Thread replies: 12
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1
File: BrandNewScienceFiction.jpg (91KB, 600x600px) Image search:
[Google]
91KB, 600x600px
I feel like I don't feel nothing while I'm feeling so much. It's like a void is eating me from the inside. I feel lonely, sad and depressed most of the time. To be honest I felt like this for my whole life. I'm 21. I've had some achievements in my life. Achievements that a twenty one year old can have. Never felt better after any of them. My mom always told me why I'm not celebrating or what not, she was happy for me but I just didn't ever felt it.
I don't remember being happy when I was a kid, but I probably had my bright moments. I'm not a bitter person. I'm just sad when no one is looking. When I'm with other people they probably don't know that I'm depressed. Other thing is that when I'm with other people I'm almost always drunk. I don't know what's wrong with me.
There were just two episodes when I was truly happy in my life. When I met a really cute girl on the internet which fell in love with me and we had ldr going on together. We texted for almost a year and it ended after couple of my visits I had to her place. She loved me but I fucked it up.
Shortly after we broke up, I made friends with this girl that was going to my college. We bonded really strong and I found the truest soulmate of my life in her. We started as friends but I fell in love her, she wasn't attracted to guys though. After a year I still am in love with her and it left me trainwrecked. The whole time she loved me as much as I did her, but without the romantic affection. I felt happy as never before in my life, everything had meaning and I laughed at my suicidal tendencies which I had - thinking that everything has meaning and leads to somewhere after all. Now I am back at those thoughts. I have lots of people around me, but I just don't feel right with any of them. I can't call a friend just anyone I have to feel a bond, I have to feel comfortable with them.
I'm just lonely.
/adv/ helps me a bit
>>
Could Never Be Heaven
>>
>>18685419
I feel the same way, and even have the same age. Can't help you.
Maybe is just a mind disease. The type that makes people think of suicide, to begin with...
Good luck.
>>
>>18685758
What to do now though? I don't want to kill myself right away but I'm smoking and drinking like a mad man.
>>
>>18685901
>>18685758
hello me. My relationship ended because of luck and me. I'm 20. I'll see a psychiatrist because it's affecting my sleep and I'm turning into a zombie.
>I don't remember being happy when I was a kid, but I probably had my bright moments. I'm not a bitter person. I'm just sad when no one is looking. When I'm with other people they probably don't know that I'm depressed.
me too. I don't remember much as a kid for some weird reason. But after some time everything turned to gray..
>>
>>18686125
Also about the friend thing.. I only have two real friends and our bond is weakening every day as they go on with their lives. And I don't know how to meet new people and no one "clicked" with me, there was no connection or anything. Don't even start with romantic relationships.
>>
Pussies
>>
Anhedonia?
Dystimia?
>>
>>18686191
I think that I have BPD. Should I go to a psychiatrist? I feel weird going to one, like that he will think that I am too into myself for considering this option. Also I think I'm too young to go to a psychiatrist, even if I've been to couple that my mother send me to when I was younger.
>>
>>18685419
At least take care of yourself and of your living environment. You can be certain this as meaning, provided it feels pleasurable to live in a good place with good health.
Work on having good relationships with people for the same reason.
>>
>>18686262
Best advice you can get. Applies to whatever question though.
>>
What even is your deal.
Thread posts: 12
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1