>in my room browsing /e/ and deviantart >mom comes in >"anon,

>grab the shitjug I was concealing under my trench coat

story confirmed for true

>>714108486
Op is your mum alright? Is she still alive?

You need to take a look at your life, your mum just wants what's best for you, she went through years if sacrifice to raise you and you repay her like this, you barely function as a human being, im sure your life would be happier if you just gave up this pretend shit, get outside and meet people dint ruin other people's lives just because you've ruined your own

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>>714109081

>>714109081
If this piece of trash were my son I'd have smothered him in his sleep ages ago.

>>714110280
Same

How can you not be ashamed of that lowlife faggot, i bet if he was your son and you murdered the police would let you off because of how much of a sad cunt he is

>>714110482
Murdered him*

>>714108486
include me in the screencap
nolan is a faggot

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>Mom gets off work early without calling first
>Finds me in the pantry emptying my poop jug into the cat's litter box
>Starts yelling at me, saying that I'm fucking disgusting
>Tell her that it's all her fault for breaking up with my dad when I was six
>She tells me that I need to be an adult
>Cry and scream and even throw my shit jug at her
>She says that from now on I have to go to bed before midnight
>Tell her to fuck off and go to my room
>Don't go to bed because it's fucking bullshit and I'm not a god damn wage slave
>She opens the door flat out at like one AM and is really pissed
>Tries to push me away from the computer, but I'm too heavy
>I start yelling at the top of my lungs
>She rips my computer tower out of the wall and takes it up to her room
>Knows I'm too fat to climb the stairs and thinks shes won
>Lay down at the bottom of the stairs and scream until my throat hurts
>Still no computer
>She goes to work the next day
>Wake up at like 3 PM and no computer
>Bitch has fucking overstepped her boundaries now
>Go into the bathroom and lift top off toilet tank so I can shit in it
>Sitting on tank and begin to turtle-head when I get an idea
>Pucker up my ass and waddle into the kitchen
>Take huge shit in the microwave and set the timer for three hours
>Mom comes home an hour later and the whole house fucking reeks
>She's screaming about a fire in the kitchen
>Can hear her crying for hours and even hear firemen stamping around
>Later that evening she comes in sobbing
>Sets up my computer tower for me
Flawless victory

>>714109889
ITS NOT BAIT GODDAMMIT

All these newfags REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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>Birthday last week
>Mama got me the Littlest Pet Shop cake I wanted
>Get a card from grammy
>"Enjoy your birthday, sorry I couldn't be there sweety, I hope you can use this"
>A lot of weird green paper in there
>Mamas eyes get big
>Ask her what these are
>"It's money, I use it to buy your chicken and videogames"
>"Can I trade it for good boy points?"
>"Yes you can, of course you can"
>then new daddy walks into the room
>smells like smoke and adult apple juice
>slaps mamas butt
>sees the money
>"I need this for the poker game tonight"
>Mama says no, I traded it with her
>He slaps her faces butt now
>Mama screams
>I'm sitting there eating my cake
>Ask her when dinner is ready
>She says I gotta help her
>This FUCKING NORMIE
>ASKS ME
>TO HELP HER
>ON MY OWN BIRTHDAY
>take off all my clothes and jump on the table
>Press my willy in the cake and run to mama screaming at the top of my lungs flailing my arms
>hit mama in the belly
>hear a loud oomf
>new daddy looks at me
>I look at him
>I get down on my knees and grab his crotch
>he goes back and asks me what I'm doing
>I just wanted to show him I can be mama too
>Run at him and bite him in his crotch
>even though he wore pants he dropped to the ground crying
>now everyone was crying
>my diaper has been full the whole time
>put some cake in diaper since mama isnt changing it and feed it to new daddy
>new daddy never came back after the poker game
>mama made me fresh chicken tendies with a side of pizza that night
>she didn't even charge my good boy points
>best 40th birthday ever

>>714111258
I'M NOT NEW FUCK YOU FAGGOT

>>714108486
>chicken nuggets

They're called tendies faggot

>>714111921
Tendies and nugs are 2 diffrent things normie

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>everyone is out of town for the weekend
>have mdma and viagra stashed away
>ultimate fap weekend is a go
>pills kicking in, things are feeling good
>want to grind my dick on something soft, wander into sisters closet
>she a huge raver so costumes and fun fur is everywhere
>start rubbing cock on a fluffy legwarmer
>something inside me snaps, and i see a pair of her nylons
>start putting them on, holy christ it feels good
>pills hitting hard now, eyes are rolling
>put on panties, then pair of big fur boots, dick rock hard
>grab a corset and start squeezing myself in, every time i pull the strings to make it tighter i feel like cumming
>put on a fun fur jacket over it, then a poofy tutu
>oh god we arent done yet, she has wigs
>big sparkling pink wig goes on, i start playing with makeup and cake it on my face
>dick is dripping through the panties, im swishing around in her raver costume now and dancing
>she has a big fur hood, thats what i need to complete everything
>oh ho, whats this, a pair of handcuffs under everything, sis is into bondage
>without thinking i snap them on my wrists behind my back and start bouncing around, the drugs practically have me cuming as i feel the furry outfit squishing all around me
>trip and fall down, core strength is weak and the corset is tight, can barely move
>try to get up, its not happening
>fun fur and wig blinding me, cant shake them off
>terror strikes me just as the drugs start peaking
>oh fuck it, start grinding against one of the legwarmers on the ground
>within a minute i have a mind shattering orgasm and scream like im being sent to auschwitz
>sudden commotion downstairs
>"ARE YOU ALRIGHT"
>oh shit
>someones home
>im high as fuck
>im in a fur raver costume
>feet coming up the stairs
>rolling frantically off legwarmer, huge cumstain leaking out from panties onto floor
>door opens

>>714112243
go on

>>714112243
WAIT! I NEED CLOSURE ON THAT ANECDOTE.

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This i a good thread :D

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>5:45 PM
>Wake up from a particularly intense visit to tumblrs paw fetish tag
>Even managed to stretch over my belly and reach my peepee long enough to cum with out mummys help
>Awake now, I feel the need for about 50 tendies and an extra large glass of chokie pudding to wash it down
>Press the intercom I had mommy install for my birthday last year
>"TENDIES TENDIES AND CHOKIE PUDDY!"
>If this cunt is too stupid to decipher THAT, then she's beyond all fucking help
>Mommy sprints up the stairs 20 minutes later with 2 50 piece nuggets from mcdonalds and a large jug of puddy
>Nuggets
>"Do it again or I'll fucking kill myself and light the house on fire right before I pull the fucking trigger."
>"Wha- Oh right! Tendies, not nuggies! I'm so so sorry honey..."
>"Honey'
>Fucking HONEY
>Mommy knows I like to be called her sweetpea
>Roll out of bed and lunge at her, the poopoo from last weeks Poofap party in hand
>Smash it into her fucking face as hard as I can while screaming "POOPOO POISON PAWNCH!!!"
>Mommy falls backwards into the radiator, but this has happened so many times her skull is calloused enough to tank the shot, she scrambles to her feet and rushes back to the car
>By the time she returns, I've eaten all the nuggies and puddy
>She has the 50 tendies
>But no new puddy

Guys, I try to be understanding but this is borderline child neglect. How do I show her that this is unacceptable? It's obvious my gentle reminders won't be as effective now that her skull doesn't crack on the radiator anymore.

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>>714112243
If I don't see this story to fruition I'm going to poop my pants.

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>Be me, working on my minecraft peaceful world
>mummy comes in, hands up in submission
>"a-anon... It's time for your doctors appointment..."
>look her dead in the face
>"if you make me go to that jew Doctor I'm going to shit in your fucking bed."
>"now anon, if you behave... I'll give you a triple Tendie meal from anywhere you want."
>sold, but resolve to give her as hard a time as possible to punish her for not just GIVING me the triple tendies for being her perfect little baby boy
>get in the car
>"oh boy mommy, I really do need to go to the docy docs! I am feeling so... Sick!"
>shit my big boy pants
>she screams at me to get out of the car so she can clean it, say no, docy docs now!
>she reluctantly drives me over, go inside office and wipe my shit on the Windows
>she apologizes, pays for damages and we wait for the doctor
>mommys shoe starts to dangle off her heel
>start jerking off
>mommy sees me and desperately whispers at me to stop before someone notices
>moan as loud as I can
>she's in tears now
>look her in the eye
>"Touch my cock, whore." I say loud enough for the whole room to hear
>she sobs loudly and shakes her head no
>pinch her nipple and twist until she agrees and gives me cummies
>Doctor calls me in, immediately call him a kike
>spend whole checkup farting, pissing, and belching strategically to ruin the doctors day
>checkup finally ends, mom is still sobbing
>"triple Tendie time now mummy!"
>lets out a louder sob and rushes to the car, me in pursuit
>"wh-where do you want tendies from, anon?"
>tell her I want wendies tendies
>she takes me to wendies, and we discover, to her horror, that they only have nuggets now.
>REEEEE at her while shitting and pissing myself
>she rushes me home and leaves me there, saying she'll be back soon with as many tendies as I can eat
>comes home 20 minutes later with 7 orders of Popeyes tendies
>smile and thank her
>she sighs with relief and decides to take a nap after her ordeal
>Left her a surprise in bed

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>>714108486
>>grab the shitjug I was concealing under my trench coat
lost my shit here.

Are there any stories where the mom gets the shit beat out of her

>>714113980
That sounds like a pretty lenient doctor's office

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>>714111687

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>wake up at noon
>30 year old NEET
>had accident in sleep which I rolled around in
>grab cum-towel off nightstand and do my best wipe mess from my folds of fat
>tummy gurgles loudly, so hungry
>plop out of bed, navigate through shit jugs and piss bottles in my room
>waddle downstairs to check GBP board
>wait a minute to catch my breath before I look
>just enough Good Boy Points for some tendies and sauce!
>legs buckle under own weight
>roll myself into the living room where mummy is watching her favorite soap opera
>"mummy mummy I have enough Good Boy Points for some tendies!"
>she turns to me with the most disgusting look on her face while I lay flat on the ground stuggling to get up
>"s-sure honey, le-let me just get some tendies for you"
>she struggles to go to the kitchen without vomitting from the smell and sight of my obese, putrid, feces and semen covered body
>she pulls the tendies out of the freezer after letting the oven heat up as she begins to cry into the sink
>I roll over and pull myself up to my high chair that starts to creak as I sit down
>have my crayons and Power Rangers coloring book to occupy me while I wait
>the tendies are finally done and she puts them on my plate
>she can't hold back the vomit as I open my mouth to eat some tendies and vomits all over my plate
>I can't let these tendies go to waste, so I eat them along with the vomit
>"yummy wummy tendies in my tummy, thanks mummy"
>do my best to muster a smile but the rows of decaying teeth only disgust mummy further
>high-chair finally breaks from my heft
>causes me to have another accident
>mum runs away to her room, sobbing uncontrollably, so ashamed of her baby boy
>I just sit there on floor, in my own filth, thinking about what a disappointment I am
>mfw

>>714114913
>>have my crayons and Power Rangers coloring book to occupy me while I wait
Why is this the most depressing part?

>>714115834
because it's the most relatable part

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>be a 27 year old NEET
>wake up at 6PM and roll out of my racecar bed
>piss jugs are all full, have to use the toilet like some subhuman normie
>waddle downstairs to find mummy for my wakey-wakey tendies and bakey
>lights off, nobody there
>there is a note on the refrigerator
>"Pumpkin, your new daddy Leroy and I have gone to the movies for the afternoon I made some of your favorite chicken tenders, just heat them up in the microwave if you get hungry for num-nums. Love you, Mom"
>fucking cunt has let my tendies get cold and mushy
>and she expects me to heat them up myself like a slave
>she will fucking learn today
>change out of my cloth diaper into a disposable one and hit the road
>spend the entire walk to the cinema filling my diapey with poo poo
>arrive at the theater parking lot and coat myself in a thin layer of pee pee and poo
>brace myself and enter the lobby
>let losse my battle cry
>RRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>"MY PRECIOUS TENDIES HAVE GONE TO WASTE, NOW MY POOPY YOU SHALL TASTE"
>pull handfuls of poop out of my diaper and fling them at random
>staff tries to stop me but I am too quick and too slippery
>entire venue is being evacuated
>navigate my way to Fantastic Beasts
>mummy and new daddy are in the front row
>covered in poo and pee, two steaming loads in each hand
>mummy's face is a mixture of shock and indescribable terror
>walk slowly towards her while chanting "...tendies...tendies...tendies..."
>our eyes are locked
>as if from far away I hear new daddy say "ayo wut tha fuck this nigga-"
>cease my low chanting with a final "TENDIEEEEES" and smash the handfuls of rancid diarrhea onto either side of her head
>bring my piss-soaked face right up to hers
>her ears are filled with my poo, eardrums are ruptured, and eyes are nearly blinded by a mixture of tears and more poo
>say very slowly and clearly
>"Don't you ever fuck with my chicky tendies again"

And the best part is the dumb whore was too scared to even take away any of my good boy points

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>>714114913

>>714114800
>That sounds like a pretty lenient doctor's office.
if it was a NEET bucks checkup - which it definitely sounds like - then that office is used to dealing with 'tards

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>be 35 year-old virgin NEET
>wake up at 6pm
>glance at my GBP board
>*gasp*
>momsey raized my Tendies by 5GBP EACH!
>Fucking makin me a bitch boy
>Go online lookin for advice
>I heard Reddit is helpfull
>Crawl through forest of NeckBeards
>Fined haven of the Gods!
>/r/Redpill
>Turns out momsey is just a whore needing an Alpha
>Must sell Beta Bux for RedPills
>Check Momsey's drawers, normie bitch has packets of Control pillz !!!
>Controll pillz will suffice
>Tear open packs swallow every last fucking Control pill
>I AM ALPHA
>I AM THE BRINGER OF DEATH
>I AM REDPILL
>Momsey walks in screaming at me, give her knowing smile, punch that bitch in her baby maker
>I AM ALPHA! I continue to shout while beating my chest like a Silverback Gorilla
>Pull out my peepee n slap momsey as she cries salty tears
>Belly is all Rumbly Tumbly, Control pills must be workin
>Start slapping Momsey showing my true dominance, I don't need no GBP I scream in her fucking normie face!!!!
>Black the Fuck out


>Wake up in hospital, stomach freshly pumped now Im hungry as fuck!
>Momsey crying in corner
>MFW nurse gives me pile of chicken tendies...
ALPHA AS FUCK!

