These girls are headed your way >QUICK >give 'em

Which one of you doesn't have a dick?

Uh.. er.. uhh... mm..
*stares at own feet, stammers, blushes and then vomits*

What am I doing on the beach? I'm not a social creature!

i dont have to say anything i'l just flex a cep'
and they will start sucking my dick

your mother will die if you don't post dat ass on my lap

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>>730825712
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

Walk up to the one in the middle right side and say.........Baby if you were a booger I'd pick you first!

>>730825712
I wouldn't. I would yank the fuckin tanga off the 3rd one from the left. Ive done this several times to random women in pismo manhattan beach zuma and I almost got caught by police in zuma. But I have 4 bottoms sharked by yours truly...

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>>730825712

Klaatu barada nikto

>>730826220
jesus...

>>730825712
*tips fedora*
M'Ladies

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>>730826324

>>730826367
Its good right? 60% of the time it works everytime

"Not to brag ladies but I can fit my whole dick in my mouth"

>>730825712
nice vagina

>>730825712
Hey you girls have instagram? I have about a million followers. Wanna suck my dick and I'll tag you.

>>730826053
Pussy

I'd just flex my dick

WHO WANTS TO FUCK MY ASS! NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER

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>saunters out from the waves with a quick flick of any residual water on fedora
>clears throat
ahem
>moonwalks forward across the sand, writing calculus on the way over
Pardon me, maidens. But it seems that the quartet of you are traversing this fine beach without a chaperone...
>puts hand on hip and finger on chin whimsically
May I offer my services in this regard for only 3 gold pieces? Should your charisma be 16 or over we could always negotiate
>twitches eyebrows a la Milhouse's dad
Here's my D20...roll for it!
>winks thrice
>pulls tabletop board out of board shorts
>sits on sand seductively
>gracefully await players 2, 3 ,4 and 5 to join party

>>730826555
trips commands me to

>>730825712
The one in the middle looks the best

>turns 360 degrees and walks away

Tell them I just sucked a log of warm shit straight from Andy Sixx's asshole.

Watch as they all start French kissing me.

>>730825712
Hey ladies!
...Kitchen's the other way.

I can lick my eyebrows.

>>730825712
> "Hello ladies, I have money in the bank and ADHD.. Feel like burning cash and having fun?"

>>730826692
You'd be walking towards them still you fucking dweeb, that's just a full circle

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>>730826873
> the newest of fags.

>>730826873
how are circles even real faggot?

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>>730826873

>>730825712

You bitches like spaghetti?

Damn girl, you got a myspace

Hey, ladies. I, erm, well to be honest Im a loser. Ive kinda been a quiet, shy, weird, awkward person my whole life. Possibly creepy :l But maybe there's a girl at there who... knows. Who knows. I dont know. If you understand, than we should chill. I like funny stuff, self deprecation, nature, art, music, stories, drugs, and pondering.

>>730826873
Found summer fag whapdeepfoddooodoo!

>>730825712
>Implying I'd have to say anything.

Just do what I usally do. I'd just give them a smile and they'd see my jawline. They'd then all beg to suck my dick.

>>730826873

He meant increasing his core temperature fag. Lrn2Grill

>>730827726
>not having a jaw AND dimples

shit is like cheat codes for pussy

Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you?

>>730827569
Holy kek they'd be thinking what a fucking creep u are. What kind of girl would want to be with you?

Approach them with three of your best bros, hold up four fingers on one hand

>Hey girls, 4 of you, 4 fingers, fucking sit on them!

>>730827872

I'm guessing the one with hands and feet bound in the trunk of the car.

Mommy is walking with me and she will do the talking if need be.

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>>730825712
You ever fuck a goat by the pale moon light?

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>>730827569
Oh no

>>730827819
Dimples on 'men' are beta as fuck. It's a sign of youth (a lil boy).

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>>730825712

>>730825712
>ladies
>tips fedora
>carry on

>>730827963
Fucking kek are u the guy I replied too or another anon?

Hi ladies, I will pay $250 to each one if you shit on my chest

Get outta the way bitch

>>730827977
Holy shit you still go to the beach with your mom?

"Excuse me, do you have any friends that are T H I C C AS FUCK NIGGA?"

>>730828099
Sure you would.

>>730825712
>squeeze massive fart<

>>730825712
Hello ladies, wanna fuck?

>>730825712
My sister says I'm get in bed.

