I discovered I had been abused during my childhood. If you suffer

>>724441975
How long have you been a tumblrina?

>>724441975

Does the number 8 and the letter K bothers you too?

I used to think that ghosts exist because they regularly visited my room to haunt me.

This was easier for my brain to accept than the reality that my father and brother regularly raped me

>>724442094

I'm very interested in this, because, while I don't have such memories, I did have nightmares and fears that sound similar, and I have reasons to believe I was drugged before taken advantage of.

Did you always remember this? When and how did you understand what the memory really was?

>>724442074
>8 and the letter K

I don't actually get that reference.

>>724442166
One day when he was drunk my father broke down crying and apologized for all what he done to me because he couldn't no longer stand seeing the broken, depressed and suicidal mess that I was.

Then more and more memories came back and I remember how I used to lay in bed and tell to myself that it didn't happen. That I just dreamed. That it wasn't real.

And I must have done this repressing so much that I actually had vivid memories of ghosts coming into my room. And whenver I thought of those horrible nights I could tell myself that it was just a dream because ghosts aren't real

It was like waking up from the matrix

>>724442413
Are you a boy or girl?
How old were you?
What do you remember?
Do you get turned on by it?
Share the story

>>724442203
88
KKK

>>724442413
>It was like waking up from the matrix

This. In my case, I remember 99% of the abuse, but it was explained to me as an accident, a joke, or not at all and I assumed it was normal. Mostly memories I stopped thinking about because there was nothing to it, until my fiancée pointed out it wasn't as normal as I seemed to think.

I started making a list of all the weird things in my childhood, and they're no longer coincidences.

Have you started therapy? You absolutely should. I did, for other reasons, and realised that I literally didn't see the weirdness in some of what people did or said.

>>724442649

Thanks. And no, I don't mind these at all.

I was abused but I THINK I grew up okay. I live in a 3rd world shithole so abuse is pretty much expected and tolerable because everybody does it. Though..
>can't remember my childhood
Yeah, I can barely piece together anything before I was 16. I'm 19 atm.

My aunt zipped up my dick when I was around 5. So hard and violently I had to go to the ER. Officially, she forgot to put underwear on me, and accidentally zipped me up.

For years afterwards, whenever my aunt and mother were together and I was there, they would make a reference to that event and laugh. I never realised the obvious until my fiancée, who was there the last time they did this, felt bad and realised something was off, but even then I was dismissive of it. I had grown up hearing that story and had maintained my kid point of view.

>>724443134

I thought I was OK too, but if you feel something is missing and that you can't ever truly feel happy, now you know why.

There's no excuse for abuse, third world or not. It happens a lot anywhere. It may just be more hidden in other places, if that.

What country are you in and do you have access to therapists?

>>724443208
Is this a meme referencing the *unzips dick* meme?

>>724443343

No, I don't even know that meme. Haven't been on 4chan much in ages.

Guys, is it normal that I remember being naked on my parents' bed and they tickled me to see my balls go up? They found that very funny.

I'm 100% positive this happened, and never realised it was perhaps inappropriate until I told my therapist.

>>724443208
Male abused by several females here too. Most of it blocked but started remembering some pretty violent nasty shit and weird shit a few years ago

>>724443620

How did the memories come back?

>>724443335
>can't ever feel happy
True true, I even found out parallels between myself and Schizoid Personality Disorder. If they abused me, they managed to break my brain.

>country and therapist
Malaysia, born and bread. I don't know anyone tbh. I used to talk about it with a friend but she's gone off to uni and we lost contact. Life goes on for me, anon.

>>724443819
>Schizoid Personality Disorder.

Friend, most likely you suffer from some form of dissociation or derealisation (or also depersonalisation), especially if you experience high anxiety and the likes.

Your brain isn't broken, on the contrary, you used some massively intense defense mechanism to save yourself from it all. Until you reached a point where you were safe from them. Now is the time to uncover the past and deal with it.

