>Be me edgemaster 13 yo >decide to get my sister to sleep

>>731161758
not that evil just pedo

>>731161758
your mom should have aborted you, fucking dirtbag.
Treat women better, they should be protected, not treated like a sex object

>>731161758
>be in colleg
>there is this one humongous asshole
>bullies everyone constantly, even I were targeted
>one time tried to resist him, got a beating
>last straw.png
>find out his class shedules
>wait until break
>sneak inside the classroom, open his laptop
>asshole is stupid enough to not use passwords

>pull out my memory stick and hide a certain folder inside his computer
>cheese pizza
>send a pedophiliac comment via facebook
>dumb shit had password saved
>gets reported to authories, police finds the folder
>gets arrested
>everyone dislikes him
>his parents disowned him

>he an hero inside his cell
>lol

>be 11 year old me
>See nest of Canadian geese eggs
>Grab a big stick and smash them
>See the mother with the babies in her mouth later
> Feel kinda bad

Yeah I'm not a very evil person honestly

>>731163121
Kek good man

>>731163121
thathappened.jpg

Give us his name, liar.

Or, more accurately, come up with faintly plausible reason why you won't give name.

/Later...

Yeah. I thought so.

>>731163121
Literally none of this is true.

I sexually harassed a middle aged woman via text message when I was 11.

>>731163475
Especially the first line.

Should be
>be in mom's basement

>>731163121
getting bullied in college? Damn son, that's sad.

>>731163320

>You did good, Anon... you did good.

>>731163588
checked.

via text message? Truly the unsolvable crime.

Give details. What happened?

>>731163595
*colleg

>>731163408
His name was Rick Grimes

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>>731161758
I came out to my parents despite being an only child

>>731163701

ahh grimey

I was having a casual relationship with a girl from a super religious family. She ended up getting pregnant after the condom broke once. She wanted to keep it and I made her get an abortion. I obviously paid for the procedure but I didn't go with her for it.

>>731163121
this didn't happen and you're most likely a teenager

>>731161758
>started fapping to mom

Kek

>>731163992
It's a good job you're here, pointing out the fucking obvious, innit?

>>731164124
>only a fool..

>>731163923
This makes you a good person if anything. You stopped her from ruining her life. So what if you weren't there.

>>731164124
It's a good job you're here, pointing out the anon pointing out the fucking obvious, innit?

>>731164288
Everybody gives me shit for not going with her for the procedure.

>be 16 with a shitty car
>driving down south side Chicago
>see a bunch of niggers on a corner
>yell out "FUCKING NIGGERS"
>light turns green and I drive away
>they start chasing me
>one of them gets hit by a car
>not too hard but enough to make me lose my shit
>I drive home
My only regret is that more of them didn't get hit

>>731164335
It's a good job you're here pointing out the anon pointing out the anon pointing out the fucking obvious, innit?

>>731161758
Also groped my lil sis once. Didn't go to far and she didn't wake up. Was 18, she was 15.
I feel still horrible about it.

>>731161758
If that's evil, then I'm satan.
Go to "friends" house with other "friend"
Steal all his clothes and take his father's alcohol
Go to other friends house and drink
Too drunk, too young, omggg.jpg
Tell the friend, the one that owns the house, his dad raped him because he didn't care about him. Truly happened. Said it infront of everyone.
Get his sister drunk, both of them.
Sister's BF aka my best friend already passed out
We fooled around right next to him, too drunk to wake up.
Next day "friend" that got all his clothes and alcohol stolen was grounded for having bad friends for the rest of the summer.

>>731164350
It probably wasn't yours anyway. Religious girls are sluts.

>>731164486
The biggest pussy in the thread right here.

>>731163822
what's so bad about this

>>731164282
>>only a fool..
...doesn't finish his sentences.

>be me, 6
>be in swimming bath
>want to jump from the 3m diving board
>5yo girl in front of me
>she's afraid of the height
>I wait for what felt like hours
>was maybe just 2 minutes or so, I had no sense of time back then
>get enough of her shit
>push her down
>she falls 3 meters deep on water
>lands ungraceful, got hurt somehow
>jump down
>her mother runs at me, screaming, how could I push that little girl and shit
>shrug and say "I got pushed myself and grabbed for something to hold on"
>behind me in line was a 13yo boy
>the boy got a house ban for "pushing a child and hurting another"
>I got free icecream afterwards to "soften the shock"
>mfw

It's not THAT evil, now that I think of, but the only somehow evilest thing I could remember from my childhood

>>731163657
>was 11
>homeschooled, no friends
>want to feel like i have a social life, so i get the phone number of a friend of a friend of a cousin
>start texting, unaware it was actually her mother
>i honestly can't remember what i was taking about at first
>this goes on for about a day
>then i start getting weird and sexual because i'm an autismo kid
>not like i want to pound her, but just really cringy sexual humor that i probably learned from the internet
>i start saying i have dead hookers under my bed. i thought at the time i made it clear it was a "joke"
>apparently the audience didn't laugh
>after a while i get a call from a cop
>asks my name and i freak out. never been so scared in my life
>hang up and pretend everything will be ok
>live in constant paranoia for a few days trying to figure out what to do
>eventually mom finds out that the cops had been called on me from an off-handed comment from aunt since I guess she'd heard about it
>mom freaks out, i freak out that mom knows
>eventually mom gets in contact with a detective and makes clear that i'm not actually a serial killer
>i got off scot-free, but it kinda fucked me up and made me a lot more paranoid even to this day.
>also mom thought for a while and probably still thinks I'm some kind of sociopath. maybe i am.

>>731162686
Here comes the white knight to the rescue!

I once fapped to the whatsapp selfies of my female classmates, just because i could.

It's not that bad actually.

>>731164843
>being this retarded

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>be me
>be in kindergarten
>ride a bike while playing outside
>some roastie I didn't like suddenly gets on my bike
>notonmywatch.gif
>bail from bike
>girl falls and starts crying
>gets taken to the hospital
>had to get some headwound glued
>mfw

>>731164907
This is a thread about evil things you've done, not autistic things.

>16
>white
>drinking with all white people
>black kid comes over (small minority where I live)
>tries to be cool
>drinks as much as possible all at once
>passes out
>friends are all in a circle talking, laughing
>one friend turns around, spots me
>"a-are you peeing on him, anon?"
>All friends are in shock, I bust out laughing, still peeing, "Ha! YEAH!"
>Everyone joins in, all taking turns peeing on him
>Black kid transfers schools a month later.
I'm not racist, but I honestly could care less.

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>>731165323
> I'm not racist, but I honestly could care less.
It's COULDN'T, you dumbfuck

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> Grade 7 french class
> Sitting beside a kid who admittedly molested his cat
> Sharpen my pencil real sharp
> Hold it to the corner of his eye
> Call his name
> Turns his head and rams the lead like a quarter inch right into his eyeball.
> Oh no fucking way!
> Kid is now blind in his right eye

>>731165538
Already spotted the error, anon.
Congrats you autistic fuck.

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>>731164852

>be me around 18
>broke as fuck
>fuck it still want to get drunk
>buddy and me break in neighbors basement
>drink a bottle of wine, steal some beers and a mid-tier whisky for later
>before we leave friend pisses in wine bottle
>we leave it there

Neighbors never brought it up, but thinking about his face when I imagine him opening the piss bottle still makes me chuckle.

