Whats the cringiest thing you've ever done /b? I'll Start..
>be me
>be few weeks ago at uni
>all my friends are going out to some bar that has karaoke
>say fuck it and go out since last week of class
>get super fucking drunk
>almostblackedout.png
>get to bar
>everyone putting there name and the song they want in
>in drunken state decide I want to sing too
>go up to DJ and request song
>all my friends go up and do there song
>all pretty popular songs
>almost everyone in the bar sings along to every song
>" Alright next up, anon, will anon please come to the stage"
>my turn
>at this point I was stupid drunk
>go up and start belting out this song at the top of my lungs
>music sounds louder than everyone else's songs think the DJ just turned it up
>in my head im absolutely killing it,
>can hardly hear the music over how loud im singing
>song ends and i look up
>everyone in huge bar staring not saying a word
>my mfw when the song was I Miss You by Blink-182
>mfw nobody sung along just stood around awkwardly
>literally ran out of the bar all my friends laughing their asses off
share stories also general cringe thread
How the fuck OP
> dancing with *dykes* to get some pussy smell around me
> getting people to think I'm queer as folk
> friend zone so hard some random grandmas on the street through me kisses and I actually respond in kindness
>>731748990
>be me
>lvl 21 some shity job in netherlands, i dont speek dutch
>its break time i want to eat
>wow cool machine with cool food
>fck i have only paper money
>and in my poor english some women if thay can change my money
>thay dont understood
>thay give me their food im embrased and try to deny but its to hard so i take from them that sandwich and go to my sit
>after a while thay still give food, some fruits and other stuff
>never have been so embrased in my life
>>731748990
>I Miss You by Blink-182
>>731748990
well thay wont miss you for sure
>>731748990
>don't waste your time on me your already a voice inside my <inaudible>
>>731749210
How the fuck what
>be me, 13 years old
>friends dare me to dive into a trash container
>say I'll do it for money
>they accept
>go around asking for more money
>I actually dive into a container
>teacher rushes to get me out of there
>made about $50
> Be at friends party
> Girl with amazing ass talks to me about random shit
>Girl seems interested, but I am to retarded to notice
>Fast forward about 2 hours
>Girl and me sitting alone on couch, asks me why I got a blanket on me
>"Well my feet are cold, can't feel them"
>She offers to rub them for me, does it for about 2 minutes
>"Thanks, that felt good."
>Girl leaves and does not talk to me anymore
My friends cousin who also looked nice rubbed my thigh when I say I was cold outside, reacted the same way.
1 year later and I was thinking back at that moment, realize how autistic I was.
>>731751580
Don't feel bad, anon. Signs are hard to read.
I never go to any parties, but I decided to go to one my friend's organized after our high school prom. Like 4 different girls offered my alcohol, one of them tried to get me to drink like 5 times, I rejected all of them. 3 years later I still can't tell if they liked me or if they were just being nice.
>>731751580
Its ok anon autism is what brings all of us here
>>731752093
Assume the latter, play for the former.
>3 am on Saturday night
>browse /b/
>>731752713
its 4 am for me
>be me
>at school, next class is in about an hour
>crush arrives "hi anon", she sits next to me
>didn't sleep last night, ask her if I can lean on her and sleep for a minute
>"sure anon"
>wake up an hour later, she's still there, my face is on her lap
>realize I drooled all over her from her arm to her lap
I don't know if she realized. She was friendly to me at the moment and even a day after that, but then for some reason she stopped talking to me. Literally, I would go up to her and she ignored me while I was talking to her face. Oh well, she's a weeaboo now so whatever.
>>731752448
Quality advice.
>>731751580
live and learn bro
we all fucked up one time or another lel
better to have fucked up than never had the chance to fuck up at all
>>731752967
most emberasing so far
>>731748990
>Be me
>decide to start talking to a 8/10
>Only thing I said was "Hi", and then walked away
>Jump to a week later
>Once again say "Hi, the names Nick"
>Jump to another week
>Say "hi", and walk away
>Eventually I began to think I was acting too wierd
>stopped doing anything
>kept walking past
>mfw I actually did this stupid shit.
>>731753645
kek
>>731749471
Had something similar happen.An old german guy bought me a strudel once because I looked like a bum.I still ate it though.