Do me and yourself a favour and read about narcissism and see whether you recognise your parents in it; it may not be obvious. Overt or covert narcs differ widely, and even then, you are used to adapt for your abusers, so you won't see the obviously wrong, even if you're smart.

Remember anything weird or odd apart from the acts?


>>724443819
>I don't know anyone tbh.

Any memories of your parents saying negative things about your friends? I know now my parents did all they could to keep me isolated for years.

>>724443674
Hospitalized break level shit. Talking about it too much makes me dissociate so just fill in the gaps with whatever

>>724442413
Not saying that I think you're lying, but memories ought to be taken with a grain of salt especially where a trauma supposedly occured. There was a huge scandal back in the late 90's of therapists attempting to use hypnosis and/or sodium pentathol to help people uncover repressed traumatic memories. It worked great at first until they started realizing that in many cases, these memories were false. The person's subconscious would believe, due to the use of 'leading' questions, that a traumatic event must have occured, and fabricated memories to match this. Aside from causing innocent people to be incarcerated, this left the individuals whose minds had fabricated the memories with all the PTSD and such that a trauma would cause, despite an actual trauma never occuring.

Again, I'm not saying I think you're lying or anything. Your story doest make it very clear how much of what your father did he actually confessed to, so if he or your brother actually admitted to doing all that then that's one thing. But if you only have a vague drunken apology to go off of, and the rest of these memories were "uncovered" on your own or with the help of some sort of therapist or psychologist, it might be possible that some of these uncovered memories, however earnestly real they may seem, might possibly just be fabrications of your mind. Just some food for thought.

>>724444188
>Not saying that I think you're lying, but memories ought to be taken with a grain of salt especially where a trauma supposedly occured. There was a huge scandal back in the late 90's of therapists attempting to use hypnosis

You're right, but in my case, and I'm not this anon, no hypnosis was used. I never even completely forgot those memories. I remember remembering them, for instance. In 99% of the cases, I never forgot at all, but had an innocent point of view on what had happened. The rest came back by just thinking about it.

In my case, I have two brothers and we all remember abuse. I even know for sure that I suffer from amnesia because my brother, whom I trust 100%, remembers showing me things I have zero memories of. Pictures of our parents in sex orgies. I'd not forget that if I saw it, or would I...

>>724444036
>narc parents
Haha, I find out about that term a few years ago and started putting all the pieces back together. They're pretty much covert narcs, especially my mom. Religion's a big thing here so she uses that shit on me and lo and behold, everyone else is pressuring me too.

>Friends
Nah, I guess "being" Schizoid just made me isolate myself from them. Started noticing it right after 12 when I finished grade school, I pretty much alienated myself. Did it again at 17 when I finished high school. I just.. ghost people as a defence mechanism.

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>>724444713
Sounds more like bpd friend, co morbidity is high with it though.

>>724444434
Well, the hypnosis-and-dtugs example was really just anecdotal. A mind doesn't necessarily need to be under the influence of those sorts of things in order to fabricate false memories, although the use of hypnosis and drugs can make it exponentially easier for situations like that to occur.

>>724444713
>Religion's a big thing here so she uses that shit on me and lo and behold, everyone else is pressuring me too.

I found out my parents lie to everyone about everyone else. They act religious to one of my brothers and atheistic to me, depending on our positions. When I defended the faith, they attacked it; when my brother attacked the faith, they acted like they were religious. They feed off drama and pain.


>Nah, I guess "being" Schizoid just made me isolate myself from them. Started noticing it right after 12 when I finished grade school, I pretty much alienated myself.

I did the same from 15 onwards, but even before that. By the time I was at university, I was socially isolated.

>>724444882
Never thought about BPD. I thought that's something you carry genetically. But then again Schizoid PD is also genetical, found the source through my grandma on dad's side.

>>724444882

Most abuse victims will exhibit traits of borderline, though not necessarily the actual disorder. Dissociation is part of the borderline array.

it's hard for me to show my mom affection.

she used to always touch my feet while i was in the bed and it pissed me off so badly one day that i kicked her when she tried to do it and she never did it again.

then i found out she was molested.

so who the fuck knows, i probably was abused as a child and don't remember it.

