've recently been kind of quiet about this, but I want to

>>723764806
>different girl I meet
>also become good friends
>few months later, she becomes my girlfriend
>lets call her S
>S and I are pretty close, but L and I are much closer
>S finds out I have a relationship with L
>S gets jealous quick, slowly tries to distract me from her
>ignores it for a couple of months, but she got strict
>goes through my phone everyday to see if I texted L
>had to constantly delete messages to prevent her to lashing out on me

But all girlfriends do that, right?

>S and I talking
>get extremely bored of her, tells her I'm going to sleep
>night anon! I love you!
>love you too!
>immediately start talking to L
>get into all night convo, both of us pass out by 3
>feelsgoodbro.jpg
>next morning
>S all pissed and sad
>asked why, said because she was mad that i chose L over her
>fuck
>try to bullshit her, saying i couldnt fall asleep
>she stops talking to me for a bit
>feeling terrible, go to L for emotional support
>still having close friendship
>really enjoying her presence overall
>bond with L somehow stronger with S being on sad mode
>of course, supporting S emotionally aswell

>>723764806
Go ahead

>>723764951
>S one day gets furious
>absolutely fucking angry
>blackmails me with my DP's I sent her, and things I told her about people that I thought I'd trust her with

Pro tip: Don't ever send dick pics to anyone that you trust. Ever.

>freaking the fuck out, not sure what to do
>ask her what she wants me to do
>says to unfriend L and to call her a slut, flat asses, so many horrible names
>heart completely stops
>all trust lost in S
>all respect lost in S
>tell her no, and that I'd 'never' do that to her
>she sends my mother a text
>of course, being the beta 15 year old, I freak the fuck out and approach L
>tell her everything I've been said to tell
>feel absolutely horrible
>literally contemplating breaking up with her and regain friendship with L
>'Damage has been done' - Anon
>S is happy that I did it
>I pretend that I am, to keep her happy.
>Betafag commencing so hard.
>pretending I hate L, to keep her happy.
>one day forget about L, and did for a while

>>723765453
>feeling like shit in relationship
>too cowardly to break up
>S said if I ever tried to, I'd be punished
>literally a lose-lose for me
>8/10 girl, (used to be when i met her) 10/10 personality
>met the real her
>a manipulative, lying fucking whore
>I'm so fucking angry at her, but don't show it
>To keep her happy.
>everything I've fucking done, was to keep her happy.

A year or so passed, and we broke up for a short time. I felt like absolute shit. I stayed in my room for weeks, and decided to text L

>she responds
>awkward vibe, but we get back together pretty well
>tell her everything
>what S did, how anything I said wasnt true
>she believes me, and we become good friends again
>relieved.mp4
>S and I get back together, and same old cycle begins.
>S gets mad I talk to L, unfriend L, break up, befriend L, etc. etc.
>this happened about 3-4 times
>one point, I stopped giving any shits.
>talked to L way more while in relationship with S
>S is angry, tell her to fuck herself and show my mother
>thinking I'm alpha male, and coolest fucker in town
>finally feel happy that I did it
>feel so stoked
>go to bed feeling easy that night

A week passed, and my mother came to talk to me

>sat me down, face serious
>heart sank, stomach squeezing up
>"anon, i want to talk to you about what people do when they're older. you know, sex."
>she actually fucking sent them.
>feeling like total betafag and shit again
>feeling like I'm a slave of her, and whatever I do that doesnt please her, she'll brutally come back with an attack

>>723766388
>lost trust in S again
>she takes full advantage of every situation
>if I didn't make her feel a certain way, dress a certain way, talk to people she didnt like, anything
>she'd blackmail me
>recently found out about abusive relationships in grade
>it fucking clicked
>is she, abusive?
>thought no, couldnt be.
>put that thought away until now

Fast forward to a year later, S and I are on our 2nd to last relationship "break"

>feeling happy at first, then slowly gets worse
>feeling uneasy, then sad
>then depressed
>chest literally hurts for 2 weeks
>crying myself to sleep
>too weak to stand anymore
>chest still hurting like a mf
>feeling the shittiest of shit
>never felt this horrible in my life
>really made an impact on me
>needed happiness
>realized she was "my happiness"
>my 'true lover' (Bullshit, of course)
>get back together with her a month or so later
>feeling happy again
>realized that I've been depending on her the entire time
>SHE was the one making me feel like this
>in a rollercoaster of emotions
>thinking about suicide
>say fuck no, decide to keep going forward

Really glad I didn't An Hero. Don't do it over someone.

>try to contact L, but she put me aside
>realized this relationship is actually toxic
>im the one always trying to make her feel happy
>she does nothing in return

Fast forward again, we break up on Halloween. I didnt give a fuck about her, I was just too sad and angry about her. Fuck her.

Fuck S, she doesnt deserve shit...

Talk to L, try to get with her instead. It will be a lot healthier for you

>>723767640
Fuck both of them. You know he's a faggot and just wants cock.

