g'morning b, hope u slept well. tell me why you will not

>>717937567

Because i hope that in the not very distant future they find a way to be immortal. I don't want to die. Never.

Because it's Friday.

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>>717937567
Because I am going to kill you.

>>717937567
Live forever or die trying.

>>717937567
Because I can't unsee that there are 5 arms in that gif

Because I have a whole lot of alcohol left to drink

>>717937739
The left one is his left leg, you fool.

>>717937739
one is a leg.

>>717937567
Got an exam to turn in.

>>717937567
Because when I am dead I won't get to look at asses like that any more.

Because the woman i love, loves me but doesn't want to be with me (bitter sweet)

cause every day is an extra day when you're already dead

>>717937567
Why do you always make this thread? Why are you such a loser?

>>717937567
Hmm
Well
My son is just about a year old and he's sleeping peacefully next to me as I shitpost and drink coffee and watch the snow fall.

Pretty good morning tbh

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>>717938143

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>>717937567
>I'm married to a beautiful woman who's my best friend
>we have an active and satisfying sex life
>I have three wonderful kids I adore
>I live in a comfortable home, drive a nice car and own both
>I have a well paying job I find fulfilling
>I work with nice people who respect me
>I have a fairly affluent lifestyle but live well within my means
>I'm on pace to retire in my 50s
>I'm in good overall health
>My credit rating is near 800
>my favorite team ran the table to make the playoff
>My wife and I will be doing what's in your gif tomorrow

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>>717937567
>tell me why you will not KILL YOURSELF today.
Because everyday I get asked this question.

>>717937567
wife gave me a wink this morning over coffee. pretty sure it's on like donkey kong tonight.

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36, successful, internationally respected in my quiet little field, nice toys, nice 24yo GF, and a brand new range toy on the way next week (USPc .45ACP)

>>717938310
Packer backer detected

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Every night. Every night I pray that you'll be here with this same thread, asking the same question and providing yet another animation for us to marvel at.

Every night I look upon the thread with awe and wonderment, with sparkles in my adoring eyes.

You keep me alive, Sublimanon. You keep me here.

>>717937567
I have to take a state exam today which I'm hoping is the game-changer in an otherwise uneventful, depressing life that seems to be heading further and further downhill with age.

>>717938484
>brand new range toy on the way next week
So next week you will kill yourself?

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>>717938554
>>717938345
>>717938143
cool. hi guys.
>>717937901
asses are nice.
>>717937899
nice dubs. hope you aced it.

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>>717938492

I decided that I if I have to suffer to make those around me happy then so be it. I wake up every damn day knowing it will only get worse with every waking moment but I can't quit on myself or those who love me. I may be suicidal but I'm not weak. Somehow I must survive.

>>717938923
Not at all. I'm a fan too. Montgomery really impressed this year.
Allison looks to be great as well.
fucking injuries though

>>717937567
because one day i'll get her

>>717938693
who's she?

>>717938598
no i kill the porngrannies. All the porngrannies

>>717939190
Its shields injury that's hurt the most

>>717937567
Because maybe some day, it'll get better.

>>717937567
I just need to live long enough for trump to fuck up as president so I can shitpost on /pol/ the way /pol/ has been shitposting on the rest of the board.
So just a couple more months, then sweet release.

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>>717939907
america is shit now.

>>717940052
we're doing okay, but we need to stay activated and aware of what the government is doing.

we have safeguards to our republic, and we as citizen need to call out the government when they do crazy shit.

>>717937567
Because it seems that a girl likes me. A girl I've been into for a very long time.

Because If I die than my tomadachi dies, and it's the only thing I love.

>>717938310
>credit score near 800
>says he owns house
>says he owns car
>sounds like a debt loving American to me

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Have a date with a spanish girl tonight. 110 pounds 5ft tall and has a 2 year old. Don't know if i should get involved with a girl with kids though, any advice, never been in this situation before.

