Do these actually work for anxiety/depression? How long

>>714242219
Never taken Prozac. I take Lexapro. Works great. Took me a week to be back to normal!

>>714242328
I take amaturezac

Smoke weed instead newb

>>714242471
Well at least mine aren't filled with cum like your mothers asshole

i wish i could get anti depressants

>>714242992
Why can't you? just ask your doc.

>>714242219
Everyone's brain chemistry is different.
They either will or won't work for you. Only way to know is to try, or try a similar one in the same class.

>>714242219
Prozac (fluoxetine) is an SSRI so it'll at minimum kick in after 2-4wks (because it takes that long to desensitize the brain's negative feedback mechanisms and actually generate a net increase in serotonin). Once they kick in, the strength of effect they will have and how quickly they'll help sorta depends on the person They tend to be first line and work quite well in treatment of moderate to severe depression. If it doesn't work for you, there are many other drug classes that might.
If you're willing to put the effort in, I'd talk to your doc about CBT since that (especially in conjunction w/ medical treatment) works wonders.

>>714245305
thanks for the info

>>714242219
Pills dont work and I have been on the works.
1-Realize life is shit.
2-Most people give no fucks about you and WILL use you given the chance, male or female it doesn't matter.
3-Set your own goals, and never fucking let go. Feed of your fear and you will be fucking unstoppable.

>>714243184
too much of a pussy to admit there's a problem ya kno?

>>714246101
yes, medicine does work, don't be steve jobs. life isn't shit, and i don't care what people think about me. You know nothing about depression or anxiety, most symptoms are physical, it's not just mental

>>714246577
Not that guy.

It's either chemical or environmental depression. I, personally, have environmental depression, so meds didn't really help, other than helping me sleep, and I had to take fucking 400mg of Seroquel for that. Some people need to regulate their chemistry, some people need to get out of a shitty situation.

>>714242219
I've been on Prozac for a few months and It seems to work pretty decent for me but nothing works for everybody

>>714242328
I'm also on lexapro. It helped with my crippling depression and anxiety. So now instead of feeling like I'm drowning in sorrow I just feel nothing. Nothing at all. I'm just really numb and tired. Maybe i need to ask my doctor to up my dose? Or maybe switch to something else? I dont know. But nothingness is a whole lot better than what i was feeling before.
Also, what weird side effects have you had on it? It makes me yawn all the time. like all day just yawning even when well rested.

>>714246577
LOL I don't know nothing?
And if medicine works then why the fuck I spent 4 years using Bupropion, Sertraline, Escitalopram, Trazodone and they did shit?
At best Bupropion made me a fucking zombie, I wasn't sad, but I wasn't happy, I wasn't angry, I was just a machine.
And I know nothing about anxiety? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
I was given 2mg Alprazolam and even up to 5mg Clonazepan.
So I believe I know that pills are fucking useless.

>>714246876
Yes. Both are related... one leads to another but thankfully a joint effort from both a Psychologist and a psychiatrist got me out from that hell hole

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imagine that your mood is like driving a car down an eight-lane freeway. when you're happy, your car pulls to the left. when you're depressed, it pulls to the right.

prozac drags your car to the middle and holds it there so you can't go left or right. you don't feel depressed, but you can't feel happy, either. it's like being a robot.

that might sound good after being depressed, but i did it for three years and then dropped it. i'd rather be depressed 90% of the time and happy 10%, than feel nothing ever.

>>714247270
What a shitty life. Im sorry for you. Id rather fee something, even shitty, then nothing.

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>>714246527
just tell your doc that you had a sad and want to go onto antidepressants.

>>714246527
was the same as you. for 5 years I've been severely depressed and i got to a point where i was doing dangerous and stupid shit hoping to die. Finally talked to my doctor and she put me on Lexapro. It has helped tremendously. I wont say its perfect, but it's definitely worth talking to your doctor about. Dont be a pussy. I chickened out of 3 appointments with her before i finally was able to go.

>>714247449
Can be related. It could also just be a vicious cycle.
There isn't one cookie cutter explanation for depression, other than it's a pattern of behavior that has become the default.

>>714246577
Also I am not making fun of you, I looked for help and found it here on 4chan. Im being 100% serious, it's all you, you need to FEED of whatever it is that troubles you. Pills might make you feel "ok" but they aint fixing shit.

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>>714247270
i'd say "enjoy being a robot", but you can't enjoy anything on antidepressants.