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>be me
>be selfish
>mom takes me to grandparents sometimes to see them
>always end up standing there awkwardly not saying anything for like an hour
>they're nice to me and give me candy and shit but all I can think of is how much I wanna go home and play vidya
>one time I find grammys peelz
>they're the capsule kind
>take a handful of them
>mom is in the living room talking to her
>say I'm gonna get an ice cream sandwich or some shit
>put peelz in her coffee pot while it's brewing
>they dissolve entirely
>she gets the coffee later
>drinks it but nothing happens
>stillwaiting.png
>we go home after like 2 hours and I'm pissed I had to stay the whole time
>find out 2 days later my grandma had a heart attack
>she had a weak heart from smoking and the pills were blood thinners
>didn't survive
>mfw

>>731161758
OP, you sound alot like my step brother, mom and stepdad keept me away from the fucker for years, this reminded me how much i wanted to find that cunt.

>>731163320
They're on the invasive list you fuck wit you have a legal right to smash thier eggs. You are Beta mate and you didn't even know it...

>>731165609
Kid deserved it. Who brags about molesting his cat?

I have peed in the following things of my gf's sister:
>orange juice
>eye drops
>shoes
>stereo amp
>laundry (clean)

>>731165873
Did i ask you about your brother?
Go fuck yourself

>be 15
>be asshole with asshole friends
>broke into private school that was locked up for the summer
>found the students' storage rooms
>stole loads of sports equipment
>pawned it all
>went out for steak dinner

>>731165319
Fair enough, but it felt evil at the time. I felt like a fugitive.

Fucked my former friend's ex who he was still desperately, obsessively in love with multiple times a week for about 2 years.

He never found out. We're not friends anymore basically because I got tired of him being a melodramatic little faggot all the time. If he did ever learn what I did, though, even today, he'd probably actually try to kill me.

>>731165873
Not OP, but I might be your step brother.
You want to find me to have gay sex with me, right?

>killed five kittens by jumping on them when I was three

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>>731161758
This one time I got mad and I took a knife and...

You know those do not remove under penalty of law tags they put in mattresses? Well I cut one of 'em off. I got a bad temper.

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>>731166157
AHHHHH! HAHA

>>731165862
Probably most evil thing ITT so far.
You literally killed your own grandmother. Fuck. Did anybody find out it was your fault?

>>731164606
Absolutely fucking gold.

>at girls basketball house party
>drunk, feel heavy diarrhea
>go to upstairs off limits bathroom
>letterrip
>finish up realize there's no toilet paper
>grab a white hand towel and wipe my disgusting creamy shit ass up with it
>Toss it into the sink cabinet behind some cleaning supplies
>girls basketball house wouldn't have a party for months
>when they did it was super private but I still got in cuz I knew people
>30 minutes into their parties they'd start freaking out frantically kicking out people and going full bitch mode on them

It never struck me that it was probably all my fault

>>731162686
sexobject? that is what they are men are made to make kids 24/7

>>731166238
Seriously?

Coupleoffaggots.jpg

>>731165538
Hes not wrong though, just diffrent phrasing

>>731166023
Go fuck urself anon, not even funny. The day i find that cunt, I'ma blow his fucking head off.

>>731166253
Yeah he's on par or worse than shovel dog.

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>>731166253
lol no they just thought 'yeah she was old I guess it was gonna happen eventually'

felt a little bad when my mom cried, which was a lot, but other than that I don't care, we weren't close

> be at summercamp
> Aspie kid has fanny pack, relies on fanny pack
> Leaves fanny pack in common area
> Hide fanny pack
>Kek.jpg
> Aspie kid loses his shit
> Lol at aspie kid
> Couple hours later aspie kids parents show up
> Kid had "medication" in fanny pack
> Move fanny pack to trash can from hiding spot (inside a vending machine)
> "Find" fanny pack
> Councelors know I stole it, but no proof
> Try to ban me from Summercamp, call my parents
> Maintain innocence

Sorry, aspie kid. I was trying to be an edgy fuck :(.

>>731166412
Yeah, yeah blow me faggot.. I'll be waiting.
You say tomato I say tamoto.
TOMATO!
TAMOTO!
Gonna go fuck my cousin TOMORROW!

>>731166285
post ass

posted the nigger word on the internet

>>731166554
Any way u could tell me where u from?

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>>731161758

>>At a party
>>Frat type dudes show up
>>Being early 20's drinking MGD bottles twist off caps
>>Only had a six pack and was hanging out by fridge
>>Frat bros try to take one of my beers
>>Said they were mine and to drink someone else's shit
>>Bros wander off pissed
>>Get idea
>>Start saving the caps
>>Take each beer I finish into the bathroom with me
>>Fill each empty bottle with my piss
>>Put cap back on
>>Put Piss Beer back in fridge in six pack holder
>>Repeat this process until whole six pack is drank and refilled as piss beer
>>Sit back and wait
>>Watch as one by one the beers start to disappear from the fridge throughout the night
>>MFW people drank my piss

>>731165862
That's fucking dark mate.

>Fat whale wants to fuck
>no
>Please????
>I SAID NO, dumb cunt..
>been going on for a year or so, but persistent as hell today.
>Fine... But only if you let me pee on you
>okay, but not the face, anon
>pisses on her
>she goes off to take a shower, I have someone pick me up before she gets out
>Still not enough integrity to stop talking to me

>>731166739
Nah faggot, you play my games, not the other way around. Either man up or fuck off.

>>731166592
Ew no

>>731165862
That's really fucked up, bro.. Lol, so fucked up..

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>>731161758
> dating girl for a while
> meet her family etc.
> her mom lives in a basement suite
> moms bf is sketchy mofo
> few month's pass
> she's crying, angry, distraught
> mothers bf had been molesting her little sister
> had even begun raping her when opportunity presented itself
> her sister is 8
> mothers bf is m.i.a. with warrant out
> gf agrees to have little sister sleep over until he is caught and mom moves
> few weeks go by
> little sister sleeps like a brick because she's on melatonin in Nyquil
> can't sleep otherwise.
> gf asks if I can watch her alone over the weekend while she settles her mother in a town over
> "sure.. She's pretty self sufficient anyhow."
> terrible thoughts invade my mind Friday night
> I make noise, prod the girl, literally try to wake her up..
> won't wake up.. Best response is grunts and shifts
> Saturday night
> I made sure she had a bit extra of the sleep aides..

>>731166151
</thread>

>>731163320
Hate those assholes

>>731166904
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqI2ikfbIrg

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>>731166992

>>731162686
How does it feel knowing you are a beta cuck?

>>731161758
>be me, 17
>gf is 16
>take her virginity
>it's like 3am because we have to sneak around, teenagers
>I pass out after I cum
>never finished her off

It was a huge night for her, but I just couldn't be bothered. She was all giddy and excited but I was too tired from that school sleep schedule, and it wasn't MY first time, so whatever.

>>731164486
lies
anon probably locked his doors and rolled up his windows and faced the other way

>>731161758
>used to capture snakes and field mice
>the field mice were usually just stepped on
>snakes were uses as sacrifices
>placing a live snake in a sobe bottle full to the cap with gasoline
>it did fine fkr about a minute or two
>then it started vomiting blood and squirming
>it just stopped randomly and was dead

This is only one small instance of this, we would catch hundreds of snakes and mice and more than 90% were killed in some fucked up way. The other 10% got shot with a .22

>>731161758
Wincest?

>>731166832
That's hilarious.

>>731166966
c'mon

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>>731167251

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>>731167139
Pfft.. She was already damaged goods by that point.

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>>731161758
Molested sister, molested cousin and some other kids not sure it it fully counts because i was molested first and coxed into it but i convinced my friend to molest my sister. i've destroyed most of my friends lives to the point they are jobless depressed husks I've got some addicted to drugs then made fun of them for it and they are still hooked and suicidal. i don't know man i've just been fucking shit up all the time. why do you ask op?

