your worst sexual experiences >become close friends with

>>723268245
yeah faggot, what was the first clue? dont let your chick fuck other dudes you fucking subhuman piece of shit. You deserve to be cucked by some fucking chink/spic/nip

>>723268245
>got raped

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>>723268500

>>723268245
Either you'll always be shit in bed and you have a fucking retarded dick anon, or you know fuck all about where the g-shot is

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>>723268245
nice story

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>>723268500

>>723268245
be glad, turned out your ex was a hoe, have fun finding a good wife

>>723268245
I wish they would have all held you down at the end and made you cum on your own face and then the guy fucking shoots on you too just to make you want to kill yourself

>>723268245
Orgasms are not related to penis size.
Learn2Biology

>>723268245
Now i know what to do
Thanks anon

>about a month ago
>hook up with fat chick on pof
>it was not bad, surprisingly
>she hits me up a few fays later on her birthday
>on the fence whether I should accept her booty call
>go to her house anyways
>we get down to business
>10 minutes in I have an existential crisis
>realize this was a mistake and say "let's just be friends"
>she's disappointed but understanding
>try to watch Seinfeld reruns together but I can't shake the overwhelming depression
>"anon you look really upset" she says as I get dressed
>croak "h-happy b-day" and leave awkwardly

quite pathetic on my part desu

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>>723268245

> relationship is on the outs
> haven't had sex in over a month
> gf wants to reignite things
> suggests bondage
> I have to go first apparently
> binds my wrists and ankles behind my back and linked together
> doesn't seem like a very sexy position
> she teases "try to escape"
> I can't..
> her facial expression shifts "good"
> leaves the room and I hear a muffled phone call with some giggling
> she comes back and starts packing her shit
> *dafuq.jpg*
> about 15min later of trying to get her to talk there's a knock on the door
> she leaves the bedroom I hear more giggling
> in walks this wigger chad who laughs at me
> I'm furious but immobile
> "anon.. We're over" is all she says
> chad wigger starts making out with her
> I'm furious.. Crying.. Shaking..
> have no idea why she is sp malicious
> I watch her suck this guys cock for a few minutes then blow me a kiss
> an hour after they left my brother shows up
> she texted that we had broken up and he needed to help me (thanks bitch)

Seriously hate women so much.. Trust issues like fucking Jupiter huge.

>>723269096

kek.

op is a liar btw, welcome to 4chan newfag

>>723269110
LOOL

YE PENIS SIZE HAS NO EFFECT WELL DONE

>>723269239
That's some serious shit, man. What kind of person actually does that.

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>>723269239

>>723269239
did she strip you naked first? (pretending any of this happened)

>>723269293
oh no shit, I believed every story in this thread

>>723269239
Have you done anything to get back at her?

>>723268245
>going to have threesome with gf and cute Russian chick in college
>always flirted with this chick in class and shit
>dry hump her in an elevator walking back to the dorms
>start drinking
>walk in on her and my gf making out
>ok.GIF
>get going making out sucking tits and the like
>pull down her pants to see her nice big ass
>covered by I swear to god an inch of fucking fur
ignore it ignore it ignore it
>try to make out with her and grab her ass instinctively
>like petting a goddamned dog fuck this
>lay off, chick starts eating out gf
>go to finger chick, she is REALLY into it, but about a minute or two in I smell something
sneakily sniffs finger
>rip dick
worst pussy stank I've ever witnessed
plus hairiest pussy/ass ever
I just sat down and let the whole situation end
gf was terrified of having to return the favor
she got the hint and left
I took the longest shower of my life


>we're still friends that was just scarring

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>>723269478

>>723268245
I haven't seen this pasta in a while

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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

>>723269096
underrated post

>>723269527
also this chick was a bit of a hoe it was college and she would always have guys eat her out and it frightens me

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>>723269377
A megalithic CUNT does this.

>>723269448
She didn't strip. Just wanted to make her point that we were over as I wouldn't tolerate cheating. Doesn't get more proved than that.

>>723269478
Nothing. Wtf would I even do?
I've just taken up drinking more.

>Getting married.

>>723269527
hooked up with a girl like that once. unshaved, stank pussy. I've gone down on unshaved girls before, so I gave it a shot

the smell

started gagging, excused myself and threw up in the bathroom, got my shit and left her room.

Said I had food poisoning, but we both knew

Never talked to her again, just awkward nods when we'd see each other on campus

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This was during when I was with my batshit psychotic ex who was destroying my life

>driving people around, met these two girls and gay guy
>talking starts thtey suggest 3way
>fuck yeah!!
>only rule hegets to watch. No touching, w.e
>getting road head
>cant get it up much
>get there get to making out etc
>use toilet
>cant get it up still
>suggest a drink
>get head
>good to go with 70%
> can feel myself losing it
>one girl comes but she's getting fingered too
>lose my erection
>they actually giggle as I leave and say it's okay we'll just go find someone else
>go back to working embarrased af

I didnt know it at the time but that destroyed my self esteem for such a long time.

>>723269974
All you fuckers complaining about bad sexual experiences, when most of you will at least have the chance to find something better.

My wife was fucking hot, and is still pretty attractive to me, but we were young and religious and though we fooled around some, didn't have sex until the wedding night.

Before marriage? Horny all the time. We could barely keep our hands off of each other. After? The only times she seemed interested in sex were when she wanted to get pregnant. I knew she was using me, but I loved her/ was starved for physical contact. (I won't cheat.) I love my kids, but now that we are done having them, sex has almost completely disappeared and when it happens it always seems like a chore. The woman has literally 0 sex drive (I blame a combination of depression and the meds she takes as well as repressive religious upbringing).

We live in America, so all divorce would get me is poverty and no chance of really being with my kids. Idiot that I am, I still (usually) love her and have resigned myself to being lonely for the rest of my fucking marriage.

You can all go take your "bad" sexual experiences in shove them up your collective assholes.

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>High School, Junior year
>Crushing on a girl since freshman year
>Finally get with her
(Which is a story on its own)
>Date for a little kinda hinting at sex
>Finally happens
>Talking in my car outside work for a little bit
>Shit starts getting good and we both strip
>Her pussy has this really strong odor to it
>FuckIt.png
>About 5 minutes in she's getting close
>Right as she's about to, she fucking stops
>She stops moving and lays down
>"My head is getting light"
>Wait a little, and then continue
>Same shit repeats twice
>She gets a text saying to come home
>MFW when this happened again later on
After the 2nd time our relationship just fizzled out and we broke up

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>>723268245

The toothy blow job. At least the pussy was tight.

>>723269239
wow

>>723270009
KEK

>>723269110
baby dick detected

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>there's this hot chick at uni i want to fuck
>I dont know her
>somehow managed to become friends with her
>still want to fuck the shit out of her
>we're good friends now
>we go on a small trip together
>in a room together, etc.
>finally sex time
>somehow lost all the interest in fucking her
>can't get boner
>WHATTHEFUCK
>told her I don't want sex right now
>had some drinks, rest of the evening was still nice without sex
>she tells me not to worry
>okay i said i dont give a fuck
>everything's allright

we're still friends, but for some reason I have almost zero interest in her now. I think chances are we may end up having sex because she's into me. but I just don't have any feelings.

>fucked OP
>OP gets in love with me
> I say get out faggot
>fucked OP mom

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>>723268245
>Late night
>Everybody heads home
>I walk past some kind of old school, western bar
>Decide to try my luck with it, the place might be a new hangout spot
>Get some smoked whiskey
>Make eye contact with a cute redhead sitting alone
>Auburn hair, light freckles, plaid shirt and open cowboy jacket. 18 years old (I was 20)
>Walk over to her, chat for a bit. Says she's a park ranger
>She lives in the park, she takes me home to her place
>Big place, nice furniture
>Everything's great
>Old bear of a man opens the door and starts yelling
>It's her dad
>I have to walk home in the woods
>At least there's some kind of road
>After 10 minutes of walking the dad shows up in his car and apologises and offers me a ride home
>I take his offer because I don't want to walk for an hour to get home
>When he drops me off he tells me to treat his girl right

All in all, pretty neat.

