What the fuck is wrong this god damn cat? >out of nowhere

>>715366677
The cat is haunting you. If you kill it it will continue haunting you, only scarier. You should probably kill your self

>>715366677
fucking shoot it

>>715366677
shoot yourself then shoot it

>>715366677
nice Full House.

Feed the cat, also maybe a bowl of milk, and it will go away

Take it in and give it a good life you piece of shit. Or if you dont want it re home it to someone who has a soul. If nobody takes it then shoot it. And live with the regret of killing somthing that loved you

>>715366677
Take him into your home keep him or cat and dog shelter. But he obviously likes you shame you want him to go away. Kneel down on his level not to close and make a little ticking noise and rub your fingers hell come over

Grab a bowl you're okay with never seeing again (or buy a cheap plastic bowl), fill it with water and drop it off somewhere away from your door.

>>715367197
>>715367204
Pretty much these

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>>715367144
IT JUST WANTS MORE

>>715366677
Call animal control and they will come remove it.

>>715367354
If you were in the streets dude hungry and wanting somewhere warm. He wants to be with you anon ;(

>>715367354

>feeding an animal
>expecting it to leave the source of the food

Are you retarded?

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get some acetaminophen, crush it up into powder, mix it with tuna feed it to the cat. problem solved

>>715367354
OP. You took advice from the wrong guy. Don't you know the saying?

adopt him.
he will give you luck and happiness

>>715367815
Seriously fucking kill yourself.

if dubs you take the kitty in

>>715367860
roll for this

>>715366677
>>715367144
>>715367233
>>715368027
op take kitten in house and love him forever

>>715366677
This is something I know how to deal with anon... put him in your bathroom for 3-5 days with water, a litterbox, and food. Make sure it doesn't get out. Now, after 3-5 days that cat will think this is its home. You now have a pet cat.

>>715367204
>>715368027
its not working

its just gurgling at me now what the fuck cats do that?

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>>715366677

get an air rifle or something mate.

Get rid of it. They kill like 30 mammals a day, you would be doing your local fauna a favor.

It's a feral cat. That means its to wild, and will never be a good house pet. A cat will routinely patrol a same exact route every day. They do that until they die. On it's daily route one of its ways to find food is by seeing who wants to feed it, and returning.

>>715366677
Get some proper cat food, feed cat daily. Make friends with cat and eventually invite her inside the house. Provide a warm blanket next to food and water. Don't try to shape her into a housecat, let her outside when she wants. She's prolly not always been feral since she's not shy of humans, but idk if you can get her to use a litter box.

>>715368230
It's begging for catnip you dumb cunt
There's catnip growing somewhere around your house
Find it and relocate it to your annoying neighbors yard
??????
Profit

>>715368230
He's scared bro. He's wild any person that's probably seen him has probably scared him off or tried attacking him. My grandma own a stray cat and I had one he was terrified took some time he would hiss and sit at the back door except he was sick. He was dying and he would let you hardly touch him. But on his last day he came in the house and gave everyone love. :(

>>715368558
This. Think about it op you could scare him off now probably bad things will happen to him. Or have a good mate at your side

Go to your local hardware store and buy some Fly Bait. Put it in a bowl of Cola and set it outside. The cat will be offended and leave.

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it likes cheese for some reason

Trips and animal control takes it away I don't want it

>>715369019
Sage

>>715366677
It's trying to adopt you. From the way it's behaving, it was somebody's cat who got dumped.

If you have some canned tuna, put a bowl of it on the deck and tap your finger on the deck next to the bowl. The cat should come up and start eating. While it's doing that, scratch it between the shoulder blades. Now you have a pet cat.

Don't feed it dry cat food because that causes feline diabetes. If you shop around, you should be able to get Friskees canned cat food for $0.30-$0.50 per can.

>>715369019
Op do the fly bait thing

That cat just wants to love you. I would love it back.

>>715369246
>don't feed it dry cat food because that causes feline diabetes
feed it dry dog food. That's what i do with my 2 cats

>>715366677
Not gonna read this thread - this simple.

Cat wants you to take care of it. Obviously. If you want to just feed it from a distance and slowly bring the food inside. He's yours.

Seems you don't want it, though. Don't be a dick.
Unfortunately the only way to get rid of a cat that thinks you're nice is to not be nice. So the solution is take it to the fucking shelter.

/thread

>>715368228
Where do you shit for half a week then

give him love

>>715366677
it likes you op, don't be a dick

>>715366677

It's a stray cat, dude.

