long time autist first time poster. Mum cleaned my room and found my home made wooden dildo. She hasnt said anything to me but i know she saw it because it was in a different spot. How do i get out of this without coming off as a faggot
>>722785116
Pretty basic construction op, very little prostate stimulation.
>>722785116
Tell her you gave up MLP for hunting vampires.
Buy a real dildo. When she finds the real one she'll be relieved to know that this one is "not actually a dildo"
>>722785116
Topkek. What about splinter m8? Also if you took the time and initiative to whittle a fucking dildo, youre gay. So don't worry about her realizing youre gay, cause youre gay.
>wooden dildo
That sounds really painful. Imagine the splinters.
I wouldn't guess it was a dildo
Grow up. Clean your own God damn room. And while you're at it get a job and move out of home.
>>722785116
I read that as you found your mom's dildo
Then I realized it's your dildo and I thought you were a girl
Then I realized you're a dude... I need to stop drinking
>>722785116
Could easily pass as a really big pencil
>>722786062
dont worry drunkfag #2 here forfor keks
>>722786315
>fuck
>>722785116
she probably doesn't even know that it's a dildo.
>>722785116
why wood?
>>722785116
"Mom, have you seen my vampire stake?"
>>722786655
Kek
>>722786655
Top fucking kek
Is that a mother fucking table leg?
>>722785116
Tell her you were trying to make a carpenter pencil
>>722786757
>>722786728
>>722786655
Samefagging
>>722785116
Tell her it is the nose cone for a model rocket you are building (Which you now have to build)
>>722787073
How long have you been stupid?
>>722787372
Might pass
>>722785116
Tell her that you were making a few plumbs for shop class and forgot where you put it.
It works on two levels:
1.Woodworking is manly af!
2. You're actually making notches for your pleasure, homofag.
>>722787463
how much you makin on your stocks?
>>722787801
About 200-400 a day. I swing trade
>>722787984
nice
>>722787984
newbie here, i just got into stocks the other day. how often do you buy the dip
>>722785116
Its a part for some bullshit project your working on
>>722787463
>5 tabs open, all /b/
>Friday night
>normalfag not detected
>>722788224
Very often. Morning dip 9:30 to 9:45 on a well studied stock is the way to go.
>>722788249
kek never claimed to be. Im an obtuse motherfucker
OP back to answer some questions. Its sanded to 800 grit so no splinters. I have real dildos but wanted somthing wider. One guy said is that a table leg. It was once lol. I said it was a home made exhaust plug for my dirt bike, pic related. I think she bought it. Maybe dildo never even crossed her mind because who the fuck has a wooden dildo
>>722785362
Once i buy a lathe i can add ribbing
>>722788567
you have one.
>>722786934
>>722788567
if dubs wooden dildo up pooper
>>Make three more and use them as legs for a tv dinner tray. Vola your off the hook
>>722785116
I dont think she will have thought it was a dildo
The fact youre male will make it even less likely she saw it as a dildo, she'll probably just think
>wonder what this is for
You may be a sexual degenerate who grew up in the internet but your mom isnt and didnt assume what you would