>>724445012
It's the most genetically inheritable they've found so far I think. Hope the reading up on it helps like it has for me.

>>724444982

In my case, my own memories are corroborated by my two brothers, and our abusers, even, for years after the fact. So yeah, I have every reason to believe in what I remember.

I know how memories can be unreliable, I've read studies on that, famous experiments and etc. But details don't matter when you remember your parents staring at your balls and laughing about how they go up and down when they tickle you.

>>724445010
>Social alienation
Does it get to you anon? Being all alone with no one. I did that for 6 months and I started seeing things at the corner of my eye. Literally going crazy from lack of social input eventhough my brain decided on itself that it wants to be alone.

OP is a faggot

>>724445012
>I thought that's something you carry genetically.

Experts agree that it's partly genetically, but in my opinion, only insofar as you can mentally resist, or not, the abuse done to you. I. e. the health of your brain bits. In that sense, it's genetical, but you won't get BPD unless you're abused in any sort of way. It's a defense mechanism kept into adulthood.

>>724445190
>she used to always touch my feet while i was in the bed

My brother was traumatised by a "nightmare" where someone sneaked into his room at night and violently shook him by the feet.

Ever since, he's been unable to sleep without doing "the tuck" to protect his feet.

>>724445250
>you remember your parents staring at your balls and laughing about how they go up and down when they tickle you.
>tickle
"tickle"

>>724445245
>It's the most genetically inheritable

That's a bit BS. It's heritable because if you have it and raise your kids with it, they will develop the same crap. That's how mental disorders carry on through generations. There probably is a genetic base, but that's not how this shit gets transmitted.

>>724445270
>Does it get to you anon?

Yes. I've lost my fiancée of 7 years over a story that I believe had everything to do with my abuse. (I may have become victim to a female narc and totally fell in love.)

But yes, loneliness drives me insane. Thankfully, my job forces me to interact with lots of humans, so that's good. My female narc works with me, though, that's less good.

>>724445613

Yeah, that's what scares me. I don't remember overt acts of sexual molestation beyond that. But I know for sure about dozens of covert acts.

>our parents planted weird objects in their bedroom for us kids to find

>all 3 kids somehow had the habit to raid their bedroom when they left
>what parents leave small kids alone for hours?
>each of us would find odd items, I found a whole suitcase of strange dildoes looking like evil fingers
>brother found a whole set of photos of our parents doing sex orgies covered in vaseline

I am sure now they baited us by saying, "Don't go to our room when we're gone!" That trick worked on me for the hot iron and on not blowing on my cocoa powder as it was sinking in my milk.

>>724445978
>closet pedos
They really wanted you and your bros to fuck mommy while daddy records everything while stroking his cock at such a sight.

>>724445978
>forced interaction
Yep. In uni now, meet lots of new people and now I'm not crazy anymore. Yay.

>>724446301

My brother is pretty sure our parents drugged his own children. They go after 2-year-olds. No obvious sign of obvious, but I don't dare imagine what they did to my niece.

>>724442094
Did you enjoy any of it? Any anal?

>>724441975
Sounds like you have autism

>>724446448
Even in their 60's? Kiddie fiddlers never stop fiddlin, huh? It's you and your bro's call anon, they're old and frail which means you guys hold the key to their survival. Send them away to a home or something.

>>724446553
>autism

Sounds like you don't know much about autism. Autists typically don't react to tickles because that requires a clear understanding that other people aren't oneself. Autists feel the same when they tickle themselves as when others tickle them.

Me, if you tickle me beyond my own control, I am liable to punch you in your fucking face.

>>724446608

I've considered going there with an alumimium baseball bat and finishing the job.