Take it in. Slash its throat, pickle its eyes, and practice your dissection skills on it. Once organ removal is complete, skin it, and try some cat tacos.

Cat Taco recipe:
-Cut skinned meat into manageable pieces (think chicken strips)
-Tenderize chicken
-Marinate with a dash of cayenne pepper, a teaspoon of paprika, salt and pepper to taste, and olive oil
-Leave for at least 30 mins
-Grill that motherfucker or sautee it. If sautee, add several drops of lemon and 2-3 sprigs of thyme to enhance the flavor
-Serve with dishes that mix well with game dishes such as green beans, mashed potatoes, and boiled veggies.

>>715369019
>Be me cat
>Be disowned by everyone :(
>Walk to some guys do meowing to piss him off
>Kek he comes to the door
>He feeds me cheese not bad
>He's on the phone
>Think he's calling animal control :(
>Op if your reading this don't call them signed cat

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>>715369853

>>715367354
Feed a cat and he will be full

Teach a cat to feed itself and it will always feed itself and leave you alone

>>715367354
I didn't expect you to be that gullible OP. There is an old saying: You don't choose a cat; a cat chooses you. You are the Chosen One, so enjoy it. Cats are usually good buddies, and low maintenance.

>>715366677
Dude, just be nice to him and love him, cat's are the greatest, mine helped me soooo many times when i was suicidal and shit, just give him food and milk, then slowly and patiently make him used to you and your home, donpt be pushy, and if you dont know what to do i bet there are hundereds of websites and blogs about welcoming and living with cats.

Just love him.

>>715369853

you're a fucking piece of shit
i hope you know that

>>715368436
You can absolutely bring in a feral cat. I've had success about 90% of the time. The ones that didn't end up indoors just preferred to hang in the rusted truck out back and be my buds when I did yard work.

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>>715370079
Kek this

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>>715366677
Let it in. This be your cat. Like woman, but cat.

>>715370221
i mean if you're gonna eat it there's nothing really wrong with killing it quickly
just don't draw it out or something, that's sick
it's better than the cat starving slowly

give us a new picture of the happy cat now !

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>>715370856
Yeah pls

>>715369019
Seems cute OP and it likes you. May as well make it yours. Cats are easy to look after once they're house trained and even thats easy. And it may already be by the looks of it.

More like though it belongs to someone who keeps pets outside a lot so it roams around to visit other people. My parents have a cat that lives 4 doors down but it spends 10 hours a day following my Dad around it.. and they've never fed it once. Sometimes cats just dig you.

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>>715367815
>>715369853
>>715370549

>>715370549

Please take your moral faggotry elsewhere.

You think I give one fuck? I live in the city. I get these stray cats all the time. No one cares about a slit throat--or other things. The best way to consume them is through tacos or through slow cooking.

Humans, obviously, are a bit tougher to get away with, but still possible, even in the city.

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>>715369891
That requires trips.


It's still just fucking meowing at my god damn deck.

Dubs and I try to take it in.
( no guarantee of success but ill try )
Trips and animal control gets him.

>>715370856
Yes op. Gonna need more pictures of the cat.... That's in your house... Happy... Forever... With a new name.

>>715371151
roll for adoption

>>715371151
Even dubs saves it
Odd dubs names it

Roll nig nogs this faggot really isn't going to leave now that I fed the fucker

>>715371374
And again cause i'm a soft faggot

>>715371151
Rolling for dubs

this is for u cat

feed him, give him a name !

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>>715371113

Roll for animal shelter

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>>715371151
>>715371411
There you go op

>>715371411
WINRAR

>>715366677
Skinwalker

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>>715371411
Don't take him in straight away lure him with food

>>715371151
Roll for take in.

>>715366677
fill bathtub with water
take a bowl
fill up with milk
put bowl inside your house
wait for cat to drink the milk
close the door
get some rocks
get a sack
put cat inside of the sack
trow sack in your tub
take sack
go to your bind
problem solved

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>>715371489
>>715371538
>>715371411
WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE

NOW ITS MULTIPLIED

>>715371151
Just take it to a vet or shelter yourself. By the time this thread was created and is over it could already be fuckin gone. Rollin

>>715366677
Cats are weird, anon. Haven't you learned that by now?

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Enjoy your new furry friend, OP. :) Cats are great.

>>715371761
you are funny ! Try it with yourself first, to see if it works

>>715371808
Truth

you are the king of the cat

>>715371789
LOL what?