>>717941140
Eh maybe one day you'll love the kid like your own. My oldest son isn't even my blood but I love him just the same and he loves me (I hope)

>>717937567
Because youre still alive and im going to outlive you, scumbag

>>717937567
Because my boss is gone skiing all week and I get to smoke weed.

>>717941140
I say go for it. Most of my relationships have been with women who have kids. Unless they're expressly looking to set you up as a surrogate daddy you should be fine. Just be aware that their existence alone means you'll have to form a relationship and any related activities around them, the severity depending on how old they are.

>>717939907
Go to tumblr and masturbate to cuckold porn, gaylord.

>>717941269
Benny?

>>717941123
Mountains of debt and a high credit score are incompatible

>>717941418
Shes taking her to the zoo this morning and asked me if i wanted to go. i said im busy and that we can hang out later instead. bitch tried to lure me in

>nice job, computer scientist, 35h a week, $40k
>nice gf
>few, but very good friends
>healthy
>living in peaceful and wealthy country
>able to travel a lot (no kids yet, yay)

why should I?

>>717941464
My name is Gabriel, sorry man. My son is 18 by the way, I'm old as hell

>>717941527
I owe 18k on my car, 3500$ in credit card debt and i have a 750 score, explain?

I make all of my payments on time with no missed payments and i have a credit line of 25k. You are wrong, sir.

>>717941527
You have to spend money you don't have to owe money and pay that back to get a credit score. So you do have to like debt to have a good credit score

>>717941701
why do you americans (I assume) have credit card debt at all? I mean, you pay interest, don't you?
confused germanfag here

>>717941701
This guy gets it

>>717941701
You're definition of massive debt is different from mine

>>717941781
using a credit card for your purchases and pay them off right away is the best way to increase your score. Maintaining a large balance drops your score.

>>717941843
My idea of massive debt is anything over $0.01

>>717941833
You only pay interest if you don't pay it off right away

>>717941833
I didnt have 30k to pay for my car so a creditor lends you the money because they trust you're not gonna nig him. and yes im american

>>717941841
:)

>>717941843
well 23kish is alot to me, i have over 15k saved up but you obviously don't understand how to get credit. You have to prove that you can pay it back. Even if its small things like getting gas and groceries you should get a credit card and just pay the money back from your debit card at the end of the month. I can't tell if you're confused or na. I know what massive debt is, my sister owes 300k and she is just now finishing her clinicals for med school.

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>>717941140
fuck her hard anon. good luck.
>>717941278
i hope so.

>>717941936
The credit bureaus have a much different opinion

>>717941701
750 isn't that strong? So..

>>717941833
Americans are really fucking stupid and buy shit they can't afford. They make 50,000 dollars a year and wanna live like they are making 100,000 dollars a year

>>717941603
She's trying to spend time with you, man. The fact that she involved her kid is a good sign - she's being straight-up with you from the beginning. I'm not saying to let your guard down, mind you. Always be on the lookout for red flags and such. For now though I say go with it.

>>717941140
That's up to you. If you liked her enough to go on a date with her, then give her a shot. Really couldn't hurt.

>>717942007
Anything over 720 is quite good actually

>>717941665
Just a hunch. I'm old as hell, too.

>>717941833
also i bought this german girl a pizza yesterday, i didnt charge me for delivery fee and she didnt tip, wdf?? also salami is NOT pepperoni. bitch.

>>717942007
750 is very good for a 26 year old alpha male. whats your score? bitch

>>717942003
I have a shit credit score, but I have all the nice things in life all payed off with cash up front. I save up and buy everything took me 15 years to buy my house and 3 years to buy my car, all worth it.

>>717941963
oh ok, I see

>>717942042
that's not exclusive to americans, as I can speak for Germany... we have debt for cars and houses, but having credit card debt like around 3500$ for months or even years is unusual

>>717942042
Not just Americans, man. Lots of First-Worlders. Westerners in particular, in my experience

>>717942245
I have 3500$ credit card debt as of 3 weeks ago. Again i have around 15k saved up in cash but its not smart to just pay off that 3500$. you want to pay it off over time on larger increments to increase credit and show that you can pay off debt. I went on a trip to germany ironically and thats why i owe 3500$.