Fukcing agony aunt /b/ over here.. bunch of cunts

>>724441975
My mother used to molest me from the time I was an infant. She used to rub my penis in the bathtub when she was giving me a bath and say it was a game called "got your dickybird." One day I was in the tub with my little brother and she left us to answer the phone. When she got back she found me playing "got your dickybird" with my brother a flipped out. I was terrified because I didn't know what I had done wrong, and all she'd keep saying is that I knew, and that I was bad and evil. I was never allowed to bathe with my little brother again.

She was always finding reasons to touch me, like rubbing me head to toe with lotions and creams whenever I was sick or got a sunburn. I grew to dread haircuts because she'd cut my hair in the kitchen and use it as an excuse to push my face between her (very large) breasts and bat them from side to side, pushing me deeper ever time I tried to pull away.

One day when I was about 13 or so, I had just come in from mowing the lawn on a hot day and had my shirt off and was all covered in sweat. She came and sat down beside me and openly propositioned me. She asked me if I ever looked at her as a woman and not just my mother. I told her coldly that I barely saw her as human and she reacted like I had slapped her.

I went snooping in my parents room and found her stash of incest erotica eventually.

And no, before anyone asks, I never fucked her. Not to my knowledge, anyway.

>>724445250
Look, again, I'm not trying to say I think you're lying or making stuff up. I was just clarifying a point from my original post, because I didn't want any other potential reader to get the wrong impression that drugs or hypnosis was necessary for the mind to fabricate false memories.

>>724446714
Break-and-enter style! Don't make it personal anon, the feds will probably identify you on that. Good luck!

I don't need any "hints" that I might have been.
I remember it clearly. Friend of my grandfather fucked me several times a week for "candy money" when I was between 11-13 years old.
And I liked it. When I hit puberty (13) he had his way a couple times and I had my first orgasm and cum. Then he got busted.

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>>724446788

>>724441975
i was molested during childhood and idk, i kind of enjoyed it?

>learn about sex from an early age
>gain l33t skillz
>feel close to parents
>they stopped when i was 11
>still love my mom and dad

>>724447251
Uhm, you male or female?
How old was the creep?
How he got busted?
What kind of "sex" was it?

>>724447013
>all she'd keep saying is that I knew

These abusive parents are masters of projection and don't even know it. I fucking hate projection.

>dickybird

Fucking hell...

>she'd cut my hair in the kitchen

I think my mother once cut my hair badly on purpose. It was so fucking horrendous. I don't recall being touched by her, though, appropriately or not. I don't even remember hugs.

>. She asked me if I ever looked at her as a woman and not just my mother.

Fuuuuuuuuuuck...

> I told her coldly that I barely saw her as human and she reacted like I had slapped her.

Anon, you're a serious kind of badass. As my therapist would say, you have a lot of resources. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

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>>724447437
I'm a guy.
He was around 50 back then.
He got busted when my mother asked where I got all the candy and toys I kept buying. She figured I was stealing at first. But the truth came forward.
>What kind of "sex" was it?
Started with touching, quickly turned into oral (both on me and him) and then anal.
Still love anal sex, just like I loved it back then.
He was never violent.
>feel almost sorry for him, kek I'm probably damaged..

>>724447057

I actually stormed their home a day after I saw their real face. I went there to get my diaries back, since I learned they would search our rooms for such info (tough luck for them, I quickly wrote my shit in English, which they can't read). I had planned to just bust through and get what I wanted, and leave. Lucky for them, they weren't there.

>the dread once you revisit your childhood home with new perspective and burglarise your own childhood and teenage bedroom, anxiously fearing their return, because you aren't sure you'd leave them alive

>>724447251

Any sequels on you now?

>>724447689
........
>candy money
i got 600 each time when i was 13
hope you made good money

>>724447945
>hope you made good money

>I'll make myself believe I enjoyed it and the money was worth it so I don't have to face the devastating truth

Just because you liked it and weren't against it doesn't mean you weren't fooled and abused. It may even be worse.

>>724447832
Atta boy! You'll get the job done one way or another, anon. Pedo-fucks don't deserve to live.

