Weird Shit You Experienced as a Kid thread >be 11yo me >dad

>protected all my childhood
>nothing weird happened really

>>729132475
Thanks for the bump I guess

I was taken to a dildo selling party, nothing like having your mom and close relatives chatting around dildos and vibrators .

Grandpa got mugged by a junkie in an alley after he took me to a pancake restaurant.

He had to go to the hospital, I was like 6. Traumatized the shit outta me.

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>>729133076
Oh god, this brings back horrible memories.

I was a kid about 10 and my fat aunt in law or some shit threw one of those parties.

The only memories I have is old fat women testing out vibrators on the outside of their clothes....god kill me

>>729132217
>Weird Shit You Experienced as a Kid thread
No... I hate talking about Uncle Erick

>>729134270
You know it's a fucked situation with "Eric" is spelled with "Erick"

>>729134315
You know it's a fucked situation when uncle Erick is from Germany

>>729133076
>>729133852
That's fucking horrible, god damn my childhood was a breeze. Not even sarcastic.

>6 years old to 15
>Dad would just beat the shit out of me randomly for no reason at least 4 times a week

>>729134595
Are you by any chance black?

>>729134855
No, I'm blond and ghost white. My dad had blond hair and blue eyes, so basically the furthest from black in 4chan's eyes.

>>729132217
>be 9
>be 1997
>aunt and uncle adopt 11 year old sexual abuse victim
>we get along great
>in her room
>shows me her vagoo
>sucks me
>been fuck buddies since

The thread says weird shit not fucked up shit so quit trying to win the I had a shitty childhood Olympics .

>>729134982
Ah, russian

>>729134987
Nice!

>>729134982
ugric?

>>729135062
Deep south hombre
>>729135045
I'll do what I want, calling off topic is kinda fucking dumb for /b/

>>729135116
Had to google that, and no.

Had to watch an educational video of a naked tard giving birth in health class. I'm guessing the teacher wanted the least hot woman possible. Shit was terrifying and the bitch screamed like a dying animal.

>>729135187
im a cross boarder, i need keks and i got banned from kikebook

>>729135147
he chastens everyone he accepts as his son 12:6 Hebrews

>Be me, about 16-17
>Talk to everyone, no pretense at all
>Bikers, gangbangers, hippies, homeless people
>Always been that way, since a little kid
>Talk to this homeless guy who was planning on sleeping on a kid's playground (where we used to smoke pot and one kid sold butterfly knives)
>He tells me a bunch of shit about
Never let a woman at (points to my chest) this.
>Bunch of shit about how women are the root of all evil, quotes some shit from the bible, some life experience

Never trusted a woman since, and my experience has confirmed him to be right about everything

>>729135187
ugric is just a nice way of saying finnish

>>729135389
no, its a different group reeeeeeeeeeeeeee

>>729135471
think putin

>>729135340
I don't think his violence stemmed from anything of good intent. Pretty sure it was because he was an alcoholic schizophrenic.
>>729135389
Google says otherwise kek
>>729135262
Sounds like one hell of a health class, we just learned stupid shit like how to do CPR, so that we can fail to save someone's life and get sued for breaking their ribs trying to save them.

>>729135373
Another story from a similar time, must have been 15-16
>Be me
>Grieving loss of childhood friend, leukemia
>Feels bad man
>Funeral was last week
>Headmaster (principal) of my school invites me to have coffee and talk in this coffee/bookstore
>Really cool guy, drives me and a few friends to carpool to school every morning, takes me to "Dads and Donuts" because my dad was never available
>At the coffee shop, homeless looking guy approaches me
>Smells like liquor on his breath
Here, you should have this book man
>Um, ok thanks
>Take book
>Later tell my mom about it. She confiscates the book
>I had only read the intro chapter of it, some kind of crime novel about a murder/rape
>Turns out the book is about the violent sodomy and murder of a male child
>Mom tells me to not hang around the headmaster anymore
>Later turns out he was sexually abusing kids, never charged with anything but blackmailed by my mom into leaving the school
>Seen him around sometime later, still coaches youth soccer and hosts bible studies at his house

>>729135547
She was a very thorough teacher but I what I found the most confusing was the fact that the guy was normal and chose to reproduce with a potatoe. Shit is burned in my memory

>>729135916
Gee, why would some guy just fuck anything female that breathes if it lets him?

>Be me
>about 4 at the time
>taking a bath
>decided to put my vagina under the faucet
>feels good man
>my mom walks into the bathroom makes a face then walks away
>I didn't know any better but thought her reaction was weird.
>remember as an adult and cringe

>>729136041
Fucking a potatoe is one thing, but reproducing with it is a poor life choice
>>729135916
Was it even remotely hot? Was he just ugly?

>>729136264
>but reproducing with it is a poor life choice
you pretty much just fuck it without a condom.

>>729136207
she probably did it herself that very morning

Also post tits.

>>729136264
They where both ugly and she had super saggy tits .I wish I could find that freak show again but its never resurfaced.

>>729135373
>>729135914
Homeless are very wise in your town.

>>729136470
Fuck, pretty heavy shit for schoolers.

>>729136406
Can't, my tits fell off in a freak fire-hydrant accident. Sorry

>>729136566
I think the second story the guy was hired by the headmaster to give me the book.
But yeah, I mean they're just people like anyone else, but they probably have some fucked up life experience that makes them wiser or something.
And they choose to live outside the rat race of taxes, owning property, slaving to a job all your life. Something about that seems kind of wise

>>729136207
she just realised why your dad was drinking from the spout all the time

>>729136605
And you don't keep them in a jar?