>>723767121
>feeling great man
>feeling amazing after finally getting away from her
>getting out more, being around friends more, all that cute shit
>decide to talk to L
>surprisingly invites me back into her life
>gets bond back, partially
>been like this for a while

It gets boring for this part, so I'll skip to basically now.

>L and I were getting closer
>Things get a little, romantic (;
>been talking about getting together for a bit, then finally muster up courage
>her friend supporting me all the way, telling me to go for it
>tell her I will, wait until tomorrow so she feels great (she was in a kind of bad mood then)
>wake up, heart ready to give to her
>grining ear to ear, open up messages
>go to her profile, see a little thing in her bio
>"1/17/17"
>grin slowly turns into a straight face
>heart once again, sinks
>realize I'm always being fucked over
>L and her boyfriend have a bad relationship, try to stay out of it.
>pissed because I couldve been hers, I wouldve done so much better than him
>boyfriend litterally just using her for nudes and to make her buy him shit
>feeling horrible for her
>Feels.exe has commenced.

>>723768051

I've been this way for so long. I'm not depressed, or thinking of An Hero. I just feel, empty.

I always make everyone happy and laugh. I'm the clown. But no one ever does anything for me.

I'm the one thats always making everyone else feel better, but myself.

I feel empty, /b/. Empty.

>be me
>lonleyfag
>browsing /b/ and doing nothing with my life
>spending time all day and all night in my room
>doing absolutely nothing
>wondering what happened in my life
>wondering what I should do anymore
>always being told to stop staying in my room
>making this thread
>same old boring cycle begins when i wake up.
>wake up
>go to school
>make others laugh and feel great
>come home
>stay in room
>browse 4chan
>talk to internet friends
>go to sleep

Fuck me man.

>>723768082
I now realize my ex was abusive.

I'm being cucked by L and what she does to date other guys, and not settle down with one.

I'm being ratted out by my family nonstop for simply doing nothing

I do nothing at all anymore

But hey, I've heard worse.

I'm gonna go relax for a bit. Feel free to say anything, /b/rothers.

>>723768288
Cut L off for now. No contact. No beta bullshit. Wait for her little relationship with this other fag to spin itself out, and then spring back in there and close the deal. Quit feeling sorry for yourself man. Get it together and stay strong.

>>723768417
Thanks for the good advice, anon.

Only problem is that she always gets back together with fucking faggots. No point in it anymore honestly.

I've been trying the last part of what you said. I've been hanging out with my friends more, and slowly been picking back up on my hobbies. This other friend I've been talking to is really nice and I love her to death.

>>723767121
>>723766388
>>723765453
>>723764949
>>723764806
you're an asshole , L probably loved you and you choosed this S demon semen , stop thinking with your dick , think with your brain.

>>723768725
You're probably right, kek.

I was a fucking fool, and I regret it. I cant rebond with L again anymore. It's too hard, you know?

I've recently taken that advice and kept it true. So far, I gotta say, it's hard actually finding someone I care about, and not what my dick wants.

I was young, and dumb.

>>723768082
inb4 tinfoil losers trying to tell you otherwise , a good carrer and education wont wake up in the morning and decide to leave you lol work on youself man , you cant stay home and vegetate hopinng a girl will make you happy , there is so much more in life than vaginas , also think about it when you will be 50 yo they will probably be ugly and anoying af

File: image.jpg (28KB, 500x281px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 500x281px

Just know there will always be people,maven here, willing to help you out.

>>723768856
You're still young and dumb. Just admit you're a faggot, love cock, and find an ice boy to let plow your browneye.

>>723769099
Maven. We're friends now, comrade.

>>723769049
Yeah, I really thought about my life. I'm going to quit this bullshit and fucking do something.

>>723769234
I am, honestly. Not everything else, but young and dumb

>>723769099
Also check em

>>723768725
>>723769049
its me again


>>723768856
i didnt meant to be rude or anything but you should see the brightest part of everything , you fucked , you learned . I really suggest you go out and meet new people , dont stay in this sadness spiral . If all this make you want to suicide it mean its REALLY not good for you . Remember the great feeling you felt with someone ? you can also feel the same with someone else if you ever want to feel this great and warm sensation again i suggest you just keep away from them , work on yourself and explore/ meet new people/ find new interest .

>>723769423
I'm really happy that you can consider improving yourself anon !

>>723769423
Maven was supposed to saw even, if you didn't realise. And I'm glad to be of assistance. Now I will withdraw coolly.

>>723769467
Nah, it's alright anon. I cant get sad that easily, kek.

But yeah, I've really gotten to see the good parts, of everything thats happened. Hopefully, I can pull through and quit being a neckbeard on /b/

I've also realized about the suicide thing. Little backstory

I used to joke about it all the time, saying how I was gonna do it
L's friend, E, actually did it one night.

I felt fucking weird, and just overall sad for L

Basically, I saw what it does to others, It doesnt benefit anyone, at all. It's just so sad.

Thanks for advice, anon. i'll take that to my heart.

>>723769707
Thank you.

>>723769774
Ah, I didn't. Thank you for letting me know. Stay frosty