New feels thread, the old one wasnt finished just yet...

where did it go

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pls dont die, i was talking with someone...

I need some advice anons

there's this girl I'm talking to. We met online and started texting. Hit it off quite well texted nonstop. I text her and she opens it late at night and said (this is all in snapchat btw)
"Swrry I just saw this now
And I'm sleepy af
But I didn't wanna leave u hangin"

from past experience I know this could be the start of the end. My theory is being confirmed even more, I texted her again today and got left on read. Here are the options (scenarios) I thought of

A) ask her if she wants to continue chatting
If no/left on read just remove her as friend and move on

if yes, could cause awkwardness because she may ask (or think) why did I ask? and that just leads into a downward spiral and make shit awkward or it may work but I'd to plan out responses

B) Play the waiting game and if I don't hear from her just remove her as friend and move on

any advice anons?

So...did anyone come over to this one?

>>728501785
I have been there. I would confront her about it, but you do not need to be too stern about it. Maybe just ask whats up.
If she says no, move on while you can.
If she says yes, it may be a tad awkward at first but you can get over it.

>>728501860
some hopefully....
I tried to make this thread asap

>>728501785
B Don't overthink it and don't read into everything.

>>728501785
B because /b/ is always the right answer you poof

>>728501014
who were you talking to?

>>728502124
Some girl (i think) who wrote something vague about their problems and was having a really hard time. I asked to talk about it and the thread kinda ended there

>>728502001

it's 11:30 here and she's about an hour ahead what would you suggest then?

>>728502058
overthinking is my downfall...and fucks up a lot of things for me

>>728502270
Wait till tomorrow if you are gonna do it, its a little late tonight. Dont let it eat you up.

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>>728500811
this one made me feel a lot of things i dont want to talk about

>>728502389
any idea on why the sudden decline?

>>728502637
It could be anything honestly, she could be very busy, talking to other people, forgetting to respond
It is anyone's guess

>>728502244
It was probably me, since I got called out specifically for being vague. I'm still around. might still take you up on the offer...

>>728500811
I dont know what to think anymore. Im 18/m doing well in college and i just dont feel like life is worth living. I spend everyday deciding whether i want to die or not. I have friends and im interested in my pursued major, but i just cant seem to find a reason to go on, but for some reason i still do.

>>728502841
Yep sounds like you, and sure thing, just say so whenever you feel comfortable enough

>>728502270
Ok, so make this the time you overthink it (which I would guess you are) and DON'T react to it.

>>728502923
>I spend everyday deciding whether i want to die or not. I
Why? what specfically is going on or has gone in your life that you dont feel like its worth living

>>728503044
It's to late to react anyway she's probably sleeping and I don't have much to lose anyway

>>728502962
Thanks again. Somebody will probably give me shit for this, but having the offer out there is helping right now. A lot.

>>728503139
I guess the problem is that nothing goes on. I spend every day of every week doing the same thing, and for what?

>>728503238
Maybe, but if you try a different tactic than your normal one, you might have something to gain.

>>728503294
Why would they give you shit for it? and no problem, I am glad to be of help.

>>728503313
What do you want it to be for?

>>728503449
go on...

>>728503313
So you're having an exestential crisis because you have no motivation in your life. What you need is to find someone to be in a loving relationship with who will make you feel content and who you will want to work hard for .

>>728503547
I suppose if i knew the answer to that question, I wouldn't be here. I dont know and no outcome of my future appeals to me, which makes me question why i still bother to go on.

>>728503454
I'm an actual chick on /b/ complaining about my fucked up shit, and all I'm getting is kindness. I'm wondering how long this magic can last!

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>>728501388
>tfw she takes off your fucking mask

>>728503713
I suppose that's easier said than done. I have never had any sort of intimate relationship before.

>>728503915
Theres never been a better time than right now.

>>728503825
Haha yea I understand, well i guess there is still some decency on this site, especially on feels threads. I just want to be of help to someone, hopefully it will help me too in the process.

>>728501860
I did. I was the astronomy guy.

its here the anon who talk to me?
i am the anon1,2,3 guy

>>728503616
If you are overthinking everything and it's fucking you up, I'm guessing that you are reacting to it, not just overthinking. The more you go into the spiral of doubt and trying to see every angle, the more confusing things get. It's easy to get caught up in an idea go off half cocked. But if you were to try recognizing the thoughts as just that, but not reacting to them, then you get to see how things shake out. AND you have the knowledge that it wasn't your reaction that caused the outcome- knowledge that might come in handy next time you are in a similar situation.

>>728504034
True. This site never ceases to amaze me.
What's going on with you?