>>729136605
that would be great material for thread

>>729136774
>I think the second story the guy was hired by the headmaster to give me the book.
wtf why????

>>729136822
>>729136888
>>729136922
dubsb trips dubs in a row noice

>>729132475
And yet you're still here

>>729136924
Why do I think that, or why would he hire him?>
why I think that: He smelled like booze, so he probably paid him with liquor. It was too much of a coincidence that we were gonna be at that bookstore at that time, and too random that a homeless guy just comes up to me and gives me a book
Why would the headmaster do that? I think I was being groomed to be his fuckboi. Maybe he thought reading the book would make me curious about sodomy or something? I have no idea
Honestly I never would have thought of that whole theory, the whole thing came from my mom who read the book. But it turned out to be true, headmaster's wife confessed everything to my mom including how she was jealous that I was getting all Headmaster's attention, and how he fucked one of the neighbor kids, an exchange student from Australia

>>729137298
>why would he hire him?
this one.

Giving you a book on the murder rape of a young boy would make you curious about being sodomized?

>>729134987
You've been cumming inside her for 20 years?
Anyone else or just you?

>>729137452
I have to agree, I don't think the logic of it makes sense at all
I didn't suspect a thing, I didn't think anything was weird about the situation at all
I am making at best a guess as to why he would give me the book, and why it would make my mother so hell-bent on destroying him.
If you think that's not logical, shit I'd have to agree with you

I know you can see me.

>>729137732
sorry if anyone replies I gotta leave for work so I won't be able to reply
I guess thanks for reading I haven't told many people about any of this

>be me
>deep south, 10 years old
>going to some shit magnet school
>preschool to 8th grade, sounds like a great plan
>riding the bus to school cause dirt poor parents
>playing gameboy advance on the way to school like usual
>trying not to get picked on by the middle schoolers like usual
>edgy emo teens in the back are drinking like usual
>Sudden bang, followed by screaming
>turn around as fast as possible, dropping and breaking my fucking gameboy
>my chemical romance's biggest fan opened the safety door in the back, and jumped out on the parkway going 65
>pannedoutgreat.jpg
>bus pulls over instantly after black crackhead bus driver figures out the back door is open
>everyoneis losing their shit crying, police are on the way
>stuck there for 4 hours, but end up not having to go to school for a week
>gameboy screen is cracked, but still playable ( How the fuck did I crack the screen on a gameboy btw? )
>didn't even care that a girl just concrete dived off the bus, just happy I get to play vidya games
>after a week ( long time right? ) go back to school, meet in cafeteria and get the " don't kill yourself talk "

>>729134494
You know its Erik, not Erick?

>be me
>school far so i live there and being home once 2 weeks.
>me and school palls decide to sneak to girls bath house
>windows open, steam coming hard
>stormy and cold outside, hard to spot us
>look inside
>heckyeah.jpg
>2 twins each takes a separate bath
>one has notably bigger tits than the other one
>palls and me stay for around half hour then leave as the twins leave
>Many faps this night in every boys room
>next day the twins in rage, someone said that one of them had bigger tits.

>>729138256
You know it's Eric, not Erik?

>>729138400
anime irl ?

>Walking with dad when I was 5.
>Hear screeching tires and crash.
>Look back see motorcycle under truck.
>Dad makes me hold street sign and goes to see.
>Helps driver to side of road. He colllapses.
>FLAMES
>Yell for my dad
>Dad screams for me to stay
>Dad keeps reaching into flames. Truck driver gets out to help.
>Pull bag of stuff from motorcycle
>Start to walk towards father
>He runs and picks me up.
>1981, small town, before cellphones
>Get home two blocks away
>Dad frantically picks up phone. Hears sirens. Hangs up.
>Picks me up and squeezes me and wails like a banshee.
>Never mentioned again.
>30 years later, at dads funeral, guy stops me and asks if I remember him. Nope.
>He says my dad saved him and tried to save his son.
>Mfw I realize the bag was the guys teenage son.

>>729138463
You know it's Eirik not Eric?

>be 8yr old me
>outside on a warm summer night
>dusk approaching
>having a good time with family in backyard
>sister gets sick
>starts dry heaving
>parents start doing a concern
>sister throws up
>snake comes out of her mouth and lands on the ground
>snake is still alive
>scares the shit out of all of us
>snake hisses and attempts to bite sister but misses
>snake then flees
>we look at each other disbelief

I have no memory of what happened after that for the rest of the night. As a rational adult, I know this situation could not occur. However, it's so vivid and ingrained in my memory that if my parents hadn't explained to me at the time that it was a dream I'd still to this day swear it actually happened.

>>729139002
dis nigga has a dream

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>>729137944
>Sudden bang, followed by screaming

whad habbened

>>729138551
You know it's Eyrieck, not Eirik?

