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Anyone out there that can help a struggling /b/ro out? Ate my

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 210
Thread images: 18

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Anyone out there that can help a struggling /b/ro out? Ate my last pack of ramen noodles yesterday morning, which was the last bit of food i had left, and haven't had anything to eat since. I get my paycheck tomorrow so I'm just asking for a little something to hold me over until then. Willing to stick sharpie in pooper or whatever it takes.
>>
bumping for potential
>>
Go to your local food bank or church and simply ask.
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>>675682620
We do have a food bank here but they are only open on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday :(
>>
Talk to me bro, I'll help you out.
17652779670
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>>675682580
Thanks
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>>675682446
Here's how to get money fast
>get shitty jacket
>go to eBay
>put a bid on your jacket saying its art
>rich hipster fag buys it
>profit
>>
>>675682807
Sent ya a text
>>
Here Op i will give you a fail-proof trick to get you FREE food
Step 1)
>Go to a restaurant of your choice
Step 2)
>Examine the location and look for anyone eating alone.
Step 3)
>Approach said person and ask the following. "Would you like to see a magic trick?"
Step 4)
>If they reply yes, tell them that you are gonna attempt to read their mind.
Step 5)
>Now have them close their eyes and tell them to think of 7 vegetables that aren't purple.
Step 6)
>While they are unaware and too focused on the task, begin eating their food.
Step 7)
>Now tell them to open their eyes.
Step 8)
>You have now made their food disappear.
Step 9)
>Profit.
Step 10)
>Op wins.
>>
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>>675682818
>>675682446
Or better yet, write Yeezy on the tag and sell it for even more
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>>675682446
go to your local food shelter for a meal, or food pantry and they will set you up with a box of emergency food. It should hold you over for days
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>>675683845
Kek
>>
>>675683910
Like i said i would but they are only open on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday here :(
>>
>>675682446
are there fields nearby you?
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How about you get a job you worthless piece of shit
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>>675684286
he has a job, learn 2 read fegit
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>>675684286
I have a job you dick. I just moved into my own apartment 2 weeks ago and just having a little bit of a hard time.
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>>675684286
> I get my paycheck tomorrow
Being this much of an idiot
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>>675684150
Yes why?
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>>675684137
food pantry might be closed, but did you try the other? they should serve daily meals and be open daily. also, my city has several food pantries if one isn't open there's usually another one.
>>
It's one day you fucking faggot I've went 6 days without eating.
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>>675684735
steal some potatoes, carrots and shit. after that you can cook something with it.
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>>675684782
We only have one here. I live in a pretty small town. Idk about going to any churches though cause i don't even go to church.
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>>675684907
With all the rednecks that live around me they would probably shoot my ass if i tried that lol.
>>
If you really want/need food, you can try this:

>Make reservations for two at Olive Garden
>Go to Olive Garden
>Act like you are meeting a date
>Eat bread sticks while waiting for date
>She has not yet shown up
>Whenever waiters come over, just say you are waiting for your date to show before you order
>After 30 minutes of periodically checking your phone, leave looking depressed
>Be sad you got fake stood up, but happy cause you just grubbed on some dope af breadsticks
>>
I'm feeling peckish think I'll make a couple of bacon sandwiches I've only had two sausage and one bacon sarnie and a lasagne all day,
>>
OP knock on someone door in your neighbourhood who is someone that you greet a ton or are just nice to.
Eg. that elderly guy who walks his dogs 24/7

The elderly are happy to help others, they know and have been through the struggle of life.

