Story time >Babysit cousin >blonde hair cute face >she's

ITT : Pedo fantasies that never happened

kys

>>719640911
kys fuckhat

>>719640911
>evil
>posts not-evil story

>>719641390
what is it then?
a saint story
I fantasised my cousin

>>719641507
It's called average on 4chan.

>>719640911
Let's see if this works again.
>Get dubs

>2016
>voted for trump

>>719640911
Not evil, just retarded

>>719640911
bumping

Stepsister sitting on my lap watching some movie. I have her in my arms and she moves her ass up and down on my d. we make out but thats all :'(

>>719641884
lol

>>719640911
Squeezed a hamster to death when I was 4. Stabbed a frog to death with a metal yard flag marking the gas line in our backyard when I was about 11. Smoked crack from 17-19 and did a lot of other fucked up shit during that time.

Against all odds, I turned out to be a productive member of society doing better financially and career wise than most peers my age.

>>71964188

Man, how is that evil?

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> tard story?
> tard story.
> be me, grade 7 at shitty country school
> tard integration program has normies mixed with autismos
> Phys Ed class has a tard in it
> we play intense basketball inside stadium and it's time for drink break
> this tard is loud and gets triggered if you shush him
> literal fury of a thousand suns
> just me and him outside, he tries to push me to get to drink taps first
> I'm too fast for tardy tho, get their first
> he cracks it and kicks me hard in the shin.
> mother dick won't get away with that
> leave taps, as I round corner I lock eyes with him
> shhhhhhh.jpg
> he detonates, engaging tard storm across the school
> four tard wrangles take him down as he kicks and scream
> i shush him again as he's hauled off to tard HQ
> tard can't do shit
> mfw

>2nd year at uni
>Steady girlfriend I was losing interest in
>Ex from high school who's still into me just moved into a flat a short walk away
>Invites me over
>Tell gf I got called into work
>Go there, obviously start fooling around. She seemingly wants me back so she's desperate, lets me fuck her in the arse
>Go home, gf doesn't suspect a thing
>Before bed she wants sex, ends up sucking my cock and then have (normal vaginal) sex
>I didn't shower after butt sex with my ex, so my gf was literally sucking her poo off me
>She suspected nothing

>when I was like 15 I decided I had had enough of WoW and sold my account to some kid over the internet
>few months later get the account back by sending an email to Blizzard that it was hacked

> another tard story
> tard in room by himself for private study
> really just plays mini clip like other tards
> he's getting shitty with a puzzle game, veins on his forehead building and he's sweating like a pig
> I'm staring at him with a few others through creak in door
> hear the faintest of REEEEEEEE's under his breath
> shush him, then quietly close door
> everything is silent, still for about ten seconds
> it all seems to stop, the wind, the noise, dead like it's a vacuum
> suddenly we hear a grunt and then the smashing of glass
> he used tard strength to launch his table through a window
> laptop on ground outside still playing arcade music
> tard runs out and stomps the shit out of it
> some kid tells him to stop it
> disgonbegud.gif
> tardy flips the shits yet again, mauls the kid and throws him into the wall
> he screams about mini clip being defeated
> sounds like "miiiiiimmmm cwiiiip defeeeeeetard"
> hauled off by tard police
> don't see him for a long time

>>719642869
you sound retarded.

> plays nigger handball
> doesn't play hockey

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Clubbed a goose to death after it wandered into my yard and broke the necks of its chicks and kept one for a while before i threw it out when i was bored. Disected a bunch of animals trying to keep them alive. I was young and curious

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Voted Trump

any inappropriate sex stories

>>719643645
This is Aus, everyone thinks hockey is gay here (if they don't they are also gay)

>>719643682
Hello future serial killer

I slapped an ape in Gibraltar

>>719643031
> pulls boss move
> calls it evil

this thread is fucking burnt

/inb4 - what evil shit you done?

> my evil shit puts me in prison for life.