>Be 4 years old
>go into parents bedroom
>walk in on my dad plowing my mom
>thought nothing of it
>now fast forward 16 years
>remember that I walked in on my parents having sex
>mfw

>>729139391
>mfw
>no reaction image

>>729135262
Was that the one where she also shit at the same time

>>729138547
woa

>>729132217
>all of a sudden that shit in my asshole was making me feel aroused
>from that point on I knew I was gay

Ops actual story end

>be me 12 years old
>summer camp with best childhood friend for 2 weeks
>we end up at different chambers( i mean the rooms we slept , not sure about the proper english word)
> lots of fun swimming,soccer and shit like that
>at the camp work psycologist that also works to An orphanage
>my friend ends up at the same chamber with the orphan kids he brought to the camp
>they become friends
>all cool we all play together and have fun
>one day they tell me at nights the psycologists takes them to his room and they all have fun together like video games and candy(including my friend)
>my stupid self gets jealous and thinks that must be very cool
>suddenly my bf starts to cry all the time for no reason while we chill
>this happens all the time
>he says somw shit happend to his dad
>after a soccer match we chill at the stadium seats with the psycologists and he takes picture of us with his camera
>he commends me for my soccer skills and tells me that if i go the next period to the camp he will arange to be in the same chamber with the orphans and my buddy
(Camp was like 2 weeks periods, other kids went the next period for all summer)
>hmmmm ok
>this situation continues untill the end if my period
>didnt manage to go next period
>i had to go to grandparents
>best friend went
>some days later breakimg news on TV
>the psycologist is a fking pedo and has raped many kids throughout the years in that camp
>omfg my best friend
>pedo psychologist goes to prison
>my bf before the summer ends moved to another city near mine
>he never said anything to me so not 100% sure he was a victim, but he was for sure
>23 now and havent seen him since that summer

And that was the story that i almost got raped..damn so close still gives me chills there are even more details drom what i can remember ,but i wrote to much already for one post. Sorry for fail english

>5 years old
>hang out with neighbor who is also 5
>on his front porch pulls down my shorts and says he saw this in a magazine
>sucks my lil wang under a blanket
>pulls down his shorts
>awkwardly forces me to suck his wang
>oh shit his mom sees and angrily points at me stop
>never been able to look at him or his mom the same way

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>>729139138
Poorly explained my bad, she opened the emergency door and it swung and hit the other side of the back of the bus

>>729140329
so
>random emo chick randomly jumps off bus
>everyone freaks out

>be 13 years old
>walking around the school since i give the absence sheets
>see daniella whom was rumored to be a slut
>she's crying and being followed by the principal
>fast forward a week later
>Daniella hasn't been to school since and everyone is worried
>tell them what i saw
>MFW she was expelled for prostitution and I'm the last person she saw in the school

>>729132217
I was almost abducted when I was 8 years old
>parent's didn't believe me

>>729135914

>here lies Leukemia

>RIP

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>11 or 12
>understand the concept of masturbation based on what I learned on tv
>didn't know how to finish
>end up cranking my hog for 10 or 15 minutes and end it by peeing

>>729135280
just go and bait on /pol/
they're a really stupid bunch they are

>be 7
>at cousins house
>hanging out playing
>my cousin walks out of restroom
>asks her little sister to lick her as hole
>she says no
>I eagerly say yes
>she gets on her knees and bends over
>her asshole in my face
>I start licking it.
>She pulls away and asks if I want to swim
>sure, but are you gonna let me do that again?
>we get to the pool
>I try taking her shorts off
>she doesn't wanna do it anymore
>I'm left there wondering what I did wrong

>>729137208
k you got me i was raped (a lot) by the usual suspect (thats uncle for those who haven't had family related rape issues)

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>>729140643

>>729140195
As soon as I read "Chamber" I knew someone was gettin raped

>>729140614
They probably planned it then.

>>729140646
Me too anon, me too.

>>729140830
I dont know the proper word.. Thats why i used chamber.. The camp was like big rooms with bess lined next to each other for each kid.. Like small houses, one big hallway with beds

This happened recently (i'm still young so technically a kid story)
>Get drunk with friends at a party
>Have to walk home alone sinve we live in different cities
>no busses at 3 am and the house is too far
>go into a gas station and ask for a taxi
>old dude offers me a lift
>pass him 10$ for gas
In the car its a straight road to get home
>he suddenly turn away from the indicated route and says he needs to pass to his house to get something
> wait in the car before realizing what's going on
>see a group of youngsters dropping their friend
>tell them i'm scared of the old dude and that i would appreciate an escape
>MFW THE ASSHOLES REFUSE
>old dude returns and starts asking questions like if i'm afraid of him
>lie and say i thought it was my friend
>he drives back to the main street
>stops at a gas station gives me 5 of the 10$
>tells me to buy him a coke
> as soon as i am far enough he drives away at full speed
>tell gas clerk my epic misadventure
>he laughs at me and calls me a cab
> MFW i lost 25$ because i trusted a stranger and almost got kidnapped

>>729141195
I am not criticizing your word choice, I think it was actually very good.

>1993
>be 11 years old
>be depressed because reasons
>pretend to hang self, neighbor sees
>get sent to psych ward at city hospital for 6 months
>nurses weird, always talking about sex
>got taught masturbation in sex ed
>nothing else
>encouraged to masturbate
>one day psychologist enters
>early 20s, female (early SJW)
>makes me draw family
>I did not draw breasts on female family members
>she freaks out, says I have sexual issues
>makes me draw breasts on them
>good job, back to your masturbation room
>stop being sexist, pig
>focus on the breasts
>masturbation becomes my only release
>been sexual deviant ever since
>steady escalation
>am terrible person

TL;DR: Was sad kid because parent passed away, government turned me into a monster.