tl;dr find some wise person who you respect and who respects you
>>
>>675685552
The closet olive garden to me is like 40 miles away lol
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>>675685880
I only moved in 2 weeks ago so i haven't met anyone yet =/
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>>675682446
I had a greek salad and a steak fried in onions and green peppers, it was pretty good
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>>675685696
>>
OP should stop being a fag. Instead of asking fucking forum goers who live on the opposite side of the planet, ask your neighbour and buy him lunch when you get your paycheck.
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>>675684286
Horray for autism!
>>
>>675686260
This
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>>675686099
>>
Somebody buy this tramp a pizza, fling a dog a bone.
>>
Make friends with your neighbour or starve. Asking for food is humbling.
>>
kill a human and eat its flesh
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>>675686606
thisssss
>>
I'm having pepperoni pizza with stuffed crust and a beer
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eat your leg
>>
>>675686260
I just moved in 2 weeks ago so i haven't met anyone yet. Plus it's not like i don't plan on paying it forward if someone helps me out. I wouldn't have a problem buying a bro a pizza or something if they really needed it and i had the extra cash.
>>
>>675685890
Olive Garden can be replaced with any other sub-par chain restaurant in you area
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>>675686745
Sounds delicious asshole.
>>
>>675686839
Beat up an elderly person for their wallet and then buy you food
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eat your cum, it has 2 grams of protein so you should be fine
>>
Potential
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>>675687098
>>675687189
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>>675687351
reaaaaal legit suggestions
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post a picture of you fridge please
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>>675684286
I agree with this guy, get another job and quickly, you lazy piece of shit.
>>
>>675686914
Yeah, try something like red lobster or some italian place. Italians have the best bread ever, abd the oil is delicious.
>>
If you only had a pussy op you be stuffing your face bro.
>>
Buy etherum wait for it to become as valuable as bit coin, cash out don't report the income profi
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>>675687557
That's a good idea I mean it's not like he could empty it first.
>>
show us your new home
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>>675687675
Well I'm gay so I'm good
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>>675686839
Seriously, man. Just go to the house next door, introduce yourself, like that you're the guy that just moved in and shit, and ask for a little help. Of course promise that you'll pay back and everything, but in your case you just can't be afraid to ask, man.
>>
>>675687189
eat cum for at least 8 weeks your hair will have that fresh Labrador look
>>
I'd buy you a pizza but I'm a tramp and live in the uk so I can't but my hearts in the right place.
>>
>>675687848
aks a neighbour if you could borrow some rice cuz u have no one left
>>
I ate my steering wheel once before. Just gotta boil the plastic is all
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>>675686839
Knock on your neighbours door in a non-begging way and introduce yourself+ ask if you can take a seat. Explain your situation, and say how you're happy with even sandwiches to get you by.

Offer to pay them forward as well. They'll be happy to help.

So "Hi there, I'm _______. I moved into apartment ______ 2 weeks ago, and I'm your new neighbour." Compliment them on anything you know them for or even just say how nice their coat or some shit looks. Ask them if you can come inside and then be honest. "Usually I'm not one to beg, but I had to sorta swallow my pride today. *explains situation* *offers to buy them lunch next week*
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>>675688109
Thanks anyways bro
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>>675687557

THIS!!!!
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>>675687930
There is all sorts of fun stuff you can eat as a gay man.
>>
You're a homo, no pizza for you cock jockey starve you sinner.
>>
fridge picture, do it anon
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>>675688444
checked
>>
>>675687949
Or do this now, but so not ask for food, instead become good friends with your neighbour/neighboursover a period of time, make sure they know you are having some troubles with money/food. Then next time something like this happens you have a fool proof thing to fall back on later on.

Or kill and eat them.
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>>675687930
You're gay why don't you just suck some d for cash?
>>
Wish I could help but I live in my car in Denver, and we had 3 feet of snow last night. Cold as fuck and quite hungry too.
>>
Parents, friends, anyone you know can't help you out? You can have money transferred to your account instantly
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>>675687557
Do this with the same paper u wrote date on.. and I will order you a pizza and have it delivered. Large!
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Sharpie in pooper time stamp then we talk
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>>675688837
Don't be a dick and do the right thing if he does it order him a munch.
>>
sharpie in pooper
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>>675688837
4 real? I don't think they deliver as far out as i live though. But If you seriously will get me a pizza i can go pick up i will post a pic. Nothing but jugs of water in my fridge.
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>>675688837
Hello.... I'm serious.. I will have pizza delivered.
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serious m8?
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Every option you guys give the OP he has a reason why it wont work and that he would rather have money. I wouldnt send any fag here money. Ever. I would however send them a pizza and wings with a couple bevys. But not without indisputable evidence that i was indeed helping out a poor fag.
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>>675683663
>>
If you're in the 416 I can help you make some fast cash
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>>675689405