>>731165609
bullsht would have gotten some sort of legal punishment and would have been expelled

>>731166904
I really hope you are the one you are pretending to be, cause I'm about to pull up nigger

> at party with qt3.14
> bong passed amongst bros in back room
> bong doesn't hit well
> bro going to clean it
> dumps bong water into cup
"Who can we get to drink this?"
> give cup to qt3.14
> smells it, drinks it
"What is it anon?"
> didn't think she'd get past the smell
> mfw she drinks it
Instant regret. She was expecting me to look out for her, not fuck around highed up.
> rebounded: got her to drink vodka straight to get the taste out of her mouth
> she got trashed and sloppy. Takes me outside "for air"
> thinking I might get to play with some titties as I take her shirt off at the hood of my car
> mfw she straight up tries to rape me on the hood of my car
> I let it happen..

>>731165984
fake , pawned shit would have be traced back to school and you would have been a juvy bitch for a month or so

>>731162686
Why should they be protected if the are not sexual objects?
Don't tell you you actually think they are people anon

>>731165645
That may be true, but at least I didn't download the same image twice.

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>Be me, a catfish
>Get some autistic spic to fall in love with me
>Tell him I wanna live with him
>Tell him I found a nice place we could move in together to
>Previously told him that I got fired from walmart for fingering myself to his pictures while bagging groceries (he totally believed me)
>He thinks ima NEET
>Tell him I need 400$ for gas money to come see him
>He tells me he mailed me 400$
>Dont believe him
>Mail comes a week and a half later
>400$ and like 20 Tramadol pills
>Immediately I send him pic related with the message "I just nutted on your bitch's face, faggot"
>He gets sad and angry and starts messagung me like wtf
>I just mock him and call him a pathetic faggot because he lives with his mom
>I wanna keep milking him for money so I text him back later saying it was a joke
>He forgives me and said he was crying and wanted to kill himself, said never do anything like that again
>He starts saying cringey love shit
>Prolly the hardest I've ever laughed in my life

>>731167625
>"Rape"

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> find out drunk girl is pulling a train at a house party
> her brother showed up after she was already in the bedroom
> didn't know she was there
> told him "there's a train on some passed out slut in the back bedroom"
> figure he'll lose his shit and lulz will be had
> little did I know she was face down by that point
> mfw I come down the hall after a few minutes to see why no yelling and screaming
> mfw this girls own brother is laughing with a couple other guys while pounding down in his sister
> he nuts on her ass and heads to the kitchen for a beer
> when the story got out his family self destructed

>>731167645
No. Pawn shops did none of that in 1990. They asked for names and phone numbers, with no I.D. necessary. The steak was delicious.

>first to arrive at car crash that just happened
>look around for people to help
>i spot a guy, unconcious,blood everywhere
>his severed hand is two feet away from him
>i quicly proceed to take his severed hand and put it in my back pack
>other drivers show up and im back to acting like im running around trying to help

>>731167453
I mean, it did, kek. I don't know what to tell you. If you want more details I can provide. Not sure which part is unbelievable. She was bright eyed and excited, and I crushed her hopes like only a /b/tard slob could. She was cute af, but pretty below average intelligence. Homeschooled so she didn't get out much. I happened to live nearby, and was the only male who expressed open interest in her so she took it.

I don't know. This one time while my friends and I were out causing hell in our area. I got the bright idea to take these cement statues from somebody's yard and put them in the middle of the road on top of a hill.

>I was getting ready to move and I had pet rats I had to get rid of. So instead of just letting them go and risk an infestation. I decided to smash their babies with a hammer and get chop sticks impaled the adults and throw them into a brush fire.

I regret doing some of the bad things I've done. Some times I regret not doing worse. I'm not very proud of my treatment of animals in the past, however. Thankfully most of which were rodents.

>>731167968
what did you do with the hand dude ?

>>731167968
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtSgWZbL_kE ???

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>>731167968

>>731168149
i kept it in a jar at home for about 2 weeks,i then got a bit paranoid after a long smoking session and i took it to the park and threw it in the duck pond...Busnell park HFD CT

>>731167897
sauce on that gif?

>be in highschool
>10th grade approx.
>like older girl
>try to get with her
>rejected but with that "let's be friends" shit
>have to face her every day
>one day I just had a really shitty day
>go to her house at night
>slash her father's car tires
>felt much better
>move on with life

That probably cost the man a good bit to replace all 4 tires, especially coming for a lower economic situation. Your turn guys.

>>731168249
i have the wierdest boner right now....

>>731167968
HAHAHA WHAT THE FUCK!!! Why would you want a dismembered hand? so you don't have to sit on your own to make it feel like a stranger anymore?

>>731168110
>Speaking of rodents I had this "pet" adult rat that was given to me by a friend who was a sociopath. I checked the rat out and it bit me through a heavy rubber glove. I rinsed out the wound thoroughly with hydrogen peroxide and proceeded to shorten it's tail for weeks. Untill eventually I cut it too short. Who knew rats tails were so hollow by their body. So since I fucked that up I decided to see if I could prolong it's life and let it heal by pouring rubbing alcohol on the botched tail removal.

>It didn't like that and then proceed to die in the next few days.

>Don't fucking bite me.

>>731168416
yea ok..like you wouldnt want a strangers hand in jar...

i blackmailed 5 girls and i still message them when im bored making their days shitty

>>731168375
why would destroying the dude's tires get back at the girl...

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>>731165319
Autism is evil.

>>731168530
Some people just have low IQ, anon. Logic does not follow.

Coincidentally, people like this make up the vast majority of the GOP voter base.

>>731168523

Don`t know why but this made me giggle.
Such a dick move.

>>731168697
Aww, a bigot.

>>731168637
but it probably didn't make her life difficult at all

>>731168697
everyone heavily into politics is moronic
both sides are heavily corrupt
stop being a tool

>>731168697
>voting
What a fagot. I bet you pay taxes to

>Be 16
>In juvie for 3 months
>Guy I shared a room with was 13
>Tiny little guy, "cute" type
>He had been there for 2 months, had 4 more to go, never did ask what he did
>TLDR--Made him my juvie bitch, every night for 11 of my 12 weeks there I either fucked him or made him blow me

Irony of it is that he acted like he hated it and he hated me, but when he got out he looked me up and wanted to get together. I turned him down.

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>Be me.
>Be 9? 10?
>Be young.
>Live in small town, a lot of children.
>Family of black people move in down the road.
>In an attempt to be funny we start telling jokes.
>Tell the run nigga nigga chainsaw joke.
>They laugh awkwardly and leave.
>Feel good, think I befriended them.
>Mfw they move out the next day.

>>731168951
probably wanted to trap you.

Convinced a not-so-mentally-stable girl that I had cursed her. If she didn't drink at least one type of bodily fluids from me, she would die - and this had to be done daily.
Eventually I had to move away so I freed her from the "curse", now I live in the opposite side of the country.

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>>731161758
Once I was OP and promised pic's of my sister for trips.
I lied.
I did not deliver.

>>731168867
Why would you vote left? Do you like the scum that comes from the third world?

>>731168709
makes me laugh too, dw

>>731168530
lol youre a fag bitch anon, cant even do anything to the girl directly. i hope you get gangraped

>>731164907
Why were you homeschooled? Is your mom some kind of narcissistic religious hick?

