Tried doing research online about the quickest way to kill yourself,

Reasons to become an hero, cant greentext.

>>725001624
Bullet to brain

>>725001624
guillotine is scientifically the fastest AND painless. A logistical challenge to acquire one, tho.

>>725001882
Ive thought about that but considering Im a commiefornia faggot I have no experience with guns and would probably fuck up and shoot my dick off.

>>725002026
sounds do-able could probably assemble one.

if there aren't any buildings or power lines nearby, a noose on the door handle would be easiest

>>725002228
seems like it would take to long. Guillotine anon still seems like the best answer.

dont do it

>>725001624
jump in front of a train

Eat an entire onion and swallow a shot of vinegar, instantly stop the heart and brain

>>725004155
Bad idea. A family acquaintance who works in prosthetics told me that a girl arrived to him w/o legs as a result of jumping in front of a train. Can't remember the specifics but she survived perfectly well despite the 360° and wheeling away.

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Go to train station. Wait for train to come and when it gets close, jump down onto the tracks and positon your head onto the tracks

>>725004430
You're about as retarded as that girl.

>>725001624
Tips to an hero:

1: be a hero
2: become a criminal
3: complete a mission
4: ???
5: profit

>>725004613
Autistic? Yes. Retarded? Hardly.

>>725002081
just one more way of saying you are a coward

>>725002173
lol dont go around assembling home made guillotines
thats not how you kill yourself
thats how you become a vegetable cause you're gonna do it wrong

>>725004272
really?

>>725002173
chances are, you can't, infact the reason they stopped using them is because of failed execution attempts, the guillotine is not just an execution its an art.

>>725001624
quick ans snappy, figure a way out to break your neck

>jump off a building

>>725004959
Yea that's how my uncle did it. Something about the interaction between the chemicals and the bodies natural response to it. It's painless. Not much research done on it.

> sell assets (you wont need them where you're going)
> go to Carmax and buy a fast car for whatever $ you have (like an old Corvette)
> highway, max speed min 130mph
> crash into overpass wall.
> boom done. painless but thrilling.

Options depending on how much you hate yourself and your parents:
> wear women's clothing
> have a dildo in the car
> printed pictures of kids in the car
> spread gas around the inside or outside of car and set on fire before you crash.

You get the idea.

find something in your own style and own voice. say what you want to say.

>>725001624
You see probably one of these threads a day on /b/. I'm curious as to how many actually go through with it.
Honestly though, don't kill yourself. Life gets better, and if you're stuck somewhere, a better way to go would be to just drive, bike, or walk away with a bag full of food or some shit. Travel the world with literally nothing to your name. See how free you feel.

But, if you still feel like you should do it, you should commit your suicide in as public a manner as possible and scratch /B/ on your chest or draw it in sharpie or something if you're REALLY going to do it, just to help with statistics.

But don't do it.

I always thought suicide was stupid. I mean, wouldn't you just want to sell your stuff and start a new life somewhere else away from the drama?

>>725005312
the perils of anonymous posting. I guess we'll never know if OP snuffs it.

>>725002026
The brain keeps living for a few minutes after it's severed, dunk-ass. If anything, decapitation is one of the worst ways to go.

>>725005494
this is some pretty solid advice. why not?

>>725005494
>>725005312

this

Not sure if this is "quick" but it will feel like it. Down a bottle of a 1.75 liter bottle of vodka (get a flavored one if you're pussy). You won't wake up.

>>725005505
you dont know that at all. Cite a study of dead people and the pain they felt. lol

one of the fucked up things about living - most every life form has a horrific and painful death. dying in a hospital on morphine is a new thing to life. most get eaten by something else, drown, burned, infection, parasites, etc.

>>725005791
>dying in a hospital on morphine

Not a bad idea, ask your local hospital if they can do that for you. If not, they'll probably help you lose the desire for suicide.

>>725005791
>>725005505
>>725002026

http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/human-brain/10-brain-myths6.htm

you're all wrong

>>725005494
There was some dude that said you can just get a one way ticket to Australia and make enough to live by picking fruit on farms. I guess they don't have Mexicans.