This. I've ordered people on here food a few times.
>>
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>>675689405
I would do it anyway to show my superior wealth even if he wasn't a hobo.
>>
>>675689162
I will.. I will help out for 20 bucks... not being a dick but 20 is something I can spare for a guy that can't eat. As long as he is in the USA
>>
Post photo of fridge and write OP is grateful on the same page and you'll get the pizza.
>>
>>675689405
To be fair the options where a bit fucked up.
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>>675689711
7/11 speaks the truth
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>>675689405
>>675689306
>>675688837
>>675688576
Here is a pic. Nothing but jugs of water and some condiments
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>>675689685
Proud of you bro, I'm in the uk or I would get him a munch.
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>>675689972
>>
>>675689972
ewww he's a miracle whip faggot unsubscribe
>>
>>675689972

I want to see the same original paper with the date. Hold that in fridge.. I will send pizza
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>>675689685
I do live in the US
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>>675690224
I posted pic with orginal paper
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>>675688235
Kek
>>
Op delivered. Anon delivar (uk fag here so limited ability to delivar anything more useful than this)
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>>675690086
Okay.. give me the pizza shop and I will order
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>>675685696
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The cock sucker did as asked order the homo a pizza with extra cheese the way he likes it.
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>>675690224
Not Op, but I do believe that's the same envelope as in the op.
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No.
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>>675690369
Okay I am ready to call..
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>>675682807
Purdue area code i may k ow you
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>>675690713
You can order from the pizza hut at 315 Lane Pkwy, Shelbyville, TN 37160
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>>675690208
How do I upvote this one kek?
>>
>>675690713
You need his local store number, and op phone n make sure there is a paid order in your name before walking for fuck all bro.
>>
>>675690666
nice satan trips

PBR still sucks though you fucking hipster
>>
>>675690860
Email me ur ...

[email protected]
>>
Just sent one large pineapple pizza no suace no cheese to Purdue address, but accidently clicked cash so just say it's on anon, they'll understand
>>
>>675682446

OPfag actually begging for weed.
>>
Well /b/ros, this has been a productive thread. OP, I bid you farewell and good luck in the future with finances. Continue to work hard, and make some damn friends
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>>675691355
Pmsl you twisted little fucker.
>>
>>675691182
Sent you an email
>>
"> be me hungry as fuck
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>>675691393
I never asked for cash
>>
I wanna know if anybody helps this starving little prick.
>>
>>675682446
It's only 2 days without food you massive faggot.
>>
eat the sauceeee
>>675689972
>>
>>675691771
I've emailed an anon that asked me too but still waiting to hear back =/
>>
>>675684286
>What's a reading comprehension?
>>
Let us know if you get sorted op.
>>
>>675682768
go to a church a Catholic or Christian church.
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>>675692043
I emailed back.. just trying to figure out what name
>>
run into a police station and yell "allahu akbar" they can feed you free bullets
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>>675692043
I wouldn't hold your breath for some reason these dicks like too talk shit, move to the uk we would sort you out, fuck if I had money for a laugh ad send a hooker with a pizza lol.
>>
Op, let me tell you what I used to do. It's very easy to just go into a large chain grocery store (any store works but don't fuck over small businesses) and steal some pocketable food. Cans of seafood, etc, anything small but nourishing. Wear a coat and stick it in your coat pocket. Food products don't have magnetic strips to set off door alarms so just make sure nobody eye witnesses you stealing and you're perfectly fine.
>>
>>675691771
>>675692193
It's all good. Got an anon that is helping me out (:
>>
I'd like to see where this goes.
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>>675692945
Good proud a the cunt, if you get a pizza open a bread n post pic a the fucker before demolishing it.
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>>675688729
That sucks bro, stay safe and warm.
>>
how is OP?
>>
I'm horny can somebody send me a high class hooker ?
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>>675693171
>>675693248
I'll make new thread once i get the pizza
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>>675693703
OP died
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>>675693819
Rip op, cancel that pizza order a casket.
>>
>>675692472
They won't let me pay over.the phone
>>
>>675682446
WTH just don't eat for a day. I did that for 10 days once, no big deal
>>
>>675693796
Did you make sure there's a delivery paid for in your name before sitting foaming at the mouth waiting n fuck all arrives.
>>
>>675694077
I did 7 no way you fucking outlasted me cunto.
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>>675694034
Internet order anon
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>>675694333
Last days I was on amphetamines though, probably wouldn't have done it if that wasn't the case
>>
>>675694034
You're a dick, why get his hopes up his wee belly rumbling choking for a munch.
>>
>>675694171
>>675694352
Yea anon couldn't order over phone at that pizza hut. He is going to try a dominoes near me. I suggested ordering online also if they don't let you pay over phone either.
>>
a man can die if he doesn't eat food for like 7 days.
>>
>>675694333
Witnessed
>>
>>675685139
If you don't go to a church, don't sweat it. Avoid mormon churches and houses of worship, but any other church would practically be designed for the poor or the heathen (religious fag here). Like others have said, a Catholic or Christian church will do. As long as at least one person is there, they'll help you out. If you want bonus points, tell them you're homeless (even if you aren't). I've worked with the homeless in the church before, and the new ones are always fearful.
>>
>>675694594
Dominos should they do here anyway.
>>
>>675694594
Good luck anon
>>
go beg at a street corner near a supermarket for an hour. then go eat some fast food. easy peasy.
>>
go to a shop, explain how you are having a hard time and they might be able to give you some close to expiry date food. good luck OP
>>
>>675688702
Cuz that's not OP.
>>
>>675695111
Why would trips lie?
>>
>>675694812
It's all good now bro. I got a nice anon that is helping me out and ordering me a pizza. I've only been in a situation like this a couple of times though. It's not something that happens often. Just been a rough month since i just moved to a new place and everything.
>>
>>675694034
I ordered..it... 15 mind it be ready. I ordered him a little extras >>675694583
>>
You get anything yet OP?
Gimme a pic with paypal and I'll help out. Match the OP picture.
>>
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I have nothing in my fridge. Please send pizza
>>
>>675695416
Seriously ? You're a top lad nice one anon.
>>
>>675695416
He'll suck yer dick for yer generosity.
>>
>>675695416
Good work anon
Faith in humanity +1
>>
>>675695606
Yeah I did... I ordered him a few extras..
>>
>>675695606
>>675695417
I have called and confirmed that anon did place the order (: Even got me some cheesy bread and a coke.
>>
>>675695416
inb4 trolled and left high and dry or high and staved.
>>
>>675695861
Excellent he's a top banana.
>>
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>>675689972
>>
>>675695861
That's awesome.
Glad to hear it. Best of luck man.