>>714247290
that's like if you ate good and exercised but still had a heart attack, and then you go around saying diet and exercise aren't good for your heart.

>>714247270
Dude it makes me yawn and clench my jaw so fucking much

>>714247553
sometimes i think so too, but it was like drowning. Like i was constantly out of breath and sinking. nothingness isnt ideal, but anything is better than what i felt before. I will talk to her about maybe trying another ssri though.

>>714242219
ssri's do work.

SSRIs balance your emotions--your lows won't be as low, but your highs won't be as high, either. You might also have a harder time getting off--it's far from impossible but your fap sessions might last 15 minutes instead of 5 (you might taking longer to nut during sex, too.)

If your sadness/anxiety is becoming so overbearing that it's effecting your ability to function in society, then you may want to make these compromises (that's especially true if you've recently considered suicide seriously).

Two years ago I lost my dream job, couldn't sleep for hours due to anxiety and the feelings of worthlessness I experienced. I used Lexapro for about a year and a half and the drugs helped take my mind off the dark stuff so I could work on getting my life back in order (the thoughts still came, but I didn't have the same level of agita). Once things got better, my inner monologue stopped beating the shit out of me--I realized i didn't need them anymore and stopped. So for sure, they helped.

BTW, you're going to encounter a lot of folks waxing cliche like "be strong" or "just buckle up." Fuck them. Consult a psychiatrist, see if they think you should take these meds. If you get a prescription, tell them about any side-effects you may experience and always follow their advice on dosage.

Hope things work out.

>>714246876
Shitty situations predispose and can trigger/perpetuate depression and need to be worked on to have any shot at moving past it but all depression has underlying pathophysiology (we're just not 100% sure what it is just yet). Hence CBT or the myriad of other therapies for helping people work through their shit situations.

>>714246054
No worries, good luck OP. Don't give up.

>>714247290
If you think a single anecdotal experience outranks the current therapeutic guidelines for modern psychiatry then yes you don't know anything. The drugs don't work for everyone, and they often don't work in the way people expect them to. That's why, as I've said a few times this thread, therapy like CBT coupled w/ a good relationship with your therapist works wonders in conjunction with medical therapy.
I'm sorry to hear the meds haven't worked for you man, it's true they don't work for everyone, but don't discourage OP from seeking help based on your experience alone.

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>>714247601
fucking idiot, you don't take antidepressants because you "feel sad".

you take them as a last resort if your life is a relentless pantomime of misery and pain. not because you're "feeling down because that cute girl on facebook ignored me". you take them because you spend your life curled up in a ball in the closet crying and wishing you could stop vomiting blood. you fucking attention-seeking wuss.

>>714247755
fuck its awful. My jaw fucking hurts now from clenching so much. And people at work always think I dont get any sleep because of the fucking yawning.

On a side not what do I say to the doc to get an adderal script

>>714242219
I take Prozac (40mg). Hasn't done shit even after bumping up to 40mg.

I took prozac and it helped for two weeks, then I tried to kill myself. I just felt less anxiety about going through with it.

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>>714247270
the side effects suck tho
i had stopped taking sertraline because it was taking over an hour to fap,
also,you know that feeling you get when you yawn,I stopped having that so my yawns were just over-inhaling.
>pic related

>>714247270
Same advice I gave op. Pills make you feel zombie, they DO NOT fix shit, just stabilize your mood. Get a psychologist too, not one.... BOTH are needed. Best of luck and its not over, keep pushing, never let go.

>>714248071
"Hey doc, I sprained my pinky"

>>714247707
Hahahaha its not the same.
I'm just saying there is no damn magic pill.
You either face whatever the fuck it is you have or enjoy being dead inside for life

>>714247877
15 minutes i fucking wish. Its actually had a really negative impact on my sex life. I've always had the problem of lasting too long, upwards of 1-2 hours. But now I cant get off in less than 3 hours. My wife thinks its her fault, and its super fucking frustrating. Dont have a problem getting aroused or keeping it hard, and she orgasms multiple times. But it feels like a fucking chore now to the point of not even wanting to go through the hassle of sex anymore. Am on Lexapro. Adderall was bad too but FUCK lexapro is on a whole other level.