>>715371789
Even trips I try to take in the other one
Odd trips the other one gets controlled

>>715371789
Adopt both of them now

>>715371789
OP they're just neighbourhood cats walking around trying their luck for food before going home and eating even more food there.

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>>715371789

>>715371789
First cat was a bullshit scout should have killed it when you had the chance

>>715372111
winrar

>>715371151
dubs incoming

i hope i get quints and you kill that damn pest.
cats are the worst. you're stupid if you take this thing in just because some faggots talked you into it.

>>715371789
It might get interesting. See if they fight, and/or if cat #1 gets territorial... Adopt #1

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>>715371960
THERE'S TWO OF THEM NOW AND THEY KEEP STARING AT MY CHEESE
>>715372111
ANIMAL CONTROL WONT DO SHIT AGAINST MULTIPLYING CATS

WAT DO WAT DO

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>>715372111
Well op you got 2 cats now. Maybe 3 for quads

help them, give food

>>715372364
Take them in your house and love them OP

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Get a water gun and keep shooting it with water every time that you see it. It's not that hard.

>>715372364
They look the exact same probably came from same mother take them in bro feed them your little homies now

>>715367815
this is good advice. fuck all u faggots trying to make op keep the faggot cat

>>715372454
Roll

>>715372364
leave a cheese trail into your house

Dude that is someone's house cat that got left out and doesn't want to be.

You need to bring it inside, it's FUCKING MISERABLE OUT THERE

lighter fluid. zippo cats 2.0

>>715366677
every time it comes up to you spray it with water.

SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE SCREENSHOTS OF THIS THREAD I'M LAUGHING SO HARD I AWOKE EVERYONE.

>>715372592
>>715372584
These

>>715371151
There is no doubt in my mind that THE ONLY THING THAT CAT ONCES, the ONLY SINGLE THING, is to be in your house, warm, smashing its face into your soft body.

>>715371865
bin" i have done it menny times and it solves the problem... it get a bait weird when you start to see flyers around your neighborhood tho

>>715371151
If trips space programme

Take the cat in you retarded dipshit

just kick them a few times, or stomp down on them. that'll teach them to stay away and not annoy you again. if not, just repeat till they are dead or learned the lesson.

>>715372592
>>715372780
This.

Take it(them) and take pictures. Put fliers around the neighborhood, cats roam TWO SQUARE MILES, so plot an area two square miles in any direction around your house and flier it.

That is someone's cat, and they want it back. The other one, too, probably.

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She wants to make /b/ great again
>>715368370

>>715372744
Done but there shit only on tablet

>>715372562
that is cuz all faggets think stray rabies cats are pets... they are just like rats in the wild... you dont want em so be humane and kill em in a fast way so they dont suffer.

It's worth noting that in the wild cats use this technique to trick unsuspecting humans into inviting them into their homes.

What do they do once inside? Sleep on their face at night, killing them.

Absolute savages. Whatever you do, don't let them inside.

>>715373128
Almost no fucking cat has rabies, go fuck yourself.

If you knew anything about them, you would call the AIDs cats, because they all have feline AIDS. Retard.

>>715371151
roll

>>715373088
Fuck off

>>715372944
If those cats were lost they wouldn't be out prowling for food, they'd be in hiding. Cats rarely leave their territory anyway. I think they well know the area. They're also quite used to humans because a real feral cat wouldn't come so close, even when hungry.

Tuna with Tylenol crushed into it

>>715373289
That is a straight lie, and their territory is 2 square miles.

>feral cats ask for food
>house cats wouldn't beg humans to get in

You are legit fucking retarded.

By the way, I pet all my neighborhood cats because they're ALL PET CATS, AND THEY MEOW AT ME FOR ATTENTION

>>715373289
>if they were lost, they wouldn't eat

Yeah, fear makes cats stupid. They'd rather die, since they're sooooooo scared. Fuck the stomach pangs of hunger; sooooo just want to hide right now.

Fucking moron

>>715372944
domesticated cats roam about a tenth of a mile. only the feral beasts roam two miles

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>>715372364

>>715373506
Dude, fuck you, that study was done by putting GPS tracking on a housecat.

Stop fucking lying, you have no idea how feral cats work.

By the way, they only learn to meow at humans BY LIVING WITH THEM. THAT IS THE ONLY WAY, PERIOD.

FERAL CATS DONT LEARN TO MEOW, ONLY HISS

>>715369019
Quads for blowing its head off with a shotgun

>>715373495
Those cats look magnificent and in good shape though, doubt they're starving.

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>>715373639

>>715368493
This. Did this with a cat when I was a teen and he was my bro until the day he died.