>>728503963
>>728503547
Thanks for the talk

>>728504552
For sure!

>>728501785
Better to live than to exist, faggot. Ask her. If she cares, she'll address it. If not, fuck her.

>>728504552
I can keep talking if you want advice about relationships. Been in quite a few with both men and women

>>728504538
Theres a lot of people on this site, you will never know who you will run into.
My stuff doesnt seem to be as harsh as yours, but its just I went through a bad breakup over a year ago and still havent recovered. Lost most of my friends and have tried and failed new relationships many times.
None of it feels the same either...
sorry for my rant, I am supposed to be the one helping you lol

>>728504872
Ive heard all of the advise about "joining clubs" and "just getting out there" and yet every single girl i have met are not interested, and frankly ive lost my motivation for seeking out girls.

I hate my life, but I'm unwilling to try to change it. I'm going to die never having changed, a complete and utter fuck up and a waste of space.

>>728505180
>for seeking out girls
have you tried men, or even better, traps?

Litterally so many desperate attention whore traps will throw themselves at you if you have an above average sized dick.

we all still here...?

Should i take my meds tonight?
I know it seems dumb that I'd ask that here. I just don't know if i should bother taking them. They don't seem to work. I think I've actually gotten worse since i started.

>>728505386
Men and traps just dont do it for me. Its also not about the sex, i dont need sexual affection. Just emotional intimacy with another person. Maybe im doomed to die alone.

>>728505005
I think ranting is what we are here for, and I can use the break from feeling sorry for myself. What do you mean when you say none of it feels the same?

>>728505921
I guess you are right.
Well like my emotions arent as strong as they used to be, i cant feel love like I used to, i feel almost numb sometimes when I know i shouldnt. Maybe I just havent found the right girl.
But then again, like no girls show interest in me and I swear im not ugly.

>>728505881
You are not doomed to die alone. Right now, there is a girl (fuck it- there are many girls) feeling the exact same way you are, and wishing they could meet you. They just haven't yet.

I have no life skills.
I can't even get myself to microwave food anymore.
I just care less and less each day, or more accurately, actively let my control over myself and will slip into oblivion.
I'm dead in the water and I haven't even hit 30. That means I have several decades of this until I die of natural causes. I'd love to kill myself, but I don't trust myself to not fuck up anything short of a shotgun to the roof of the mouth.

>>728505881
>Just emotional intimacy with another person

Well i completely understand what you are talking about, being intimate can involve having sex if you both really like eachoher. You would be surprised just how intimate sex can get between true lovers.

But since you like women you are going to have a decent challenge ahead of you. Fear not though, i suggest trying out both ok cupid and even tinder and just be completely honest with people. You seem like you dont feel comfortable going out to meet girls so i think online dating might work better for you. I know tinder is a hookup ap but i have been told some people actually use it for dating.

Other than that just work on your confidence a lot. Women REALLY REALLY like confidence to the point where ugly ass men can get laid on a daily basis because of their swagger and bravado. Just fake it till you make it. Dont be overconfident and arrogant, just be cool calm and collected.

>>728506125
Can I be blunt (but without judgement.)
If you are feeling like that, it might be showing through when you are talking with women. We are usually pretty good about picking up on it and steering away

>>728506283
Thats a comforting thought and maybe you're right. I guess ill keep going and see what happens. Thanks for talking to me, it really helped and i didnt think it would.

>>728506125
I guess my point is, you may have to heal before you are coming across as "ready"

No one can help me because I won't help myself. My shitty life is of my own making.
The funny thing is, objectively, I have it pretty good. But I can't manage to care enough to do anything.

>>728507055
why do you want your life to be fucked up. Why are you scared of success.

>>728507002
Glad I could help. We all have baggage- you just have to find the matching set.

>>728506861
I agree, it may show up sometimes. When I talk to women I usually put all that away since I am just happy to be talking to a girl.
But sometimes they just act like I dont exist, it just feels bad.

>>728507005
Yea I do agree, but its kinda scary since it has been over a year and I am still not ok...

>>728506471
I appreciate the advice.

>>728507144
Don't think I deserve it. Apathy. Crippling fear of failure in the way of even trying at all. Unrealistic expectations. Worried that if I start doing anything, people will start to have higher expectations of me, and when I fuck up I'll just be more of a disappointment. Lack of self-discipline, self-worth, and enough motivation to get me to do it.

Take your pick.

>>728505871
You have to want them to work. And you have to believe they will. Your mind is very powerful. That's why the placebo effect works.

