>super powers dumbed down come up with a super power and anons

>>726063183
You can no longer survive within an atmosphere

>>726064093
Also my power is to influence others to my will

super power: time manipulation

>>726064537
You age faster while you do

>>726064152
but your dick shrinks everytime you use it

>>726064152
No one will ever really like you

Power: I only get dubs

>>726064779
Thats not how this works.

Power: Have the telepathic knowledge to know exactly what color socks someone is wearing at any given time.

>>726065230
it only works in /po/

>>726065328
Your socks are always broke

Ability to teleport

>>726065328
mismatched socks become a fad

>>726065328
You're colorblind. You still KNOW what color socks they're wearing, you just can't see color anymore.

My power is pyromancy.

>>726065328
>Power: Have the telepathic knowledge to know exactly what color socks someone is wearing at any given time.
if they're wearing different colored socks then you only get one color. if they're wearing no socks then it gives you a random color.

Reality manipulation. Have fun coming up with a downside to that, cause I can just manipulate reality to make that downside not so.

>>726065504
Every time you do you smell like ass

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>>726064093

>>726065703
You can only manipulate realities that you aren't in.

the power to turn any weakness into a strength

>>726065504
Every time you do, you can literally feel your cells, molecules, atoms come apart and reassemble. Hurts like fuck.

>>726065789
oh my dear lord

>>726065898
Sheeeeeit

>>726065878
But it only works on other people

>>726065703
>Reality manipulation
you can't control it. It is instead controlled by your emotions.

>>726065703
youre always a stupid faggot independent of reality

>>726064537
but you can only remember cringey shit you did as a kid

The ability to control what my farts smell like

>>726065662
My power is pyromancy
only works when your target is water.

>>726066096
Can only be bad smells>>726066096

>>726065878
your only weakness is your inability to deepthroat

>>726066096
you can no longer fart.

>>726066154
kek

>>726066096
The smell of other farts is greatly amplified.

>>726066121
Cool I'll just target the water inside your body.
>oh your skin/organs are in the way of my fireball thats aimed at the water inside you

>>726066222
Legit

>>726065936
Ikr, trying to findout who she is

>>726063183

Super Power: The ability to add extra chromosomes to living creatures.

>>726066222
You don't need a fire ball you can just "ignite" the water and boil them from the inside. Way more brutal than setting them on fire anyway.

>>726066347
You can only add one extra 21st chromosome and only to yourself

>>726066222
ok
you need to consume gasoline to use your power, which is still poisonous to you.

>>726066392
Oh true good idea anon, imagine the steam collecting in their blood

>>726066347
You can only add them to potatoes.

>>726063183
The ability to change genders everytime you sneeze

>>726066487
They'd basically just disintegrate

>>726066494
Potatoes aren't alive

>>726066417
Holy fuck my sides

>>726066546
but genitalia are switched (girl/penis, boy/vag)

>>726066546
no more allergies to you
you basically can't sneeze

>>726063183
The ability to roll a 5 at any given whim

The power to not have a power.

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>>726066701
Forgot pic

>>726066755
Only works if you have a power

>>726066546
You can only change into an attack helicopter

>>726066755
but being fully aware that it's still a power

>>726066755
You will eventually unlock said power sometime down in life

I want the ability to make you reply to this post or else your mother dies in her sleep, with no immunities.

The ability to get dubs at will.

>>726063183
But you have to suck in air from a fat guys ass.

>>726066976
You never will it so

>>726066967
Only works on /g/

>>726066967
You can only use it once

>>726066546
you feel immense pain when your penis falls off or you feel great pain when your reproductive organs fall out of your vagina, then your skin slowly gets stretched into a functional penis.

>>726066888
Checked

>>726067099
Checked

>>726066976
and whoever replies gets quads

>>726066967
it only works on people who's mothers have already died

>>726065662
Your flames are lukewarm

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SuperPower:
The ability to transform into multiple forms

>>726067188
or dubs ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>726066967
for each reply you loose a part of your body.

>>726066822
Showing some love

>>726067230
The forms are unspecified.

the ability to speak every language

>>726067230
only different forms of sjws

>>726067230
each one is compromised of more and more penises

>>726063183
But by doing that; you're completely fixed in space, fully conscious, but unable to move from that fixed point.

>>726067330
You can't understand any language, only speak it.

>>726067330
Can only scream any other language than your native language

>>726067319
The power to make everything like a old timey film, with the dancing and brown video and everything.

