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Best of 4chan thread! GreenText edition! post your favorite

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 213
Thread images: 151

File: EB Feels greentext.png (345KB, 1632x4644px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Best of 4chan thread!
GreenText edition! post your favorite greentexts in here!

I'll start with a classic
>>
Can someone post the greetext from yesterday about a guy who forced a 4/10 to fuck and blow him? It 404'd before i could see the pics
>>
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This is my all time favourite
>>
Anyone got the one that just happened about the dude fuckin' his former friend's sister?
>>
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>>560045646
this?
>>
Anyone got the Loli foot job story?
>>
>>560046240
Fucking loved this one.
>>
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>>
>>560046240

That's the one! Thanks. Also...Tits
>>
>>560044416

Jesus, that was really sad. I'll drink a toast to that guy.
>>
>>560046534
it was fuckin awesome
>>
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>>560046630
wtf happened
>>
Anyone got the greentext about the guy getting a handy in a hot tub on a cruise?
>>
a long read, but its worth it
>>
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Dumpan. 1/?
>>
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2/?
>>
3/?
>>
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4/?
>>
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5/?
>>
6/?
>>
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7/?
>>
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8/?
>>
9/?
>>
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10/?
>>
>>560046701
ayyyyy lmao
>>
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11/?
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12/?
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13/?
>>
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14/?
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15/?
>>
16/?
>>
Most of /b/ now don't remember the song
>>
17/?
>>
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18/?
>>
19/?
>>
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20/?
>>
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21/?
>>
22/?
>>
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>>560046240
>>
23/?
>>
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>>
>>560047829
anyone have that with just text so I can show it to someone without them knowing i come to this shithole?
>>
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24/?
>>
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25/?
>>
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>>560044416
>I start with a classic
>5 months old
Anyways newfriend...I like this one makes me laugh every time.
You guys know the tales of the tards?
>>
these are from 5/20/14
not mine but hot

#post 1
i had a psycho of a girlfriend a few years back that i wanted rid of. she was the type to say she would kill herself if i tried to break up with her. she was essentially holding me hostage. i didnt want her to hurt herself but at the same time as a relationship we were done. one day i calmly explained all this to her (instead of screaming it at her while fighting) and she just starts crying and says please dont leave me ill do anything you want. i asked her if she was sure about that. she said she was. i told her i would think about it and we would talk about this again in the morning (we were living together at this point). i figured i would use this to get various things i wanted from her and then make her want to leave me so i didnt have to deal with the whole ill kill myself thing. ill greentxt various things i had her do but nothing is pretyped.
#post 2
>next day
>ask her if she was sure she would do ANYTHING
>she said yes absolutely. i love you etc.
>tell her ok then there will be some serious changes

>from now on anytime anywhere i want any type of sex she will do it without hesitation

>she will be given tasks from time to time to complete

>failure to do these things means that you no longer want to be with me and you will leave

>are you willing to accept these terms?

>what do you want me to do?

>doesnt matter. anything i want. you will either agree or we are done. which is it?

>she is in tears at this point but when she sees im serious she reluctantly agrees
>>
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26/?
>>
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27/?
>>
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28/?
>>
>>560049665
want mor?
>>
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>>
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30/?

I'm taking a break for now.
>>
>>560049516
type it out yourself, you lazy faggot
>>
>>560044416
EB you fucking glorious bastard
>>
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>>560050275
kek
>>
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alright guys, if you like wincest heres a LONG one,.
>>
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/tg/ gold
>>
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just bumping ocassionally with random shit in hopes the thread doesnt die before that guy who was dumping come sback
>>
>>
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>>560051574
kek
filename
>>
>>560044416
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. What a rough life
>>
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>>560051574
>>
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>>560051925
>>
>>560049516
Just add a watermark and lower resolution and say you found it on 9gag.
>>
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>>
>>560044416
Fuck man, that left a hole in my heart.
>>
LOOKING FOR COMBOS

HEY GUIISE

GUISE.. HEY HEY GUISE

SERIOUSLY I'm looking for combo pics.. does anyone have any individual pics I'll take screenshots of completed ones if that's all you have though.

Serioiusly been looking all over the place hook it up!
>>
>>560044416
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1KvjPwwYXYNMopylbhQNl5e3_UFvV8qP_We72xWYCmao/edit?pli=1#

400-Page-Greentext-novel.

Second story is being told on a 2 day rhythm on /r9k

You wont regret reading this.
>>
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Bump
>>
>>560049807
keep going faggot
>>
>>560047980
holy shit, lost so hard
>>
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saved this gem when i was in the thread
>>
>>560044416
What a pointless green text. shit/10
>>
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>>560049286

this...what a story
>>
>>560053281
This isn't YLYL.
>>
>>560046240
Lost my shit at super strength pot
>>
>>560052271
kek
>>
amazed how this hasnt 404'd yet
>>
>>560049506
what the fuck lol, I don't believe it
>>
Thank you anons, this material will surely keep me entertained all weekend.
>>
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Can somebody post the story of the guy doing shrooms in high school and masturbating in the woods?
>>
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From /int/
>>
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>>
Thanks for sharing, faggots