>>731163320
you did the right thing... geese come from hell

>>731166992
Wtf did you do to her you sick fuck

>be me, 8th grade, school trip
>had to stay overnight at a shitty hotel, 5 of us having to share a room
>pretty autistic fatherless beta kid, had his mom come with him on the trip
>we all cringed at how they acted when together - wore the same clothes (like twin, duplicate clothes), holding hands while walking together etc.
>decided the kid was a disgrace
>bought chocolate pudding
>painted his face while he slept
>early morning, his mom knocked on our door
>she wanted to tell him which clothes to wear, so that they could dress the same
>sees his face
>thinks he's actually dirty and gets visibly mad
>ohshit.jpg
>mfw when he gets bitch slapped by his mom in front of everyone, his mom being the only one who ever spoke to him
>he found out it was me who did it
>he stops talking to me
>fast forward 4 years later, find out my girlfriend's been the one he's had a crush on for the past year
>teach her how to properly reject him
>mfw his mum starts texting my gf, trying to lure her over
>we both laugh our asses off

1. Me and friend stole leftover raffle ticket books from junior high school orchestra instructor office cabinet. Went door to door selling them for weeks. Made thousands of dollars.

2. Me = little violin virtuoso. Grandfather was poor factory worker. He saved money for years to buy me a beautiful high quality 1800's violin as a surprise gift. I dropped out of orchestra when I got to high school because it wasn't cool anymore. 3 years later sold violin to crooked music store owner for $25 for drug money.

So much shame, but decades later I have turned out ok.

>>731169102
You filthy nigger.
kys

>>731167732
Lulz

>>731169102
This is pretty much the worst while being real that i have read in here.

>>731169161
is there a person on earth that believes this? i could have written a more convincing lie at 8

I shot a mother dog in the lung and kept shooting at it till it found its hiding spot. When they dragged its corpse out the puppies followed. I kinda wish I could feed those pups their own mother and raise them but nobody let me near them and they got put down by the vet.

>>731169025
fair nuff

>>731161758
ITT: Normalfags and moralfags

>>731167764
Wait that's his girlfriend but he's gay? Dafuq

>>731166992
Continue?

>>731163121
>bullied in college
>hurt enough to do this
>doesnt just kill himself instead

its all a lie.

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> Be me
> YOU ALL KNOW WHAT I DID JA?

>Be me
>Regularly buy fucked up drugs and research chemicals off darknet
>Buy lab mice from petstore
>Force feed/ inject mice with drugs to see how they act
>Some of them die
>The ones that live get released into the wild

I'm thinking about expanding my studies to cats and dogs but I'll need to build a bigger cage for them.

>>731169761
Huh?

>>731169881
that's actually pretty interesting if the whole point isn't just torture because "kek xd", if it's actually research it's pretty damn interesting

>>731161758
Used to touch and sniff and kiss my little cousins pussy well she was sleeping. Still think about her all the time. She was maybe ten and I wasn't THAT much older.

>>731167625
its not rape if you want it

>>731169926
You said you sent a pic of you Cumming on his girlfriend's face.

>>731170286
No you idiot, I was catfishing him, The girl who has cum on her face is the girl who's pics i was using to pretend to be

>>731169089
trap me? I wasn't and still am not fem looking at all, if either of us were going to trap it would have been him

>>731164010
and then she told to granny!

>>731163320
Thought this was "Evil Things" not awesome things everyone should do!

Signed,
-Mallard Ducks.

>>731168149
He dated it

>>731170486
He meant trap as in set you up not that gay shit

>>731170076
I suppose you could call it research. I'm not with any sort of institution or anything and if the results in the mice don't look too scary sometimes I do the drugs too.

>be me
>was 16 year old
>got a girlfriend who was a total bitch but was hot so who gives a fuck
>she tells me she was being sexually harassed by her boss
>grabbed her ass and shit
>comforts her and then we fucked because why not
>she cheats on me a week later
>thisbitch.jpg
>evil plan starts brewing
>goes to her boss and tells him that she is gonna tell someone about sexual harassment
>he freaks the fuck out
>I say shhhhhh it okay just fire her and it'll be over with
>he fires her next day

I got a bitch fired because she was sexually harassed, I don't feel a thing

>>731164774
No other son to carry on the name is my guess.

>>731162686
It's 2017 if they can vote and have their own jobs they should be expected to protect themselves

>>731166597
Dindu?

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>>731166592
Buddy

>>731164486
my mate and his one friend took on 6 niggers and won.

I don't know if i have ever done something evil, but thoughts are a whole other thing.

i split my friend up with his girlfriend at my work because i wanted to fuck his girlfriend . and i did.

>>731167500
You are probably my cousin and I am going to kill you Raymond.

>>731170486
>>731170614
lolol OFC that's what I meant..
A 13yo trappin out a 16yo just sounds odd.

>be like 7or 8 maybe
>Setting fires in the woods near my house with my older brother
>Older brother is 2 years older than I
>Boyswillbeboys.jpg
>2 neighborhood spics come see what were doing
>Spics are cousins, like 3 years older than my older brother
>Try and lecture us about how we shouldn't be setting fires
>Pffft me and older brother up the ante
>Uncle's old Ford is sitting collecting weeds in our backyard
>Checkthisout.mp3
>Gather small pile of leaves and twigs and assemble them in the middle seat of truck
>Ignite
>Standing there watching for maybe a minute when next door neighbor yells "YOU LITTLE SHITS SETTIN FIYAS???!!!"
>Oh shit, bail
>Me and brother and the brothers spic all split up
>Me and brother meet up Inna woods and discuss plan
>We hear firetrucks and smell smoke and can see smoke just pouring into the sky
>Older brother duffs me right in the eyeball
>Hides his pocket knife under some leaves
>Both run home crying, met by mom and firefighters
>Tell them super spic Bros beat me up and held older brother at knife point
>They made us do it
>Weweresoscaredmom.webm
>We get to go out to McDonald's after truck is extinguished and firemen leave
>Never seen spic Bros again

>>731171628
Yeah....that makes more sense, I've been on 4chan too long, when I read trap, that's the first thing that comes to mind now.

>>731170645
>a boss taking employment advice from an autistic 16 year old b-tard, cause he doesn't know better himself.

more shit that never happened lol

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>>731170515

>>731171635
>The brother's spic
kek

not the worst i've done but i piss in my housemates fancy shampoo every time i shower

>>731166992
Nasty fuck
Sicko
People like you should be hung

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>Be me
>14, antisocial beta male
>Go to gamestop with grandma waiting in the car outside
>Go to turn in some old games u had
>Not 18 so no case, no membership so no credit
>Wait for cashier to leave and just leave the games on the counter
>leave
>They will be confused and wonder why I just left
That was years ago and have never went back to that place. I also have a similar story about a gym.

