I will share some funny stories about vandalizing my high school.

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part 2

>be in science class one day
>teacher is extremely uptight indian cunt
>tells teachers pet student to get something from her back office
>Student comes out with a shark
>at least 3 feet long, decent size
>It is left over form a college course she was teaching
>Smells like complete shit.
>shows us what she wanted to show us and then tells student to throw the shark in the trash can, because it is fucking rotting
>stinks up class
>tells student to put trash can outside classroom into the hallway
>idea.jpg
>run to lunch and tell friend about the shark
>go up to hallway and retrieve shark from trash can
>gagging from the stench
>lug the shark wrapped in newspaper to the shit smelling locker
>to this day, idk how he did it, but my friend throws the shark into the locker and unwraps the newspapers all in one motion
>somehow no one sees

cont?

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>>723426610
i might be the only one here but i'm baited. continue, friendo

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bump

>>723426610
inb4 the locker jumps the shark

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>>723426610
>>723426770

part 3

>shark starts to stink up entire hallway. weather is warm
>3 days go by and people are avoiding upstairs shark hallway
>friend can't even go to his own locker anymore
>everyone is carrying 30 pounds of books around in their backpacks because they cant go to their lockers
>come to school on day 4 of the shark being in it's new locker habitat
>hallway is shutdown
>see hazmat team of at least 6, in giant white suits and with tanks, walking through the hall spraying chemicals on all the lockers and vents.
>holyshit.png
>heat is on
>i am on list of suspects
>dean of discipline calls me down
>nicknamed the glock
>glock questions me for about an hour
>deny it to the end
>friend ends up getting ratted
>he is punished by another dean, one i like
>find out his punishment is suspension for 3 days
>come forward to respected dean
>decides to give us both 1 detention
>the glock is furious

pretty much the end of that story. I will get into some better shit if you guys want. I fucked my high school up A LOT

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>>723427143
lol yeah, this story is fishy

>>723427215
well, that was flaccid, but i don't have any vandalism stories, so fuck me too

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>>723427215
Story 2
>freshman year
>already hate the school
>have group of loser outcast friends that hate the school too
>make it our mission to fuck shit up
>school is building new lounge for seniors
>put up a dry wall temp wall to block off the construction
>wall runs parallel to "commons" where we ate lunch.
> one day we are eating lunch. our table consists of me and 3 freshman friends
>other end is 4 seniors we never talked to. they were losers too
>our table is right across from the temp wall. >Notice there is a hole towards bottom of the wall
>someone clearly kicked it
>we find it hilarious

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"My name is Glenn Cock and I am the Assistant Principal here. They call me 'The Glock' you little shits"

>in HS of 300 uptight rich white people
>only one that doesnt fit in
>in art room where all the liberal feminists hang out (theres a ton of them)
>have nasty sushi from nearby gas station
>small room in back full of old art stuff
>pour chocolate milk carton all over sushi

continue?

>>723427602
did u put a rotting shark in that hole? We've heard this story before.

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>>723427602
>next day whole is plastered over
>we couldnt stand for this
>wait till lunch is out and get into the crowd of people leaving commons
>my friend assassin creeds it up and blends into the crowd
>kicks wall 3 times, hole is reopened and even bigger
>run away cackling

>next day
>eating lunch and look for hole
>theres a fucking thick plywood board covering it
>challengeaccepted.exe
>bring in screwdriver next day
>wait for crowd again after lunch and go over to boarded hole
>3 of us cover our friend while he bends down to unscrew the screws holding the board. 2 top screws done
>kid twice our size walks up and says "hey" as crowd is dispersing
>"I'm the one who kicked the original hole, let me help ya guys out"
>we were stunned
>he rips the board from the wall making the whole at least 4 times the size of the original and a lot more fucked up looking
>so many lulz
>we now worship "the holegiver"

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This was like 5 years ago.
>Get laptops given to us by the school
>Guy in my class uses his to give out games like line rider and penguin throw
>Decides not to give me any because he wants a girlfriend and doesn't want to be seen conversing with me
>One day in biology
>He loads up this usb with like 200 games
>Gets up to take the usb to some guys down the back of the classroom
>Lean over and type 'child porn' into google on his computer
>Quickly exit off it before he gets back
>Think nothing of it, get angry that I couldn't think of a better idea in time
>See him being escorted out of the school by the IT admin, four police officers and the principal

>>723428309
Quality

southlake....pissed everywhere

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>>723428124
>holegiver is a total badass. has cool friends, has hot gf, and thought we were at least cool enough to talk to
>learn his name is nick and his gf is jackie, he only refers to her as "bitch" and insists we do the same
>follow nick into lunch line
>he takes entire tray of cookies out of display case and dumps them into his bag
>we were in total awe
>doesnt get caught
>decide to step it up with the wall
>start punching and kicking wall everyday as we pass it, other student do the same
>wall looks like swiss cheese
>makes our school look like trash
>water keeps flooding the halls because of heavy rain and shit temp wall filled with holes
>school redoes the floor costing thousands

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>had a jew friend who never looked at the chair before sitting down
>we used to put stuff on it prior to him sitting, just for teh lulz
>we tried it with a myriad of things, for some quite hilarious results
>it started getting old after a while, so I decided to crank it up to 11
>drew a penis with glue on his chair after making sure nobody would see me
>he sat on it, just as planned
>he actually got stuck to the chair and couldn't get out
>nearly ripped his pants in order to free himself
>serious lulz ensued
>next day the chair was on the hallway, pretty much ruined because the glue wouldn't come out
>principal comes in and asks who did that
>nobody suspected me because I was a quiet and introspected nerd back then
>class clown, who I hated, gets busted in my place
>internally congratulate myself for a masterfully pulled prank

>>723428936
kek

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>>723428557
now for worst story

>9th grade
>cookies at lunch come in bags
>decide it would be funny to fill them with water and throw them from stairwell
>they hit people like water balloons, it was funny for a day
>step it up
>decide to fill it with piss
>whos gonna do it
>friend volunteers
>this kid never did anything remotely bad
>we didnt believe him but he came out from the bathroom, wearing a giant grey coat, and holding the bag in said coat as if he were about to pull a gun
>sketchy as fuck
>go to top of stairs
>heart racing, sweaty af
>swing door open and friend throws the bag
>immediately turn and sprint
>heard from a friend later that we looked like 90 degree angles running down the hallway
>halfway down hall hear screams
>sounded like someone was murdered
>end of day get on bus and finally laugh about it

>next day
>jocks on manhunt for whoever "threw piss" on one of their pass around sluts
>apparently it hit her like a miss america banner across he entire torso
>trying so hard not to laugh
>We decide we need to step it up again

>im a russian american
>meet a neo nazi
>tell them my grandpa killed nazis in the red army
>they get mad and start yelling heil hitler
>i kek