>>730825712
> excuse me could you show me the way to the beach?

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>>730828383

>>730828181
Obviously. Who else would drive me?

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I'm full of semen, would you like to be full of semen too?

>>730825712
>Best part of wearing your swimsuit is that no one knows when you go to the bathroom!

Then I'd squat and drop a runny deuce in my billabong board shorts.

Why would I give my best coke away

>>730825712
>paints face black
>promises has big nigger dick
>makes you whitebois mad
>puts black seed in all 4 while you guys have to listen

>>730825712
See them, try my absolute hardest not to make eye contact.

If eye contact happens open mouth to say something but nothing comes out.

Why am i like this.

What the fuck am I doing at the beach?

> y-y-y-you too

>>730825712
>*blocks their path*

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>>730828582
Women don't like it when you shit in their pussies fam.

>>730826601
Make a charisma check.

HEIL HITLER!!!!
SIEG FÜR DIE HERRENRASSE
>judenschweine raus

>>730828542
Okay how old are you?

>>730828765
fucking kek'd hard

>>730825712
It's not the fucking 90s. Wear something else you worthless whores

>>730825712
Hello, I get my pickup lines from the internet, wanna do coke?

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>>730825712
YOU HAVE TO EAT THEM ALL

Which one of you hooers would like to sit on my penis

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o shit waddup

>>730829400
Nice reference, Dubs God.

>>730825712
Ya'll know where the gay bar is?

>>730825712
Do you like kids? cuz i sure do!

>>730825712
Do you like chickens?
>Uh.. Yeah, I guess...
Then suck my cock it's fowl

Stinson cheerleader effect - they're not actually that hot.

>>730830038
holy shit - you're right

>>730828915
23

>>730825712
Die white cis scum.

>>730830790
And where the fuck is your drivers license? Does your mom take you everywhere whenever u go out?

>>730825712
Hey, want to be sexually pleased like you've never felt before? Come with me & I'll take you all to Jamal's house where his homies will show you all a good time. I'll just stay and watch.

>>730831096
Never got it and yea usually

>>730831399
Wow. Does she buy your clothes for you too?

>>730831456
No shit. She knows what looks good on me.

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>>730825712
. . .

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>>730825712
*slick hair back*

SUP LADIES! H-how are... y-you... wanna go-

*trip in sand*
*spaghetti falls out*

>>730831675
Holy kek you're such a loser and so embarrassing. Please be b8 all along.

I need to see their asses first, no lie.

Hey ladies my dick is 4 inches and I cum in a minute and a half get naked

>>730826873
Do people try and bait this shit? Can't help but wonder if people do it on purpose

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>>730825712
GET IN THE FUCKING VAN!!!!

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>>730825712
Does this rag smell funny to you?

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>>730825712

>going for 4 at a time

Retard move, read and learn.

>approach target in car park when they're approaching their car
>say you are thinking of buying the exact same model for your wife
>your wife likes golf so you want to make sure the boot/trunk is big enough to fit the clubs into
>can you show me how big the boot/trunk is please?

The second she opens it sucker punch her, take her keys, pile her into the boot/trunk then drive off into the sunset.

>mfw people use pick up lines when my methods so much more effective.

>>730825712

Are you the ones that made the ocean smell like fish?

>>730828765
Nice

"Look at my handsome dog. Want to soak in my hot tub tonight?"

>>730825712
>give 'em your best line
Women are inferior

>>730825712
m'lady
*tips fedora*

>>730833486
Holy fucking kek

Let me be your Titanic and sink in to you

>>730825712
"You want some coke? I give you my best line!"

I'm a graduate of the Bill Cosby sex offender acadamy. What I mean to say is, do you wanna grab a drink?

>>730825712
Hey laddies the word of the day is legs...
How about you come back to mine and spread the word

>>730828765
still giggling

>>730835740
>laddies

Fucking faggot.

>>730825712
- Hey baby. Wanna come home with me and suck cock and eat popcorn?

- Uh, you dont like popcorn?!

>>730825712

I got money. Let's go.

oh baby your pusy look so good, can i eat? :^)

>>730828582
ABSOLUTELY BTFO BY
>>730828765

>>730825712
You're All fat

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>>730826873

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>>730825712
>yell "DACO DUESDAY! DACO DUESDAY!" and rape them like a downy motherfucker

It puts the lotion in the basket.