>>719643986
Share it then

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I got me this job one time bussin' tables at a country club. So I could case all the big rich pricks that come in. I pick out this guy, go in one night and do his place. He wakes up and gives me shit. So I killed him. Him and the tasty bitch he was with.

That's the best part! She's fuckin' this prick, see, this golf pro, but she's married to some other guy! Some hotshot banker. He's the one they pinned it on! They got him down Maine somewhere doing time for the crime! Ain't that choice?

>>719644070
I don't believe you.

>>719643832
didn't realise the lowest of the commonwealth were also nigger lovers.

g'day m8 throw a shrimp on the barbie.

Aussie accents are on the list of the worst on the planet.

go fuck an abo

>>719641739
this applies to this
>>719641670

any incest stories

>>719640911
ive watched this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-13WKKNn30

>>719642357
killing small animals at a young age is a sign of psychopathy

>>719640911
1: I associated with a person IRL, once.

2: I declined to use coasters.

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>>719644262
Actually Aus accent is voted sexiest on the globe.
>mfw not even ozzy
>stay salty
And it's called a prawn.

>>719644480
what the fuck

>>719640911

i clicked on all the images of trees

i still don't know if i can go on living like this

>>719644946
I have a disdain towards shop fronts.

>>719644070
Ay.. they get to you yet?

Did anybody get to you yet?

>>719644480

ok what the fucking fuck is that

what the actual fcuking fuck!

Ate Chinese food while watching a video of a Chinese prostitute get raped brutally.

>>719644262
It's called a prawn you uncultured swine. I wouldn't expect someone of the likes of you to know that anyway.

>>719644946
>>719645098

madmen

we are surrounded by madmen

>>719644480
Fuck it was removed what was it?

>>719645477
Words can't describe how horrible.. you don't want to go down this path

>>719645477
reupload guys now i am curious too

>>719645477

seriously that was one of the worst things ive ever seen and i still dont understand it

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>>719643682
So what's your serial killer name going to be

>>719645696
I saw some bitch screaming but went to get my coffee, refreshed for cinematic effect and it got removed.
Was she kill?
Which one of you faggots reported it?

Just bogstandard emotional manipulation and maybe some animal abuse

Called my dad bald

>didn't lose my shit over someone being sent a dick pic on normiebook

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>>719645944
Ass Chekum

>>719646068

hey man can you help me find my tweezers?

>>719645944
>>719646044
>>719645900
Tri dubs

>>719642357
>kills small animals as a child
>literally a psychopath

Yeah, most CEOs are cut from the same cloth. Your success is no surprise.

>>719642357
Crack isn't evil necessarily anon, even tried it once myself
Don't really see the hype but I was off my tits on high purity coke so that probably made an impact
That other shit kind of fucked up tho but more indicative of mental issues than evilness
So what's the other fucked up shit?

>>719644070
friendly reminder that crawling through a tube of shit that small for that amount of time would knock you out and kill you from the fumes before you'd barely made any progress at all

>>719645190
Did it make the chinese food more authentic or nah?

I killed a guy and caused a forest fire to hide the evidence.

>>719643392
Honestly did that kid a favor. Taught him a valuable lesson about how if there's a way out, your business associates will take it and absolutely shaft you every time. He should be glad he learned that on a worthless thing like a video game for neckbeards. He's better off without the account anyway.

>>719643682
What's your company name going to be, future CEO? I hope it serves the community by engaging in illegal dumping, whatever it is.

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>>719646739

>>719645477
It was a video saying "I will delete this video in a few minutes. Pretend it was the most fucked up and confusing thing you've ever seen."

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>>719640911
i stole a severed hand that i found at a car accident..

>Be me
>Didn't give the waiter a tip
>Shit was cash

>>719647336
I saw the original post. Dude needs a prosthesis because of you. Nice going if you aren't lying.

>>719647336
>tfw yoshikage kira is shitposting on /b/

>>719647301
Why would it have broken the terms of service by doing that? It would have just said video removed.

