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AYO HOL UP.... >*barks at literally nothing for several hours*

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Thread replies: 45
Thread images: 12

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AYO HOL UP....
>*barks at literally nothing for several hours*
....LEMME GET DIS STRAIT.....
>*attacks toddler unprovoked*
.....YOU BE SAYIN...LIKE....
>*vomits unidentifiable bile on carpet*
...WE WUZ....SUM...
>*farts rancid corpse gas*
....SUM FINNA....
>*kills neighbours cat*
....LIKE...SUM FINNA.....
*tears brand new $7000 mattress to pieces*
.....WE WUZ SUM.....
>*consistently stinks like putrid shit*
....MANS BEST FRIIIIIIIEEEEEEENNNNNNNNN-
>*gets hit by car*
>>
Can't you fags just take one day off a year?
>>
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AYO HOL UP....
>*Spreads toxoplasmoisis*
...LEMME GET DIS STRAIGHT
>*Destroys the eco-system and massacres the bird population*
.....YOU BE SAYIN LIKE....
>*Tears furniture*
....WE WUZ SUM.....
>*Sleeps on the counter*
SUM FINNA
>*Sits on your face at night*
LIKE SUM FINNA
>*Jumps around the room breaking furniture*
WE WUZ SUM
>*Pukes out hairball*
....ASSHOLE-
>*Gets killed by neighbour's dog/Goes missing*
>>
>>2286703
>goes missing
Kek'd
>>
>>2286703
>>2286669
Please do a Pitbull version
>>
>>2286703
none of these happen except hairball like one every 6 months and i have 2 cats
>>
>>2286802
This, but for the musician.
>>
>>2286703
Bird population is the same as it's always been. No one does any research before posting. Not one of have even researched toxo and the main way it's transmitted.
>>
>>2286669
Dogfags BTFO
>>
>>2287370
I wrote a horror story about toxo and had a veterinarian confirm that it is far fetched but not an exaggeration of the condition to have the victim masturbate furiously over a filthy litter box then feed pieces of himself to his cats before committing suicide.
I love cats and dogs but toxo is something so out there it is hard to believe.
>>
>>2287378
I don't think you truly know what toxo is and what it does.
>>
>>2286703
Top kek
>>
>>2287378
>veterinarian
>tinfoil hat hobo I found in an alley
>>
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>>2286669
>>2286703
my fucking sides
>>
>>2286703
None of those are that bad though
>>
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>>2286669
The only people that hate dogs this much are Muslims.

Wouldn't be surprised if this guy "Allahu Snackbared" himself in a few days.
>>
>>2287476
All brown people hate all animals
>>
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>>2286703
>*Spreads toxoplasmoisis*

If you're really careful with sanitation (I'm talking disinfectant wipes, hand sanitizer, anti bacterial soap, individual dog shit bags), you can virtually eliminate the chances of suffering from toxo p

>*Destroys the eco-system and massacres the bird population*

Out door cats and owners should incur harsh penalties. I count it as animal abuse: letting a cat run wild is dangerous and irresponsible.

>*Tears furniture*

My cat has never once torn at my furniture. I provide him with ample scratching posts of different kinds, and trim his nails every two days

>>*Sleeps on the counter*

This is true: cats feel as if they are allowed to go anywhere in your house, kitchen counters be dammed. While I haven't quite figured out how to fully prevent him from counter surfing, the best I can do is tastelessly barricade parts of my counters to prevent access, then completely wipe down my counters and cooking areas with disinfectant wipes before and after use, in case he somehow bypassed the barricade when I'm not home.

>*Sits on your face at night*

Cats enjoy sitting on or near faces at night because they're the only warm, exposed parts of its owner's body, and it wants to cuddle up. Believe it or not, cats do enjoy human companionship from time to time (although not nearly on the level of a dog.) At other times, they are very independent, and do their own thing. If you can mold your cat around what kind of affection you're expecting from your pets, a cat can be a positive thing in someone's life.
>>
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>*Jumps around the room breaking furniture*

Cats that go crazy like that suffer from one distinct thing: a lazy owner. An hour of hardcore play time every day with feathers on a stick, in which your cat is thoroughly exhausted means your can't won't have the energy to terrorize your home. And no, sitting and watching TV while petting your cat is not play time. We understand when dogs require exercise, yet give scorn and epithets to cats when we coop them up for the entire work day and then demand they be docile when you get home. It's insane.