>>715367072
3rdpostbestpost

>>715373665
NO SHIT, that's because IT'S ONLY BEEN LOCKED OUT OF HITS HOUSE FOR A FEW DAYS, AND THEYRE NOT STUPID ENOUGH TO JUST NOT EAT BECAUSE OF THAT.

My god, if a mammal doesn't eat during the winter they FREEZE TO DEATH..

Just get the fuck out of this thread, everything you say is complete bullshit. If you're not one person, everyone LIKE YOU needs to get out.

Don't talk about what you don't know about, fuck.

>>715368493
It can use litterboxes, because only domesticated cats meow at humans. This proves it's a domesticated cat automatically, google it. Meows aren't a wild cat language.

>>715373220
i dont know anything? i have been hunting strays for 17 years now. i have seen at least 30% of thos parasitestrays

>>715374072
Yes. You know NOTHING, you are a liar and a piece of this.

And hey, protip: "hunting" cats doesn't make you a BEHAVIORIST, OR A VETERINARIAN.

I can hunt all the deer I want it doesn't give me EVEN A MODICUM OF AUTHORITY to speak to the health of the wild deer population

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>>715373790
Calm down m8. Trust me I want kitties safe

>>715373790
I can understand one cat getting lost, but two of them? Bro and sis were just strolling until they didn't know the way back right? Or they're just roaming their territory scavenging for food like normal cats.

>>715373904
this is actually true they meow at their mothers when their kittens then learnt o meow at people. cats stop meowing in adolescence in the wild

>>715374231
what gives you the right then to tell everyone almost no cats got rabies you pleb?

>>715374231
>And hey, protip: "hunting" cats doesn't make you a BEHAVIORIST, OR A VETERINARIAN.

Just because You're a faggot for cats doesn't make you an expert on them

>>715374342
If you're not one of the "don't take the cats" bullshitters, don't worry about it.

I'm only white knighting for cats.

>>715374396
STATISTICS, YOU PLEB

>>715374344
They're probably just identical looking but actually totally unrelated; or they both got out when the person left their door open while they were gone, and they were too far gone when the guy got back.

Cat siblings do form lifelong bonds.

Just take the one that meowed at you, and if the other one SEEMS to be domesticated as well... probably don't neglect it. If it wanders off, it's probably feral and there's nothing you can do.

>>715374344
More like "lost to their human" which precludes them getting back inside. They're not lost in the traditional sense, they know exactly where their home is. Humans have work, and sleep, and can't hear a cat scratching at a FRONT DOOR even if the cat is smart enough to. Most aren't.

>>715374595
link statistics

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>>715374595
>From CDC

>>715374759
Nigga the burden of proof is on you with the claim "they're stray rabies cats"
>>715373128
watch some animal planet, dude.

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>>715374595
I'm with you all the way fellow cat lover

>>715374845
Woah! 300 a year? he's right, what an epidemic! Why, that's less stray cats than ONE CITY HAS.

by the way, if you're trying to compare them directly to dogs: it's because dogs are only let outside on leashes, you retard.

How about you compare it to raccoons or bats, you fucking idiot?

>>715374845
yes we are almost 2017 to old report and a pic dosnt count as proof

It's either a feral cat or a cat that lives nearby and his patrol includes running into you and asking for some food.
I have a few neighbor cats that wander over and say hello on my deck every day (different times tho, they mostly don't overlap their patrols). I don't feed them, they just like to swing by and meow and purr a bit then take off.
If it's feral it could be hungry but feeding it will make it come by a lot. If you don't want a cat and don't think it's a neighbor cat, you can find someone that does. No reason to be mean to it, it just wants to chill with you, dude.

>>715374983
>compare it to raccoons or bats, you fucking idiot?

This is definitely the truth of the matter. 300 a year is FUCKING NOTHING ACROSS AN ENTIRE NATION(graph didn't even say per anything, but cdc statistics aren't citywide), meanwhile nearly every single raccoon and bat are dying from it. IF you even get scratched by a wild animal, you have to go get rabies shots just in case.

Not with fucking feral cat scratches.

