Waifu claiming thread.
Previous:>>725535158
The rules are very simple:
>claim your 2D waifu
>post pics of your waifu
>insult other waifus
>keep ERP and RP to a minimum
>discuss stuff
>post fitting, not over-sexualised content
>most important: Have fun!
Where did my trip go?
Claim
>>725544739
Don't encourage me!
>>725545074(Urakaze)
Thanks! Have you read Pandora Hearts?
>>725545514
Right there
>>725545074
Chinese and Vietnamese. I don't know how but sometimes people mistake me for a jap.
..
カラミチーマス
>>725544437 (Rem)
So you've got like an Asian spidey sense? Neat
>>725544739 (LoveAnon?)
>wriggling fuzzy live blanket
Well that went from cute to downright scary really fast...
>>725544767 ("that guy")
Have a good cry, sleep well and take care.
>>725545401 (Chara)
Nights Chara
>>725545479
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-SYkQkTO-k&t
Claiming and going to bed, good night everyone!
>>725545568
A lot of people think all Chinks look the same
clam
>>725537284
She has hands. I'm pretty sure. Taiga is always cute
>RAWWWRR
Lucoa
>>725545644
taiga a cute
still here
>>725545764
>RAWWWWRR
Now slep for real
>>725545644
Night.
>>725545565
Were you trying to hide it from me?
Claiming best girl
Got to stage 4 boss's last phase on normal in Danmaku Unlimited 3. Progress!
Does it get any fucking sadder than this?
>>725545565
give those animals some love!
>>725545644
just imagine laying down and having a dozen cats snuggling up to you! goodnight!
>>725545672
hello hello miss clam!
>>725545899
hello miss Smug!
>>725546073
It's only because Maya is still out on expedition for another 33 hours
>>725546191
>just imagine laying down and having a dozen cats snuggling up to you! goodnight!
That would be healthy too! Did you know cat's purring heals bones?
>>725546191
Hi
>he watches anime
>he pretends to be in a relationship with a drawing of a prepubescent girl
>he's older than 7
>>725546066
Goodnight tiger.
>>725545644
goodnight
>>725545644
Sometimes I'm wrong, and I'm unusually wrong when it comes it Thai and Philipino people
>>725545650
Course you'd know that.
>>725546141
>normal
Might as well kys
>being a virgin after you graduate high school
Claim
>>725542549
Hi
I don't know
>>725546502
I got to stage 5 boss on easy!
>>725546502
Yeah I would, no back to the rice fields, Charlie
>>725546621
hi
what was it about?
How's everyone?
>>725546953
Feeling good because of >>725546141
How's you?
>>725546348
animals are the best!
>>725546379
hello hello are you well <3
>>725546587
there's no reason to feel bad about that, anon! I'm sure we can all pitch in and hire you a prostitute <3
>>725546953
hello hello miss Yuuki! how are you today?
>>725547023
hello miss Saber! are you well?
>>725546218
Wowie, what expedition is that? I don't think I got to any that long.
Hey, I totally wasn't rejected today
Also got to shoot 24 grenades out of a grenade launcher
>>725547061
Because of...?
>>725547128
Can't complain, going to hang out with my brother later. It's been a lazy Tuesday for me. Yourself?
just installed my godan keyboard.
Its a little tricky.
こばんわ, あのん-くん!
>>725545565
Not much but Arisu is my favorite character
>using a Godan Keyboard is really hard, sorry for any typos and stuff
>but at least I can set Urakaze as the keyboard background!
>>725545568
My friend Rose is vietnamese and she's super nice!
>>725546384
I do not think Urakaze is prepubescent...
>>725546648
>insert easy mode insult
>where's that video
>here
>https://youtu.be/Kc8GNaED3Ok
>skip to 0:50
>>725546708
I'm done harvesting for the day, Cracker.
>>725547128
ehh
>>725547190
so it evens out?
