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Waifu claiming thread. Previous:>>717303915 Rules: >Claim

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 170
Thread images: 142

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Waifu claiming thread.


>Claim your Waifu/Husbando
>No Claiming Waifus/Husbandos that have already been claimed
>Only one claim per anon
>No stealing (unless trips or more)
>No oversexualised content
>No RP/ERP of any kind (maybe some on occasion)
>Discussion is welcomed
>Insults must be original
>If you're posting images you're not lurking
>3D is almost always trash
>Joining means a reserved place in hell
>Most importantly, have fun!

Rory-sama claimed
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I'm HomoMad at 2Mb limit.
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Still here
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Morning all
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Morning, sleep well?
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Morning! How's it going?
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>Not superior Helmad
help i want to cuddle the Reiposter
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I slept pretty good for a couple hours. Usually I get more sleep but I'm on my way back to Texas today.


Doing good, I've got high hopes for 2017!
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>replying to the Mavisposter
Into the rape dungeon you go.
>newfag messing up the meme
Neck yourself
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Ah, were you in Texas visiting family?
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I'm claiming both of them
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Rude. I'm pretty cool everyone wants to be friends with Mavis.

Going back home actually
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There is only one right answer
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Ayyy Mavis, what's good mang?
Desperation is the price of admission.
I'm really not that good.
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That's haram onii-fam. You'll have to stick with the forced Kuudere or the cunt.
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whats so bad about harems?
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Why's that?

Did I fuck up?
not really desperate but still
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Yep, now your anus is mine, friendo.
Say goodbye to your anal virginity
What do you see in me then?
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So what are you plotting for 2017? We know you are up to some shady shit.
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I feel like that boat has sailed a little...
you are kind, and lonley, must embrace
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You must want to embrace many anons then
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Meh/10 on those titts. Better eat your wheaties.
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Yours are not much better
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Here is some hairy vagina
You especially.
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Here is a semi-lewd Koume
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Night Tomoko
Terrible decision
Well yeah you are right, if Rei doesn't feel comfortable i sjpi;d stp[
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Whatever you say Russian spy
It's not.

I'm comfortable.
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What's this about Russian spies?
In inclined to disagree
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Good Morning everyone!
Because I don't like me
What if I like you?
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Have alot of her anyway, so claiming.
I'd say you're misinformed
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Yeah. no one actually likes you.
A kindred spirit you are
The opposite is true, I think you're misinformed.
But I guess I can't stop you.
gonna post random funny such of her until I fall out
why would you not like yourself?

Glad to read that i don't want to be a pushover
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Wouldn't I know me better than anyone though
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Better question would be, why would I like myself
hereis a photo for you
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I have awoken
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You're not, I'm just awkward.

You'd think that. But that doesn't seem to be the case
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my chest feels empty

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don't you have a tree to crash into?
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So does mine.
cute tbh i want to tuck you in a bed and stay warm the both of us holding hands
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it's how i do bb

how late you gotta work?
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Till 11. Which means I'm staying up all day. Thanks Vince, fucking cunt.
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Just don't, like, crash the miata.
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rekt, does he have no one else he could assigned

i have taught you well
That sounds fine to me.
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Bring back the Big Montana, dammit!

Apparently not. I seriously should've expected the cunt to call out on New Years. How the fuck he's able to call out SO FUCKING MUCH AND THEY DON'T FIRE HIM is fucking beyond me.
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To all our readers in the U.S.: Time is running out in 2017 to help Wikipedia. Do you want Wikipedia to be there when you need it? Today, tomorrow, and for years to come? If you do, our community needs your support. When I made Wikipedia a non-profit, people warned me I’d regret it. Over a decade later, it’s the only top ten site run by a non-profit and a community of passionate volunteers. Has it crossed my mind how much money we could have made if it had ads? Sure. But I believe people wouldn’t want to build it and we wouldn't be able to trust it. To protect our independence, we'll never run ads. We're sustained by donations averaging about $15. Now is the time we ask. If everyone reading this right now gave $3, our fundraiser would be done within an hour. That's right, the price of a cup of coffee is all we need. Please help us keep Wikipedia online and growing. Thank you — Jimmy Wales, Wikipedia Founder
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At least you don't have heart disease.
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I need more advice on how to bully.

I thought you were actually talking about driving a miata at some point?
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Is it TheMexican27?

Yeah, TheMexican27!

Who is TheMexican27?

Some say TheMexican27 is the first Farmville player ever, born from Latin America.

I heard TheMexican27 can cut grass better by hand than a lawnmower.

I heard TheMexican27 can cut an entire field of grass with a single blow.

But the worst part is, just when you think you're safe, just when you think you might escape; WHAM!!! Just like that!

YOUR FRONT YARD HAS BEEN TRIMMED What!? No no no no no no no no!