>>719640911
I fucked a 14 year old.

But I was also 15 at the time because she was my high school gf, so I guess it's not that bad.

>tfw you're a generally stand up guy and can't contribute

i broke swallows nest with little birds in it and 2 died immediately, then i threw the one that was still alive for chickens to eat

>>719647622
I saw half of it. A bound and gagged naked woman emitting guttural screams.
Then I got coffee and pressed F5
:(

I fucked a 16 year old when I was 21. She had way more sexual experience than I did and was quite persistent so I gave in. No regrets.

>>719647563
>thinking Kira would leave behind evidence or steal evidence from somewhere else rather than just harvesting his own severed hand

GTFO, Josuke. You are a dumbass and you understand nothing.

>>719647789
I could have done the same with a local slut but decided not to.
She was attracted to me because I am older and somewhat handsome.
I proceeded to shitpost text her until she called me a creep and blocked me from everywhere lal

>>719647766
I looked at the video name and it translated to ' Woman Tortured With Shots On Vagina And Anus'

>>719640911
I came on a 6 year olds feet while she was sleeping

>>719647648
>>tfw you're a generally stand up guy and can't contribute
>statutory rape.

>>719647789
>totally legal in most parts of the world except backwards USA
>totally normal biologically
>evil because muh law said so

>>719648028
>15 and 14 year olds engaging in consentual sexy times
>statutory rape

Fucking kek. If I had received any nudes from her, THAT would've been illegal. The sex wasn't.

>>719648028
Are you retarded? Two underaged peers having consentual sex is not rape in any shape or form.

>>719640911
and your age at the time was?

>>719648041
Exactly. I've told friends about this and some of them think it's wrong or creepy. I give no fucks, she was hot and the puss was tight and delicious.

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>>719640911
I hit my hamster. Guys I'm really sorry about that, I was young and stupid

>>719648476
19

>>719646739
Why?

>>719648535
I mean, there was definite risk involved, but it's not evil.

Creepy is in the eye of the beholder. A 5 year difference is not a big deal though, even if she was that age. I dunno how you managed to put up with her petty, immature bullshit in the meantime, but she had more than enough of her faculties to provide or deny consent. Many states in the US even have 16 as the age of consent.

>>719648024
what's evil about that?
it's just retarded

>>719648558
how did you manage to get your dick in it?

>>719648842
Because otherwise they would've found out he killed the guy

>>719648558
Why would you hit something that small and helpless? Jesus Christ man, you're sick.

>>719648558
Was it self defense? Hamsters can be mean little motherfuckers.

Not an evil story but a story non the less.
>Be me
>Have gf
>Everyone thinks she's attractive
>Disgusted by sight of her
>Lazy eye
>Date her cos everyone says I should
>Try to get to know her
>Normie scum only finds stale memes funny
>Literally just fuck her whenever she comes over
>One day try doggy style
>As I thrust the stench of her filthy ass blows in my face
>Hyperventilating because fucking
>Almost throw up
>Break up with her the next day
>She wants me back
>Says she will do anal
>Ohgodno.jpeg
>Nobody understands why I broke up with her
>Can't say anything because I'm too nice
>Avoid her and get new gf
>Never did doggy style again

lets counts how many seconds till he drinks the drink that bitch gave him?
i say 2 min

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>>719641670
Keep those tears coming lad

>>719649123
>find out gf is human
>WTF.jpg
>initiate breakup.ext

Autismo.

>>719649267
>Takes 3 seconds to clean asshole

>Implying i'm the autismo

Used to kill frogs all the time. Then later I used to spend my allowance on hamsters ND shut, just so I could kill them. My favorite thing to do was to cut the legs off, pour some kerosene on them and set them on fire. Not a lot, but just enough to cook them for a bit, then I'd rinse and repeat.

>>719649350
Oh shit you meant there was shit in her crev. Yeah, fuck that. She was probably American too, amirite?