>>729141250
Yeah i know..i just wanted to explain what i meant cuz not native english speaker and maybe some shit i write dont make sense.

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>Be 10, live in rural California amongst Avocado Trees.
>Neighbor kids tell me about the "witch tunnel" in the middle of the trees on a neighbors property.
>Head out there to see it in daylight. It's a tunnel dug in the earth. We could crawl into it but didn't dare, as it looked creepy as shit and definitely looked like adult size people could be inside. Later, I'd understand this was used by illegals while being smuggled.
>Memorized where it was so I could go back later.
>A year passes, remember that witch tunnel and want to see it again.
>About an hour before dark.
>Hike up to where I remember it is. Looks abandoned now. Partially caved in and spiderwebs over entrance. However,
>Over the years many dogs have been killed or disappeared. Neighbors suspect it is because they bark at the illegals moving through the trees.
>Notice something white in the leaves.
>It is a dog's skull, meat still rotting on the bone.
>Realized it is getting dark, nobody is in the area, and dead quiet.
>ohshitnigga.png
>Run my ass home too shit scared to ever tell anyone about it.
>

>>729141211
Holy shit anon, you just save yourself a good ol rape and possible murder too

>Be me
>Out camping with Boy Scouts
>We are forced to go on an eight mile hike
>Along the way we are approaching a house in the middle of no where
>As we pass a guy comes out
>His dog starts barking
>The guy pulls out a pistol and shoots his dog in the head
>We all start running, assuming we're about to die
>As we run away the guy screams "That's what he gets for never shutting the fuck up!"
>We have one of the leaders who stayed behind come pick us up off the highway and call 911
>My dad went in to talk to the police to make sure it was taken care of
>Police tell him that when they got there the guy was dead of a shotgun wound to the abdomen

>>729141438
Did not know smelly mexicunt border jumpers killed peoples dogs.
Like i needed even more reasons to hate them fucking subhumans.

>>729141195
bedroom lad, it's a bedroom

>>729141617
Saw boy scouts and assumed rape story fair play anon

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>>729141617
Nigga u wot

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>>729141657
Most dogs were killed by the smugglers rather than the illegals. About a 7-8 years later our dog was killed by a pound of beef laced with strychnine somebody dumped over the fence.

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>>729141617
>shoots dog in head
>mfw

>>729139002
Fucking retarded

>>729136207
post tits whore

>>729133076
>>729133852
>americans

>>729136207
Probably shocked her to find out that happened at the young an age. My cousin would do that shit on the arm of the couch or your leg. Whole family avoiding it like the plague

>>729141278
So the nurses gave you a handjob?

>playing at elementary school playground on the weekend with mate and his lil crazy bro
>go up to cool science room window to look at the cool plants/cactus's
>make eye contact with completely naked janitor
>well not completely naked he had socks on
>he freezes. Probably would have shit his pants if he had some on. Then he takes off out of sight
>we start looking through all the windows trying to find him
>see him in another room fully dressed casually mopping the floor
>mates crazy little bro starts going nuts banging on the window yelling shit at the guy
>guy doesn't even acknowledge it cuz he knows he fucked up
Tell the principal on Monday
>have a meeting with principal and couple of dudes in suits
>detectives or child service or internal affairs idk
>let us pick free pens and toys from the school store for exposing the exposed janitor
Fuck yes.
>find out they fired the guy and asked if he wanted help. He refused the help

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Has anyone ever had something like this happen? It happened when I was about 11 and it's been bothering me ever since.

>Sitting in living room with my brother and my dad
>Just reading, absolutely nothing abnormal happening
>Suddenly everything flashes white
>It was like a camera flash, but without the light, everything just suddenly looked like a flat white sheet of paper
>Lasted about 1/4 of a second
>Suddenly ends
>All three of us immediately jump up and start looking around
>We go to the window to look outside
>Our neighbor opens his curtains and sees us looking around
>Does a "What the fuck was that?" motion
>We go outside
>We all experienced the same thing but have no idea what it was

I don't know how to explain it properly. It was like for a split second everything suddenly lost its color and form and everything was just dimensionless. Any help?

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>be me
>be grade school age
>play in backyard, hear giggling
>look over fence and see two gals sneaking into a shed outback of neighbors yard
>they see me and wave me over, motioning to shush
>i do
>one drops pants inside shed, then the other, start shitting
>jfc i can see vagoo, hairy as fuck gross but first time seeing
>they finish up and leave
>stand there like wtf
>take shit and leave

A couple days later the cops showed up and ended up talking to neighbor and my parents. Not sure if it was related or not, didn't get questioned.

>>729142248
Forgot to mention these ladies were in their late teens, early twenties.

>>729136207
You know the rules ...

>>729142204
Glitch in the matrix

>>729142150
Help for being nude In a science room Dafuq

>>729142204
are you sure it wasn't a dream?
do your bro and dad remember it too?

>>729142129

No, just followed their deep state handbook for fucking up young minds.

>>729135373
Virgin detected.
Unless you're just a sexist faggot, then nevermind.