>>714108486
kek

>>714113980
>immediately call him a kike
lol

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>Wake up at 9pm after a particularly exhausting Minecraft session
>tummy is making hungry noises
>navigate my way out of my room through the piles of weewee jugs and trash
>make my way downstairs, peek into the living room
>mummy and new daddy are doing a special backwards hug on the sofa like uncle phil showed me once
>new daddy is making funny sounds like a steam train
>don't care, hungry
>"MUMMY MAKE ME BREKKIE BREK"
>mummy screams, new daddy swears and nearly falls off the sofa like a silly
>says to mummy "why is that retard still living here, isn't he like 30"
>I don't like being called a retard
>not since the incident with the toddler in mcdonalds
>feel my inner wolf break loose
>let out a mighty howl and try to rip off my creeper hoodie
>not strong enough in my hunger-weakened state
>new daddy is laughing, I'll fucking show him
>pull down my crusty cargo shorts and grab my tingly tummy tendie
>"GOLDEN WHIRLWIND, GO GO GO"
>start spinning like a beyblade and weeing as hard as I can
>mummy is screaming and crying, new daddy swears even louder and tries to grab me
>dodge him with my veteran CS reflexes but fall because I'm dizzy from malnourishment
>new daddy gets me in a headlock and starts punching me in the tummy
>he doesn't know I've been saving a satisfying tendie-and-dew-fuelled doodie for later
>bum explodes like a fat man in fallout 3 (I don't play 4 because it doesn't have my waifu Moira)
>new daddy is covered in doodie, he looks like a swamp monster
>he lets go and starts vomiting
>mummy is on the phone, I think she's calling 911, new daddy is trying to make her put the phone down and shouting something about "the meth you dumb bitch"
>crawl to the kitchen, everything is spinning and I feel faint
>"MUMMY MAKE TENDIES" I manage to shout before blacking out
>wake up locked inside the basement bad-boy cage next to a plate of hot tendies
>new daddy is gone

great success

>>714108486
Are you human? This is scaring me man

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>Wednesday afternoon
>tugging it to Nick Jr all day long
>Finish squeezing big boy gooey gunk from my winker
>Mumsies comes home from work
>Poo poo in my diapie due to excitement
>Earned 70 good boy points earlier today by promising not to empty my piss bottles on mumsie's bed while she was at work
>Expect delicious tendies immediately
>Squat walk downstairs with full diaper of excitement
>No good smell
>Mumsie looks upset
>Anon you're 33, I talked with a friend about getting you a job
>Fucking normie mom
>Remove my shit filled diaper and wield it like a sling
>IM A GOD BOY I HAVE GOOD BOY POINTS GIVE ME CHICKEN TENDIES
>Anon please..
>IM DAVIE YOURE GOLIATH
>Swing my shit sling at her
>Diaper falls apart and flings wet sloppy big boy chocolate all over the room
>Ring of fecies whips her in the eye and she falls do the ground recoiling and grabbing her face
>Slap her open handed and squat over her face
>YOUR LACK OF TENDIES SEALS YOUR DOOM, I LOOSE MY BOWELS WITH A BOOM!
>Queue a huge wet fart bubble followed by a mexican mudslide in the rainy season
>Literally pours over her face like a generous helping of steaming hot chili
>She wipes it off her face and tries to gasp for air
>Quickly plug her shit covered mouth with my still-erect big boy weenie peenie
>GIVE ME EXTRA GOOD BOY POINTS OR ELSE ILL CHOKE YOU MUMSIE
>She spasms and mumbles what might be a yes
>waddle back to my room and play some XBox
>Serves me tendies later while sobbing and promises to give me lots of good boy points
>mfw I put that bitch in her place
>mfw I always get my way.

>>714108486
shit jug haha

So /r9k/ is leaking, good

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>>714111687

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>mumma took me to the local card store after reluctantly cashing in a gbp-coupon

>be brooding in a corner when I see a hot gril in the store, she's shopping for MTG cards!

>suddenly my third chin begins wobbling with excitement

>i waddle happily over to her, she looks stunned, obviously by my custom-ordered 7XL Metallica shirt

>i tip my fedora to her "m-m-m-m-m'l-lady" I'm shaking violently, I know 3d waifus are for normalshits, but after losing my waifu as a punishment for the incident at Legoland, a Good Boy will take whatever he gets

>"who are you..?"

>"I n-noticed you have MTG cards"

>"I'm buying them for my brother..."

>WHAT

>this FUCKING WHOREBAG has the GALL to parade her goods around MY SANCTUARY under the guise of buying MTG cards?!

>i decide to teach her a little lesson

>"play me."

>"what?"

>"there's the table. Play me."

>"I..."

>I pull out my special gray water pistol that I found under old daddy's pillow, I get whatever I want when I point it at mummy and this slut is no exception

>she obviously aquiesces and after a glorious festival of her own failures I'm sitting smugly at the other end

>I tip my fedora one more time with newfound vigor "psssh...nothin... personnel kid"

>suddenly wagechad behind the counter tells me that the cops are on their way for use of a "deadly weapon"

>ohshit.jpg

>in one fluid movement I pick up the girl and burst out the doors

>I need to stop to take a breather as soon as I make my way out and suddenly I'm being shockied! The popo peepees are here

>I begin flailing my curvaceous body on the ground on top of the girl demanding nuggies through my tears and mama jama is begging the mean police man to be lenient

>I had to spend the night in holding for the "attempted kidnapping a of a minor" but I got let out because I was "special" (damn right I am)

>mum says she's taking away my PS4 when we get home

>doesn't matter, taught a bitch a lesson, today was a good day

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>Wake up at 8 PM after my nappy-wappy
>Remembered I've been a really good boy today
>Go to check my Good Boy Point (GBP) whiteboard
>30 GBP
>Enough to go in the playroom AND get a tendie meal with ranch dipping sauce
>Wade through my piss bottles and shit jugs to get to my door
>Waddle over to mummy's room
>"Mummy! Mummy! I've been a good boy and I want to go to the pwaywoom!"
>Mummy checks my chart and leads me to the playroom
>As she unlocks the playroom, she tells me that she'll get my tendies ready
>I quickly remind her, "Don't fowget the wanch!!"
>rush into the playroom and fall over headfirst onto the racecar mat.
>begin playing with my blocks
>One hour later
>Door opens and she has my tendies, except...
>No ranch dip
>"BITCH! WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT MY TENDIES. I NEED RANCH DIPPING SAUCE TO FULLY ENJOY MY TENDIES."
>"y-you never asks for ranch, sweetums..."
>"WHY DO YOU HATE YOUR NUMBER ONE BOY!?!?"
>"WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE SUCH AN UNGRATEFUL MOM!?"
>"d-don't worry Anon, I'll go right back down to get your ranch..."
>Throw one of my blocks at her and it hits her straight in the eye
>That's gonna leave a bruise.
>"SERVES YOU RIGHT, NORMIE BITCH! NOW GO BACK DOWN AND MAKE ME SOME MORE TENDIES!"
>Lean in close to her ear
>Shout "AND DON'T FORGET THE RANCH."
>She leaves crying
>Notice I made some wawa in my nappy.
>Mum comes back and changes me while I enjoy my ranch-dipped tendies
>She's still crying
>mfw

>>714108486
kek

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>Wake up at 4PM from napsy time
>Glance over at my Good Boy Points scoreboard
>Fuck yes, 25 pointsies!
>Time to play some video gameys
>Waddle downstairs to living room in my jammy wammies
>Mom has her book club over, occupying valuable living room space
>"Anon, we're having our weekly book meeting here, can't you go play in the playroom for a little while?"
>No bitch, I saved up my Good Boy Points to play my Weegee game
>"O-okay, Anon, but please try to keep it down."
>Of course mommy, I'm your good boy!
>Load up New Super Luigi U
>Hear mom in the background: "A-as I was saying, I think Jane Eyre..."
>The game starts
>Start chanting Luigi catchphrases
>WEEGEE TIME! WAHOO! MARIOOOOO!
>Absorbed in the game
>World 1 boss, so toughy tough!
>Start farting from the concentration
>Smells like rotten meat
>WEEGEE NUMBER ONE
>Sniff fartsy farts and giggle
>Made it to world 2!
>Fart out a hot burning one
>Hear one of the bookwomen gag
>"I'm sorry Anon's Mom, I think I've left the lights on at home. I really have to go!"
>Hear her run out while gagging
>Look over at mom and her friendsies
>They're all looking at me disgusted
>Smirk
>"Come on, Anon, why don't you go to the playroom for a little bit. I think you've had enough tv timey."
>NO BITCH I WANNA PLAY WEEGEE
>I HAVE PAID THE GBP, NO REFUNDS
>"Please, Anon, we can talk about this later."
>Bitch has got to know when to stop.
>Now it's WEEGEE TIME
>Rub Wii U Gamepad over my wee wee, get a semi
>Start violently farting and shitting in my diapies
>The smell is horrific
>Women start throwing up while scrambling for the door
>Mom starts crying, completely broken down
>It's just the two of us now
>I laugh and roll around
>Mom just sits there, staring blankly at me
>Tummy tums starts growling
>Mommy, now make me tendies please?
>No response
>MOMMY, TENDIES NOW FOR TUMTUM HUNGRY
>No wonder dad left us, you useless whore
>Throw gamepad at her face, shatter her cheekbone
>She nods silently and makes my tendies
>Dine like a king

>>714120551
I had that carpeting when I was a kid!!!!

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>sitting in room
>finish plate of tendies mummy made just for me
>hmm, I want some more!
>decide to play a prank on mummy (might cost some gbp, but fun is fun)
>rig one of my pee pee bottles to pour on whoever opens my door
>position my wittle bottom towards the door as well and pull down my diaper
>bang my steel drum to get her attention (at 30 gbp I simply had to!)
>MUMMY MUMMY, I WAS HUNGRY, NOW I'M FULL SO RUB MY TUMMY!
>Hear mummy coming
>A grin grows across my face as she draws near, my eyes crinkle and a "teehee!" slips out
>Mummy enters the room
>my pee pee pours in a steady stream on her head
>At the same time I begin blasting her with my nasty poo poo, coating her in a thick baby waby green layer!
>heehee! messy mummy messy mummy I say rhymically as she is covered in my nasty
>She doesn't say a word as my prank plays out
>finish my poo, turn and sit bare bottomed on the floor, leaving a wittle poopy stain
>mummy, did you wike my joke? ga ga goo goo!
>I begin giggling and drooling while slapping my wittle feetsies together as applause
>She does say anything
>Mummy, waugh at my wittle joke!
>I can see tears running through my pee pee and poo poo on her face
>Mummy, you don't want to upset your perfect wittle boy do you?
>She is still fighting
>My eyes sharpen and I drop my voice do a gravely, gutteral tone
>Listen you normie cunt, laugh at your sons prank or I'll kill you and kill myself, I'll drag you into the bath and slit your wrists while I fuck your fat whore ass
>Punch her in the face for good measure, hard enough to leave a black eye
>Mummy sees reason and lets out a chuckle
>heehee! I think that deserves 20 gbp for being such a funny and creative prank, don't you mummy!?
>She does a sort of weird nod and walks out of my playpen
Good Boy Points is too easy to get, even when being a naughty boy! She even took me out for more tendies that day, at no cost!

>>714111087
Fuckin' 10/10, mate. Your mama got rekted.

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>>714121235
I haven't seen a thread like this year's... It brings a tear to my eye

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>>714111687

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>>714112243
Where the hell is the rest?

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>mummy planning special tender dinner date with new daddies family
>mummy promises me 15 GBP if I wear my grown up boy clothes and don't ask any questions to new daddy's family
>arrive at restaurant but getting hungy hungy, mummy tells me to wait
>start playing my 3DS XL on full volume because restaurant is noisy but getting bored
>can see new daddies family are getting hungry too so decide to go on a quest to bring us tendies
>go to the front counter but get given a big green bottle instead
>start drinking it, tastes like the old mountain dews I found in my closet
>makes me feel kinda good, start chugging it down
>mummy tells me to stop and food will be here soon, bitch thinks she can tell me what to do
>gulp down the rest and throw the bottle to the ground
>food finally arrives
>green mush and bread, smells like day old poo poos
>feel my neck heating up, hands begin to tremble
>bitch lied to me, realize I'm not getting my tendies
>flick the plate at the wall in protest just like my old new daddy taught me to with a frisbee before he left
>start feeling dizzy, seeing two of everything
>good boy clothes aren't as comfortable as red onesie with my poo poo flap
>start pulling shirt off but slip and fall onto the table
>knock big, hot soup off the table onto new daddy's family, new daddy's family begin to shriek and scream
>normies begin to crowd around our table, mummy tries to push them away from me frantically but its too late
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>throw up all over table and new family
>get escorted out of the restaurant by the mountain dew man
>mummy cries all the way home
>can't hear my fucking 3DS game properly and didn't get GBP
shitty shitty day and I woke up with a bad headache

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>it is 11pm, can hear mummys slippers timidly shuffling up the stairs to tell me its time for beddy-bie
>i am dressed in mummys bra and panties that I stole from her drawer while she was out getting tendies for din din
>am peacefully writing love letter to my imaginary waifu
>hear timid knock on my door
>"h-honey, its lights out time. open your door so i can give you your night-light"
>dumb fucking bitch doesn't understand that i go to bed whenever i want. i dont need whores like mummy telling me what to do
>yell from other side of door, "TENDIES FIRST"
>"n-no baby boy, you don't want to upset your stomach and make poo-poo again do you?"
>feel rage seething throughout my plump, pink body
>roll out of bed and start pounding floor
>TENDIES TENDIES TENDIES
>o-okay honey, but then you have to g-go night night. your mummy has to be up bright and early tomorrow for work
>i win, she goes back down to heat up my leftover tendies. listen to her cry while starting microwave
>pee-pee starts to get stiff
>she comes back upstairs and i open door, she has FUCKING 3 tendies on a plate and FORGOT MY FUCKING SIPPY CUP WITH APPLE JUICE
>"h-honey, why are you in mummys undies? i t-told you not to go in my room while i'm done"
>i began to shake violently
>hit plate of tendies out of her hand
>she begins sobbing
>pick tendie up off the floor
>point it at her, tell her to lay down and open her mouth, and teary eyed, she obeys
>violently face fuck her with tendie, jamming it down her throat until spit bubbles out of her mouth and she begins vomiting
>stomp on her meany face
>"next time, you make me 50 fresh tendies when i ask, bitch"
>she gets up, picks up tendies, and goes downstairs to cry
>i continue to write my letter. that'll teach her