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>>723269110
Now that's some good bait anon

>hadn't gotten laid in a few months
>drunkenly with friend's sober fat sister
>decide to take my shirt off and see if she'll fuck me
>commence foreplay, keep eyes shut because she's fat
>sit there working her tit while kissing her belly
>She says "ugh" and moves my hand up
I worked her fat roll for 15 goddamn seconds, thinking it was a tit.
>can't maintain boner after opening my eyes, and blame it on booze

>fucking another fat girl
>body doesn't like her
>rawdog that shit
>can't keep it up
>go wash up in the bathroom, and actually gag over pussy stank on my dick

>fucking ex in ass
>get shitdick

>>723270209
that made no sense at all

>>723268245
Holy shit. That hurt.

>>723269214
i know that feel anon unfortunately you had to hyperdrive the cringe by adding desu to the end

faggot

>>723268245
I know this is fake but cuck stories are 100% better when the bull fucks both girls and then he holds you down and cums in your ass whilst your gf and his gf make you eat his cum out their pussies. Just saying.

>>723270599
Astounding

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>>723268245

>>723269239
>>723269377
>>723269448
>>723269478
>>723270542

>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

>>723270342
>being religious

Lol, where is your god now, faggot?

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>>723268245
>letting another man fuck your girl
>ever thinking it was a good idea to begin with

You got cucked you silly fuck, hope you cry yourself to sleep at night thinking about how he satisfies her and his own gf now and your left with no one. Stupid beta faggot, kys

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>>723268245
>first tyme sex
>gf is not a virgin
>be 16
>go to my girlfriends house
>cuddle up, get in the mood
>foreplay, petting, massage her
>she leads
>puttin' in
>FUCK
>it hurts like hell
>I clench my teeth, try to force through it
>30 minutes later
>she didn't come
>I didn't come, dick still hurts like hell
>she throws me out
>get dumped a week later

My first, only and worst experience.

A couple years later, I learned that the reason it hurt so much was because of my phimosis. Went to the doctor, got some lube and stretched for a few month and am now fully functional down there.

Unfortunately, now, I don't have any desire to fuck anyone. There is no one I'm interested in and I thought about going for hookers, but I'm not a fan of neither the condom law nor having to spend money.

>>723270689
kek

>>723270342
That is way too real anon. Good job. When's the book being published?

>>723270842
stfu roody-poo

>>723270209
i've heard people having trouble getting it up but i seriously can't relate. i've gotten chubbed up multiple times just from hugging.

on the other hand 2 probably stupid sloots with their gay friend watching? i'd still get hard if my grandmother was watching but i can see the lack of hotness

>>723268626
IM SORRY THAT I LAUGHED
sucks if true. Sorry anon

>>723270342
I think this guy has a point. You can have bad experiences, but rarely ones that fuck up your entire sexual life with no chance of turning back ever. thanks anon, I was already against going out with religious girls, but I will now advice any girl to take as less possile meds as they can and of course, never marry. I don't know if a man can do anything for depression, maybe you should advise her to go to a therapist (what is there to loose in asking)

>>723270342
what a dumb fuck.

for the sake of your kids teach them to stop being a huge pussy ditch the bitch and go get laid LIKE A MAN

>>723270730
it makes sense that he thought it was weird that a faggot was checking him out and couldnt concentrate. I wouldnt really call that your gf though I think a bisexual slut picked you up and you clung to the idea that she was you gf because she sucked your dick once.

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>>723268626

>>723270578
herp derp only girls who find me repulsive are sexy

>>723271508
not all religious gilrs dont like to fuck. she's probably cheating on him or something.

>meet up with a trap
>we already did it once, but it was just a quick bj/fuck
>this time the plan is to do more stuff
>he gives me a good bj, same as last time
>tell him I want to try eating his ass
>we get in a 69 position, him on top
>finger him, finally lean forward and start rimming his ass
>both dick and brain go nope
>start losing my boner while I awkwardly finger him
>he wants to get fucked now
>by the time he grabs the lube from a nearby drawer I am limp
>he blows me again, I even start jerking myself off while he just sucks on my balls, but the best I can do is a half chub
>he still wants to get fucked
>probably because he can't take my dick when I'm hard
>sits on my lap and presents his ass
>fiddle with my dick trying to get it in, it's impossible because I only have a chub and he is tight
>get overwhelmed with feelings of shame, inadequacy and regret
>dick goes completely limp
>no matter what I do, it doesn't grow a single millimetre
>tell him this just isn't happening and apologize
>we both get dressed, smoke a cig and then I GTFO
I felt so fucking horrible. What really fucked with my mind was the feeling of inadequacy. I got a big dick and know how to use it, then with this trap I fail completely even tho his blowjob skills are almost on par with the best of chicks who have blown me.

Never hooking up with a guy again, this shit woke me up. Unless I meet a 10/10 shemale, then I'll consider her.

>>723270377
Why was she feeling feint headed?

>>723269239
She did you a favor breaking up with you (the bondage stuff was bullshit but does prove she's a piece of shit).

>>723268245
what a fucking cunt

That's sad

>>723268245

thats what you get for being a literal cuck

>>723270636
Is this some kind of obscure song reference?
nice story though.

>>723271337
go jerk off to cartoons of children fuckboi

>>723270689
>>fucking ex in ass
>>get shitdick
missed opportunity for epic atm.

>>723270342

I'm in the same boat anon.

No religious stuff. But mine was raised by a set of parents who were way too old to start having children. So as she grew up, she saw grandma and grandpa level parents. Not a lot of romance. At all.

This had the effect of turning my wife frigid and her sister into a whore.

She faked interest in sex long enough for me to fall in love.

Then it tapered off into trouble zone. Having to fight about it constantly. Then we got married because I'm stupid. Then we had kids because I'm fucking retarded.

Now I'm stuck forever with a woman who has 0 desire for me. It's fucking devastating to my personal confidence.

Robs me of any motivation to make my/our lives better. Why should I work my ass off? Why should I bother to produce or create anything of value for us when I can't even get my fundamental needs met?

Fuck women man. Worst goddamn thing to ever happen to me.

>travel for business
>get to hotel around 9 after a business dinner
>drinking whisky
>on my third when bartender gives me another, bought by "the lady in the corner"
>turn and see this soccer mom sitting in booth by herself
>cute, decent body
>sit and chat with her for a while
>now on my fifth drink
>she invites me to her room. I accept
>get in and our clothes are off immediately
>rolling around on the bed I end up with my face between her legs
>get her off pretty quickly. she was ready for this
>climb up between her legs and slide into her
>go soft immediately
>she sucks on my cock but it ain't happening
>try thinking about everything... from fucking JLo to the Red Sox winning the world series... dick stays soft
>tell her it isn't going to happen, get dressed and do the walk of shame back to my own room

>>723271807
so do you consider yourself gay or no?

