sup /b/. drunk. ITT you post shit and I'll vocaroo it in

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Literally fucking end your life

>>729210154
thanks anon me too

http://vocaroo.com/i/s016gOb7Xmw6

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Please, anon. Will love you forever.

Thank you Andy Sixx for allowing me the opportunity to suck a log of shit out of your asshole and use the log of shit as a dildo to fuck my pussy with and have the bacteria from the shit fertilize my egg cells and impregnate me with a retarded human shit baby and then give birth to that retarded human shit baby and suck on its retarded human shit baby balls and fat fucking throbbing retarded human shit baby fucking cock until it can't take it anymore and then cums out a giant fucking load of retarded human shit baby cum all over my mouth and then spit that cum out and use it as lubricant to finger my asshole with.

>>729210482
that's real good anon

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It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out. If I don't update this again please send help.

Please mother forgive me for running around in me underoos shouting:

Pad kid poured curd pulled cod. Pad kid poured curd pulled cod. Pad kid poured curd pulled cod. Pad kid poured curd pulled cod. Pad kid poured curd pulled cod. Pad kid poured curd pulled cod. Pad kid poured curd pulled cod. Pad kid poured curd pulled cod.

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>>729210855
Bump for anon's glorious voice

I too am drunk. The chorus of Funs' "We Are Young"

Fuck you it's fun I think

>>729210855
enjoy you fucking degenerate

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0igbK89jfvD

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target.

>>729211042
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1TI9HpTkib0

what is my fucking life

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>>729211266
Thank you based OP

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"The joke is that I really am Patrick Warburton. I love to get shit faced and browse /b/."

"Fuck off commie faggot kill yourself you fucking nigger cunt bitch cuck nigger"

Anything by Queen

Get the fuck out of here, you are new at being drunk you fucking faggot

>>729211298
thank god finally some oc in this thread

http://vocaroo.com/i/s131gN2IiKjY

"i would stuff a hose with 1 metre of barbed wire inside deep down inside my penis hole, pull the hose out leaving the wire, leave it there for 100 days pulling it out 1cm at a time via my arsehole, eat my blood and shit off the wire, shit it out, eat the shit, vomit that up, eat that vomit, shit it out again, mix it in a blender with brocolli and the cheesy yeast from oprah winfrey's pussy with a scabby rash while she was on her period, pour it down my left sinus, drink whatever came out my right sinus, shit that out, smear it on my cock and masturbate to gay midget pterodactyl porn at the same time as i rubbed it on my face, just to order a full cream milk latte with 1 sugar from the same starbucks that a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of her ugliest fattest friend did"

Pretty please OP

>>729211633

closer to the truth than you'd think

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0vTWyaGyODd

>>729211633
Do the Asian sensations in the pic do porn?

Also, sauce?

>>729211941

You uncultivable bitch. After you're done apologizing to your gynecologist for turning his arms into snakes, I demand an apology of my own.

>>729211941
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0vTWyaGyODd
Thanks OP love you in Venture Bros.

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I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

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>>729209415
Please OP
Hey Peter. Youre probably wondering why I'm in your house. I want you to take me, Peter. I want you to penetrate me with your fat cock. Make me your little legless bitch. Bonnie or Lois never have to find out. When you finish you can cum on the wheels to my wheelchair so that when I go down your driveway I lose control and go out into the street where I will be hit by a car. I'll be paralyzed from the neck down and will be helpless to stop you from doing anything to me. Please daddy, make my wishes come true. YEEEAAAAAAAAH!!!!

>>729212102
Afraid I don't know, found this ages ago. Would love to find more but no luck so far.

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"It's not rape if we're both crying"

>>729212237
itt: talk in a deep voice and breath heavily in unnecessary places

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1pz3wnD31Ir

>>729212370
shoutouts to the neighbors for not texting me asking me what the fuck's going on (yet)

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1mBBxFSAmE0

Oh right, the poison. The poison for Kusco. The poison chosen specifically for Kusco. Kusco's poison.

>>729211851
DO IT YOU FUCKING FAGGOT

Jesus Christ, Mary mother of Satan's left nipple, it's like my hand is made entirely out of urethras and each and every one is having a red-hot catheter put in and ripped out five times every second. My very being is on fire. My only desire left is for Death himself to bless me with sweet relief

>>729211941
How do I make this my ringtone?

