Post your best money making schemes/ideas. I'll start:

>>723004082
post shit on redbubble

>>723004082
By a duplex, live in 1 apartment and charge 3/4 of the expenses to the other.

>>723005120
>>723005120
Not bad.

How about this?

Take a shit and sell it to people.

>>723005249
Its even better if you bother to get a roomate in your apartment. Charge half the rent in the other apartment and you come out a couple hundred ahead every month, plus build equity

>Build up reputation on tumblr by posting overly artsy gore photos
>Be sure to claim you are disabled with no way of working despite all the cons and meetups you've been to
>Claim to be struck by crisis affecting the one family member who didn't "abuse" you

Seen this happen multiple times at this point. Not sure what's stopping me.

>>723005567
This is a real thing? No way!

>>723005249
I kinda used to do that. When I was 16 I found out old gay men would pay me a whole bunch of money for piss. Everyone I tell is always horrified until they find out I was being paid $80 to piss in a cup.

>>723006032
Do you think I could do this nowadays?

>>723006249
Probably, it was not hard at all to start up the first time. Most of my money was coming from 2 dudes who would hit me up about once a week/every other week. It was nice to make that money since I didn't have a job at the time and I could pay for weed and booze. Once I had a job I didn't need to do it though, so I just kinda stopped.

I am a 26 y/o guy and in really good shape. I post a Craigslist ad for an erotic professional massage (I have no massage experience) I just oil them up rub their back for 20 minutes and jerk them off. I live in a large city and have a few regulars and get $100 for the our. It is mostly creepy old guys but at my actual job I get paid $13 an hour so it is easy money.

Farm elephants for ivory and meat

File: simp.png (1MB, 1816x1760px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1816x1760px

>>723006672

wow $13 an hour to jack off old creepy dudes. stay in school kiddos

File: avPM73M_700b.jpg (134KB, 600x937px) Image search: [Google]

134KB, 600x937px

Say their money help ends Women Sufferage. Pic not related

>>723006672
I'm trying to make 20k. Would it be possible to find enough clients to jack off 200 dudes at 100 dollars a piece or would I get caught or in trouble?

>>723005746
Tumblr has 2 things in spades, "disabled" people and people who's parents just give them money, I saw someone on there with a donation post who's parents bought and continue to pay for their apartment. So there's plenty of people to through a pity dollar and the best part is no one is going to call you out because no one wants to risk being seen as an ableist.

>>723007163
Someone can't read

>>723007163
No you idiot that's his working wage, he gets $100/hr from the old dudes. Doesn't matter what you gotta do one hundred tax free dollars is a hundred tax free dollars.

>>723007412

what about all the cam whores on tumblr?

flareon420
godshideouscreation
shay-gnar
thcolleen
paradisiak
psychedleic-freak-out
stonerjpeg
kawaiidabber
veraisastoner

all those hoes ^^^^^

>>723007168
Valkarie is the best, requesting more pics

>>723007630
so murdering someone for 100 tax free dollars is still 100 tax free dollars?

sell baseballs painted as ice cream to kids

>>723006032
drug tests

>>723007787
Yes

>>723007787
Are you shitting me if I knew I would get away with it I would do that so fast.

>>723007688
Sorry only pic

>>723005120
>rent to hot girl - drill hole from one duplex to the other

>>723007215
I only do about 2-3 each weekend so you wont get rich but its easy money. I used to do around 10 a week but only have the regulars now.

>>723008052
>>723007950

you faggots are pretty pathetic if you'd KILL someone for $100 dollars. "if you could get away with it" you'd probably spend more covering up evidence you fucking NEETS

>>723007874
dammit what show was that...

>>723008066
:'(

>>723008308
If i don't know the person then my life is wholly unaffected by if they live or die. Add money to the equation and now I have 100 dollars to gain from killing them and nothing if I don't. It's not that I'd kill for $100 it's that I'm passing up on it by not doing it. And whether you are a NEET or employed having a spare wad of cash is always nice.

>>723004082
what platform do u start this on

File: mfw.png (71KB, 417x402px) Image search: [Google]

71KB, 417x402px

>ask friend for a drug dealer
>ask for name and home address
>report to police
>get 450 dollars or so
>buy new camera with the money
>make bad youtube videos made for the humor of a 5 year old, toy review type stuff
>get millions of views
>make 5k a month
>everyone is puzzled on how i got this many veiws

it all started with a drug dealer
mfw

>>723008924
Anywhere that will allow you to host a donation page/link to one. Being a tumblr trans person who can't afford transitioning is a shoe in.