Source: had injuries from both an opossum and a cat and went to the hospital both times

>>715366677
Put it on fire if we get dubs or trips then put its body in a bag and shit in it

>>715375213
Reroll

>>715374878
I dont need to watch some bs catlover tv when i got first hand experience for 17 years

>>715374983
>>715375089
>Most recent statistics from a place that tracks these things, but yeah I mean doing 272 cats to 2000 bats, really that much of a difference, but I'm sure you will come up with another bullshit reason about the statistics

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>>715374983

>>715375327
>experience which leads me to believe cats are rabies vermin
>even though cdc statistics say under 300 cats per year IN THE ENTIRE COUNTRY, WHICH HAS HUNDREDS OF STRAY CATS IN EACH TOWN
>which is less than 1%
>so much less its not calculable

Stay sociopathic, cat hunter. If I met you in real, I'd hunt you a lot harder than you have any right to be hunted. You are not the most dangerous game; you are the most autistic game.

>>715375479
Thanks, brother.

So, there, what do you know. Bats and raccoons are hundreds of times more likely to carry rabies.

>>715369526
fucking /thread

>>715375606
Yeah but foxes are even less likely than cats, so you can go fuck yourself honestly

>>715371151
Dubs get

>>715375521
haha. who is sociopathic? when you would hunt me. I do my country a favor to get rid of strays.

>>715370464
this was a great kek

>>715375829
>hunting the innocent
>punishing the guilty
Yeah, ones sociopathic and one's righteous. One's borne of a lack of empathy, one's borne from copious empathy.

>>715375682
Because foxes live in holes in the woods and never bite humans, lol.

Are you under the impression this is "incidences of rabies among x animal when it went to the animal hospital?

Because it's not. Those don't exist. These are captured(mostly killed actually) animals after they bit humans, and animals that went crazy and ended up in humanized areas.

>>715366677
6, 4, 5, 9

>>715375682
So... yeah, all those stray foxes digging through my trash here in LA.


do you think they don't give people rabies because they're woodland animals and not vermin?

>>715376057
see
>>715375392
> but I'm sure you will come up with another bullshit reason about the statistics

>>715376057
strays are not innocent creatures at all if they where bigger they would kill and eat you without thinking twice

It might have kittens! See if it tries to get you to follow it.

>>715376326
What does that have to do with innocence?

>>715376778
cuz you being autistic and thing strays are the same as pet cats

>>715376906
think

>>715376323
>>715376326
I only argue with creatures that have brains.

No, larger cats would not just eat people, lol.

That's why rogue lions aren't "totally normal lions," and why when someone sees a lynx in the woods they won't die.

>>715376906
That's not me, you fucking retard. You're the one who thinks "the homeless are inferior to their housed brethren"

>>715376326
>if they where bigger they would kill and eat you without thinking twice
If you're older than 12 you need to take a huge stride back and look at yourself.

If you think that having broken as fuck english and poor critical thinking has nothing to do with being stupid... that's because you're too stupid to know.

>>715376906
That's really dumb

Take him

Pee in water gun, mark your territory

>>715367144
Milk is fucking terrible for cats. This isn't an anime.
>>715366677
OP just give it some meat or cat food treat it nice, let it inside and then have a new pet and nice story. Maybe tell it to grills and you can get a gf.

>>715377784
That's sort of a myth that isn't wrong and is still a myth.

I give my domestic cats whole cow's milk as a treat often, they don't get diarrhea from it. They do like it, as well, by nature.

It would probably give a feral cat diarrhea.

>>715377784
>cat based gf
Can confirm

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>>715366677
You know what to do faggot

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>>715368436
>>715370269
If it was truly feral it would avoid you or keep a serious distance.
If it is a stray then it was once a pet that strayed/got lost/was abandoned - so it can appreciate humans but may have trust issues.

I'm guessing it's a stray. So it could befriended. Something therapeutic for you and it. It will take time and it may never be a "cuddle of the couch" type of cat but still worth it.

>>715366677
throw rocks at it, or get a dog

>>715371761
>obv abused child
Is that what your parents tried before the drove you into the wild and abandoned you?

Feed and house one of the cats, shower it with love. Mock and disparage the other. Set out food and snatch it away as soon as the cat starts to eat. Shout obscenities at the cat. Profit.

>>715377985
>diarrhea
It not about that. Cows milk is hard for their kidneys to process. Cats are already vulnerable to a common cause of death in cats - kidney disease. Cows milk makes it worse and could shorten their lives.

I think it is the lactose in the milk.
Lactose-free cat milk is readily available at the at grocers.

>>715371151
roll for strangle it.

>>715368504
rolling for this

>>715380150
Not bothering to roll
I am going straight to strangling you
>Human race, you can thank me later.

>>715369019
OP fuck you for taking terrible photos that are still somehow high res.

Serious just do this. >>715367072

>>715369659
kek

>>715371151
Rolling

>>715372364
you're fucked op

put meat out.