>>728507438
Just promise to not give up. I know life can be rough sometimes but we all have shit to go through and sometimes it just seems worse than it actually is because we just constantly keep going over all the negative stuff in our heads and ignore all the things we have going for us.

OH and btw, i met my gf of 2 years on 4chan so dont think theres no chance you will never meet someone ;)

If a loser like me can find love you can do it no problem.

i can't tell whether my mind is clear or just empty

>>728507230
LOL...sorry but it's ironic you say that. It's been six years since my divorce, I thought I had dealt with my shit, and I'm STILL on here tonight because someone said something to me today that has made me cry for...oh...5 hours now?

I dunno if it helps, but it might not be anything against you. I know damn well I can be a raging bitch for no reason sometimes, even though (I like to believe) I am a pretty nice person most of the time.

>>728507744
I'll give it my best.

>>728507540
>Unrealistic expectations.
Can i ask a few questions about what your life was like growing up? How did your parents treat you? Did they have unreasonable expectations too? Have people been telling you for a while you dont deserve things?

I had a lot of these problems and it stemmed from the fact that my parents treated me like garbage and put way too much pressure on me to live up to their expectations.

>>728505871
Yes. Don't question it. Just take them.

>>728507932
Oh wow... see I just really dont want to be like this for several years. Love is the most important thing to me. You seem like a nice person to me at least. Also, do you mind sharing what the person said? Its fine if you dont want to though

>>728505871
>Should i take my meds tonight?
Depends what they are and what they are supposed to be treating.

Not all anti depressants are the same and your sytmpoms could be different from others.

I have been on 3 ssri's and 2 of them ended up making me suicidal as fuck until i got off of them. Talk to your doctor if you feel like your meds arent workng or making things worse. Do not ask 4chan about something they have no context for.

>>728508246
sorry no

>>728507986
>Can i ask a few questions about what your life was like growing up? How did your parents treat you?
I was the diagnosed patient of the family. So that was a thing.
>Did they have unreasonable expectations too?
If you asked me at the time, yes. Now, not really. I was just a little shit with no discipline or drive. Still am, really.
>Have people been telling you for a while you dont deserve things?
Quite the opposite, actually. I've always been told by teachers "Oh, you have such potential, if only you'd do your homework..." I've always been told I could do things, and never thought I could. I'll sabotage myself, come up with reasons something I did wasn't an accomplishment, or failing naturally on my own.

>I had a lot of these problems and it stemmed from the fact that my parents treated me like garbage and put way too much pressure on me to live up to their expectations.
Father is a narcissist. I wasn't perfect. Didn't go over well with him.

>>728508388
dubs. and yea i figured, thats fine. I feel bad that it makes you that upset. Nobody should have to cry for hours straight

>>728508246
That's just it...I don't THINK I've been that fucked up. I guess I was wrong. I have been in a couple relationships since then, and they weren't dysfunctional (other than just normal stuff) so today has really been messing with my head.
it sounds to me like it might make sense to make YOU the most important thing to you right now. Love will happen.

How we all doing? Here to help my fellow anons out.

>>728508246
Also, you just proved yourself wrong. I'm a chick, I am being nice to you (and not faking it) and I can tell you exist.

>>728508530
>was the diagnosed patient of the family.
Pls elaborate i dont really understand. You were sick a lot?

>I was just a little shit with no discipline or drive.
You are being too hard on yourself anon. You were a child of course you had no discipline or drive. IT seems like you had parents who were often angry at you for acting like a child and not an adult. I think you are letting their negative behavior towards you affect how you see yourself.

>I'll sabotage myself, come up with reasons something I did wasn't an accomplishment, or failing naturally on my own
Yeah i bet that was really tough. Im sorry you had to go through that anon. But you need to realize that your parents negative behavior towards you and how they treated you did not make you a bad kid.

If you are anything like me then the reason you ar self sabotaging is because you felt too much pressure and couldnt handle it so you ended up failing a lot. This lead to you developng the unconscious belief in your head that you will always fail at things and because of this your unconscious mind is sabotaging any sucess you mght have because it is so used to failure and wouldnt know how to handle anything different.

I can tell you how i got over it if you want.

>>728507876
What's wrong with both?

>>728508986
Then maybe life has been going alright for you since you didnt think you were in a bad shape, but maybe whatever that guy said just really got to you.

Since i have no love in my life I kinda have to take care of myself. Working out regularly, enjoying movies and games, exploring my hobbies more. Its all I can do really, I would just really like someone to share it with. Even just a real friend would do, like a platonic love kinda.

>>728509246
Haha you do have a good point there, but still its 4chan with all the anonymity, but I do still see your point, thanks :)

>>728508530
you ok anon?