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>2002
>brother and I (8 and 10 respectively) weren't allowed out after 10 pm
>come up with a plan
>take a tape recorder and record ourselves pretending to play a video game
>set Super Smash Bros. Melee to 4 CPUs, 99 stock
>everything's set up so it sounded like we were in our room playing vidya games
>lock our bedroom door, start the recording, climb out the window
>go out, ride bikes for 30 minutes then sneak back in
>turns out we forgot to start the game, it was still on the level select screen
>Ah well, it seemed to work out ok
>go down to the kitchen, mom's sitting at the table drinking coffee
>she pulls us to the side
>"Boys... I heard some noises. You know you can tell me anything, right?"
>" We were just playing a game, mom."
>skip to 2010
>I'm cleaning out my room getting ready to move out
>find the tape recorder
>call my brother into the room to check it out for some giggles
>put in new batteries and play
>"Ugh, jeez." "Ooh that's hard." "How's that feel?"
>grunts and moans mixed in
>mfw it hit me that our mom thought we were fucking

>>729132217
Mr Dyche please stop
We have a match tomorrow
gaffa pls

>be me in 4th grade
>have lockdown after school for some fundraiser shit
>be housed in our science teacher's room
>he's a cool dude and puts on a movie for us
>hell yeah it's bambi
>be sitting next to friend and the autistic kid
>bout half way through the movie hear a faint repetitive slapping sound
>look over and see autist beating his meat to bambi's dead mother
>get up and tell teacher
>teacher calls tard guards
>Next morning autist is found in the bathroom with downsy girl covered in retard cum
>never see him again

It was a thoroughly thought inducing experience

>>729132217
Hey. These aren't weird stories at all! These are times someone touched my dick stories! [spoiler]i was 11 ;_;

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>>729142330
That's basically the only conclusion I've been able to come to. My brother says it's either that, aliens, or ball lightning.

>>729142370
Yeah. Me, my brother, my dad, my neighbor and his wife all remember it. My neighbor said his dog went fucking nuts when it happened too. So it wasn't even just people. It just really messes with me because it makes it hard for me to believe that what I'm seeing is real. I saw it all glitch.

>>729142465
Wtf kek'd ultra hard

>>729142724
>I saw it all glitch.
maybe /x/ can help you :^)

nah honestly most bizarre things that happen to me are the product of my imagination...
but that thing you experienced, I have never

>>729132217
>dad is in hospital w/ his 6th heart attack

How the hell does it even get that far?

A few instances of scary palpitations and vague arm pain was enough to get me to stop smoking and become a strict vegetarian overnight, I can't imagine having five heart attacks and being like "I better not stop being a fatass, what is one order of french fries going to do?"

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>be 9-10
>family big in motorcross
>go to the races one weekend
>everything is good
>having a fun time
>had to go the bathroom
>only things that were in the area were porter potties
>go in to leak
>get sudden horny feel
>i finish pissing but too horny to leave
>i look around and see this black tube
>climb up and pull my pants half down
>start humping black tube
>the door swings open
>eye to eye contact with the outside world
>mfw i got caught
>mfw staring contest with 100lbs skiny pale dude.

>>729142693
If that's the case, had a sword fight with my 8 year old friend. Didn't turn gay.

>>729134855
Black? He didn't say that his father wasn't around to beat him.

>>729143114
Did you cum?

>about 12 years old
>visiting deadbeat mom who lives in the shittiest part of the city
>mom ignores me and lets me wander around everywhere
>i was really obsessed with freezing my toys for some reason
>anyway
>12 y/o kid wandering around at night in a city
>pass by some alley and a dude comes out of it
>can hear him following me
>don't know what to do, afraid to turn around
>being a dumbass 12 y/o, end up turning around and very loudly asking dude if I can help him
>dude looks kind of put off, starts walking away
>I avoided being raped by being a loud obnoxious 12 year old

>>729132217

>be me 7 yo
>at Thanksgiving dinner river party with lame fam
>decide to take a walk up river
>hear screams in the distance
curiositykilledthe7yo.exe
>go check it out
>much closer to screams, pass through some shrubbery and see fam's dire wolf monster dogs x4 walking towards me
>they walk right by like I don't exist, blood everywhere, screms nearby turn to weird moans, decide to investigate further
>pass more shrubbery to riverside and see 3 gigantic dismembered pigs (prolly 400 lbs ea when assembled correctly) guts everywhere, they're still alive.... I can see exposed lungs convulsing, blood covered heads gasping for air
>ran back to party, cops showed up within the hour for some reason, rest is fuzzy

That's pretty much when I lost all empathy towards animals, I considered them just flesh constructs after that happened.

>>729143149
I got tossed off by a close mate when we were 11 who was a girl but she was so andro tomboy that i never told our mates because i thought they wiuld call me gay for leeting her touch my dick, ah to be a young idiot again...

Well not a kiddo story but last summer I experienced a sort of disassociation from the rest of the world
>be me sleeping at a friend's place
>wake up and do nothing for a few hours
>sit in her bed watching yt
>suddenly everything starts feeling weird
>even to the touch
>if I touch something it feels like my hand could just go through it
>my vision is clear but everything still looks weird
>this continues for a couple of hours
>feel like I'm in a dream but it's too realistic

I don't know exactly how to explain it but that's my first out of this world experience

>>729142204
Yep, had this before and searched through the internet to find info on this. Apparently this shit is somewhat related to a lightning in a storm but makes absolutely no sound and is really fucking bright. Doesnt even have to be stormy for this shit to happen. Its basically a fucking high current discharging through the air.

>>729140700
Fuck you bitch!

>>729143362
HEY! THIS IS JUST THE PLOT TO PERSONA 4!