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>>714113305

You're all strange sad little men

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>Wake up early its 4pm
>Dont smell tendies in the air.
>I waddle to my door around the piss bottles.
>Start slamming my head into the wall and screaming TENDIES TENDIES I WANT TENDIES
>Slut bitch Mommy slowly opens the door to my lair
>With tears in her eyes she slides in my tendies and juice-box.
>I tell her iCarly is on later so she better prepare the highest luxary goodboypoints can buy
>I make my way back to my bed exhausted from my journey across the room and back i rest
>my diaper seems almost full ill need a change before the big event later
>pondering what is going to happen in tonights episode i drift into slumber my little pony playing in the background
>I am awoken to mommy cleaning my piss jars up i tell her i need a diaper change aswell she nods with a look of disgust on her face
>Soon iCarly will be on the grand event
>The theme songs starts playing i scream at mommy to hurry or ill murder her and feed her to our dog buttersnout
>Mommy enters my room she is dressed in appropriate apperal plaid shorts converss sneekers and a hoodie her hair dyed the perfect shade of blonde.
>Now my Good boy favorite boy reward rivaled only by tendies and juice boxes begins
>I wait for a scene with sam in it my favorite iCarly character she is the best i then have mommy do her special service to me and pretend its sam
>i came five times tonight it was the best i finish by blowing on sams i mean mommy butt and tell that dirty slut to go make me SOME FUCKING TENDIES
>she starts walking away when a sight i never witnessed before appears before my eyes SAM IN A BIKINI JUST SHOWED ON AIR OMG
>With a speed of achilles i move like a lion and grab mommy before she makes it out of my lair
>I throw her on my computer desk and did adult things too her more then i ever thought i could
>when im finally finished mommy isnt moving
>iCarly is over i lay down and start watching adventure time
>covered in my special sauce mommy starts crying
>i tell her GO GET ME FUCKING TENDIES

>>714108486
>"what's a normie?"
>totally onboard with 'mortem omnibus'

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>3 PM
>wake up after all-nite playstation marathon
>feel the morning hungies
>expect my morning tendies left out by mummy before her wageslave time
>waddle my way into the kitchen
>no tendies
>mummy forgot my tendies
>anger fills my gelatinous body
>angry poopies overcome me and i poopsie on the floor
>smear poopsie all over floor and roll around in it
>lay there for a while
>the smell of hot, churned tendies-poopie fills the air
>wageslave mom returns home at 5 PM
>i tackle her and scream "BIG BOY HUNGIE FOR TENDIES"
>she screams out "ANON, WHAT HAPPENED?!"
>"MUMMY DIDN'T LEAVE MORNING TENDIES BIG BOY HUNGIE"
>she tries to reason with me as my shell of poopie cracks off covering her in dried poopies
>"A-anon, I'm so sorry. I actually took the day of today to go on a d-date. There was a guy at the office, and..."
>"MUMMSIE WUMSIE IS MINE ME NEED TENDIES"
>angry poopsies water dribbles through my undie wundies
>"MUMMY MINE"
>poopie doopie makes my undies droopie until a hole bursts open releasing my tendies goop all over mummy
>mummy begins to cry and vomit
>i cover myself in poopsie and begin screeching
>mummy is covered in my liquid-poopsie, crying
>i smack her in the face with poopie covered man milkies
>mummy keeps and says "You're such a good, big boy, anon. I'll get you tendies now, a-and I won't go out on any more dates."
>victory waddle back to beanbag chair and celebrate with more playstation
>later mummy serves me double tendie-dindin
>mfw

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>>714108486
fucking amazing

>>714109081
>>714110280
>>714110482
You're joking, right guys?

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Hope this thread doesnt die

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>up at 3:AM because hard core gamer
>playing tf2
>looking at pony spray when suddenly I get killed by demonigger
>rage and nearly shit myself
>tummy rumbles
>rub my fap lotion on my belly and slide to the kitchen
>look in freezer for hot pockets
>none left
>tip toe to mommys room
>she tried to lock her door but I pick it with my handy screwdriver that I keep in my cloth diaper
>silently open door, get on the floor and do a tactical lizard crawl to her bedside
>m-mummy I shake her
>"yes, sweetie"
>your good boy needs more hot pockies
>"no anon I have-"
>squeezes her boob and punch her in the nose
>she doesn't say anything, she gets up and leaves to Walmart
>go back to computer and fap on e621 to furry hentai
>she comes back leaves the hot pockets on the counter and goes back to bed
>I grab the box
>fucking ham and cheese
>thought I told that bitch pepperoni
>go to her room again
>door locked yet again
>this infuriates me
>with all my force I break open the door
>THE DOOR! THE DOOR! YOU TRIED TO LOCK IT, YOU TRIED TO POISEN ME WITH THE WRONG HOT POCKETS!!!!
>nail her in the eye with frozen hot pocket box
>same routine, made her go back to Walmart to buy the right hot pockets
>mfw she brought back two boxes
>mfw she even brought back Baja blast from Taco Bell just to be sure I was sated

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>Be masturbating to family photos of my mom when she was in middle school
>Mommy comes in and sees
>Asks me to stop
>Stand up, still masturbating (Slowly, dont want to cum yet, but dont wanna have to start over)
>Explain that incest was just invented by normies to make it harder for robots to get laid, and that only a fucking freak wouldn't be attracted to viable pussy when available
>She sighs and leaves
>finally able to finish up, want some spaghetti
>Go downstairs and see mommy in kitchen
>Cooking roast chicken
>Screech at her and ask why she didn't make spaghetti
>Her answer is the final straw
>"What? You didn't ask for spaghetti."
>Lunge at her and kick the shit out of her
>Shit on her whore face when she's down
>As she lays there, her pants ride up quite a lot
>See her ass clearly through her pants
>Mutter "Only a freak wouldn't be attracted to viable... viable pussy..."
>Don't want to lose virginity yet (saving for my highschool friend who I haven't spoken to in 17 years, still holding out hope we'll meet again and she'll have stayed pure for me too)
>Jerk off onto her ass instead, write a note on the white wall of the kitchen in my own shit
>"Spaghetti. One hour. Or next time, I'll do it worse, then kill myself and blame you in the suicide note."

>>714108486
I hate normies. they always overreact to everything.

I hope you're doing okay, anon.

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>>714124644

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>Be me
>Living with mommy and asshole stepdada
>Usually keep to myself down in the basement with my animes, and vidya while they screw around upstairs
>That fucking chimp thinks I cant hear him bang my mom in this house of paperthin walls
>One day he's doing laundry
>Motherfucker thinks he can put his undies in the same basket as mine and wash them together
>ThisFuckingNigger.jpg
>Tell him that's a big nono and tell mommy on him
>She has to listen to me, I've earned many GBP last week for calling a truce and not chucking my doodoo in the Tyrones aquarium
>That fucking junglebunny had the audacity to tell me to grow up and stop making my moms life a living hell and move out and get a job
>A job
>A FUCKING JOB
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>run to my batcave and take out my glorious 3rd Reich armband
>Eat this subby
>Parade around the house screaming Sieg Heil and Heil Hitler
>Notice my neighbours watching
>My middle schools bff dad, I heard he moved out and married a fitnessjock in SF
>Anyway
>Tyrone chimps out
>OOO OOO AAA AAA
>Comes at me full speed
>OHSHIT.gif
>Start spinning my arms in a forward direction
>Actually sock him in big fat apenose
>"MUTHAFUCKA WHITEBOI" "That's it Martha! I'm out!"
>Notice moms in the corridor crying like a little bitch and smoking ciggs
>Tyrone runs upstairs and starts packing his suitcase
>Run to mom and put my face a few inches from hers
>"Start vaping bitch"
>Run to Tyrones aquarium and lays the big poopie that was laying in my underino all this time
>That'll teach that slave
>Tyrone comes downstairs and goes out the front door
>Mom runs after him
>Tyrone pls dont! He's just a boy!
>"HE'S 32, FFS MARTHA!"
>kek, like age has anything to do with that
>Moms still screaming behind him and he stops, he looks like he's coming around
>NotOnMyWatchCoon.jpg
>run out and stand between him an mommy
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>"NO! FUCK THIS"
>Steals neighbours car and drives off
>Mommy realizes I'm the only man for her
>Mommy's good boy wins again

>>714125188
>>Actually sock him in big fat apenose
Aw, thats not cool.

>>714112243
Please continue, anon.

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>be at Burger King
>they have $1.49 for 10 nuggets deal
>this means I can order more nuggies!
>time to load up
>decide to get 200
>make ma-ma do the conversion from USD to GBP
>only 60 Good Boy Points for 200 nugnugs!
>I clean out their nuggie saucies (costs 0 GBP so I order extra, 1 sauce packet per 2 nuggies)
>my table looks like the famous Scarface scene but with nuggies instead of cocaine
>scarf down my nuggers n' sauce while ma-ma plays Candy Crush on her phone (shitty pleb game)
>mum tells me to slow down else I get a tum-tum ache
>stupid bitch thinks she can tell me what to do
>later that night I wake up with a big hurty poo
>rush-waddle to bathroom
>trip and fall before I reach toilet
>laying on the bathroom floor crying my eyes out and pooping all over the floor
>1 hour later i clean myself up in the toilet bowl and wake up mommy to clean my poopies
>didn't get my 50 GBP for sleeping through the night
>lose the 30 daily GBP bonus I get for keeping my poo-poos in the toilet
>can't go to sleep now
>do peepee fun rubby-squirty on the Baby Bop pages of my Barney and Friends picture book
>miss the pages and and get pee-pee mayonnaise all over my bedsheets
>mums get upset when she sees the stains and takes away the rest of my GBP
And that's why you never choose nuggies over tendies

>>714108486
thank you for this thread

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>be me
>27
>live at home with mom
>she has a party and invites our friends and families
>big pot luck but all I want is chicken tendies
>go to freezer pull out tendies
>throw some in the microwave
>come out of the kitchen with my chicken tendies and mustard
>everyone looks at me as I go back to my fap fortress
>mom comes in and tells me, "Anon, will you please be social for our family and friends? Please do it for me!"
>Go back to the living room
>"so anon I hear you like those chinese cartoons like the dragon ballsy and naroootoe?"
>starting to get pissed
>giggle and just say yeah
>then some faggot pulls out a Macbook Air to show off his faggot families vacation
>rage ensues
>run to my room screaming "REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>grab piss bottle
>throw it at macfag
>hits him everyone goes silent
>Then I scream "Filthy fucking casual!"
>Apple is for fags
>mom grabs me
>Back hand her
>faggot white knight steps in and tells me to calm down
>start to scream and helicopter
>shit my self in the process
>everyone pulls out their iPhones to take a video
>more rage
>run back into room and grab my wooden katana
>here them talking and asking what they should do
>run out and chop at the macbook asshole
>the guy tries to tackle me but my ninjitsu skills are second to none
>he trips and bust his head open on the coffee table
>everyone runs out
>someone calls the cops
>go hid in my room
>clutch my Tifa Lockhart body-pillow and pray to my framed picture of Gabe Newell above my bed
>set up trap using my jizz bottles
>cops knock on door and tell me to open up
>They bust in
>first cop gets a bucket of jizz I proped over my door
>second one trips over my fleshlight
>cops throw me to the ground and hand cuff me
>mom's crying
>go to jail
>missing warm tendies and comfy animes

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>>714126199

>>714108486
Good read, keked.

>>714122321
Newfag detected.

I think i read this somewhere

>>714126650
Only newfags call people newfags..

......newfag.

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>Wake up this tuesday morning feeling good
>Pull the special edition Battlestar Galactica blanket off my bed
>Tie it around my neck like cape
>Step over my piss bottles and old food containers
>It's an autistic ballet as I tip toe to the spots on my floor that aren't covered in garbage
>Finally make it out into hallway
>Rush to look at Good Boy chart on the wall
>MFW only 10 more points needed for a Double Tendie Dinner!
>Run downstairs so fast my cape floats behind me
>Do a running slide onto kitchen floor to tell Mummy the good news
>Mummy just looks at me sternly
>Says to bend over so she can check my diaper first
>"You know I have to check every morning, anon."
>"Nooooo! I don't wanna!" I yell defiantly
>Tears start to well in her eyes
>She starts walking away from me
>"Wait...Ok..." I say as I lean over the table for her inspection
>Pull down my pants
>The smell of partially digested tendy shit and cheese diarrhea wafts to her nose
>She instantly vomits into the sink
>"That's minus 50 GBP!" she screams with her chin covered in puke
>I screech and rip off my diaper
>Throw it onto the dining room table as hard as I can
>Orange and brown chunks splatter everywhere
>Some gets on the ceiling
>Some gets on mummy
>She curls into a ball sobbing uncontrollably next to the sink
>Reaches up for a towel but accidentally cuts herself on a kitchen knife I left out
>She's bleeding and covered in vomit and poo while screaming how I'm a bad boy
>Quickly put on my shoes and stuff my pockets with frozen tendies
>Run to my car crying because now I'm late for class at community college

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>Tell mommy to make me triple-tendie din dins since I have so many good boy points
>She tells me we're out of Tyson brand tendies
>Unacceptable
>REEEEEEEEEEE MUMY MUMMY I TOLD YOU YO BUY MORE TENDIES REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>"Okay Anon, I'm s-sorry"
>"WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME MUMMY REEEEEEEEEEEE"
>Start flailing around, banging my head on the wall and kicking my legs around
>Stop when she says we can go to Mcdonald's
>Waddle in the store, drooling
>Ask for 5 Chicken sandwhiches and 5 SUPER SIZE fries and a Large Coke and a Good Boy sized McFlurry with extra toppings
>Wagie says "We stopped selling super size freedom fries after 9/11"
>Start screaming and farting
>Manager tells mommy that we have to leave
>Start screaming even louder and throwing other peoples food everywhere
>Hop on one of the tables and take a massive poopie
>Walk out laughing like my hero Tidus from Final Fantasy X
>Mommie is kneeling on the sidewalk, crying asking how it could get this bad

>>714109081
>>714110280
>>714110482

Please tell me this is bait.