>*Pukes out hairball*

I constantly brush my cats hair. It's a part of our daily routine. I find that by doing this, and also using special food/treats, you can totally prevent hairballs. Plus I trained him to hack them up in his litter box for minimal clean up.

>>*Gets killed by neighbour's dog/Goes missing*

Again letting a cat out unsupervised is truly retarded, and needs to be stopped. I do realize that a life indoors is no life at all, and that's why I've trained my cat to walk with me on a leash. I take him out for daily walks so he can explore the world, while I safely contain him. He also has an iron clad recall, and I can call for him to hop on my shoulder with a snap of my fingers if we're out walking and we cross a dog also walking on a leash.
>>
>>2286703
>goes missing

OVER THE LINE
>>
>>2287518
>a clean and decent cat owner
Kudos, you are a rare and wonderful breed.

For the counters, I put doublesided tape on top of cheap placemats and set them out on the table/counters before I leave. Only took a few times of touching tape before they quit going up there.
>>
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>>2286802
AYO HOL UP....
>*Kills an entire family unprovoked*
LEMME GET DIS STRAIT....
>*Gets bred for years but still kills people*
.....YOU BE SAYIN LIKE....
>*Is responsible for most of deaths in the USA*
....WE WUZ....SUM
>*Roams the neighbourhoods massacring the animals*
SUM FINNA
>*Fucks up the house because why the fuck not*
LIKE SUM FINNA
>*Tricks you with love only to maul you a second later*
WE WUZ SUM
>*Eats children for lunch and still gets called "Nanny dog"*
BEST DOOOOOGSSS EVEEE-
>*Gets shot by the policeman for aggression/ Released by owner in fear of putting It down for massacring the kindergarten*
>>
>>2287662
At least Pit bulls are cute
>>
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>>2287662
Still better than a fucking cat.
>>
>>2287672
why are dogfags the biggest fags?
>>
>>2287672
>Defending a shitbull
I am a dogfag, But holy shit Anon
>>
>>2287674
>says the catfag
>>
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>>2287674
>>2287678
>>
>>2287679
>>2287682
dont avoid the question pls
>>
AYO HOL UP
>*gets legally shot by American police for moving mouth*
>>
>>2287449
>destroying the ecosystem isn't that bad lol
>>
>>2287520
my cats are happy indoors. 2 out of the 3 don't even want to go outside, and the 1 that does is happy with just an open window
>>
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>>2287518
Why is that cat scratching the marker from dead space?
>>
>>2287705
>good thing humans don't do that on an industrial scale lol
>>
>>2287520
How did you train your cat to hack up hairballs in the litter box? I want to be able to teach any future cats I own that also.
Is it like teaching them to go in the box?
>>
>>2288047
Like all things, repetition, catching them red handed, and rewarding good behaviors

If you hear your cat even begin to cough up, take him and put him in the litter box, then give him a treat. Even if it's a false alarm. My cat associated coughing shit up with going to the litter box, and then getting a treat afterward. He had trouble with it initially, but I realized it was getting better as he would go nearer and nearer towards the box to cough shit up.

Now, he'll wait around the box if he needs to cough, and jump in if he feels something coming
>>
>>2287520
>prevent hairballs

Are those just a DLH thing? I've had several indoor DSH cats and none of them ever puked hairballs. Maybe it's a poor diet thing.
>>
>>2286703
>dogfags this desperate
>>
>>2288073
Desperate about what? Everyone universally loves dogs. The only people that prefer cats are beta male contrarian hipsters on 4chan.
>>
>>2287518

>feels the need to defend against obvious shit posting to attempt to protect cats' special snowflake status

Catfags, everyone. At least dogfags can admit where their pets fuck up.
>>
>>2287672

They're both bad with their huge victim complexes.
>>
>>2288043
I never said humans were good for the environment you retard
>lol one thing is bad for the environment so it's ok for other preventable things to fuck over the environment instead of minimizing the damage
>>
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>>2287759
>>
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>>2287662
>AYO HOL UP....
>>*Kills an entire family unprovoked*
>>
>>2286703
5/5 I love these cute fluffy assholes
Thread posts: 45
Thread images: 12


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