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>>723429063
>get applejuice from commons during lunch
>piss in apple juice bottles
>3 or 4 bottles with piss
>they look just like applejuice
>get into lunch line when it is crowded and restock the shelves with the fresh squeezed bottles
>sit back down and wait

>later that day overhear two people talking about a girl who went to the hospital because of it
>ohhhhhfuck.jpg
>nothing happens

>school has chocolate milk
>we are all thinking the same thing, but no one will say it
>idea is finally addressed
>lets do it
>piss bag friend steps up again
>shits in bottle and brings it back to table
>we all sit there staring at it
>morals.exe kicks in
>we all pussy out
>friend puts it in backpack to throw off stairs later
>go to science class with him
>we are in the computer lab
>we get there late, only 2 seats are in front
>hot as fuck in class
>all of the sudden shit smell fills the air
>friend looks at me in terror, it opened in his bag
>we are sitting under a fan that blows the smell around the class
>one kid says "holy shit who farted"
>teacher scolds him but she too, trying to act professional, cant help but hold her nose and almost gag
>2 girls run from classroom
>teacher dismisses class and friend runs away

>>723429063
kekking

>be in bathroom
>on my period
>I decide to spill my blood out of my divacup on the floor everywhere
>no one else saw me do it
>later that day, ppl are talking about it
>I laugh

>>723429863
gtfo gh0st youre not welcome here.

>>723429959
who the fuck is gh0st

>>723430000
nice quads nigger, stop pretending

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>>723429615
run to bathroom to see all 3 of my friends.
>2 were standing over piss bag kid while he was shoveling a concoction of shit and chocolate milk out of his open backpack with his bare hands
>look of absolute terror on his face
>cant help but laugh

>lesson learned, no shit in chocomilk bottles. not secure enough
>school sells fruit smoothie drinks with twist on caps in commons.
>they are opaque
>buy one and fill with random food at lunch

at the end of the day, everyone walks in a crowd to a line of busses outside, very little security is outside so we did our attacks there the most.

>take fruit smoothie to bus line and dump it on some kids backback as hes getting on his bus
>kek all the way home
>we all know whats next
>decide to shit in the bottles and do guerrilla warfare attacks by busline
>risky but the lulz payoff was immense
>we started dumping shit bottles on people almost daily
>Then one day we got "mark"

>>723430000
respek the check

>be me in grade 8 in final year of middle school
>acquire a shit load of fake money
>put it random places, fill people's lockers with it and shit
>everyone is talking about how their locker got filled with fake money
>i tell friends about it and also give them some fake money to put in random places
>there is fake money fucking everywhere, air vents, under bleachers, inside desks, in cabinets, behind posters in the halls, you name it, it's probably there
>leave middle school
>in high school i'm still hearing about all of the fake money and how people are still fucking finding it after 3 years
>laugh my ass off with my friends
>repeat process in high school
>win

>>723430000
Yoooooooooo nice

>>723427215
i was hoping for an autistic work of fiction, not this crap.

Can we screen cap this. These are quality stories

I'm not letting this thread die soldiers

>>723431159

OH SHIT ANOTHER BUMP

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>>723430078
>Mark became a shit bottle victim 5 times
>I dont even remember why
>eventually started wearing his backpack on his chest like a faggot
>still a win
>months go by
>last day of school is coming
>we need to get mark
>piss bag kid doesnt wanna do it anymore
>understandably but we couldnt let mark get off that easy
>piss bag kid tells us that all the times we couldnt hit a target, he would get off his bus and throw the bottles in his neighbors bushes
>at least 10 bottles there
>he gets a bottle that was 6 months old
>it had been frozen, thawed, and baking in the heat for months
>this had marks name on it
>last day of school go into bathroom after lunch to strategize
>mark had let his guard down and started wearing his backpack normally again
>had to hit him in the bus line
>pb kid opens bottle in bathroom
>bottle hisses as if it were a carbonated drink
>upon hearing the hiss and the smell that raped my face, i almost instantly vomited into the trash can at least 3 times
>I have never smelled a dead body, but i imagine this was worse
>end of day, bus line time
>see mark walking
>middle of june, 90 degrees, pb kid walking behind mark, wearing giant grey coat with hand inside, as if he were the king from that xbox 360 burger king game sneak king
>dumps shit on mark as hes walking up bus stairs
>driver sees and screams wtf, friend throws on hood and sprints to his bus
>i watched mark walk to the back of the bus while everyone screamed at him
>he then realized what happened, walked off the bus and pulled out his phone
>i was on my bus and heard him saying "ya mom, it happened again, i need a ride"
>motherfucking victory

and that about wraps up freshman year.

Plz

>>723431272

4CHAN IS NOW JUST A FUCKING TRAP AND LOLI PORNSITE. THIS THREAD IS A DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH AND I REFUSE TO LET IT DIE. FIGHT WITH ALL OF YOUR MIGHT SOLDIERS!

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Bump

>>723431431
Fight is on

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CEE LO GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

>>723431431
ALL THE PEOPLE WHO'VE POSTED GREENTEXTS HAVE BEEN WORTHY (except for that one guy), this is a good thread, and OP is most definitely not a fag

>>723427868
Sure

O shit a bump

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>>723431288
quick one

>grade 11
>walked the halls and put combo locks on random lockers
>lulz at janitors trying to bolt cut them off
>start checking for open lockers
>whenever we found an open one we would take note of the number and take all the books
>at lunch (i now had an entire crew of like 10 people that fucked shit up daily) we would all sit and shred the pages form the books
>after lunch we would return the shredded books to the lockers and watch for lulz
>we would also go over to the public pc's during lunch and take the keys off like 4 different keyboard and put them on different ones so the home row spelled out "fuck niggers"

O shit anotha bump

Oh fuck three bumps in a row

b-b-b-bump

Soldiers wtf, this shit is dying.

Ba-ru-ba-ru-ba-bump

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>>723431827

Brump

Bump faggots

>>723430078
pls continue

Ba ba bump

SOLDIERS WE NEED BUMPS AND STORIES ON THE DOUBLE TO KEEP THIS THREAD ALIVE! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIIIIIGHT!

>>723427868
Cont.

>>723432136
BUMP

Badaboomp

>>723431288
>it had been frozen, thawed, and baking in the heat for months
>this had marks name on it
you should be an author

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>>723431288
>ya mom, it happened again, i need a ride
fuck my sides kek

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>>723431827
Only time i was ever suspended
>seniors now
>everyone is tired of 4 years of our shit
>we had caused shit attacks, a bomb threat which left 1 of our friends expelled, and various destruction
>we would buy extra milk and apples during lunch and then sit in the senior lounge
>bang apples on table for entire lunch
>make them really soft but dont break the skin
>go to stairs after lunch and chuck apples at wall
>they explode sending mush everywhere
>do the same with milk
>this goes on for weeks
>every fucking day, rotten food and milk in stairs
>everyone is extremely fucking annoyed
>makes it 10x funnier
>even my own gf is bitching about it daily when i would walk her from class
>"ya babe, some real immature kids here"
>security starts standing in target stairwell after lunch
>go to other stairs
>after a week of dodging them they start stationing janitors at the tops of the other stairs
>all stairwells covered
>start throwing food from the bottom
>they wanted our blood
>someone finally rats us out
>we werent doing much to hide, people are just oblivious
>teachers that know me find it funny
>gf thinks im a loser
>suspended for 3 days
>totally worth it

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bumper

Plz, to whoever is posting stories, we're bumping our part, keep yours up, we can't let this thread die, it's a conjoined effort

/B/UMP

>>723428309
That's so bad.