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Hey feels anons. It’s been a long time since I’ve visited one of these threads. About a year ago I would visit these threads frequently, posting images and helping anons through their various problems. I’m no trained psychologist, but I did what I could. I just wanted to let you all know that there is hope. And while everyone takes a different path, and some things work better for some people, I feel like telling my story might help some of you find your own way to happiness. Or, at the very least, general wellness. (No greentext because I’m not great at writing in that particular format)

My story has no real hard beginning. See, that’s the thing about these kinds of things. They often grow over time. The seeds were sown long before they ever bore fruit, if you will. I was always a bit above the curve in terms of intelligence, but considerably behind it in terms of maturity. This is mostly due to the fact that I started primary school about a year before I should have due to a minor mistake on the part of my parents. As a result of this, I was often considered to be the immature one, even long before we were old enough to know that it was an issue of maturity. I found myself frequently excluded by my friends due to my behavior, and was only really able to remain steady friends with the other rejects. My best friend for years and years was a kid with ADHD and a few other minor mental conditions that were so debilitating he had to wear a weighted vest to take tests, and he even to this day doesn’t seem entirely… there. I’ll refer to him as Al if I ever mention him again. The rest of my best friends were the fat losers who started playing pokemon as soon as they were old enough to hold a Game Boy and got into card games like YuGiOh and Magic at the age of 9 (Don’t get me wrong, I love those guys to this day, but understand I wasn’t exactly of the kind of kids who played handball or Tech Decks during recess).

Cont? If there's no interest I can stop

>>728509366
Diagnosed patient is a psychology term. In a dysfunctional family unit, the diagnosed patient is the member of the family who is understood to be troubled, when it's not something wrong with them as a symptom of the dysfunctional family.

Nah. I always did well on tests. I just have never put much effort into anything. If I wasn't good at it, I stopped trying. That's what I meant by "unrealistic expectations".

>If you are anything like me then the reason you ar self sabotaging is because you felt too much pressure and couldnt handle it so you ended up failing a lot.
Nah. My mom's bipolar and my dad's a narcissistic, optimistic hippie with anger management issues. I never really stood a chance of normal psychological development.
>This lead to you developng the unconscious belief in your head that you will always fail at things and because of this your unconscious mind is sabotaging any sucess you mght have because it is so used to failure and wouldnt know how to handle anything different.
I have a conscious belief that I'll fail at everything, because even if I don't, I'll make myself. I won't let myself succeed, therefore I won't. I don't care/hate this enough to change, I don't have any self-worth to make myself want to change enough, and I don't have enough self-discipline to just push through it. I have none of the building blocks required to dig myself out of this hole.

>>728509511
I keep flipping between what he said and how I reacted. This wasn't some sort of deep emotional thing but he was a nice guy. I panicked and ran and I don't know what is scaring me more- what he said or how much I panicked.
Those are all good things. Working out certainly isn't going to hurt your chances.

>>728510157
I'd rather die than succeed in life, in the long term.
But short term, sure. As long as my uptime on distracting myself is high enough, I can be able to be happy enough to say that.

>>728510358
So it wasnt something that cut deep into you? Hmm, well idk what he said but it seems to have warranted your panic, so I would not worry about that.

Haha yea it wont for sure, i already have a good body, but could use some touch ups lol, (and not trying to be arrogant) so it helps. Seriously considering joining the army in the near-ish future too.

>>728509474
i guess what I'm getting at is whether I'm at peace with myself or just devoid of any thought, like just a shell of a person or something

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>>728500811
Batman's such a pussy.

>>728510792
Fine. Fuck it. We've been trading dirty messages and he said something about choking me in the middle of it. I don't think he was trying to actually be abusive; I know some girls like that kind of play. My drunk ex held me down by the throat...I hope thats clear enough

>>728510947
You are probably more normal than you think. But you can only compare your mind to what you assume others are thinking, so its confusing

>>728511520
Oh I think I understand now... it brought back a flood of memories? If so, you can just tell him about what happened to you, he should understand. If you trust him with that information, that is.
I know he definitely wasnt trying to be abusive, especially since you said he was a nice guy. It was an honest mistake on his part, he didnt know any better.
You should recover, then maybe talk to him about that to clear everything up if you are good with that.

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The person I was in love (still am) told me just to be friends, things went too fast, I'm here at 1 a.m. watching South Park, and trying to accept that they won't show the same love to me. I can't get them off my mind, even when I was trying to ignore it while out with family.

