7+ languages
I took 25 units one semester and 30 the next. Plus summer classes

Idk what to say brah, should I post my transcripts (again name redacted)

With knowledge of Biostats, Machine Learning and strong in math (esp. statistics) a 120k-200k awaits you in any major tech area. Just clean up the resume. You've stuck "R" under practical skills, but any data science just wants to see it. Get rid of Excel, Word, and any other padding. You're just trying to make your resume look bigger. Why in General Concepts does it end with Machine Learning? And shit like Inheritance and Polymorphism is fluff. Overloading looks retarded. Regex? Great! You better know these if you put them on the resume. The whole "Concepts Known" part needs work. Get rid of the bar graphs, and put what you know best, first. Hell, just claim "Expert" in Java, C/C++, Python, R. And add the rest to a "I know these too" column. It's a lazy resume, so I assume you're lazy. And by the rest of the thread, I'm pretty sure I'm right.

>>731782055
I guess if you want to

What do you mean "units"?
25 classes? Hours?

How did you learn it all so fast?
>Implying you aren't trolling

>>731781991
I mean if you count the neighborhoods where spics and dindus stab each other wholesale that may be true, but im speaking places actualyl liveable

>>731782067
whoa, actual good advice out of left field.

>>731782055
Oh and go find the grammar mistakes yourself, fuckboi

>>731776288
> have a good chunk of change. Intheritance plus savings (while working) invested very well have given me way more money than the average person my age. It makes it very hard for me to just cave to a low paying job.
Fucking millenials. You fuckers are always shooting yourselves in the foot. While you sit on your high horse about your fancy degree and wage standards, a hardworking guy named Rajan from India is happily taking your job, getting promotions and advancements, and not complaining about shit.

And I thank god I work with Rajan and not you. Fuck you. Welcome to real life.

>>731782126
At least in cali colleges, 12 units is considered full time, so I took more than twice that

How I learned so fast? Idk man, I just could handle it. Obviously didnt have much a life when I was doing that (basically woke up, went to school, came home, drank to sleep, repeat)

>>731782067
>so I assume you're lazy. And by the rest of the thread, I'm pretty sure I'm right.

yaaaas.

>>731782067
you sound like you're actually not a faggot, could I discord you for a few mins to get tips?

>>731782305
Can I email you?

>>731779259
i play league of legends almost 24/7 and am retired at 28 earning $2900 a month. do i impress anyones?

>>731782753
Plz tell us how

>>731782659
If you wanna, know a good way I could set up forwarding to my email (it's my name and dont wanna fully dox myself)

>>731782840
Here's my email
I don't give a shit
It's just a throwaway
Wjones41 hotmail

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>>731782126
Page 1. Only one of the schools, but figure if I verify some, whatever. It's harder to get my CAL transcripts

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>>731782126
Page 2

>>731782901
sent

>>731782241
I do hiring for a fairly large company and yes FUCK YOU WHINY ASS MILLENNIALS. We don't hire you intentionally because you don't do anything but piss and moan about "DESERVING MORE" when you haven't proven shit.
I will hire some 40+ year old or a foreigner 80% of the time more than you, even if you are more "Qualified" on your most likely trumped up resume.

Had so many of you fucks flame out because they couldn't handle actual work.

>>731782805
medically reitred from the army for bipolar disorder and then had a bunch of manic episodes leading me to extended hospital stays. they increased my disability to 100% which is basically an early retirement.

>>731783132
>>731782241
What work do yall do?
Any advice other than be more patient and prove yourself? Or is that the only problem?

>>731783349
dude there's nothing wrong with making $35k a year in a crappy job. you don't really start makng money until you have mre experience under your belt.

>>731783589
I'm not OP btw

I understand there's nothing wrong with it at all

>>731783132
So what's the point, you wont hire us, then what? Us, the eventual proletariat, rise up and rape your daughters while we put your heads on stakes?

>>731783349

You know the worst thing is not YOU, its all the others who ruin the shit for you.

its like chris rock said in the who's more racist skit. "you gonna get a job, niggas gonna get fucked up and they are not gonna hire another nigga for 10 years"

A lot of places are getting way way more selective because of past experiences and for the bigger workforce that is out there.

best advice i can give you is 3 things.
1. Do NOT send blanket resumes, aka the same one to 50 jobs. make 4 or 5 versions of your resume ( and yes like the other anon said lose the bar charts, that looks stupid for a CS resume....i wouldn't even really add that for a project manager ). Have those few versions of your resume and have those reordered and targeted for a certain type of job.