>>725005603

As someone with a high tolerance for alcohol this wouldn't kill me. Make me ill and feel like shit for sure but it wouldn't end me. It would probably kill smaller folks with no alcohol tolerance though if you downed it quickly but trust it would be a horrific way to go. Alcohol poisoning SUCKS and a fatal dose would I imagine be incredibly painful and drawn out.

Don't kill yourself. Live life out and treat it like a video game where you improve the part of your life that interest you the most.

Do fentanyl / U44700 overdose, you'll feel really happy before you die

>>725006034
Yep, that's what all the backpackers do over here.

Why not carbon monoxide?

>>725006486
What? For real?

So if I wanted an extended working-vacation I could just go to Australia and pick fruit? How does that even work? You just walk onto a plantation nigga style and ask for a job?

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>>725006028
ok so I read that and it makes me even more scared about how horrific death is. 30 seconds after head cut off? F dat

my preferred method has to be: shotgun to the head point blank range.

Consciousness and pain don't exist if there is not brain to feel them in. Pic related was lucky AF.

>>725001624
step out on train track before train comes simples

>>725006759
Did you read the full thing, it's actually only 2-3 seconds. Still though, I wouldn't want that.

>>725006759
shotgun?
you mean many very small pellets that go in random directions?
dude, what if they happen to go in just the wrong directly so you happen to feel the worst pain imaginable before death?
WORSE, what if you live?

The best way to go is to be down for the count, pumped full of drugs. Preferably asleep. Maybe OD on tranquilizers or be anesthetized.

>>725007003
>random directions
you understand the concept of point blank range right?

>>725007003
your entire head would be spread out on the ground in < 1 second. don't worry about pellets.

that being said, the drug option is a very good one.

especially if there was like a DJ of drugs - would start you off euphoric, then go to numb, then out.

DJ Kevorkian in other words.

>>725007251
Point blank is easy enough to understand
it's the small spread at point blank range that worries me and the fact that the pellets bounce around the inside if your skull

>>725007260
hell yeah

>>725006669
I've never picked fruit here becasue i live here but its big for the backpackers. They can move around australia following the harvesting times in different states

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>>725007885
>bounce around the inside if your skull
as a reference, the top part of this

>>725007935
I tell i lie. I picked cherries between jobs once for a few weeks. Payed about $80-100 a day from memory, depends on fruit prices and how much gets picked in a day between the group

>>725008115
>magnum
>shotgun

>>>>>hmmm these are the same things
ISHYGDDT
SHIGGY
SHIGGY DIGGY DOO

>>725001624
Quickest? Having 5 tons of flax fall on you.

>>725008253
you're right. The powder in a shotgun shell far exceeds a .44 cartridge. meaning the shotgun is much more powerful.Which means you're wrong.

any NRA faggets on here able to confirm power at point blank between the two?

The top of your head would be missing from a shotgun. Plenty of pictures showing this. They are on here all the time

being blown up in a fighter plane dogfight has to be the best answer for how to go out in a blaze of glory.
not shot down with bullets, but a missile lock that blows your ass up in 0.01 seconds while you were in locked in intense mode.
sadly, none of us will get to experience the glory of death in combat.

Jump in front of a train or truck moving at high speed. Just make sure to make a webm of it so we can watch. oh wait yea you won't b around for that. If near NJ will film for science or whatnot

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>>725008941
or doggo at incredible high speed.

>>725009344
Is that one of those racing dogs people bet on?

>>725009489
yeah, you see them in movies about New Yorkers for some reason. Its a shame they capture them and make the race. PETA should get all over that

>>725004673
But it just takes me to the credits screen :(

>>725008559

>not even in the nra
HAHAHA what a newfriend, summerfag. Go back to gaiaonline, go back to habbo hotel. Go right back to 9gag. Go back to le reddit. Go back to neopets. Go back to yahooligans, you hooligan. Just go.

>>725009713
it's nice 2 see them in nature like that

>>725010816
He's right but 2 stupid 2 explain it. The powder used in shotgun shells burns alot faster that what's in a .44, and a 12ga has way more kinetic energy than a .44 but a .44 flys faster.

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>>725001624

Here you go