Thread replies: 12
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1
File: 1498197826872.jpg (49KB, 500x684px) Image search:
[Google]
49KB, 500x684px
My best friend has been in an abusive relationship for several years now, since before I met her. She managed to get away from her abusive ex-boyfriend about four months ago and was doing a lot better but now due to circumstances beyond her control they're back in contact. Her ex is currently doing the same thing he always does where he charms her by being the nicest person but we all know that he'll end up hitting her and threatening to kill her again soon.
I was in an abusive relationship myself a couple of years ago and know firsthand that it's not easy to leave one so I don't blame her for not wanting to break off contact but it's beginning to wearing me down. I want to support and help her but I can't do anything because she won't leave him, even after technically leaving the relationship. It's wearing me down to see her suffer and I'm beginning to feel stuck because I can't help her but I don't feel like I can keep supporting her like this either. I also don't want to just break off the friendship with her because I don't want to leave her in this situation by herself since neither of us have a lot of friends.
I don't really know what advice there could be for me so I'm really just venting.
>>
>>18672446
>he'll end up hitting her and threatening to kill her again soon
is there any evidence of this beyond what she claims? Not saying she isn't being honest but it isn't uncommon for women to lie about that sort of thing.
>>
>>18672450
I've seen bruises firsthand and regularly hold her when she cries after the threats. I don't believe she has any reason to lie about any of it, especially since I know she hasn't told anyone but me about most of it.
>inb4 I'm being the cucked nice guy friend
We're both straight women
>>
>>18672465
does she have kids by him?
is she financially dependent on him?
>>
>>18672483
No. They're both in college, he has a part time job as a server in a chain restaurant and she's financially dependent on her parents. No children.
>>
>>18672446
Talk about it with her tell her how worried you are about her safety, and how that isn't how healthy relationships work. In the end though it is her decision, she will have to come to the realization that she isn't in a healthy, or safe, relationship.
>>
>>18672503
I've been doing this for the entire time I've known but thank you for your advice, anon. I'll try to stay with her through this.
>>
>>18672495
>she's financially dependent on her parents. No children.
then she just needs to peace out and get a new man. Simple as that.
As for you, what you can do is set her up on some dates with new guys. Also, you should tell her bluntly she is stupid for not seeing other people.
>>
You can't save her. Is there any function in college she could use for support? Does her parents know about the situation?
>>
>>18672552
That's actually a really good idea, thank you anon! I have at least two single male friends who I think would be up her alley, I'll see if I can arrange something this weekend.
>>18672566
Not sure, she said she went to the college therapist(? I'm not in college so not sure) once but didn't like him. I've been trying to convince her to go to therapy but haven't managed to get her to do it yet. Her parents know about some of it but can't really do anything about it.
>>
>>18672583
You could contact the therapist yourself and book her an appointment and tell her she needs to speak to her parents or you will and basically have an intervention. But these are extreme actions and yes you might loose her as a friend.
>>
>>18672583
>That's actually a really good idea, thank you anon!
you're welcome, and good-luck, she should be grateful to have a friend like you.
Thread posts: 12
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1