>23rd bday
>my friends gf throws a pool party for me
>all my friends are there, everyone having a good time, im loving all the attention im getting
>starts getting late, the sun goes down and most people have left, just me and my two bros, his gf and this other girl I've been trying to fuck unsuccessfully for years
>we all decide to get naked in the pool
>her friend is leaving and asks if she wants a ride home, she says no
>at this point I know its on. boner achieved.
>we start making out in the pool
>I suggest we go get in the bathtub, I'm expecting a hot soapy fuck session
>she agrees and we go to the master bedroom, get in the tub
>As soon as I start filling the tub with water, I can see this look of regret on her face
>I try kissing her and she just doesnt seem very into it
>Maybe its the hard bathtub.. so I get up and we move to the bed
>Lay her on her back and spread her legs, again that look of regret
>I cant even get my dick hard because she's looking at me like she doesnt want it, and yet shes naked lying spread eagle
>try to mash my half-chub dick into her vagina, works for about 30 seconds
>shes laying there like a dead fish
>eventually I just give up and roll over. she gets up and gets dressed and goes back out to the pool
>the next morning i had to drive her home. didnt speak of it at all
>to this day I have no idea why she suddenly decided she didnt want to fuck me. we had been naked making out for hours. I was freshly groomed expecting crazy bday sex.
>we're still good friends but I will never speak to her of that night again

took my ego a while to recover from that one..

>>723271807
stop fucking traps. you literally fell for it. you arent gay you are just being exposed to so much gay shit now adays you think you are. in combination with you probably not getting sex much you have turned "priison" gay. go find a girl you are truly attracted to. you wont be attracted to them all and thats a good thing.

>>723272282
he's probably not gay but he's definitely a faggot

>>723272222
kill yourself for wasting quints

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>>723269296 it really doesn't have much to do with size. girls have different areas of the vagina that are more sensitive than others. seriously, quit learning life through porn. it's fucking degenerate and major level autistic

>>723272222
Penises are mysterious as fuck. Maybe your penis felt like it was ambushed by the Vietcong deep in the jungle.

>>723272127
anon for love of pasta ditch this bitch and go be a man. what is the point of living life this way?

your entire family is based on fear.

>>723272407

Also, just for the extra cringe factor (aka to save my bruised ego in the moment) I called her a "tease". She just replied sarcasticly then left

>>723272407
ahahahaa she realized you were shit in bed.

I just recalled this after my old principal died. My high school seems kind of strange after other people tell me about their high school experiences. Idk if this is weird but here goes. So every other day was a sexual intercourse day. It was supposed to teach us about sex. We would all have an orgy, including the teacher. Most of the guys liked it but the girls cried a lot especially the female teachers. The principal usually came in after a while to take the female teachers into hus office. We didn't tell our parents because it was awkward. We just figured they had the same high school experience too. I KNOW THIS SOUNDS FAKE BUT PLEASE BELIEVE ME ITS TRUE. Did any of you guys experience anything like this? btw the high school shut down in 2001 for undisclosed reasons. Oh and it's in montana if that makes a difference.

>>723272523
>kill yourself for wasting quints
my bad

>>723272482
this.

>get into foursome
>only way it won't crash and burn ego and relationship is if some random dude sucks in bed and has a tiny peen
You and your dick are brilliant at strategy OP. You one of them Fortune 100 CEOs?

>>723272282
I guess I'm still bisexual, just with ridiculously high standards for "dudes".

>>723272440
Nah nigga, I'm fine with my sexuality.
I was never interested into traps romantically, just a hole to fuck.
But yeah, unless she is a 10/10 trap I am not doing it irl again.

Not greentexting Soz
Always cum to quick three diffrenet partners

>>723272407
Did you eventually figure out what it was? Maybe it triggered some weird flashback of an unpleasant time for her and she couldn't get past it?

>>723268245

>having sex w/ gf
>going well, having fun
>'wanna change position?'
>bends my dick in the most unholy way
>'oh sweet jesus'

i have never felt pain like it. eh, we learned from that mistake.

>>723272561
>Maybe your penis felt like it was ambushed by the Vietcong deep in the jungle.
That's just a nice way of saying I had whisky dick.

>>723272523
>quints
yeah nice dubs m8

>>723269110
Top fucking kek
Been with my gf for 10 years
She never had orgasms from just fucking before me
>every girl that's seen my dick wanted dat shit in their puss
Keep saying dick size doesn't matter m80

>>723270342

She's cheating on you. Sorry.

>>723272607

Man, I never even got the chance to fuck her. Our "sex" was literally 30 seconds of me trying to mash my limp dick into her. It was over before it even began

>>723270928
Why are you a faggot?

>>723272627
and here I thought penis inspection day was unusual.

>>723272627
Greentext ducking teachers or other hot students

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>>723268245 op, that was your girlfriend just being dramatic. nobody fucking shakes like that from an orgasm. if they do, I would seek medical attention because that's just not normal

this should be a rekt thread

>>723272810
dont know somethings off here. were you shitfaced bumdrunk?

>>723272572

2 kids in america means I stay or I can kiss my money, half my shit and 2 kids I love very much, good bye.

I did this to myself. I knew what was happening and I married and multiplied anyway.

Sometimes you have to pay the price for being stupid.

Like >>723270342 said:

>>I still (usually) love her and have resigned myself to being lonely for the rest of my fucking marriage.

I didn't know you could end up feeling so fucking lonely when married, but, here we are.

>>723272841
b-but I've seen it in porn so it must be true.

>>723271244
How did you jerk off for 15 years or whatever, and never realize that sex was going to be an issue? You're a fucking idiot. Anyway, you're normal now, so don't worry about it. Get over yourself and go get your dick wet.

>>723270342
Guess you should've had sex before marriage to see what you were getting into. Well at least you can still pray

>>723272841
obviously but the fact that she did it for Chad and never for beta I believe it was done on purpose to cuck him. as evidence by his follow story.

>>723268245
OP, 7 inches is enough to make lots of girls feel "full". You are clearly doing something wrong here or have a pencil dick. Besides, most women can't orgasm from dick only, they need the clit stimulated as well. Anyway, the moment you or your girl fuck somebody else, it is over. If you ever do anything like this, it has to be with a fuckbuddy.

>>723272713
I have no idea. It wasnt the first time she had been hot/cold with me. one new years before that she made out hardcore with me at midnight, then later wanted nothing to do with me.

It's frustrating because I actually am pretty good in bed. Just for my own ego's sake i wish I had the chance to just go back and rail the shit out of her, but it will never happen now.

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>>723268245

>women never look at me
>meet a girl who does
>she's freaky as shit
>2nd date she tells me to fuck
>im about to lose my virginity
>my dick wont get hard for some reason
>she dumped me next week
>that was 3 years ago
>still a virgin

fml

>>723271244 wow, what a fucking bitch.

>>723271526
Agreed.

>>723270342
Do you want your kids to be fucking miserable too? GTF over your wife, who doesn't love you anymore, and go live your life. Not getting divorced because you don't want to lose your stuff? She's gonna cuck you in the end, if this goes on. Ditch the stuff, you can get it back if you have a decent job.

>>723272937
see
>>723273144

and no. I was drunk but not that drunk

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>>723270599
Looks legit

>>723270342
I feel your pain. My wife isn't religious or on meds, but she has had 0 sex drive for years. She never initiates sex, doesn't keep up her hygiene, it's just a bummer. We fuck maybe 3 times a year.

>>723273272
he's probably not the breadwinner.

>>723272736
You aren't Scottish then because whisky is an aphrodisiac for me.

>>723272811
Why are YOU a faggot?

>>723273129
+1

>>723270928
Aren't they supposed to laugh at him at some point?

>>723269239
Why didnt you call police thats against the law to tie someone down

>>723270342
Stay with her till your kids are 18. Then divorce her and fuck a 22 year old tight pussy in the new car you just bought.

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>>723270689
Fat roll titties.....

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>>723271203
>implying that trying new things will ruin your life 4 good

found the basement dweller.