>>714116008
kek ending

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>11pm, i'm in bed
>wake up with a hankering for tendies
>sneak downstairs even though it's past my bedtime
>see mummy and new daddy watching something on Cinemax
>be extra sneaky as i go past to the kitchen
>pull big box of tendies from freezer
>ham-handedly drop it and it makes a loud *THUNK*
>mummy hears it and thinks I'm a burglar
>new daddy rushes out of the room to investigate
>he runs into the kitchen and i shit and piss everywhere in fear
>he gets angry and starts yelling at mummy
>'why the fuck do we have to live with this fucking autistic creep! he's an adult for fuck's sake!'
>things get heated and he hits mummy
>big mistake
>pick up a fistfull of the shit and throw it in new daddy's face
>quickly jump on him, throw him to the ground, then sit on his face with my ample 340lb frame
>sit there for a while, new daddy stops moving
>command mummy to make me tendies
>she does
>now new daddy needs a special chair he controls with his mouth to get around
>he grimaces every time i walk past
>mummy makes me tendies every day, no quibbles

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Baby wakes up in the morning hungry for his tendie meal
He starts shouting for his mummy, and so loudly it's unreal
"Wanna eat my chickie tendies, so please give them to me now,
And don't forget to bring the ranch, you fat, ungrateful cow"
Mummy comes in with a smile on her face
"Just a second hun", sounds like she knows her place
After just a minute comes my favorite food in bed
And I sit there eating chicken, happy baby has been fed

Mummy comes back later for my dirty dish and plate
And now I need more tendies to properly satiate
So I throw the plate at mummy and I tell her what I need
But I threw the plate so hard at her that she began to bleed
Mummy took my good boy points away
And she told me that I will be grounded for today
This is an injustice for the good boys everywhere
Time to release plan B inside of my underwear

I sit in my bed and then I have to concentrate
And release manifestation of my overwhelming hate
And when all is said and done,that is when I begin to bawl
Mummy comes back in, because she's at my beck and call
I watch her face when she smells the smell
"This is it dear mummy, this is my personal hell"
"Baby made a poo poo and needs mummy to change"
"Don't forget my good boy points, cuz I yelled out your name"

The morally of the story is that baby's always right
Gotta put mummy in place when she puts up a fight
She will try to ground you, but try as she might
When she messes with baby there is no end in sight
Cherry Coke Zero is such a joy
To go with chickie tendies for mummy's little boy
And in the morning we will do this all again
That's why daddy left us, because his is not our friend

Somebody screen shot-save these kek stories.

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>am now filthy NEET, its almost normie tier
>filthy whore mother informed me NEETBUX can be exchanged for GBP
>I do like GBP
>have her leave work to pick me up
>roll me to car to take me to NEETBUX vendor
>disgusting nazi at bum office asks if ive looked for a job yet
>fucking normie shmuck dares speak to me?
>start breathing in through my teeth and blowing out my nose
>snot starts running down
>starts getting sucked into my mouth
>wait till mouth is filled
>grab wagecuck social benefit bearocrat by his ugly tie and and scream PUSSY spitting my snot all over his face
>stand up flipping the desk with my belly
>guess mother dearest was tired as 5 security guards carried me to the car

>mfw I dont have to go to bum office anymore
>NEETBUX4LIFE

>>714108486
>>714108486

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>be mummy's good boy
>at 12:30 my tumtum always grumble
>mother brings fresh tendies every night
>yesterday it was 12:31 and I didn't receive any tendies
>MOMMMMYYYYY WHERE ARE MY TENNDIIIIIIESSS! RRRRRREEEEEEEEEE!
>she used to respond to my call but this time no answer
>I got up from my chair lifting 350lbs worth of love
>the chair was full of sweat stains where fungi grew
>I waddle all the way up to mommy's room
>when I open the door, I found her with her bf cuddling in the bed watching netflix
>"Anon, knock on the door bef-"
>"TUMTUM IS EMPTY WHERE NEEED TENDIES NOOOOOW"
>"But Dear, it is past 12:40 now and-"
>"RRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>I drop my pants, the stench alone made mommy's bf pass out under the blanket
>I put my ass over the wall and start drawing Australia map using the fresh-turtling shit from my anus
>"oh! Anon! What are you doing?!"
>I SWEAR TOGOD I WILL DRAW TE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD MAP IF YOU DONT BRING ME TENDIES NOW"
>"Anon! But Terry is here and-"
>"I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL EVEN DRAW THE FUCKING ISLAND IN FULL DETAIL. I HAVE ENOUGH SHIT TO MAP THE WHOLE SOLAR SYSTEM!
>while I started moving towards India map I scream "POO POO OR TEEEENNNNDIIIIIIES RRRREEEEEERRRREEEEEEEE!!!"
>mommy finally got her car keys and went out to the nearest Mc.Donalds while crying

>her bf disappeared
>she brought the tendies to my room "thank you mommy anon is a good boy right?"
>y-yes anon...you are mommy's good boy" she said while sobbing
She is lucky that I only drew all the way up to Nepal map the fucking bitch.

>>714127003
>>714124028
You're both faggots if you believe them.

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>>714128002

>>714122321
How's Dorn doin'?

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>playing some call of dooties tree
>my belly starts to rumble
>"Mommy I need some Tendieeeeeessss."
>"Anon, for the last time, you're on a diet and can't have fried food!"
>"But momeeeeeee! I have enough GBPeeeee!!"
>no response
>wait a few minutes
>Hear the "bump bump" of mommy walking down the stairs
>a tray slides through my flap-flap on my basement door
>mommy had it installed because "she couldn't bear seeing me"
>remove the neck of my poop jug from my anus
>been sitting on my poop jug as a chair all day
>it makes my peepee feel tingly
>wobble over my bedroom door
>look at the tray
>so taken aback by the horror on my tray that I fall over
>THE BITCH MADE ME BAKED CHICKEN
>clench fists hulk-style and start yelling "IM.... ANGRY"
>"ANON SMASH!"
>just like my hero, saitama, knock the basement door off of it's hinges in one punch
>start hobbling up the stairs
>have to stop on the 5th step because exhausted
>take a nap on the stairs for about 30 minutes
>continue making my journey up the last 3 steps
>get to the top, reminds me of rocky
>roll up to mommy, poopy butt leaving trails on the carpet
>"hello anon how was your dinn-"
>roll straight into her legs, knocking her to the ground
>"MOMMY FAILED TO COMPLY, NOW SHE ten-DIES"
>Start rolling on her like a steamroller
>hear her bones cracking from my beautiful curves
>"ANON NO PLEASE STOP!"
>activate "Muddy Lemonade" protocol
>start pissing and shitting as i roll over her
>"ANON ILL MAKE YOU TENDIES JUST PLEASE STOP!"
>I halt
>she crawls to the kitchen her broken legs dragging behind her
>see her pull a handful of what i think are tic-tacs from an orange bottle and put them into the milk for the breading
>I hate mint flavor!
>slither up behind her like a snake that has just eaten a elephant whole
>"PUT MINTS IN MY TENDIES, YOUR SPINE GOES BENDY"
>get mommy's head and bend it backwards so the back touches her butt
>she's limp
>have peepee fun friction time with her mouth
>roll back to basement and start playing CS:GO

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>Up in the wee hours of Thursday morning
>been masturbating to Sailor Moon Crystal
>finish up and get the munchies
>Wake up mom at 3am
>Tell her i'm hungry for chicken mcnuggets and to go buy some now
>Says she has wake up early for work tomorrow (dumbass that's today) and she'll pick some up on the way home
>Fuck that
>Place subwoofer speakers against the wall facing parents room and blast https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPRF1gXh5VY
>She knocks my room door for 5 minutes meekly asking me to turn it off but I kick back and scream CHICKEN MCNUGGETS every time
>Finally she stops and gets in her car and comes back 40 minutes later with my mcnuggets
>Double 50 piece with extra dipping sauce plus an M&M McFlurry to wash it down with
>Furiously gobble the entire thing in four minutes
>Crash for 12-hours
>Wake up just intime to see mum home from work
>She's exhausted as hell but brought me the same order without asking just to make sure I don't wake her again
>I do anyway

Kek fucking normalfags

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>4 am, right in the middle of my 5 nights at freddy's session
>suddenly my pee pee feels funny and tickles from the inside
>"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMYYYYYYY"
>she doesn't respond, she's been eating a lot of sleep-candies since when second daddi left to buy tendies (she promised she'll share with me soon enough yay! )
>i'm forced to waddle out of my 80 GBP gaming chair and go in her room while screaming "PEEEEEE PPEEEEEEEEEEEE FIZZY MUMMY HELP BABYYY GUU"
>the stress of this causes my belly to relax and I let out a steaming brown tendy-log in my XXL diapey - i'm mummys big boy, she always says that :)
>i plot down in her bed while she looks at me in horror and disgust
>"mummy my pee pee feels tickly, need pee pee funny dance"
> tears are falling on her cheeks, she closes her eyes and starts taking my diaper off
>the smell of fresh tendy-log and 2 days old diarrhea smeared on my hairy asscheeks makes her gag
> i let out a teehee while saying "mummy belly burp!"
>then, while sobbing, she grabs my pee pee stick and starts going up and down
>my smegma crusted foreskin hardly retreats while tear drops fall on my belly
>i let out my funny-happy milk on her hand "OOHUUHHHHHHU PEE PEE IS GLAD, I MADE IT FOR MUMMYY"
> "you're my special little baby boy, thank you for your gift to mommy" says her, while becoming red in face from happiness
>mummy grabs orange bottle from nightstand and rewards herself extra-helping of sleep candies, hehee she deserves it!
> i leave her room and the diaper on her bed and go back to my gaming session
> the next day she's still tired and sleeping on her bed
i wonder when she'll wake up, maybe she's preparing a surprise for babby boy gu? so many GBP & tendies await me for not waking her up!!

>>714128549
Someone actually did it--thanks anon.

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>Settling down in my man-palace after a hard night of teaching scammers a lesson in Runescape.
>It's been a bit hot lately, so the Coke shit-jugs are starting to ferment. I can see gas-bubbles forming, and the bottles are expanding. Mommy's been getting lazy. I resolve to have a stern word with her.
>Feeling a bit peckish. I'm still only on my second dinner, after all.
>Check my GBP chart and see that I have 25 good boy points saved up! That's only 5 short of a whole box of tendies!
>"MOMMY! MOM! YOUR BEST-BOY NEEDS YOU!"
>I hear a glass smash, and a sob from outside my door. Obviously, in her rush to tend to me, the wench has dropped whatever beverage she was preparing for me. I scream louder.
>"MOMMY!! GET IN HERE NOW!". I start throwing piss bottles at the wall. One goes my window, and into the neighbour's house. I don't care. Mommy will fix it.
>All this exertion wears me out, no strength left. Lose control of my sphincter temporarily and blast shit all down the back of my limited edition Final Fantasy jammies.
>Mommy comes in and looks around the room, her face is all scrunched up, clearly distressed at how much she has displeased me.
>"I want tendies! Now!" I point in the direction of the kitchen, and expect to see her much dutifully away to prepare my nourishing reward.
>Mommy sighs and looks at the chart "Anon, you know the rules. You still need 5 more GBP for a box of chicken tenders."
>"They're called TENDIES you stupid BITCH!" I scream as I lunge towards her. I go to fetch my little league bat so I can bash her head in, but the fates cause me to miss by a TINY bit.
>"Sigh, clean up all these bottles, Anon, and I'll give you the last 5 points."
>Before I deliver the fatal blow, she walks out, and closes the door.
>In a weakened state, unable to continue the fight. I decide to clean up the jugs.
>Go to collect them all, too many for one trip. I refuse to take multiple trips, it's undignified, so I pile them all on my blanket and wrap them up.
(continued)

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>>714130671
>Shit and piss jugs leaking everywhere. No bottletops on any of the MTN Dew bottles (I keep all bottlecaps in my Fallout Limited Edition Vault while their value increases!)
>Put the poopy-pile in the secret area under my bed! :^)
>"MOMMY MOMMY. TENDIE TIME! A WHOLE PACK OF TENDIES WILL SOON BE MINE!"
>Another glass shatters outside the door. How stupid IS this woman? I hear another, louder sob.
>Mommy comes in, a bullet rolls in past her foot. Maybe she was buying me that new pistol I wanted! (I'm prestige in CoD)
>She looks around, checking for poopy-bottles and pissy-wissy jugs. She doesn't know our little secret! :^)
>Tendies already on a plate! She's semi-redeemed herself!
>Ready for my reward!
>"Sorry, Anon. I still see one bottle." Mom points, and holds the plate out of reach. I see one piss-bottle I've missed! Blast!
>"N-No mom! That's MTN Dew", noting the clearish yellow liquid.
>"Oh really? Then drink some." She says.
>Horrified at the idea, but really need those GBP! Still too exhausted from talking, and the shit is starting to pool around my feet.
>I walk over and pick up the bottle. Looking down in disgust, but trying to hide it, I take a swig.
>Immediately feel the overpowering urge to throw up. Try to keep it down, but can't. Still too tired from the battle with mom earlier.
>Start throwing up all over my room. Lurch forward and trip over my Pinkie Pie plushie.
>Vomit hits my mom in the eyes and she starts screaming and vomiting too. The tendies go flying in the air, and mom smashes into everything.
>Fall back onto the bed and the shit jugs burst out from underneath. Shit and piss everywhere.
>Mom slips over in the shit, unable to stand up. Eventually she crawls out. Crying. Probably in disgust at how lazy she is.
>Tendies land on the floor in a pool of liquid shit and piss.
>Not wasting 30GBP after all that.
>Sit down for my meal.
>as I work down the shit&piss covered tendies I hear one last, sad sob and then a loud BOOM
>MFW.