2. If you are going for technical job like machine learning, bio etc... Offer to show/prove what you know instead of waiting for them to ask because a lot of the times hiring managers know absolutely dick about the job they are hiring for. They are just a damn gatekeeper for the actual department that needs the position. I know a friend who does machine learning and neural nets that gets offers at least once a week from major companies. He didn't get shit for jobs until he started sending in examples of what he can/has done because he made tons of code and posted it on git-hub. People can look at that and THAT is provable.

3. Fit in with the other people, this is probably the hardest one but "personality fit" is often more important to everyone than what you know. Because i don't care if you are einstein/hawking/tesla rolled into one, if you are an smug nutsack that boasts all the time noone is gonna want you on their team.

>>731784127
Well i will be dead with my head on a pike at that point so the fuck do i care?

>>731784127
I don't think anyone is worried that a brat with nothing to show for his life but a college degree and who won't take a job until someone pays him what he thinks he's "worth" is going to rise up and hurt anybody. At most, you'll just make whiny-sounding threats on the internet.

>>731784287
Thanks for the advice
Those all sound really straight forward and doable

So, what would it take for a millenial to prove to you that they aren't like the other entitled whining millenials?

>>731784398
I mean if you say so, remember. "God mad man, Samuel Colt made them equal."

Beeing a whiney neet may last short term, but strip a man of hope and will to live and he becomes an incredibly dangerous weapon.

No I'm not saying this is what I'm gonna do, but I see how that could be a realistic outcome of a generation that is refused subsistence

I am on a similar boat here, Graduated with 2 degrees. Immigrated to US with student visa and got my OPT. Went to the closest large town to find work in my field online applications returned 0, job fairs got me few interviews but no job. Started working as a bouncer at a local bar, too scared of getting deported on assault charges so i tried to be civil and it worked then i got fired for being too nice. Got hired as security for my landlord and then sweet talked my way to be their tech guy then their tech and marketing guy. Moved to another state to try my luck and nothing, started my own web site business, something i did during college for 4 years. Was pretty good won some awards made some cash in my homecountry.

Wanna know the secret to dealing with animal people? Look tough and act tougher. People who would mug you instead compliment your beard and shit.

OP, just take the lowest thing in your field, hate yourself and then work to impress your bosses to get promoted. Then do what you want. Shit the only reason i still go on is to watch the douchebags like >>731783132 ,>>731782241
when the small company that took you buys theirs down the line with the profits you made and have a good laugh.

>>731784998
Based, I find that the "get promoted" thing is a meme. My last job promoted me multiple times, my title increased YAY. No pay increaseas though, the company couldnt afford that... So basically they were giving me a dry rub to keep me around.

But as I'm getting more drunk and more depressed
If isnt the case that "god hates me" what's my fucking problem
>Can't get laid
>Good looking, wealthy

>Cant get a job that pays market, let alone well
>Good credentials

Life feels Kafkaesque

>>731785206
Can happen, it means they are con artists. Over the years while me and my friend were working as a 2 man team for websites. It is better to reject a deal from a con artist and starve than accept it and get conned afterwards.

Maybe negotiate your salary based on the value you provide? Thats what i did. I showed how much money what im doing can potentially make or save and suddenly they are willing to shill out 10 times the initial offer.

>>731774263
Send shekels and I'll help.

>>731785472
Oh I could go on for hours about how TRUEVISION SYSTEMS is a scam company that noone should ever consider doing any business with.

>Promise me raise after 90 review if I meet benchmarks
Never Gives me review, keeps dodging question when I ask for review

>Promise me stock options and 401k matching
Changed mind, cannot afford that

>Laid off, promised to keep me on for 2-3 months as a consultants to finish my projects
Wouldn't return my calls or emails after I left the door.

Fuck employers, time is my life. I owe you exactly what we agree you'll pay me for, nothing more. 'I can hire pajeet from Derkistan for 30k less a year and he'll be willing to put in 30 hrs a week overtime for free.' Great. You'll find yourself old with no grandchildren because men cant find jobs due to Pajeet and affirmative action, and woman having no interest in men who make less than them. Your lineage will die off, but hey at least you got some job performance bonuses.

>>731774263
>Lots of money
>Double STEM major
>no Job
I smell a trust fund bitch boi

>>731784694

Personally its don't be conceited, (at least for us we post the salary range for the we are hiring for)
The salary ranges are all competitive, no not the highest but we don't pay crap either.
If we have a job that asks for say 5-7 years experience for X and the salary range is 70-80.
You come in with less than 2 years experience and start asking for 130 for no other reason than you think you deserve it. Bye.