I was 16, the woman was 33. She was the oldest daughter of my dad's best friend. The sex was furtive and clandestine, she couldn't afford losing her husband or his money. I couldn't be arsed to care as long as I was getting regular doses of what every other guy in school could only dream about. The bad part happened when the husband was going away on a trip and we would have her place all alone. The guy didn't leave on a trip, he just set his wife up. He barged in on us having some epic tied up sex, she was tied up and I was drilling into her brain through her asshole. She accused me of raping her. I know she had to save face somehow, but rape? Anyway he didn't buy it. He told me to get dressed and clear out. I think he finished the job for me but they got divorced and that cunt told everybody I drugged and raped her to keep from getting nothing in the divorced. In the long run it didn't hurt my standing at all with the ladies though. All the girls at school were proper up for a little rapey rape, i got all kinds of trim.

>>723269239

That's legally kidnapping if you asked her to untie you and she didn't. Get that bitch arrested.

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>>723270689 sex was never an option.

>>723273569
Optional but I prefer silence and the women just grinning.

>>723268245
My worst is precluded by my best.

>be 15
>have this weird on and off girlfriend/fwb/i don't know
>do regular dating shit like movies or dinner but if anyone asks we never agree on if we are or aren't and one or both of us goes through periods were we actually do date other people
>tl;dr generally dysfunctional relationship
Now that thats out of the way
>parents decide to do this weird rekindling thing
>month long program at some facility 8ish hours away
>only child left at home
>have a house to myself for a month
>fucking score
>skip half our classes for a week just so we can screw until the next day in the various beds and surfaces
>discover my shitty ikea chair is perfect for this
>has almost non-existant arm rests to not get in the way and its shitty single curved wood piece frame is extraordinarily springy
>takes the slightest amount of movement to get it going then all either of us has to do is move our hips just so on the downstroke to keep it going
>most effortless sex i've had to this day and it was amazing
>second we discover this we knew what had to happen
>fuck school the next day
>spend this weird afternoon into the night just having the most loving and romantic fuck i've had to date
>breaks are me just diddling her on my knee while we watch TV or play games or something while my dick takes 5
>never felt this close to her or anyone before
>exhausted pass out on the damn chair holding each other
>morning is breakfast then back to it
>can't say for how long but we spent damn near all day on that chair playing video games, watching tv, talking, we read books once, tried and failed to do homework, and generally chatted all while having this weirdly close but casual and laidback sex
>take a shower/bathroom/food break
>around 7 now
>make the executive decision to try and see if i can jackhammer without my hips giving out using the magic that is this chair
>works like a charm
>manage to do this shit what had to be 40 minutes
>finally spent

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>>723271935
>>723270636

Love of miiine
Someday we both will diiie
And I will be close behiiiind
To follow you, into the park

>>723273892
>dicks willing but my balls are bruised to shit and my hips won't work
>nope
>apparently she wants to see my hips ground into dust
>maybe 5 minutes of her giving it her all then i hear this nice snap
>blinding pain then a second marginally quieter snap of the wood frame on the chair breaking
>she's laughing talking about how we're bringing the house down and i'm just in shock
>something obviously wrong with my dick via visual confirmation alone
>dick feels like someone shoved glass into my dickhole and mashed it around on that particular area
>panic
>somehow convince her to drive my ass to the hospital using the one car left behind despite neither of us having ever driven legally before
>have to phone mom and dad for health insurance info
>"mild" penile fracture and bruised testicles ontop of severe dehydration
>get minor surgery to fix shit but apparently the blowout wasn't bad and the urethra didn't tear so prognosis and eventuality is complete recovery
>end up spending the next 2 1/2 weeks getting doted on by fwb while i sit with ice packs on my shit

>>723268500
I love how people are always under the impression that threesomes (and more) are like awesome and so cool. Do they not understand humans are jealous animals?

>>723268245
OP, you got exactly what you deserved. You are a low-life, instinct-acting-upon, dimwitted fuckface and your girlfriend isn't much better.

>>723268245
Damn OP that bad. It was similar for me...
> GF and I been dating 3 years, getting boring so we both talked about bring others in the relationship.
> She said she knows a girl that is single and could be down joining us for a threesome.
> Showed pictures of her to me, skinny red head girl with a tight ass.
> Pretty excited and never been with a red head
> She wants equal treatment so we also need a 3some with anotheer guy
>I have no friends that would be down
> She said she can look on tinder or something
> A week later she said she found a guy that would be down. It's a white guy with long hair
> It has to be this Friday, I said okay and arrange to meet at my place at 3pm. When I get our of class
> Friday comes, I get home quickly at 255pm to get ready.
>Walked in the door and heard moaning
> Walked to bedroom and front my gf on her knee taking that guy's dick from behind...
> "WTF is going on"
> GF turned, flipped her hair over and said "babe he showed up early so we figured we get started.
> Look at the guy, his dick is still inside gf, no condom.
> I said fuck that and started to leave
> GF chased me to the door and said "sorry babe I didn't know you gonna be upset.. what's the difference? We were gonna fuck anyway"
> I stormed out
> Realized I didn't have car key
>Waited outside for 40 minutes, guy still haven't came out
> I walked back in.
>They were still fucking
> Broke up with gf next day

>>723269239
run them over with your car anon. and then finish him off with a hammer

>>723273847
Yeah but then you have to tell the cops you got cucked by a wigger for a flimsy ass case she will get off the hook for. No witnesses except the wigger who will take her side.

Also
>2017
>calling the police

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>>723269110
>be me
>have 8" tool
>can give orgasams without too
>mfw i am GOD

>>723272127
Have the talk. Put out or you'll force me to get it elsewhere

>>723273013
Can't refute that, I was really stupid.

>Get over yourself and go get your dick wet.
I don't have any interest in any of the (there are some, yes) girls I know. And hookers cost money.

>>723273998
What did you expect?

>>723269239
Would beat both of them

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>>723273611
>>723273847

Guys.. Do you really think I want to tell this story to the police? And retell it in court? I'm just glad she didn't take pics and post them on fb.

>>723270565
Post your dick then faggot
>I'm not gay

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>>723272841
Yeah, because you've never had it happen means it's fake. Trust me, it happens man.

>>723273818
yo got molestered and you dont even know it.

>>723269905
Kidnap her, cut off her arms and legs.
Put her in a basement then tell her.
"try to escape"
Giggle and leave.

?????? :)

>>723270209
Shouldnt be such a beta faggot god damn

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>>723273818

>I think he finished the job for me
My nigga.

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>be 17
>frosh week at university
>still a virgin
>run into chick I used to live beside a decade earlier at a house party
>she got decently attractive over the years (7-7.5)
>we start reminiscing and drinking
>end up making out
>she takes me by the hand and leads me to an empty bedroom downstairs
>I'm obliterated drunk but who cares
>she pushes me onto the bed and takes off my pants
>starts to suck my flaccid penis
>dick eventually gets half-mast and she gets on top and starts to ride
>she's bouncing up and down like she's trying to rip my dick from its roots
>feel intense pain, push her off in drunk haze, she falls onto the floor
>Stare down at throbbing penis
>can see blood inside of my wiener
>bitch folded by cock in half and ruptured a sizeable vein
>She's apologizing profusely
>she offers to walk me home (walk me home...walk.MEEEE.home)
>go to doctor the next day
>"you broke your dick, anon"
>spend next three weeks icing my rainbowed coloured, swollen, bruised penis penis twice a day.
>end up having lab with girl
>MRW she's really nice about it
>MRW I go to extreme, autistic lengths to avoid her afterwards
>MRW we have a mutual friend (girl) that knows about and asks me if my cock is still broken a few years later

>>723270599
Twelvies these days

>>723272222
>Not getting off, from thinking of Jlo's thick,soft ass
I pity the fool

>>723268245

Hey it was a risk, and good for you for taking it. So it didn't work out. You'll get over it.