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'Twas the night before chadmas,
All the normies were clubbing,
"MUMSY WUMSY" I cried,
"MY TUMMY NEEDS RUBBING",
Mommy obliged and gave it her all,
Then shit from my bum flowed clean through the hall.
With shit up her arm and all down her blouse,
I smiled with charm and ran all through the house.
I left a trail of poo poo, screaming 'bout chicken tenders,
"I WANT TENDIES TO CHEW, IN THEIR GOLDEN FRIED SPLENDOR!"
Mommy told me to stop, she forbade me to shout,
I nearly lost hope till my katana came out.
With a gleam in my eye, I spoke my foul words,
Threatened Mommy with death by sheath or by turd.
She complied with my wishes and I finally scored;
A plate full of tendies that she knew I adored.
Now I know there are many who detest and abhor me,
But a NEET cares not for the chad or the normie.

>>714118188
The fact that your post ends with 88 is even funnier.

If you don't get the reference, google 88 Heil.

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>lay in bed all day playing PS3
>tummy starts to grumble
>realize I haven't eaten in two hours
>too fat and lazy to get out of bed
>raise my massive grease coated arm (150 lbs alone) as a half devoured tendie escapes the endless rolls of flesh on my side
>bang on wall 3 times to summon mommy
>mommy walks in, looking annoyed and tired
>"its 11pm anon what do you want?"
>open mouth to let out all of the revolting gases that have amassed in my guts after months of digesting tendies.
>mommy turns away from me and holds her mouth, vomiting in her hand.
>MAKE ME TENDIES NOW REEEEEEEEEE!
>mommy bursts into tears and runs downstairs, remembering what I did to her the last time she didn't make tendies for her good boy
>a few minutes later mommy comes upstairs with a fresh batch of tendies
>feels good man
>mom slowly approached the bed and apprehensively reaches out plate
>"h-here are y-your tendies anon, y-youre a good boy"
>swipe the plate away from her
>open mouth again to reveal all my yellow, decaying teeth, harboring all forms of bacteria and fungi.
>mommy vomits all over me!
>vomit is absorbed by the tides of fat that seem to endlessly fold all over my sickening excuse of a body
>causes a displacement of matter inside the rolls, making age-old tendies float to the top of the vomit-sea inside each roll of fat
>wipe off mold that has grown on the old tendies and throw them on the plate
>mfw I have more tendies
>mfw mommy called me a good boy

Feels
Fucking
Good
Man

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>be me
>23 yo
>watching gay porn on my computer
>furiously stroking my 4 inches dick
>mom comes in
>"anon, is that gay porn?"
>"n-no"
>she takes a rolled up newspaper and starts to hit me with hit
>"you know the lord doesn't like when you watch that kind of thing!"
>"please mommy stop" i'm crying
>"on your back, now!" i can't but obey
>she slaps my penis
>i'm begging her
>"now if I see you watching gay porn again, it's 2 months in chastity cage!"
>ohno.jpg, the chastity cage is always painfull
>she removes all my current GBP, and I can't have tendies for all week.
>also she won't change my diaper

mfw lying in bed in a soiled diaper without tendies.

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The following is completely true. Unlike the rest of you idiots I actually live the dream!

>29 years old
>In my play room
>Need to make poo
>Lean over my inflatable ottoman
>Put my toy dump truck between my legs and make a shipment.
>Poo-poo is a little runnier than usual, but it doesn't matter.
>Now I'm hauling a fresh load across the country
>Mummy brings in my lunch (nachos. I like to change it up)
>"Anon, I told you not to play with your poo poo!"
>I'm getting real fucking tired of hearing this.
>Flip the plate of nachos into the wall
>Start punching my own head
>"Anon stop PLEASE STOP!" she screams
>You made me do this I say.
>She runs out of the room to get the tethers to tie my arms back and stop me hitting myself
>Stand behind the door and wait for her to come back.
>As soon as she runs back in I punch her directly in the face as hard as I can, making a weird, wet cracking sound.
>She falls over and hits her head on my dinosaur table.
>I go back to playing with my toy trucks and stuffed animals
>She wakes up a bit later
>I don't say anything, I just stare at her
>She quietly leaves the room, rubbing her fresh bruise
>I can hear her crying from her room.
>Am I worried? No. Regretful? Certainly not.
>I'll wait it out and things will go back to normal.
>It's easy for me to be a good boy.
>If Mummy does what I say I'll be a good little boy.

If she doesn't like it she should have had an abortion. She chose this life.

>>714111087
What good would shitting in the toilet tank have done?

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>be me
> 28 years old NEET
> raised as an only child
> I caused mummy and daddys divorce
> nothing matters except the scrumptious taste of tendies
> mfw its 03:00am
> eww mummy is sleeping with nasty landlord
> mummy I'm hungries
> yell into intercom for snackitysnacks
> CLAIM THE MEAL OF THE CHICKEN GODS!! ITS TENDY TIME!!
> her tired voice reponds with "NOT NOW SWEETY MOMMY IS WORKING!!"
> insolent woman I know there are tendies in the freezer bring me my tendies
> challenging me at this hour?
> keep chanting for the tendies that are rightfully mine
> GOLDEN BROWN TENDY TOWN TURN THAT FROWN UPSIDE DOWN
> evil jew landlord tells mummy to shut me up
> naughty man. Making mummy's ladylettuce smell like sardines
> The war has begun.ctn
> enter sunrise. All Preparations are complete.
> nullifying any chance of escape I reeeee into mummies "office" on my valiant reinforced electric scooter.
> douse jew in two jugs of poopyjuice before he can activate his spells
> evil jew is unable to battle!
> ram him into the corner and then leap off of my valiant steed and mount mummy's face
> NO NO NO NO NO NO MUMMY! YOUR PUNISHMENT MUST BE MORE SEVERE!!
> "URGH! YOU'RE CRUSHING ME SWEET-- OH GOD HELP ME PLEASE NO!!"
> Groan as I release a big boy turd so nasty her fingernails begin to peel backwards
> gaze into her eyes as the impact sends mummy into panic attack
> expel the last of my poopies on the sheet. How many times must I break you?
> tidy up my toys and waddle into kitchen to await my spoils
> slithery jew slithers out of my castle and says we don't need to worry about rent ever again
> mummy finally arrives visibly shaken and broken inside
> opens the freezer to make my tendies and blows them until they are cool
> "mummy you have to chew them for me"
> mummy breaks down in tears and screams for death
> yawn, give myself 5 extra gbp and fall asleep without eating them.

>>714123786
>victory waddle back to beanbag chair
Eugh, I really hope you took a shower first.

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> Be healthy 300 pound baby with a loving mommy
> wake up right on time at 5:25pm after a night of intense gaming on garys mod
> Go out with mummy to buy the minecraft sword I was promised, to defend against normies
> Arrive at Gamestop, mom makes GBP transaction with the wagey behind the coutner
> Feel instant rush of anger when I finally get the sword, because I need to show I'm superior to dumb wagecucks
> I hit the wagey with it, as hard as my big boned muscles will allow me to
> "Anon! WHY!?"
> "DUMB WAGESLAVE MADE ME CAVE! LET ME GIVE HIM A BOO BOO OR I DO A POO POO!" I wittily reply
> "ANON! 200GBP GONE MISTER"
> This dumb bitch thinks she can get away with this, I warned her
> "REEEEEEE" I scream, as I pull down the shelves in the store to block off mommy
> Rip down my diaper, the stench immediately causes the two other customers in the store to vomit
> Put my brand new awesome sword between my bum bum cheeks, pointing it behind me
> Start fiercely grinding on the sword, the mere sight causes all the normies in the store to get shocked from amazement
> Can feel the individual pixel changing as I do move it
> Sword is now covered in my healthy, thick blood
> Pee on the sword for good measure
> I am now the master of all the elements, blood, pee pee and poo poo
> "GIVE ME TENDIES NOW MUM"
> Start hitting everyone in the store with the amalgamated weapon
> Everyone flees
> Start rolling around in the aftermath
> Pass out, because I was hungry
> Wake up in bed with tendies, mommy happily swinging on a rope by her neck
> Decisive victory

>>714132978
Wow
The End

https://vid.me/UyR9

Guy gets maggots removed from penis.

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>>714111687
Top fucking kek

>>714132978
I came

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>be me
>got enough good boy points for dark souls 2
>had it marked on a calendar when i would get it
>it finally arrives, of course mummy brought it up to me once it was dropped off
>tear paper bag open with yellowed rotten teeth
>get the game out and insert it into xbox
>its too big, MUMMY
>hear her running upstairs, shes had enough beatings to know to come as quickly as she can
>i hear her trip and start to sob
>laugh, shout at her to hurry up
>MUMMY WHY THE FUCK IS THE GAME NOT GOING IN
>honey you have to open the box to get the di-
>rail her in the head with my hammy fist
>she hits the floor with a thud
>opens the box now being educated
>insert disc
>error-60-00-08
>stare at the tv screen, my hands are shaking, my eyes are watery, my face is now red
>.....mmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMYYYYY
>waddle over to her and start kicking her head
>blood starts to pool
>wake up you bitch i need help!
>tfw paramedics pronounce her dead
>tfw found out the disc was upside down

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>Mommy gives me $20 and tells me to go walk to the movies so she and New New Daddy can have some alone time
>"For tickets alone, this sum shall suffice. But I must eat too, and that begs a higher price!"
>Jesus Anon, when are you going to stop talking like that? It's really getting on my nerves
>bitch still gives me another $20
>"Mummy, upon leaving the theatre, the hour will be late. A ride I demand, and I don't like to wait!"
>Anon, the theater is a 5 minute walk away. Get home yourself
>"Neglect of your child is the worst of my triggers. Do you wish to see me set upon by unruly niggers?"
>Anon, don't use that language! We live in a safe neighborhood, now go
>"The march to the theatre looms long and unfriendly. To maintain my stamina, I require Tendies!"
>mummy is visibly mad at this point
>Anon, I'm not making you more tendies, you had two cases earlier. Your body doesn't need any more!
>"Ah, i see it's a matter of my digestive capacity. The solution, I assure you, is not beyond my sagacity!"
>stick thumb down throat
>puke all over mummy's special Just For Daddy dress
>"My stomach is emptied, it demands to be refilled! Now cook up more tendies, the only task in which you're skilled!"
>mummy starts crying
>walks toward bathroom
>I pull her back into the kitchen
>she makes tendies while crying silently

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>2 AM
>really fucking want some Lunchables
>wake up my stupid bitch of a mother and tell her to go to Kroger and buy me some
>"Anon, it's 2 AM and I have work in the morning, I'll get you some after work tomorrow."
>start slamming my head against the wall while screaming LUNCHABLES so the neighbors wake up
>"Anon, go the fuck to bed or I'll call the police."
>tell her if she calls the police I'll kill myself
>finally the bitch gets in the car and leaves
>takes her 45 minutes to get them
>look in the bag and see she got the Lunchables with Reese's instead of Skittles just to spite me
>thiswillnotstand.jpg
>fetch the machete from dad's old toolshed that's gone unused ever since he left
>corner mummy
>"You think this is fucking funny you fucking know I hate Reese's you stupid BITCH"
>she begins sobbing and farting uncontrollably out of fear
>open up her mother's urn and pour her ashes into one of my piss bottle and start chugging it infront of her
>she faints at the sight of this
>she oversleeps and is fired for being late
>stupid bitch know not to fuck with me now

fucking normies

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>saturday, 1am
>eating tendies with my favorite spicy sauce
>out of tangy mountain dew coolant
>my worst fear has been realized
>only a delicious mint ice cream sandwich can quench this heat
>head down to basement
>the refrigerator has a lock on it
>fucking cunts
>run upstairs to parents bedroom
>wake that stupid cunt up and ask her why the refrigerator has a fucking lock on it
>she tells me the doctor says that being this "overweight" in my early thirties is really bad or something
>i cut the bitch off right there and demand she open it
>she refuses, denying my basic human rights
>well if you want to play it that way
>head into my sisters room and find her little bastard baby is in its little bastard crib
>take a dump right next to the baby, and write "enjoy your weekend normies" on the wall
>next morning
>baby has to go to the hospital because of an eye infection
>may be permanently blind in its eye
so do you think they enjoyed their weekend?