>>714247832
I see what where you are coming from, sort of. After quitting a stimulant addiction the comedown was worse than anything, indescribable. However that was due to chemical imbalances in the brain. Its hard to be that unbalanced without the use of fucked drugs. Still possible though. I use to be very depressed after my motorcycle accident, and what helped me was simply to stay productive. Like physically do something, even if it is stupid, just do it. For me I needed to exercise my brain to produce more serotonin and dopamine after getting in an accident and feeling horrible and being immobile for a long time (environmental depression) then turning to drugs causing chemical depletion in the brain (chemical depression). Hope you figure something out bud, with you the best.

>>714247665
idk i might be seeing my doc soon. well see if i can fit it in somewhere but I'm pretty sure i'll continue putting it off for a couple of years.

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What about for ED? Tried Viagra and Cialis and didn't do shit. I know it's from too much porn since I stopped watching porn for a month and was starting to get regular erections.

>>714247884
Yeah. Basically, the way I understand it, your brain is a computer. It's running the program (thought pattern/habit/etc) it has been given to parse new inputs (evaluate and react to reality) constantly. You change that by running a better program enough times that it gets a higher priority to run than the faulty depression program has. Medication helps debug the depression program so it doesn't take up all the resources so you can't run anything else. Therapy helps give you the user permissions to run the new program. But only you can run that program over and over until it becomes the default program.

>>714248493
Well, I was on like the lowest dosage. One thing that also helped with my impotency was cutting the pill in halves, taking one half in the morning and the other at night. My psychiatrist recommended that and it worked, but you should probably ask yours if that's safe in your case.

>>714247923
Depression does not necessarily manifest itself the same in everyone. Neither does it make people cry in closets or vomit blood.

Are you descended from mongoloids?

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>>714247923
no,you''re taking them because you feel sad.
I'm just not being a whiny emo faggot about how my sadness is "crushing the life and souls of myself and those around me.....:
you fucking emo fairycake.

>>714247923
holy fucking shit this so much.

>>714248757
stop being a faggot like that guy.

>>714247884
I did not discourage him, I am telling him to take full responsabilty for himself. Also while I speak for myself am not the only one who got sick of everything and decided to take charge of myself and stop taking robot pills.
Also if you are gonna talk about guidelines... you then know that both professionals are better than either alone AND that cognitive therapy can get you the fuck out of depression and burn it down while pills keep the voices down.

>>714248154
Lexapro helped for the first 3 weeks, then it felt like i wasnt taking anything at all. If anything the anxiety came back 2x stronger. Where do I go from here? What do i do?

>>714248659
It's best if you talk to your doc. There's nothing wrong with admitting you have a problem. The pills make the horrible days manageable and the better days great

>>714248493
also, you saying adderral made you impotent? That shit made me bust in a second.

>>714248892
Talk to your doctor, man.

>>714248969
made me crave anal stimulation (no I'm not joking, at all, it really made me want prostate stimulation) and made it take longer to nut. Went from nutting in an hour to 2 hours. lexapro from 1 hour to 3. Dont have problem getting an erection or keeping it, just made it take longer to nut.

Am not on adderall anymore. It was exacerbating my anxiety. Only lexapro now. I still have trouble focusing, but since I dont have crippling anxiety anymore i can just deal with it.

>>714248889
You straight up told him medical therapy doesn't work. It didn't work for you, it might work for him. Taking antidepressants isn't somehow not 'taking full responsibility of yourself'. Seeking help in any form is an important first step and it's good OP is doing that. Whether he chooses to take medication or not, it's still taking responsibility and acting to better his life. And yes, I'm aware your not the only person who's not had meds work for them, I'm trying to convey to you that it's a variable thing but they do work well for many people, hence why they're the recommended treatment.

And if you read literally any of my posts, you'll see that in each and every one of them I've recommended CBT. I was literally the first person in this thread to even mention therapy. As I've said repeatedly, CBT in conjunction w/ drugs works well.

OP, sometimes your doc will offer you the choice between CBT and drugs (or both) and that can mean the severity of your depression is at a level where drugs and CBT are as effective as each other. Ask your doc if one over the other is more suited to your situation, cause according to eTG at least, therapy is equally as effective as pharmacological treatment in treating moderate depression (and often preferred in mild depression).

TLDR; talk to your doc, see what they recommend based on how severe your case is.

>>714242219
They dont work.

I'm on Prozac and it has helped immesnely. I still get anxiety but much less than before.

>>714249729
If you're looking for ADD stuff, Vyvanse helped me a lot more than adderal. It's timed release so you only need it once a day, and didn't make me as anxious/impulsive as adderal did. Of course people react to drugs differently, but it might be worth talking to your doc about.