>>717942116
not all delivery services have delivery fees but rather work with minimum purchase
I do tip the pizza guy, but less than you would do, I assume. Around 10%-15% of total, also in restaurants btw
some people never tip and they usually get away with it without much hassle

>>717942302
I was raised in Vietnam, I'm white but grew up like a gook. It taught me to be careful what you buy and use it to its fullest. Might as well of been born in the 1930s America

>>717942412
If my bill is 10 ill tip 5, if my bill is 15 ill tip 5, if its over 20 ill tip 7 usually, im american but ive work at delivery and restaurant settings so i know how much id appreciate just a few dollars more. Plus the person you tip will remember that and they will hook you up after that ;)

>>717942393
>£4k credit card debt, £4k bank loan, £1500 'miscellaneous credit' and £1k overdraft
>earn £1600/month
>not even 30 yet

get on my level faggot

>>717942453
Hey, that's got to be a pretty unique worldview. Where do you live now?

>>717942543
okay, you win. lol

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>>717937567
It's because I'm too much of a bitch.
I'm tired of living, but I'm too scared to kill myself

>>717942543
forgot to add
>about to lose job after 3 months sick leave
>probably end up back on minimum wage if i can even find permanent work again

>>717942393
Nope best thing you could do is pay it all off at once

>>717937567
I wanna. I really do. Just don't wanna do it to my wife.

>>717942551
I live in America now, it's not everyday you meet a white guy with an Asian accent

>>717942785
I know a guy who shot himself in his garage and the bullet went through his skull sparing him going through the ceiling and killing his wife on their bed.

>>717942531
US employees rely on tips much much more than german employees, that's why you tip so much (from our perspective)
anything over 30% is very very generous in germany

>>717942989
Sometimes I tip people 115% and every time they get pissy and say sir it's 15% not 115% then I take it back and tell them I did it on purpose

>>717942813
I'll bet, holy shit. What reactions do you get from Asians vs Whites?

Anal.

>>717943144
Asians usually give me dirty looks because they think I'm making fun of them, since my accent has faded over time. And everyone else just think it's funny

>>717943268
need pic of you pls

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>>717937567
Because i am not a coward and i don't run away from my problems.

>>717943373
I'm just your typical 6 foot 2 inch black hair brown eyed 200lb American

>>717937567
Its my birthday... :s

>>717943373
I do have a dual citizenship also which is neat, but I've been in America since I was 17

>>717943511
It is my birthday also, I just turned 18 15 minutes ago and am now legally able to browse 4chan. Not worth the wait tbh I think I'm going to start smoking due to the disappointment.

>>717937567
Dont know, feel as if I am destined to do something.

>>717943576
Go back to Gookland, snag a hot Azn wife. If you haven't already, that is.

>>717937567
Hmmm.... Well, I have a short, fat, ugly gf. But she lets me pissed on her and fuck her ass. Buell, she even sucks my dick after it's been in her ass. Guess I'll stick around and think up some more depraved stuff to do to her tonight...

>>717944186
I snagged a hot California girl and settled in colorado. We've been married for 15 years now. I grew up in the part of Vietnam that was equivilant to Africa all the girls had rotten teeth and smelled like shit

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Because

>>717944125
That's what Eric and Dylan said to

>>717944186
I am turned off at the sight of an Asian girl tbh

Because my life is awesome

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>>717945041
congrats.

>>717944805
Fair enough. You've got your hottie anyway. I may have yellow fever but even I recognize that a hot white beats a hot asian any day.

>>717938484
you will love your new range tool. uspc 45 in ss was the best shooting handgun i ever owned.

>>717945498
Especially when they have blonde hair and blue eyes. She's short and hot, even at 35. but also my best friend. The only person that didn't make fun of me when I moved to America

>>717945828
Nice man, very nice. You've done well.

>>717945971
Not bad at all, do you have kids also?

>>717946084
Nah, chronically single and too old for that shit now. Unless I can snag a young filly to breed which doesn't seem likely unless I go foreign and the thought of having mixed-race kids kind of freaks me out, tbh.