>>723432405
OP here. im trying guys

O shit we're back to Page 2 wadbump

>>723432327
>Bomb threat
Tell us more anon

How about instead of just vandal stories, we make this a general funny high school story thread

>>723432522
Thanks, you're awesome

>>723432598
Only posters will tell, the stories are what makes the thread after all

Moar pls

tits

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Bumperino

>be in 4th grade
>find old eraser
>pinch off smaller pieces to flick at kids i knew
>first try i flick it really hard and i mis-calculated
>bounces off my book and hits teacher square in face
>hits her so hard she says "ouch!"
>i sit there trying to keep a confused face while she's going bat shit crazy trying to find the kid throwing stuff
>kid that usually gets in trouble gets blamed
>kek inside

>>723428936
Legitimately funny. Good work anon.

Bumpity

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>>723432579
alright
this is a long one guys
part 1
>be in 10th grade
>blow shit up all the time
>axe cans and gas
>typical hs boy shit
>dumb hs kids so we filmed it and put it on youtube. friend decides to put first names in credits

>be at school
>someone makes shooting threat on bathroom stall
>its lame nothing happens but we have swat team at our school for the whole day
>lulz
>decide we wanna do one better
>decide to register on town forum as emo kid and talk about shooting up school
>decide this is a terrible idea and move past it

>ffwd one year
>friend brings up bomb threat idea again
>go to his house
>paints garden brick green (idfk why) and puts a cell phone keypad, some wires, and a 9v battery on it
>says hes gonna put it in the bathroom
>tell him not to
I was all for fucking shit up, but it was a dumb idea
>meanwhile police in our town have a file cabinet on us because of all the random explosions and fires.
>never destroyed any property or hurt anyone btw

Bumpity bump

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>>723429615

>Holy shit who farted

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>>723430260 cont.

>we step our game this time
>we jam that fucking fake money in toilets, completely clogging them
>janitor is fucking pissed
>we also put fake money in people's pants, hoodies and shit
>bathroom is COVERED in fake money
>bathroom closed for the rest of the school year
>everyone's locker is fucking unusable because it's filled with fucking fake money
>fake money is fucking everywhere. any place you'd look, they're would be fake money
>at the end of the school year, i brought tape
>i tape fake money to the wall, making it spell a message reading

THE GAME

>>723429497
So? I'm Slavic and think that national socialism is a fine system. How can you be happy with a Jew subverted, globalist world?

Bumpity bumpity

damn. all i did in high school was make a chemistry teacher cry.

>>723433322
Bumpity fuck you
Kek

>>723433446
Greentext?

>>723433446

elaborate in greentext

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>>723433124
part 2 bomb threat
someone please capthis, been meaning to type it all out for years but was always so lazy
>multiple videos now of us blowing shit up and running from police.
>videos are shots from woods of cops looking for us and us laughing
>makes them look like idiots

this is where it comes together. sorry im pretty stoned

>so friend brings brick into school and puts it in bathroom
>come into school and he runs up saying "its donw"
>wtf did u do dude
>go to first period, nothing
>second period in library
>with friend of mine
>all of our friends were asking about "the science project"
>all of the sudden librarian and security tell us to get out of PC area
>ohshit thats the wall that is shared with the bathroom
>knew it was the brick
>see firefighters in hall through library door
>ohfuckohfuck playitcool
> we are let out 45 mins later and told to sit in commons
>sitting with friends, we are all silent
>normally our group would be plotting something fucked up to do in the crowd but we were all sitting as if a family member just died
>sweating bullets

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>>723426057
>be me
>6th grade
>Last day of the school year
>Have sandwich I didn't eat at lunch
>decide to take the piece of cheese and slap it against the side because why the fuck not
>fast forward to 1st day of 7th grade
>decide to walk by my old locker on the 6th-grade hall (our grades had different halls for each grade 6-8th)
>As I pass by, I see a girl opening the locker
>Instant horrific look on her face as she is greeted to 4-month-old cheese
>stench was horrendous, cheese was moldy and disgusting looking
>mfw

wasn't really vandalism, but I felt like sharing, made my 12-year-old self laugh.

>>723433322

fuck, made a typo, i used the wrong 'there', sorry guys

>>723433701
>slap it against the side because why not
>Kek

>>723433701
i forgot to include that it was the side of my locker, but you would get that anyways by reading the whole thing.

/b/ump

bump of justice!

I was the vigilante of the school

>>723434006

elaborate

Bumparoo

>>723429863
Shit like this is why we thought girls are gross when we were little.

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Here's one
>be me, last year, 12th grade
>school had public laptops, everyone had an account for their email
>People were told that everyone had to have the same password.
>easy to log on to emails
>a few friends and I would go on a few kids emails and email links to gay porn and hentai and all kinds of nasty shit to teachers.
>teachers would check emails in front of us
Imagine some cranky teachers yelling at kids for emailing porn to them.
Got to the point where like 5 kids got expelled.

>>723434006
Elaborate bro

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Include me in the screencap

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>be 17, later 18
>senior year
>computer science blowoff
>teacher chill as fuck, couldnt give less of a shit
>only me and two other seniors in this class
>one is like fucking 5th overall in our class of like 300 something
>other is a csgo/minecraft fag
>play nothing but dune 2000 and bloons until like october
>learn 5th overall guy is a complete /b/tard
>three of us decide to fuck shit up
>start fucking up every little part of the computer
>all the way down to system sounds and shit
>downloaded tons of malware and other sketchy shit
>nothingleftuntouched.jpg
>literally vinesauce joel tier shit
>eventually out main computers became so slow we had to switch
>we fucked those up too
>half the computers in that lab were completely fucked by spring break

>pic related: my main lab computer as of december 2015

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>>723434298

nigger

>>723434199
kek

>>723434199
Check'd, so, everyone had the same password?