>>724447902
Sequels?
Well he's still in jail (for other things as well)
I'm married with my wife that I love.
Just a little fucked up I guess.

>>724447294
That's not exactly common but also not really all that rare, either. If a kid is mature enough or whatever to handle exploring that kinda stuff then more power to him, you know? Unfortunately it's difficult for someone of that age to know whether it's something they can handle partaking in until it's too late. I also have to think that at least a portion of all the trauma and baggage that come from childhood sexual experiences isn't due, at least in part, to how they're told for the rest of their lives what a horrible thing it was for them to do that. Obviously if the kid can't handle that sort of thing happening then it can cause all sorts of trauma, don't get me wrong. But I wonder if some of those kids, much like yourself, didn't really make a big deal out of it when it happened, but because everyone made a big deal out of how bad it is for that sort of thing to occur, they start to internalize the notion that it was 'wrong' and that they should feel bad or wrong about it in retrospect.

>>724447945
I got like 150-200 Kronor (15-20 dollars) each time.
For a kid that was amazing back in the 80's.

>>724448178

Does your wife know?

>>724448017
you know the only thing worse than fucking old dudes?
being poor.

>>724441975
Why do fathers molest their sons? Are they actually legit repressed homosexuals or what? Someone explain pls

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>>724448253
femtikronor? whats that.

>>724448181

Faggot, my parents always made a small deal of everything sexual, and it turned out to have been abused from beginning to end. There is no reason to teach children about sex other than the parents' perversion. If you want them to get educated, you wait until they are older and give them a fucking book. You don't teach them anything yourself. Any healthy parent would realise how awkward anything else would be.

>>724448270
She knows, she was my friend (and their parents freinds with my parents) back then already so she was there when the cops came and my dad tried to kill the dude..
She understands, especially when I get periods of depression and stuff.
Makes my life easier.

>>724448314

For many, I suppose, the idea of having someone to victimise without limit is a turn on. I suspect some are more sadists than homos. My father enjoyed inflicting pain on me, more often psychologically than physically.

>>724448342
Swedish money. Or what?

>>724448382
I never said I endorsed molesting children dipshit. Try actually reading what I typed and comprehending it.

>>724448314
It's not about the sex, it's about forbidden fruit and having power over someone. Parents who molest their children have ready access to sex; they don't need to molest their children to get it. They molest their children because it's a rush to break the rules and they don't see their children as human beings, just sex toys.

>>724448382
>There is no reason to teach children about sex other than the parents' perversion. If you want them to get educated, you wait until they are older and give them a fucking book.
you are so wrong on so many levels

>>724441975
Faggot.

>>724441975
recovered memories are often false OP. Especially childhood abuse.
http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1111/1467-9280.00210
https://scholar.google.com/scholar?q=recovered+memories+of+abuse&btnG=&hl=en&as_sdt=0%2C5
You know, according to science at least.

>>724448382
>There is no reason to teach children about sex other than the parents' perversion. If you want them to get educated, you wait until they are older and give them a fucking book.
Dude fuck off. Early on sex education has reduced teenage pregnancies, std's and sexual abuse in plenty of places.
All Scandinavian countries start sex-ed around 3rd-4th grade.

>>724445570
How horrifying, gave me chills just thinking about it

>>724448181
well just cuz i enjoyed it, and milo had a good time, dont assume there's a "correct" or "right" way to molest kids. molesting kids is still bad even if a few of us "got lucky" in some small way.

>>724448405

Lucky you. My wife-to-be left shortly after I started understanding what my past had been.

>>724448314
sons are close enough sociologically speaking to 'female' or 'child' role.

a really common abuse tactic is
>put on this dress
>stand outside in teh cold

which is kinda telling in itself.

>>724448940
Sounds like she was a bitch.. It's during times like that the one you love should be there.

>>724448581

I don't know where you live but children will learn what they need in due time, usually on their own. Last thing I wanted was sexual education from my parents, but now I understand why... I can't talk about normal parents, I never had those.

