Feels thread? Feels thread. >Be me 17 year old /B/ >Has

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Feels thread? Feels thread.

>Be me 17 year old /B/
>Has a twin, polar opposite
>Compassionate, caring, and so so kind
>Every night he comes into my room and hugs me and wishes me good night
>Tells him to screw off
>Act likes I hate it
>He always sings that crappy Cups song when I do
>But he only remembers the "You're gonna miss me when I'm gone" part
>Never thought that'd be the last words I hear from him
>Jan 4. Night like any other night but when he does this I'm not in the mood
>Shoves him off me just throw insults at him
>He cries, but he still smiles at me wishing me good night before singing that damned song again
>When I'm gone
>When I'm goooone
>You're going to miss me when I'm gone
>Wake up the next morning and decide I need to apologize, and pat his head or some shit, small stuff like that made his day
>Open the door can't see shit and I turn on the light
>I was horrified by what I saw
>He dressed up in his dress clothe, the black funeral ones, but his sleeves are rolled up and there are these massive slashes going right down them
>Blood fucking everywhere
>I rush over to him and try to wake him up for some damn reason
>Gave him CPR even, call to my parents
>Mom comes she starts wailing
>My Dad gets their immediately after that, war vet, he already sees their is no point he rips me off him
>Tears blurring my vision and snot getting everywhere, I somehow break free and run to my twin
>Shaking him and yelling at him to wake up
>I don't how long passes but I was pulled away from him again by my Dad and the Paramedics take my brother to the hospital
>He was already dead
>I was given a note told that it was addressed to me amd was in my twins pocket.
>He wrote that this wasn't my fault, that he knew deep down that I loved him, that I just didn't show it, and he loved me with all his heart

Several years later I still blame myself for his death and it has made my life hell as I can't even sleep at night anymore without seeing him laying there and Cups playing