>>728500811
whys batman an emo faggot now

>>728511853
I can't. I am literally crying my eyes out again. I am just broken right now and I jsut cant. This wasnt a relationship just being dirty online i know he didnt know and i know its not his fault but i just want crawl away rightnow and i am scared and i dont fucking know why but i am just so fucked up

>>728511095
>I have skin cancer that will never die too, so every moment of my life is in excruciating pain

pain from skin cancer is incredibly rare tbh fam. Now if he had pancreas or bone cancer sure. Skin cancer not so much.

>>728512178
Batman has ALWAYS had Psychological problems. Textbook definition of Martyrdom Syndrome.

>>728510792
the only reason I am still on right now is because I am afraid to go to bed

>>728512406
Im really sorry, I wasnt trying to nudge it out of you. You are ok, its normal to react to such a traumatic situation this way. You will be ok, just let it out and comfort yourself with the things around you. I am here for you

>>728512617
Dont be afraid, nothing bad will happen. Deep breaths will help

>>728512668
I thought if I just fucking said it I would feel better. I didnt. nobody even knows in real life so i cant call anyone

>>728512860
I see... stuff like that wont ever feel good, but at least it wont be bottled up inside you anymore. At least one other person knows what you are going through, and that person is willing to help

I've avoided alcohol most of my life. Alcohol itself tastes fucking nasty and I always knew I had trouble with escapism. Didn't think I needed to become an alcoholic in addition to my other problems. Mot too long ago, I started drinking a single Mike's Hard Lemonade if I needed to pull my head out of my depression, because you can't taste the alcohol. Lately, it started becoming "necessary" more often. I'm not sure If I should let myself become an alcoholic just so I can actually hit rock bottom and finally just either kill myself or choose to get better. As is, I've been basically entirely stagnant with 0 responsibilities for about half a decade, and wanted to kill myself since about third grade.

>>728513013
thanks

>>728513213
no problem, I hate to see people go through this kind of stuff

>>728513091
Get better, no question

>>728513471
That's the least likely scenario as it stands, honestly.

>>728503713
Fuck you, faggot.

Boohoo, Im doing well in college and my life sucks because everything is fine!

WELL FUCK YOU

My brother in law died yesterday at a young age, and he had a daughter. And his death made me realize something: STOP BEING A FUCKING ANGSTY PIECE OF SHIT, AND DO WHAT YOU CAN, WHILE YOU STILL CAN.

WHEN YOU'RE FINISHED WITH YOUR STUPID EDUCATION, GO OUT, AND DO WHAT YOU WANT. FUCKER.

>>728500811
man I wana see my mom again but I know it would leave me so broken and hurt..
got me with old Batman.

>>728513595
You're asking for help so maybe it's not that unlikely?

>>728513689
Sorry, I meant to quote this piece of shit. >>728502923

Hmm, how many people are in here?
Just need to speak with someone is all.

>>728510272
Guess not. Later, all.

>>728513725
Nah. I see a therapist biweekly. I've been to some sort of therapy for basically my whole life. Been to a couple Psychiatrists.
I just don't want to change enough. I'm resistant to it. I think I deserve to feel like a waste of space. Etc.
Plenty of other reasons and justifications I could come up with. But at the end of the day, doesn't really matter. Because I won't even try.

>>728513213
713
815
1489 in case you need to vent more

>>728513973
Thank you. You;ve been great. I think I am going to call my sister to come over so Im not alone.

>>728501785
Maybe she's a normal fucking human being with activities and things to do throughout the day. Some girls aren't glued to their phones when they're busy.

>>728514208
Very good idea, she will keep you good company. I am glad to be a help. You can still text whenever, its not like i text anyone ha

>>728506396
are you me?

>>728514344
Ahh, self-deprecating humor. When you can't hurt anymore, you learn to laugh.
Probably too familiar for my own good.

>>728513835
You misspelled excuses. And most of us feel like we don't deserve better. Do you care enough about someone else to do it for them, even for a little while?

>>728506861
what's this "we" shit you silly trap

>>728514517
Yea it can be in good fun sometimes, but other times it can really hit close. I try not to use it too often since sometimes it makes me really look at myself.

>>728514344
ok

>>728514527
Sure, call them excuses. I don't really value myself enough to think I'm better than that.
Nope. Not really. If I do kill myself, I'm basically banking on the fact that death is lack of consciousness forever. Can't really feel bad about what you've done that impacted others if you don't exist.

>>728514771
You're mistaken. Even if you don't exist they still do.

>>728510524
ldk man listening to everything you said and comparing notes here, I don't have too much sympathy for you .... sounds like your spoiled tbh but what would I know about spoiled I've had to work since I was 16.