>>724449083
i think a good tactic is to
1) give your kids a good up-to-date 2017 textbook with pictures and stuff
2) be ready to play a good defense. if they want to talk, be open to answer questions and buy them condoms or whatever. if they really would rather discuss this with their teacher or whatever, thats cool too.

i hate when parents just play a hard offense though and like, take you driving, lock the doors, and talk about their personal masturbation habits.

>>724448732

Mostly ones from hypnosis and leading questions. I had none of these, I just literally remember.

Most of those studies were financed by (((them))), too.

>>724448939
Again, at no point in my post did I suggest it was okay for people, parent or otherwise, to molest children. I said that some kids can handle exploring their sexuality at earlier ages than others. That statement, by itself, does not indicate that an adult should be the person they are partaking in that activity with. And even if it did, notice how the very next sentence talks about how it's difficult to know with any sort of certainty how a child feels about those sorts of things going on. Which, if you had any sort of reading comprehension, you would understand means it's an even worse idea for a parent or other adult to 'guess' at.

But fuck actually reading what people actually type, right? Let's all just skim over it and make huge, incorrect assumptions about what the other is saying.

>>724448821

Sex ed from teachers, no problem with. Did you even read? I have issues with parents teaching their own kids. What kid wants to know about sex from his parents? What parent wants to teach that? My parents were fucking eager to.

By the time you get sex ed, you've already been exposed to porn, and they don't address that.

>>724449030

She left because I had cheated on her, to be fair. I stood by her to deal with the aftermaths (she has some BPD traits) but I didn't realise the full extent of my own past until she was gone.

>>724449227
I'm sorry, who is (((them)))?
Also, you're right, leading questions and other improper therapy techniques are usually but not always to blame. Sometimes however, it's as simple as reducing cognitive dissonance.

>>724441975
>oddly bad
Explain?

>>724449170
>i hate when parents just play a hard offense though and like, take you driving, lock the doors, and talk about their personal masturbation habits.

My father literally showed me his cock when I was 10, while on holidays. I don't even know why, but I sure wasn't asked my opinion about it.

>>724441975
How did you not know you had been? Are you fuckin stupid or somethin?

>>724441975
Or you're just a fucking pussy.

>>724449615

It made me feel physically sick on a level that was more intense than my usual empathy for people. My ex fiancée made me watch that Johnsons short film, by surprise, and I became super fucking upset because of it. I felt bad for a whole day afterwards.

>>724446100
>I am sure now they baited us by saying, "Don't go to our room when we're gone!"
You poor thing

>>724449905
>How did you not know you had been? Are you fuckin stupid or somethin?

I'll give you an example. When my aunt zipped up my cock on purpose, they all acted like it was an accident. As a child, I had no reason to suspect my parents and my aunt derived pleasure from my pain, even as an adult it isn't the first conclusion you go to.

99% of the abuse I received could be construed as an accident, a joke, or a fair punishment, or just my father losing his temper.

The rest I downplayed and didn't think about much. When it happens to you as a child, you normalise it as you normalise everything else. You don't have a perspective. It's only much later, if at all, that you realise something was off, usually when talking about it with someone else.

Narcs be in this thread. You won't get any supplies from me, I won't even respond to your posts, or point out how little sense you make.

I know now, my parents do the exact same nonsense.

Sorry you couldn't face your abusers and not become like them. Now fuck off.

>>724450295
Wait, because they laugh about it in hindsight you think they took pleasure in it at the time?

>>724450484

I don't need to think anything with what I know now. I know they took pleasure in my pain, and this was done on purpose.

They mentioned it as a funny thing, even in front of my fiancée and myself; this was no accident either.

There's a whole context to this that you don't know, but yes, they took pleasure in that. They feed off other people's pain.

>>724450684
I know the type.

>>724451809
Took me a long time to see it and understand people like that exist but looking back now on my own memories it makes sense

>>724451809

Share your story.

>>724441975
>I had been abused during my childhood.
No, you're just an oversensitive faggot who achieved nothing in life trying to find someone to blame for your lack of competence.