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>>723433700
part 3
>all of the sudden teacher comes in and says school is out because of a threat
>we all jump for joy
>stumble to my bus, adrenaline through the roof
>get home early
>"omg anon i heard what happened" said my mom
>uh ya im fine
>go out and find some friends and walk around town
>entire town is talking about it
>kids are talking about how they were stepping ove bodies to get out of school or that people were shooting at them
>lulz

>few weeks go by
>someone ratted
>friend is called down
>in office all day
>almost end of day and im starting to feel confident he denied it
>then im called down
>fuuuuuuuuuck
>security guards put me in a room and both talk to me
>been in trouble a lot, this is an old tactic
>start trying to get me to rat
>wont do it
>we know who it is anon, dont go down with him
>say they need me to admit
>make them say the name first
>they say it and i say yep
>im free to go
>i feel awful
>they knew it was him but i still ratted
>go home and try to contact terrorist friend.
>hes cut off
>parents took phone and pc
>but they forgot his psp
>back when we used to psp hack, he installed aim
>we talked via aim on his psp lulz
>didnt blame us

>2 weeks later, police raid his house and sieze his pc, find youtube history featuring our videos with positive ID's of us.
>we didnt know this

>>723429063
>we looked like 90 degree angles running down the hallway
What does that mean?

>>723434389
Holy kek

>>723434706
basically we were hunched completely over like olympic runners at a starting line

>>723434706
Bent over

>>723434706
That means they looked like mathematical concepts because of their autism levels, goddamn how dumb can you be

>>723433551
>>723433575
i forget exactly how it started
>be in some dumb bitches chemistry class
>tells us we can make LSD from rye bread
>bitch doesn't know about ergot and st. elmos fire
>lets out the gem one day that she dropped out of high school
>finally get fed up with other students complaining
>shes holding their own against them
>break out heavy psychological ammo
>she starts crying and leaves

i made a teacher quit when i was in massage school too
>nutrition class
>bitch is anorexic skinny
>watch stupid ass propaganda as "class"
>people bitch, because they want to actually learn
>but bitch doesnt know shit to teach
>i asked a question about the metabolism of carbs or some shit
>"this isnt a chemistry class"
>its_over.jpg
>shut her down. everything she says is countered perfectly.
>critique her teaching method, make a fool of her.
>wanted an apology.
>fuck you (respect is given via logical abilities, not because you're a fucking "teacher")

that school was shit. i hope i contributed to it shutting down.

>>723433322
dead meme

>>723434542
that's it?

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>>723434389
That desktop dude holy shit

>>723434389
of all fucking things, why Hammond?

>>723434856
What the fuck am I reading

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Bumping with mighty dubs zeppelin

>>723434481
Yes

>>723434109
>>723434218
>alot of kids got bullied in my middle school really poor town some kids wwere beatin up so badly they died
>police didn't do shit so i became Jack The Savior(i was gaven that name)
>bullys in groups 5-7 per some of them killed other students 2 of my friends died sad day
>but first i trained for 3 months
>I made a suit that was tough knives could not cut it took me $300
>it was worth it tho i was ready
>stabed in the leg went home duct tape and cleaner

>>723434860

you're just upset because you lost the game

>>723434856
I-uh-i W-what are you saying?

>>723434389
>vinesauce joel

kek

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>>723435142
Holy dubs

>>723435133
some meta-programmed sense of history

>>723435260
can we get an english version?

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>>723433701
Just remembered this one so I'll share it too, its nothing i did but its still pretty damn hilarious.

>10th grade
>be in english class, bored
>friend comes back from bathroom
>shit-eating smirk on his face
>instantly realize he has done something crazy
>ask him and he tells me he smeared his shit under the soap dispensers
>I dont believe him
>"go to the fucking bathroom then pussy"
>oknigger.png
>As i approach the bathroom, the smell of 10000 shits hits me like a freight train
>I walk in and i see the school's security guard taking a piss
>Nostrils are literally on fire from the putrid smell of the bathroom
>Start to take a piss, when i decide to look behind me
>The security guard started to wash his hands, when all of a sudden, he reaches his hand under the soap dispenser
>"WHAT THE FUCK"
>Securitybro is pissed, while i lmao
>the motherfucker actually did it
>The whole hallway is evacuated while they bring someone in to clean it up

pic related, my friend smeared it all under the curved part to where you couldnt see it, what a fucking brilliant mind he had.

>>723431288
>as if he were the king from that xbox 360 burger king game sneak king
Do not understand reference.

>>723435260
You sound like a child lmao

>>723435260
What are you even talking about?

>>723435260
Wtf is batman in this thread now

>>723435265
High school was a long time ago mang. I remember the teacher saying something stupid, and the students jumping on her for it. Eventually I began pointing out her flaws until she broke.

>>723435260
Were you on your sixth birthday or the seventh?

>>723435260
african-american i inquire

>>723435391
kek

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>>723435028
no sir
part 4?
>police now have videos of us
>carnival in town
>friend lives a few streets away
>go over to his house and get gas and an axe can
>use to much gas, massive fire and then explosion
>middle of side road
>car comes up and stops
>we sprint
>police swarm the neighborhood
>sneak back to carnival with friends
>split up
>friend and i get in line for a ride
>notice cops watching us
>tell friend to ditch illegal stuff
>we throw our weed and knives under the ride right as cops grab us
>question us about "the firebomb"
>"no idea what your talking about officer"
>we were 15
>friend was 13
>they take him aside
>he doesnt crack

>4 days later its 6:18 AM
>wake up to swat team in my room
>officers downstairs searching my house
>parents on couch looking terrified
>sister too
>put me on couch and start asking me questions
>i say nothing
>still trying to figure out why they are there
>hear something about bombs
>fuck
>parents: "WTF ANON BOMBS?? MOLOTOV COCKTAILS??!!!"
>fuuuuuuuuuuuck

>>723435260

what are you, 5?

>>723435392
imagine someone sneaking in the most obvious, animated, and least conspicuous way possible. thats how he was sneaking

>>723435678

moar pls

>>723435260
posts like this will get you banned for being underage jesus christ dude

>>723435260

MODS

>>723435923
that post is fucking gold and you know it!

>>723435260
Plz plz plz cont

>Grade 9
>Never use my locked and basically just carry all my shit with me
>Don't eat my food one day
>decide that for the next two weeks I would keep my sandwich and not eat it for a devious plot
>14 days and 14 sandwiches gone uneaten later I'm ready
>wander around at lunch finding random open lockers
>if they had random papers at the bottom I hid a sandwich under those
>I use 12 on lockers
>one of the remaining two goes into the back of a toilet
>the other ends up in someone's bag as people crowded out of the cafeteria
>do this multiple times, always waiting to build up sandwiches
>never get caught
>people start talking about the sandwich bandit, or sandy bandy, or my personal favourite nickname I was given, the sandwicho bandito
>some people want his next attack
>others fear for their locker's safety
>decide that I'm going to wait a whole three months
>my bag becomes entirely dedicated to holding moldy as fuck sandwiches and my grades plummet
>do it for the sandy bandy
>three months pass and I place sandwiches everywhere. Every single locker I found got one if it had no lock.
>because it had been so long people stopped worrying
>their mistake
>I get ballsy and throw one into the janitor's room
>it lands right in front of him as he eats
>he visibly gags and nearly throws up then and there
>I was unnafected by the smell because I had some good quality plastic bags that would come off of a sandwich during attack
>do this for the next three years
>hear about people finding random moldy sandwiches in their lockers that look like their three years old
>kek