>>728515057
No, I'm not. I'd just be dead. I wouldn't exist to apologize or lament. I'd just not exist.

>>728513091
don't "Let" yourself become an alchy you fool...

>>728512409
It spread to his entire body.

>>728515158
Didn't really expect anyone to have sympathy. Just getting it out there. Hell if I know why. Not like it helps, the problem is still there and will continue to be there because I keep it that way.

>>728503713
are you my fucking stepdad, with your half full of shit water mentality?

>>728515368
Fair enough. If I do deserve this like I think I do, then I'll just let it be.

>>728513689
oy vey man that's some real mourning rage.
Do your best to help that man's daughter realize her better qualities and remember the good things about him.

>>728514517
makes people feel fucking awkward in the wrong context I've found, but I'm also borderline aspie so all social experiences are new and nerve wracking.

>>728514771
>>728515323
He's right you know, >>728515057

>>728515461
It's cool dude, just hope it helps you get over the mountain inside.

Going to bump with quotes/poems that I've written because why not.

The Laughs, The Smiles, The Love and The Comfort
Thank You For It All
It was a feeling I had long since forgotten

Up upon this mountain which brought me to my new high; it will bring me to my new low. A new low down below where I shall remain

>>728515461
>>728516158
the thing I said before that is. In any case a few weeks alone in the woods on purpose would prolly do it for you. I'm not joking.

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>>728516074
He isn't right. I'm fully aware of the impact of my actions. But I'd be dead, and nothing would be my problem at that point, because I wouldn't BE. I'm very well aware that suicide is entirely selfish.
Pic related.

>>728515651
bearing the weight of reality is much better than dealing with coming out of severe alcoholism. Most would agree. Don't be like me and make it 1000 times harder to get off it (alchy for 7 years)

>>728516273
Parents tried sending me to wilderness camp during the summer after 9th grade, funny enough. Wasn't alone, but definitely in a forest. Just hiked from point to point weekly. Didn't even have tents. A tarp, a burlap sleeping bag, and a wool blanket that wed fold and tie into a pack.

Got home, went back to the same shit I did before.

As I sit here admiring the world for what she is
As I sit here warmer then ever before
As I sit here with a razor ever so deep inside of me
As I sit here staring upon this forsaken world I know something
As I sit here watching the day turn to the 8th I know what I must do
As I sit here, I get the strength to drop off my letter to you so you know why
As I sit here beginning to walk stumbling a cop stops me
As I sit here, dizzy and placed under mental health I am placed in a Ambulance
As I sit here, in this ward I know I am better
As I sit here, returning to work a couple days later, I cry to you begging forgiveness
As I sit here, I know the old me is dead.

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>>728516335
>mfw I was agreeing with you, but you thought I was agreeing with them

>>728516335
Ok, fine. So stop making excuses to die and figure out any excuse to live.

>>728516604
Did you go out somewhere in mother fucking UTAH???

>>728516604
also I mean entirely on your own no supervision same gear, if you so choose....... and do NOT come back until two weeks later. It made a new man of a good friend of mine. Gona do it in the summer when my vacation comes up.

>>728516674
What a simplistic understanding of humans.
>he can see what I see so obviously he must come to the same conclusion as I do
That's nowhere near how it works, anon.

>>728516716
Nah. Arizona. I can see why you'd guess that, though.

>>728516664
In that case, you used a formatting I was unused to. Generally around here, people use the person they're replying to at the top, and the content after that.

>>728516335
I know I can't say anything that would stop you but if I may tell you a story it might change your mind

>Me and a friend named Marcela. We were very close, border lining a relationship but neither of us wanted it.
>Very open to her and vise versa.
>I knew she was depressed, cuts, beginning of drug abuse, recklessness
>She ended up sending me a message saying sorry and slitting her wrist open.
>I ended up going over to her house and tried to stop her cut and I failed.
>I held my friend as she died. I held her as she bled out.
>The ambulance paramedics couldn't even help her by the time they arrived.
>When she got to the hospital she was diagnosed as dead.
>Its been 5 years and I still have nightmares about that night, her mother ended up starting drinking and her broke up with her father
>23 long marriage destroyed because of their daughters suicide.
>Wish I was joking about this story, she saved my life more then once, wish I could of done the same.

>>728516984
actually its cuz when I was a young pot head, my parents did the same thing, sent me into the Aspiro advent program, came back 2 months later with my savings drained from them paying for it all with MY FUCKING MONEY then went back to smoking pot AND doing pills...... fucking loved my childhood.

>>728517136
I've only been here a year. Guess it shows
>muh newfaggetry

>>728516335
Sorry about my English, its not my first language.