>>725547128
tfw ignored
>>725547201
25. I need to get to 31
>>725547234
As you may have guess, Arisu is also my favourite. She really struck a cord with me
>Godan Keyboard
That thing looks like misery incarnate
I actually got Urakaze from the past event
>>725547128
Nono, you got that wrong. Cats are the best!
>>725547201
Because of: >>725546141
>Got to stage 4 boss's last phase on normal in Danmaku Unlimited 3. Progress!
>>725547277
Are you good at bullet hell games?
>>725547201
I'm well! I spent all day with nice people here! thank you for asking <3
>>725547286
ehh sounds the same as normal
not where I want it, but at least it doesn't suck <3
>>725547364
hello anon <3 I love you the most!
>>725547190
That's a pretty extreme reaction to rejection
>>725547277
Cracker has to be the least offensive slur ever
Granted it doesn't have roots in persecution like almost every other one
>>725546869
Hi
Idk, some people with guns and stuff
>>725545416
>>725547502
cats are tied for the best animal!
>>725547541
Yeah
>>725547190
>grenades
Dont lie, they were potatoes.
Because real grenades are valuable! In fact, they are worth a lot more than you are!
Or so Commissar Letlev said.
>>725547190
24 chances to kill yourself and you failed them all.
>>725547660
Tied with lions and tigers!
I'm new to 4chan and I don't have a waifu, but I love some of the music I've started finding in this threads every now and then. Ohayou Gozaimasu!
>>725547502
Nice, what's Danmaku?
>>725547541
Solid! I'm not looking forward to tomorrow, I gotta go to the DMV and get my license renewed...
>>725547234
Remember to type in kanji when applicable. Rose is assumably short.
>>725547502
I'm better than most people.
>mfw people think games like Undertale is bullet hell
>>725547559
What am I supposed to call you then? A communist faggot?
>>725547808
Here's one
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnEOeE9zHU8
>>725547809
Danmaku means "bullet hell".
Danmaku Unlimited 3 is a bullet hell/shoot 'em up game.
>>725547917
Have you played DU3?
These have to be the gayest fucking threads ever
>>725548036
Gotcha, sounds fun. How's the difficulty?
>>725547711
I'm sending you an extra dose of love tonight <3
>>725547799
tied with horses! they're big dumb dogs that do funny things!
>>725547809
ah, that's a thing, isn't it? I need to check when mine is up!
>>725547808
just listen to all the stuff from lofi.hiphop, bsd.u, and people like in love with a ghost! eventually youtube gives you some nifty chill recs!
>>725548064
I love you anon!
>>725547917
But I'm not a commie, Ya fuckin' gook
>>725548064
I think Trap threads have us beat
>>725548108
Played it about 5h so far and still haven't beaten it. On easy mode I've got to 5th boss, which I think is the final boss.
>>725548036
Danmaku looks easier than most bullet hells I've seen
>have you ever seen people run Flandre Scarlet on ultra extra
>>725548260
Too bad, you are now.
>>725548189
Thanks but i will be fine.
>>725548064
say it to my face not online see what happens
unsheathes Yamato
>>725548260
they dont have cybersex in trap threads.
>>725547286
I'd say it does. Was pretty fun. Only problem being they were dummy ammo so they didn't explode
>>725547559
What can I say, I'm an extreme bote :^)
>>725547729
But I got to throw 3 real grenades 3 weeks ago.
>>725547750
Miku pls
No need to hurt me further :^(
>>725548189
Yup, so that'll be my day tomorrow unfortunately. On the plus side my birthday is Thursday so I'll be partying it up!
>>725548312
Huh, I'll have to look into it
>>725547729
Ayyyyy Call of Duty 2
"But Comrade Comissar, these are potatoes!"
>>725548418
and so will mister Duke, and so will Mash, and so will everyone else, I know
but just because you guys say that doesn't mean that I'm not going to worry about you guys.
>>725548679
That depends on how you define fine
>>725547921
Thanks a lot! : )
I'll leave a little something for you too, Electronica with a bit of Indie Rock on top: https://soundcloud.com/thebandinheaven/dandelion-wine-magic-shoes-wav
>>725547641
hi
sounds cool
did you like it?