>be in 9th grade
>be in computer lab
>bored as fuck because teacher was buying coffee
>suddenly a fucking cat is stuck in the window
>we are un the 2nd floor, so everyone was terryfied
>i've read that cats can survive large falls
>"don't worry people, i got it"
>fucking genius me tries to grab the scared cat
>suddenly the window cat falls
>everyone screams & cries
>"HEY CHILL CHILL, he is fine, after all cats survive large falls"
>when class finished, everyone rushed to see if the cat was fine
>the fucking window cat was splattered on the ground
>everyone screamed
>got reported & suspended
>now im known as the window cat
Fucking cats, they die so easily

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>>723435678
part 5 final
>cops tell me to go to school
>parents take me
>2 hours late
>pulling up to school at same time as another one of my friends
>he was involved and in the videos as well, he also lived next door to the kid who lived near the carnival and uploaded the vids
>"hey dude, how was YOUR morning"
>"ya not too great"
>according to him, they raided 7 of our houses at the same time. the entire police force and some cops from the next town over had to come
>full swat gear and guns for 7, 15 year old kids, blowing shit up
>then shit got real
>turns out, they found us from raiding terrorist friends house for bomb threat at school
then they conducted this raid because they believed we were a terrorist cell
>those words are in the 35 page police report we all got
>im 25, my parents still wont let me have it
>everyone has to go to juvie for one day. not me because im 16, i get tried as an adult
>friends say juvie was a blast
>played volleyball with niggers and ate fried chicken, no joke
>my trial goes on for months
>court ordered house arrest for all of us and zero contact with each other
>we all got comm service
>i had 250 hours
>friend had 350 and it went down to about 150 for the less involved
>we all did our "comm service" together at a nature center. unsupervised we all just ate pizza and smoked weed for the entire summer and got our papers signed.

all in all it was expunged from my records. we were also too young for it to be in the papers so i have no permanent record of it. my charges were
12 counts terrorism
12 counts manufacturing of bombs
12 counts criminal mishchief
12 counts vandalism
12 counts breach of peace
12 counts arson
and some other shit. 12 videos. I would have never been able to fly again if those charges stuck. got lucky with the whole thing. the cops were butthurt they couldnt catch us. I live in a small time so that was the most exciting day of their careers.

This wasn't so much vandalism as it was just fucking funny at the time.

>be me
>18
>senior year
>had a teacher who actually gave a shit about teaching seniors
>got powerpoint projects up the ass for the rest of the year
>timetofightback.jpg
>set the master volume of my projects down so low you had to turn the speakers up to max volume
>subtly insert some amplified volume jumpscares in the middle of it all
>mfw i'm sitting in class doing work while she goes through presentations on her desk
>mfw she gets to mine
>everything is really fucking quiet
>then
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>damn near fell out of her fucking chair
>let a couple other people in on it
>I had stopped at some point but the other idiots kept this shit going
>eventually we stopped doing computer presentations altogether because she got sick of getting the shit scared out of her

>>723436512
It would be really cool if you died.

>>723435260
wtf

>>723436754
Are the bomb vids on Youtube?

>>723437025

don't worry i reported the post

>>723430662
Way ahead of you anon!

>>723437238
pretty sure the have been removed for legal reasons, but would be interesting to see

>>723437361
Post them when you're done so we can all save them

>>723437382
Channel name, faggot.

>>723437238
not anymore, cops took all of our computers to be checked by "experts"
i got the pc back and the vids were in the recycling bin
restored them, flash drive and my friend put them on his grandmas pc that isnt connected to the internet for safe keeping
I have one video that never hit youtube bc the cops got us first. It was a mashup of all of our explosions plus some scooter tricks (we were really fucking into scooters)
I cannot upload it though
Its on my pc though

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>Highchool boys uniform was a blue shirt
>Boys would rip the pockets off each other shirt as a prank
>You would no nonchalantly approach your victim, strike up a conversation, then grab the pocket and pull
>Everyones mum just sewed them back on
>One of my friends had his mum sew his back on closed
>Wouldn't let mine do it because I used it for pens

>>723437462
not the storybro nigger

>>723436754
I really hope someone is screencapping this

>>723437502
why can't you upload it?

>>723437552

worry not

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>>723437552
done

>>723436481
>Sandwicho Bandito


Sides


Low Orbit
Me

BARMP

>>723436754
Did someone cap this? I would love to have it but I'm on a phone

>>723437552
me too. Ive been meaning to tell these stories for years, always too lazy

my mother plans on writing a book about the entire event. i was arrested 2 more times for selling weed but the stories are not too great. She really hates the cops for raiding us when they could have just talked to them or arrested us without invading our privacy. I too have been compiling all these stories from my childhood for a book one day

Im sorry guys, no videos are online anymore.

Along with emailing porn to teachers, I would stuff gay yiff into this furry freshmans locker, and he got suspended AND bullied for it. I would greentext but my phone is being slow at typing.

>>723437707
Thanks

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>>723437707
thanks anon

>>723436798

I don't know why, but this is my favorite story. I really like spontaneous noises for some reason.

>>723437792
Send the vids to me or someone on this post and let them post it

>>723437707
Nice anon

>>723437707
OP here, thanks bro

>Had a pen I liked
>Girl asked me if she could borrow a pen
>I gave her my favorite
>Ask for it back after class
>"Oh I've already put i my bag anon"
>"Oh"
>Never see that pen again

>>723437968
What an ungrateful, stuck-up bitch. I can take a lot of shit, bit pen theft? Fuck no. Knock her fucking teeth out.

>>723437923
tell you what, gimme your email and ill consider it

I cant promise it though. those videos could fuck a lot of poeple over, I may edit the only one i have so there are no faces, or fucking scooter tricks

its nice to not see a usual shitpost thread once in a while, and a quality story thread. Well done guys, you guys are alright

>>723438133

i would fucking clip her teeth with nail clippers

>>723438167

this isn't your average stupid fucking 'pics you shouldn't share', 'loli', 'dick worship', 'roll dubs', or 'trap worship' thread. this, my friend, is 4chan at its finest.

>>723437953
You're welcome, it was a pretty good story

>>723437707
Saved thanks anon.

All round great thread.