>>723008308
not if you live in the woods like me, just bury it off the side path of some hunting trail.
Its really easy in alabama

Start a religion.

People will donate to you over and over again, without requiring that you do anything tangible for them. And every one of those donations is tax deductible.

Best. Scam. Ever.

>>723009152
hmm, im thinking of finding old fucks on omegle, thoughts?

>>723009418
I would but that requires work that I don't want to put in. Plus that literally is greasy as fuck to the point where nobody will respect you outside of the religion. I am not trying to ruin my reputation lol

>>723009418
sounds good in theory however i wouldnt say popularizing a religion is easy

>>723004082

That guy has pancreatic cancer :C

>>723009436
Just tell any woman or sjw (doesn't matter which) that it ends women suffrage and they will start donating as if your St. Judes

I went to College for 4 years and work a shit job making $15 an hour. My sister is a cam whore and has a nice apartment and a brand new car and smokes weed all day, so if you are a hot chick just do that.

>>723009700
HAD. He HAD.

>>723009436
Well if you wanna scam on omegle I'd pretend to be a kid, get some dirty talk out of them, then hold the log as ransom for however much you want. Worst case scenario they say no, you find a nearby police station with their IP and you get a pedo off the streets. No downfalls.

>>723009721
example of this?

>>723009870
hmm how do u get an ip of omegle?

>>723009894
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQJQ--T4U0c

>>723009821

Oh, he died?

>>723009981
Get Wireshark, youtube will tell you how to do the rest.

>>723010054
People don't survive pancreatic cancer. Once you get it you have two choices, medical euthanasia or staying around in order to get donations for a foundation before you go.

>>723010339

Well, according to his wiki page, he's actually still alive. So he still has pancreatic cancer, it just hasn't killed him yet.

>>723010028
kek does that really work online

>>723009894
I will not lie to any of you. I got the idea off of YouTube. This one video showed these two guys going to some college campuses and try to get people to sighn a petition to end Women's Suffrage (which is the women's right to vote, they tend to confuse suffering with suffrage) and got a ton of signatures from unknowing sjws

File: sK1hdqg.png (264KB, 692x527px) Image search: [Google]

264KB, 692x527px

>>723008704
>Says the guy who probably works retail, if at all.

Get a real job where you don't have to debate killing someone for $100.

File: e2e.jpg (21KB, 375x423px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 375x423px

>>723004082
> Tfw you realize he's been wearing a prosthetic chin nose and wig cap and it took you a decade to realize it

>>723008148
> not just drilling the girls hole

>>723010495
I never was debating this, I'd do it no questions asked. And hey no shame in entry level jobs someone has to do them.

>>723008301
How'd you get your dad and uncles to pay you for petting your John Thomas ?

File: 1419175617951.jpg (50KB, 553x710px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 553x710px

>>723010609
Exactly what someone working one would say.

Go to training or learn a skill so you don't have to debate killing someone for $100. If you smoke weed, have minimal self-control and stop 'til you get a good job.

Here's what I would do since I live in the area.
Go to Yellowstone, find a nice empty field or one with a few animals, start what's known as a "Bear jam" (where tons of cars over on narrow road to see wildlife), pickpocket till I can't carry any more goods, drive the fuck away.
It's super easy to lean in close to and even touch stupid Chinese tourists while you're "pointing out the biggest moose you've ever seen".

Even if I had a career like what you're going on about I'd still kill someone for $100

File: really.png (437KB, 712x540px) Image search: [Google]

437KB, 712x540px

>>723008704
everytime someone dies before their time it fucks up the world. Everyone is connected to other people, to jobs, to places, to things (but most importantly, to other people). Sudden removal from that, especially death, leaves a gaping hole in the world, like when you poke a hole through a spiderweb, the whole thing gets weaker. It's a completely horrible thing to do, and anyone not completely retarded can see that. Plus the amount of work it takes to get away with murder is staggering.
The going rate for a hitman in the 80's was 25,000 dollars, more if they were someone important. Only a complete retard would kill someone for anything less

>>723004082
Brianna wu, is that you?

>>723004082
That's a good idea OP, I think Coppercab already did that though.