>>714126199
>Tifa Lockhart
Nice taste, my friend, nice taste

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>ever since the GBP inflation I've been a little short on cashies
>need more and I need it fast!
>suddenly I get a brainwave
>i slam my body against my mummy's bedroom door, it flies open and I do a gangsta walk in but I'm quickly winded, my cleanest cargo shorts pulled to my knees, my Hannah Montana night shirt tucked into my undies, and my best fedora worn backwards and tilted on my head (something I kissed it for beforehand as a preemptive apology)
>"ay baby wassup, it's yo boy Tendie Fresh in da houuuuse"
>ever since that jungle noise they call (c)rap music has become popular again after years of being rightfully hated by any civilized member of society, I decided to join the fad and become a rapper too
>she sighs "anon please go back to sleep. It's 3 AM and I have to get ready for work in a few hours"
>"ay ay ay hoe, don't diss me, I'm here to give yo ass a concert," I feel like I'm doing very well at emulating a black person despite not having any experience being around one, "I call dis single 'Poopoo in da streetz,' I wrote it while I was in a very dark place"
>she massages her temples and sighs again
>i give her the best performance ever, it's a masterpiece of dancing, lyrics, and vocal music. I feel like it's worth a hefty reward of GBP
>I'm breathing heavily but I'm asking for the reward anyway
>she laughs, "you don't just walk in here, scream about hating the Jews between loud 'dun duns' that you make with your mouth and ask for points reserved for when you do something good."
>that whorebag is sitting there mocking me! Me! Her special little angel!
>i almost want to run back to my room crying and poopooing my pants out of embarrassment, but I decide to do what all black people do when their mummy's disrespect them
>i slapped her hard and she collapsed against the bed
>I take her hand and I write a coupon worth 50,000 GBP in her name with it
>I quickly waddle back to my room with it, farting frantically
>mfw I get more tendies and I'm super hip

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>wake up in my crib
>stretch out, my legs can barely fit between the bars
>as I move, I feel my poopoo sloshing around my diapers
>hmm, mommy seems to have forgotten to change me today
>my tummy rumbles
>look at clock besides GBP chart, 4:54 PM, almost time for my brekky
>I stand up in the crib and yell "RUMBLY-RUMBLY IN MY TUMMY, GIMME CHICKIE TENDIES MUMMY"
>no response
>mommy doesn't even care that her precious boy is hungies
>contemplate breaking my crib again, but I'm in a good mood since she since she gave me extra chickies yesterday at no GBP cost
>yell again, still no response
>keep yelling for about an hour until my throat starts to hurt
>struggle to move my portly frame out of the crib
>waddle downstairs, chanting "CRISPY OUTSIDE, SOFT INSIDE, MOMMY MOMMY WHERE'D YOU HIDE" with each step
>I can see mommy's shadow, she's in front of the telly sleeping
>sit on her lap, my poo poo leaks on her under my weight
>STILL no response
>this has gone too far
>start shaking her
>"TEN-DIES, TEN-DIES, TEN-DIES, CHICKIE-CHICKIE TEEEN-DIIIEEEES"
>amazing, she still hasn't woken up, the absolute NERVE of her
>notice she's holding a yellow tube, grab it
>it has small pieces of candy in it, but it's half empty
>selfish cunt doesn't even care that I'm a growing boy and need my sugar
>"be forewarned, mummy... this may suffice for now, but I expect tendies for din-din"
>lift tube and swallow all the remaining candy
>fall fast asleeps just like mummy

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>at new daddy's country cabin for the weekend while the house is fumigated
>him and mummy go out for the day, leave me in my race car bed that mummy carried all the way here on the bus because she can't afford gas any more
>noon rolls around, get hungry
>get out of bed, unlock the baby gate they set up (she doesn't know I know how, dumb bitch) and go into the kitchen/hall area in search of din dins
>NO FUCKING TENDIES
>just spam and jerky and soup in the cupboards and frozen deer in the freezer
>pile all the spam cans up and go pee pee on them to show what I think of this
>fucking normies don't have the first clue about nutrition, this is a fucking outrage
>go into new daddy's bedroom, maybe he keeps an emergency stash of tendies hidden like I do
>look under his bed
>nothing there but a load of magazines with pictures of ladies wearing no clothes and some men too
>there fucking MUST be tendies nearby because the magazines are covered in ranch
>notice a shoebox a little further back
>grab it and bring it out, it's heavy. These must be his tendies, quite a few of them too
>open it
>it's a gun
>looks like a Glock 17, I can tell from extensive experience in Counter-Strike
>take it out and pretend I'm in Wanted, making the bullet curve around the doorway and hitting Chad on the other side
>"HAHA FUCK YOU CHAD YOU SHIT I BET YOU REGRET THOSE WEDGIES NOW-"
>suddenly there's a loud crash in the hall and a man's voice shouting
>fill my diaper and start shaking
>the gun goes off, I go deaf and drop it
>crawl under the bed and squeeze my eyes shut
>work up the courage to check things out after a few minutes
>peak around kitchen corner
>new daddy is lying in a pile of spam cans, ouchie-juice leaking from his abdomen
>mummy is crying over him and on the phone to the police

this is going to cost some hefty GBP

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>sisters birthday friday
>her and her friends are having a party downstairs
>she begged my mom to let her do it somewhere else, but my mom said that she would make sure I wouldnt bother her and her friends
>she is 15 and her friends are around the same age
>all her friends are vapid cunts and I dont want to risk losing my virginity to anyone but my 10/10 virgin dream girl so I decide to stay in my room
>just finished watching a couple episodes of mlp
>those qt ponies always make me parched
>sneak past mother and go downstairs into the kitchen to grab another two liter mountain dew
>I crawl on the floor like a snake so I can slither by them without them see me
>their slut senses must have picked up on the fact that Im only wearing my semen stained undies
>they start to leave the kitchen revolted
>out of the corner of my eye I see the most beautiful semen demon you an imagine
>pig tails
>short shorts
>no make up
>she couldnt have been older than 12
>literally perfect
>I run over to her and grab her to take her into my room
>she starts screaming when i put my hands on that soft pale skin
>all the girls seem really scared
>lol. like I would be tainted by their gaping cunts
>i hiss at them and drag this beute up the stairs by the root of her hair
>dad must have heard the screaming and came to see what was happening
>right before I get into my room he hits me in the back of my head with a closed fist
>"anon bad!" he screams
>i drop the girl, turn and hiss at him.
>barely make it into my room with my life

Didnt get any sweet loli puss, but mom and dad got a visit from the police with the girls parents. kek. those sluts wont be coming back anytime soon

>say get to work bitch

kekd hard, don't know why

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>3.46 p.m.
>get a hankering for Dragon Ball Z (TV Series 1996 - 2003)
>cant get off couch due to muscular-skeletal indevelopment
>scream at mum upstairs
>doesnt reply
>hear sobbing, know the dumb bitch is awake
>yell that ill vomit on the cat
>hear her coming downstairs
>fucking whore took ages, i bet she needs those crutches because of her boyfriend tyrone's dick
>fucking an ape, racemixing filth could drop a dirty baby
>arrives after 44 seconds
>"three seconds late bitch!" i yell after swallowing a mouthfull of whipped cream and pizza
>"would you like me to put on muppets treasure island again dear?"
>stupid bitch cant even remember the schedule
>i keep staring at her, waiting for the timetable to work its way through her mushy brain
>"cars?" she says, clearly getting uncomfortable at her own incompetence
>im getting sick of this shit, dumb bitch needs to be broken in
>pick up a handfull of skittles
>"the lion king?" she says, watching my fist close around them
>sadistic cunt knows how hard activity is with my developmental problems
>pelt her with a handful of sticky skittles
>she flinches, and keeps guessing
>"monsters inc.?" her voice trembling now
>throw another handful of skittles
>this ones heavy on green
>greens my favourite
>now im fucking mad
>start turtling a shit in my pants
>she can tell from my face going red
>"b-b-bambi?" shes really scared now
>the estate agents not going to be impressed if she cant clean my shit up before tomorrow
>keep pushing my shit out
>"d-dragon b-b-ball?" shes sobbing now
>not close enough, i can feel the shit against the couch
>"dragon...ball...GT?"
>had enough
>"DRAGON BALL Z YOU FUCKING WHORE"
>shes weeping as she puts the tape in
>goes upstairs faster than she came down the lazy slut
>fucking bakugan starts playing
Fucking normies can't even read kanji

>>714111687
>Run at him and bite him in his crotch
>Run

wow fake af

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>dinner time
>belly is growling for popeyes
>jog into living room jumping up and down
>mom and new daddy, or should i say mommy stealer is sitting in couch
>tell mom ''mommy can we make a drive in at popsy-eyesy I really really wants some delicious loadsy wrapsy''
>new daddy aka mommy stealer tells me to stop jumping because my weight is shaking the whole house
>just look at him dead quiet
>cant come up with a comeback insult so just fart to show him how interested I am in him
>accidentally shit in my favorite MLP undies
>hes lucky hes only been mommys bf for short time and havent learned the house rules
>I bet i have more good boy points than him
>I let it go, but only this time
>look at mom and tell her to put on shoezy-wozy so we can go already
>''Sorry dear, me and new daddy were gonna relax rest of the night can't you heat a frozen pizza instead?''
>stare at them both dead quiet
>start jumping slowly in rhythm
>whole house starting to shake and things are falling on floor and breaking
>mommy stands up and yells ''ok ok lets go''
>another victory.jpeg
>putting on shoesy wozy when mommy-stealer is telling mom ''are you going to let him treat you like this? hes 34 years old he should have moved out years ago''
>that was the last straw, does he think hes the fucking alpha of the house all the sudden?''
>pull down my pants and take shit stained undies in my hand
>spin it around like a sling weapon and throw it in his face
>he falls down on floor and screams
>K.O
>mommy sees and tells me i can go up to my room and think about that I did and forget about popeyes
>running up to my room screaming and crying like anyone would to in my situation

been 30 min now and mommy hasnt even come up to the room with a heated pizza
rest of the night ruined and im starving
learned special spinning piss-bottle attack on /r9k/, empted shit jugs in my cum socks and will use them as sling weapons
new daddy and traitor cunt mother is gonna pay

Wish me luck

>>714131865
>If she doesn't like it she should have had an abortion. She chose this life.
Agreed! All our mothers used to be slutty normalfags bitches. We wouldn't have pity with them normally. Ironically the only reason we do pity them is because they forced us into existence, which is the same reason we should hate them even more

How the fuck do you virgins treat your mothers like this. You are the most entitled, lazy, shitty neckbeards in the world. You all deserve to be lobotimized and castrated.

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>enjoying my yummy tummy tendies and masturbating to super princess peach
>typical monday night
>suddenly notice its almost 2:30 am
>icarly reruns at 2:30 am
>there is an astonishing lack of icarly and or tvs in my lair
>call my poopnosed mommy
>she doesn't come in
>wait for a patient 5 seconds minimum
>call again
>no answer, the bitch is still sleeping
>she has no idea who she's dealing with
>hit my head against the wall and start screaming
>i can see her wake up from acoss the hall
>threaten to kill myself again
>finally she comes in
>it's about time
>says some shit about bothering the whole apartment complex and how she has to go to work tomorrow
>doesn't realize i don't care
>tell her to get the tv in here
>"anon, you already have 3 tvs sweetie"
>"no mommy, i want the new tv in here"
>she sighs and tells me to get up and go to the living room myself if i want to watch it
>sheathe my katana
>politely explain that i have 1 tv for each show i watch and none of the tvs are made for icarly
>stupid cunt doesn't understand that watching another show on the wrong tv completes imbalance
>whore didn't learn that that's the reason why i set fire to the last apartment
>"fine, but only if you clean up your poopoo jugs while im gone"
>that fucking cunt telling me what to do
>while the bitch is gone empty the shit-jugs onto her bed as punishment
>come back
>she's still struggling to get the damn thing in here
>take another poopoo on the ground to pass the time and show her who's boss
>the staggering wench comes in here
>slips on the poopoo
>tv falls on her head
>she stops moving
>blood comes from behind
>dont care, tv's in my room
>plug it in
>realize ill have to watch the tv from top-down because stupid whore is trapped underneath
>dont care, it's pretty funny
>turn on tv.
>buzz-lightyear of star command comes on
>look at the clock
>it's 2:30 pm
>PM
>Take another shit on my mom for making me fuck up again

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>be my last birthday
>finally the big 3-0
>mummy automatically gives me 10 extra good boy points because it's my birthday
>i wake up and instantly release my bowels in my crib because it's my birthday
>mummy comes in and asks me what i've done
>"poo poo mummy, now come the pee pee"
>pull down diaper and piss all over mummy
>"Anon! What on Ear-"
>"POO PEE POO PEE MUMMY I'M 30"
>"y-yes a-anon hahaha i guess you are"
>"you look sad mummy! What's wrong!?"
>"n-nothing son"
>"mummy i want my cake! I WANT CAKE!"
>mummy brings me my tendy crisp crunch cake
>"mhh yum yum tendy cake! tendy cake!"
>after cake i want my actual tendies, i call for mummy
>"mummy deliver me the tender chicky tendies!"
>"sorry anon, i had to use them all for the tendy cake!"
>"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
>instantly force the whole undigested tendy cake out of my anus and hurl it at her face then piss myself as a defense mechanism
>"you ruin everything, whore!"
>she starts to cry
>SHE's the one crying after ruining my birthday

Retards

>hurr durr it's only an act to keep away normies

And that's why you're an evolutionary mistake.

> but normies are stupid and don't understand my elite state of mind

No, you're just acting like a fuck wit because you can't handle the fact you're in no way special. See: tumblrinas.

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>Wake up at 4pm
>Hear talking downstairs
>Start yelling I NEED MY BIG BOY SLEEP
>Waddle over to the door, knock poo-poo jar over
>*whoops, guess mommy has some work to do* I knock over another just for good measure.
>Waddle down the stairs to living room. Mommy is talking to a lady in a business suit about "coverage"
>I NEED MY BIGBOY SLEEP
>Mommy looks in my direction and apologizes to the lady.
>Notice that lady has really pretty hair
>Mommy tells me to go upstairs
>Lady has really really pretty hair
>My pee-pee goes hardy-wardy
>The diaper pops off from the force of my pee-pee, leaving me naked except for my Fluttershy t-shirt
>"Mommy is this the girlie-friendie I asked for?"
>I can't believe that fucking bitch finally did something right.
>Mommy looks really emberassed and tells me to go upstairs. The lady is really scared.
>Start waddling over to the lady.
>She recoils back in horror.
>Keep waddling over.
>I slip on the diaper around my ankles and fall to the ground.
>I do a big poo poo and begin crying on the ground, but my pee-pee is still hardy-wardy at my new girlie-friendie, so I keep crawling towards her
>The lady turns around and runs out the door
>Mommy has tears in her eyes, tries to lift me off the ground
>"Mommy, was she my girlie-friendie you got me?"
>She brushes the tears off her face and nods
>"Yes dear, s-she's just embarrassed. She's never seen a boy as handsome as you before!" She says as she wipes away another tear.
>I smile, proud of how handsome I am
>Mommy tells me that maybe if I earn enough good boy points, she will get me another girlie
>She pulls me up the stairs and starts cleaning the floor
>Uh-oh, my pee-pee is still hard
>I get out of my bed and walk up behind mommy
>Tell her she can be my girlie-friendie too
>She looks kind of disgusted for some reason, says mommy can't do that
>I start yelling REEEEEEEE as I rip off my diapers and shove my pee-pee at her face
>She sucks my weenie to make me stop yelling

Good day today.

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>>714111687
>the Littlest Pet Shop cake
You, sir, have patrician taste in cakes!