>>731161758
I bump Andy Sixx's threads

>>731162686
How about you just respect them as another living thing

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>Be me
>11
>Has a great friend, pretty much a crush on him after a week of knowing each other
>We grow closer and closer together, we go to same school, same classes, live close to each other, spend all free time together
>After about 2 months of being friends I can't imagine having a day without him
>One day friends mum buys kittens
>Friend is in love with them, spend all the time with kittens after school and on free days, invites me over but I say no, I want to hang around with him only not with his stupid gay kittens
>After a month or so of him spending all his free time with kittens, I realize that something needs to be done or the kittens will permanently steal my crush from me
>One day, after school, I get home and go over to friend's entrance of his backyard, I see the kittens on the back-porch sleeping
>I quietly sneak in as I know that backyard entrance is always open, I go over to the kittens and take them without being noticed
>Take the kittens with me to my house, stuff them in a small bag and quickly make my way down to the nearby forest just behind the neighborhood
>I take the kittens out of the bag in the forest and I look for the biggest log I can possibly pick up while being just over 11
> I find the perfect one, heavy as hell but enough for me to pick up
> I get the log, go over to kittens, they just sit the making annoying kitten noises but they don't really run off or anything
> I look at them with disgust and raise the log above my head
>shitisheavy.jpg
>And then with the last bit of strength I have I smash the log right onto the sitting kittens crushing them to death instantly
>Roll the log off the crushed and spazzing kittens, pick them up by the tails, and chuck them down a small river that goes through the forest and I make my way back home
>Next day in school friend runs up to me and tells me that his kittens went missing
>2 weeks later everything back to normal with best friend crush and me being together all the time
>Worth ded kittens

>>731161758
Considered voting for Drumpf

Got in touch with high school booty call, fucked her sister, told her it was the worst I've done and get her to love me, fuck booty call few times, start blaming her for everything, make her feel inadequate get her to break off with me, pretend for months to want her back, her friends start stalking my throw away social media, make her look like terrible person I still love who abuses men and lies to children, told all the secrets she said about her friends behind her back while befriending her mother. Mfw I broke that bitch and her mom loves me because her daughters a lying drug addicted sociopath who abuses men and lies to children

>>731163121
Lol a bully in college
Ill take things that never happened for 400 alex

>>731169761
You a little slow huh?

>be me 16 yrs stupid edgy metalhead
>little drug dealer
>shitty drugs for stupid people
>hot blonde schoolmate
>wants drugs
>getlaid.jpg
>drugged her and fucked her right in the pussy
>passed out
>scared as fuck
>got her out and let her in the street
>hospital and shit, bitch told headmaster about drugs
>I denied
>noevidencesuckmycock
>got away with it and bitch got expelled

>>731166384

If it's possible for you to care less, that means you still care. It's not fucking hard, is it?

>>731172670
This is why I keep gay beta males at a distance.
My childhood best friend of like 15 years, We were basically born together, turned out to be a fag. Sounds heartless, but that little cunt confessed years later he used to grope me in my sleep. Fuck the gays.

>7 years old
>kid poured chocolate milk on me
>sticky hair rest of day
>im pissed
>kid goes down biggest slide in playground
>pushed off side
>broke his arm
>nobody knew it was me
>gg

>>731169826
Kill yourself

>>731161758
I was fucking my 13 friend and vice versa.
God damnit I'm 24 not and everytime I see him I don't know how to act.

I stole the public library card out of the locker of some guy in my gym class. At the time I felt, he was stupid enough to not lock his locker so I justified it to myself. Anyway, went to multiple public libraries over the next 24 hours and checked out tons of DVD and stuff. Ditched the card after 24 hours for safety. I never thought about it again... until like 6 months later, like following school year he was in another one of my classes and was complaining about how he was working at the Library shelving books part-time on top of his existing part-time job trying to work off thousands of dollars worth of fines related to his stolen library card. He was still not even sure when/where he lost it and I felt fucking terrible.

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>>731172326
Most evil thing I ALMOST did was save that Pepe without giving you one in return.

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>>731173335
Its been 11 years, we're still best friends, I'm gay and he's Bi but we've never done it together, he says that he's more of a one-time thing guy and if he did it with me he wouldn't feel right when hanging out with me more.

>Got bitch addicted to heroin so I could fuck her
>Be 17 and horny
>Hot bitch I want to fuck but she's not into me
>We smoke weed together so I bought heroin and put it in her bowl and say "smoke this"
It begins.gif
>Tell her what it is and convince her it's not too addictive if you smoke it
>Starts asking for more but I say I can't just give it away and she buys when she gets money but she doesn't work
>Eventually wants me to front it
>NOPE
>Well I need it anon
>Well if you fuck me you can have some
"K"
Goes on for months.
Eventually she went to rehab
>No regrets

I set someones car on fire just for fun

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>>731163121
>College bully
>No password
>Didn't tell the police
>Snuck into a classroom in session
0/10

>>731173334
He never stated anywhere he didn't care, did he?
You keep insinuating because that's how the typical phrase would be worded, smart ass.

>>731173573
Keep making excuses, but as far as I'm concerned you guys aren't real friends.

>>731173678

>piss on nigger
>"I care about niggers"

Makes perfect sense

>>731162686
Guaranteed replies

>>731161758
how old was you sister

>>731171138
If the last digit of your post was a 7 I'd be very satisfied in a carnal way

>>731161758
Something I am willing to admit is I once pissed in a large yellow coloured alco-pop bottle. My reasoning at the time was that if you were somebody who drank alco-pops you deserved to drink piss.

Nothing crazy happened afterwards, but my friend ended up drinking some of it and then telling me later that somebody pissed into a bottle of alcohol.

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>>731169102
You monster

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>>731165862
kek'd disapprovingly

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>>731166460

>>731161758
Something I am willing to admit is I once pissed in a large yellow coloured alco-pop bottle. My reasoning at the time was that if you were somebody who drank alco-pops you deserved to drink piss.

Nothing crazy happened afterwards, but my friend ended up drinking some and then telling me later that somebody pissed into a bottle of alcohol.

>>731173859
Just by remembering means you care about it a little. Doesn't mean he cares about the nigger, but honestly, he probably could care less about the sequence of events. Now begone, peasant.

>>731169298
Yeah, pretty much. Not really the stereotypical kind though. She's the overprotective type who bases all her opinions on facebook memes. She thinks vaccines are too dangerous, but she believes in bigfoot and ancient aliens.

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>>731166157
demon !

>>731166992
Continue anon

>>731165538
Always wondered what the correct phrase was but I have heard you could use both just different phrasing.

>>731174178

lol retard

>>731167357
My best friend also did that as a kid kek

>Be me 10
>Parents have hatched chicks
>Alone with baby bird
>Proceed to put them in a coffee can full of corn
>Once they're in i shake the container
>And hold it up side down
Later some died parent never did know why

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>be me 7-10 years old
>be in preschool
>friend keeps sticking finger in door hinge and teacher keeps telling him not to
>I'm holding door
>"listen to the teacher you dumb nigger"
>close large door while his finger is in door hinge
>smiles with content
>I can still hear his screams today
Pic related, this kind of door

>>731161758
>Be 16 y/o
>Throwing a party with some friends
>Fairly drunk
>Had to refill fridge with beer
>Grab a crate from garage
>See hammer and get epiphany
>Open up half of the bottles and spill like 1/3th of them
>Top them of with my piss
>Slam the bottle caps back on with hammer
>Put them in fridge
>People drank my piss elixir and didn't even notice

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>be a 32 year old psychologist on internship
>be married for 10 years with 4 kids
>have a nervous breakdown over dissertation and stress
>start drinking all the time and going to strip clubs
>start meeting up with strippers and start dating one behind wife's back
>start going to work extra early to "get work done" and instead start fucking stripper girlfriend in the ass and everywhere else before work
>Lie to stripper that I'm gonna get a divorce
>Lie to wife that I'm not fucking strippers and drinking
>wife knows something is up and starts trying to spice things up
>fuck stripper in the ass then go home to wife wanting to go to the movies
>wife gives me road head to spice things up and accidentally goes ass to mouth with the dirty stripper I've been fucking
>true fucking story

>>731165609
O

>>731161758

Kill yourself OP

>>731162686

He doesn't even need to treat them better, just not molesting family members would be good