>>726067330
but nobody understands b/c of accent

Perfect Immortality. Regeneration, eternal youth, ability to kinda just pop back into existence if all atoms of your being are destroyed.

>>726065703
"reality manipulation", unbound by some kind of rules, is a stupid superpower. Writer's excuse to say "whatever I want, always for eternity." Where do you even go with something like that? Even Neo still has to fight agents and shit when he's in the Matrix.

>>726067230
you can only transform over the course of millions of years. you still age btw

>>726067502
You're stuck in temporal stasis forever.

>>726067388
just make it subatomic penises

>>726067330
you can only do it while farting

>>726067502
You will never find love.

>>726067502
You're a ghost

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The ability to mimic powers from a anime character

>>726067502
No one can see you, or interact with you in any way

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>>726067567
I'm alright with this. Then I can just become a vampire.

>>726067641
But only Hamtaro characters

>>726067641
You hang yourself due to a wanting to be in the anime world

The power to pee from any orifice

>>726067641
Can never shave your neckbeard

The ability to fall asleep and wake up exactly when I want

>>726067448
you can only do it once and it's permanent

>>726067706
you have to pee out of every orifice

The power to piss, shit and cum from any of my orifices

>>726067704
With a barbed rope

>>726067660
No, like, you can't move and you don't experience time. You can't think and are unaware of anything and everything.

>>726067502
you can still feel pain. so if you're stuck have fun starving for the rest of eternity

>>726067694
KEK

>>726067706
you have taste buds in every orifice

>>726067717
But not where you want.

My superpower would be to be able to shape anything material to my will.

>>726067718
>Implying I'd wanna change it back to normal ever

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A gun with infinite ammo that only certain people with supernatural powers can see and you can fully control the path of the bullets

>>726067853
least I can taste pussy whilst I fuck it, but anal might be off the table

>>726067885
Its your dick.

>>726067717
In order to activate that power, you must first undergo the Russian Sleep Experiment.

>>726067885
Gun is permanently jammed

>>726067885
The gun jams every time you try to use it.

>>726067972
How is that a downside?

>>726067972
top kek

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Ability to steal people's souls through gambling

>>726068002
because you have to show people your pee pee before killing them and that's gross!!!!

Also I imagine shooting bullets out of your urethra isn't pleasant

>>726067839
I was hoping someone would appreciate that lol

>>726067741
you can't control which orifice it comes from and you can't distinguish whether you're pissing shitting or cumming

>>726068068
You lose every time

Ability to roll trips or better on every post

>>726068068

If you lose or cheat, you lose your soul instead.

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Supreme children's card game skills and all of the world's wealth

>>726068068
You always lose the gamble

The power to make any woman crave my dick

>>726068130
vigrin

>>726068182
Only works on toddlers

>>726068130

You get sent to the shadow realm for eternity within five years of you first activating your power and everyone forgets you ever existed

>>726068182
the woman will always say you raped her afterwards.

>>726068068
The house always changes the dice on you.

>>726067330

You can no longer hear.

>>726068182

They crave it so much that they literally want to eat it. Sex with women becomes incredibly dangerous for your dick's health as a result.

>>726068130
You never feel like playing

>>726068182
They stop craving after sex and then claim you raped them

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Blow shit up with a cat man ghost. You can also kind of control the explode. like it doesn't make noise or can not damage anything around the exploding object just get rid of the object

>>726068182
>>726068253
This

>>726068127
4chan is the only website you can access

>>726068182
Crave as in eat.

>>726068350
youre cat man ghosts fuck slave

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The ability to play games that if a person loses they will recieve a punishment

>>726068350
The explosion comes from your dick and travels to target location, exploding your dick along the way

>>726068350

Your explosions will randomly do the opposite of what you want. If you want it to not make noise, it has a chance to be extremely loud. If you want it to be small, it has a chance to nuke half the continent.

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Immortal vampire that can stop time for a few seconds using a manifestation of his fighting spirit which can punch/kick things also you can fly and have an infinite amount of knives and steamrollers

>>726068350
>>726068436
and cat dicks have spikes

>>726068461
If you lose or cheat you receive the punishment instead

>>726068350
the cat man ghost is constantly feeling you up and will explode every part it touches.

>>726068461
You can't win

I have a couple

I can change my age at will
I can spawn anything
I can jump throughout universes
I can change anyone's thoughts

Not reading though the thread because I want to die.