>bump
>>
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>>560055927
Fund it!
>>
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>>560048031
Do you or does anyone have the rest of this masterpiece?
>>
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>>
>>560047829
http://ultronbrowser.info/
THIS.ITSHAPPENING.
>>
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>>560057296
>>
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>>
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>>
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>>560057096
>>
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>>
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>>560057224
this is the best thing evar
>>
Dear diary:
Today /b/ did not disappoint.
>>
Emergency bump! Keep this shit going!
>>
b-b-bump!
>>
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>>560059919
>>
>>560061628
I was in that thread. That shit was intense. Not sure if that soldier is actually the deserter though.
>>
>>560049807
yes please
>>
>>560062158
>Not sure if that soldier is actually the deserter though.
Derp, I mean the missing soldier in that report.
>>
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>>560061628

i am the strielok
>>
Bumperino
>>
Alright, faggots, I'm back

31/?
>>
32/?
>>
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33/?
>>
34/?
>>
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35/?
>>
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36/?
>>
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>>
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>>560063852
This was 37/?, whoops

38/?
>>
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39/?
>>
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40/?
>>
>>560063910
you da real mvp in here
>>
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41/?
>>
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42/?
>>
>>560064017
Post 100 and I will get a tattoo saying 6M0dPqHh in green.
>>
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43/?
>>
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>>560064125
>>
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>>560064125
Be ready to deliver.

44/?
>>
45/?
>>
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46/?
>>
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47/?
>>
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>>
48/?
>>
49/?
>>
>>560064326
Nah, I'm actually full of shit. Keep posting though.
>>
50/?
>>
>>560064658
>>
51/?
>>
52/?
>>
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53/?
>>
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54/?
>>
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55/?

This one's a three-parter.
>>
(1/?)
>ala-aste
>2000-luvun alku, meno vitun dippi :D (inb4 -94 jonne)
>samassa koulussa kehitysvammaisten osasto, jossa noin 15-19 vuotiaita vammasia
>vammaset ovat rakentaneet hienon ja suuren lumilinnan mihin he majoittuvat aina välituntisin
>mietimme miten ali-ihmiset ovat voineet rakentaa jotain niin hienoa
>5-luokkalaiset kummioppilaamme eivät diilaa tämän kanssa
>muodostamme vastarintaliikkeen vammasten sortovaltaa vastaan
>La resistance lives on saatana!
>annoimme liikkeellemme nimeksi "Helvetin perkeleet"
>Helvetin perkeleiden ensimmäinen salakokous pidetään koulumme metsässä, suuren männyn ja nokkoskivikon luona (siinä kasvaa kesäisin vitusti nokkosia)
>kokoukseen ilmautui kaikki 5-luokan pojat, sekä minun lisäksi kolme muuta ekaluokkalaista
>>
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56/?
>>
>>560049665
>>560049807
>>560062254
>>560053217


>>>>>>>>560049506
>>
>>560065169
(2/?)
>sovimme, että hyökkäämme jo ensi välkällä vammasten kimppuun ilman sodanjulistusta, ja levitämme sanaa eteenpäin Helvetin perkeleistä
>välitunti koittaa
>hyökkäämme metsästä kepein ja lumi(kivi)palloin varustettuina yllätys momentin turvin
>vammaset eivät tajua heti tilannetta (ylläri:D:D??)
>mutta kun tajuavat, taivas putoaa niskaan
>2-metriset (aspect of the 130cm 1st grader) kuolaavat hulk vammaset tulevat karjuen ja apinan raivolla ulos linnasta ja hyökkäävät
>>
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57/?
>>
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58/?
>>
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59/?
>>
>>560065290
(3/?)
>tässä kohtaa rivimme hajoavat ylivoiman edessä ja joudumme pakenemaan takaisin metsään
>onneksi näiden teini-ikäisten mutantti ninjojen motoriikka oli sen verran alikehittynyttä, että eivät juoksussa edes minulle pärjänneet
>pääsimme kaikki turvaan, ja saimme aikaan pienehkön reiän linnan seinään. se voidaan laskea jo voitoksi
>sana Helvetin perkeleiden urotyöstä leviää kulovalkean lailla
>seuraavan päivän ruokavälkälle sovittu uusi salakokous, jossa värväämme uusia sotilaita, ja organisoimme vastarintaliikkeen toimintaa ja laadimme sotastrategiaa
>jäsenmäärämme lähes kolminkertaistui, ja saimme partisaaneja kaikilta luokilta, jopa muutama 6-luokkalaista
>jaoimme taistelu roolit luokkien mukaan, esimerkiksi meille ekaluokkalaisille lankesi paskimmat duunit
>olimme "pikku-pioneereja"
>tehtävämme oli kaivaa juoksuhautoja vihollislinjojen lähelle, sekä tunkeutua linnaan eturintaman sotilaiden (3-4-luokkalaiset)tekemistä rei'istä, ja tuhota linnaa sisältä päin
>5-6-luokkalaiset toimivat upseereinä (heittelivät vammasia kivillä ja huutelivat ohjeita)
>meidän tehtävä oli ylivoimaisesti vaarallisin, sillä huhuttiin että jos jäi vangiksi, vammaset pussaavat ja imevät pallia, ja että vammasten purema muuttaa uhrin myöskin vammaseksi
>toinen hyökkäys toteutettaisiin keskiviikkona toisen välitunnin sarastaessa
>keskiviikko
>ennen hyökkäystä kokoonumme Helvetin perkeleiden päämajaan ja vannomme valan
>varmoina voitosta käymme taistoon
>suureksi yllätykseksemme vammaset ovat valmistautuneet hyökkäykseemme, he ovat saaneet riveihinsä lisää vammasia, ja he ovat myöskin aseistautuneet kepein lumi(kivi)palloin
>emme silti peräänny
>eturintaman sotilaat saavat murrettua kohtalaisen ison aukon linnan seinämään
>me pioneerit ryntäämme sisään, mutta joudumme kuitenkin nopeasti vetäytymään kun nämä korstot vetävät taas hulk-modet
>>
60/?