>not filtering threads you dislike
>not autism
makes you think
>>725548597
lies
commissar letlev would give you potato and tell you how grenades are more valuable than you
>>725548672
Because real grenades are valuable! In fact, they are worth a lot more than you are!
>>725548378
Better dead than red
>>725548597
But 24 grenades?
I'd think she'd get the idea after the first one
>>725548189
Hmm, I don't know. Horses are definitely way higher than dogs, but not as cool cats.
>>725548378
I haven't.
Not really looking for the hardest bullet hell game since I suck anyways.
>>725548647
It has quickly become one of my favourites.
>>725548597
All will be fine once I hit the limit where it's not possible to hurt further.
>>725548759
it's not the fine I want for you people. I want you all well.
>>725549140
have you met any? they're great animals <3
>>725549018
I OVERREACTED, ALRIGHT
>>725549223
What if you never hit the limit? Would this go on forever
>>725548816
Hi
I did
>>725549295
I have, but never ridden one.
>>725549295
>it's not the fine I want for you people
What do you mean
>>725549513
Calm down, I don't need any grenades in my window
>>725549140
Just looked it up, it doesn't look like a game I'd enjoy
>>725549018
I don't really understand that but okay.
>>725549140
It's one of the game modes where you literally can't play it without losing a life.
>>725549518
hi
did you watch it with your boyfriend?
>>725549703
they're just really weird animals. they make weird faces, they scratch their necks on whatever they find, they'll randomly drop to the ground and roll...
>>725549714
it just feels like sometimes you guys are okay with "eh". I want you guys to get a good place and be happy <3
>>725549513
You're free to block me any time, but I know how much my little pet needs me.
>>725550242
"Eh" is usually a step up from how I usually feel, actually
>>725550282
OwO
What's this?
>>725550150
Hi
I don't have a boyfriend
>>725549967
Yeah, bullet hells aren't really for everyone. They can be very relaxing and almost meditative while requiring some intense concentration.
>>725550008
Yeaah, that's way too hard for me.
>>725550242
I've never seen a horse do that.
>>725550346
Cancer tbh.
>>725549929
I was ordered to shoot
>>725550282
I never agreed to these terms tho
Not yet
But shh
>>725550651
Nice, me too
>>725550510
hi
then why is someone jealous that you're my muffin -_-
>>725550565
Dark Souls is like that for me
>>725550346
I see
that makes me sad, sort of
I wish I could do something to help
>>725550008
It means I'm no commie
>>725550743
>Needing orders to shoot
>>725550867
Can't help people who don't help themselves
>>725550764
Hi
Idk, ask him -_-
>>725551028
can wish that you'd let others in to help you, though.
I'm here if you ever need to talk, friend.
>>725550802
I don't really feel like dark souls require that much concentration tbh and it can be frustrating if you die twice while carrying lots of souls.
>>725546145
>>725551178
I guess I'll try to keep that in mind.
>>725545786
>tfw no dragon thicc waifu
La vida es un camino lleno de dolor y sufrimiento.
>>725551212
Boss fights require concentration for me, but regular enemies not so much.
>>725551336
I'm sure someone from miss Alice's threads or the shrines would be open to listening as well, if you're more comfortable discussing things with them <3
>>725551539
I don't really discuss it much.
>>725551359
exactly
>>725551046
hi
ok I will
what games did you play?
>>725551452
Which DS is your favourite?
Anyone else really like Katanagatari's art style?
>>725551621
Hi
Nfs underground 2
>>725551594
I guess like you said, there's only so much to do if you don't seek it out <3 I'll at least keep you in my thoughts
>>725552025
Yes
>>725551932
I've played and beaten 1, and I've played just a small amount of 2 (not a fan of it tbh.) I do want to try 3 though
>>725552039
hi
what car are you using?
>>725552352
Hi
Still the Toyota corolla
>>725552025
Yes, not the eyes though.