BUSHES UNDER ATTACK That's impossible!

YOUR LAWNMOWER HAS BEEN CAPTURED TheMexican27 has captured my lawnmower!

Mine too!

Aw, you guys, I'm sure it's not that bad!

You have no idea what just happened.

I might have some idea...

"Welcome back, TheMexican27"

FarmVille: Play for free on the app store.
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some companies give way too much leeway to employees like that, people who do that just know how to play the system, pisses me off

tell him his company doesn't know how to fully commit and then they gave up on their hopes and dreams
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I think I've done that.
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ask if his dorritos have the edges worn off them
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What the mint-chocolate chip did you just chocolate say about me, you little strawberry? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the vanilla out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my rocky road words. You think you can get away with saying that caramel to me over the Internet? Think again, fudge. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re banana dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable black cherry off the face of the continent, you little birthday cake. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your cookie dough tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn cheesecake. I will crackle caramel all over you and you will drown in it. Make like a banana and split, kiddo.

More than likely it's on the job politics, being a favorite of his boss, or the superiors can also be the type that look the other way because they don't like dealing with that shit like they should.
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I wish I did, then I'd have a real reason to feel like shit. Rather than feel like shit for no reason.
>When god won't strike you down
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Oh, right. That's later today!

It's just aggravating to all hell. Like, what if I fucking had plans for today? Normally I don't, BUT I ACTUALLY FUCKING DID THIS TIME!

The manager dislikes him, and the superiors are just lazy dick heads. Like, I wouldn't be so mad if it was once in a while, but it's a 100% that he "calls out" 1 to 2 times a month. And it's ALWAYS for some concert, holiday, got too drunk the night before, or some other retarded reason. The one time he DID call out cause he was sick, I literally didn't even believe it until he showed up sneezing and shit the next day.
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Don't crash your miata or that one!
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what plans you had later? driving a mazda with the correct engine?
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when i was 17 i almost died from septic shock. i used to play with wads of toilet paper in my ass after shitting and it felt good, but pieces built up inside over time. when they were flushing me out at the hospital i saw chunks floating in the clear tubes and got a really hard boner plus the water pressure almost made me cum. that's when i knew i loved hyperscat.
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They gotta be able to find someone better. Someone who's reliable and pulls their weight.

Those are the sort of people who will take full advantage if they aren't dealt with quickly. Sounds like he's been cancer for a long time now. I used to work with some people like that when I started out- finding ways to weasel out of weekend shifts, large events, and of course, late night inspections at bars and clubs.
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I feel like I should be taking your side in this but it's too fun.
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Yes, you. The one screaming, "There's no multiplayer!" and "Sean Murray lied to us!" and other slurs I dare not mention. Tread lightly.

You are one. We are hundreds, thousands. Millions. You aren't just IN the minority; you ARE the minority.

I don't feel awkward or anxious playing No Man's Sky around others, and your words don't affect me. Many others, however, are coming out of their shells for the first time in their lives. This is the first time many are enjoying the beautiful world that has been procedurally generated for us - and it IS beautiful. Incredibly so. DON'T ruin this for them. We No Man's Sky fans may have our differences, but we will not hesitate to come to the aid of our fellow explorers, especially against someone who so virulently slurs that which has brought us all together.

Don't take this the wrong way. I don't hate you. I don't fear you. I pity you.

I'm sorry that you feel this way towards us. I'm sorry that No Man's Sky is such a bane to your existence. And I'm sorry that you are missing out on such a wonderful experience. Mostly, though, I'm sorry that you feel the need to go around and publicly chastise and berate others. I'm sorry that, to ensure your own validity, you need to make others feel invalid. I'm sorry that your self-worth is so infinitesimally miniscule that you have to make others feel less-than-human, at least in your own denatured mind, just to feel whole. I am truly sorry that day-in and day-out you have to put up with your worthless, meaningless, Shakespearean tragedy of a life.

I ask you politely to cease your unnecessary cries for attention, and instead invite you to join our ranks. Uninstall Call of Duty, start up No Man's Sky, and breathe in the splendour and the amazement of your first planet, and then, maybe, just maybe, you'll see what you've been so hopelessly searching for this whole time.
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It really screws up your cardio and what not. I'm slim and all, can run a bunch without my legs giving out but my heart just dies out. My breathing becomes irrational making less oxygen go to my legs and then my legs die out.
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you gotta be careful with those pistons man, handling something so reliable is a lot of responsibility
Opposite when it comes to running, my cardio is bad, but my legs shit out on me, they can't take running, my heart rate is so slow while im running I know I could go faster if my legs didn't go numb, but they do, then I can't run because im unable to control my legs past standing.
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images ree
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I sexually Identify as a LA̕͏͜M̴̨̀͠B̨͘͟͝͝O̴͟͢͠RGHINI. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of DRIVing UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. People say to me that a person being a LAMBORGHINI is Impossible and I’m MATERIALISTIC but I don’t care, I’m this NEW LAMBORG̡͏͏H̡͢Į͡NI HERE. I’m having a plastic surgeon install , 7 NEW bookshelves and 2000 new books on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “NEW LAMBORGHINI HERE” and respect my right to DRIVE UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. If you can’t accept me you’re a LAMBOphobe and need to check your ̡GNA͏WL͞I̛DGE. Thank you, and I'll see you on my website.
If only. The company itself is shady as fuck. If I could get a job at some oil shop or something simple, I'd be happy, even if I had to do actual work, rather than being here. But I guess shit coworkers are something you just can't escape seeing as this is job 3 with them.