Taking another break. Hopefully, this thread'll still be here when I get back.
>>
>>560064648
bump
>>
>>560065493
(4/4)
>koulun isoin vammanen ehtii kumminkin napata 2-luokkalaisen jontun syleilyynsä
>en voi jäädä auttamaan
>Helvetin perkeleet joutuu taas vetäytymään metsään, kun vammaset alkavat jyräämään
>erilaisia variaatoita tarinasta, mitä vammaset tekivät jontulle liikkuu varmaan koulussa edelleenkin, mutta joka tapauksessa kaikki koulun oppilaat säälivät häntä, ja kohtelivat häntä koko ala-asteen kuin sotaveteraania joka oli menettänyt raajansa ja näkönsä sinappikaasu hyökkäyksessä
>sovimme hätäkokouksen ruokavälkälle
>Helvetin perkeleiden kolmas kokous
>erityisluokan pärinä-eerot haluavat liittyä vastarintaliikkeeseemme
>riemu on korkealla, sillä pärinä-eeroilla legendaarinen maine koulussamme lukuisien tihutöiden ansiosta
>organisoimme nyt liikkeemme uudelleen kolmeen divisioonaan
>5-6lk. elitekorps
>1-4lk. muukalaislegioona
>pärinä-eerot. duudsonit
>sovimme perjantain ruokavälkälle suur-hyökkäyksen, missä hyökkäämme tällä kertaa kolmesta suunnasta ja tuhoamme koko paskan
>perjantai
>asemiin
>hyökkäykseen
>ei vittu, party boopers! (välkkä valvojat)
>vammaset ovat kannelleet opettajille
>joudumme kaikki jälki-istuntoon, ja liikkeemme lopetetaan, vai lopetetaanko?
>perjantai aamutunti
>"pidämme kummioppilaiden kanssa ulkoilutunnin" ilmoitti opettaja matikainen
>päättäväisesti marssimme kummiemme kanssa vammasten luokkahuoneen ikkunalle ja koputimme pari kertaa, ja lähdimme juoksemaan kohti lumilinnaa
>17-vuotta pitkän elämäni aikana en ole kokenut mitään niin hauskaa kuin ne noin 20:tä vammasta liimautuneena luokan ikkunaan, ja heidän priceless ilmeensä kun potkimme heidän upean linnansa paskaksi
>me olimme Helvetin perkeleet.
>>
>>560064363
Combo
>>
>>560065531
YOU DA REAL MVP
>>
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>>560065493
go back to pic related you fucking spic
>>
>>560065531
Man love you. /nohomo
>>
>>560065290
finnbro please go
>>
how come no one's posted this yet?
>>
>>560046630
you saved the thumbnail you nigger
>>
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>>
bumping for moar
>>
>>560063464
God damn nice collection
>>
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trying to keep the thread alive
>>
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>>
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MOAR
>>
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Opposite of pic related, this is the best thread in the world.
>>
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no no this thread won't won't fall
>>
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>>
>>560044416
I was in that thread.

I also have pics of them. Can't upload cuz on phone.
>>
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>>
Hey, it's me again.

61/?
>>
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62/?
>>
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63/?
>>
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64/?
>>
>>560069507
thank goodness!
>>
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65/?
>>
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66/?
>>
>>560057427
dat file name
>>
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67/?
>>
68/?
>>
69/?
>>
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>>560070152
Whoops, that was 70/?

71/?
>>
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72/?
>>
73/?
>>
74/?
>>
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75/?
>>
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76/?
>>
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77/?
>>
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78/?
>>
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79/?
>>
just make an archive with all this stuff
>>
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80/?
>>
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81/?
>>
>>560048954
This song is what brought me to /b/
>>
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82/?
>>
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83/?
>>
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84/?
>>
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85/?
>>
This one has, like, 11 parts for whatever reason. Forgive me, that's just the way I had them saved.
>>
87/?
>>
88/?
>>
89/?
>>
90/?
>>
>>560059513
10/10 if real
>>
We reached the image limit!
>>
>>560071834
nice stuff anon.
>>
>>560047925
damn.
Thread posts: 213
Thread images: 151


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