>>714249891
Ok re read my posts... My bad lol
I got carried away

>>714248896
Idk we will see. I think I'd a lot happier on like a ndri than an ssri but then again I'll probably have to talk to her.

>>714250070
you think it'd be okay to take with lexapro?

>>714250172
amphetamines and ssris don't typically interact, as far as i know. I was prescribed both at the same time from the same psychiatrist. Again, talk to your doc.

>>714250408
thanks. I'll def talk to her about it.

>>714248969
Man fuck adderall. Horny all the fucking time but if I try to edge at all, my dick will just start leaking uncontrollably.
So I either have to have sub-optimal, quick faps or drawn out ones with an unsatisfying dry orgasm.

Been on a bunch of other add meds, but none have helped in the same way

Feelsbadman


>>714248071
I have problems with losing focus while reading books. Mind starts wandering and I have to re-read entire pages. I told my doctor about it and she gave me an ADHD test.

Being able to read above a middle school level is fucking amazing though. So much shit I missed. Shame it makes my dick retarded.

Good luck abusing the system anon

>>714248722
Kinda. Current theories of depression state that the underlying pathophys is a lack of baseline dopamine (DA) release in the brain's reward pathways meaning your baseline 'level of happiness' is lowered. DA release is mediated by serotonin release in these pathways, and the current theory is that serotonin neurons inhibit themselves too strongly in cases of depression. Thus less serotonin means less dopamine means less happiness.

What SSRIs like Prozac do is block serotonin from being removed from the area where it activates DA release, so there's more serotonin hanging around and thus more available to increase DA release. This takes a while because at first the massive increase in serotonin is recognised by the brain and so in response it decreases its production of serotonin. Eventually this response stops and the net levels of serotonin increase, which is why SSRIs and similar monoamine reuptake blockers take so long (2-4wk minimum) to kick in. This also does nothing to fix the predisposing factors and underlying life issues though.

CBT and other therapies aim to change the way depressed patients think about their lives and perceive situations, they try to change the way you see the world, but they're only effective if the patient is into it and goes along with it. In those cases though, they're really good. They work if you want to change and you're willing to put the effort in to do so.

>>714250172
Welbutrin is used for both depression and ADD. I never saw the ADD benefits so I'm on a stimulant in addition to it, but maybe it would work for you. Helps with my depression pretty well though.
Fuck SSRIs. Welbutrin is the only antidepressant that didn't completely obliterate my sex drive.

>>714247832
Honestly any ssri will do that to you. What I would suggest and what worked for me was taking the ssri and then fixing the shit that was causing me to feel like shit then going off the ssri. ssri's or most medications for mental problems aren't meant to be the solutions but to help you until you find the solution. Best advice tho is to just continue trying to make your life better because eventually it will work.

>>714247538
Really? Not for me I still have emotions I just don't really get down to the lowest of the low anymore. I've been on it for a year. And i'm on seroquel as well which acts as a stabilizer so my car should be glued to the middle of the road

>>714250752
Yeah. I have a base understanding. Been to therapy for it my whole life, and I generally find it fascinating. I described roughly how treatments more than the reasons why the treatments work and what the depression affects chemically in my metaphor.

Nice talking to someone who knows their shit. It's refreshing.

>>714248457
I see what your saying and agree. The words I always use are pill are great for treating the symptoms of mental illness but the person suffering from it has to actually solve the problem to overcome the illness. This doesn't really apply to things like chemical imbalances that are physiological in nature rather than psychological in nature.

>>714251697
Yeah all g. Hope things are going well for you anon.

If anyone is bouncing between antidepressants/anxiety meds and not getting any help, try asking your doctor if they can do a gene test. They just swab your mouth and it will come back showing which meds you will get the best results from and which could give you bad side effects.

The meds I was taking at the time were in the bad column, so the psych put me on the shit in the good column and it was like night and day.

Make sure your insurance covers it first though. I almost got fucked by my insurance company saying they weren't going to pay for it at first.

>>714242219
Getting crazy debilitating panic attacks on trains because I feel trapped. It's started happening every s often in cars too, especially long distance when I know even if I got out I'd have to get back in.

What meds/techniques work. I fixed this for a year by exposure therapying myself, but the fucking things back.

>>714251938
Ehh. I'm forcing my life to be as stable as I'll get. Not on meds currently. My responses to them seemed to indicate that my depression is definitively more environmentally caused. So for now, I'm existing. I'll either eventually find the motivation to change, or I won't.