And also do not be stereotypical, not even kidding. i had a girl come in, with a start talking about celebrity gossip during an interview Kardashian this, that and some other stuff because a question was what are her interests.
The single biggest thing that people who are hiring don't like about millennial ( its not the entitlement sense, its not the classic they are lazy or whatever because i know many many are not) its that in many surveys, most plan to leave the job they are at every 2-3 years or less. That is another big No No if you are in an interview DO NOT say you plan to job hop even if you are.

It is hard out there i really do know because i have been though shit that you guy, a lot of shit is going on right now, revolutionary things such as OP's machine learning and big data that are going to change the way jobs are done. Some departments are betting big on that.
Jobs that were important 5 years ago are losing their luster and others are gaining more value even if they are not seen that way right now.
Try to see how things are going by reading articles about trends do some personal analysis on how to transform your skills you have into something that is really in demand.

example : Ok fine you love art, great. How many jobs out there for artists or better yet how many actual artists make a living doing it compared to the amount trying to make a living doing it.
Well take those art skills and learn a little graphics editing, now you can do marketing, or do some sound work and get a job with a production company, They are all artistic

>>731779969
Bro, you just need to get a good gun instead, then things will be fine.

OP I've hired dozens of people in my life. I'd skip over your resume if it was handed to me. Your resume screams weirdo.

>>731785847
It used to be the case that a job will take car of you and you could stick with it until you retire.
Now (from my experience) they offer no real paths of ascension and an extremely rigid pay increase structure. If you have any hope of advancing your career you'll jump ship, lest being stuck in the same gig at similar pay for life.

Tell me, why should we have any loyalty to an employer, where at the slightest downturn in the market they'll happily lay us off?

>>731786002
That's my gramps m4 from ww2 brah

I own several badass guns as well.

>>731785801
I saw how those pajeets work, i freelanced some projects to them. Their code is as clean as their designated streets and functional only for the specific case you ask for written in the most basic method. They can work hard but they never get the results. That is why india and china have always been behind the countries who know how to use a toilet. If they are hiring those, they already stopped growing and grasping at straws.

>>731786052
How so? Im not disagreeing, but would like assistance.

>>731786102
Heh I didn't say that either, I just said don't be stupid and say it during getting hired :)
because i have had people explicitly say they didn't think they would be here in 3-4 years in interviews.

I was a consultant for a LONG time. talking 1 year here, 8 months there, maybe 2 years here.

Unless its my company ( which i had for a while but got tired of doing sales and technical at the same time) I have no loyalty to any job.

>>731785465
if you're going to keep dropping Kafka's name like we haven't all read The Metamorphosis, I suggest you take life with some grace like his main character...he woke up one day as a fucking beetle and he's not as whiny as you

>>731785563
only if i get fake boobs too

>>731786269
I will give advice for what i can to get you hired but after that its upto you to not F it up.

>>731785815
anyone just joining this thread: this is the tl;dr version

>>731786376
Internet didn't exist back then; today hed probably be all over 4chan complaining about being a beetle.

>>731785847
As a millennial (not OP), I actually really appreciate this advice. I'm pretty afraid of the job market but I feel a little more confident with this insight, thanks.

>>731786269
Decent advice, though don't think I've made this mistake. My father (may he burn in hell) told me about how he'd have people say things like "I wanna be your boss" and shit. Resume in the trash.

>>731774263
Wendy's is hiring. You can be a chef and make $8.75 an hour.

>>731778025
You aren't getting jobs because no one is going to read all that shit.

Write a basic and to the point can ver letter.
Your resume should be as terse as possible without being lazy.

A resume like that is going to important people who don't have enough time to fucking read 1000 resumes.

Use your brain dingus.

>>731786668
*Cover letter

>>731786479
1. Do not be afraid of it ( Confidence is great, smug/conceited level is not....just try to walk that line)
2. Prepare to not get exactly what you want and if you do, more power to you.
3.If you get any experience, use it to leverage other things beyond it, even if they are just barely related.

Hell I used to work at Target for a little while.
The store manager there at the time was a nice guy but he wasn't some MBA or had even been with Target that long. The dude had a fucking landscaping degree and just had management experience from a previous company

Use anything to get anything else.

>>731774263
You can start by solving this easy problem:
Is a group of order 5 abelian? Prove it.