>>728517231
Your Engrish is great faggot.

>>728516836
Ehh. Can't really drive, so that's not a likely thing.
I expect if I actually were to do that, I'd do the same thing I did then and starve the first few days to weeks. Be one way to die, I suppose.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWsTpEBut88
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkDnIwe1hZ8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KC715_Foz9A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNCWniCTiY4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFXzVryW5b8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8RXRtqX0QaY

>>728517145
Sorry to hear that. I knew a gal who sent me pics of her slit open wrists twice, so I can almost empathize.

Ehh. Not like I'll be killing myself any time soon. Not that lucky. Heh...

Late here, but yesterday I went to womans house, after years of cutting off friends, dealing with drug addiction, anorexia and unobtainable perfectionism and keeping it all under lock and key in fear of scaring people off, I finally felt like I could open up to this new person, they didnt drain me. I could keep constant eye contact with them. She made me dinner and I had the first conversation with someone else without over analyzing every sentence. We went to bed, no kissing no fucking I just massaged her back for a while and then we layed down, after years of feeling nothing but vexation and discomfort around peoplelI finally realized how lonely I was. And this woman made me realize it, I dont know how she feels about this now, and If she even wants to go anywhere with this, and im not even sure Im in psychological shape for a relationship. now its 3:00 and Ive felt like ive had a flare gun fired into my chest all day.

>>728516906
Not saying it's simple. But I'm willing to give any argument a shot when attempting to talk someone out of suicide. An excuse to live is better than an excuse to die.

>>728517154
Funny, yeah. Same deal. I was the only kid there of my own volition AND not for drugs.

We called it "Treehab".

>>728517221
Don't sweat it. To use the wisdom of old:
>lurk moar

>>728517545
I'd suggest explaining your story a bit and see if she'd be up for a relationship. Just take your time with her and slowly tell don't just open up and spill things out like I did with my current girlfriend.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=si39PoRDFrI

>>728517611
I appreciate the thought. It's been... Since third grade I've wanted to kill myself. That's nothing really a case where you CAN find a reason to live.
I'm not in any immediate danger. I mean, I'm laying in bed starving, but that's the worst of it. I don't trust myself to not fuck up anything short of bird shot to the brain, and I have access to neither that nor a shotgun, so that's not happening anytime soon.

>>728514344
are you still on?

>>728501388

You know what's under Batman's mask?

Another mask.

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>>728518058
Both Bruce Wayne AND Batman are the mask.

>mfw the end of The Killing Joke makes you break out into tears because the joke that's told hits too goddamn close to home

Can I get some shit off my chest, Anons?

I'm losing everything and I have no one to vent to.

>>728518478
Of course thats what these threads are for.

>>728518478
we're all ears, anon

>>728517349
That's the whole point friend!
If you don't die, your life has all sorts of meaning, and it's a funny story.

>>728517617
Hahahaha. I barely even remember most of my journey being stone cold sober at the time. Hope I see much of it when I die as a last glimpse at some beautiful scenery, that was the part I really enjoyed.

>>728518992
Funny story, we were two weeks behind by the time I got out. I ended up pulling 14 miles in 2 days to get there on time.

>>728518609
Thanks, Anon.

This has been the worst week of my life.

I lost my job and trying to find a new one has been hell.

Then I found out my gf of 2 years was cheating on me with an old friend. She moved out after she found out i lost my job and changed her number so I can't contact her. She told my friends that I cheated on her and threatened to her and now most of them are ignoring me.

On Thursday the fridge broke and now I need a new one, but can't afford it.

On Friday, I found out that someone slashed three of tires for insurance won't cover it (possibly ex, but can't prove it).

Today, I was so stressed I couldn't function. I ended up getting drunk and playing vidya all day, but it really didn't help.

I have enough savings to fix the car and pay rent, but I need a job in the next week if I want to be able to survive another month

>>728519706
You seem like a really resilient and reliable guy anon, you work, and thats what really matters. Your gf is a bitch, alot of bitches usually process information in life in a way were it pertains to them.

Welp, I decided to mute all my ex girlfriends posts on facebook so I didnt have to see her posts for a while and I decided to just check what shes been up to and whaddya know shes already dating someone else. Year and a half later and shes over everything in a matter of a couple weeks. How the fuck is it so easy for them to just "get over it" /b/. Why did I fucking end it.

>>728521748
Damn dont tell me the thread died...

>>728519706
Just remember, it could be worse mate. My ex wife didn't let me see my kids (Twins, m&f, 12) on my birthday yesterday (yay turned 36) and I don't have any family besides them left. And I work in a deadend office with a bunch of assholes. Hell, no-one even said happy birthday yesterday..