>>719645477
it was a video of a strangled woman that was shot in the vagina with a gun 2 times

>>719648842
He fucked my then girlfriend.
I pretended I didn't know, invited him for a hike, as both are /out/fags.
Seeing as he ended a part of my life I decided to end his permanently. Stabbed him a few dozen times.
Had a coke bottle full of petrol I passed as apple juice and proceeded to set him and a few nearby trees ablaze. Ended up torching a few acres of land along with him. Cops were certain it was arson/suicide combo.
No more, agent.

>>719649399
You should run a business.

>>719640911
killed loads of people
in warm blood and cold blood
for reasons and to relieve stress
to weed out jerks
to remove resistance
et cetera

for honour and fun only
if someoner makes money they share it with me I don't ask for it
lots of dead by my hand

>>719649585
and I don't hurt animals.

>>719649585
>>719649672
You should run a country

>>719649551
>xhamster.com

>>719649750
I run more than that

I am closing browser now

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>>719643682
>kills goose
>not making a delicious roast goose dinner.

Worst.Serial killer.Ever

>>719649545
>doubt.jpg

>>719649799
Probably wise. Hope your VPN is decent, my guy.

>>719640911
I'll remember the horror movie thing for later. Thanks OP

>>719649545
>autopsy shows he was stabbed a few dozen times before the fire
>what do you think, chief?
>hmm
>arson suicide

>>719648894
I'm her dad.

>>719650049
>autopsy
>on a scorched skeleton
The abdomen has no bones mister

>>719642869
Weird. I call my 4 year old autisimo when he is throwing a fit about something stupid. Thought i made it up

>stay work late everyday
>onetime come to club
>see 12 year old cousin
>wtf
>nvm
>next day rest
>see her fake fb
>say hi
>text and smh
>she:mb you'll come over watch a film,i still dont have money to give for your old flat
>k
>3 times in a row that scheme
>mfw wake up with her up in smoke
>look at her say wtf
>diamonds all the way through the jackpot
>stay together till nobody knows
>still nobody knew.
>sleep with her fried threesome

>>719650158
You mean to tell me they didn't find any evidence of a suicide except that he was there "alone," and suicide is their intuitive leap?

Honestly, if this story is real, it sounds like they were just lazy and knew they'd never catch their perp so they wrote it off to not deal with it any more.

>>719649267
This

>>719645100
What was it?

>>719649777
Motherfucking lol

>>719640911
Kill

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Not really evil, but I told a few friends about it and they seemed to think it wasn't as funny as I thought

>Be 14
>Dating this girl, super religious parents
>She had like 14 brothers and sisters, some half some full siblings
>There's like 6/7 kids living in the house at the time
>One night while babysitting, obvious 14 year old mentality, lets's fuck
>This girl was a virgin, so was I at the time, had some experience with foreplay though
>Figured I'd engage the OG Netflix and chill, put on a film and brought some sweets
>Skip half an hour forward, girl is laying on her back on the floor, I'm going full Labrador and licking the shit out of her cunt
>Engage little sister, about 7 I think
>Doesn't really know what's going on, me obviously spooked, what if she tells her parents?
>Settle the kid into bed, re-engage in the fingerblasting
>Happen to have a family pack of skittles next to me, devise master plan
>One by one, with about half a bag of skittles, start the process of putting them inside her, swilling them around and placing them back in the bag
>Did this for a few minutes, now over half the skittles in the bag are clear, the juice having been absorbed into her vagina
>Exchange with her, if she doesn't tell her parents what happened, I'll give her my "super rare, secret skittles"
>Kids love sweets, obviously agrees, but kids are fucking stupid, starts bragging to siblings that she has super skittles, obviously they fucking all want some
>Tell them they can all have super skittles the next day, invite gf over to my house, spend all day in the factory producing these gems
>All the kids get super skittles, parents never find out, continued to see gf at the time for a few months, tried everything sexually a 14 year old would want to
>Don't think about it for years

Mfw I realised that I basically got out of a lecture from her super religious parents, all by giving each of her younger siblings skittles that'd been soaked in their sisters vag

>>719649545
What does killing a guy feel like?