Monogamy is so boring. All you anons who flip out over group sex, etc. are missing the chance at something awesome. Or something terrible. But skydiving & motorcycle riding are kind of like that too, and lots of people find those activities worth the risk.

>>723268245
As a male with 7 inches, this story is clearly fake. The chances of your Asian coworker having a 9+ inch dick, and I haven't swallowed his cum, is literally impossible.

Got all drunk one night when I was out and about, browsed Craigslist for m4m otw home. Figured I was drunk, up for something crazy... responded to a swap oral ad. Ended up meeting up, after sucking the guy for a bit, told him I'd let him fuck me if he wanted. Had no lube, let the guy fuck me with Vaseline. Ended up being a huge mistake, fucking hurt like hell, told him to stop but he just fucked harder until he came in my ass. All I could do was lay there afterward in the fetal position. Guy got dressed and left... here I was, just sucked this guys dick, fucked until pretty much in tears, and didn't even get to bust a nut. Felt like a pussy and a fag all in one night

>>723268245
>not connecting with a like-minded woman on an emotional level and making them totally dependent on you so your smoll cock doesn't matter anymore

haven't had luck so far tho

>>723273970

>underrated

>Was working as security guard at a car plant
>Sundays are dead days, literally no one there but two guards all day
>Supervisor tries to keep from having male and female guards on together on Sunday
>The other guy ditched, supervisor had to call in this decent looking 20 something black chick
>I get bored in my booth, go to hers to shoot the shit
>She goes into bathroom, leaves door cracked
>After a few minutes "Come here for a minute"
>She's standing their with her pants undone rubbing her pussy
>Instantly hard
>She pulls my pants down and strokes me before bending over the sink
>Fuck her, cum in her. Sex was fucking great
>Be a nervous wreck for the next fucking month that I just knocked up a nigger and ruined my life until I ask her and she tells me she's not pregnant

>>723274700

>Around blacks, never relax.

>>723273384
And you're still there why?

>>723268245
The chick told your girlfriend about his dick. She knew all along. That's why she was down

>get with girl because feels
>total mombod
>stay with her because feels and too depressed to go do anything
>family is all dead too
>midwest
>no jobs
>sex was great sometimes
>other times not so much
>feels turn inward
>we hate each other a lot
>finally break up
>my life is potato

Seems like there's just nothing. so much nothing. I play music and stuff too and still nothing

>>723274791
kek

but seriously. this.

>>723273889
We got fucking David Lynch over here

>>723274835
more like his gf told her she doesnt get orgasms. and they devised a way to "show him" for his own good kind of bullshit.

>be me boy 15
>hook up with girl
>making out cuddling kissing in her room
>take off each others shirts
>kiss some more
>just wearing panties
>lie down
>"no im supposed to be on the bottom"
>???????? what
>???? how?
>things go from natural and instinctive to confusing instantly
>she has to walk me through it
>hate it feels awful and terrible
>ugh fuck sex.
>3 months later come over to her house
>"oh liz isn't home right now... want to play ps3?"
>hanging out with her brother
>idk things happen
>suck his dick
>let him fuck me
>10,000 times better than his sister
>welp im gay.

>>723271852
yeah, this story sucks

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>>723268245
Don't miss OP's newest episode next week when he agrees to give his new gf AIDS via threesome with a nigger

>>723272736
From what I've learned that always helps me, wear a cockring. Just keep one with you, that shit works wonders. Adds to my girth too which has been taken as a positive during sex.

>>723268245
this is my nightmare

its funny when it happens to somebody else though :p

>>723268245
ate a girl out but she tasted like pennies and bitter plums.

>>723270972
shit like this happens. this is what happens when you try to turn a hooker into a housewife. except its worse because they dont even get paid to fuck all these random people.

My story
> Be 19 yo, 198 cm (6 ft 6) overweight virgin, first time in a bed with a woman.
> She is little bit older, married and little bit religious, on the other hand, she is very pervy.
> We used to be great friends, and we liked to spent time together and we would text a lot.
> End up in bed together, i finger-banged her very good, I loved her moans.
> Out of nowhere, she started to cry and sob about her shitty husband (got divorced year later or so).
> I spent next few hours holding her and whispering to her, that everything is all right.

That was so fucking lame. I got my shit together, lost 40 kg (90 ponds) and got a girlfriend.
After 4-5 years I dumped her for nicer, prettier and taller girl.
Still together, 2 years and still together, and our sex is ok.

>>723268245
lulz given

>>723269296
>>723270565
>>723270669
>>723272745
>>723274104
If size matter, why are things like foreplay, oral, bullets, and Magic Wants so popular when they don't even penetrate? And if the penis is too big, it can hurt her. Call me names all you want but your shitposting tells me that you've never even touched a real woman. Otherwise, you wouldn't be so oblivious to their physical structure,
Cucks

>>723274551
>>723275117
in keeping with the gay theme

>brows craigslist for the first time
>see ad from guy looking to get fucked
>arrange to meet
>he's a nurse at a psych hospital
>arrange to meet Sunday morning. no one around at that time
>meets me at the front door of hospital
>he's at least 6-2. I'm 5-6
>he takes me up to his office/supply room
>small talk and then get down to it
>he bends over his desk
>his fucking hips are around my chest height
>get on my toes to fuck him
>trying hard but can barely reach his asshole
>maybe get a couple inches in
>calves start burning since I'm on my toes for forever
>fake cumming
>get out of there
>email later saying we should get together and try a different position
>he never responds

>>723268245
>go to op house
>fuck op mother
worst sexual experience

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Back in 2000 ish everyone I lived with had their worst sexual experience.

>Be 18-19
>Living in the ghetto renting a house for 400$/mo with 3 other people.
>An additional 2-4 people are pretty much living there too.
>Selling drugs and barely working to just live.
>Every girl in the neighborhood were sluts with huge daddy issues.
>Constantly would pick up girls because they wanted drugs.
>Pretty much bang these girls, and they would get passed around the house for the next 2 days.
>One day, pick up this cute emo native.
>We are all getting high, but I drink too much ever clear and pass out.
>Turns out the entire house of like 7 guys gangbanged her.
>Turns out she was 14.
>Turns out she told everyone she was on the pill and most people didn't use condoms.
>Turns out she had herpes, and the clap.
>I was the only one in the house who didn't get the clap.
>2 of the guys got herpes.

>>723269905
you could find the wigger and fuck him up. that would make her and him feel like beta bitches. but this happens to people that dont stand up for themselves.

Anyone got the greentext story saved where Anon wants to lose his virginity really bad, calls a whore up, who turns out to be a tranny- then ends up getting assfucked by said tranny and is too scared to try and stop him/her/it?

I fucking LOVE that one!

>>723275641
holy fuck you're old

>>723274396
the picture really emphasized your position anon.

well done.

>me 8 years ago 24yo
>fucking hot red head from kansas
> great body great little bubble butt
>lays down on her stomach
>sais "you can put it wherever you want anon...:
>poopchuteexplorer.zip
>cum in ass
>she had shit everywhere while i was fucking her
>shit all over her crack and pussy
>shit covered dick, balls and pubes


truth be told ive had a massive scat fetish since i was 14. its really a bad experience cause i just wanted to bury my face in her shit covered pussy and get messier but couldnt

>>723268245
That was a lousy and fake story. Just start a humiliation thread if that's what you're looking for.

>>723268500
>chink/spic/nip

chink/nip - difference?

>>723275641

Fake story, fake news. If a girl is showing or shedding the herpes virus and 7 guys fuck her, they all get herpes. There's no way around that.