Not that I'm expecting a miracle, just that those are the only possible outcomes that exist.

>>714252272
my wife has the same thing. She stopped being able to drive, it got so bad. Doctor put her on clonazepan(or klonopin, cant remember which) and it helper her immensely

>>714252602
you're allowed to drive on benzo's ?

>>714252602
Klonopin is a brand name, containing the generic drug Clonazepam.

>>714247884
Fuck off psychofascist. Stop pathologizing rational human reactions to unbearable circumstances. People aren't sick, the world is sick.

>>714253067
there you go then. Yeah it really helped her out. she would have these really bad panic attacks that would just immobilize her. She still gets a bit anxious but with the drug she can deal with these situation.

>>714252272
Any benzo would probably help(valium, xanax, klonopin). Just take them preemptively. Don't wait till you start freaking out on the train to take it.
My doctor was really hesitant to prescribe it to me since I was young, and piss tested me before I could get it. Maybe prepare for that if you take anything illegally.

If you want to go for a non-medication route, try the square breathing thing. That helps me sometimes in emergencies. Breathe in through nose for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale through mouth for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, repeat.

>>714252761
You can as long as you don't get loopy off it. Wait to see how it affects your motor skills before you try. If you're driving like a retard on xanax and get pulled over, you'd probably get arrested for DUI.

>>714253073
Ooh, I bet anarchy would be so much better, right? Fuck the system and whatnot!

>>714253374
You are implying things are great? Our society is so sick people need to drug themselves just to get through the day for made up mental illnesses. The mind is a metaphor, it cannot be ill. The brain can be ill.

>>714253849
>made up mental illness
>hasn't seen brain scans of different mental illnesses
Ok. So maybe look into things before you dismiss them. Is the world flat, too? Oh, and chemtrails, right?

>>714242219
If you want something for anxiety I recommend glinko biloba extract, it's a natural herb and its relatively cheap and works for me

>>714254097
>The mind is a metaphor it cannot be ill. The brain can be ill
>The brain can be ill
>The brain
>"brain scans"

Learn to read, then try again.

>>714254315
>asserting an asinine line exists
>not understanding that mental illness can be chemical or a learned pattern of behavior
So what, you'd rather just take some herb and call it good? People just need to take a shroom trip and that'll heal all their sorrows?

>>714254574
People need to cultivate meaningful relationships and a sense of control in their life. That is, after meeting their basic material needs. If society gets in the way of that at any step of the way, then society is at fault, not them or their psychology. Hard to have meaningful relationships and a sense of control and have your material needs met in a society of commodification and exploitation.

But nice strawman, bro.

>>714254938
Look, I'm shitposting as hard as I can, here. I could try to kick it up a notch if you'd like. I'm half tempted to call you Mulder, but he was actually right. Do you wear the tinfoil hat on your head, to keep the aliens out of your "mind" or on your ass, to prevent them from probing it?

>>714254574
Not the guy you are arguing with but with problems that are psychological the answer is therapy and working through the shit on medicating so you don't feel it. Meds can help to deal with stuff but to actually solve it you need to fix the cause not the symptoms

>>714255180
That isn't a real response. Give me a real response, I want to see your counterargument. Prove me wrong if you are able to.

>>714255248
I'm not arguing. I'm busy shitposting. It's a very important, thankless job, but someone has to do it.

>>714252272
For anxiety, there's long-term and short-term treatments. SSRIs (fluoxetine, sertraline, etc) and SNRIs (des/venlafaxine) are first line for long-term, however imipramine (a TCA) can be used for panic disorder.

Short-term drugs do symptom management, helping to stop the physical manifestations of your panic attacks. Here you're looking at stuff like Beta Blockers (propranolol) or benzos (clonazepam, etc).
Beta blockers act exclusively to reduce sympathetic symptoms (hyperventilating, rapid heart rate, palpitations, tremors etc) but if you have any sort of lung issues like asthma or whatever you need to be careful.
Benzos are kind of like a blanket drug for general central nervous system inhibition, they reduce anxiety and help prevent panic attacks but should only be used in the short term. They're extremely addictive and addiction can develop within days of continued use, and any prolonged use requires you to be weened off them slowly. Some of them can also have hypnotic/sleep-inducing effects. That said, they're pretty potent.

Ultimately, you'll need to talk to your doc about what exactly is right for you and your situation, those are just some of the more common options. Good luck!

>>714252454
I hope you come into that motivation at some point anon. Do you have people you can at least talk to about this sort of stuff?