>>728522452
Damn man, im sorry. It could be a lot worse, and im thankful it isnt. Just, the first girl that didnt fuck me over haha. and I ended it because I didnt think it would work anymore. Now the regrets setting in, maybe its because Im lonely. I dunno. I just dont have anyone to talk to and my thoughts were getting to me. But happy birthday man, everyone should get at least one of those. Even from a stranger. Hopefully things work out for you.

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>>728523211
I felt pretty much the same when my wife left me. And trust me, if you thought it won't work out, it wouldn't have worked out, so you did the right thing. And if you don't have anyone to talk too, remember that feels threads are a daily thing..
Oh and don't start drinking, just a pro tip.

>>728523654
And hell, now that I think about it, I haven't seen my kids for roughly eight months... Another pro tip for all the younger people in this thread. Don't get married

>>728511918
give it some time, it will pass
focus on other pleasant activities

I've got a major issue anons. I'm in an LDR and I keep fucking lying about shit and it's ruining our relationship. I get so scared of how he'd react if I told the truth, that I try to cover it up which almost always ends up causing more problems. I feel so fucking broken, I love him so much and I fucking know that lying isn't necessary and he's certainly not going to put up with my shit much longer(I don't think I would either). Latest instance was this night(usually it's over very small things, but this one was big):
A couple weeks ago I brought up that I was planning on getting a tattoo and had an appointment.
1/2

>>728524066
He was strongly against the idea, and said if I got one alone, then we wouldn't get one together(we planned on getting matching ones). A few minutes later he went on to say that it'd cause a major dent in our relationship if I got it. For the rest of the night he kind of sulked and was nonresponsive on skype, so I ended up saying I wasn't going to get one (I didn't want to dissapoint him or make him angry with me, and yes I know lying would equal the same thing but I can't fucking get that through my head). He perked up right away, and it wasn't until minutes later that I realized I already put a $50 deposit on the tattoo. Being the retard that I am, I decided to go ahead and get the tattoo, keeping it hidden from him. Fast forward to tonight, he offhandedly asked "You didn't get a tattoo right?", to which my immediate response was "no, of course not!". Fucking retarded, if I just went with the truth everything would've been fine. A little later when I had my cam on, I must've accidentally flashed the tattoo, which triggered him to ask what it was "was it henna?" I said yeah and he went on to say that if it's like a sketch for a tattoo I wanted to get that's fine, but "know the consiquences". I was too pussy to say that it was already an actual tattoo, so I went along with it like a retard hoping to god that I don't get in trouble. Needless to say he caught on, and he hasn't responded since. I'm so fucking stupid and I don't want to lie to him, I don't know how to explain it with out sounding retarded. I don't know what to do any more, I'm singlehandedly ruining my relationship by lying about things, and everytime I think I have a handle on it, I do it again.
2/2

>>728524085
Well, that's what you get for lying, but hey, atleast you didn't get any diseases from getting one...

>>728524288
oh absolutely I agree, I deserve all of the shit I get from it

>>728524391
But hey, atleast you aren't like my ex-wife who lied about alot worse things, for example: her loving me, her beeing a good parent and so forth

>>728524823
That's the worst fucking part for me, it's always about small shit. He had a rule where I had to wear a bra at all times in while inside the house (I live with a friend and her family currently), I broke that rule one day and he noticed on video, and I got in massive trouble for it. If I had just worn a bra it would've been fine, but I can't follow simple directions.

>>728524085
That really doesn't sound that bad by itself, but like you said it's part of some larger pattern

Maybe just express to him how much you care what he thinks, how much you hate to disappoint him

my 2c

>>728517145

Wow, that is really gay and pathetic.

>>728519706

Jesus man, that is rough.

>>728525030
So... Do you have a normal relationship? Because if you don't have a dom/sub type thing, that seems kinda suspect...

>>728525755
I've tried to express it so many times in the past, but he always says if I really didn't want to disappoint him, I wouldn't lie in the first place. I completely understand his logic there, and I don't know how to explain it to him without him shutting me out.

>>728525075
normal relationship

>>728526195
Ok. The rules and stuff like that are a bit more controlling than most normal relationships. Just want to make sure you're safe.

>>728526457
he gets v upset when rules aren't followed, on rare occasions he'll say it's fine but then he'll say things like me not listening to him is going to be the downfall of our relationship.

>>728500811
>>728501388
>>728511095
This shit is gay. Ruining his character.

Evening guys, haven't been to one of these for a while, but I felt like I really just need one tonight.