>>725552170
You really should give DS3 a try, it's the best one imo. DS2 is really bad though and not really even worth playing.
Is everyone dead or something?
>>725553083
Nah
>>725553083
>>725552541
hi
nice car by the way
I didn't realize how cool the 86 were when I was playing back then
>>725553083
Only on the inside
>>725553083
I wish i was
>>725553287
Hi
I liked it because of the pop up lights before i knew what the car was
>>725553279
The lewd is a manifestation of the mind!
>>725553515
That is the best place to be dead in all honesty
>>725553240
I just assume you are some sort of zombie that is actually dead but able to lurk the threads 24/7
>>725550282
>>725550743
Intriguing development
I wonder how far this will go
>>725553683
Im not and I cant
>>725553623
hi
I liked pop up lights too
That's why I used the rx7
>>725553787
Not far enough
>>725554236
>rx7
An oversized Miata?
>>725553683
A SNEK!
>>725554236
Hi
I don't remember which car i used first
>>725553683
I dunno, being dead on both sides sounds pretty neat
>>725554658
Hey Tomoyo!
RAAAGGGHHHHHHHH
>>725554527
no not really
>>725554658
hi
I used the civic for a very long time
Turns out I'm everything but a civic enthusiast now
I awaken from a terrible nightmare around 8pm, the usual hour in which my slumber comes to a halt, albeit somewhat earlier. I obviously have a productive time ahead of me, being up at this hour. I turn myself over and kiss my Waifu pillow, landing my lips on a spot deprived of my dried-up ejaculate. As per usual, I begin to whine and scream for my mother. I require a nurtrituous meal of Tyson brand frozen chicken nuggets and Mountain Dew, and based on the smell emanating from my size 42 adult diaper, I will also need a change. I use what little energy I have to push my buzz lightyear bedsheets off, and roll myself out of bed, crushing several piss bottles in the process. Luckily, I can kill two birds with one stone by taking my biweekly shower tonight, so I can wash off the piss and also gain 10 big boy points from mommy. I waddle over to the bulletin board, and a smirk begins to form on my face as I realize I have acquired 100 big boy points, enough for a new anime body pillow. I plop 320 pound ass on to my computer chair, causing the shit in my adult diaper to spill out on the basement floor beneath me. I brush the roaches off of my LED lit mechanical keyboard and load up 4chan. As soon as I load up the latest "waitu claiming thread", mother walks down to the basement
Part 1
i claim super sonico
>>725555003
?
>>725555226
Hi
What's your favourite car irl?
>>725555369
She strategically maneuvers herself through the maze of piss bottles and shit jugs until she makes it to my desk. I am her precious son, earning so many big boy points I could be on the NASDAQ. She bows before me and presents tonights meal. It isn't what I was expecting, on the tray sits a great value paper plate, adorned with Tostitos Pizza rolls and a red solo cup of Dr. Pepper. Anger swells within me, causing my face to turn red. I twist my cheeto stained neckbeard hair and ponder what her consequence will be for this disappointment. I decide to drop it, as the meal will suffice. I brush a group of roaches off of my monitor and browse the latest Waifu claiming thread, and remind her to leave her credit card so I can order another body pillow to spray my seed upon. I turn around and see her grabbing my beloved Miku pillow, I become overwhelmed with rage, I stand up from my computer chair and begin to approach her. Suddenly, I trip over 2 liter of Mountain Dew that I filled with piss last year, and my fat, unshowered body crashes into the basement floor beneath me. It seemed to happen in slow motion. I hear the "crunch" roaches crushed under my man boobs. I happened to fall in a particular spot where I keep most of my shit jugs and piss bottles. I am completely soaked in old piss and shit
Pt 2
>>725555496