>>723275820

Yes son, I was on 4chan shortly after it popped up. Drinking a mixture of 95% grain alcohol and grape mountain dew while shorting coke and X.

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>8 years ago
>be 16
>first girlfriend is some slightly chubby girl from school
>Huge ass and likes the same shit I like
>One day she suggests we take eachothers V-cards
>Aight.gif
>Take clothes off, make out, grope, slap, squeeze
> Feelin good
>She gets on top and starts riding me
>Rides me for like an hour and a half
>She starts getting tired, asking if I'm close yet
>She's came like 6 times
>I cannot cum, no matter how hard I focus on it
>Try to fake it
>She slides off, see's no cum in the condom
> I grab my shit and leave.
> Break up a month later.

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Wew lads mine pales in comparison to most of y'alls but here it goes.
>break up with gf as I was going to college.
>stole her virginity while dating so ofc she's heartbroken or some bullshit.
>visit home for mi papas birthday, I actually like my parents.
>get really drunk, somehow ex gf knows and asks if we can have hate sex.
>say yes, but I'm not driving.
>she comes and gets me at 3 am, we go to a pond/park place and fuck.
>bust rly quick because haven't had sex in maybe a month or two.
>halfway through 2nd condom I sober up to the point where I realize I'm dun goofing.
>tell her to drive me home.
>Cries as I leave her car.
>the end I guess lel.

>>723272627
uhh you should probably call 20/20 or some shit

>>723272841
Actually they do shake during hard orgasims. Get gud and you would know that

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>>723275945

Anyone have any stories of a 3 or 4 way NOT destroying their relationship or the other groups?

Every story I've heard from this shit hole has ended in misery so I always wonder "why?".

>be 19
>at some trashy house party with some friends
>Drunk as fuck
>this qt girl I've been flirting with for some time starts giving me the looks
>make out on couch
>people wooo
>we go downstairs into the basement
>start making out on a pile of laundry
>sexytime.mpg
>good sex, but drunk as fuck she says she wanna do anal
>after a lot of fingering and spitting I manage to get that dick inside her
>she is in obvious pain and it isn't any good for me either
>says I just have to pull out
>vacuum happens, out comes my dick brown as fuck, and a spray of shit from her ass, all over my clothes and the laundry
>she panics, pull up her panties and go to the toilet
>i'm covered in shit, all of my clothes and all the fucking laundry
>manage to find some dirty sweatpants and a even dirtier white tshirt
>go upstairs to GTFO
>the whole party know what happened, laughs their asses off
>From now on being called Captain Brown Beard by EVERYONE
>too ashamed to ever face any of them again

>>723275948
>hour and a half
Yeah fucking right you virgin stop lying. Condom would have broke or the friction would've made her bleed.

>be me 17 trap
>starting to catch lesbian feels for this girl in my math class
>smoke weed with her play vidya together
>she has a boyfriend but i hate him
>one day she asks if i want to go to a 4some with her
>with her...
>yes.
>things dont go well
>her boyfriend keeps trying to suck my dick
>keeps coming between me and his gf
>finally let him suck my dick because he wont stop asking
>feel this awful fucking moustache on my dick
>worst feeling ever want to vomit
>tell him to stop he wont
>just fucking push him off the bed
>he starts crying
>not cuz i pushed him
>because he loves the cock

>>723276083
I'm not 16 anymore and could give less of a fuck if you think I'm lying.

>>723273998
Damn rough. Those four penultimate lines though, funny as shit. Life doesn't so much kick you while you're down so much as stomp on your head eh?

>>723276289
>could give less of a fuck = you give a fuck
take your nigger double negatives and kill yourself you retarded faggot

>>723276083
Get a load of this retard.

When's the last time you used a condom, 1970?

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>>723276079
>Captain Brown Beard

holy shit my sides

>>723276092
>not cuz I pushed him
>because he loves the cock
i lold

>>723275912
and youre a child.

>>723268245
High school girlfriend gave me a toothy blowjob. Spit out my cum after I bust and started crying hysterically after. That relationship didn't last too long...

>>723272407
why even bother? perfect occasion to play the rape game.

>>723274187
if you don't do nothing about this you'll feel powerless the rest of your life.

>>723274092
personally i'd at least talk to a lawyer about my chances in court

>>723272735
kek !

>>723275584
alright virginanon let's set our dick size bias aside a moment.

all vaginas are different. i've been with girls that can't get off without some crazy all out effort, some cum multiple times from penetration in a nothing special session, hell my last gf had to put on jeans and dry hump me to get off. some like penetration, some don't

all girls(from my xp) like clittoral stimulation. <- that's a period. so toys like that work for everyone. girls that like penetration also like clittoral stimulation(to be clear) and prefer a big dick as, obviously, the stimulation in their vaginas is greater.

Lost my virginity to my cousin at 13... at the time didn't seem too bad... now I'm grossed out by it.

>>723276092
ya nah you probably got your shit pushed in and rolled off the bed and it was you who were crying.

>>723269239
That's fucked. I bet you even paid for the bondage equipment.

>>723270009
similar story while living in Vegas.. picked up girl (had out of town Air Force husband) walking down my street, she lived at apts across street.. wound up in my bed.. naked and going at it when my face got close, WHEW, not good.. she noticed, we stopped and she left... she came back next day, said she showered and all clean, she was right, i wound up hooking up with her regular for about 2 months till her AF husband returned home.

>>723276727
>issues detected

>Be at a party
>Some ugly fat chick brought a gay dude
>Gay dude is trying his best to pick up drunk guys
The night goes on
>I get dared to beer bong an entire 5th of jim beam.
>I do it like a retard.
>Go into a black out
>Wake up laying on my side in a bed with my half-chub dick inside nasty fat girl while gay dude is pounding my ass.
>Don't know how that happened.
>Too drunk to do anything about it.

>Get chlamydia and my ass is sore the next day.

LMFAO My uncle lost his wife the same way.

>>723273982
your dad was proud of you I guess

>>723274504
george takei is that you?

>>723275117
You mean you hooked up with a girl (boy) r- -right anon?

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>>723275641
Same fag, remembered something that happened to me.

>Be 14
>Stole liquor from parents.
>Was fucking cooking sherry
How the fuck did we have cooking sherry, we were broke as fuckers who made our own pancake syrup.
>Went to friends house to get drunk and high
>Fucking Sarah was there.
Now Sarah was this 22 year old short haired mentally ill 200lb fucker who "hung" out with my friend. When I say hung out, I meant he tolerated her and she bought liquor, smokes, and gave us pills.
>We are all getting plastered and I am chugging cooking sherry and vodka like water.
>Get so drunk that I wonder up to friends room to sleep it off a bit.
>Few minutes later, Sarah comes in and start looking at playboys.
>She waddles over to me and starts to take out my cock.
>Im barely keeping my eyes open at this point, but I get out a stop.
>She giggles and says I shouldn't
>I am absolutely flaccid and she starts to suck me off.
>I immediately vomit, and I mean a lot of vomit.
>She was covered in vomit with my flaccid 15 year old cock in her mouth.
>Few seconds pass and she screams, and runs out.
>My friends clean me up, and buy me a taco which we eat under a bridge while smoking pot.

That was the first time my cock was in a girls mouth.

>>723270342
your problem was marrying a girl who needs meds to function

>>723277007
first i hooked up with a (((girl))) and it was awful.

then i fucked her brother

>>723277007
It was a feminine penis anon.