>>714253073
Yeah, nah, people are sick, mental illness is real, and idiots like you are the reason there's such a stigma around seeking help. Stop acting like 'the mind' is some wishy-washy distinction that's disconnected from the anatomical brain. Every illness has underlying pathophysiology, that most definitely goes for mental illness too. Dumbasses like you are the reason people think they can get better without proper help or that it's all in their head.

>>714242219
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pA8DdkM2Wqo

>>714242328
They told me to take lexapro when I was in a psych ward but I decided against it. Heard it gives you limp dick. Also prozac is awful. Along with Zoloft.

>>714255538
I'm not saying its all in their heads, its in their social context. You can prescribe someone a better life. Brain disease exists, but most of what gets passed off as "mental illness" is a subjective pathology of a rational response to terrible life circumstances. That is stigmatizing, saying someone who is struggling because, well, life's a fucking struggle is sick in the head when most of them just aren't.

>>714255833
*Can't prescribe

>>714255538
I see a therapist biweekly to vent, but that's mostly just to keep my mom not freaking out like she does when I don't go. I'm trying to be the least impactful I can, since last time I did anything about it, I woke up in the hospital with an unusual blood pressure a couple of days later. But I apparently have a liver of fucking cast iron, so I've got that going for me, which is nice. I don't really enjoy complaining about my depression, mostly because I'm unwilling to do anything about it. Doesn't seem reasonable to me.

>>714247695
Wrong. I enjoyed ice cream while on antidepressants.
So much ice cream.

>>714251200
agreed. Welbutrin was the only anti depressant out of 7 that actually helped.

I'd say that and exercise were the two biggest factors.

>>714254938
You do realise crippling depression or other mental illness is precisely the thing that stops many people from actually pursuing such relationships and attaining proper control right? That the anhedonia, social isolation and severe lack of motivation and energy that often accompanies full-blown depressive disorders serves to make functioning extremely difficult for many people? All of this only serves to worsen the situation that they're in - that is an illness.

This sort of thing does indeed come about because of social context, it is indeed perpetuated by social context yes I agree with you there, however it is not entirely environmental. There is underlying pathophysiology, and it's not stigmatizing to recognize the truth. Your responses show a severe lack of understanding of the concepts and goals of modern psychiatric treatment. You can't 'prescribe' someone a better life, no, but no psychiatrist aims to do that. The goal instead is to help people improve their life, and help them to change the way they view the world and break the negative thought cycle that underlies mental illness. Meanwhile, drug treatment seeks to target the physiological underpinnings of the disease. There is no denying antidepressants work for (most) people. The studies show it. If depressive disorders had no physiological component as you suggest, then there would be no indication that antidepressants work.

"Life is shit right now, so I'm just going to give up completely, withdraw socially, stop doing the things I enjoy, have a severe lack of energy and motivation, fail to concentrate, and also manifest many physical symptoms" is not a 'rational response' by any means (in the long term at least, grief is a normal thing). If you think it is a normal way of thinking, I'd suggest you yourself display depressive traits because honestly man, no one should have to live like that. Who are you to say mental illness is fake? Are you a psych? Have you researched this shit?

>>714242219
It's an ssri, very effective for when depression and anxiety occur together. usually takes 1-3 weeks to see effects up to 4 to see full effects. it also depends person to person, what works well for someone may not work well for you..

>>714256029
I'm glad to hear you're speaking to someone. Anon, I get the impression you see you and your mental illness as a burden on others but like that's not a good way to think about it man, and it's just going to worsen your situation. Depression isn't something to be ashamed of, it's not something you need to bottle up and suppress and keep deep down inside. If you need to talk about it to friends or family, I'm sure they'd care enough to want to do whatever they can to help, and they'd be perfectly fine with talking to you about stuff like that or working to accommodate what you need. It sucks feeling like a burden but realise that your friends/fam don't necessarily view it that way, you don't come across like that to them, they just want you to be okay. And if they do think you're a burden, then they're not very good friends tbh.

And it's perfectly reasonable to still complain even if you're not doing something about it. Taking the steps to move through it is a really difficult thing to do, just because you haven't gotten to the point where you feel ready for that, doesn't mean you have to just grit your teeth and push down the frustrations or whatever of dealing with it. Your feelings are valid. Although it seems to me that you are doing something about it by seeing a therapist, and I'm really glad to hear that man. I honestly hope things do look up for you dude, stick it out!