I gaze down upon my body. I am completely naked expect for my adult diaper, the content of which has been emptied onto my thighs and back. My stomach extends forward so much I cannot see my feet, and my man tits so far I can barely see my stomach. I see the layer of shit, piss, and dead roaches as armor, and imagine myself as a hero in one of my favorite animes. I am trying to save my princess, my Miku body pillow mother is trying to capture. I must save her, she is my only instrument to combat my eternal virginity. I charge at mother, and collide with her, sending her crumbling down onto my mattress. She vomits immediately, because she knows she's lying upon millions of her unborn grand children, in the form of my semen absorbed into my buzz lightyear bedsheets. I lay on top of her, burying her face between my shit-covered man breasts. I pull myself away, and laugh as notice some of the dead roaches have stuck to the shit on her face. I reclaim my previous body pillow and kiss her up and down. I then proceed to expose my tiny Phallus and masturbate onto her, as a display of my power should her or my mother rebel against me once more
Pt 3, I'm writing these as I go
>>725555643
Mother retreats upstairs. I squint my eyes and hiss at the sliver of light creeping in from the basement door. I haven't been to the other parts of the house since last Christmas, when mom told me I had to socialize with the family or get my computer taken away. I imagine my house as a video game map, and think the rest of my house as The Unknown Lands. I also like to imagine my room a castle. I haven't been outside since I was 16, which was about 6 years ago. I live in complete darkness, except for my computer screen, which is always displaying the current Waifu claiming thread. Thinking of last Christmas makes me sweat and feel anxious, I never want to leave my castle. I remember walking up the steps. And trying to adjust my eyes to light. Mother made me wear a red Christmas sweater and some sweat pants. I walked into the living room where my normie family members were talking and doing things on their iPhones. I tried to convince them that computers are superior technology and only normies use phones, but they wouldn't listen. My little cousin asked my why I had so many stains on my sweat pants, and I realized these were the ones I masturbated on before mommy bough my first body pillow. I waddled back down to my castle and haven't left since.
Pt 4
>>725555496
Is this tali's wife?
>>725555754
I despise my family of normies, in fact I hate everyone who isn't part of the Waifu community. The only person free of my hatred is my mother. She's taken care of me for the past 22 years, and supplies me with food and diaper changes. It is now 10 pm, and I'm still soaked in my own shit and piss. Whatever, I've smelled worse than this before. I sit down at me desk, brush some roaches away from my mousepad, and refresh the current Waifu thread. Just as i begin to select my image of Miku to claim, I feel something move between my ankles. I see a big rat crawling beneath me. This will make an exquisite gift for my Waifu body pillow. I grab him by the tail, and suffocate him between my man breasts. I then throw him on to my bed, to appease Miku. I can hear mother yelling upstairs, in between sobs and crying. Probably on her normie iPhone talking to one of her newfag friends about me. All of this excitement makes my bowels loose, so I grab the nearest empty 2 liter of soda, remove my size 42 adult diaper, and like my asshole up with the opening. I squeeze out enough pizza roll liquid shit to fill up 1/4 of the container. I place it next to a pile of dead roaches and look back at my computer screen
Pt 5
>>725555369
>>725555496
>>725555643
>>725555754
Can't get enough can't ya?
Faggot
-is terrified by all the snew and hides behind the chair- :<
>>725555475
hi
that's very hard for me to pick
I really like s14 drift cars and foxbody drag cars
The new corvettes are pretty sweet overall, if I had to pick a new car
>>725555496
bushy brows
Hello everyone, good to see the thread is already full of spam
>Juvia claimed
Pic my gf took of me... What kind of pics do y'all cartoon wives take of you?
>>725556305
Spam your lewds
>>725556364
If i'd guess, ones where I'm a productive member of society
>>725556167
How much is it?
>>725556469
Productive? What are you producing? Impotent semen all over your gaming keyboard as you watch Asian cartoons marketed towards children? Kek
>>725556635
Actually money because of taxes, but close
>>725556364
Totally not incriminating in any way
>>725555392
are you kidding? youre gonna claim sonico as your waifu, and you dont even keep a picture of her available? idk about this
>>725556364
I'm going to work up a tribute real quick
>>725556229
Hi
They're all look good
>>725556469
No lewding
>>725557225
More like no fun
>>725556591
-points out the window, is two and a half feet- ;_;
>>725557200
hi
Just like your 0s by the way
Your favorite would be the R34 if I remember well, right?
