My girlfriend split up with me today. This is my first serious

If she didn't have the balls to do it in person, then she wasnt worth your time.

Best thing you can do is move on and not worry about her anymore.

Why are you having conversations with her? Work out the logistics (E. G. Moving out, getting your shit from her house, whatever, work out what to do with hokjdays you've booked etc) and keep it business. Then go no contact until you're sure that even if she came begging for you to take her back, you'd probably say no.

>>18709215
You will be ok. You're going to cry a lot for a while but you will move on.

>>18709215
Don't forget the pain anon people will tell you to bit don't do it. Use it as a fuel to make yourself a better person make it so one day she flips on the tv and says I knew that guy.

Also don't talk to her, politely and quietly exit friend circles.

OP, I went through what you're going through back in May.

Allow yourself some grieving time, after all, you've lost a relationship. It's similar to someone close to you dying. Don't be afraid to cry or get upset... don't hold it in hoping it will go away.

But you cannot, under any circumstance, allow this to consume you and change you. You are a beautiful person and deserve the best. All this situation proved is that she wasn't the best for you, especially considering she couldn't even fucking break up with you in person-- shows she's a true coward.

Take your sulking time, grieve a bit, but harness this dark energy and turn it into something magnificent. You have the perfect opportunity to tackle the issues you had in your own life and really blossom. Example: I decided to get my drivers license, lost 40lbs, bought a new wardrobe and really started focusing on building positive relationships with my friends and family again. it's been awesome.

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Suck it up faggot, welcome to the world

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Hey OP, keep your chin up. I'm in the process of going through a break up. I'm just too damn stupid to let go. As the other anon said focus on yourself and the positives of your life. Go to the gym, focus on your friends and or family most importantly socialize.
You will hurt for awhile and take whatever time you need but please don't let it change you are.

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>tfw ended a relationship more than 2 years ago
>tfw still feel shit about it

>>18709215
There's some really good advice in this thread. To add my 2c

1. Don't try to hold back your emotions. Don't blame yourself for having them. It only makes healing harder. You will want to cry, sulk, scream, punch things. You might even think about killing her for what she's done to you (don't do it). It's natural and it will go away. Experience your emotions and let them roll through you.

2. Go absolutely No Contact. She broke up with you in a disrespectful way. You don't owe her anything. You don't owe her a second of your time, comfort, sex, closure, friendship, etc. You probably would love for her to want these things from you but trust me it won't go anywhere. Block her on social media, block her number and lose it, ask any people you have in common not to talk to you about her at all. Resist the urge to check up on her at all.

3. Love yourself. For however long you were together, so much of your thought life probably went to making her happy. Now it's your turn. Take care of yourself; keep up with your hygiene, work out (cardio and lift), take up hobbies or focus more on the ones you have. Nurture your relationships with family and friends you may have neglected while dating her. Those "forever people" are forever people for times like this. If you believe in God, kick up your prayer life a couple notches.

4. Resist the urge to get any kind of revenge on her. She hurt you bad. It's natural to want to do the same to her, but from experience it never really helps. It feels good for a moment then you have to live with yourself. Leave her in a better state than you found her, become (more) awesome and make her regret ever leaving you. If she doesn't or doesn't care, be thankful you wasted a minimal amount of time caring for someone who didn't feel the same.

>>18709215
>>18709831
5. Accept her will on this. She broke up with you. She may change her mind at some future point or have second thoughts. If you have any self-respect you shouldn't take her back at all. The reason is, you don't want to be seen by her as someone that she can just put on a shelf and pick things back up at her whim. That's not fair to you. You deserve someone who will commit to you and honor it for the long term. Also by breaking up with you, she showed that in her soul, she wants to be separate from you. Her emotions or a need for comfort may trick her later into seeking you out but she would most likely dump you again. It gets easier every time.

I'll just say this. The way you're feeling now, you're not going to want to take any of this advice. If you loved her the time may come when you feel like you'd do anything to get her back. Don't. Don't surrender your self-respect or dignity as a man under any circumstance. There are so many women out here looking for love. But you need to be in the right place to give and receive it. Every minute you spend on this dead situation is a minute longer it will take to be ready for the next one. Forgive her, grieve, but then move on. You will come out stronger for this OP. I believe in you.

>>18709215
Also don't listen to any new music for a while. It sucks when you hear a song you really like then it gets tied to heartbreak and you can't listen to it anymore without feeling feels. coughandyleechmuralcough

OP here, thank you so much for all your advice, i greatly appreciate it

My first true love heartbreak happened 7 years ago - I still remember it as clearly as on that day. I still have a very soft spot for the memory of her, but, thankfully, not for her in person. You too will probably remember her for a very long time, but if you do as you're being advised - go no contact, exit some common friend circles and use the time and energy you have to do whatever you wanted to do but couldn't in a relationship - you'll be a much better person once the emotional rollercoaster is over. I did my fair share of drinking and hooking up with random chicks at that time, went to a million awesome concerts and music festivals and had wonderful time flying solo, I regret nothing. Hell, I even like the restaurant she broke up with me in, I see it now as a place that started some really fun episode of my life. Enjoy It, anon!