>>726068461
and you never win

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You get to be Dungeon Worm and do Dungeon Worm things. like taxes

>>726068476
Jojo gets canceled

>>726068476
You still age. After a couple hundred years you'll be a wrinkly sack of bones and meat that can't do shit

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You can control the speed at which time flows, steal people's memories as DISKs, and control gravity

>>726068476
All road departments switch from asphalt to concrete, making steamrollers useless.

>>726068595
but Kevin Bacon's always on your ass, forcing you to live in constant fear for your life

>>726068476
it only works while you're outside during day.

>>726068546
>I can change my age at will
You can only make yourself older
>I can spawn anything
The matter to spawn things comes directly from your dick
>I can jump throughout universes
You can only visit any universe once, once you leave you can't come back
>I can change anyone's thoughts
They are aware that you did it

>>726068632
I don't think you know what a vampire is

>>726067330
You speak them all in an impenetrable cockney accent that almost no one other than other cockneys can understand.

You get $12

Power to instantly create perfectly prepared food of any kind out of nothing.

The power to sink any ship I'm standing on.

>>726068811
The main ingredient is always semen

The power to take endless quantities of drugs without incurring any physical harm or dependency

>>726068811
it's all indian food

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Whenever you want you can make anyone die just like Kakyoin did

>>726068811
You get nailed to a cross.

>>726068802
You get $12 Zimbabwe dollars

>>726068802
>$12 Canadian

>>726068859
Then it wouldn't be perfectly prepared. Gotta pick something else

>>726068811
you get fat

>>726063183
>exposition
ex·po·si·tion
ˌekspəˈziSH(ə)n/
noun
noun: exposition; plural noun: expositions

1. a comprehensive description and explanation of an idea or theory.

2. a large public exhibition of art or trade goods.

I think you're looking for "exposure" there, buddy boy

The power to spawn money just by looking at something

>>726068730
>implying that the definition of vampire necessarily includes eternal youth
>immortality not necessarily eternal youth
>playing a game of semantics, gets mad when someone takes advantage of loopholes in their statement

>>726068802
You actually only get $11

>>726068904
>what does "any kind" mean?

>>726068476

you are blind and deaf

>>726068983
>nobodycares.jpg

>>726068924
kek!

>>726068963
Nope

>>726068974
>implying he isn't already fat

The ability to talk to dead people

>>726068811

All of it tastes exactly the same:
Literal human feces

>>726069091
They don't stop talking. Ever.

>>726069091
They are dead so you can talk to them but they do not respond

Power to instantly remove the downside from this power and generating small amounts of pubic hair on my fingertips every once in a while.

>>726069084
Well your attempt to corrupt my power is dismissed then

>>726069091
hitler won't leave you alone

>>726068546
>I can change my age at will
you can only change the age a certan body part once.
>I can spawn anything
it always spawns somewhere inside your body and it usually gets stuck there.
>I can jump throughout universes
whenever you jump you end up in empty space and proceed to asphixiate
>I can change anyone's thoughts
you can't control it.

>>726069091
You have to kill yourself first

>>726069091
you can't talk to the living

>>726068910
Everybody knows that you did it.

>>726069165
i see what you did there

The ability to see the flaw and solution to anything.

>>726068802
a nigga muggs you

>>726068892
The drugs are all different varieties of over the counter analgesics

>enjoy your ibuprofen faggot

The ability to communicate with any animal

>>726068892
You never get entitled to compensation whenever one of them starts killing people.

>>726069174
Top fucking kek

>>726069252
But you can't do anything about it

>>726069252
You are unable to come up with a solution or express the flaw to other people in terms that they understand.

>>726069252
Only after its happened

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You probably should go visit s.n.a.p,c,h.a.t.y(,)me to fap to your ex-gfs nudes.

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>>726068675

>>726068811
you can only do it when you're full

Power to transform into a gingerbread man at will.

The power to see.

I'm blind and use text readers and talk-to-type.

The ability to control the climate/environment

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>>726069276
Your dad is nigel thornberry

>>726069456
I can catch you

>>726069252
Nobody listens to you.

>>726064889
How's that different from normal?

>>726069009
a million dollars spawns above your head and crushes you to death

>>726069464
You can no longer hear

>>726069456
You cannot transform back at will.

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>>726069341

>>726069456
You can't transform back

>>726069464
You become deaf

>>726069472
Only within ten feet of you

>>726069009
it's all monopoly dollars

>>726067710
kek

>>726069567
>>726069586
Well shit.

>>726067710
Underrated post

>>726069484
You were aborted

>>726069472
The weather still can only change as fast as in real life. It takes a day or two to summon a rain storm and has knock-on effects for the surrounding areas.