>>729136605
Tits or gtfo whore

>>729132217
I was walking with parents after a movie and this crackhead came out of no where and shot my parents. Now I'm a emo fag that love anything that has wings so I can fly away from this nightmare.

>>729143362
>>729142204
Forgot to reply to you bro. You're not alone

While at day camp when I was 12, our tribe practiced fapping to an old Playboy.
>didn't get a merrit badge for it

>>729143362
did you touch her? i would've

>>729136207

I remember showing off my 3-4 year old boner to my mother and aunt in the bathtub and brag that I could move it up and down. They died laughing.

Just one of those things that's going to pop up in my mind whenever I do anything worthy of respect in my life: "There are people who've seen me jiggling my 2-3 inch boner up and down in the tub".

>>729143549
Nah, we had tried that shit but we were better off being friends

>>729135262
Lmao

>>729143528
Are you batman?

>>729143528
>Wings
>Bat has wings

Batman soundtrack starts*

>>729142204
NO FUCKING WAY THAT HAPPEN'D TO ME! i think our dimension exploded and we got put into alternate versions of ourselves, weird theory, but still WTF!

>>729142465
>"Ugh, jeez." "Ooh that's hard." "How's that feel?"
sooo where did that come from?

>>729141000
For your trips:
>be like 10
>jackin off furiously, but no cum
>urinate in condom after orgasming

>>729137860
im high as fuck and that freaked me the fuck out

>>729133852
You were just an inherent shit lord at that age, because you're a male. They're proud beutifiul womyn who understand feminism

>>729142465
put this on vidya

>my crush:"I love you"
>me:"lol"
>...

>>729141000
>>729140646

I don't understand... I was fapping my erect peen to orgasm before i even had pubes... But cum never shot out at all and i never peed?

I can't remember the first time i did cum though, but i do remember shorty after gettig my first hand job and worrying about the new feature freaking the girl out.

>>729138547
Your dad sounds like a good guy anon. I hope I'd have the bravery to do that if I ever had to.

/b/ me 15yo.
Wearing tight white gym shorts cause it was the 80s.
Mother sticks them in the washer with a red towel. They come out pink.
mfw, I have to wear tight pink gym shorts to gym class for 2 weeks before we can go buy replacement.
Got hit on by every faggot in the school. I outed every fucking one of them.
Goddammit I was raging at the world.

>>729142204
>Me and bro walking road middle of nowhere
>Goes from one side of town to the other
>About 30 minute walk with nothing manmade
>No trees, no buildings, no sidewalks, nothing
>Halfway across we both witness bright ass blue flash
>thefuck.jpg
>Time skipped ahead nearly an hour after the flash
>Absolutely bonkers

It's like one second it was 2:23am, blue flash for about half a second, then it was somewhere near 3:30am. Wasn't lightning, no clouds to be seen for miles, just the bright ass moon and stars as far as you could see in the sky.

We think it was aliens or a glitch in the matrix, lightning spooks me now unless I can hear the thunder after a strike, and this was 8 or 9 years ago.

>>729140646
I'm laughing like a madman for some reason Milhouse

>>729141278
this sounds like you misremembering and projecting your own issues onto your memories.

>>729140830
For real kek

>>729140438
Uhhhh what?

>>729139218
You know is Æërhyígck not Eyrieck?

>>729139543
I don't remember I was to busy looking at the giant gaping tard vagina

>Be me
>Be Black
>Be playing some basket ball
>Try to shoot
>Misses and bounces and hits a gang of white people
>ohshit.jpeg
>One comes towards me holding a knife
>Runs back home
>Tells Mom
>Mom says "Your staying with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air"

>>729132217
>be 10 years old with my little brother
>be at store to buy baseball cards
>see 13 year old retard
>watch him whip out his dick and start pissing on the floor while staring into space

>>729138547
damn.

>>729132217
>be 14 yo
>in hospital for surgery
>male nurse really wants to give me medicine via suppository
>repeatedly denied
>he offers to show how it works
>say no, he starts getting angry
>closes the door


>won't continue

>>729140329
I think you explained it alright
>>729140410
Well yeah if the bus was moving and she killed herself

>be me at 10 years old
>be at a game store in a shitty part of town
>be one of the three people in the store including the owner
>some homeless dude walks in
>see he is high
>see he is drunk as fuck
>he sits down at the table I'm sitting at
>starts yelling about demons
>says he needs money
>game store owner is military veteran
>tells him to get out
>homeless dude tries to fight him
>owner grabs his arm, twists it behind his back faster than he can move and picks him up off the ground by the back of his shirt
>homeless dude starts cursing the shit out of him
>homeless dude is literally thrown from the store and scrapes against the sidewalk.
>still friends with owner, 8 years later.

>>729134595
>>for no reason

sure.

>>729147809
lol

>>729141386
Maybe you mean cabins?

>be me at 11 years old
>be walking though the park
>grass everywhere
>I have no shoes
>like a normal kid
>see like 13 black high schoolers
>just keep walking
>one of them sees I have no shoes
>says 'YO WHAT THE FUCK NIGGA WHERE ARE YO SHOES?!"
>I say 'umm, I don't need shoes if I'm just walking on grass.'
>Black girl next to him says: "fukin white people, man. Fuck."
>wonder why it was such a big fuking deal that I had no shoes.

