Creep the cashier out faggot. >tissues, lotion, frozen

Spade, bin bags, air conditioner

Pack of Magic The Gathering cards
Pack of YuGiOh cards
Pack of Pokémon cards

freshly cooked niggers, a whip and a cucumber.

>>725390133
>three packs of hot dogs, latex gloves, tub of crisco, g-string and a ballpeen hammer

>>725390133
Large black plastic bags, large kitchen knife, rope, desinfectant, saw, playboy magazine, lighter liquid, plastic gloves and condoms

>>725390133
Idk what they do and do not sell at walmart, from what i've seen it's just about everything.
>garbage bags, shovel, paracetamol

>>725390654
THREE items

ITT: Niggers that cannot into 3

>>725390133
>I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
>I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
>Butter

>>725390717
Fuck me, how many of you went to the store?

condoms, astroglide and a baby doll???
once bought baking soda for heart burn some hot dogs and tin foil once in flordia and the clerk was like you sure you want to buy this stuff i was like ya im camping and then she said it looked as if i was gonna smoke some crack, which in the end was my end game, but they really do pay attention to what you getting

>>725390754
Dammit anon...
1 pack of hot dogs, tub of crisco, ballpeen hammer

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>>725390870

>>725390870
Stole from reddit you faggot

>Cinderella costume, biggest bottle of hot sauce, box of tampons

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Electric chainsaw, muriatic acid from plumbing section, giant bag of candy.

>>725390133
why would you freeze a coloring book?

A large bottle of lube, muscle relaxers, and a barbie doll

>>725390133
spray cheeze, most realistic humanoid plush I can find, the confederate flag

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>>725391901

>>725390133
>5qts of 75w-90 oil
>braided rope
>condoms (smallest available)

>>725391901
You fucking dope. Elsa.

I'm a cashier and I had a fat nigger lady in my line buy way over 20 douches and hemroid cream. I internally kekd my ass off

>>725390133
lube, cucumber and a porn magazine

>>725392217
3 items....that's 7

>>725390133
>Razor blades
>Reciprocating saw
>Cucumbers
>Lubricant
>Condoms
>Coveralls
>Various childrens' DVDs.
>Lingerie, smallest size available

>>725390572
Ok Jesse Pinkman

>>725392491
>what's a 3

>>725392354
You can buy a 5qt container of oil to mong. It's in every walmart/autoparts store

Don't tell me you actually walk in there and grab a handful of 1qts and over pay by some retarded amount.

>>725392354
Oil comes in 5qt jugs you fucking shoe

>>725392632
Hell, I never have to buy more than 1qt at a time. Forgot about the 5qt size tbh

>>725392268
>>725392094
couldn't help it... too easy

op never specified how many items
>box
>string
>stick
>bag of candy
>rope
>knife
>cooking oil
>various spices

>>725392770
You have never changed your own oil? Also you own a car that burns oil requiring you to add more?

Bought yesterday at Walmart

>carton magnum rubbers
>box of .40 cal
>whiteboard markers

>>725392852
>op never specified how many items
You're joking right?

>>725392880
For the extra $5, I pay a grease monkey to change it.
Yeah, my daily driver is a high mileage pos that requires a quart about every month and a half.

>>725392880
Probably has a bike or some kind of faggy euro car that only requires 1qt for its soda can sized engine

>>725392985
Some ppl don't know how the game works. They can't comprehend that fewer items cause more confusion

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>>725393104
>>725393211

>>725390133
take condoms to chasier pretend to not have enough money for them, tell her you will but them back and return to her with Plastic Wrap and Rubber Bands

Candy,frozen doll and rope and ask the cashier "do kids like these things"

>>725393211
>burns little fuel
>faggy euro car
Tell me about how everyone is impressed with your pickup anon.

So i was out shopping for a sports type travel bag, and found just the right one.
Large, pockets with zippers in all the right places, reinforced bottom, and God damn red all over.
Took it to the cashier and while she was pricing it, i took a look at my gf and said to her : "think the 7 year old will fit ? We're lucky it's red"
The look on the cashier's eyes was fucking priceless.

>>725390133
For the next party you have/go to, get your usual whiskey, vodka, rum etc...and pick up some baby food.

When you get to the register, pretend like you don't have enough and put the baby food back.

I'm never sure what's more effective, baby food or diapers. I got a really nasty look from this one nigger cashier the two times I did this. The other one didn't even blink.

>>725390870
>>I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
>>I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
>>Butter

When you get to the cashier tell them you're gonna leave 2 of the items there 'cuz it's not butter.

