Alright lets get an alien thread going ITT: Convince people

This happened two weeks ago

> Be me
> Be 20 year old dumb NEET that makes decent cash
> Have 8.8/10 cute asian gf, no pics :(
> We take my old chevy out for a spin into corn country and get out
> We stare at the stars, doing all that lover garbage that I put up with to have sex
> Pull out my meme collection on my phone and show it to the sky thinking aliens would be attracted
> She begins to laugh her ass off

Cont?

> attempts to attract aliens with meme collection

I like where this is going

>>723380680
Alright I'll keep writing then!

> I make a few more jokes and she's rolling around on the hill
> Beta ass attempt to get into her pants phase 1 working
> I scream "ALIENS, MY PEPES WILL PROBE YOUR TINY ASIAN ASSHOLES"
> Gf says she wants me to probe her asshole
> Go to car and continue making Alien jokes
> Slowly unhook belt and pretend to look over her body like a specimem
> Bright flash blinds the shit out of me and girlfriend ( both naked )
> We collapse onto each other
> Wake up, aliens more or less raping gf while seemingly femalesque aliens tenderly loving me
> mfw I got cucked by space niggers

File: alien_mushrooms_by_reminisense-d8uobkf.jpg (390KB, 900x1238px) Image search: [Google]

390KB, 900x1238px

Mushrooms are aliens. Ask Terrence Mckenna.

>>723380980
Ha!