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>>729213277
You are a fucking god
>Im actually starting to think your the real Patrick Warburton

>>729213754
>download as mp3 on vocaroo

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Not so fast Morty, you heard your mom. We've got adventures to go on Morty. Just you and me. And sometimes your sister and sometimes your mom but never your dad. You wanna know why Morty? Because he crossed me. Oh it gets darker Morty. Welcome to the darkest year of our adventures. First thing that's different, no more dad Morty. He threatened to turn me in to the government. So I made him and the government go away. I've replaced them both as the de facto patriarch of your family and your universe. Your mom wouldn't have accepted me if I came home without you and your sister, so now you know the real reason I rescued you. I just took over the family Morty and if you tell your mom or sister I said any of this, I'll deny it. And they'll take my side because I'm a hero Morty. And now you're gonna go and do whatever I say Morty. Forever. And I'll go out and I'll find some more of that Mulan Szeschuan Teriyaki dipping sauce Morty. Because that's what this is all about Morty. That's my one-arm man. I'm not driven by avenging my dead family Morty. That was fake. I'm driven by finding that Mcnugget sauce. I want that Mulan Mcnugget sauce Morty. That's my series arc Morty. If it takes nine seasons. I want my Mcnugget dipping sauce Szeschuan sauce Morty. That's what's going to take us all the way to the end Morty. Season nine more seasons Morty. Nine more seasons until I get that dipping Szeschuan sauce. For ninety-seven more years Morty. I want that Mcnugget sauce Morty.

>>729213402
at least get the quote right you fucking pleb

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0i9bmo0nF5X

>>729214018
Yeah he even knows you got the quote wrong, the evidence is piling up. This is really Patrick Warburton.

>>729214018
I knew i fucked something up

>>729209415
I'm tired of smelling nigger trees in my niggering nig nigga house my niggy.

>>729213996
bet you can't hear the exact moment where I accidentally derailed this quote and subsequently stopped giving a fuck

http://vocaroo.com/i/s12HFjeeVLu6

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>>729209415
it's not gay if we're we're the same gender

I want you to go to the other voaroo thread and say the following: Fuck off OP. This is my board and I am the undisputed king. >>729205159

>>729215447
You legend

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http://vocaroo.com/i/s0ClrKGKklDJ
>>729205159 →

>>729215724
>>729216627

y'all niggas need patrick
>>729216624

>>729216627
>>729216724

I want to thank both of you.

>>729210482
I hear the resemblance.

>>729211266
That was really actually really very really quite really

>>729216724
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1F2RknkzXGR

>>729211524
Good

>>729213277
FUCKING KEK

>>729213277
Somebody needs to animate the accompanying R34 for this

>>729213560
oops missed you

http://vocaroo.com/i/s18KGM09eNkF

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Red Pepper.....is....THE....BEST PEPPER!

Sayit Kindo slaw please until you reach "BEST PEPPER"

>>729218653
gran autismo 3: a-spectrum

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1KbNYjYh4mN

>>729219132
>tfw when my copy of Gran Turismo 3 for ps2 was right next to me when looking at this post

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>>729213277
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s1mBBxFSAmE0
kek good shit op

Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got
I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block.

>>729220467
fuck it we going all night

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0KQM4i70eYr

Gimme gimme chicken tendies, Be they crispy or from Wendys. Spend my hard-earned good-boy points, on Kid's Meal ball pit burger joints. Mummy lifts me to the car, To find me tendies near and far. Enjoy my tasty tendie treats, in comfy big boy booster seats. McDonald's, Hardee's, Popeye's, Cane's, But of my tendies none remains. She tries to make me take a nappy, But sleeping doesn't make me happy. Tendies are the only food, That puts me in the napping mood. I'll scream and shout and make a fuss, I'll scratch, I'll bite, I'll even cuss! Tendies are my heart's desire, Fueled by raging, hungry fire. Mummy sobs and wails and cries, But tears aren't tendies, nugs or fries. My good-boy points were fairly earned, To buy the tendies that I've yearned. But there's no tendies on my plate! Did mummy think that I'd just ate? "TENDIES TENDIES GET THEM NOW, YOU FAT, UNGRATEFUL, SLUGGISH SOW!" I screech while hurling into her eyes, My foul-smell bowel-dwelling diaper surprise. For she who is un-pooped on is she who remembers: Never forget my chicken tenders.

>>729221636
fuck need some Cane's now
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1RsTOTye4W2

>>729209415
Good morning USA,

I've got a feeling that it's gonna be a wonderful day,

The sun in the sky has a smile on his face,

And he's shining a salute to the American race,

Oh boy it's swell to say, Good morning USA!

Have you heard of the high elves?
*bite noise*
BLERGH
hnnnnnhhhhh...

>>729209415
Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

"Hey Peter. I just paid $40 for this? Did I get ripped off?"

This thread needs bump and this op needs a fresh pepe

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>>729213277
i can tell its an impression, with sexual suggestions to emphasis the humor, and i think its from family guy or american dad or some related griffin cartoon but i dont really find it that humorous?
am i doomed, discuss?