>>729139391
>mfw no image

>>729141617
tb.h your dad probably told you he was dead so you didn't get nightmares

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>be me, 9 and in 4th/5th grade
>was friends with a kid named Danny
>initially very normal outwardly
>he was not normal
>was convinced of a few things:
>he had several personalities/beings inside his head
>his father was a demon that was trying to kill him
>mythological creatures/cryptid animals were real and he could see them
>would "switch between personalities" fairly often at school
>sometimes would punch me a bit if he was in a specific one
>one of them was very infantile, one was solemn and mean, another was goofy

I was at that halfway point as a kid where you're impressionable but also pretty skeptical, so I just went with it, but didn't actually buy into it. Which, in retrospect, is probably why I have so many ridiculous memories. Anyways,

>would point out a cryptid he thought he saw, i.e. fuckin mothman or some shit
>I would just nod and go along with it
>this continues into 6th grade
>he moves somewhere else at the end of the school year
>mfw I stop and think about how stupid the previous 3 years were
>mfw I learned about mental illness with a live example

>>729150203
Actually, I might have been 10 or 11. Age and grade correlation eludes me.

bumping for weird shit

>>729148159
Pretty sure he meant rape dungeon.

>>729141195
frenchfag detected

>>729141211
>>tell them i'm scared of the old dude and that i would appreciate an escape
why didnt you just leave the car and walk?

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>>729140830
>As soon as I read "Chamber" I knew someone was gettin raped

its amazing to me how after more than 10 years ppl still randomly say shit on /b/ that makes me lol fucking hard

>>729134855
black kids always get beat, usually by their grandmothers

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>>729136605

>>729141211
>>MFW THE ASSHOLES REFUSE

why didnt you just walk with them anyway....

still thats fucked up, people today are garbage

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>be 7
>at cousin's house (he was like 17)
>his parents aren't home
>he's watching a cartoon
>''ooh cartoon''
>get close to him
>some clown swearing and shit
>''uhm..''
>clown takes a kid to his van
>rapes him
>for some reason kid turns into a mime
>kids mother shows up concerned about him
>mime kid kills mother
>''wtf'' + blank expression
>cousin turns around
>''suck my dick''
>''no''
>...

>>729138256
>>729138463
>>729138551
>>729139218
>>729145798
holy shit i'm fucking dying

>>729144491
weird, im not being all /x/ but this one happened to me

>me and my friend go drive on this country route to smoke a blunt
>light the blunt and smoke a few hits
>we both have a sensation of "coming to" and we both mention it to each other simultaneously
>blunt is out in the ash tray, wasn't smoked
>we drove like 30 miles but could not account for the time, didn't have any recollection of driving that far, just didn't make any sense at all

>>729150203
>>729150307
it's okay, we know you made the story up. multiple personality disorder doesn't exist fyi.

>be me, about 6
>wake up in the middle of the night, parents aren't home so I'm scared.
>walk to sister's room
>hear what I think is crying
>open door and ask where's mom
>she's moaning and on the phone with some guy.
>lay by her and go to sleep

I didn't think anything of it but when I think of it, it's weird she kept doing it.

>>729143203
How do I upvote this?

>>729150451
this

>>729132217
> be in hospital
> very underweight for my age
> go to the bathroom see fat black orderly
> fat orderly starts sucking me off in the stall
> kid runs in and sees us
> spaghetti everywhere

>>729134987
DONT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!!!!!! DONT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!!!!!! DONT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!!!!!! DONT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!!!!!! DONT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!!!!!! DONT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!!!!!! DONT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!!!!!!

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>>729153225
> be me
> big black man
> fried chicken and purple drank nigga
> Qt3.14 white boi in hospital with me
> he's a gay like me
> we go to bathroom to get it on
> kid walks in
> OHSHITNIGGA.wav
> MFW we forgot the lock
> MFW he walks out
> MFW the dick was the bomb

>>729153474
>be me
>bathroom stall
>two faggots walk in
>dont bother locking the door
>one starts sucking the other one off
>kid walks in
>opens the door
>everybody do the dinosaur

>>729138547
why would he keep his son in a bag?

>>729154021
fuckin facepalm anon.

>>729154007

Good shit man.

>>729154081
Wow, you actually fell for that? He was obviously trying to bait retards like you.

>>729151327
Can that actually fit in a person?

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>be 2 yo
>watching late night tom and jerry reruns on the tv on mute at like 2 in the morning
>for some reason jerry hits tom with a hammer and i drop my diaper and start fucking wiggling my finger inside my tiny todger
>get about as horny as a 2 year old could get
>walk into the kitchen, drop my diaper and take a giant shit on the floor
>continue to stick my finger inside my little todger until a piss all over the poop on the floor
>dog comes along and starts eating the poop
>dog climbs on top of me
>starts humping
>mom wakes up
>sees her dog humping her son while eating shit
>I say
>"Mom, I love Jerry, don't take Jerry away from me" (Jerry was the name of the dog)
>she walks out front door
>steals my dad's car
>never returns
mfw I realise this is still the same shit I do now , 24 years later.
mfw I realise this is why my family is so broken

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>>729140830
Fucking kek

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>>729140643
Lost

>>729154081
idiot

>>729154876
I feel like theres a joke here but i dont get it :/

>>729155085
is this the part where i call you a newfag?