I just got paid so I would have tossed you a few bucks if he was bullshitting you. Plus I'm a bit drunk and pretty high on meth, so I'm feeling pretty empathetic.

Do me a favor, post the food when it gets there.
>>
>>675695416
Great! Seriously God bless you and OP!
>>
>>675696034
Pmsl brilliant only on 4chan can you find a kind hearted drunk meth head willing to buy you a pizza, fucking love it.
>>
>>675696271
Funny shit
>>
Yeah nice one anon who bought the pizza, good on ye bro.
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>>675696034
Going to get pizza now. I'll make new bread with pics when i get back.
>>
>>675696271
I'm generally kind-hearted. I just happen to be high on meth and a bit tipsy.
I came into a good job recently, and I very much recall what it's like to be broke and hungry. I don't mind helping out when I can.

Besides, 4chan is the best place to do it. You know there's no hidden motive; no recognition to gain. Just one anonymous person helping another. It's refreshing. Kind of like this hit I'm about to take.

>>675696629
nah I'm too lazy to keep searching. you have a bit under 150 replies left in this thread, I'll entertain people with my bad choices until you get back.
>>
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Thanks guys this really means alot. Love you /b/ro's!! :D
>>
You guys are ok don't go to dominos pizza I've fooled an anon into picking up an order but I'm really gonna stab him to death outside the store :)
>>
>>675696948
Not op.
Yer gey.
>>
>>675682446
>suck 20 cocks on craigslist
>stomach full of jizz
>will last you to tomorrow
>>
>>675696948
timestamp pleaseee
>>
>>675696912
I'm the same bro if I could help somebody ad do it, wouldn't see cunts going without if I could help em out.
>>
>>675696948
this is not op
>>
>>675697163
Just curious (totally not gay or anything hahah)
Can you actually survive on jizz hahaha no homo!
>>
>>675696948
Fake and Gay, gtfo not op
>>
new thread?
>>
I'd rather see a pizza bought for a starving wee cunt than some cheap skank getting fed for showing her tiddys.
>>
I need money for a nazi uprising, I have talked with Putin, and we're launching soon. So, everyone not supporting us, gets one free nuke to their knee.
Our top secret paypal is:
[email protected]

Remember
Hitler did nothing wrong
>>
>>675697527
>168 replies
really nigga?
>>
>>675697178
This: >>675696629 is OP.
This: >>675696948 is a faggot.