I suggest you grow the fuck up and stop bitching.

>>724441975
huh, wierd. I can't stand tickles
I feel really bad about watching anything about childabuse
I hate loud sounds
the only parts of my childhood i remember was whne my father kept me locked in our playroom where me and my sister lived and him coming down and fucking us in the ass
I do find the words "I am sorry" when spoken by either of my parents, either false sounding, or yeah, phony

Huh, maybe I did get molested as a kid. How do I go about to find out more about this?

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This thread is hilarious.

>>724451896
Had a narc and a sadist raise me. Grew up fast and blocked it all out as much as I could. Still hate them especially when they try to worm back into my life and act like they've changed while still showing glimpses of their fucked up true self. That's as deep as I've got time to get into for now.

>>724451932

Sounds like you're trying to convince yourself. I'm sorry about your repressed abusive past, anon.

>>724450295
>WHAAAAAAAA
>I'M SUCH A VICTIM
>WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>NORMALIZATION WHAAAAAAAA

Get over it champ. We all have our scars.

>>724452216
Grow the fuck up, faggot.

Life isn't fair for anyone. Stop being such a cry baby and make something out of your life instead of just pushing the responsibility for your failures into somebody else.

Sitting down being a little bitch just because you had a shitty life doesn't make you special. Grow up, retard.

>>724450684
>I don't think
>I just assume
>I can't believe people wanna look back on an accident and laugh
>they must be feeding on my pain

Do you get a free coffee if you play the victim card enough? kek

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>>724452465
>they must be feeding on my pain
This part really rustled them.

>>724452144

Read about the various types of abuse, it may remind you of things. Lots of things happened to me I didn't even know was abuse.

Good luck, anon.

>>724441975
I wasn't abused or anything my family was good to me but I've got some memory tucked back of loud screaming. Not normal household shit or parental fighting that you might hear naturally but there's this scream that echoes in my head every once and awhile. I can't remember if maybe it's from a show or if something really happened but it's genuinely haunting. Part of me doesn't wanna know what it's from. Any tips for how to figure that shit out?

>>724452772
>I didn't know it was abuse
>but now that I've read that it is surely everything my parents and extended family ever did to me was out of spite

>>724452164

Fuck off, dad.

>>724452214

Shame, I'd love to hear more.

>>724452144
lold

>>724452733
Why? He made the same mistakes as you and you're over it

>>724453039
Go to tumblr.

There are lots of faggots there bitching that they've been "abused" as an excuse to justify their lack of self-awareness and immaturity now.

You'll be in good company there, if you just want to bitch and complain without actually doing anything productive with your life.

>>724452733
Also why delete?
>work of fiction and fools

>>724452772
ok, I will. I mean, dad was never very violent and although I never saw our mum, I knew he kept her safe and well. She wa shis favourite daughter he said on many different occasions. Maybe I should try hypnotherapy to see fi I can unlock and repressed memories? Like, I have always had this fear of going to the pool because that was the forbidden area where the neighbours could see into the yard. Maybe that is the reason why I am so scared of water today? Maybe it would be better to just see a councellor or a shrink though? What do you think? Are there any good on topic links I could research up on?

>>724453767
If legit. See doctor. Don't listen to some faggot on the interweb

Narc levels are rising ITT. If nobody responds to their bait, they will blow the fuck up.

>>724449473

It's an awkward conversation in general. If you were unlucky enough to be the product of terrible parents, that sucks. Your situation is not universal.

>>724453767

Repressed memories are debunked bullshit anon. But see a psych if you've got a case of mindfuck.