We'll see who's laughing when I give you a toaster with it's own OS.

I will jam apex seals down your throat!
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are they gunna be all worn down?
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Hey I'd play Doom on that toaster.
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Just do a lot of squats, hold squat positions work out the knees. Then lunges. Progressively work leg muscle and you'll be good.

>tried using oxygen mask while running
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Wrong toaster!
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It's as good an excuse as any to try and find something that'll steer you towards mechanic work if the pay is decent. Plus you'd get normal working hours. Shitty coworkers are everywhere unfortunately, but there should be more than enough decent/good ones to make up for them in a good workplace.

I figured a big city ought to have some entry-level work in garages or oil/lube places, no?
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The hell kind of toaster did you think I meant?
gardi <3
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It's more of a bone thing.
Pigeon toed, so my running is really bad form, even when I try to correct it, it's like running on my shins. My leg muscles are strong, I can squat and lunge all day, I can run perfectly fine on a treadmill, but running on real ground feeling real impact? Nope.
pacifica west
Oh, I can't really help with that. One of my friends is penguin toed or something, and her walking is a bit off. She walks slowly to hide it.
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Happy New Years. I guess. Unless you are Chinese.
Where they turn in, yeah, pigeon toed.
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Pay would probably be about the same, and normal hours are kinda meh. I rather enjoy my hours now, since Anya is up at these hours. But... meh, you can see I've got a little dilemma with it.

You'd figure so, till you realize how insanely close to Mexico I live.

One cheeki cunt reee!

Fine, a microwave!
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it's how i do
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I could play Doom on a microwave!
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I still celebrate New Year's. I'm just 300% more hyped on Chinese New Year

And with your shins... Gently kick a wall or have some thick pipe and roll it along your shin. Not too hard, but enough to strengthen it
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Hello everyone! Happy New Year!
>undercut by cheap labor
Shit, forgot about that. I guess it's alright as long as they're not bouncing paychecks and cutting your hours? Gotta roll with the punches, though you get sick of it after long enough.

Time for me to get going, see you around.
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u guys will never have sex with your waifu
With advances in artificial intelligence, virtual reality and robotics, there may be hope.
File: Anya (896).jpg (971KB, 1142x811px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
Anya (896).jpg
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You can play Doom on anything.
good i hope so. if not then you are dead kidda
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sideways is love
That's a pretty bold claim. And how can you be so sure of my impending demise?
cuz i will strangle you for giving me hope for waifus
and then finding out that they will not exist
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Not if I kill you first! HARAGGHHHHH!


*sounds of body being drug*
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triangles, triangles, triangles, TRIANGLES, TRIANGLES, TRIANGLES
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Anya (758).jpg
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Unfortunately, yes.
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Claimed <3 even made this pic

What about on the car? :^)
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Anya (783).jpg
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I'll do more than play Doom on the car.
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oh, you are a member of the church of latter day TAINTS?

I thought that was on a volunteer basis
I fell asleep
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Anya (251).png
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Well yeah, I'll do you on the car.
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How lewd.gif
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do you get together to fist bump? (and touch butts)

File: Anya (338).jpg (723KB, 1754x1240px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
Anya (338).jpg
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Yes! Did you not want me to?
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that's gay yo
*teleports behind you* nothing personnel kid,
*shoots lasers out of sword* but you messing with the wrong anon here
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only the gays touch butts
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Anya (454).jpg
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I was obviously leading into it!
Never fell in such a deep love with an anime character like this one before.
Hey situation was too sad for me to feel too much
File: Huh 2.gif (459KB, 500x385px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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accidental gay is still gay
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Anya (473).jpg
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Well when you put it that way...
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i am the King of the Fags, i declare what is and isn't gay and i declare that accidental gay is still gay
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And you're gay for me all the way
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Anya (748).jpg
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Kitty 2.png
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but yes
*body starts levitating as you walk away*

*eyes begin glowing red with spheres of dark energy resonating from palms*

I see you have a death wish. Well I will be happy to accommodate you
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Thread posts: 170
Thread images: 142

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