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>Be 18 year old fag
>fool around with same age girl as fuckfriends
>She's kinda "free spirited" (a slut) and bisexual and all that
>Urge me to be bicurious as well
>Say hell no I don't like boys
>"But anon you haven't tried how can you tell"
>at some party
>drunk
>she says she wanna do the sexytime
>go into fellow girl friend's bedroom
>make out
>She says she wanna play with some ice and shit, so I have to be blindfolded
>blindfold me, and goes outside to get ice
>hard as fuck
>After some time she comes back
>starts playing with the ice cube on my balls and nipples and shit, kinda nice
>starts sucking my dick
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>grabs her head cuz almost cumming
>mfw it isn't her
>mfw short hair
>takes of blindfold, realize it is some gay guy she knows, currently sucking my dick
>totally freak out, push him back and then kicking him as hard as I can right in the face
>crushing his jaw and severing the tip of his tongue
>she just wanted me to be bi
>tfw I end up in jail for assault, they both gang up on me telling me how I assaulted him out of jealousy for "sleeping with her".
>Life ruined, have to move to another part of the country

>>723269563
Mommies little detective

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>>723277177
>fool around with same ape girl as fuckfriends
>same ape girl
>ape girl

>>723275945
33 here M8 been a wild ride

>>723276092
>be me 17 trap
>starting to catch gay feels for this guy in my math class
>he has a girlfriend but i hate her.
>one day he asks if i want to go to a 4some with him with 3 people.
>squeeeee!!!1!
>things dont go well
>his gf keeps trying to suck my dick
>keeps coming between me and he boyfriend
>finally let her suck my dick because she wont stop trying.
>worst feeling ever want to vomit
>tell her to stop she wont
>she starts crying
>not because I pushed her.
>but because she likes cock.

fix'd that for you.

>be 23
>meet 20 year old chick off pof
>cute but 30lb heavier than in her pics
>we bang
>shes on top and totally fucking pees on me
>i laugh
>she leaves the room crying
>a few days later she friends me on facebook
>shes 16
internet dating

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>>723272627

>>723269110
hows your small dick keeping anon?

>>723275092
kek

>>723277477
What... Man, I missed out.

>>723276950
HAHA what the fuck you got raped man but honostly you prob didnt the drinking just brought the gay out of you

>>723276006
"it seemed like a good idea at the time"

>>723272127
I've been with my girl for almost 2 years now. Her story is sort of similar. She has zero desire for me and I'm lonely as fuck all the time. I want to marry her because she's the love of my life, but the no sex thing has done irreversible damage to my self esteem. What do, anon?
I love her with all of my heart, but I have needs man..

>>723277391
Haha ya this is more like it the truth what a faggot

>>723272627
call the police see if I give a fuck.

>be at this party my fat ugly friend brings me to
>at least there's cute drunk guys
>some idiot tries to beer bong an entire 5th of jim beam.
>everyone tells him not to, but he yells "LOOK IM SUPERMAN"
>does the whole bottle
>passes out
>google how to save him
>"intrarectal administration of semen can help treat alcohol poisoning"
>have to save his life
>start fucking his butt
>he murmurs something
>cover his mouth
>inject life saving chlamydia deep into his bowels.

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>>723268245
>ex texts me out of blue
>had fight with her current bf wants to talk
>fuck yeah.exe
>pick her up in my van, she has a half empty bottle of wine she's drinking from
>small talk until we pull over by a grave yard
>end up fucking her raw on bench in graveyard
>some guy dodging a taxi fare cuts through graveyard and interrupts us
>drive to her place
>won't your bf be around?
>"It's ok, I've locked him out"
>fuck her in the living room
>finish inside
>suddenly see arm through letterbox trying to unlock door
>her bf
>quickly dress and act all casual
>she introduces me as her-shoulder to cry on-relative
>make my excuses
>wish them both the best
>shake his hand, my fingers still stinking of her cunt

mfw

> Cheating on GF for 2nd time
> My house
> bitch is a soccer player
> BangingLegs.jpg
> NoTits.jpg
> Making out grabbing ass and what not
> Whiskey Dick
> Try to cram my flaccid cock in her
> Shit doesnt work
> she's whatever about it
> 2 months later shes lesbian
> mfw I ruined it for the team

>be 6 years old
>need i say more

>>723277477
Holy fuck its like penis inspection day all over again

>>723268245
>sexual experiences
your lies fall apart so quickly virgin.

>>723272697
Are you me?

>>723268245
Is your image really Steve-O after huffing?

>be me fat ugly chick
>be invited to party
>take gay friend cuz scared to go alone
>he ditches me to go hit on straight guys
>all alone again
>some idiot yells out "LOOK IM SUPERMAN!"
>drinks an entire bottle of jim beam.
>passes out
>hear gay anon attempting cpr on alcohol poisoning victim
>decide to try to drain the alcohol out his penis with my vagina
>shhhhh.... we need to help you.

>>723275927
Big difference if you're one of those. They hate each other. Not so much if you're Whitey McGaijin.

>>723277853
whats so in-plausible about under performing in a 4some. and loosing your gf to a swinger couple that just wanted the girl anyway.

>>723276719
Can I fuck your cousin too if she's grill?

>>723277780
>female athlete
she was already gay famalam, no sweat

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>Guy at my gym gives himself bulb enemas over a trash can.
>He sort of does it in the bathroom alcove where he thinks no one is watching.
>He sort of grunts and moans says its part of a free and clear fitness plan.
>I thought it was kinda nasty.
>After awhile I started getting totally hard.
>I'm not gay, I chanted to myself.
>Decided enough was enough.
>*enough!!!.png*
>Hide in the trash can, burying myself in paper towels.
>Maybe a half hour passed and finally the guy was there.
>I was all numb end stuff.
>I looked up and before i knew it his gaping maw unleashed a waterfall of chocolate moose into my goateed mouth.
>It spattered my face, my eyes and I cried aahhhh at the bliss of it.
>I said it too loud cause he jumped and I heard peanuty goodness spatter the floor.

Kek--- http://zo(dot)ee/4EXe .....

>be me 16 at the time
>meet a chick
>she's depressed and shit. Typical tumblrgirl
>we get close
>one night i go to her house
>"so what do you want to do anon"
>i see a twenty one pilots poster in her room
>a minions tshirt on the bed
>mfw she is just a normie
>she gets on her knees and tries to suck my dick
>i look at her in disgust trying not to get hard bc i cant fuck a normie
>"what's wrong anon?"
>im sorry but i changed my mind
>we broke up next week


still a virgin bc everytime i think about sex it reminds me of her

>>723272697
why even deal with the stigma if you really dont like fucking dudes? youre beyond help.

>>723268245
Show the picture of your ex, his gf

Worst experience I ever had was when I was 19.

My then gf had been gone for a couple weeks out west visiting family in California. She wasn't there for my bday cause of it which I didn't mind. She comes back picks me up in her car and we ride around. Find some back roads and what looks like an abandoned building. We start getting hot and heavy and the deed moves to the back seat. We're in the middle of it when a loud knock comes to the window. Pissed off black woman is screaming at us. I scramble my pants on and she does too. Well come to find out this isn't some abandoned building but a god damn black church that just moved there recently. They call the cops and the cops laugh the entire fucking time. "Why would you have sex in a church parking lot?" a thousand fucking times. Go to court a week later and the judge laughs his ass off. Everyone in the fucking court laughs. I feel like a fucking retard. Judge expunges it because it's my first offense ever. Makes me apologise to the church and promise to never come back as if I ever fucking would. Church forgives me but laughs at me. Me and her break up over it. Mostly because her parents freak out and say I'm a bad influence. It was her idea. I wanted to do it at my house or hers. My mom freaks out, my dad laughs calls me an idiot. Worst sex experience I ever had.