>8th grade
>went to a private school this year
>got sent to ISS for being out of dress code
>bigfuckingdeal.png
>was the time of the year when people could do that chocolate fundraiser
>dozens of stacks to ceiling of this shit in the ISS room
>ISS was half assed and unsupervised here
>the principal would just give your work for the day, shut the door and that was it
>decide to do the school a favor
>stick four boxes into my bag and leave school that day with them
>next day, out of ISS
>hide the boxes in parts of the bathrooms and leave subtle hints to where they were
>shit catches on
>the boxes were nearing empty by the end of the week
>everything escalates at this point
>some idiots decide to kick it up a notch
>administration wondering why whole stacks of chocolate boxes have been vanishing from the ISS room
>everyone in the school was loaded with this shit after a few days
>mfw we only raised only a little over $1000 bucks off the chocolate this year

>>723438136
sure

[email protected]

Inb4 other fags rape this email

>>723437457
Can't edit them together, it's like 25 images and I'm on mobile.

I'll put them all on imgur or something so the rest of you guys can edit it together if you like.

>>723427215
thats like what kids do at kindergarden, fuck 0/8

>>723434389
How bad did this one get anon?

>>723438343
What's an "ISS"?
I'm a sciencefag, so I read that as Internation Space Station.

>>723438495
tried to start it a little tame

>>723438133
Actually I ended up getting arrested several years later, and by some magical stroke of luck she saw me getting hauled into the cop car.

She went to the station and waited for me, tears in her eyes. She said she knew I would have done the same, then she brought me mac'donalds.

I still never got that pen back though.

>>723438534
In School Suspension

You literally just sit on your ass all day, isolated.

Pretty mild shit here, Ausfag style.

>>/b/e me
>> Year 11 in HS
>> Have literal angry deaf midget as teacher
>> Have huge dust extraction setup in industrial arts room
>> Keep putting fucked shit up the vents
>> Calculators, an entire box of nails and screws, white board erasers, etc
>> Dust extractor is always fucked because the blades keep getting fucked by hectic shit
>> Costs the school just over 40,000 dollars in maintenance over the year
>> Principal never knew who did it, because everyone did it
>>Deaf midget would never hear it but was always pissed off
>>One day threw entire box of loose marbles down vent
>>entire system rattles and makes the most horrid noise, the whole school could here it
>> all 23 students get questioned 1 by 1
>>never work out culprit
>> entire class fails and has to do study for the rest of the year

>>723438666
OP here
>first ISS was middle school
>put me in room where morning announcement are done
>sitting there all day deciding to fuck with PA system or not
>this must be a test
>decide fuck it and turn it on
>horrible screeching noise
>turn it off
>principal busts door open and brings me to another room
>all other ISS were in conference room

>>723438666
Nice satanic trips.

Oh, I had one of those! Got it for kicking down a door.

>>723438666
Not that fat, but I had that shit all the time when I was in 6th grade. I was friends with the teacher and it was nice getting all the work done by lunch.

>>723438517
Literally installed Bonzi Buddy on it at some point and everything just went downhill. There were so many malicious toolbars in IE that you couldn't even see the webpage. I tried logging in one day after that and it just hung. It stayed like that for the rest of the year.

include me in the screen cap

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>>723426057
>year after graduation
>2 friends and get drunk and break into portable at highschool during the night
>completely trash the place
>throw around desks, chairs, papers..etc
>piss on everything
>wipe our asses with random kids schoolwork papers and stack of tests on teachers desk
>friend takes a shit in some poor kids backpack that must have left it here over night
>smash tv
>smash windows
>draw dicks and write curse words on desks with permanent marker and on chalkboard with chalk
>smash whiskey bottles on floor
>leave portable
>smash couple of windows on main school building
>run back to friends house and play halo 3 like nothing happened

to this day i still have no idea what gave us the idea to do it

>>723439031

don't include this guy, he's a nigger

>>723438917
Yeah my 6th grade ISS monitor was pretty cool so long as you behaved. There were plenty of idiots to keep you entertained so it wasn't all that bad.

>>723438343
>get sent to international space station

>>723439045
OP again
lol dude i used to, and still do shit like this from time to time
I just get random urges to destroy shit
its fun to fucking break stuff

>>723438917
Fag not fat, fucking autocorrect

>>723439045
drunk halo 3

good shit

bump faggots

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>I was always really well behaved.
>ROTC student so I never screwed around
>Stop doing ROTC and the end of sophomore year because it was getting boring
>Come junior year
>No need to be disciplined
>Be in history class with teacher who hated me freshmen year
>She's pregnant and leaves us with a long term sub
>Sub hates me too after she falsely accuses me of talking
>I feel like I need to retaliate
>Toss pencils into the roof whenever she looks away
>Toss pencil with a spiral and it will stick
>Other guys she falsely accused join in
>Roof tiles are covered with pencils
>She doesn't notice for 3 days
>We start to post pictures of random people on the walls
>OldLady.jpeg
>Smirkingnakedblackmanfromwaistup.jpeg
>Substitute finally decides to address it
>She can't connect it to a particular class period
>She just blames 4 guys and they all get disciplined
>One of them is labeled the mastermind even though he didn't do that much
>She doesn't include me
>I get away scott free.

>>723439429
stopped at ROTC
you people are the worst.

>>723439189
My friends and i occasionally go out and throw stuff and moving vehicles or vandalize construction equipment at night but thats about it these days lol

>>723439516
>>723439429
What does ROTC stand for?

>>723439586
OP here
same, during the summer we drink in the woods. Im well of legal age but bars arent my scene, coming out of the woods wasted usually results in a destruction spree of knocking down every mailbox in sight, picking up sewer grates and dropping them down the hole, and pissing on door steps.

My friends and i have been in the local paper about 6 times in the past 5 years for dropping sewer grates into the sewers. people thought nigs from the next town over were stealing them for scrap metal because they were too stupid to look into the holes. then they started saying they were traps for bikers and joggers, which i guess was kinda right

>>723439846
Reserve Officer Training Corps

It's a military class you can take at some American high schools to get elective or physical ed credits.

>>723439991
almost quads.

Ya its basically if you wanna train to be a militaryfag while still in high school

>>723439165
Mine was always really quiet and people rarely screwed around. I was always in there for stupid shit so the monitor never cared what I did. I still remember the ham sandwich, milk, and apple we had every day for lunch in there

>>723440109
and then when you go into the military everyone hates you because ROTC.

OP Here

Im out everyone, but thanks for reading my stories!
I'll share some more in the future
-shit terrorist

>be me
>pre-k
>draw on erasers and bookshelf in pen, get in trouble
>get sent to time out room
>some kid left open lunchbox in corner next to wall
>infested with ants
>sit for ten seconds
>get bored, try to think of what to do
>some kid in other room whines, teacher leaves room, friend gets sent in but teacher is still gone
>start scheming together
>decide it's a good idea to murder ant scavengers
>two 5 year olds kicking wall
>still no one coming into the room
>ants start trying to get away or attack us
>start kicking with the all of the force my little kid self could muster
>kick twice
>hear crushing noise, almost fall over
>tfw leg is stuck in the wall, gigantic hole
>friend has stopped kicking
>completely silent, no idea what to do
>still can't pull leg out of wall
>teacher is back
>ohshit.jpg
>teacher sees and immediately freaks out
>chews us out and calls mom
>the whole time my leg is still stuck up to my knee in the wall
>have to break hole the size of me just to get my leg out safely
>gaping hole in the wall, literally big enough for a homeless guy to live in
>school can't afford to fix it
>duct tape all over wall next day
>everyone heard about what happened
>everyone literally thinks i'm a superhero
>become revered among other kids
>catered to every my whim, get all of the extra snacks at snack time
>king of the preschool
>feelsgoodman.jpg

>>723431288
Fucking Sneak King I remember that fucking game.