>>717937567
>>717938693
Sauce plox

>>717937567
Last day/night in our old apartment before my wife and I move to a new city with much better climate and job opportunities. Feels like everything is coming together after 40 years of shit.

>>717946642
I have two kids 8 years and 6 months... I love them but holy shit are they annoying. I'm 35, young enough to deal with them but holy shit are they annoying

>>717946642
Get a mexican girl, just transfer your genes by any means necessary.

>>717947059
I'll bet. I don't have any of my own but lots of my friends do and I've lived with many more people who have them, at all stages from tots to teens. So I can imagine.

>>717947184
I suppose I could pick up a Slav, too. I'm of Slavic descent. Don't know why I never though of it before.

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>>717944358
>Hmmm.... Well, I have a short, fat, ugly gf. But she lets me pissed on her and fuck her ass. Buell, she even sucks my dick after it's been in her ass. Guess I'll stick around and think up some more depraved stuff to do to her tonight...
um ok.

>>717947706
They just want the American citizenship and then they divorce you and take half your shit

Cause i have a lovely girlfriend that adores me and i would hate to make her sad?

>>717937567
>tell me why you will not KILL YOURSELF today

because i'm worth a lot of money and i'm white. also i get all the pussy i want since i'm one of the few guys that has a wife that actually wants to fuck me. i can smell her pussy on my breath right now. i have a fine young GSD and i don't have to work for a living. that's probably kind of bad, since i'm a raging alcoholic and that means i'm constantly drunk. who cares? it's probably just a slow form of suicide, so that brings us back to your OP. but since OP is always a fag, there you go.

>>717948423
I'm not American, and I'd know she was happy in whatever shit country she was from because I'd insist on us living there for a few years at least.

>>717942302
yeah, because we can actually get loans ya dingus

>>717949017
Well, yeah. Not disputing that. I've had my fair share of unnecessary debt.

>>717937567
This week the wife of a friend left him for me.
They would feel both really trolled if I would do this now.

>>717937567
i have a shift at Macdonalds cant miss that..

>>717937567
>Sauce
sauce please?

i won't kill myself because i may found a way to earn a lot of money

>>717949270
I just couldn't do that to a bro, no matter how much I thought I loved the cumdumpster

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because of these bruh

Because I have a beautiful girl that loves me Wholeheartedly, and we have an amazing sex life together

>>717937642
you have some growing up to do.

>>717937567
Because all the methods i consider either hurt oo much or require too much prep/buying shit.

Guns aren't readily available here. So there you go gunfags. it actually does prevent suicide by having guns not easily sourced

>>717953046
Jump off a bridge you pussy, they're free

>>717953104
Involves going out finding a high enough bridge with a concrete base.

I'm not overly sad, i just cant be fucked anymore. So i cant even be fucked killing myself. I just exist.

After a really fun holiday that i worked like a dog for, i realised that life is basically 95% doing shit you hate, so you can spend 5% of it doing stuff you enjoy. Even thats pointless, its just a feeling of enjoyment, it means nothing.

Dont you guys ever think that?

I mean, you can escape it by getting a high paying job to reduce the 95% to like 80%, but its still not worth.

Life is a hassle. One day I'll be motivated enough to end it. For now i just exist. Because i'm not even suffering, just cant be fucked. Existing is less effort than dying.

Although, if i ever do just randomly go over a bridge and realise it's high enough to have 0 chance of survival, maybe i'll consider it. Thanks for the suggestion.

>>717953592
>Dont you guys ever think that?
That life is pointless, because nothing matters and we all are going to die anyways, so everything we do while we are alive is worthless?

Yes, usually once a day, but I still keep going for the hell of it. I could easily end my life, because I have the tools to do so, but I just do not bother.

>>717937688
I laughed at this post way more than I should have.

I've gotta clean my room up and test out my new fleshlight

>>717937567
it's not my time yet.

>>717954063
>test out my new fleshlight
kek'ed