>>724453972
>narc

I don't think you're using that right m8

>>724453866
I have a slight phobia against doctors though. My dad would always dress up as doctor when he gave me my prostate exams. Since he died I've had to do the exams myself although i've never worked out how to make my thumb shoot ointment the way dad did. Maybe I should just confront my fears and go speak to a real one. I need to speak to someone about my gums anyway

>>724454184
yeah thats what my sister always told me. In the note she left us she said that this life was the illusion but what came next was the real life. I hope she's right cos otherwise she's in for a big fucking surprise down in hell

>>724447655
I know that. I clearly didn't explain myself properly. It was late, I have time now. Society still carries on some traditions from centuries ago. Women as a gender were highly respected in cultures because they represent life. They bring people into the world and keep them alive. (Most people highly respect their mothers for providing life, comfort, strength, love etc. I am NOT saying MEN cannot do this. But most people have a connection with their moms which is an instinctive thing.) I think that today our society has, obviously, evolved, but I think that this area of respect towards a woman comes from that. Its not proper. Men have their set of problems too. I think society holds an unfair standard that men should always emotionally and physically strong, and that they should be the main provider for a family. Again, this comes from way back when. Women are the nesters men are the providers. Not fair for either but we still have these "traditional" ways of thinking.

>>724452787
>Any tips for how to figure that shit out?

Focus on it. Read articles about similar subjects, it can ring bells.

>>724453767

See a therapist, but I'd refrain from hypnosis. It may make you make things up rather than unlock them.

Talking about things with a therapist and answering their questions may help discover things.

>>724454184

Factually wrong, both false memories and real repressed memories are fact.

Look it up. People who went to war and don't recall official events aren't making shit up. They recall said events decades later sometimes.

>>724444188
Something like this also happened when Freud first started psychoanalysis. He thought all sorts of abuse had been going on, especially in early childhood, until the subjects started telling him stories of being abused by people he knew to be dead at the time. These memories can very well be repressed fantasies.

>>724454923
>Since he died I've had to do the exams myself although i've never worked out how to make my thumb shoot ointment the way dad did

At first I thought you were making a joke, then I wasn't sure...

Anon?

>>724456399

And he was right. But what happened was that his peers laughed when he first told them about the abuse, which nobody believed in, so he changed it to dreams and fantasies.

In other words, Freud betrayed all these people so he'd look better to his peers.

The people he had talked to were telling the truth. Nobody today doubts that a lot of abuse is indeed taking place.

>>724453767
>Maybe I should try hypnotherapy to see fi I can unlock and repressed memories?

Not hypnosis. EMDR. It has some crazy capacity to sideways around emotional blocks and all memory to come to consciousness. Well-tested for trauma.

>>724457905

What's EMDR?

>>724458165
>What's EMDR?

An entry in Wikpedia.

<goodwill evaporating>

>>724458461

Sounds like bullshit. You lost an opportunity to convince someone. Won't get a second chance.

>>724458918
>Won't get a second chance

Whatever. Your loss.

>>724459121

You're acting like a little bitch.

File: composite-carrie-booze.jpg (39KB, 750x500px) Image search: [Google]

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>>724459317

Don't tempt me.

>>724459275

You want white-knight attention, go post as a girl about a relationship problem.

You want to be curious, ask a question.

>>724459597
>You want to be curious, ask a question.

He did just that, and you told him to go ask wiki. Bravo.

>>724441975
>can't stand tickles too long
>you can't stand sudden loud sounds, it upsets you
Go on...?

>>724459764

Asking what an acronym is when you're already on the internet and google is a click away is the opposite of curiosity.

>>724460014

Do you feel like there's a hole in you that only true love can fill?

>>724460058

Which has nothing to do with what you were just told. Answering can be done with regards to this thread, highlighting relevant elements that a wiki article won't do.

>>724460143
>Do you feel like there's a hole in you that only true love can fill?
Don't want to nudge you thinking that I was molested by answering, knowing how unlikely it would what with considering who my parents are (nice chaps and all), but I mean I guess so.

Then again that's like half of 4chan on the shitty boards like these.

>>724460410
by answering yes*

>>724460410
>my parents are (nice chaps and all), but I mean I guess so.

I thought so too, until I realised they weren't.

>suddenly wondered why my mother would throw away things I made for her in school, saying we didn't have enough room, though we lived in a huge house

>it was on purpose