>>719650452
Not the forest fire guy but probably. Perfect crimes happen every day, some sloppier than others.

>>719649777
>and trips to boot

Honestly probably the best thing I'll read on 4chan all day.

>>719640911
13?
too old
kys

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>>719650158
If you are going to make shit like this up then at least fucking do a little research.

The fire would have scorched the body sure, but if you knew anything you would know that the human body doesnt just burn like dry leaves or fucking trees.

The body would have been scorched, then the fire would move on to the the nearby brush leaving the body behind because flesh is pretty flame retardant.

>inb4 what about cremation.

Yes, in a closed container with a few thousand degrees to turn it into ashes over the course of several hours.

Not free range wind blown brush fire flames.

feg.

>>719650784
Not him but can answer.
Exciting until the adrenaline fades. Then you slowly forget except during sleep.

>>719640911
>>Babysit cousin
>>she's 13

>babysitting a 13yo

fake af tbh fam

>>719644070
Elmo knows where you live!

>>719649750
Adolf is it you?

>>719651005
I posted that not the supposed firestarter. Dunno if it's true or not was just saying it's possible.

What if the guy had high body fat percentage and/or synthetic clothes?

There is no "sex in the missionary position for the soul purpose of pro creation." post, i am genuinely impressed. Good job for not being a massive faggot.

Smoked weed,

Once, w/out reason throw books and killed a bird,
my Lucifer,
am I so psychopat ;-;

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>>719651547
more often then not, the flames would have burned the kerosene off then moved on before the fire was able to produce enough heat on his body to actually catch.


Our bodies are 70% water.
And thats just common sense speaking, todays kids are so stupid they forget shit like this.

i stole my friends GF
hooked up with another friends GF
felt up 2 other friends GFs infront of them
made another friends GF fall in love with me just because i liked the attention
friends to beta to do or say shit too me

am i a shitty friend or are they just shitty GFs

>>719640911
bump for actual evil thread is fake af

>>719653363
oh and i fucked my half sister but thats a whole other story, not very interesting tbh

This thread is retarded

>>719646346
>>719646971

lol post-teenage angst gets the best of underperforming adults doesn't it

>when we were like nineteen a friend of mine nicknamed Crazy Monkey owned a car
>Friday and Saturdaynight we went out in that car
>somehow we began to punch random people in the street, like we saw somebody waiting for the bus we got close to the sidewalk and hit him, first just with the fist or open hand, after a while with a kind of short truncheon we got
>short holidays we all leaving going to the country
>while on the route we saw somebody on a bicycle in our same direction
>get closer crazy monkey, we'll give that fucker a hit
>he did so, and when we were just to the side of the bicycle another friend of mine gave the fucker the truncheon, fucker went off route and fell in a ditch
>then by the mirrors we saw it was a young woman carrying a little baby on a baby carry bag
>after many years that image still haunts me

>>719653363
Greentext feeling up other friends gfs
Actually, greentext everything

>>719643645
>HOCKEY

hooked up with another friends GF
>was at a party be 17
>was dating half sister at the time
>she lived a state away
>got really drunk and started talking to my friends GF
>she be 13
>start talking about how i have a GF that lives outta town
>start talking about how i wouldnt cheat, just general drunk convo
>she kisses me
>go back into shed where everyone else is
>continue making out
>friend is literally sitting 2 feet from us with his back turned
>confronts us saying whats going on between you two
>tell him to fuck off i have already been hooking up with his GF all night
>he walks off, party gets divided down middle, wars ensue
>me too drunk to know or care whats going on around me
>hook up with her a few more times and go home

first greentext
continue with others?

>>719643766
jesus christ that picture is an atrocity