>24 years old and a virgin >6 years away from wizard status

>>722418256
>be me
>Busted it at 15
>fucked or gotten head from at least 500
>laugh at faggots like you who think it is a status symbol to be a beta pussy at 24

>>722418398
THIS IS NOW
>Things that has never happened thread

File: 1354041867983.jpg (4KB, 104x104px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 104x104px

>>722418398
Poor fool, for he knows not what he is missing.
You shall never know enlightenment!

>>722418256

>32 year old virgin

>feels fine

File: 1457299103707.jpg (85KB, 620x618px) Image search: [Google]

85KB, 620x618px

>>722418398
here's that (you) ya wanted so bad, Anon

File: 1358322980500.jpg (50KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 640x480px

>>722418944
The dubs prove he is a wizard!

File: yamazaki-NHK.png (247KB, 704x400px) Image search: [Google]

247KB, 704x400px

>>722418256
22 years old
Fuck this, i dont even want a gf.
Living in a poor country, better to be alone for a live.
I want to become a greatest wizard of all time!

How the fuck do you live on this planet for 24 years and never have sex? Do you just hide alone all day and night? How is this even possible?

>>722418398
Sure kiddo
I bet you've reached enlightenment a loooong time ago

>>722418522
>>722418673
>>722419049
>>722419611
The amount of virginity is extreme with these anon
Math
47 yo
47-15 = 32 years fucking
500 beef curtains / 32 years = 15.6 sloppy ho's a year
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU GO EVEN ONE MONTH WITHOUT BANGING A FUCKING SLUT?

>>722419716
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

File: 1354939541764.jpg (3KB, 114x126px) Image search: [Google]

3KB, 114x126px

>>722419424
It involves understanding that you don't need sex to be happy and focusing on your true passions away from distractions.
I have tried dating before without closing the deal, it a lot of work and it's time and effort better spent on other things, like shitposting on the internet!

File: megane.jpg (6KB, 256x192px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 256x192px

>>722418256
Also 24 and virgin. We are the chosen elite Annon.

>>722419716
do you feel that lying to strangers online improves your situation? Grow up

File: brofistcover.jpg (21KB, 438x438px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 438x438px

>>722419851

>>722419883
Why would I want to lie?

I feel bad for all you beta faggots who can't even communicate with anyone off the internet let alone talk to a human female.
Women want dick just as much as guys. I am here crying because I love you anon. I want you to plant your fuckstick deep inside another person.

>>722419716
>maybe they'll start believing me or ragequit if I just keep lying

>>722420112

POV bro.

I cannot see it from the virgin perspective and you cannot see it from mine.

>>722420110
sure jan

File: 1443724627131.jpg (17KB, 224x225px) Image search: [Google]

17KB, 224x225px

>>722420207
>tfw not virgin
>still know you're full of bullshit and just baiting for (you)

but since you obviously have nothing better to do, here's the (you), Anon. Love you.

>>722418256
Everyone can afford a hooker at least once a month. The young ones (18-23) have really low chances for stds, are better in bed, more beautiful, and better aim to please you than any regular normie girl. don't be virgin and pretend it's by choice, sex is a part of the healthy human experience and you will fuck yourself up 'waiting for the one'

>>722420742
That's the thing. It kinda is a choice since like you said hookers are a thing.

>>722420814
virginity doesn't even exist faggot, it's a figment of your imagination, it's literally just a mental construct for men to satiate their egos. now why would you give up something real (actual sex) for something completely imaginary?

>>722420742
Don't even bother.
They think they are part of some elite club jacking off to porn on the internet instead of making a human connection and living life.

>>722418256
I'm nearly 34. Being a wizard sucks.

Please anon, don't be proud of this. Do something about it. Don't be like me.

>>722421042
That or it is a self-depreciating joke, ever thought of that, faggot?

>>722420378
Sorry if you are offended. The (you) you think I am after is called communication.

thank god some slut threw herself at me when i was 18. i never have to worry about it now it's great.

I was 24 and a virgin but i lost my possible to become wizard status back at Christmas. Im still fucking her, sex is overrated

>>722421552
>/b/
>communication

the fuck are you doing here, lad

File: Magic_the_gathering-card_back.jpg (52KB, 300x416px) Image search: [Google]

52KB, 300x416px

Made it to wizard status.
>Don't like socializing
>Never cared too much about dating
>Go out to dinner one night
>See a girl sitting at a table with a magic card box
>Make a stupid comment
>Played some magic, she had another deck in her purse
>Get married 2 years later
>Now have a daughter on the way
Don't give up hope fellow wizards!

>>722422024
That type of connection can only be achieved using magic.

Wizard powers paying off!

What happens when you turn 40? Do you become a warlock?

>>722422024
true love

>>722422271
no a sage!

File: 4a3.jpg (183KB, 1659x672px) Image search: [Google]

183KB, 1659x672px

>>722422271

File: ac0.jpg (173KB, 1463x777px) Image search: [Google]

173KB, 1463x777px

>>722423122

File: 1473140167056.png (2MB, 1000x640px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1000x640px

>>722418256
21 and pure checking in. I learned early in life that all women are crazy and I'm much happier without their bullshit.

Putting peener in puss only leads to a manipulative bitch taking over your life