>>729140643
+10

>>729132217
>be me
>hate public toilets
>use one for the first time
>out of paper
>tell next kid who walks in to give me paper
>stands on toilet and stares at me
>hands me one sheet
>wait until he leaves
>wipe ass on his coat sleeve in the hallway

>>729137944
>my chemical romance's biggest fan opened the safety door in the back, and jumped out on the parkway going 65

Fucking lol

>>729143425
>>729142204
Okay /b/ros first hand experience,

>was raining outside
>was about 7-9 years old
> take umbrella with me and walk outside my house and onto the sidewalk
>literally say to myself that "im not afraid of lightning"
>pop umbrella, walk 8 feet down the side walk
>everything goes white, im talking fucking everything
>cant see my hands/umbrella/ road/ sidewalk/houses, nothing but pure white
>sight begins to return, like a dissolve, cant see hands and arms
>everything comes back
>say to myself "what the fu...
>BOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!! Mother fucker
>jump six feet
>sprint to front door
>limp wristedly hit handle
>dont go outside durning lightning storms anymore
> my face when lightning keep striking closer and closer to me ever since
> in order 150ft
> 12 feet
>3 inches (video proof) only thing that kept me from getting hit by lightning was a porch screen

>>729143592
Best post so far. I can identify

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>>729155717
apologize, MFW

>>729143238
>ey walk right by like I don't exist, blood everywhere, screms nearby turn to weird moans, decide to investigate further
>>pass more shrubbery to riverside and see 3 gigantic dismembered pigs (prolly 400 lbs ea when assembled correctly) guts everywhere, they're still alive.... I can see exposed lungs convulsing, blood covered heads gasping for air
>>ran back to party, cops showed up within the hour for some reason, rest is fuzzy
arent we all the same thing?

>>729155085
>never seen the BackSpace image.

>>729143592
thats sort of hot anon.

>>729152316
say that to gerald

>>729141657
muslims are worse tbh

>>729155085
FUCKING FACEPALM
>>729154876
THIS, IDIOT

>>729139391
I'm 31 and I remember *vividly* same thing around same age. I got waken up by moaning and got concerned as to a clueless 4 year old this sounds like suffering... so I peeked in. I even remember the legs in the air and everything.

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>>729143203
It's me again.
>be 5 y/o in kindergarten
>parents still together at this time, mother takes care of me
>mother does a shit job of teaching me basic shit like counting money, hence me being the biggest dumbass in my kindergarten class
>hungry at lunch one day
>see old lady at stand with cookies for 50 cents
>pretty sure that 50 cents is half a dollar
>walk up to stand
>proceed to rip a one dollar bill in half in front of this old lady
>hand horrified old lady half a ripped dollar bill
>can't remember the rest really but I'm pretty sure i never got the cookie

>>729138547
If this is real, you hit the dad jackpot, anon.

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>>729138547
= your pops

>>729154666
Quit lying satan!

>>729144491
It was lightning and also the night of the switch to daylight saving time.

>>729154007
>be me, dinosaur
>don't understand why people want to walk like me
>they just lay on the floor and seizure anyways
>fuck them all, I hope some little kid walks in on a fat black orderly sucking off a skeleton

>>729158631
kek

>>729159011
I don't remember lightning completely washing out your surroundings and this was before anything like smartphones or the like that automatically changed to DST.

Not trying to discredit your thoughts, just something I should have clarified in my original post

>>729141278
Idk if you're still here but it is never too late to become a good person. Volunteer at the animal shelter if you don't like people. Buy a meal for a homeless person. It's just little things that it takes to be a better person.
You obviously know what makes good and bad. I'm sorry you were fucked up by the govt, many of us have been. But you're only furthering their goals if you remain a monster. Now you're one of their agents, if you pass on what was done to you.

They did this to you because the government is fucking wicked and they don't want you to be a good person. So fucking rebel against it. Be a good person because they don't want you to be.

They want you to be sad, miserable, unfulfilled.

You have free will, use it.

>be me 14yo
>at a friends b day party outside
>gets dark so me and some friends go exploring other yards
>one neighbor see us starts yelling so we run hop fences
>land behind a shed on a small hill dark as hell except a street light a few houses down
>4 of us laying on hill catching breath
>start to hear a sound
>look down my buddy sitting right next to me is getting his dick sucked by girl that is with us
>in the little light there is i watch her head bob up and down, sucking noise.
>buddy looks over at me and hold up his hand to give me a high five.
>friend bust nut in her mouth and she swallows.

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>>729132217
Probably not as good as some of the stories here, but
>had gym teacher in middle school
>always a little something off about him
>totally looked like the stereotypical pedophile
>One day, as we were getting dressed, he yelled "ALRIGHT BOYS< LETS GET PUMPED UP" or something along those lines, as he slapped a boys ass while he was wearing nothing but boxers
>Once saw him using a urinal, he was peeing in the weirdest way possible, he had his hands on his hips, stood straight up, and stared down at his dick like an eagle as it peed freely
he later got arrested because he poked a hole in his office to try to peep in the girls locker room, which was right beside his office.

>>729132217
The weirdest shit I've experienced is the absence of penis inspection days. They were quite common when I went to school.

>be me
>be 14 or 15
>everyone who reads this sentence is a faggot

>>729160234
I thought those were just at the doctors...

>>729141386
Your english is a helluva lot better than my (insert whatever your native language is)

>>729147547
continue

bamp

>>729143203
I can only imagine you as a tiny 12 year old Mr Freeze from the old Batman cartoons with that description which made the whole thing amazing

>>729155456
this made me lol