Look at the timestamps.
Unless the pizza place is directly above his apt, you can assume that guy is bullshitting with dicks in and around his mouth.

>>675697251
Yup. Cigarettes are another thing. I'll be downtown with friends and someone will ask me for a cigarette. Depending on my observation, usually I'll give it to them. Being without cigarettes suck.
I say depending on my observation, because I've had hippie faggots come up to me, with a pack of cigarettes sticking out of their shirt pocket and ask me for a smoke.
>>
>>675696948
That's not what I ordered him. Nice try though
>>
found image source
http://pizzaaa.com/2014/09/06/pizza-party-dominosinstalovesooogoodpizzapartycokefoodieinstafoodcakeguwahati/
>>
>>675683663
Top Kek
>>
>>675695861
This is what I ordered. Not the picture
>>
>>675697696
Oh, I forgot the 2nd part. My buddies will always be like "you're way too nice, just tell them to fuck off". Fuck I need to take a break..
>>
Drunk methhead with a Heart ... Great! Was drug addicted and Homeless once.. No food for 3 Days. Then an random Grandma gave me a pizza nad 2 T-Shirts. Best Day of my life. Always remember: what goes around comes around
>>
>>675696948
you are a faggot
>>
>>675682446
What is dumpster diving?
Faggot...you wouldnt last one day as homeless
>>
>>675697696
Fuck I'm Scottish you can't walk in town without cunts tapping ciggies off you asking for a pound for a can a lager or Romanian gypsies chasing you with a sign begging for cash lol
>>
>>675697725
Lets be honest, it was a shit attempt
>>
>>675697910
>>675696948
gey as fuck
>>
>>675697996
Just remember, Lahey... What goes around is all around.

>>675698083
I imagine you can tell the ones who need it and the ones who are just leaching cunts though, right?

>>675697996
Lol dunno why people keep pointing out the drunk meth head part. Just a guy who's been on the other end.
>>
>>675698083
I'm Aussie so I can't go 6 fucking steps without an abo cunt asking for a dollar or a cig
>>
>>675698143
Yeah but this is /b where most fall for the bs. Lmao
>>
>>675698314
Fuck I don't mind if their rattling n I've got enough I'll usually take pity on them even if I know their spending it on drink or smack, fuck the Romanians though there a fuckinng pest here millions of them begging for organised gangs.
>>
>>675682446
If you own any leather shoes or boots or belts you can cook them and eat them in a pinch. Genuine leather contains proteins and will sustain you
>>
>>675698396
a mate of mine went to aussie last year one abo asked for a smoke he gave him one then like 20 of the cunts just appeard out of no were he just drop the pack a left
>>
>>675698620
I'm not too familiar with the people over there.
I'm from Canada.

Sometimes in CS:GO I'll get jammed into a random Euro server, but honestly every single time I have, even though my lag was awful, they're the nicest people I've met.
I think so far it's been swedish, scottish, and finns. All super nice.
>>
It's good that op got a munch shouted, you ain't all edgy heartless little bastards after all.
>>
>>675698837
But the chemicals used to prep the leather will still be in the leather
>>
I bought some old dude begging for food $20 worth of swanson microwave meals coke and hotdog wieners. On my way to work at 4 am I saw same asshole stumbling around drunk outside of my building the next day.

I helped a "friend" get back on his feet, letting him live on my couch and feeding him for 2 months, he left a mess and stole my laptop and ipad and vanished.

Some crackwhore was begging me for money in a mcd's once, i was baked so I offered to buy her a meal, she spat in my face.

I fell on hard times due to an injury and shit insurance.I didn't drink or smoke for 4 months, asked my boss for extra shifts, utilized my good credit for a low interest loan and ate chickpeas and home baked bread or sphagetti when I could afford ground beef. I thought about those people who I had tried to help and realized that I didn't help them one fucking bit. They will never claw their way back to being functional if people like me support their shitty lifestyles with handouts. Government intervention and rehabilitation are what they need, i pay for that with my tax dollars which total %30 of my paycheque.

All that cynicism later I am happy someone bought op a pizza, I am just more hopeful that op makes it and can pass on the favor some day.
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