>>725390956
Think about it, that would fit in one or two large bags. Or are you asking if I have split personality? Which of course would be a bonus if they both came through at the cashier.

>>725393104
you trust some minimum wage fuckers of the street to change your oil? The guys the use air wrenches for everything thing and break off lug nuts and strip out oil pans , and they always found it that way? That is ballsy. I actually lost a car do to an oil change at Walmart...

>>725393756
>I actually lost a car do to an oil change at Walmart...

kek. he said do.

>>725393756
>lost a car do to an oil change at Walmart...

That's what you get for getting it done at Walmart. Fuck that.

All other work I do because labor costs a shit ton. But oil changes, meh, I go to reputable places that do just that. And before I even pull out I check the oil.

>>725393756
>I actually lost a car do to an oil change at Walmart...
How shit is your car?

Duct tape, hatchet, garbage bags.

>>725390133
Dog shock collar, Condoms, and baby formula

>>725394284
Shit...my Walmart doesn't sell shock collars :(

>>725393756
Why go to Walmart to do that? What the hell?

Just go to a local business, you will get better service and it might be a few bucks more expensive.

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>>725393653
you magnificent bastard

Box of condoms, tube of spermicide. When get to cashier, say you don't have enough, ask if they sell wire coat hangers.

>>725390133
large cucumber
magnum condoms
ky lubricant

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>>725391901

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>pringle can
>sponges
>latex gloves

I purchase cocksuck faggot

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>three items
>not going through self checkout

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>>725390133
Vaseline, a baseball bat, and Depends

>>725395088
>But say you don't want the chips, just the can

nuclear warhead, ICBM and a map of the white house

>>725390133
Hazmat suit, plastic lining, sorry for your loss card.

>>725395434
>nuclear warhead, ICBM and a map Reddit servers location

Fixed it for ya

>>725395060
>>725395294
They're taking Americans' jobs.

>>725390598
MTG is actually good. Smelly weebtards dont play MTG because its too complex and expensive for them. The ones that do are horrible at it.

I work at a walmart and none of these things would make me raise an eye.

>>725390133
>18 gallon tote x2
>Great Value™ Maximum Strength Drain Cleaner 2qt x20
>Microfiber Towel x5

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>>725395937
>>725392093
People actually order this shit?

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>>725395825
You're deluded.
This is literally the first image that pops up when you search "MTG tournament"

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>>725396713
This is literally the first image that pops up when you search "woman" and yet most don't look like this.
Really makes you think.

>>725396480
it's amazing you faggot

>>725391094
I've worked as a cashier, and I can honestly tell you I didn't give a single dusty fuck what you bought.
You get so zoned out after a couple hours of that bullshit, that it's all just a blurr of groceries and you're too tired to give a fuck.

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Weird food positions thread.
>me right now

>>725397050
Spot the ameriflap

>>725392852
>>725392491
you guys are unfunny roodypoo candyass homos

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>>725397013
It really doesn't.
You searched woman, you got a woman.
I searched for magic the gathering tournament, I got a fat neckbeard who went around posing with asscracks of fat people.
Google is working as intended.
MTG is for obese NEETs who doesn't otherwise have a social life that doesn't include a card game.

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Dog food, Rope, Condoms

>>725396480

Usually the cheddar and bacon ones, but I live in WI.

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>>725397013
Look at all these well-adjusted, physically fit and attractive people!
MTG is for the cool kids now.

>>725394573
wut?

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>>725397211
>all cashiers have been working for multiple hours when its your turn

Does anyone actually do this in real life? I bet the cashiers are too used to it or too apathetic to care.

>>725390133
>Box of spoons
>Box of forks
>Box of sporks

>>725390133
>lotion
You do know they sell actual sex lubes at Walmart, right?

>>725397233
I thought I was the only one. Bless your soul based anon.

>>725397950

>1-2pm
>9-10pm
>5-6am

Anyone doing full shifts is usually towards the end of their shift at these hours.

Alcohol, alcohol and nappies. Only I bring just enough money for the alcohol so I put back the nappies.

>>725390754
pregnancy test, hammer, trash bags

>>725391685
why did the giant bag of candy make me laugh

>>725399980
Disposing of bodies requires a lot of caloric intake

>pregnancy test
>wire coathangers
>beer

>>725401183
See>>725394803

A doll and baby wipes and a can of coffee I realy did this. I needed tho thongs and not for any thing weard the cash register give me a fucked up look

>>725392852
r u pullin my leg govna

>>725399379
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA the cashier will think your gf may be preggo, you're nailing Ikea furniture together and occasionally put things in the trash for the garbage man to collect

>this whole thread