>>723439183
Yeah I know

It's fucking rad

>>723440354
email fag here

dont forget about the email fag

>>723429063
>>723429615
>>723430078
>>723431288
>>723431827
>>723432327
has anyone capped this??

>>723440109
Well it's actually JROTC, shoulda mentioned that. J is for Junior.

But yeah, its full of try-hards who want to join the military. Most of them think they are hot stuff.

>>723439979
Holy shit dude lol. Destroying the portable was the worst thing weve ever done. We have done other stupid shit too like putting roadkill in peoples mailboxes and car door handles, putting gay porn in peoples mailboxes. Putting large objects in the middle of the road like tree branches, 2x4's, peoples garbage. Lol so dumb. That sewer grate shit is fucking hilarious lol, imagine if someone went over one on thier bicycle or something.

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>>723440360
>king of preschool

>>723441203
Saved whole thread (including shitpost replies).
Will sort through it at some point later.

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>be me, 9th grade
>just started attending all male hs
>classes ~300 each, only 4 classes
>upper class students wear red, under wear blue
>walking around hallways during first free period
>"hey anon we have assembly for freshmeat in 20 min"
>black kid, well call him tony
>tony is a /b/tard who can triforce
>fuckme i hate this shit
>go to assembly hall early
>something about 'being early' was enforced
>tony and I sit next to other /b/tard
>call him carl
>school keeps us waiting for 10 min past the time assembly is supposed to start
>get bored
>make paper airplane
>throws paper airplane across gymnasium
>lolfuckthisimout.jpg
>as soon as I get up to leave dean of students busts into the room
>"ANON PICK THAT UP"
>motherfucker spent 5 min looking my name up just to yell that
>tell him just this
>"well anon, it seems i wont have to look it up if you're going to act like that"

>>723441296
lol last one
>14
>sneak out with friends
>2am on a friday
>town is putting in new sewer equipment (we really like fucking with sewer equipment if you couldnt tell)
>long plastic tubing on side of rd
>lay tubing across rd and stack cinder blocks behind it
>wait in woods
>20 mins later a car drives up
>fuckyes.jpg
>car stop and faces off with pipes
>decides to ram it bc its plastic
>didnts see blocks
>smashes into blocks and we hear a giant metal scraping sound
>backs up and bumper comes off car
>some high school kid coming home from a party drunk
>so many lulz

>sophomore year
>blackout pep rally
>fyi: lights off, black lights, everyone gets glowsticks
>some genius decides to throw a bunch of fucking glowsticks on the court while the dance team is performing
>a few more follow
>then some more
>then a whole fucking hailstorm of glowsticks going everywhere
>AP carries out her threat to cancel the pep rally
>music stops and she gets on the mic in the middle of the court to chew us out
>lights are still off
>rocknroll.jpg
>under the cover of darkness i throw a handful of glow sticks at AP... however...
>lights go on literally right as I release
>mfw im standing around 200 something people with my arm extended having just thrown a bunch of glowsticks at the AP
>get suspended

>>723441480
if you could email me your results [email protected] i would really appreciate it bro

>>723429863
tits out now

>>723436754
Screencapped. Nice story, anon.

>>723441750
You're too late, """""she""""" probably already left.

>>723441711
[email protected]

fify

>>723441927
Its [email protected]
people call me nate higgers

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>>723437774
Done

>>723442005
People call you hate niggers?

they should, the only reason im asking for a screencap of that shit bottle story is so i can send it to piss bag kid lolol

>junior year
>out late at night with friends
>walking by old elementary school
>We feel adventurous
>hop the fence
>maybe 10:30 or 11 pm
>We go to the playground
>Poop on the slides
>Poop onto a bag and throw that into outside of a classroom
>Get away with it
>Do this on several occasions
>Never get caught

>>723442056
Well done anon

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It's 1:30 AM here guys.

Trips and I go and take a shit in the middle of my street with a timestamp.

>>723442665
Damn

>>723442665
rolleroni

>>723442665
Close enough fag do it

>>723442665
reroll

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>>723436754
This is reaching retard levels that shouldn't be possible.
I fully expected this to be fake but this is ridiculous, and you should be ashamed that you wasted your time making this dumb shit up.

include me in the screen cap

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School funtimes you say?
>Be me
>No specific age, all throughout highschool
>It goes without saying that the girls in my school wore revealing clothes, and I like girls
>In bathroom stall jacking off during lunch
>Used to get odd thrill from Jacking my Daniels in public
>Oholyfuck I'm gonna shoot
>Can't remember what (or if) I was thinking
>Maybe I was gonna get some TP ready to wipe clean but the fuse burned more quickly than I anticipated
>I only remember standing up, turning to a stall wall, and blasting my load fucking ALL OVER IT
>Sit there and stare at it, equal parts shock, waht, and even pride
>Bell ringing
>FUCK my next class is at the other end of the school
>Leave it there knowing it won't even be the worst thing the janitors will have to clean up
>Think about what I did and how great it felt
>"I could get used to this"
>Plus I didn't really like my HS at all so I didn't feel that bad about making other people look at and/or wipe up my family seed
>By junior year I'm basically performing my one-man show in the bathrooms everyday
>One day in particular I will never forget
>I tamed my stallion on the john as usual
>Finish
>But OH BOY STRAY SPURT
>I mean this particular cumblast just went fucking AWOL on me
>Then I hear the stall next to me
>"Bruh wut da fuq?"
>Did I-
>I think I came into another dude's stall
>Then this BBC fucking storms out of his stall and crawls under mine
>We stare at each-other
>He's on a dirty school bathroom floor like a monkey and I'm holding my dick covered in infant sauce
>He fucking loses his shit and goes monkey on me
>Tries to fight me
>Fuck that he's like 6'7" and he could use my scrawny white ass like a masturbation sock
>I fucking btfo and blend in with a passing crowd in the hallway
>MFW I almost died in a public school bathroom because I nutted on a black guy's new Timbs
>MFW he got in trouble for being loud and trying to start a fight

>>723436481
>At school
>Two weeks
>14 sandwiches.

Nigga you in Korea or some shit where they make kids go to school 7 days a week?