>>725557332
Jeez that is a lot. Stay warm.
>>725557438
Hi
Either that or the AE86
I'm going to bed now
>>725556730
rekt
>inb4 weebs and autism for the 100th time
>>725557686
weebs and autism for the 100th time
my name jeff
>>725557587
hi
Very nice taste
goodnight muffin
>>725557330
Juvia's lewds are for my eyes only
>
>>725557439
Mugi
>>725557488
-shivers under a blanket- ;.;
>>725556730
So you make money because other people pay taxes? HAHAHAHAH
>>725556739
>being so sheltered that you think an anonymous picture on an anonymous image board full of sexually frustated man babies of a guy holding a half ounce of weed is incriminating
Go out into the world man holy fuck
My whole stache from last week. Is this incriminating?? Kek
>>725558394
Just saying
>>725558272
Anon
>>725558394
nice b8 m8
is someone feeling a little attention needy tonight?
>>725558533
What does a vagina feel like? Some sort of tube?
>>725558340
Maybe get a pet to warm you?
>>725558606
Have you ever felt a vagina before?
>>725557962
Are they really?
>>725558394
Denial huh?
Well it is the crux of your "Arguments"
>>725558621
-makes a sour little face...all the traitorous kitties are upstairs on the bed- >: |
>>725558856
Go to them?
>>725558950
-is no computer upstairs...nu 4chans or music lessons and no comfy chairs- ;.;
>>725559102
Bring the cats to you?
>>725559176
-has been calling them. They know it's cold and look at him like he's a jerk for even suggesting they move fromt heir warm spot- ;.;
Incrimination
dude weed
>>725557488
Do you get snow where you live?
>>725559542
dude lololol weebs xd
>>725558802
Yes they are!
Lewd your own waifu!
someone email me ;-;
>>725559343
Oh. Im sorry
>>725559575
Every now and again during winter.
>>725559605
Found the Virgin
>>725559687
No U
>>725559727
How about I message you on AIM
Goodnight
>>725559888
nice trips, but what is AIM?
mein waifu
>>725560004
goodnight ti bato
>>725559888
sorry, only got YIM.
>>725560004
forsen1
>>725559727
check your private 4chan inbox
How long does it usually take randomarchiv to archive a thread?
>>725559886
dude weed xd 420
>>725560262
Here he goes again on an autistic adventure to try and punish his big bad internet bully
>>725560381
Sheltered weeb who has never smoked before and automatically assumes anyone who doesn't sit in there room and beat off to cartoons all day is a douche bag
>>725560450
but! but!
he's not mad!
he's definitely out-trolling the shitposter!
>>725560032
AOL
Instant
Messager
A very dead message system
>>725560188
I don't...
Hit me up on Myspace, we can chat there
>>725560627
>>725559886
>>725559361
>>725558606
>>725558394
>>725556635
>>725556364
>not a douche bag
>not atutim
>not trying too hard
0/10
>there are people in this world who pretend to be/date a preteen cartoon character
>The Universe's face when
Oyasumi
>your son converses with sweaty man children on the internet every night by using suggestive drawings of 11 year old girls with pink hair from Japanese kids shows
>your dad (and entire ancestry)'s face when
>>725561064
>The Universe's face when
>The Universe's face
>The Universe
>The face of UNIVERSE!
Here comes the butt hurt weebs with their damage control!
>>725559888
>t-trips
No, Juvia is pure, she can't be lewd
so anywho, is anyone still here? or did you all
head off to some chat place?
>>725561798
hello
>>725561730
I don't want to see them anyway
>>725561888
guten abend!
>>725555555
>>725561999
i'm sorry I don't know what that means
but nice trips
>>725562139
thanks, and it means good evening
>>725562267
oh ok
good evening to you too
new thread when?