>>731174778
how are you married to 4 kids

>>731165862
Not alright

>>731174537
>be me 7-10 years old
>be in preschool

>>731172670
sick fuck

>work at cemetery part time at night while in college
>gangbanger in viewing room
>his homeis litter all over
>gange banger is wearing sun glasses flannel with only top botton on
>I come back in room at night
>take off his glass and spit in his dead eyes

>9th grade
>sitting in cafeteria for some after school football meeting or something
>at my table with /b/ros just waiting, had my head down b/c tired af
>so-so friend comes up behind me and pours salt packet in my hair
>had a bad history of people pouring sand etc on my hair and having grains of shit in my scalp
>pissed 9/10
>after scraping and washing the shit out of my head, /b/ro at table tells me he has a giant bag full of that magic sand shit, stuff that turns solid when wet
>this is my chance
>faggy friend that poured salt in my hair is back at his table, unsuspecting
>walk up behind him with giant ziploc bag full of pink magic sand
>pour it all on him
>he gets mad and tries to punch me, block punch, push him back to table, nothing else
>he tries to wash it out but being magic sand just turns into solid goopy mess in his hair, impossible to remove
>has to get a buzzcut

>>731175104
I don't remember the exact age, I remember it was preschool. This was 15-16 years ago. Your sense of time changes when you aren't in middle school you stupid nigger

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>dumb bitch at work always causing problems
>leaves office but leaves her soda on desk
>put the straw of her soda in my ass and put it back
>watch her drink it over the next hour
>fucking smiles all day

>>731161758
started fucking this girl in college when we were drunk and finally got her to send me nudes and shared those nudes with all my friends...each one of us had a different one printed out and hung on the walls of our house

>>731174885
Well Timmy, the man sperfluges a flont of garfle nooget into a womaens callifragilicious. 9 months later they eat poptarts and shit out a bahbay.

>>731163121
You got beat up for standing up to a bully.... in college.

ok.

>>731175426
You were the one who was 10 years old in preschool stupidfag

I post extremely explicit pictures of my ex wife on an almost daily basis here. I also doxx her from time to time - when i am not banned for doing it.

I always come back.

I always repost.

...and I keep meeting anons who know or have fucked the whore. So I guess I am not so evil after all.

>>731171556
Nope i've always covered my tracks and every one likes me you not my fam bitch

>Devils night
>/b/ with friend.
>dark cloudy night.
>we're chucking pumpkins at cars from within trees growing next to overpass.
>Nobody can see us.
>push friend down hill
>He gets hit by a car
>I run
>he dies
Authorities figured out there were two people, but thought he merely fell down.

Wasn't the only evil thing I did either.

>>731175426
so 15-16 years ago you were 7-10 years old

>>731161758
Growing up I always had a really fucked up attitude towards sex. It probably happened because I started way too young. When I was 7, my best friend was a girl a year older than me that lived next door. Looking back, she was probably being molested, because she knew WAY too much about sex for an 8 year old. But she was pretty fucked in the head too, because she would fuck me pretty regularly.

She'd tell me she wanted to play house. After a bit she told me she wanted to show me something secret that mommies and daddies do together. It started with just getting naked together, then progressed to fondling, oral, and eventually to full-on intercourse. We even did anal a couple times. I could get hard and orgasm at that age, even though no cum would come out. I thought it was just about the best thing ever.

A year or so later we moved away and I never saw her again. But I was hooked on sex at that point, so I'd try to find kids in my new neighborhood that were into it. I got a couple of them to play doctor and that sort of thing, but none of them were up for nearly as much as my old friend had been.

When I was about 12, there was this little girl in the neighborhood that I got obsessed with. She had shitty parents. Not abusive or anything, just neglectful. Pretty sure her dad was an alcoholic. She also didn't have many other friends, so when I started hanging out with her she loved it. She followed me around constantly and pretty much worshiped the ground I walked on since I was the only person who paid any attention to her.

After a couple months of that, I started pushing her to do sexual stuff. Little things at first, like pulling her shirt up to let me see, or letting me kiss her. She went along with those okay. Kind of reluctant, but not too much. But over the next month or so I kept pushing it, and she kept getting more and more uncomfortable.

Continued on next post...

>>731171831
>if you're somebody's boss you can't possibly be an incompetent idiot
somebody has never had a job

>>731176198

Eventually, I asked her to suck my dick and she refused. No amount of convincing would get her to do it. So I told her that was fine, but if she didn't do it, I wouldn't be her friend anymore. I told her to go home and never come back. She left, crying, and I figured I had lost my chance.

But the next day she came back. I asked if she was going to suck it now. She said "Please don't make me, I don't want to, but you're my only friend". I told her again, she either had to suck my dick or I wouldn't be her friend.

So she did it. She cried the entire time, but she did it. And to be honest, the crying made it even hotter to me.

I didn't make her do anything for awhile after that. Maybe a week or so. I realized I could get in serious trouble and was terrified she'd tell her parents. But she didn't. Or, possibly, she did and they didn't believe her or didn't care. Either way, I didn't get in any trouble, so I figured I was good to go.

Now that I knew emotional blackmail worked, I started using it all the time to get her to do more and more stuff. We quickly progressed from blowjobs to full-on sex. She was so fucking tight it felt amazing, much better than it had when I was fucking my friend originally. And her obvious reluctance and pain got me off.

After a couple months of this I think she was pretty much broken to it. She didn't protest any more. She just did whatever I asked her to do without complaint. I did everything my twisted little brain could think up with this girl. I fucked her in the ass, I made her deep throat me, I'd fuck her in all three holes in one session, even made her do ass to mouth. I'd stick stuff I found around the house up her pussy and ass. I'd slap her around, choke her, bite her nipples. I even got my dog to fuck her a couple times.

I did that shit to her for 3 years until she finally moved away. No idea what happened to her after that, but that was over 15 years ago and it never came back on me.

>>731163701
>Tfw walking dead character

>>731165609
then all of France clapped

>26
Rented a bicycle in Atacama desert, Chile to ride a bit around countryside and mountains
Pretty rough area, rose for maybe 2 hours, had to cross three (shallow) rivers
Met some French couple on the way
I hate French people
They didnt even say hello or acknowledged my presence in any way
Really steep mountain, leading to some old historic passage or church or whatever
I bicycle for 20 minutes uphill
Finally give up and rest a bit
Thinking about heading back as the rental guy told me that it's going to be a storm afternoon
Suddenly Frenchy couple walks uphill
They must have left their bicycles down as there were no other people around
Wait for them to pass
Ride down
See their bicycles
one's chain has broken so they are fucked
I take the good bicycle and throw it down the canyon
Ride downhill back to village super fast as the clouds were already gathering
Literally 2 minutes after I returned a bicycle it started to rain + thunderstorm
The French couple probably had to walk all the way in rain as there was no good hiding spots on the way


I never told anyone

>>731161758
>be 9
>older brother talked me into blowing him
>do it for a couple minutes and then stop
>tell him I dont like it and wont do it
>later he repeatedly beats me, go to hospital for stitches
I hated him for 45 years but I don't feel anything now

>>731176050
Pics?

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>>731166771
The way you greentext makes me want to go on a killing spree. It only takes one ">" faggot.

>>731165538
Contrary to popular belief, it's actually "I could care less."

>>731174621
>one thirth

>>731176147
>some random night
>/b/ with friend - the one I told you about
>we plotting some shit in an alleyway
>I watch as some old bitch lets her cat out
>cat eventually comes over to us.
>I pick up the cat, pet it a while
>wring its neck.
>friend geeks out.
>I proceed to break all its legs
>friend is laughing like a hyena
>I tear the fur out around it's pussy, show it to him.
>He's dying laughing.
>I take the cat over to the lady's house,
>shove the cat cunt first onto her cars hood ornament
>Leave it there for her to find the next day.
>I read about the "horrible crime" in a local paper 2 days later.