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>3 o clock in the morning
>get hungry for chicken nuggets
>go into mummies room
>she is play-wrestling with new daddy
>I don't like new daddy
>they are playing under the sheets
>they don't see me enter the room
>I remove my clothes
>I squat beside the bed
>as I squeeze, I let out several grunts and moans
>mummy and new daddy are also grunting and moaning
>squeezing hard, I feel my sphincter throb and pulse
>double double toil and trouble something wicked this way comes
>the brown goodness pours forth from my anus and veers in a sweeping motion slightly to the left and touches the ground
>my sphincter closes off, like a valve, sealing my back passage shut
>I behold my work
>a solid mass of brown goodness
>I am proud
>mummy and new daddy have stopped wrestling
>new daddy says "um...d-do you smell something?"
>mummy pleads "oh god....oh god please not again"
>mummy is well learned in the ways of brown goodness
>but new daddy still must learn
>he is about to
>throwing back the sheets
>mummy and new daddy look upon my work and despair
>new daddy retches at the sight of me standing, now with brown goodness in hand
>new daddy screams "is th-that fucking real?!?! I-is that fucking shit??!?!?!
>mummy buries her face in her hands in shame
>she knows what is coming
>I lean on top of new daddy
>he tries to struggle free
>I'm 350 lbs of pure blubber
>he's going nowhere
>his arms are pinned beneath my might
>I take my brown goodness and paint new daddy's face
>I make him a brown man
>a brown chocolate man with my brown chocolate goodness
>he shakes violently and vomits several times
>I struggle to keep him still
>mummy is sobbing by the bedside
>her days of trying to reason with me are gone
>she has given up all hope
>she is broken
>after I am finished my work, new daddy is covered in my brown goodness and chunks of his own vomit, tears streaming down his face
>after daddy is done gagging, I lean in close
>I whisper "can you take me to mcdonalds to get some chicken nuggets?"

>>714108906
>shadow killer
>story confirmed for true
ishygddt

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>Mummy walks in the door holding bags of groceries
>"Looks like mummy got some groceries, and she looks friendly. I wonder perhaps, did she pick up my tendies?"
>Yes, anon, I got you your tendies. They'll be ready in time for dinner.
>"Methinks, perhaps, they'd best be made now; Lest ye become burdened by poo poo somehow..."
>Anon, I don't have time. I need to go pick up your sister from school.
>"Sissy can wait, but poo poo cannot. The tendies will be here and they will be hot."
>Please don't do this again, anon. We can't afford to keep buying you new diapers.
>"You've forsaken me whim, let the poo poo commence. The contents within will be quite immense"
>What are you... OH MY GOD, ANON. THAT SMELLS TERRIBLE
>"I warned you, dear mummy, most surely I did. This is what you get for neglecting your kid!"
Then I played CS: Go for 26 minutes before taking a lengthy nap. Upon my awakening, a warm plate of tendies. Life is comfy.

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>>714139769

>>714137516
He calls it running, we call it rush-waddling.

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>2am. Hungry
>Grab my bitch summoning stick. Bang it on the wall until Mommy arrives
>She takes ages to arrives. She's pregnant from some Chad who then dumped her
>Tell her I'm hungry and want to go to Burger King
>"No Anon, it's late. I have to work tomorrow
>Tell her it's no wonder Chad left after knocking her up and if she's not nicer to her Good Boy, he'll leave her too.
> Her eyes well up and she drives me to Burger King.
>I get a kid's meal and play with my toys for a while.
>Tell Mommy I want to be the Burger King and to get me a cardboard BK crown.
>She asks the manager but he says they're all out.
>I start screeching REEEEEEEE but Mommy says there's nothing she can do as there's no other Burger King's open at this hour.
>She drives me home. I sulk and watch Kung Fu Panda.
>I get an idea. I hide behind the couch and call Mommy into the room.
> When she arrives I kung fu chop her in the belly
>She rolls around on the ground, crying that she thinks I've hurt the baby.
>I pour my piss jug on her head and demand she apologises for not making me the Burger King and tell me I'm the best at Kung Fu.
>She keeps sobbing so I drag her into the cupboard and lock her in there until she learns her lesson.
Fucking normies. Why do they do this?

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>be me, last night
>mom tells me we're going to a family event, wants me to come
>"it will be good for you to get out of the house, anon"
>"fuck off slut" (im in the middle of minecraft building)
>she UNPLUGS MY COMPUTER, i freak out
>dad comes down and yells, mom is in tears
>im infuriated, facing the other way, but mutter obligation, feeling crafty in order to spite my normie parents
>i shower, brush teeth, and get dressed in normie clothes (jeans, sketchers, and white shirt)
>come upstairs, mom promises tendies, things start looking brighter
>we arrive, people try to greet me and say "its nice to see me"
>typical american slave families all around, i scoff to myself and acknowledge no one
>we sit down, scan through the menus
>only shit-tier food: lobster, crab, grilled chicken pastas and steak
>fuck this, ask mom wheres the tendies
>she says that they dont have any
>says I'll get tendies next week if I behave myself tonight
>the gall!
>lying bitch, i become infuriated
>i throw my menu and stand up, knock over my chair and my water glass (i had asked for mountain dew)
>"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" I shout loudly in the middle of the busy restaurant
>all normies shocked, i feel a rush of adrenaline
>leap up on table
>decide to HULK THE FUCK OUT
>ANON SMASH
>try to tear apart shirt, doesnt work
>oh well
>leap down from table
>storm out of restaurant with pride
>mom and dad come out, mom is crying and dad is fuming
>mission accomplished
>silent drive home as i snicker to myself in the back seat
>mum makes me tasty tendies for brekky&lunch today
>now enjoying a nice sunday night on /b/ and basking in my accomplishment.
>mfw

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>>714140078
>*whoops, guess mommy has some work to do* I knock over another just for good measure.

Keked hard. Jolly good show anon

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>5 AM
>Browsing YLYL threads on /b/
>Laugh so hard I shit myself
>Whoops, special baby needs a new diapy
>"MAAAAAMAAAAAA"
>Hear frantic footsteps running down the hall
>Mama opens the door winded. She can't forget what happened last time.
>"Baby boy made a messy messy"
>Lay down on the bed with feet up in the air
>She's changing my diapy
>Wait. What's that feeling?
>Instead wet wipes she's using fucking TOILET PAPER
>Kick her in the face
>"YOU FUCKING BITCH! WHAT IS THIS SANDPAPER SHIT? IS THIS HOW YOU TREAT YOUR SPECIAL BABY? DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME?!"
>By this point she's shrunken in fear
>"I-I'm sorry anon b-but I forgot to get the w-wet wipes when I was out getting your t-tendies"
>"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>Go on a full blown rampage
>Roll down the hall spewing rancid diarrhea
>Knock over Grammas ashes
>Knock over the wine rack
>Roll onto Mama and crack her femur
>"TENDIES TENDIES TENDIES AND WIPEY WIPES NOW!"
>Limps to the car
>Rushes out to go to the store
>Go back to browsing the 'Chon
>15 minutes later she's back with the wet wipes and 4 boxes of tendies
>The nearest store is 25 minutes away
>"A-anon I have the wipeys you wanted"
>"TENDIES NOW REEEEE!"
>Makes me 2 whole trays of tendies
>Gives me wipey wipes and makes me a special bubble bath
She hasn't looked at me in the eyes since. That's what she gets for neglect

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>be me 31 year old fatass NEET
>11pm
>watching a Tyson Tendie Commercial on repeat
>rumbly tummy says it's time for another batch
>waddle through my room
>trip on a poop jug from last night
>spend 10 minutes farting and struggling getting to my feet
>thought for sure I told mummy to clean my room today
>make it out of the room and down the stairs
>mummy's cleaning the kitchen
>"mummy mummy your boy is hungry! Where are my tendies?"
>"Anon, you ate the last box. And no, it's too late to go out now. I have work very early."
>A flicker of rage sparks up inside me
>"then how will your good boy eat tendies tonight?"
>"I don't know. It's not my problem. You're 31 for Christ's sake"
>what's that? not her problem. Fucking kek
>"you brought me into this world you stupid bitch. Now TAKE CARE OF ME! Before I shove a poop jug up your cunt you fucking whore."
>she raises her arms in surrender.
>"fine" she sighs.
>watch her leave
>40 minutes later she's finally back
>she brings in great value brand tendies
>great value
>FUCKING GREAT VALUE
>don't even say anything
>hobble to my room farting frantically
>grab biggest poop jug I can find
>back in the kitchen she has her back to me finishing up dishes
>kick her as hard as I can knocking her off her feet
>plop down all 300 pounds on her chest
>feel her ribs crack as I unscrew my shit jug
>"ANON! ANON NO!!! PLEASE!!!" She gasps out, her eyes full of terror. She knows what's coming
>arms and legs flailing all around but I'm too heavy
>slowly pour god knows how old tendie diarrhea on her face
>overflows over her mouth
>watch her cough and gargle on my own shit
>see the life begin to drain from her eyes
>use all my might and stand up
>she rolls over gasping and grabbing her chest
>Take out peepee
>piss in her hair
>"Tyson now bitch"
>mfw that cunt drove to wally world with shit on her face and broken ribs

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>go to whataburger this evening with mummy for my daily tendies-brekky
>everything's going as usual
>there's a new employee at the drive-through window
>he says the tendies are being cooked and that i'll have to wait a few minutes
>mummy offers 5 GBP if i just let it slide
>accept her offer; should have played hardball in retrospect
>the person hands the tendies to mummy after SIX minutes
>says "sorry about the wait, here's your chicken strips"
>strips
>REEEEEEEEEEEEE
>scream "THEY'RE CALLED TENDIES YOU NORMALSCUM WAGESLAVE"
>mummy apologizes and explains my condition to the man
>he's visibly restraining himself from laughing
>cry to mummy about why life is unfair and blame her for giving me shitty genes
>she breaks down crying and gives me 10 bonus GBP
>better than usual tendies-brekky, couldn't have planned it better

she's still crying in the next room. think i can milk her for more points?

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>mfw this fucking thread

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>anon time to go to gamgams
>GO AWAY MOM I DON'T WANNA
>dumb cunt trying to pull me away from my furry cuck trap porn
>"she's making us dindins anon
>get up and demand that whore dresses me
>tries to put a polo shirt on me
>NO THE SONIC SHIRT YOU RETARDED BITCH
>mummy chokes back sobs
>"but sweetie its got icky bad touch stains
>GOTTA GO FAST
>she sighs and gently tucks my wee tumtum tightly into the 5X shirt
>get to gamgams
>she makes dinner
>isnt tendies
>start crying
>"anon please stop crying you're 30 years old please be mature "
>GOTTA GO FAST
>i do a WCW goldberg spear to mummy
>climb the kitchen table
>start turtle heading in my big boy diapey
>IF YA SMELLLLLL-LALALA
>elbow drop mummy
>dementia ridden gamgam sits smiling
>run off and steal her meds
>two weeks later gamgam dies without her meds
>try not to laugh at funeral
>"anon you were such a good boy at the funeral you didn't cry at all"
>earn enough good boy points for a john cena deluxe aggression action figure and din dins of choice
>undisputed world tendie federation champion

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>be me
>realise its almost christmas and I havent achieved anything significant this year
>still no gf
>still no friends
>still virgin
>once again I will be celebrating christmas and new years with /b/ as my only company
>go on /b/
>come to this thread
>read stories from other /b/tards that are making fun of people who actually act like autistic neckbeards and totally aren't projecting our own sadness and insecurities onto the story in a way that is so absurd its funny thus giving us temporary relief from our crippling loneliness by providing us with the ability to laugh at ourselves and give us a slight glimmer of hope that maybe things will get better even though deep down we know they never will
>y-yeah...w-we're better than them......r-right guys
>its not like WE are autistic friendless perma-virgin loser NEETS right guys?ha...haha....hahahaha
>pretend I dont think about killing myself several times a day

pic unrelated

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>finally give in to mummy's demands and take a trip to the store
>in Walmart, browsing tendies
>comparing two brands while singing the tendies song under my breath
>"tendies tendies ten-dies, 'til the hunger end-ies"
>start tapping my foot
>"ten-dies ten-dies ten-dies, don't share them with your friend-ies"
>start dancing in the aisle
>sing at the top of my voice
>"OH TENDIES TENDIES TEN-DIES, GOTTA LOVE THEM TEN-DIES"
>security approaches me and asks me to leave because I'm scaring people
>I keep singing and dancing, pretending they're not there
>rip open a bag of tendies and start scattering them in the air like confetti as I bop down the aisle
>one hits a small child in the eye, it starts mewling
>the mother comes over and starts yelling at me
>can't hear you, bitch
>and then she fucking slaps me
>she SLAPS. ME.
>YOU DO NOT FUCKING TOUCH ANON GOODBOY UNLESS YOU ARE FEEDING HIM, CHANGING HIM OR TUCKING HIM IN
>give her a hard shove
>she falls on her bum
>grab a handful of frozen tendies and force feed them to her while singing at the top of my voice
>security guard tries to tase me
>the prongs bounce off my armoured trenchcoat
>slowly turn to face him with what I think is a triumphant grin
>he's holding a little canister
>starts spraying it in my face
>hah, good luck getting that pepper spray past these shades fucko
>start laughing and breathe some of it in accidentally
>OH FUCK THIS SHIT BURNS LIKE THE SPICIEST MEMES
>lash out, hit him in the head and he falls over
>scratching at my throat, can barely breathe
>nose is gushing snot
>swallow some and start puking
>slip on my puke and fall on the floor
>start punching myself in the head and kicking the floor while screaming
>manage to shout "FUCKING NORMIES WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME" in between bouts of retching
>police arrive and cuff me
>fall asleep in the police car and wake up chained to bed with a note reading "Anon, I'm deducting 1000 GBP for your frankly disgusting behaviour"