Happened tonight
>be me
>taking kids rollerskating
>monster boobed girl handing out skates
>completely hypnotized by her fat tits
>girl hands me skates and tells me to "have fun"
>say "you too"
Gah retard me. But srsly epic fat girl tits
>>731748990
>ride bicycle all the way to the other side of the city
>fall into mud
>ride home with mud all over my back
>random people stare and laugh
>>731753342
Thx.
>>731753873
xD
it was bad for me couse i thay propably throu i was asking them for money for food! can you imagin that?
>Be me
>19 in second year of college
>Be in second year Japanese class
>there's this cute girl with a portal sticker on her phone
>too autistic to talk to her
>I'm actually pretty outspoken in class maybe even funny sometimes
>she suggests we should hang out sometime in the middle of class
>I respond "yeah we should all hang out sometime" while looking at the two classmates next to us
>realize I just publicly rejected her like a faggot
>near the end of the semester there's an art festival
>just the two of us in class before anyone else gets there
>tells me she's going with some friends, asks me if I have any plans to go
>tell her I don't know
>conversation just dies
Why do I cuck myself like this? I just don't understand. Literally on a silver platter and I'm too fucking retarded to just say yes.
>>731754133
wtf and that was most cringy in your life? pff
>>731754362
Ok, you're beyond redemption.
>>731754362
>college
>japanese class
Dafuq
What college?
>>731754861
collage of faggotery
>>731754477
Yeah, my life is pretty simple
>>731754520
It gets worse
>18, freshman in college
>be in my English class
>notice this cute short-haired, light skinned Arab girl
>kind of tomboyish but still pretty feminine
>I actually ask her out to the football game
>she says maybe, gives me her number
>the day of the game text me and tells me she's going
>I go to the stadium and meet up with her and her friend
>I'm kind of awkward because I didn't expect her friend to come along but in reality I'm just a retard anyways
>I get a text from a friend of mine and convince them to come hangout with some of my high school friends
>they sit at the end of the row talking to eachother while I hangout with my friends
>eventually she tells me "hey anon it's getting kind of hot, wanna head back to campus?"
>I tell her "sure, they have buses right outside the stadium, you can leave whenever you want"
>her and her friend leave
>don't realize what I said until days after
I should be put to the sword.
>getting drunk before karaoke
Is this an American tradition?
>>731755147
the sword is too good for you
>>731754861
I thought Japanese would be pretty common as a foreign language based on demand? Where do you go to college?
>>731755147
Well, at least now you realize it, no?
>>731755290
They teach a bunch of different languages at my college. I don't know if Japanese is one of them, but they teach French, Italian, Spanish and English for foreigners.
>>731748990
I was cringy as fuck in HS I was so close to becoming a weeb it's not even funny.
Drunk stories are fun. I made out with a fatty at a bar when I was hammered. In my mind she was a solid 8/10. Then while I had my tongue in her mouth I realized that my buds and everyone else was looking at me like WTF??? One of my buds pulled me away and after I sobered up they showed me pics they'd taken of this piggish slob. Yuck.
>>731752967
Lol shit man that would suck
>>731748990
Not that cringy but more embarrassing
>In military
>In my advanced training after Boot
>we are required to wear hats (covers) anytime we are outside
>wake up a little late for class, not too late, if i rush to get my uniform together I can make it to march-off
>get dressed in record time
>whereishat.png
>can't find my cover anywhere
>remember my roommate was talking about how he couldn't find his cover last night
>figure that he must have taken it
>walk outside in uniform w/o cover
>look like giant asshole
>have to walk to the other side of base to buy a new cover from the exchange
>start walking out pass some Petty Officers
>they yell at me
>I explain my situation
>They understand but tell me to put my hand on my head all the way to the Exchange
>Walk past Quarterdeck with hand on head
>Walk past my division with hand on head
>Walk past Admin Building with hand on head
>Walk past CO with hand on head, he laughs
>Walk past more NCOs with hand on head
>They laugh
>finally make it to Exchange and pay $15 for new cover
>Get to class 30 mins late
>Have to explain why I'm so late
>Get back home that night and fuck up roommate for being an asshole
>Go to sleep
Don't know if anyone will find this interesting, but I thought it was worth sharing
>>731754133
Fucking seriously? Wow dude, how did you not go home and kill yourself after that horribly horribly embarrassing situation? I wouldn't be able to walk outside ever again, frankly! Fuck you
>>731755287
This is my last major failure besides a couple of disappointing dates
>be18 freshman in sociology 101 class
>notice this redhead girl in first row all semester that is pretty outspoken
>develop a crush on her
>muster up the courage to talk to her on literally the last day possible
>we are just supposed to show up to class and hand in our papers
>I wake up early to make sure not to miss her
>hand in my paper and wait outside for an hour and a half for her to show up
>she goes in and hands her paper
>starts walking off and I follow her
>looks back every once in a while and I pretend to be looking at the squirrels
>she goes to the library
>eventually I sit down next to her
>"hey you're X from Ms. Teach class right? I just wanted to know where we're supposed to turn in our papers"
>she tells me the time period is over and I should shoot her an email
>ask her how to email a teacher
>she explains
>sit there awkwardly for twenty minutes pretending to study
>decide to leave
>"thanks for the help, would you like to get some coffee sometime?"