>>731163320
>>731165877

>Canadian geese
"The Canada goose (Branta canadensis) is a large wild goose species with a black head and neck, white patches on the face, and a brown body. Native to arctic and temperate regions of North America, its migration occasionally reaches northern Europe. It has been introduced to the United Kingdom, New Zealand, Argentina, Chile, and the Falkland Islands.[2] Like most geese, the Canada goose is primarily herbivorous and normally migratory; it tends to be found on or close to fresh water."

I hope you, your children and your entire fucking families have a slow, painful, gory death and I also hope it all ends up here in a rekt thread so I can fap to it, you sacks of nigger cum.

>>731176492
they are in some other threads right now.

sorry, not confessing to a felony and providing evidence.

>>731176989
I fucking hate Geese, useless shits, that shit everywhere, ruin the environment, and kill other native birds.

They're nigger birds, just like you.

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>>731177085

>>731167500
found the trailer park dirtbag who thinks the world revolves around him.

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>>731167500
What the actual fuck dude...
>Why aren't you telling us a story about I want details I wanna hear how you raped your sister now!

>>731176758
>random party
>I'm bored watching a friend fuck his gf.
>he tosses his used condom in the trash.
>I pull it out, go into another room
>random girl wasted, passed out on the bed.
>I squeeze the contents of the condom into her pussy.
>Leave and forget about it.

>month later, school's abuzz about girl getting raped
>she's preggers now. Proof of rape.
>I leave anonymous note at her locker
>telling her who the daddy is.
>Police are called, charges filed, paternity test proves his guilt
>he goes to prison, registered sex offender, child support, parents disappoint.
I still see him around every once in a while. He drifts from job to job, apartment to apartment. Everyone thinks he's a rapist.

>2-3 months ago
>surf the deepweb
>mainly to find the exams I will be doing
>"theres anything on the deeepweb, if you search for it"
>well, then I found one thing that isnt there.
>whatever
>surf these hacking forums
>find out about SS7 protocol
>"it's vulnerable, anon. you just need to program this code to spy on any calls going on, if you have the connection"
I will keep it short , most of it wont be understood by any of you anyway.
>basically me scriptfagging
>find out the ip of institute that makes exams
>google for "filetype:PDF" with some more added behind it, just in that region.
tourns out theres a document that is really fishy, but encrypted.
>how to get the key
>SS7 protocoll
>tell some other dudes on the forum about the document
>1 week later they found out the key because they told about it in a telephone call
>be me
>today
>probably passed exam

>>731173573

Kill yourself

>>731164852
>be 6
>swimming class
>everyone was wearing arm floaters
>holding on to the edge of the pool and making a line to te steps ladder to get out.
>turn around, and for no reason made a hole on both of her floaters and pushed her out of the edge.
>got out of the pool without even looking back

>weeks later in the class room, my teacher was scolding another kid. And she brings up the incident of the girl because he watched her drowning and he just stood there and laughed at her.

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>>731169881
Please don't do that {>~<}

>>731177915
She was 8 i was 11 and i took her to the basement parents did shit monitoring told her how adults play she was shy but accepted we where playing and i put an ice cube in her ass and fingered her then stopped for that day. i think i herd shit and dipped out before getting caught always was cautious

>>731177943
>walking a field behind some apartment complex.
>See a little girl playing in a sandbox all alone.
>I go over and play with her - she's about 4-5yo
>Real easy to get information out of her
>mommy's sleeping, daddy's at work
>So I molest her right there in the sand.
>I poke her pussy with a stick. She starts to scream
>I grab her mouth. She pulls the stick out
>There's blood. She runs towards the building
> hightail it out of there.
>never go back that way again.
Nobody ever comes for me.

>>731177591
Well i was from the sticks not red neck though more modern, but it was my lack of importance and fact i felt like nothing i did mattered that lead me to fuck shit up. my life was pretty fucked before i decided to even the playing field.

>>731161758
There are few to tell. I'm pretty boring though.

>18
>Frustrated as shit living with Mom, but on the verge of moving out
>Graduation day
>Blackout for a week
>Come to and freak the fuck out.
>Check phone
>"Who the fuck are all these new people"
>Look out window
>Where the fuck is my car.jpg
>Call most recent mystery number
>"Oh yeah man, we met at the party right after we all got out, remember?"
>what in the actual fuck
>"You weren't doing anything crazy. You did slam down 2 rolls and a half a handle, but that's nothing new."
>Nothing important was gained. Make another call to these strangers in my phone.
>"Hey, who is this?"
>"Anna, your GIRLFRIEND"
>this actually isn't real
>explain the best I can while trying to sidestep pissing her off any further
>she gets it somehow and explains my week to me.
>Tells me how we got together and actually a pretty cute story.
>My dumb ass claims to remember and sweet talk her a bit because hey I don't argue with pussy (which bites me in the ass hard a few months later)
>Hang up and check messages after
>My mom claims someone has been breaking into the apartment
>Both of us were apparently locked out while someone was in our house and gotten out. The bar lock was on the door during those times so said person was actually living our place while we were gone.
>absolute no recollection of anything of this. Not even a subtle fear which is odd
>scroll down to see her saying she's sleeping with a gun under her pillow.
cont...

>>731163121
In college it's not called bullying, it's called assault.

>>731178634
>Come across a junkyard.
>start playing around the junk at night
>Get destructive.
>One night, they leave their tow truck out
>I have fun bashing the fuck out of it half the night.
>Next morning, I ride my bicycle by there
>see them talking to the police
>I just keep on riding, nothing to see here.

>>731165323
Admit it dude. Thats racist own it. Thats the fucking point of these threads.
> Be me in Highschool
>See older woman with a note pad
>Admin password
>Change the grades for my entire class.
>Stole a few laptops.

>>731168375
Should of slashed her tires or her friends or some shit.

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Who here was a devilish child?
>be me
>like 4 or 5
>mom takes my pacifier away because I'm getting too old for one
>puts it in the cabinet where I can't reach
>fuckthatshit.jpg
>grandparents come that day to watch me while my mother goes out
>pretend that I lost my pacifier and can't find it
>grandparents find and return pacifier to me
>mom comes home to find me suckling on my pacifier without a fuck to give

took a girl out to a nice seafood dinner and never called her back.

While growing up nothing interesting happened to me :( Atleast i know someone is either a good sotry teller or had something interesting in their past.

>>731176420
>>731176420
WTF man

>>731161758
>Be me 15
>go to a school filled with autistic kids
>sat in math class bored as fuck
>tard that is obsessed with ponies has pony plushy
>won't function without said plushy

>tard guard leaves the room
>decided to fuck with him because funny
>Take pony plushy when they aren't looking
>hide it in tard guard's purse

>kid looses shit when she comes back
>Full on abusing the tardguard
>kid gets kicked out of maths class
>had to get a private tutor to pass
>still didn't pass

Heheh

>>731178938
>Driving around with this dud
>he's a little unhinged since high school
>His gf just broke up with her.
>I keep driving by her house
>ever time, he starts talking about her again
>I know he's getting obsessed with her
>So I keep putting little ideas in his head
>about other guys I've seen her looking at, talking to, been alone with.
>He's getting all pissed off at her
>Obsession+anger == great things to come.
6 days later I hear that he had broken into her home, beat her up and tried to rape her. Her brother came home just in time and cold cocked him. He went to jail, got out, and went right back to her house. This time the cops were tipped off and was waiting for him.
>some people are just too easy.