>>726069170
the downside is generating small amounts of pubic hair on your fingertips every once in a while.

>>726069572
>>726069586
Hive mindfu

>>726065762
So literally Nightcrawler?
The comic book equivalent now has it worse than anon. Teleports, smells like ass when he does, and has to be a furry blue two fingered freak.

The ability to live

>>726069724
one day you die

>>726069170
The downside is that there is no downside. Negating the downside forces the universe to roll a new random downside for your power

>>726069724
You waste all your time on 4chan.

>>726069276
ant hills and bee hives drive you absolutely crazy

The ability to talk and have a relationship with any cereal box mascot

>>726069724
But you don't want to

>>726069724
The downside is that isn't a fucking superpower you moron.

>>726069722
I thought his only flaw was that he needed to be able to know where he was teleporting otherwise he gets stuck in a wall forever

>>726063183
The ability to bleach assholes purely by telepathic means

>>726069800
They all despise you

>>726069845
You never know if it worked

>>726069845
You can't choose which asshole. Triggering your power bleaches a random person's asshole in a 500 mile radius of you

This can be a downside or a benefit based on how you see it

>>726069800
Cap'n Crunch kills you in a murder suicide after you cheat on him with Tony the Tiger

>>726069174
sounds like a sitcom

>>726069845
Only works on family members

>>726066222
Ah, ah ah, you never said fireball. You need to specify that shit nigger

Power: Innability to feel pain.

>>726069829
Tell that to dead people.

>>726069464
Your newfound sight includes not just visible light that most people see, but the entire EM spectrum. Since no one else can see it, you have no way of effectively communicating to them what you are experiencing.

>>726069845
for every ass you bleach a pornstars ass goes brown

>>726069986
Can no longer feel pleasure

Phone battery never depletes

>>726069986

That's a disease.

Downside: You can still die, and never know if there's something wrong with your body

>>726069986
>not knowing how pyromancy works

Can change into any clothes i want with the snap of a finger

>>726069986
That's actually a real thing.
People with it end up getting proper fucked up because they don't know when their bodies are injured.

>>726070100

Shattered screen

>>726063183
Pee that never freezes

>>726070123
they're always 2 sizes too big

The ability to hear color and see sound

>>726070100
It's a razr

>>726070123
Fingers always break upon snap.

>>726067502
That's enough of a downside in itself. Either you watch your loved ones age and die before your eyes over and over again, or avoid that pain and live for eternity with nobody to love. It's why I don't envy Deadpool, or The Doctor, or anyone else who lives unnaturally long lives.

>>726070123
But theyre all on fire

>>726070123
Your fingers need to literally snap to use your power

>>726070123
you have no fingers

>>726070123

Sometimes the clothes will be in the wrong place, you'll snap your fingers and have your head through the crotch of your pants

>>726070178
it's 1000 degrees celsius

>>726070191

You can't see color or hear sound as a result

>>726068904
Curry is fucking delicious man, that's fine by me.

>>726070191
But you can no longer see color or hear sound

>>726070178
It's constantly boiling, even in your bladder.

>>726068232
That's supposed to be a downside?

>>726070191
You can't hear sound or see colours anymore.

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I would just go visit s.n,a.p.c.h,a,t,y(,)me to share local sluts nudes.

>>726070100
the phone will transmit you thoughts

>>726069800
You learn that the Trix rabbit never actually liked Trix in the first place, he was just putting on a show for the kids all those years.

>>726070278
>>726070294
>>726070357
hive mind

>>726070326
Kek

>>726070326
It is if you're not a fan of prison

I guess a secondary superpower would be that niggers can't resist your ass

>>726070100
it's a zero percent and never charges

Fluent in every language

>>726070191
Green makes a constant REEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>726070492
*at

The power to read other people's thoughts.
>inb4 "they can only be read out loud"

>>726070504
Cant speak or write

>>726070145
>tfw you realize Ajax out of the Deadpool movie is just a man with a crippling nerve disease

>>726070504
we already did that one.

>>726067502
Time is sped up significantly for you, to the point that anyone and everyone you ever knew dies in what seems to be mere hours for you. You outlive humanity as a whole. In fact, you outlive the death of our solar system when the sun expands and devours the inner planets, and you end up left floating in space for eternity.

>>726070504
You are on the TSA's no fly list.

i can shit small gold nuggets
emphasis on small

>>726070533
You cannot turn it of or distinguish who's thinking what

>>726070533
They know you are reading their thoughts.