>"uhh thanks anon but I have to study for finals right now"
>"ok maybe some other time"
>I actually add her on FB and she accepts
>we actually start talking
>she likes comics, video games
>meet her again at some club day or whatever
>convinces me to go to her club thing
>end up joining her club and going to meetings for like a year just to try and see her every once in a while
>eventually ask her out to lunch walking out of a meeting at like 9 pm in pitch black
>can't even remember the rejection
>leave club after my uncle killed himself
>never saw her, never went back
>>731755827
haha EPIC dude
>>731755627
We had a whole Japanese minor that people could do, I did it out of interest but ended up using the credits to fulfill a language requirement.
>>731748990
I came in here and responded to this post
just today, fun enough. At least, that I remember.
>be me, today, 18
>at work
>talking to one of my managers
>she's ok. Most fun of coworkers to talk to. Gets memes. 6/10 too short (I'm 6' and hate feeling like a giant. Go figure most of my coworkers are less than 5'8". Laugh it up, but 4 inches made all the difference in your girl [original joke {50 layers of irony}])
>she makes some chillatas (like the lovechild of a milkshake and a smoothie)
>making chillata puns/jokes back and forth. Normally a master, but I'm a bit off so i get my ass handed to me
>she takes blender off the blenderpad
>explodes up
>don't say anything
>she goes to squirt chocolate sauce into it bc she forgot before
>say first thing that comes into my head
>"everything you touch explodes"
>not trying to be sexual. just making a statement.
>she gives me a signature look that idk how to describe just imagine someone laughing and appearing somewhat angry but maybe a dash of appreciation for the joke and it's just impossible to really describe
>"what?"
>she mentions it's a sex thing
throughout the rest of the workday, I continue to accidentally make sexual innuendos.
>pic related
at one point, I say
>"I should have worn gloves. I don't like my hands feeling all cold and wet."
and she gives me that same signature look.
>"What? Tell me HOW that's a thing. What, like Elsa from Frozen?"
idk the full context, but at one point i also end up saying
>"I smile when I hate myself"
>was smiling throughout the day
>Me and girl are no longer together
>Text her late one night asking how she's doing
>no response
>Next day text her that I still think about her and hope she's doing well
>no response
>Next day ask her why she won't talk to me
>no response
>Tell her sorry I upset her and never text her again
I hate that she's somewhere in this world thinking of me as pathetic.
>>731756907
It's ok anon. If it makes you feel better, I think of you as pathetic too.
>>731755147
you are cancer
>>731757093
I'm definitely pathetic, I just hate that she specifically thinks I am.
>>731757633
But that's the thing, what makes you pathetic is that you care what she thinks. Stop self-pitying yourself, start hating yourself. You need to force a dichotomy between past you and present you. Hate your past-self and blame him for your failures. At least that's how I live with mine.
>>731756907
>texting your ex
only young people and retards do this
>>731757966
I am at least one of those things.
Possibly both.
>>731748990
"Anon, you can touch me,"
"Nah, it's okay,"
It wasn't okay
>>731748990
Okay, somewhat old story but still makes me cringe.
>Be me, 10 year old autist.
>Play game with only friend which literally involves seeing how high you can
>hit a sponge ball
>Both have a tennis racket.
>Two assholes in my year keep taking the ball
>Leave for five minutes
>Come back
>Friend looks pissed off
>points
>They have the ball...
>Although I was a scrawny autist; I was really fucking aggressive.
>Get within a few metres, throw the racket like a frisbee
>He ducks
>Hits a kid in the bottom year
>Look of shock. turns to horror.
>Blood everywhere
>He had to get stitches in his eyebrow.
>Have to write formal apology.
>Years later, still feel like a massive douche.