>>723443035
kek

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I break chromebooks at my high school and have broken over 30 chromebooks personally. We record us breaking chromebooks and think its the funniest shit ever. I once broke 7 chromebook screens in one class period. My and my friends collectively have broken maybe 80 chromebook screens easy. Once teacher we fucked up by engraving swastikas on screen and peeling off mouse pad and breaking all keys to several chromebooks and stupid ass tacher then realizes that they are being vandalized and not broken on accident lol. I am a suspect cause someone ratted me out. Out of all the $1000s of dollars ive vanadalized I admit to only rearraginign the keys and get off the hook with a day in detention. Still break chromebooks to this day at the seven happened after getting in trouble.

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>>723443035
>Stray Spurt

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>>723442665

>>723444013
There it is fucksticks

>>723443517

That wasn't a funny story. You just sound like a sociopath.

>>723426057
>>723426610
>>723427215
8/8

>>723442665
>what the actuall fuck
dud that's not cool

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>>723442665
>for fuck sake

OK, I'll bite

> Be in year 9, finally old enough to get a common room to ourselves.
> Just learned about PPC advertising. Writing bots to click my ads for me.
> Filtering catches me and bans by account after three months. Need new idea.
> Create basic porn website, every 4th image is a PPC link.
> Flyer my common room with little A6 (Softcore) porno leaflets.
> Horny highschool kids click like mad.
> Made $40. Fee like a king.
> FUCKYESIMMABERICH.EXE engage
> Sneak into IT room
> Print 400 full colour A4 flyers.
> Flyer my entire school with straight up porn.
> Goodbye Huffy. Buy a brand new GT mountain bike, nobody ever knew it was me.

Ok this one's not about vandalising anything at my school, but still me being a stupid twat who was out of his league as I somehow got into a private school.

>be me, 11 years old
>got new BB gun as it was my birthday over summer, decide to bring it in.
>pretend to shoot English teacher whilst her back was turned, she caught me out and probably saw it.
>She' as a total bitch, if you were caught talking with classmates she'd write your name on the board and put a 'black mark' next to it.
>One day I did something stupid so she put my name on the board with a 'black mark' next to it.
>Me being the obnoxious cunt I was, I said that I'd put a black mark next to her name.
>She starts crying.
>Dies of cancer 5 years later.
True story.

>>723444550
> Be in year 10.
> Two years younger than everyone else and bullied as fuck.
> Finally get sick of that shit decide to start fucking some shit up.
> KNO3+sugar melted into a rocket casing (great smoke bomb / rocket engine).
> Put 200g rocket engine inverted in vacant locker below bullys.
> Light that shit 30s before the bell goes.
> Common room fills with people, then smoke.
> GLORIOUS PURPLE FIRE!
> Everyones fucking screaming
> People crawling out of room so they don't breathe smoke.
> Teachers throwing water and sand onto it, but it's self oxidising and just stays alight.
> MY PURPLE PILLAR THRUSTS HIGHER
> Finally dies down.
> Bullys phone, books and clothes are charred and black. Look like that sat on the launchpad during a fucking Colombia launch.
> KEK
> School assembly called.
> People blame me, but no teachers believe them. I'm the innocent smart kid who studied hard enough to skip two years.

>>723445176
> Still in year 10.
> A bit bored and have two rockets left.
> Light both in the boys toilets.
> MFW it's spewing a few cubic meters a second from the windows and nobody is noticing.
> NOTICE ME
> Go to yr10 coordinator 'I think somebody is smoking in the boys toilets'.
> He looks at me, then the toilet block, then back to me. He's figured it out. He's figured it all out.
> They said they wouldn't expel me, but don't come back.

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>>723444550
Sneaky bastard

>>723445479
> I think somebody is smoking in the boys toilets
lel

>>723445479
> Same guy this time year 8
> People at this school are so fucking dumb.
> Pickpocket a cunts lunch money during chem.
> Heat a few 50c piece with a Bunsen burner till they are red hot.
> Put em inside fireproof mitts to keep them hot.
> Bell rings, walk into corridor.
> Dump coins on floor.
> Idiots try and pick them up.
> Screaming and hilarity!
> Some bimbo that wouldn't give me the time of day has 3rd degree burns.
> Highschool was fun.

>>723443517
well most of this thread has been great. this is retarded.

>>723429497
>be closer to the neo nazis
>"Stalin did nothing wrong"
>zozzle

>>723443517
mad retard breaking expensive shit u could be selling for mad cash

>>723427868
Read in movie monotone KEK

>>723445836
Another one from year 8.
> Fat bully cunt John and his friend Dinga think it's funny to put me in a headlock and hit me (hard) over the head with Chem books telling me to 'Learn Chemistry'.
> How dumb are these cunts. I already knew Chem.
> Fucking raging fire inside.
> Parents own a theatre company, I've been building flashing props for them.
> Take some parts home.
> One morning I fully charge 4x 600v flash capacitors, tape their bottoms and put em in my jacket.
> John puts me in a headlock.
> Whip that shit out of my pocket - one to the thigh, one to the calf and one to the neck.
> Didn't work like a tazer. Just burned him and hurt like shit.
> John flys in to a rage and starts chasing me, tries to kick me up the arse.
> I fucking lose it, grab a master lock off an open locker into my fist.
> Jump and bring the master lock down on his head like the fucking hammer of Thor.
> Teacher saw everything.
> Expels John and Dinga get's detention.
> Tells me not to bring dangerous shit to school, but good thinking anon.
> I liked that teacher.
> Highschool was fun.

>Be me
>Kindergarden
>Mean bitch teacher "Mrs. Williams" wants to read us Winnie The Poo.
>Me no want
>Get literally dragged out of class by Dr. Culverhouse or whatever the principles name was into her office because I don't like Winnie The Poo.

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>>723446462

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this thread is legendary

>>723443517
Yeah. You are a fag.

>>723435260
>stabed in the leg went home duct tape and cleaner

Kek

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>>723446462
I Spy Bullshit

>>723446958
lel, nope.

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Hehehe, I got a good one. Meant to share this for years now.

>be me
>14
>freshman
>taking art class, specifically focused on architecture
>art teacher is your standard old ass oblivious art teacher
>one day come in to find shitloads of random scrap from the woodshop
>the assignment was to make a cityscape from the scraps in groups
>group up with friends
>find three balls and a long rod
>glue them together as one of my "buildings"; pic related
>friends and I have a good chuckle over it
>art teacher storms over because of the laughing
>ohshit.png
>one of friends takes the fall claiming it was something on his phone
>quality_fellow.exe
>as she returns to the front, notices our art project
>specifically my dick building
>grabs it, goes to the front of the classroom
>fuckfuckfuckfuck
>much to my surprise, turns to face class
>"now class, anon has done an amazing job.thus is exemplary work"
>literally cupping the "balls" with one hand, firmly grasping "shaft" with other
>class is cracking up
>she's not sure why
>many high fives and compliments and shit
>king of the world

I thought that was the end of it until about a year later. To be continued