>>726070605
your toilet gets clogged.

>>726070533
Only when your tongue enters their anus

NSA FBI or can't track me

No laws affect you without your permission.

>>726070533
Can't think your own thoughts

>>726067717
You always wake up unable to walk straight, and always have a vague feeling you were raped the night before.

>>726070605
They're not small enough. Have fun.

>>726070605
Gold becomes worthless and they are spikey

>>726070533
you realize that you're the only one who doesn't think in binary

>>726070661
The CIA can

>>726070605

Nuggets are so small they're of negligible value, and the nuggets are buried in your actual shit. So you need to dig for them if you want them

>>726070661
The KGB is always tracking you

>>726070688
So he just wakes up extremely hungover and paranoid? That sounds like hell.

>>726069009
money will always spawn on top of whatever you're seeing at any given time, including the underside of your eyelids

>>726070729

Not much of a downside when the KGB doesn't exist anymore

No need for sleep

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Farts that melt steel beams!

>>726070699
That's scary. Like someone should make a horror/psych thriller about this

>>726070605
only after you swallow cum

>>726063183
i can manipulate the totality of reality with my mind.

>>726070818

You are unaware that you don't need sleep, so you sleep anyway to avoid the downsides of sleep deprivation

>>726070533
you automatically to print them out to the closest printer have to read them manually.

>>726070807
That's what they want you to think!

>>726070819
Your anus is not immune to your farts

>>726070819
Can't fart indoors or the building will collapse

>>726070874
It's all in your head and everyone thinks you're crazy

>>726070874
Already been done. Only realities you do not exist in.

>>726069831
He also leaves behind a distinct smell of sulfur at his departure and arrival.

The power to shoot spaghetti from my fingertips

>>726070894
wait so how do I know this isn't already the case

The power to be the best porn director in history

Never suffer any drawbacks from physical injury or harm.

>>726068595
Because you're a worm, not a human, your taxes are insanely high. Average is about 85-95% on everything with no tax returns.

>>726071043

You don't. That's the downside.
Try it out and get back to us

>>726063183
the ability to ejaculate at will

>>726071069
Only scat porn

>>726071036
Only works when your fingers are inside a vagina

>>726071069
You have the power but you can't use it

>>726071084
You can still die

>>726071036
It's raw

>>726071069
Only child porn

it was a good thread
but almost 404

>>726071095

You don't have the ability to stop ejaculating at will

>>726071036
it has to travel from your heart through your blood stream and finally out your finger tips
>>726071069
in north korea

>>726071121
Kek

>>726071155
If I fire them fast enough that could hurt

>>726071164
the ability to threads never 404

>>726071130
last I checked, dying is a drawback of physical harm.

>>726071069
your work isn't revered until after your dead

>>726068802
The government takes $13 from you for "taxes"

>>726071229
Invincibility doesn't imply immortality

>>726071095
Everytime you ejaculate, your penis gains an inch in length and loses 2 inches in girth

>>726071228
they 403 instead

>>726071228

Nobody posts in them

>>726071254
I can save/load my life to relive or retry past experiences.

the ability to start a new thread

>>726071420
Your save data can get corrupted randomly, changing your experience and situation drastically for the worse, irreversably

>>726071420
Only the bad experiences

>>726071425
You're on 4chan

>>726071425
you become a faggot

>>726071158
see:
>>726070326

>>726071582

see

>>726070484

The power to make other people shit themselves.

>>726071616
You shit yourself, too

>>726071616
Only if you shit with them

>>726071657
>>726071670
Fine I'll just sit on the toilet whenever I feel like using my power

>>726071716
Shitting into a toilet isn't shitting yourself.

>>726070765
Exactly

>>726071716
It only works in proximity

>>726066673
>he doesnt know what a sneeze is

>>726071616
they shit out the entire contents of your stomach and you become starving

>>726071698
>>726071698
>>726071698
>>726071698
>>726071698
New thread

>>726070819
Anything you ever watch or listen to is various family guy funny moments videos

Ability to make the world understand the difference between a fedora and a trilby.

>>726071616
You feel an irresistible compulsion to eat their shit

>>726071936

They continue to confuse the two anyway despite knowing the difference
>see your/you're

>>726071420
It's always, ALWAYS, that one fucking save that you made right before you lost a fight to a gang of third graders when you were 20

>>726071698

>>726071425
The new thread 404's faster than the original

>>726071785
*line of sight

Proximity could still be within the same building, per se

>>726072057
>>726071698