I am. Living with the mom like a bum at the moment so I can put all money towards a 30 minute short film good enough to gain attention in the festival circuit. I do still photography in the meantime to keep me sane.
>Wanted to be an evil scientist >always loved doing science shit at home >also pyromaniac so used to light stuff on fire and see what burned and didn't burn >Used to torture insect to see how long they lasted >made "potions" out of everything >too bad I lost all ambitions as I grew older becuase I was so autistic >now I'm just a neet with nothing to show for
>>704452542 it's really stupid, but my childhood dream was to be a drifter and never be tied down. just travel the country, working odd jobs, making just enough to stay fed, meeting people and seeing new places.
i'm not afraid to work. i've done everything from manual labor to office management to food service to industrial sales. i'm not lazy.
i just don't like staying in one place for too long, worrying about what it takes to maintain a house, being stuck in a rut.
but i failed. i got married. i have a house. i have a long-term career. and i hate all of it. in my closet, there's a massive camping pack with everything i need to just walk away from my life forever and start over as a filthy hobo. i think i would rather go for it and fail and die, cold, starving, and alone in a ditch by the side of the road than keep doing what i'm doing now for the next 30 years.
i wanted to become a soldier realized it was bc playing vidya and actually being a soldier is dumb then i wanted to be a musician i didn't have the patience to learn even guitar because i went too deep into punk rock, drugs, and booze then i wanted to kill myself buddhism and hard work fixed that one Now i'm learning to become a software developer. I don't want to become anything anymore. Though i don't do the meditation now, it was great for healing the soul and the mind, but i never believed the esoteric mumbo jumbo around it. I just want to work, play vidya, practice on guitar again, work out every other day and get a fuckbuddy. i'm still at least 2 years away from real peace, but i had to learn to appreciate it.
Don't get me wrong, i'd still cheer and applaud at the sight of all the men, women, and children of this world burning to ash. But this is alright too. And i'm not even nearly as edgy as most people you'd meet.
This whole thread is so sad. All these dreams crashed by reality. All our hopes and goals that could not be achieved. And now what? We sit and rot in this damned website, wasting our lives. How much are we going to live? 70?100 years? How old are you anon? How much time do you got? And one has to wonder... What is the point of it all. At the end of the day, we go to our bed, sleep and then restart. We retire at our 60s. Sick, tired, unable. And then, one day, we do not wake up. And what did we achieve? What was the point of trying hard to be successful? Did you build an empire? Did you rule a kingdom? No. All you did for this world while you lived, your biggest change on earth was moving the earth that will now burry you beneath it.
Why not pursue your most stupid dreams anon? You won't live much to enjoy anything, so why not take a risk? But none of us does. And when you look back it's too late. It's always too late.
>>704452542 To become a Botanist or Computer/Software engineer after graduating college.
Was forced to join the military immediately after graduation, washed out, re-enlisted a year later, washed out again, and am now trying to pursue two degrees that will only make my life harder from here on.
That's the worst thing, isn't it lads? I vividly remember how full of hope and dreams I was. Then life just smacks you good and leaves you to wonder if it would've been better not to dream at all.
Mid teens was when shit became tumultuous. Family quarrels, court cases, zero backing from any relatives at all. I was essentially a living, breathing proxy war medium between two sides of my family. Just couldn't afford to stay in Uni without support. Working that job to support myself however immediately conflicted with academics. Drained of resources and motivation, I just ended up living with a buddy and working as a bartender for some years, while gaming away my loneliness and ignoring my ambitions as they screamed at me to not let all this time go to waste.
I'm a weak-willed individual, but I like to think I'm not hopeless. Military service kind of jolted me back to life, reminding me that a little hardship goes a long way.
I think I can feel some of that good ol rush again - the desire to act, not ponder. I like it. Good feels for a change.
>>704458556 yea my best friend went off to military uni this september, from the stories he tells, it can be a lot of fun once you get used to the shitty lifestyle. Not for me though, i don't want to sleep in one room with men every night. If i wanted that i'd just go to prison.
he tells me most guys there are massive betas and he has easy time intimidating them. I guess that's how they wanna become men.
>Best friend's dad was local political fixer >Got me an invite to spend weekend at my US Senator's house to meet with and secure his nomination >Big house, bunch of other political types there too for fundraising, brown nosing, meet and greet stuff (think of post wedding activities from "Wedding Crashers") >Everything going great, he liked me, I got it made - yahoo! Blue Zoo here I come >Next day, another political shindig, meet girl, we start talking, and we hit it off >After lunch, she takes me to pool/guest house, fully stocked bar, we snag some beer, start playing some vidya. >Couple of beers later we're making out big time >Door opens up, rando group of people walks in and sees us, me with my hand down her pants, our shirts off >Girl turns out to be daughter of Senator's chief of staff - 10 minutes later, I'm escorted off the property by State Trooper
>>704452542 >be me at the age of 7 >dreaming of doing stuff with computers and have a nice gf in the future >11 years in the future >planning to study informatics >got the best gf one could have >be me now, pursuing my childhood dreams
Couldn't figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up so I just fucked around hanging out with friends and fucking girls. Took too long figuring out I want to be an actor. Live on the exact opposite side of the country from CA. Kicked out of mom's house. Living with a friend but have no job. Every time I apply to a job it makes me depressed that it's not a step towards school and it feels like there'll never be enough money to get where I want to be.
>>704460128 Yea that reminded me i also wanted to be a thug for a while. After several won drunken/sober fights and a bad reputation a guy who've had some prison tattoos broke my nose with a small headbutt. I needed that one. Changed my attitude.
>>704459336 Everyone get's stripped down and made equal but for some reason I was still treated as an outsider which was a bummer. Also I couldn't have spendt a whole year being pushed around by people the same age as me
My dream was to meet a seemingly nice girl with a magical pussy who would turn into a fat sow after a few years plus trick me into having a kid with her so I can't leave her even when if I should somehow unaddict myself from the sex. Didnt mean to persue this dream, just kind of happened anyway.
Wanted to be a scientist but later i knew i wasnt intelligent enough and the theoretical stuff is too boring for me also lived near abandoned train tracks where we played as kids plus modeltrains so doing something with trains and stuff was a second target now working for the biggest railway company in my country so im got something out of it
>>704452542 >What was your childhood dream? To design cars for a living >why didn't you pursue it? Lack of support from parents, mostly. I always wanted to design a Jaguar, but the parents just laughed at me constantly and kept telling me I should be an artist for Iron Maiden. No idea where to begin, no idea what I needed either skill or equipment wise. No internet back then either.
Eventually fell into forklift truck driving. I'm 33 now, and am strongly considering taking a welding class so I can learn how to make an off-road buggy.
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