>>723268245
>wanted to fuck this chick in HS but she had a bf so i never persued
>two years later im 19 in college and she is 17 senior in hs.
>she had bad break up and i white nighted that shit on fb
>come back to home town for winter break and we became a thing.
>find out her parents racist as fuck but w/e
>one night after a movie we go find a quiet place to fuck in my car.
>We were smashing and im about to bust and a fucking car pulls up behind us.
>im thinking shit its the police.. even worse
>its her fucking mother ohfuck.jpg bonerkill.jpg
>the mother looks in the window and drives away
>Im fucked.. im going to get reported to the police for statuatory rape...
>scared shitless for the next couple of days
>gf calls me saying her parents want to talk to me
>fuckfuckfuckfuck
>I go to her house and its just the mother there
>ugly fat bitch btw
>mean as hell glaring at me
>" I havent said anything to Kevin (husband) yet"
>im thinking the police are on there way
>dead silent standoff feels like 20 minutes went by.
>"what makes you think you have the right to screw with my daughter" she says
>another long pause
>I notice a chink in that armor plate glare shes been looking at me with the entire time
>Looks down hat my crotch
>"just leave"
>I bounce.
>mfw whenever i was around her parents you could here a pin drop
>mfw when she knew that her daughter and i were still fucking.

knowing how things turned out. if i could go back in time to that night in the car. i would have waited for her mom to look in the window before busting my nut in her daughter.

I was cucked before i knew what it was
>be me look good, but not alpha, basically beta chad
>meet super hot qt junior year highschool
>flirt relentlessly
>decide to hang out alot at her place
>one day im hanging out, she asks me to walk her dogs so i do, she gets on the phone idk with who
>she tells me she wants to head down the railroad tracks with me to a nearby chicks house that is even hotter!
>i all for it, we get there fucking amazing 2 super hot chicks flirting with me amazing, they are clearly in heat or something
>beta me doesnt make any moves
>go outside with them to walk around
>see a black senior they and i know
>stand and have small talk they clearly flirt with him
>we all go back to hot chicks house
>they both then hang all over him and flirt instead of me
>i try and flirt with the potential gf
>she literally ignores me passively and contiues to flirt with the black guy
>omg.jpg
>He starts kissing the other girl
>my potential gf gets pissed he didnt kiss her
>she leaves with me as black guy proceeds to fuck other girl
>find out a week later from girl that slept with black guy, that my potential gf fucked him a couple of days after
>he continued to basically be their fuck buddies
>i went pussyless till my senior year because of that.
>my potential gf eventually told me she had a crush on the black guy and we where done
>he continued to sleep with them both, the next year he and i talked awkwardly, he basically said he was sorry for fucking her and then he literally bragged about it, fucking humiliated me

My senior year i found out about cucking and the whole interracial thing, i realized i was totally cucked. By the time my senior yea came i was alpha.

>>723272127
Never trust christians, man

Be me
18 yo senior in hs
Girl from school texts me I should come over
Sneak into her room and we start messing around
She's pretty innocent which feels good and bad
Too innocent, declines to suck my dick
Start fucking her, only then realize she's on her period
Unwrapped dick soaked in blood
Decide to soldier on
In the middle of it a cat jumps down scaring the shit out of me
Adrenaline is pumping and dick is limp af
Can't get my dick hard again, leave in shame

>>723271935
Nah.
Thanks.

>>723270342
Dude I left my wife because of that. Got two boys with her and I still see them regularly. Also I have more money than ever and a gf that craves my dick and we do everything together. And she's 5 years younger than me. Best decision I've ever made

>>723278586
It won't let me post in greentext on mobile for some reason

>>723277695

I'll tell you want no one told me.

Run for your life. Run for your mother fucking life.

NOW. NOW. NOW.

If you're not married and don't have kids. You have no reason to stay. RUN. GO. NOW.

>>723270342
She is 100% cheating on you

>>723275948
i think it's a common fact that the first time guys basically never finish.

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>>723270689
>I worked her fat roll for 15 goddamn seconds, thinking it was a tit

>>723277214
kek

>>723276666
SATAN HAS SPOKEN!!!

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>>723272841
It's a real thing anon.

>>723276092
did you even try when your brain made that garbage up?

>be me, femanon (yeah i know, but no timestamped pictures of my tits or sharpy in the pooper, so don't ask) 14 at the time.
> Have huge crush on friends older brother, but to shy to do anything about it other than masturbate and dream about him
> Get invited to pyjama party with other friends at her house. Five Girls in all. We do the usual talking, giggling and dressing up stuff, till it's pyjama time and we all change into our babydolls and slippers and sit on the floor telling war stories about the stupid boys we know.
> One girls tells her story of her first blowjob attempt, anothe talks about the first time she got her pussy licked and how great it feels.
> I have no sexual experiences yet to share, so I just sit there and listen.
> We play spin the bottle and we kiss some, I end up having to kiss my friend. She goes for the tongue and her hands are all over me grabbing my pussy and it goes wet in a flash.
> Confused..
> we go to bed eventually, but my mind keeps going back to that kiss and I feel horny the rest of the evening.
> Can't sleep. Seems like no one else has that problem. Still horny, decide to carefully rub one out. Feels great for a few minutes, then friend stirrs and I'm too spooked to continue.
> Get out of bed and walk to the bathroom, need to get rid of this feeling or else: no sleep!
> rub one out on the toilet. Feels so good I can't control myself and moan too loud.
> Friends brother catches me in the act and takes picture with his cellphone with me two fingers deep in up to my knuckles
cont..

>>723277391
more like the truth except it ended with a train, gf in front, trap faggot in mid

>be me
>get born
>dick never reaches a vagina that close again since

>fml

>>723272627
even if this was true, you're a humongous faggot so that invalidates a lot of things.

>>723272735
virgin gfs will do that to ya

>>723275117
I suppose I should be used to these stories by now...

>>723275092
I actually love David Lynch films. Kek you got me.

>>723279477
> Says nothing, just walks away.
> Feel so embarrased! Walk back to my bed and eventually fall asleep.
> Next morning, gather my stuff and go home.
> Feel depressed.
> Friend texts me, says we need to talk about something and I should come over.
> Don't want to, but have to go
> Get there, house is empty, just her and her brother. Phone is on the table, screen turned on and picture of me is on it.
> Heart sinks
> Friend tells me she has a crush on me, but doesn't want to be known as a lesbian.
> Says she'll share the picture if I don't have sex with her. Brother wants to watch.
> Have sex with her while her brother jerks off. Somehow like to be watched by him as she fucks me with her fingers, so not all bad.
> Then I see it. He's not watching me. He's watching her!
> Suddenly I feel raped and used. Get so angry I start yelling at them to just fuck each other and leave me out of it!
> Put on my clothes , crying the whole time, and ran back home.
> Next day my picture is shared with the whole class

My life was over at that point..

>>723279956
>>723279477
didnt happen

10/10 thread, would read again
haven't laughed at /b/ in a long time

>>723279956

post pic please

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>>723272745
>she never had orgasms from fucking before me

That's what they all say, anon.

I'm willing to bet she doesn't actually orgasm now.

>>723280053
You have no idea how much I wish you were right about that...

>>723278679
Its not that simple man... What about the feels? We've been through a lot together. And she's my best friend.. And when we do have sex, its 10/10. But its extremely rare. It would feel wrong to give up something special just because of the lack of sex... But its also killing me on the inside. And the worst part is, I don't think she cares about my needs...

>>723279956
yeah right bitch

>>723276092
I'm getting really fucking tired of this website....

>>723268245

Hire assassin

>>723280222
trips make it true
time to re analyze your situation

>>723280084
Read the post. I was 14 then, and even if I would be so dumb as to post that picture here of all places, it would be illegal. So: no..