>mfw I still have 9863 GBP left over

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>be me
>38 years old, still unemployed
>4am
>horny after watching 10 episodes of Pokemon: Johto Journey
>clomp my way across the landing to mummy's room
>clamber onto her bed
>MUMMY WUMMY ITS TIME FOR MY TUMMY TO GIVE YOU THE TENDIES THAT COME FROM MY ENDIES
>she wakes groggy and confused
>"Oh no, no Anon, please. We said-"
>she bursts into tears
>"We said I would only do it once. You got your 50,000 GBP to promise to never do it again."
>stupid bitch is crying hysterically now
>"I need to get up for work in an hour. The office told me if I'm late again I'll be f-f-fired."
>grab her hair and yank her head up
>NO MUMMY ITS TIME FOR YOU TO RECYCLE THE CHICKEN TENDIES BECAUSE TENDIES FROM MY ENDIES ARE YUMMY FOR MUMMYS TUMMY
>tries to wriggle away, gasping hysterically, but I grab her slender wrists with my Charizard strength
>MUMMY YOU ARE SO PRETTY I tell her as the tears stream down her red, puffy face
>MUMMYEEEEEEEERRRGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!! YOU HAVE TO EAT THE SECOND HAND TENDIES
>she nods slowly, lower lip quivering
>squat myself over mummy's accepting face and pull down my black shorts with the flames up the sides
>mummy opens her mouth, trembling with horror and racked with sobs as she tries to keep still, I can feel her hot breath on my hairy, shit-encrusted anus
>(tendies tendies from my endies, from my tummy into mummy) I whisper into the night air
>within seconds I feel something
>a gushing of release and relief from my guts expels explosive and gaseous from my itchy bumhole, spraying and splopping chunks and jets and gooey ropes of every colour all over mummy's face and into her pink, waiting mouth
>hear her gagging and crying even harder underneath me
>relief is so intense I fall face-first onto her bed, booty naked in the air
>EAT MY TENDIES MUMMY, THEYRE SO GOOD AND YUMMY I say into the bedding, muffled
>hear her trying to swallow
>just keeps gagging and crying
>I fall asleep there and when I wake up at 3pm she's gone

fucking normie bitch

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>>714108486
>not using SHARINGAN technique
I trained you better

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>be watching nemo in my room while my mom makes diner
>yummy yummy i hope the diner will please my tummy
>i go downstairs to check on mummy in the kitchen to see if she's not calling a psychiatrist or anything naughty like that
>she's not. she's making diner like the good mummy she is
>i walk on all fours towards the dish to see what sweet yummy food she made for her good boy
>it's braised vegetables
>braised fucking vegetables
>I rise and look down at my mom from my 6'5" height
>i start to chant
>MUMMY MUMMY YOUVE BEEN NAUGHTY LITTLE LADDIE HAVE TO PUNISH YOU MUMMY
>she quietly starts sobbing, knowing exactly what will ensue
>i pin her down to the floor with all my 360 lbs might, an exquisite wonder starts to form in my undies, like a rare bird
>i take the magical present and shove it right in her eyes
>immediately she starts vomiting
>PLEASE ANON PLEASE STOP NO
>Another flow of brown mystery finds its way in her mouth
>sshhhhh mummy you know i do this for your own good
>eventually she stops fighting back, she just lays there motionless
>i waddle over and take out frozen tendies from the freezer
>since i don't know how to use the microwave, i eat them raw
>while i'm concentrated on something else, mummy wakes up and runs upstairs, screaming like dementia
>i know she is sad, but i have to be firm if i want to teach her how to be a good mummy
>today was a good day

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This thread killed the remnants of my soul

>>714150699
should've taught this guy: >>714137682

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>Be NEET
>Parents are wagecucks, tell them how pathetic they are at dinner every night
>One day wake up, 6:30
>Nobody woke me up for dinner at 6:00
>Run down the steps, screeching at my parents for trying to let me starve
>No answer
>Hmmm
>Go into parents room
>See them both dead, holding hands, a gun in each of their off hands and a bullet wound through both of their heads
>Note between them
>"Dear anon, we are sorry, but we cannot stand this type of existence anymore. We both love you very much, but our lives simply aren't worth living if they're going to be like this. We left you chicken tenders and bagel bites in the freezer, and instructions on how to reheat them. We're so sorry honey bunches. Please, please forgive us, and be okay. Love, mom and pop."
>mfw my parents became an hero because they couldn't stand being wagecuck's anymore
>Start to panic, know that Jewman will make me leave the house if they find out my parents are dead
>Hide their bodies under the mattress, eat the tendies that they left me (ignore shitty bagel bites)
>they left me enough power and internet to last a while, play Smite & Runescape for a few weeks
>Eventually run out of tendies
>Go to the bites
>Almost out of those when I hear a knock at the door
>It's Mr. Shekelsteens wagecuck HR Person
>Parents are both high up in their company, when they wouldn't answer their phone for such a long time, Mr. Shekelsteen sent this asshole to check on them
>Tell him they went on vacation in Wagekuktopia
>He doesn't believe me, starts to get panicked because he smells "carrion"
>Runs up to my parents bed and finds them
>I get charged for murder even though I didn't do it
>Court case lasts 17 months, spend most of my time in lock up because I can't afford bail, not after they stopped giving me my NEETbux
>I am found not guilty, but they also find that I am "Mentally unfit"
>They give me triple the NEETbux parents used to give me
>mfw I keep their house and eat tendies like a king for my entire life

>be me
>actually have piss bottles
>run out of empties just now and have to pee in bathroom
>god damnit
>what have I become

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>be 27 y.o.
>wakey time at noon, early start today so I can get my bonus 5 good boy points
>Mommy comes into bedroom with the cutest widdle bruises all over her face from my tantrum last night
>Looks worried
>Looks like she hasn't slept in days
>But it's all alright, she does it for the bestest son in the world
>Mommy has breakfast on a platter, it's chicken tendies and habanero sauce
>I only eat McDonald's habanero sauce
>I take a widdle bite of my tendies dipped in the sauce
>it's not habanero
>eyes dilate
>jaw dislocates
>open mouth
>scream "BITCH WHERE THE FUCK IS MY SAUCE?"
>Mommy looks scaredy waredy
>Her lip shakes a bit
>Starts to cry
>"It's discontinued anon, McDonald's doesn't have it anymore"
>"YOU BETTER GET IT RIGHT NOW OR I'M GONNA GET UPSET!"
>Mommy just stands there crying
>I start shitting and pissing myself
>"MOMMY! POOPOO! PEEPEE! PLOPPIES! SWIRLIES!"
>Mommy just stands there crying
>"WELL BITCH GET A MOVE ON!"
>Mommy stops crying, looks at me with a angry look
>Walks out of the room
>Walks back into the room with a big scary tube that makes a loud noise that hurt my ears
>Woke up in white room with doctors all around and my chicken tendies across the room
>tfw too fat to get out of hospital bed to get tendies
>cry
>post my story on /b/

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>be me
>be in mummy wummy's attic
>hear mummy and new daddy making the Forrest Gump sounds
>decide it's time to cash in GBP cache
>503 GBP
>this means soooooo many tendies
>Swing open mummy's door and see new daddy pumping cucumber in mummy
>"mummy i need tendie-wendies!"
>"fuk off m8" screechies new daddy as he spews mayonaise
>begin to cry
>run to attic
>spirit broken
>get on tumblr and read about self harm
>time to show mummy how much i love the tendies
>take katana and begin James Franco-ing my limbs ie 127 hrs
>ketchup & bbq all over
>bread myself in pee pee jars and baby powder
>roll to mummy's door
>mfw she's at the door crying
>mfw im human tendie

>>714151796
If your life has actually come to this, please, kill yourself you waste of human life.

>>714108486
9/10

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>29 year old NEET
>wake up 3 pm
>Roll over to the edge of the bed
>hit something
>forgot about full shit jug from last night
>rolls off bed, shatters on the floor
>shrug
>"MUMMY MUMMY MESSY MESSY POOPOO POOPOO!"
>mummy's up in 3 seconds flat; cunt knows not to fuck around after the poopoo spatula incident
>mummy opens the door
>"oh dear, did my sweetpea make a messy messy? My poor baby"
>bitch starts cleaning it up
>suddenly feel tummy growling
>realize mummy never brought tendies up for breakfast like I told her to
>that stupid bitch I swear
> "MUMMY MUMMY WHERE ARE THE TENDIES "
>"hold on sweetpea I can't do two things at once "
>"TENDIES NOW TENDIES NOW!!" I chant as i become full with rage. Why can't the cunt just do what I say?
>fuck this shit. This is the last straw
>run over
>pick up one of the glass shards covered in shit
>ram it up mummy's butthole as hard as I can as she's bent over cleaning
>bitch falls over in my poop wallowing in pain
>pick up another shard
>"No, please sweetpea! I'm sorry!" She begins to sob
>"I'll make tendies anytime you want! Just don't..."
>bitch learned from yesterday
>drop shard
>her shit smeared face washes over in relief
>walk over
>piss on her face for good measure

fucking normies

I̡͌̾ͧ̅̃͗̽̊̚͝҉̡̬̪̰̳̺̥̞̮̬͖̠̰̟͖̀ ̶̥͖͚̗̝̝̻̭̯̈̽͒͆̓͒͑͂ͣͣ̏ͮ̽͂ͦ̚͘͢͝͞h̙̭͇͉̠̐̎͂̋͌͟͢a̡͔̟̥̭̻̝̘͎̞͔̱̹͍̮̐̿̃ͪ̍ͭ̾ͣ̀ͪͣ̉̃͌̎̊͞͝tͩ̏͋͂҉̧̧̺̺̦͖͍̝̰̻̗e̵̍̓ͤ̌͂̈́͆͆ͭ͏̤̤̮̱̣̝̫͔̠͟ͅͅ ̸̷̹͙̰̬̟͈̥͓̥͕̏̔͊̎͛ͫ̇ͣ̏̓͐̓̇͟͜ņ̵̢̨̙͕̬͖͕͕͚͔̥̰̺̺̼̙͚͖͎̄̾̍͊̂ͫ͌̒̉̅͊̇ͧ͋̈́ͅi̵̻̦̗̭̱ͨ̎̓ͮ̋̎́̔ͩ̒̓ͣ́̚̚̚͟͝ģ̧̱̬̺̖͖̖̺̳̍̈ͩ̈̈́̇̅̎ͬ̇͒̈̔̅́͜͢g̸̶̷̘̥̣̣͚̤̼͆͗̏̍ͪ̈̏ͦͮͤͦ́̚̚ẹ͇͓̯͙̹̲̲͗̐̔͂ͩͣͪ̒͢ͅr͑̉̃ͨͦͨ̉ͤ̅̊̒͋̽̾ͭ̚҉̡̥̟̗̠̹̦͓͉̟̦̮͔̞ͅs̸̛̞̳̬̹͇͔͍̖̬̞̀͒̏̄ͭ̿̀

>>714111087
10/10

Made my face numb.

>>714152679
You need to get that bitch on a leash, you give an inch and they'll take a mile

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>be me
>wake up in a cold sweat wheezing
>hungry.wav
>waddle over to kitchen
>exhausted from the walk and lay on kitchen floor like an overturned giant slug
>finally get up and open freezer
>no tendies
>almost suffer cardiac arrest
>feel a festering "REEEE" in the back of my throat
>this_ends_now.jpg
>waddle as fast as I can towards the slut bitch cunt's room
>watch over her
>she looks exhausted from working her two jobs
>"Mommy?"
>no response
>oh_no_boy-o.png
>"MOOOOM!"
>Mommy wakes up with a gasp
>looks at me and starts crying
>"Oh, anon, no... I- I forg--"
>get unto the bed on top of her
>hear her groan under weight and hear something pop
>"No nuggies so I make Mommy into huggies"
>"Sweetie, I--"
>"NO NUGGIES SO I MAKE MOMMY INTO HUGGIES!!!"
>with speeds that are unfathomable I pull down my pants and put her face right into my butt
>haven't taken a poopie in weeks
>let_it_go.gif
>as horrible juicy farts are released from my cave, an explosion of chunky diarrhea explodes into my Mom's face
>as thunderous farts and blobs of poopie explode, I roar and tremble in orgasmic pleasure, my saggy tits jiggling in unison to my quicering jowls
>"GOD HAS LEFT US MOMMY!!!!"
>hear my Mommy gagging and sobbing
>sleep on top of mommy because ordeal made me sleepy
>wake up next morning
>Mommy gone
>waddle over to fridge
>Tyson nuggies on shelf

Give me one good reason NEET life isn't worth it

>>714108486
This thread is 11 out of fucking 10

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>i wake up for another sing-songy sunshiney funday
>i stretch and yawn as I rip my daily wakey gas, the feeling of liquid splattering against my Magic School Bus jammies makes me proud
>i haul myself out of bed, kissing my Rei Ayanami body pillow good morning, only for my legs buckle out from under my generous frame
>oh well! I guess I'll have to be a Roly Poly from now on
>i roll over to my GBP chart and check it
>I've saved up a whole 5 GBP! That's a new record I'm SURE mummy will be proud of!
>i roll down the stairs to see what mumsy is up to this wonderful morning
>i slip and crack my nose against the stairpost
>mumma gets up shocked, "Anon are you okay?!"
>i'm bleeding from my nose and it has a weird shape, but I don't care, "mummy mummy, where's the yummy chickie tendies for my tummy?"
>"what?"
>i lift my shirt and begin slapping my tummy like a bongo "your precious little angel has saved five GBP, make some chickie tendies, and make them all for me!"
>"Anon, you know the price for a tendie meal is 20 Good Boy Points. And after the Legoland incident you should be grateful that you still have 5 left."
>i freeze. This BITCH, has the fucking GALL, to deprive me of my well deserved poultry cutlets.
>i sit up and begin slamming my feet on the floor angrily and punching my head
>"YOUR SPECIAL LITTLE BOY HAS BEEN GOOD FOR FAR TOO LONG, TENDIES NOW YOU BITCH OR I SHALL DO YOU WRONG"
>she closes her eyes, "Anon, please calm down..."
>i begin screaming and simultaneously poopooing and peepeeing my pants, but my engine has been burned out and I curl up in my own waste, peacefully sleeping
>i wake up clean and tethered to my bed, a plate of yummy tendies on my tummy with a note from mama jama saying she's sorry for being so harsh and that she's proud of me for being such a good boy
Being a bad boy has its perks, but nothing beats the satisfaction of being mummy's good little boy!