>>723009090
That's cool but I can do one better

> Bored
> ask friend for dealer etc
> buy secret camera ahead of time
> bring 5k in a duffle bag
> ask dealer who his guy is
> set up meeting with his guy
> tape everything
> go to the wholesale guy
> this time bring 50k and a machine gun
> kill a drug henchmen to prove I'm serious
> use my slingshot and not machine gun to prove combat skills unseen in this turf
> shut the tape off for that part
> practice on homos and hobos in the park before
> Don't tape that either
> anyway meet wholesale guy and he sees I'm serious
> Tell him it's his opportunity to make it big and he's the lucky guy
> ask him for his contacts and produce a live feed with a friend
> friend is in a remote location with 500k cash
> get flown to some backwater South American country
> brought Willies in case
> brought licorice too for snacks cause good travel food
> Get a tour of a compound and a manufacture facility
> do blow not on tape though
> strike a deal and return to the states while drug mules bring drugs so I still haven't committed any serious offenses to society really
> return to the states
> Immediately turn everything over to the local Mason lodge and a conspiracy theorist
> Mail my backups to the CIA
> Wait 4-6 weeks plus shipping and handling
> get invited to a bunch of spook events to speak about my daring operation
> hipsters call me night and day with leads

And that's what my job is writing for VICE

http://anti.capital/v/Hya6WhmKl

Hahaha... I think I got you all beat.

>>723012004
Wtf?

>>723011613
Well I'm not a hitman and humanity can be damned for all I care. The "do x for y" usually comes with the assumption that you won't get in trouble for x and simply have to live with yourself afterwards and I can live with myself after that. I hate people and causing emotional pain gets me off to an extent so I get all that plus $100 dollars in my pocket. Does that make me a sick fuck? Absolutely but I get what I want out of the situation and at the end of the day that's the best a self preservationist can ask for.

>>723011613
Wow, someone said something smart on /b/

>>723012331
you are either a larping edgy btard or a hobo. Fuck off and let the adults talk for a bit, eh?

I've made a few grand off of vending machines.

>Bought an old vending machine at a garage sale for $90, had to move it myself.
>took it to nearby park with outdoor power
>Plugged it in, calibrated it for $1.50 a soda can
>Buy soda cans at Costco, comes out to about 20-35c a can depending on the sale.
>restock daily in the summer months.
>Wear a bright vest while restocking so no one comes up and questions you.

Had it up and running for about a year and a half before the city came and removed it. Made probably around $1200 off that one.

Since then I've bought and installed 12 vending machines in various locations around my town, and have been doing this for almost 6 years.

Occasionally I'll get approached while restocking and be told I cant have a vending machine without a permit or whatever, cant put it on public property, ect. So I just move it to a new location.

I've been pulling around 5k a month from the 11 soda machines. The 12th is the newest one, its for snacks, havent figured out profit on that one yet. Chips sell fast though.

>>723012741
I'm just someone with anti social personality disorder, you're thinking too hard.

>>723012828
this is a pretty gud idea
seems like you could get in a bit of trouble though

>>723013162
Worst that has happened in almost 6 years is Ive had 3 machines broken into, and the city has just straight up stolen 2 of them my first year of doing this.

After the second one was removed I started printing off "permits" I made in Microsoft word and taping them inside the glass, havent had one removed since. I also put inside "Smile, you're on camera" signs, and that seems to have deterred people from breaking into them.

A cop also told me I would be fined up to $1,200 if I didnt have it removed.

Other than that no trouble so far. I've considered going legit, but this is easier so far.

>>723012331
Can i have your autograph pwease mister big scary hard man?

>>723013636
When did I saw it made me hard or even glorify it though? I'm just saying I'd do it because in my eye's it's easy money if I don't know the person.

>>723012828
Good plan.

>>723013631
Also, most of them have been there so long, city workers and police men use them and just havent questioned where they came from. They know they get restocked, and they see the fake permit, and who really sees a vending machine and goes "Is that there legally?" Or "Who put that there" theyre just out doing there job, see a vending machine and are like "Oh cool, I could go for a soda".

I've talked to a few city workers about it, asking who installed it and how nice of an addition it was to the park, they dont know, they don't care, and they enjoy it being there.

I figure, I'm helping people out, providing a good, and its not hurting anyone. There are no other machines Im stealing business from, and people who use the parks use them and like that they are there.

No harm. No foul.

>>723012272
[email protected]. HMU