We'll go on from there.

>>731786811
Nice dubs
I'm actually just a sophomore in college, but all the things I've been hearing lately make the prospects seem pretty bleak.
I'm just glad to hear that it's more about mettle than anything else, and also that someone with more maturity and knowledge could tell me a little more about how it's like.

>>731782055
You need to figure out the difference between plural and possessive acronyms.

>>731774263
Move to New Mexico. They have the lowest average height in the US. Or fly to the phillipines and buy yourself a wife. It's not as disgusting as it sounds.

>>731786585
Yeaaaaa don't do that....hahaha I did that one time when i was asked as to describe what job i wanted ( when i was interviewing for a lower level one because it had the line "opportunity for rapid advancement"
I ended up describing the Director of that departments job, he got irritated with me...never got a call back even though i had all other qualifications.

>>731786939
Okay, examples? I'm not saying you're wrong but I'd had my resume proof read by multiple people who work in hr and have not had that issue.

>>731786925

I didn't vote for trump ( Or Hillary for that matter, i wrote my own fucking name in, because i could and i could say i voted but for neither one of those morons :-D ) but i have just about as much disdain for mass media as the white house does.
The media is so fatalistic/sensationalist in both liberal and conservative ways they are becoming TV clickbait just because of the attention grabbing titles/news ops they have to do to get people to watch.

Since you are still in college, best advice i can give is If you even remotely know what your degree will be in, start talking to companies that have those needs. Summer learning sessions / internships / volunteer work with those companies and one of the best ways to get insight about the market you are going too step into even if people won't talk to you is just look at job postings in that field about what skills they advertise that they want.

Also FOR EVERYONE, as long as you are not trying for a job as a personal trainer or ballet dancer, pick up at least some programming knowledge if you can.

And no its not as bad as everyone screams about. As with any time in history though, and as i said before. Some jobs are on the rise, others are being eliminated or modified to something else. Those who can't handle the chaos/adapt to the flexibility of having to change are the ones that will have real issues.

That is one thing that "Millennials" definitely have in general have over older generations for the most part is being better at flexibility..
that is unless they are the rabid SJW type who tries to change everyone else to their side even when they don't want to hear it.

Well this is fun, just had a major depressive breakdown, basically over the futility of my life. Again everything feels kafkaesque
>Girls are into guys who comfortable and secure around them
>Get comfortable and secure through multiple successful encounters
>Very few, so no dice for me

>Can't find job, why not get an internship to get more experience?
>Internships I apply to tell me they need someone with more professional experience.

I'd bite a bullet right now if I didnt know that it's just make god laugh.

File: 0005.jpg (20KB, 720x442px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 720x442px

>>731774263
>How do I pull myself together?
...
>5'8 manlet
Sorry but you can't

>>731778068
How can you be a near expert in anything if you've only sold mattresses?

In my opinion, you can only be an expert in something if you've done it professionally and provided advice to other professionals. No matter his much you actually know, applying that to a situation with profit/jobs on the line is where expert status comes in.

>>731774263
solid 7
> 7

>>731788983
I'm not, but it's standard resume bullshit. They assume I'm exaggerating so if I put "intermediate" theyd assune I really meant "fuck all"

>>731789093
Yeah, but its too jarring. If you want to lie about being an expert you have to have the work history on the resume where that could have happened. Your resemue lies come off as blatant, rather than mere puffery.

You'd be better just listing your skills, rather than grading them.

I look at your work history selling mattresses and then you telling me you're an expert in statistical analysis.

Trash.

>>731789093
the hell job were you applying for anyways?

>>731778025

Saying that you have all that experience and writing your CV in word. Next time do it in LaTeX and see the job applications going through.

Your resume is ass to be honest. It's all waffle and doesn't get to the details that people hiring you want to know.

>What's your experience
>What are your qualifications
>Do you have potential

Its way too wordy, the graphs are cringe, lots of grammatical errors. You have no experience (work or volunteer) on your resume either. Put down anything and everything that's relevant to the job you're going for. Most people start part-time work from around age 12-15 and make sure you have volunteer work on your resume, even if it's "helped out a little league soccer team on weekends" n shit.

In the interview they generally wanna know a few basic things

>is this guy's resume for real
>is he a cunt, a douche, stuck up, bossy or an asshole
>will he fit into the team
>is he reliable and consistent

Lastly, move. You have nothing tying you down and you're young as fuck still with no obligations. Go for jobs in other countries and if you can get the fuck out of the city.