>>731178794
Please continue

>>731170645
nick?

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>>731178794
>She's so freaked out, she's actually ending the lease a month early
>Still that weird feeling I should be more freaked out by all this.
>Figure out my car is actually hidden in the complex since the whole thing snakes into itself from my friend Taylor who I also met blacked out.
>Decide to go kick it with him and my friend Scott since we all apparently met together.
>Smoke, play CoD, and talk shit to one another.
>Scott asks me if we're finally moved out
>Figured he meant generally and not about that whole situation, but tell him how we're about to break lease
>"Yo, good shit, it worked!"
>what?
>Tells me my dumbass got thrown out after said party because I came home rolling my balls off and I couldn't stop telling my mom how great she was.
>Takes my house key.
>Thanks MDMA.
>Scott tells me my dumbass stayed over at his place and made a plan
>Over the course of the week, I had been climbing into the apartment during the work hours and locking the door from the inside and making shit look messy.
>This is no easy task mind you; I lived on the third floor and had to climb up other peoples' balconies to get to the back door which I always left unlocked to go smoke or shoot my BB gun.
>Apparently never caught and no cameras
>gated neighborhoods are so trusting
>Thanks Scott lmao
>ended up getting my wish
>mom's so scared, she ended up fronting the first couple month's rent on my place and moves in with her boyfriend in another county.

i have a few others, too

>>731168318
>tfw this is a few miles from my house
>tfw someones hand is in the pond at my local park

>>731179890
I like that one, so i'll share lesser story
>riding 4 wheelers with friend
>stop at his relatives house while they are unloading car they just got back from garage
>he goes inside with them
>i hop on his 4wheeler and undo breaks then let it slide into their car
>he has to pay 250 for repairs i said i tried to stop it
>he feels dumb for forgetting and thanks me

>>731161758
>Also be edgemaster 13 yo
>started Hitler cult with a group of about 15 friends
>decided I was born to finish what he started
>kyloren.jpg
>I would tell friends to fight different niggers, gays, etc that I felt didn't belong in my new society
>went on for about three months
>rotated the person that would fight so that no single person would get suspended too many times

>wrote everything down on a piece of paper that I kept in my pocket at all times
>had everyone's names, reasoning for Hitler worship, and a swastika on it
>put it on the bathroom counter while taking a shower during a weekend visit to my mom's house
>former army ranger stepdad finds it because I forgot to grab it after the shower
>he lost his shit and threatened to kill me right in front of my mom
>he showed the paper to my mom and she said I was going to hell
>dad comes and picks me up an hour later
>we have a discussion, mom and stepdad want to send me to jail
>dad doesn't care, even says that he understands my reasoning
>culminates in a meeting between my parent's and the parents of everyone else in the group
>we're all separated from each other for two months and we have to pick up trash on our respective streets and other random bullshit

>eventually start hanging out again but we don't speak of everything that happened
>in college now, to this day most of my friend's parents still refer to me as the Fuhrer
>volunteered with a refugee agency one summer
>a lot of refugees said that I resembled Hitler
>would mostly smile and laugh while they discussed the resemblance
>if they only knew kek

>>731166992
continue

>>731161758
tried to shoot a cat with my bow but missed,tried to shoot a pigeon with my bow,damn the fucker reacted fast.

>>731180379
Do you have an autistic Hitler stache bc that's probably why

This is just fucked up

>>731180706
No shit ass clown it's an evil thread

>>731163320
>I'm not a very evil person honestly

Yes you are you cunt. Kill yourself

>be me, kind of dating some cute nerd-type girl, just because
>having grown up with my heroin addict uncle, my moral system is pretty corrupt
>she is majorly interested in pokemon cards
>has a pretty big collection
>insists that I attend a pokemon card pre-release with her, just a few days ago
>some autistic beta male has brought his entire collection, it includes several shining, goldstars. etc.
>I'm sitting there like "my gf would love to own all of that"
>he leaves to the bathroom, suddenly they start handing out the pre-release packets. Everyone in the room is distracted, including my gf. Nowismychance.jpg
>I steal a skyridge charizard, a few shining cards that my gf was missing, and a few others that looked cool
>somehow nobody noticed
>he returns, his collections appears to be exactly as he left it. He starts to open his new cards, he gets super pumped about pulling a few gx cards or whatever.
>hours later, I still had the cards in my pocket. I'm extremely bored by this point. That's when he finally decided to check his collection, he immediately notices.
>starts going crazy, starts searching the room frantically
>my gf is there with him, she is also searching. I realise she wouldn't be okay with me just stealing his cards.
>I sit there, and watch him eventually leave.. "chasing" after some spanish-type guys who the theft was momentarily pinned on. They had been around earlier, and had left early
>on the way home with my gf. We are both walking, she's talking about how terrible it would be to have that happen
>I'm considering my options here.
1. I could attempt to sell the cards online in my local town, and probably get caught
2. I could try and explain that I stole them for her, and hope she is corrupted by this
3. I could buy a snack on the way through town, and then bin the cards as I discard of the wrapper

I went with 3., tfw you just binned 700 euro worth of nerd-junk

>>731178052
absolute madman

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>>731172670
>worth ded kittens
nigga wut?

Ok my turn
> 10 years
> Friends come by
> ask me to go to local kiosk
> noMoney,png
> Bro had birthday yesterday got money and shit
> say friends to wait outside
> steal bros money
> buy candy and shit
> bro never found out

>>731180592
I look super Austrian and have thin brown hair. The middle part of my stache is way thicker than the sides, so if I grow any facial hair it does look like I have a Hitler stache. I didn't realize that it looked that way until it was pointed out, so now I shave everyday.

>>731181291
Pics? (;

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>Be me
>Be 15
>Have Jew best friend
>Pic related, its him
>He gets girlfriend
>He talks about her constantly

>Be on an army cadet weekend.
>Be real pissed at him because he "forgot" to put my name in for NCO tests
>Get a summons from Chief Instructor, she asks why I didn't apply. Tells me its too late but I can try next year
>Be really really pissed

>wait till annual camp.
>put in billet with him and 5 others
>hear him talking to his GF over the phone
>overhear them have an argument about something
>have convo with him about how she came out to him as Bi, and wants him to be as well
>he says he's not into it
>Next day I see him hitting on some girl over dinner
>fucker needs to get punished
>In showers spot him looking at mine and other people's junks
>Last straw

>leak fact that he will talk to his girlfriend later that night to some other friends in the billet
>he for some reason decided to do it in front of all of us
>in his pajamas talking to her in the corner looking out of the window
>I look at the others, they look at me, I nod
>we jump him and yank his arms behind his back
>He is weak as fuck so can't resist
>He gets a boner. Its fucking tiny and you can see it though the thin trousers
>All start laughing
>I just stare straight at his face as he starts to cry

>notice the phone is still in a call. I turn on speaker so she can hear

>Guys in the room next door hear us and come over
>start laughing too. About 20 people now

>NCO comes in, stares at us for a good 30 seconds
>doesn't shout, just tells us to let him go and go to bed
>he leaves once we are in bed, as he goes out I swear I see him smirking (No one likes this kid, he's a know it all faggot)
>"Friend" still crying
>Phone is off now but pretty sure she heard everything

>We pretend we are fucking his GF making horse noises and squeals and shit for about an hour. Eventually fall asleep, later hear him crying

TLDR: Emasculated a guy over his tiny dick in front of 20 people and his GF