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started talking to this girl a while ago. We talked about dating and eventually we did. For a while it was great, she was sweet and caring and we spent a lot of time together
Then she reveals to me that she's in an abusive relationship with her brother and a neglectful relationship with her mother, and aside from a few friends I'm the only thing she feels actual love for and because of this she uses love for me as a replacement for love for herself. I really only planned on dating casually, and it doesn't feel right to be an emotional crutch.
Then one day, when I'm picking her up for us to spend time together, her brother makes me roll down my window and he tells me that if anything happens to her he'll kill me. These weren't the words of a defensive older brother, this was a threat. I could tell by his delivery and the look on his face. I won't go heavy on details, but judging by what she says he does to her, he seems like someone who would be looking for reasons to hurt someone.
I also haven't told my family about us dating yet, I planned on it before I met her family, but I decided to hold off on it because I feel like her family meeting mine can only lead to bad things. However, I feel like as soon as she finds out I haven't told them, she'll be hurt and her brother will have his reason to do something to me.
I feel like if I just say we should be friends and end the relationship, she'll be deeply hurt because she'll feel as though one of the few things she loves doesn't love her back, and her brother will get angry and act out. Right now things are okay, the girl doesn't realize how terrified I am, but I feel like somethings going to give soon and it isn't going to be pretty.
I don't know what to do guys. It feels like no matter what choice I make, something bad will happen. I don't want to hurt her, I don't want to be hurt and I don't want any of my family to be hurt.
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You can't just keep these feelings of trepidation to yourself. You need to communicate and resolve with her if you ever hope for this to turn out okay. Tell her what you think of her brother, and for the love of god don't lead her to think this is a serious relationship if you don't actually plan on being there for her. It hurts to be strung along.
I think she has her own personal issues that need resolving as well. You can help her maybe but its essentially her responsibility to learn to love herself.
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>>18723599
You a coward boy
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